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- [00:00]
Ed Mylett
So, hey guys, listen. We're all trying to get more productive and the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth based environment, that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love Growth Day. Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Burchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down. Growthday.com forward/ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way, he's asked me, I post videos in there every single Monday that gets your day off to the right start. He's got about 5,000, $10,000 worth of courses that are in there that come with the app. Also, some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content in there on a regular basis, like having the avengers of personal development and business in one app. And I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis. And I do. So go over there and get signed up. You're going to get a free tuition, free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also. So go to growthday.com forward/ed. That's growthday.com forward slash ed. Hey, it's Ed Mylett. Let me share something powerful with you. You know, in uncertain times, the smartest people I know protect what they've built. That's why Advantage Gold is a part of our program now. And what I love about what they're doing is they're giving away a free gold and silver investor kit that walks you through exactly how to get started. Text Wynn to 85545 to get your free kit. That's win to 85545. Don't wait for the next crash. Be the one who's ready. Protect, prepare and prosper. Mess rates may apply. Performance varies. Always consult your financial and tax professional.
- [01:37]
Rob Dyrdek
This is the Ed Mylett Show.
- [01:42]
Ed Mylett
Hey, everyone. Welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. This week I one of the questions that I got was, Ed, do you have any strategies that you can suggest to me on how I can improve the overall quality of my life, including gratitude and by the way, everyone's asking these things that I don't hear from everybody else. And so I want to give you some things that you're not going to hear everybody from everybody else. So listen, I want you to write this topic down. I want you to write this word down. Observer. The quality of your life will increase dramatically if you begin to believe and act like an observer in your life. I want you to think about that just for a second. Observe really means to notice or perceive. One of the reasons we lack such gratitude or even happiness in our life is it's all happening so fast, and so we've lost sensory acuity in our life. What means is that there's just information and stuff happening all the time. We're busy. Our phone, our laptop, our computer, our tv, our Netflix, the meetings we have, the calls we have, our family, the obligations, the travel, whatever it might be, work. We just don't have time to observe. And so everything just happens quickly and we don't get any of the juice out of our life. And as a result, that's very difficult to be grateful. One of the ways that I define myself now is I'm an observer. What I mean by that is I'm an observation. I'm in my life as a participant. It's going to get pretty deep. I'm in my life as a participant every single day. I'm in my meetings, I have my phone calls, I have my family, I have my workouts, I have my dreams and the things I'm achieving. But if you're not careful, all the speed of that, all the busyness of that, you don't see anything, you don't feel anything, you don't experience anything in any depth. The depth of experience is the quality of our life. And so maybe about a decade ago, and probably a lot more about five years ago, I started to call myself to myself. I'm an observer of my own life. I'm an observer of humanity. I'm an observer of other people's lives. And so the more I started to condition myself to be more observational, to notice more, to perceive more, maybe I even slowed down just a little bit the depth of the gratitude in my life, the depth of my ability to make decisions, my discernment, my intuition, frankly my intellect, I have tapped into a superpower by becoming more observational. It's all. I'm going to give you examples and the teachings in a second. It's also caused me to be more grateful, more present, more peaceful. Yet at the same time, when I need to be even more intense and competitive than I've ever been before. That's because I'm in my life. Most people are just in their life and they never are aware of it, they never observe it. Observation causes awareness. The happiest people, and by the way, the people that I love to be around the most in my life are the most self aware. I think it's one of the reasons I love stand up comedians so much. So many of them are my friends because they're so funny, because they're so self aware. They also, many of them use observational comedy. They observe things about life that we miss every single day. And then when they point it out, it's funny. Am I right? That's the only thing really, most comedy, a lot of comedies, observations like, well, that I, I, we just miss it, but it's there. And so when a comedian tells us a joke about something, we go that way or even take, don't take, comedian take. In your religious services, any of you that practice, your pastor or priest or rabbi or whatever it might be, will point something out. And it's something that you should be seeing and observing every day in your life, but you just miss. And then when they point it out, you go, yeah, that's obvious. So I want to talk to you a little bit about this for a minute. Number one, start to show more respect for people. What do I mean by that? What I mean by that is put your phone down when someone walks in a room, Put your phone down when you go to dinner or lunch with them. Don't put it on the table, put it in your bag, put it in your purse, put it in your lap, leave it in the car. This forces you to become more observational and present with people. And when you do that, it changes your life. So I become observational of these various things. I'm gonna teach you how to do it. God's stuff. I observe God's stuff more into a level of depth that I never did. And this is going to sound hokey, but I'm going to give you some insights in it. I spend more time when I go outside and I hold my gaze at God's beauty longer. It's not that you don't walk outside and see a beautiful field or a stream or even a building that one of God's creatures as an architect created. But you hold it quickly. I've started to observe. This may sound really weird, but I did this this morning. I walked out behind my house. There's an ocean out there. Which I can observe God's beauty there. But I did something much more simple. There's a. Like, I wish I could show you. Well, I kind of could. I don't know if you guys can see that right out there if you're watching on YouTube. There's, like a garden above my water feature there. And I just walked out there, and I sat there for a few minutes, and I just stared at one leaf on one tree. And I kind of forced myself to observe it longer than I might. Just one leaf. I narrowed my focus down to one leaf and the nuances of it and the crevices. And I started to notice the different color in it and where it was cracked in one place. And I held that gaze for a good minute. Very different than normal. Just, oh, there's a tree. And then I moved to another one. Another tree with a different leaf on it. And I spent some time observing it. I was much more present with myself. Much more present. I then walked back in the house, and my family was having breakfast. Instantaneously, I was more present. And when I walked in, I paused for a second and I held the gaze and I watched my family and the beauty of them. My precious son's home from college. So is my daughter. They were both actually in the kitchen at the same time. They said, hey, what's going on, guys? I stopped. I just held a gaze. It's my only son. It's my only little girl. And I watched them for a little bit, and I appreciated them for a little bit. I let myself feel love for them just for a little bit. Just for a little bit. Filled me with gratitude. So I'm grateful for that. There's all these things around us all the time that if we just held the gaze a little longer and stopped looking around, not just put our phone down, that's basic. But just became fully present with a leaf, with a building, with a water feature, with a piece of you ever. I do this lately where I stare at my hand and I just notice things about me that I've never noticed before. You know, most of you aren't familiar with your own hand. If I showed you your hand in a picture of the inside of your hand, you're probably not even familiar with where the lines are exactly. I think that's my hand. I'm not sure it's my hand. If I don't even know that about me, what else don't I know about me? That's a pretty basic thing. I've been so busy, man, my gosh. I went Decades. Never looked at my own hand. I mean, I see I have a hand, but you know what I mean. That depth of observation causes you, by the way, to vibrate much faster in a higher frequency. It causes you to have more gratitude and appreciation. It causes you to be more present with other people. I'm going to tell you right now, your decision making, your thought processes, your ability to control your emotions are exponentially connected to your ability to observe and be present. And this is a skill, it is a talent, and it is not easy. I want to also tell you what I observed that's changed my life. I take time every day now to observe my breathing. You take for granted your breathing every single day, but if it stopped right now, you end. It's probably something to pay attention to. So if I can get quiet and just pay attention to my breathing and hear myself and feel myself breathe, I'm much more self connected. I'm much more grateful. I'm much more centered. I'm much smarter instantly. Instantly. I'm stronger and smarter and more present. If you can't be present with yourself, you have no way in the world of being present with other people. You're like, hey, man, I'm busy. Number one thing in business, ability to build rapport and connect with people. If you can't connect and build rapport and connect with yourself, you can't do it with other people. People say to me all the time, your interviews are just different. In fact, Ed, I see some guests on one show, I see them on yours, it's a completely different conversation. Why is that? I think it's my ability to be present with them and connect with them because I'm connected with myself. So I ask a smarter question. In the moment, I can feel something, an energy from them that others don't feel and they feel from me. Now that makes a good podcast, but it also makes a good salesperson, it also makes a good mother, it also makes a good everything. And so it's something that I really work on. So I perceive God's stuff, art. I perceive architecture. My breathing is a huge one. Just for today, give yourself a gift. Just for a second right now, feel yourself breathe. Remember that guy? Remember her? She's been there all the time. You busy? You distracted you. She's been there all the time. Pay a little more attention to her. Pay a little bit more attention to him. It'll help you pay attention to everybody else. She's with you all the time. He's always been there. There's only been two constants in your entire life, God and you. How much attention do you pay to each of you? You got to give yourself that gift. It's why you're not happy. It's why you're not more productive. It's why you're not more influential. It's why you're not richer. It's why you don't have the emotions you want. It's why you don't have the body you want. It's why you don't have the things you want. Whatever the things are that you're lacking. It comes down to self awareness, presence and connection with oneself and one's maker. I pay attention to humanity. One thing I do a little bit more of than I've ever done in my life is when I walk into places, I observe people. I observe people. I walk into a restaurant, I'll watch until they come up to me. I'll watch people. And even when they do come up to me while they're talking, I observe them. I'm present with them. I look at their face. I wonder what their story is. I wonder what their history is. I love to people watch when I'm not noticed and I'm alone in an airport or somewhere. And I love just to watch God's creations, these precious humans. I know this may sound hokey, but I do it a lot and I pray for them. I'll people walk by me on the street. If they don't recognize me, I'll peace be with you. I just have that thought. This connects me to people. This gives me gratitude and depth. I don't want to be a one dimensional human being. I want to have multiple dimensions and experience multiple emotions. And the way I do that is I observe. Sounds corny, but I love if there's stars out at night just to observe and take the time and notice them. You've all done this once or twice in your life and it's just felt good. You can give yourself the gift of that every single day. Something I do kind of semi regularly is I just look at me in the mirror and notice things about me that are aging or that have changed or. But I like being present with me. It makes me more comfortable with me. I never liked myself before. I never liked myself. I built muscles on my body and made millions of dollars and knew famous people and did all these things to sort of hide from me. That's not a way to live. Pay attention to your breathing. Pay attention to people. Pay attention to humanity. Pay attention to God's stuff. Pay attention to people. Give Them the respect. Show up on time, show up early. Hold your gaze with someone longer when you see him, hey, man, how are you? You know you do, hey, man, how are you? And hold the gaze a little longer. Hi, sister, I love you. When you walk into your office, just hold the gaze a little longer. Ask the question and listen. Just another tick. How are you? No, man, how are you? See the difference? How you doing, buddy? All right, My man. It's supposed to, hey, man, how are you? And hold the gaze and listen. It's good stuff how I sold so much. It's how I got so rich. It's not why I did it. Well, I got the biggest podcast. It's why people think I'm the best or one of the best speakers in the world. So if you're thinking, hey, man, this is foo foo. This is business, too. How are you? You okay? What's going on? What do you got that you're excited about? And listen. And here's a biggie. This was a hard one for me. Hold the hug longer. When you see somebody hold the hug. Let me give you some data. After a six seconds in a hug, the brain starts to release oxytocin and serotonin. Before that, it doesn't. So if I hug you, hey, what's up? Right? Or, hey, it's nothing. If you hold a hug for six seconds, your brain now floods, starts to release, by the way, serotonin and oxytocin into both of you. Oxytocin. You know, you're getting pleasure from that. People get addicted to this. You're getting pleasure from that. It also increases your immune system and reduces depression. If you can hold the hug for 10 seconds, you get what they call a serotonin oxy flood. A flood. So you're not only giving yourself that gift if you can do it, but you're giving yourself the gift to other people. What I'm basically saying here on Everything is if you could just hold the gaze a little longer, if you could pay attention to your breathing a little more, if you could just take a flower or a book or your hand or something and just get present with it and notice the different things, become an observer and noticer of things. If when you hug somebody, all the data tells us, hug it for six seconds, you both get the gift. You wait, if you do four seconds, you don't get any of it. Hold it for two more seconds, and you get this flood of oxytocin and serotonin. That's just one of God's greatest gifts. It's basically the gratitude chemical if you want more gratitude. And so I know this is not stuff you think, wow, man, my tattoo, jacked up. You know, Super Rich guy, that podcast, you listen to him now, he's talking about holding hugs longer and looking at flowers and staring at his hand and paying attention to his breathing and. Yeah, because the question was, Ed, what is something that I can do to have more happiness, success and gratitude that most people never talk about? So I could give you the normal list that everybody else talks about that I've talked about, or I could start on Thursdays to give you stuff you don't hear anywhere in the world. And it's this. And so. And that's why right now I can shift gears and get super intense because I'm fully present, I'm fully self aware in the moment. Doesn't mean I always am, but it's helped me control my emotions, it's helped me control my thinking, my intellect, my relationships, all of it. And overall, be a more blissful, peaceful human being, a more connected one, if you really want to know the truth. So many of you pray every single day, but you're just checking the box. Can you be present in that moment and have an appreciation and gratitude for this beautiful time you're connecting with your maker? In my case, my savior. Can you just get a little bit more of the juice? Because here's what you're thinking. I'll get around to that, man. That's cool. I'll get around to that once I'm successful. I'm telling you, you won't be successful. If you don't, you won't be. These are the things that have taken an average, ordinary man like me and built a pretty good life. I have bad days, I have ups and downs. I have emotions. I'm human. I think I pretty much share that on Instagram all the time. I want to experience the bad emotions. Whatever you think is bad. I don't think there are good or bad emotions. They're just our emotions. Right? I want to have all of them. I want to be present for them. I want to observe them, I want to be aware of them. I don't want to just go through my life busy grabbing, accumulating stuff and thinking, someday when I'm old, I'll get around to it. And what I found out was I started doing this young and that's how I got all the stuff. But at the same time, you can't love yourself if you don't know yourself. And you can't Know yourself if you don't spend any time with yourself. And so you got to spend some time, man. It's such a great gift just to walk outside and go, what can I observe? Or even in your office, what can I observe? You know that before I started this zoom, I'm like, I want to make sure the background's together. This is a true thing. I want to make sure the background is together. I've done a million zooms from where I am. Can I tell you something? I started this, and I went, what is that belt buckle? If you're on audio, it doesn't matter. What is that belt buckle? Oh, my gosh. That's when I won that golf tournament with Milt Walker. Do you know how many zooms I've done? And that thing's been there the whole time. I've never noticed it once. It's right in my spatial awareness, and I haven't noticed it. What does that say? Right? So then I got up, and before this, we started, and I'm like. I stared at the belt buckle, and I'm like, oh, Wyatt Earp. I remember that tournament. Then there's a sign that we won it, and they put this thing on our locker. And I remember the shot I hit to the 18th green. That was a crazy good seven iron I hit. And then Milty had to make the putt from, like, six, eight feet, and he drained the putt, and we jumped up and down and hugged. Everyone cheered, and we won this golf tournament. It took me all the way back to that moment of total bliss. And it's only because I noticed it finally. But guess what? That did for me then I'm like, crap, man, that was a victory. I win stuff. I'm a winner. Forgot we won that sucker, man. I've been winning stuff forever, right? And it changed my state. It reminded me I win. It reminded me I'm supposed to win. It reminds me good things happen to me. Because, quite frankly, this morning, a bunch of bad things happened. And I had to record two podcasts today. And I sat in here for like, an hour before I recorded the first one, thinking, how can I deliver, man? I just don't have the juice today. I don't know that I want to do it. Someone wants me to talk about gratitude on a day where my day just started out crappy. And it was one small observation of the belt buckle over my head on zoom that I didn't just take note of. I got up and looked at it, and it took me into that moment, and it Completely shifted me. Something that simple. So observation changes everything in your life. And let's go back to that golf shot I hit. You know what required me to hit that golf shot at that time? And I'm not a great golfer. This is just a golf tournament. But you know why I had the capacity to hit that golf shot, my best golf shot, under that most pressure? Because I was fully in that moment. I had fully appreciated that moment. And I took it all in. By the way, I can tell you because I remember before I hit the shot, I was debating, is it a 6 or 7? I threw the grass up in the air. And I can tell you right now, I can see that grass kind of just dropped down right onto my shirt and didn't blow over me. I can see those blades of grass right now. I remember going, now the wind's not blowing that bad. I think I can hit seven. And I remember I stepped back, I took one practice swing, had a bad back. Then my back feels pretty good. And I got over that shot fully present, fully in the moment. My. My golf ball says max out on it. And the M was facing me. And I remember, just keep your eye on the M. Hit the M. I noticed the smallest possible observation. And right when I hit that thing, I knew it was clear. And he hit a good golf show. Gave you that compression sound. I'm like, that was a good one. That was a good one. And there was about a hundred people, 150 people gathered around the green. And I remember when it landed, that must have been a good one. Milti goes, that's a good one, right? Remember, all the way back to that moment, that moment. And just a nothing golf tournament. It's just a simple example of observation, being fully present, controlling and being paying attention to my breathing, by the way, in that moment, too. And then executing all the way back. I don't know. That was 15 years ago. I've done probably 2,000 zooms in this seat and never noticed that belt buckle sitting right up there until today. Because I'm an observer and I wasn't having a great day. I turn and look, there's the belt buckle. And I'm like, I'm going to go observe more of it. I'm going to take the nuance and the detail, not a glance. I'm going to hold the gaze a little longer. And as I held that belt buckle up to me and I looked at. Took me right back into that moment of when we won. Completely changed my state. That's why this stuff matters. So hold the hug a little longer. Give people the respect of showing up. Notice and perceive a little bit more. Pay attention to your breathing. Notice God's stuff. Notice architecture. Notice people. Notice humanity. Hold the gaze. Take in more detail. Get more of the juice and all of the juice you want in your life. Of the other things are much more likely to happen as a result. The man to my left is literally one of the most interesting men in the world. This is Rob Dyrdek. Thank you for being here, brother. We had a mutual friend. I won't say who it is. It was a very well known dude. This is a long time ago too. And your show was on in the background. I was at his house. I'm like, this dude's hilarious. And the guy checked me, he goes, just so you know, he's not just hilarious. This dude's special. This dude's like a freak. He's like a super, super successful guy. As a business guy, I'm like, yeah, right. Then I started to research. I'm like, oh, my God. Now having the conversation, I like, I get it. You know, I understand why. Let's talk about Brianna for a second, though.
- [24:53]
Dean Graziosi
Sure.
- [24:54]
Ed Mylett
So you said something, man, that's just like, blew me away because I think it's true in business, it's true in family, it's true in fitness and everything. You said that you were kind of one, kind of a dude living a certain way and that you knew that you needed to become a certain version of you in order to attract the spouse, the mate, the life partner that you wanted in your life. And I think that's true. Like in business, we have to become that person too. So tell them about how you did that and what you were thinking.
- [25:23]
Dean Graziosi
You know, I would almost equate it the same way that I was saying earlier where I was just doing all of this, like, different stuff, thinking that one was going to show me the way. I would think that I. I was thinking, like, eventually I would find the right woman that would make the right man, you know, like, make you the right man. Right. You know what I mean? Like, that sort of idea. And I just knew that the same time of sort of this, this revolution of mindset of like, no, you need to start to be the person that you want to be. And I think that ultimately it allowed me to create the narrative and the storyline of like, this, if the perfect woman for me should love the way that I am, not wish that I could change to be the way they wish I was, if you will.
- [26:24]
Ed Mylett
Right.
- [26:24]
Dean Graziosi
And to me I tried to be. To create that in all aspects of life. So when I did, finally found her, because God brought her right to me, you know what I'm saying? I was like, man, I'm not. It was like. Like, I did a year of, like, really in this, like, deep mindset, kept telling every one of my friends, you have got to. You have got to be like this if you want to find great love. You've got to prepare yourself for great love. Which, I mean, I was, like, preaching it, and they were just so. When she showed up, they were like, it worked. It wasn't like. It wasn't like, oh, Rob, like, he's. I preached it so loud and so pure to, like, every single one of them on how they needed to act and if you really wanted to. And it was. It was. I kid you not, every single one of my friends, I had preached it so much that when, like, I would introduce her as it happened, you know what I mean? Like, it really, like, can you believe it? Like, and the trippiest thing about it is, you know, there's all these expectations and thoughts and excitement that comes into, like, thinking you met the one right now. Let reality set in, right? Like, oh, it's this. And imagine now the opposite is the reality of your love, and life is actually 10 times better than you could have ever envisioned when you laid out the most perfect scenario.
- [27:57]
Ed Mylett
You're such a good guy, too. You know the other thing you won't say about yourself, but everybody that knows you, that knows me, just the first thing they don't tell me is about your brilliance or your success. It's not the first thing they tell me. I say, he's just such a good man. He cares about people so much, and that's why this is so real.
- [28:10]
Dean Graziosi
And which is ultimately, you want that. You know what I mean? Like, you also, like. Like, you want that to be part of your reputation and ultimately why people respect you. Yeah, I mean, I want to be respected for, like, being, like, the man, the father, the husband, the family man, like, someone working. I want, like, to be respected for the way that I live life and the type of person I am as opposed to what I simply achieve.
- [28:42]
Ed Mylett
Yeah, I think you are. I think you're becoming that, and I'm proud of you, and we're just getting to know each other. I want you to do one thing for me, though. I want them to know this about you. I think all people should be. I think people matter. Things don't. Right. I have that philosophy, and I think you're amazing at creating moments. And I'm not talking about, like, shark attacks and jockeying a horse or anything. I'm talking about, like, life moments. Like, you're conscious of creating moments. So within this structure of your life, which you are, like, in your businesses, you're very systematized, you're very. You need that, you. You want that, yet you have this complete freedom to have all these magic moments. So, like, just real quick, I want to go through a couple with you that I just know about. Like, your first date with Brianna wasn't even normal. Didn't you, like, go rescue puppies or something on a first date? Like, is that right? Or.
- [29:28]
Dean Graziosi
Yeah, look, so look, I mean, you.
- [29:30]
Ed Mylett
Take this for granted. That's not a normal first date look.
- [29:33]
Dean Graziosi
No, you don't know. That wasn't. It wasn't intended to be that way. It was, you know, just. Just taking a shot. Right?
- [29:40]
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
- [29:41]
Dean Graziosi
And we had. We had. We met via DM on Twitter, the modern way that love formed. And she was posting about, like, these, like, you know, big thing that had been going on is like, this kennel was getting youth. They're euthanizing all the dogs in Bakersfield. And so, you know, I was texting her and, you know, asking her, you know, would you like to hang out this. This weekend? You know, what do you have in mind to do? And so I, I was thinking it was in Ontario or somewhere close. I was thinking, let's go rescue these puppies. We can drive out there. And I'm like, ah, it's like six hours away. But I still, you know what I was thinking? We take a helicopter to Bakersfield, rescue these puppies. You know what I mean? Just being all, like, you know, slick and funny. So funny. And like, a half hour later, she was like, sure or no, she was like, perfect. And I'm like, what? I'm like, that was kind of a joke. And then I got a. Can somebody get me a helicopter? And we never spoke on the phone anything. Like, you know, first time we met was like, you know, like, picked her up and drove straight to the airport and jumped in a helicopter and got to know each other by flying to Bakersfield to rescue some puppies. And look, and I was so deep. And now we're in a moment. Okay, now we're in a moment. And throughout that flight, I. I was like, not even a question. This is who I meant to marry and spend the rest of my life. So it's instant for me. So I'm like, since this is so Instantaneous. I'm like, we gotta get a puppy to remember this by. But it's still like first date. Like you still want to try to get this puppy into this helicopter right now. Like, like the fact that we did not actually rescue a puppy that day.
- [31:30]
Ed Mylett
So you did not get a puppy that day. But then like you repeat this, like these moments, like in. By the way, there's dudes listening. Well, I can't afford a helicopter. Just do something special, man.
- [31:38]
Dean Graziosi
Yeah.
- [31:38]
Ed Mylett
Just find a way to make a moment, make a memory. Right? Take a walk, you know, do something.
- [31:42]
Dean Graziosi
Look, I went, yeah, you just took another helicopter.
- [31:44]
Ed Mylett
Right. On your anniversary though.
- [31:45]
Dean Graziosi
Yeah. Much sketchier one that she was not happy with. Like, when we get in this tiny. Where I was like, I didn't even like think about the first one. We was such a long trip. It was a more sizable manageable one. We get in this like somebody's backyard copter, we take over there. But look again, it's, let's go have fun. Right? Like I am. My success is not predicated on trying to achieve some sort of financial milestone that I can do anything other than live an amazing life. And being able to surprise her with a helicopter trip to Catalina, you know, having the kids taken care of and like she doesn't know what it is. And then like, oh, then this super unique adventure where we land on the top of a mountain. I don't know if you've ever been there, but you got to land at an airport in the sky, 1600ft, then take a 40 minute drive down a sketchy road to get to the town. Super weird. And driving by bison because they did a movie in the twenties and left all these bison over there. It was just this.
- [32:51]
Ed Mylett
It's Catalina, right?
- [32:52]
Dean Graziosi
Yeah, yeah, it's a. Have you ever been to the.
- [32:55]
Ed Mylett
Okay, I helicoptered over.
- [32:57]
Dean Graziosi
Look, I never been there. I don't even know what it was. But for us, that should be what life's about. It's like, go on, go experience. Just a 12 hour adventure. You know what I mean? We left at 4, came back at 8 the next morning, had to take our daughter to the pediatrician. I had to go do meetings all day. Right.
- [33:13]
Ed Mylett
It's amazing how you navigate these different.
- [33:16]
Dean Graziosi
Spaces and it's such a fun, great experience. Experience. And I think not only do I set the precedent for it in our, in our life, and I'm, you know, whether it's like every, every occasion I try to, to put that level in, you do it every morning into it.
- [33:36]
Ed Mylett
Every morning with Your little ones.
- [33:37]
Dean Graziosi
Right. Like, and I want to add those experiences long term for the kids too. Yeah, I mean like so that there are moments that they can look back and, and that you know, their dad is, you know, I'm not a normal dad, you know, I'm a little bit nutty, you know. And that how that ultimate, you know, I'm pretty disciplined and militant with, with the children from a structure standpoint which does include full fledged full scale singing every single morning at like the highest level. Dancing. Sometimes I'll make him just like dance before he gets out of bed, you know, like, and hit him with the positive reinforcement of like been drilling in his head over and over. He's happy, I'm happy, I'm happy.
- [34:19]
Rob Dyrdek
Strong, strong.
- [34:20]
Dean Graziosi
Smart, smart, healthy. Healthy. And just self belief of just you can do anything because you believe in. You say I believe in me. I believe in me, right?
- [34:32]
Ed Mylett
It's, it's amazing. It's.
- [34:36]
Dean Graziosi
Let's give this them this beautiful house of love and peacefulness and then just try to have belief in themselves and help nourish that. Because at the end of the day it's the only way you ever do anything.
- [34:50]
Ed Mylett
Right.
- [34:50]
Dean Graziosi
It's like even when people call it experience, experience is just gaining knowledge to believe that you can go achieve something at a higher level. Right. And you're only your pursuit why you stay in lanes that you fully understand because you believe you can do it because you understand it well enough. Right. And when you take that step out to learn something new, you have to be sitting there with some doubt on whether or not you could do it because you've never done it before. You don't have a foundation of belief. But if your life is about taking risks and you believe that you can figure anything out along the way, you take that leap into that new thing in a system of how you create belief to make sure that you can irregardless of whatever that may be.
- [35:39]
Ed Mylett
That's amazing people watching this. Two of the more successful entrepreneurs under the age of 50 in a room together. And then like, you know, what do you do with your families? He gets up every morning and sings with his. I dance with my daughter every morning. I show her a move in the 90s every morning. I told you that. And you do your sayings with your kids and mine with my son. As you're a leader, you're a gladiator, you're the greatest of all time. He's been hearing that since he was a little boy. My daughter is that she's a superstar and she can do anything. Hugs, not drugs. I do these things. Everyone, you know, they're at the age where they roll their eyes now, right? But the fact is we both do these things where we do this wacky crap with our kids. Support for today's show comes from Square, and I'm glad it did because they've supported us for a while here as well. Square is your all in one business partner, making your day to day easier. From point of sale systems and payments to inventory and customer tools, Square brings everything together in one simple platform. So you can stay organized, sell anywhere and keep things moving. One of the first things I noticed about Square was just how easy it is to use. Running a business involves a lot of moving parts and Square helps simplify that entire process. So if you're running a cafe, a salon, a boutique, or something entirely on your own, Square gives you the flexibility to grow at your own pace and even set up an online store in just a few clicks. So if you want to run an online business there where you can go to get it set up, and right now, here's what's incredible, you got to check them out. Listeners get up to 200 off Square hardware when you sign up@square.com go ed. That's sq a r e.com go ed. Visit Square to get started because the right tools make all the difference. Welcome to AutoZone. What are you working on today? My car is making this noise. Sometimes it's like. And sometimes it's like. Do you have a dash light on?
- [37:25]
Rob Dyrdek
Oh yeah.
- [37:25]
Ed Mylett
Then we don't have to listen for clues. With the free fix finder service, we can read a check engine ABS or maintenance light to find the likely fix and even recommend a local shop if you need one.
- [37:35]
Rob Dyrdek
So you don't need to hear the.
- [37:38]
Ed Mylett
Not with fix finder everything you need nothing.
- [37:41]
Rob Dyrdek
You don't get in the zone.
- [37:43]
Ed Mylett
Auto zone restrictions apply. So, hey guys, you know what separates most businesses from others? The people that hire the best talent. And we all know when you're working in a small business and you own one, it means you wear a bunch of different hats. But here's the truth. Sometimes you really need an extra pair of hands. And upwork is the place that you can find those hands. Upwork is how good companies find great trusted freelance talent in a variety of different areas. Companies turn to upwork all the time to get things done, finding more flexibility in the way they staff, key projects, initiatives where they want to go global with stuff. Top talent in it, web development, AI design, admin marketing, you name it. Public posting a job on upwork is easy. Upwork makes the business process easier, simpler way more affordable with industry low fees. So post a job today and you can hire tomorrow on Upwork. Visit Upwork.com right now and post your job for free. That is Upwork.com to post your job for free and connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. That's up w o r k.com upwork.com very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. So my guest today really doesn't need an introduction, but I'm gonna give him one. And I think he's the most feared football coach by other coaches on planet Earth today. Maybe, maybe, maybe in the history of college football. Nobody wants to mess with this dude or play against him. Coach Prime, Deion Sanders, welcome to the show, my friend. Thank you for being here.
- [39:15]
Rob Dyrdek
And I love that introduction I got. I'm gonna, we, we're recording this. So I'm gonna wake up every morning, this is how I'm going to wake up every morning. I'm going to just play that intro and then I'm gonna get up.
- [39:26]
Ed Mylett
Yeah, he has this chapter in the book. I want you to get the book and read it. But he basically says make confidence your natural odor. You just need to read this chapter, you guys. On confidence. It's really, by the way, I read, I read this book like this, like, I got it late and I read it like this. There's another thing I want to ask you about because I never really, I've heard these terms. I don't even know the distinction between them. The next chapter in the book, he says, are you a leader or a dog? And this, this applies to life, not just football. What's the difference between a leader and a dog?
- [39:56]
Rob Dyrdek
See, coaching, you normally see the C on the chest and cap. I, I reserved that for the military. I deserve, I reserved that for the police force and all that. And I have a heck of a respect. I don't think it should be a guy with C on his chest and the captain, especially now in the NFL, you got a quarterback that has to see on his chest. Now he's leaving because he wants to get paid more for another team. So how can your captain abort the ship and board the plant? I don't like that. I have leaders and I have dogs. Every leader ain't a dog, and every dog ain't a leader. I don't expect the dog to be the leader, and I don't expect the leader to be the dog. I expect you to be you. And just because you walk in the front and just because you talk the loudest and just because you make the most money, that don't make you a leader. A leader. Is. Is that that thing that Janie Saqua that you have? That. That's infectious. That makes people want to follow you, that makes people want to listen to you, that makes people want to read your books, that make people want to just. Just find out more about you and Google you. That. That's that thing that you have that you don't have to walk in the front. You. You don't have to. Because when I played the game, believe it or not, I never made speeches to my teams I played for. I never called everybody up and say, okay, this is what we're gonna. I never did that. I led through action and I led through consistency. I didn't lead vocally. I led to action and consistency because you gotta understand, I was coming in football late because I was playing baseball. In baseball, I was one of the young guys because baseball players go up to age 40. I was still a young pup in most of the teams that I played for and playing two sports. So I was there the full time as well. So I was never the guy that they would have put a C on his chest, but I was a leader. But the dog is that innate person that, that you, you never mistake a dog for a cat. You, you never mistake a, a, a, a, a dog for a person who won't swing first. You, you know that, that dog is that guy who's gonna swim first. Yeah, he gonna have a one foot bag. She gonna take her earrings off and you know, she gonna put Vaseline on her face. And you know she ready. She brought some tennis shoes. They said you could get the grip, she gonna take off the heel. Like that's. That's the dough that he's ready to get down no matter what. He's a dog. In, in life, sometimes you got to be both, man. And sometimes you got to be both. Sometimes when you call a meeting with your staff, not only you got to be a leader, but sometimes you got to be a dog. And some of us are equipped with being able to hit a switch and to be both, but some people are not. But you got to know who you are at this age and stage of your Life, it would be. You would be a fool not to understand who you are.
- [42:40]
Ed Mylett
I think I have a year of eligibility left. I don't know how many 52 year olds you're signing, but I would love, I probably still play strong safety or something. I would, I would run through a damn wall right now. What is a man? I just, I, I got to tell you, like, there's such substance to the book. Like, he's obviously like this amazing communicator, but man, that's a separator in life. It's like you can say all these pretty things, but at some point you got to walk it too, right? Like you got to walk the walk as a leader, right? And you think your kids pick up on this with you? Not just like, because obviously you walk in a room, you got cachet, you're the goat, right? So there, there's something to that. Like this is coach prime. And my God, you get the chance to be around the greatest of all time at something. But I gotta think after like a month or two, you're the coach, like they gotta see you currently walking some type of a walk as a leader. And I feel like a lot of leaders, even parents, like, well, at one time I did this, so you shouldn't. Everything I say now, right? But I think you have to be relevant in your leadership currently as well, right? Would you feel that way for you, 100% correct.
- [43:48]
Rob Dyrdek
Because what I did is what I did. Today's kids are more into the now. Like everything they looking at on social media deals with the now. They, they may recollect and go through your page and see what you did yesterday, but they only looking at that to establish the consistency. Are you that guy now that you were yesterday and the day before? So what people are looking for is reality because we have such a fake and a false world that everybody could go purchase what they want to look like, they want to feel like, they want to be who they want. Everybody could go purchase that now. And everybody is attracted to authenticity whether they believe it or not. And everybody is opposed to authenticity whether they want it or not. Because the most successful music acts or, or, or celebrities that can sing or rap or whatever, they're authentic. We, we feel like we know them, like we can touch them. And, and, and they allow us to know that they made mistakes. Nobody's looking for Mr. Or Mrs. Perfect anymore. They looking for flawed people that will stand up and say, you know what? I did that, man, that was me. That, okay, that was me. I did that. I messed that up. But guess what? Guess what I learned from that mistake. Oh, my God. Thank God that happened to me because I would never take that left again.
- [45:09]
Ed Mylett
I'm just gonna stay right so.
- [45:11]
Rob Dyrdek
If it wasn't for that left, I wouldn't even know what to write. I love the hate. You know why I'm attracted to the hate? Because if it wasn't for the hate, Ed, I wouldn't know what love feels like. I wouldn't know what love looks like. I. I wouldn't know what love was about if I didn't receive the hate, because I know that ain't love.
- [45:27]
Dean Graziosi
So.
- [45:28]
Rob Dyrdek
So this has to be.
- [45:29]
Ed Mylett
Wow. When you get hate, Coach, do you ever. Because you do get it. You're lightning rod for it. You even had another coach this year say some stuff that you leveraged it really well, though. We won't go. We won't go into all that stuff that happened. But, like, boy, I was watching you the week of that game. I'm like, oh, man, thank God you won that game, too. But, like, I remember the week of that game going, oh, boy, this dude made a huge mistake saying this stuff about Coach prime and his mom. Like, huge. Do you ever, though, look at that and distinguish hate from, like, valid criticism? Do you. Do you ever listen to somebody that's being critical, you go, hey, any of this apply to me? Do I need to make a change here? Is that valid? Do you allow that to guide you at all, or no, why would I.
- [46:16]
Rob Dyrdek
Listen to my critics when my critics have critics? I'm gonna listen to a critic who has a line of critics. Ain't no way, because some of those people are criticizing you to just get your attention. The last thing I heard about attention, that you had to pay it. You got to pay attention. So that's a fee. That's gonna cost. So if you're not gonna pay that cost for my attention, I'm not gonna give it to you. Because my attention ain't free. My attention ain't free. My attention ain't free. You're gonna have to pay.
- [46:58]
Ed Mylett
You're gonna pay attention every time I do an interview. When I do an interview, coach, I always go, that'll make a good Instagram clip. We've had, like, 11 of these already. Like, in a good interview, you get, like, one. You're like, that's gonna be the clip. I don't even know what clip I'm gonna use in this thing right now. It's so damn good. What about your faith? I want before the interview gets too Far away. I, like, want to ask you about your faith. Like, I watched you as a player. I feel like there's just some point in your career and I don't. I'd like you to talk about when it was or what it. How it was. I mean, it certainly seems deeper to me now.
- [47:37]
Rob Dyrdek
Yeah, it is, because I will. That's why I tell people to be careful who you have to have as a role model, because most of us were models just playing a role. I'm just giving you the picture that you. That you wanted to see, because it's really not me. I'm not Prime Time. I'm Dion. You don't care about Dion because you care about prime. So I got to give you prime. But the thing about it, both of them has an expiration date, and it's not. They don't equate to one another. They're not going to die at the same time. One is going to die. The Persona is going to die much quicker than the person. So what you're trying to kill is the Persona, because you don't really know the person. And I got lost trying to satisfy you all with the Persona. And I began to be suicidal. I mean, I'm on the top of my game, on the top of the world. Several different commercials. And how in the world can I be suicidal? How in the world can I not want to be here? Well, I was going through a tremendous divorce, and my kids were stripped away from me. And those are the only two people that I felt like loved me in my whole life because it was genuine. Like, these are my kids. They came from me. I know they love me because I. I know you don't. I know you don't. I know you don't. You love what I'm capable of doing for you, but you don't love me. But you know why you don't love me? Because you don't know me. And let me go through this soliloquy so you understand right where we were, right where I was parked at the time. I'm in a 15,000 square foot house but never feeling at home. I have hundreds and hundreds of suits but I can't cover up the pain. I got 500 or more pair of shoes but I can't take a step in the right direction. Several cars parked in the driveway. Exotic from old 64 Chevys, but I ain't going nowhere. You mean I'm sleeping in between two and three women but nobody is satisfied. And I'm sleeping on a five to $10,000 bed, but ain't getting no rest. So you're going through all these emotions and all these challenges and you're just not happy. Like, I'm three for four and I'm still want to commit suicide after the game. So all this stuff came to a head where I finally had to get on my knees and say, lord, it take me, man, I can't do this no more. I, I can't, I can't do it. I, I can't do it. I can't stand it. I can't stand the life. And it's not that I've never smoked in my life. I've never been high, never drank, never tasted alcohol. Stop using profanity. When I was 19 years old. So it wasn't those vices. It was other vices, but it wasn't those vices. But, but I just didn't have peace and I didn't have joy. And I knew God was calling me, but I didn't want to be hypocritical because I, I, I despise that someone saying they this and not this. I despise that. So I was trying to clean up before I go to the Lord. It ain't no way you could clean up before you go to the Lord. You got to go to the Lord to get clean. I didn't know that. I didn't understand that. So finally, you know, after going through hell and child and trib TR tribulation and attempting to commit suicide, I had to surrender and give it all to him. That was the place. But you know what broke me, what almost broke me and hurt me? That when I came out and told the world about this is what I was going through, this is I was dealing with, they didn't believe me. I'm like, so you think I'm going to tell you all this? What's the game? I already got money. So what am I gaining? Like what? I already got fame. What am I gaining to tell you that I've accepted the Lord? I'm, I'm tired. I was broken. What am I gaining? And I wish somebody would have told me that my most critical people would have come from inside, not outside.
- [51:33]
Ed Mylett
The church.
- [51:34]
Rob Dyrdek
Folks, that was my most critical persons. Not the sinners. The sinners was like, hey man, God bless you, man. Tell me how you did it. Tell me how you stopped that Lamborghini from going 200. You know, tell me how you slowed everything down in life. Yeah, the church folks like, oh, ain't no way in the world he could do that. So no, no. What you're doing is on yourself. You're telling that if you had all these things that you couldn't do it. Because you're saying I can't, because you think about the things, because the things had me, I didn't have them.
- [52:05]
Ed Mylett
How do we become more fulfilled? I can tell you that I believe the pathway to fulfillment is by contributing to other people. Being in service to other people. Chasing your passion and your purpose in the service of other people leads to fulfillment. Let me tell you the pathway, I think, to contributing to other people and truly fulfilling your purpose. Because if you can match being happy with all the short term things you want to achieve in your life, achievement can be a destination. Achievement can be a level, achievement can be a promotion. It could be a certain amount of money, it be, could be an accomplishment, it could be a home, it could be whatever it is. Achievements make us happy. Contribution matched with achievement is fulfillment. And so I want you to take an inventory. The most fulfilled people I know use the gifts they were given in their life towards the service and contributing to other people. I want you to hear me, people say, I just don't know what my passion is. I don't know what my purpose is. Your purpose is often found through identifying what your giftedness is and then how you can use those gifts to serve other people. And so it's hard for most people to give themselves any credit. But let me tell you something. You were born with natural gifts that were given to you, that are special to you. You see the gifts of other people. See, certain gifts put you on tv. Good looks, unbelievable athletic ability, right? A great singing voice. These are the gifts that can put you on television. So most of us think those are the most important gifts in life, are only the ones that we see on television. See, and then we think because we might not possess those specific gifts, we are not gifted. Let me say to you very explicitly, you were born, and I know this, with unique, special gifts that are just yours. You were born for a reason. You were born to make a difference. When you were a little boy or a little girl, there was a time in your life where there was somebody who believed in you. They looked at you like you were special. They knew you were unique. Maybe it was a parent or a grandparent or a school teacher or a coach or an auntie or an uncle, but they looked at you a certain way and you just knew. They knew you were special. They saw what I call the Christ in you. They saw the gifts in you. And maybe as you Got a little bit older, you've forgotten what that feels like. But I can tell you it was the greatest feeling in the world. In fact, if you pictured that person's face right now that made you feel that way, you'd begin to almost get emotional because they made you see the gift in you. They may not have known what. What the gift was, but they made you feel special. Your uniqueness, your specialness is these gifts you were given. And by the way, be very aware of what they are. Your gifts could be your nurturing ability, your kindness, your intensity, your passion, your voice, your looks, your art skills, your ability to problem solve, your listening skills, your speaking skills, your peace, your faith, your concern, your family. Physical strength, right? Your ability to write, your ability to think, your ability to care, your ability to be there for people, your work ethic. There are literally thousands of gifts, and I promise you, if you begin to ask yourself some deep questions, you begin to understand your desire to help people, your intentions, your sense of humor, your patience level. You have all kinds of gifts that you were given, but there are two or three or four that are yours. And if you'll identify what those two or three or four gifts are, and you begin to use those gifts in the service of other people, you will be ultimately fulfilled. In my case, you know, I feel like my gift is that I was born with the ability to articulate. I was born with the ability to learn. I was born with the ability to just deeply care and believe in people. God was good enough to give me the ability to. To kind of communicate those words in a way that's easy to understand. And so I've taken some of the gifts, my couple, my two or three. I don't have 50. I'm not better than you, but I've sort of identified some of the gifts I have is I love people. I care about people. I'm pretty good at speaking, right? I want to make a difference. I intend to serve. And so I've taken those skills and I've used them to serve other people in my life. And it fulfills me. It's not working to me. It makes me fulfilled. My house may make me happy short term, my jet might. But I can tell you what fulfills me is making a difference in the lives of other people. And it's what will fulfill you as well. It's dropping this notion. As I've said in other audios, you are not your possessions. You are not your accomplishments. You are not what other people say you are good, bad, or indifferent. You are not those things. And you are not what you look like. You are, are your gifts. You are these two or three or four things. This is the basis of who you are, are these gifts. This is the true you. And when you begin to do this, when you begin to utilize those gifts in service of other people, you become inspirational. Yes, You. You inspire people. See, the root of the word inspire is to be in spirit. When you are in spirit and serving people with the gifts you were given. Mike, who's filming this right now, one of his great gifts is his patience, is his artful eye, is his ability to see the right setting like we did today when we're shooting here. It's his concern to make me look good. It's the pride he takes in his work. These are some of his natural gifts. And now he's found them and we've partnered together. His gift and my gift and the gift of my team to serve you. This will begin to fulfill you in your life. All of you have the gifts. And so when you begin to identify what they are in the service of other people, you will begin to change your life. That is who you truly are. That is when you begin to experience those emotions that serve you, that begin to transform your life. If you want to be happier and if you want to be more fulfilled, go achieve. Go accomplish. Go chase those things, but do things every day that feed these emotions that you want, not the ones you don't want. Root out the emotions you don't want. Pursue and chase the ones you do and begin to use those gifts to serve other people and fulfill your purpose in being here in the world. I'm going to give you 10 things that I want you to be more of. I want you to embody more of in your life. I want you to take an inventory of the man or woman. If you could be more of these 10 things, they will deliver to you more of these emotions. Number one. I want you to be unique. I want you to be special. See, I believe the opposite of bravery is to conform. Conformity is the opposite of bravery. You don't need to be like anybody else. Stop trying to be a part of the group. Be unique. Be special. Be you. Celebrate the uniqueness that is you. Yeah, you may take some criticism. You probably take it in the past. Every time you've tried to be yourself, you've taken a little criticism. But I can promise you one of the gateways to more of these positive emotions is to be unique. Be special. Be you. Number two. Be love. Yes. Be love. I know that may sound corny, especially to some of you guys that are listening to this, but just be more loving. I think you'll find the more love you put out into the world, and I don't mean this in some fluffy way, I'm serious, the more you love people, the more you smile, the more you truly love in life, the more you get it back in your life. Number three, be truth. Just honor your truth more often and even in the difficulty times, be honest and truthful with people. Number four, be kind. One of the rarest things in the world today is just a kind person. Just taking the time to be more kind to people. We need more kindness in the world. The more kind you are to other people, the more those emotions come flooding your way. Number five, be beautiful. And I mean it, be beautiful. Begin to celebrate your beauty. I know for some of us that's difficult because we're aware of all the things about us that aren't beautiful. The more you just be beautiful, I could tell you, the more you begin to accept you the way you are, that you're perfect as you are. It doesn't mean we don't want to look better, doesn't mean we want to improve our condition, be healthier, be stronger, look better. But the bottom line is, if we can't begin to love how we look now, we're not going to love how we look at any point. We're never going to love it. Just be more beautiful now. Number six, be moving. You must always be moving your body. See, the great emotions come from us when we're moving our body. See, emotions are physical as well. They're physical thing. You know how you feel when you're working out or you're in that special moment with that special someone. And privacy. You're moving your body at that time, aren't you? Right? Laughter is a movement, right? See, emotions are movements. It's a state of being. The more you're breathing deeper, the more you're moving your body. Moving your body creates positive emotions. Stagnation. Laying down, hunched over all these emotions, sitting at your desk too long every single day, laying in bed, laying on the couch, not moving, driving in the car is when all the negative emotions hit. You'll find that when you're moving, running, moving your body, exercising, just getting in a peak state, being conscious of your posture and your physiology and moving yourself, you'll find it's almost impossible to experience the negative emotions when you're moving and the positive ones come flooding in. Number seven, be growing as we've talked about previously either growing or dying in your life. A growing person is experiencing the positive emotions of life. A person who's not growing, they start to experience depression and fatigue and fear and anxiety. Be growing all the time. It's a gateway to all the positive emotions in life. Number eight, be silly. Be playful. See, you were the happiest probably when you were a little, little child, when you were playful and you didn't care what everybody thought about, you start to have more childlike enthusiasm in your life. Be silly. Be willing to look bad and look goofy. The happiest people have more childlike emotions, more childlike enthusiasm. We all get older and we get buttoned up and we want to look a certain way and present our certain selves and think there's a way we're supposed to act all the time. And we lose the inner child. And from there we lose the emotions a child gets to experience. Number nine, be forgiving. Forgive people. It will set you free and open you up to all the positive emotions that are lost. If there are people you need to forgive, do it. It's your lack of forgiveness that's holding you back from getting these positive emotions. It's holding on to this thing you're holding over somebody even though you think they may deserve it if you don't forgive them. You've blocked yourself. You've cheated yourself from all the joy, all the peace, all the passion in your life as you're holding on and not forgiving somebody. That lack of forgiveness has given you the anxiety and the stress and it's blunting your access to the best emotions. Be forgiving. And then number 10, be courageous. Be bold. The most courageous people in life experience the greatest emotions. They take risks. They overcome adversity. They put themselves in uncomfortable situations. They show courage. They step in when needed. They're people's heroes in their life. They do things they're afraid of on a very regular basis. Courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is taking action in the presence of fear. I promise you, the more courageous you are, the more you are opening yourself to the best emotions in life. These 10 things, these 10 steps, these 10 ways of being, are gateways to the positive emotions in our life. And when you combine that with identifying your gifts and using them in the service of other people and being conscious of wanting these emotions your entire life, life is going to transform. 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Even if the bottle's empty, you just pay for shipping. Start your 90 day free trial today at just thrive health.com and use promo code ED to save 20 on your first bottle. That's just thrive health.com promo code ED these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease or condition. These statements and information are not a subst or an alternative to seeking care from your health care providers. Very short intermission here folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. What ends up happening? Gandhi has this great quote that I've been really working on lately. Gandhi said, I will not let you walk through my mind with your dirty feet. And too many of you are letting the people around you walk through your mind with their dirty feet and it's polluting your brain, it's polluting your thoughts, it's creating negative belief systems, limiting belief systems. And you know what? Your own confidence, your own strength, your own self esteem is going to come from you. You have to understand something. When you try something in your life, okay, or you attempt anything in your life, you're either going to become wise or you're going to become wounded. And too many people, once they start to try, become wounded. The failure wounds them, the setback wounds the criticism wounds them their own. By the way, sometimes the people walking through your mind with their dirty feet are you and your own thoughts. And by the way, the reason I know this is I very much have done this myself. The guy walking through my mind most of the time with his dirty feet is this dude right here. And I've learned something. I don't have to believe everything I think. In fact, I don't anymore. Most of the stuff I think all the studies say, I've said this in other podcasts, 80 to 90% of our thoughts are negative. These aren't my thoughts. Those aren't God's thoughts. Those are somehow very, very wounded man's thinking, not a wise man. And I'll ask myself that when I have these thoughts. Is this a wise man's thoughts or a wounded man's thoughts? You ask yourself that. These negative thoughts that you're having, these limiting thoughts that you're having, is that the wise woman's thoughts or the wounded woman's thoughts? And if it's the wounded woman, stop listening to her and start talking to her. Sometimes in life you got to stop listening to yourself so much and start talking to yourself. And it's all your responsibility. Listen, it's not called friend esteem or stranger esteem or mom and dad esteem. It's called self esteem for a reason. Because you have to be the one to believe it and listen to me. The fact that you're listening to my podcast or watching it means this. You're starting to grow. And maybe you've been growing for quite a while. And by the way, if you're outgrowing people, it makes them very uncomfortable with themselves. And then because they're uncomfortable with themselves, they become dream stealers. Because here's what happens. You getting bigger makes them feel smaller. And so the consequence, what a lot of us do, is we decide to shrink ourselves and get smaller so that they can feel bigger or safer with us around. Let me say that to you again. You getting Bigger makes them feel smaller. And because you're a good person, whether it's your, your boyfriend or girlfriend, your spouse, your friends, your parents, whoever it is, what you do because you're a good person is instead of still getting bigger, you decide you will get smaller so they can feel bigger or safer with you. And what ends up happening is you shrink your dreams and we shrink our lives, we shrink our energy, we shrink our capacity to fit in and we make all these other people around us comfortable. And what I want you to do is I want you to make some people uncomfortable in your life. There's nothing wrong with making people feel uncomfortable. And if you're going to do it, see, to me that's courage. Courage is being willing to make other people uncomfortable. Remember this. Sometimes I had to say this to my family, pardon my progress, but I'm going to be making progress over here, right? And eventually they might get on board and they might not get on board. But I want to know that at the end of my life when it's over, that I've given it everything I've got. That I didn't shrink myself because I was a coward. I didn't shrink myself to please small minded people around me. That my capacity to grow, my capacity to read, my. My total commitment to a personal development program. My total commitment to a self improvement program. I started out as a very young man in my early 20s with absolutely no self esteem, no confidence, no communication ability whatsoever. And I started the journey of self discovery, self improvement and personal development. I started. I was a terrible reader, but I found myself at least I could read a book a month and then it got to a book a week and I got up to where I was reading sometimes 50, 60, 70, 80 books a year. And these were like mentors to me. When I read books, it's like this author is personally speaking to me and mentoring me, pouring into me. Man, if there was a podcast like mine back then, my gosh, I'd be glued. I would be glued to, I mean to brag, but like I would be glued to it. There's this great Chinese proverb that says, if you want to know the road ahead, ask those coming back. And to be able to listen to my Thursday episodes of the People I Interview on Tuesdays. These are people who have the directions because they're coming back. I think I have some of them. But I know this when I started out because I didn't have a lot of confidence, man, every once in a while the cowardly me would come back and I would shrink my life, shrink my dream, shrink my belief, right? Those voices were. That those dirty feet were running through my mind. And then a few other people had their dirty feet doing it to me as well. And between the rest of of us, between them and me, it was like a stampede in my mind all the time. And I didn't want to make people uncomfortable. I still to this day, at 53 years old, I'm a people pleaser. I don't like to offend, I don't like to hurt people. I. If I have strife with somebody in my life, like, I can't sleep until I fixed it. I'm just wired that way. Many of you are. But I've learned that if I've made a mistake in how I've treated somebody or spoken to them, then it should bother me and I should fix it. But if the mistake I've made is trying to do something great with my life, the mistake I've made is trying to change my family tree forever. The mistake I've made is trying to be happier and grow. If the mistake I've made is trying to give to other people and contribute and create great memories in my life, then guess what? That's not a mistake. And I'm not apologizing for that. I've got one life, you've got one life. And it's time we have the courage to get after it and take the lonely road and not have this cowardice, this cowardly way about us where we just conform to what everybody else is doing. And I can tell you, I think I know where it comes from. I think it comes, believe it or not, all the way back when we were little, little kids in our coloring books. Remember how much we were trained over and over again to color between the lines? And I was always a terrible color. I'm left handed. I just, I've got no coordination skills. This way you go look at my old coloring book, they're just terrible. But we're trained as children. Color between the lines. Sarah, color between the lines. Bob, color between the lines, stay between the lines. And we're over and over and over. This is reinforced to us to stay between the lines. And there's a lot of great things about school, but coloring between the lines, sitting in the same way, fold your hand, all these things, what ends up happening as we begin to get older, we literally start to only color between the lines in our life. We don't want to get outside the lines. And I'm going to say something to you all great people Color outside the lines. All the people you admire, what do you admire about them? They colored outside the lines in their life. They didn't stay a conformist. They didn't stay with some predetermined picture. So here's what a coloring book is. Here's the picture. Now you just fill in the one I gave you. Color between the lines. And that's what most people do in their life. The world hands them. Here's your picture. This is what you get. This is your life. This is the one you're handed. Stay between the lines. Don't you veer outside those lines. Don't you get outside of there. And what happens is that we have this thing that's now wired into us once we're adults. Oh, my gosh. I'm outside the lines. I better get back. I'm outside the lines. I better get back. And it becomes something in life where I. I've never been out here before. I need to come back. I'm. I'm misbehaving. I'm going to get in trouble. I'm not doing what I was trained to do. This isn't what I do. And I can tell you that's why there's so few people in life that win. But I can tell you the decision they've made. They've made the decision that they're not coloring within the lines anymore. So my challenge to you today is to have courage is not to conform, but to create, is to decide in your life that you're not playing within these lines. Somebody else handed to you, that you're going to design your own life with God, your own story, your own pictures. And that you're going to pick up a new pen, a new crayon. You're going to start coloring a whole new picture of your life. And when you begin to do that, it's going to be uncomfortable at first. And by the way, some of you have said, ed, I've done it. And you know what? Now that I'm listening, say, I'm back between the dang lines again. I was outside. I had some failures and setbacks, and I ran back within the picture they gave me. You've got to stop this tendency of running back within the picture that everybody gave you. Shrinking your dreams down, shrinking. Shrinking your life down to fit between these lines. Some artificial lines that everybody, some strange, a random person, I guess, gave you. But I could tell you this. I don't believe you were created to stay within those lines. I don't think you yet have any idea what your potential is and your capacity. But what I can tell you is you begin to expand your capacity and you start really getting out there. You'll be surprised how far you can go either people that I know that are successful, myself included, if you think I am. For me to look back now how far I've come, my gosh, it's amazing. You'd have told me all these different things would happen. It blows my mind. But the reason that that happened is I finally started building a habit of I'm not shrinking to make you comfortable. And by the way, I'm not going to shrink to make me comfortable. I've got incredibly comfortable at being uncomfortable. In fact, this is probably not great to admit, but when I go too long just kind of laying around being comfortable, I start to get uncomfortable. I start to get uncomfortable. Not doing difficult things. People ask me all the time, why do you do cold plunges in the morning? Is it the anti inflammatory properties? Is it? I don't know. No, not really. In fact, there's some data that says the longer you do it, the less that has an impact. I don't even know if that's right, but that's why I do it anyway. The reason that I do it is it's hard. The reason I do it is it's difficult. Successful people, happy people, do difficult things. Unhappy people, and I believe unsuccessful people have a tendency to not do difficult things. There's this great story I my firm at one time we sponsored Carl Edwards. He was a NASCAR driver, very successful one for a long time. And I asked him about driving a nascar and I'll never forget what he told me. I said, what's the hardest part? And he goes, well, there's obviously the physical toll that it takes on you, Ed, and, and obviously the mechanics of knowing how to drive the car correctly and all those things that I don't understand of being a top athlete in any sport. But he said the most difficult part is when you're driving and there's a crash in front of you and you're doing 150 miles an hour and all you can see is a smoke cloud. All you can see is a smoke cloud. And he said, and what you got to do is drive right through that cloud. You got to drive right through it. And he goes, and it's scary because you don't know what's on the other side. You could be going headlong into a car that's already crashed at 150, 180 miles an hour. Bam. And you don't know. And you got to drive through the smoke anyway. I never thought about that before. He goes, oh, yeah. I mean, there's a wreck in front of you and there's ever the smokes everywhere. He goes, you just got to drive right through it. And he said, the other thing is, when there's an accident. And he goes, you know, you're up against the wall and you're driving. He goes, your tendency when you're driving, you got. You're doing 150 or 180 or whatever they do the walls a millimeter away. He goes, you can't look at the wall, because when you look at it, you drive right into it. You end up gravitating right into it. He said, you got to keep looking ahead, Ed. You can't flinch when there's an accident in front of you. You can't flinch where there's smoke and you can't see what's on the other side. You got to drive right through it. And I remember it firing me up thinking, man, that's life. Man, that's success. Sometimes you can't see where you're going. You got to drive right through it, not knowing what's on the other side, and have the faith and the confidence. And when you get to the other side, you will figure it out, that there'll be a blessing and a gift, that you'll be protected. And that's what I mean by the conformity is cowardice. Right? It takes courage to go through that smoke cloud. And then you got to keep your eye on the prize. When you're driving 150, 180 miles an hour, an inch away from the wall, don't look at the wall. Don't look at the wall. Look ahead where you're going. And so many of us in life, even once we get it going, we start looking at the wall. I know I'm going to crash. I know I'm going to crash. It's so close. And we start looking at the things we don't want, and we manifest them. We literally. I believe thoughts are magnets, and what you think about most regularly, you attract to yourself. I believe that. I believe it. Especially if you do it repetitively, especially if I can be candid with you, and I may sound outside the lines for you, but let me just say this. I love being outside the lines. The more you begin to become successful and vibrate at a high frequency, the more you really need to protect your thoughts. Because when you're vibrating the highest frequency, you tend to Draw things to you even more rapidly and more regularly when you're at that frequency, okay? And so it's important that you not look at the wall in your life. That wall is an artificial line in the coloring book of your life. And when you begin to look at it, you decide to conform or hit it. But when you look ahead at where you're going, when you're focused in the present moment, See, I could tell you this. The other reason I love to cold plunge is it's so dadgum cold, it forces me to be fully present in that moment. You get into a cold plunge, you can't be worrying about your problems in that moment. You are fully focused on getting through those three to five minutes or however long you sit in there. For some of us that are crazy people, it's some of the few minutes every day we are fully present, right? I could promise you if you do a 150 or 180 into a smoke cloud, you're not worried about your grocery list at that time. You're going right in there, fully present in the moment. And it's the most alive you ever feel in your life. See? Total focus. You'll feel the most alive in your life. If you look back at your life, some of the most chaotic, busy, difficult times where you're happiest, and you may not have realized it at the time, but when you're in college, cramming for finals, and I ask you to go back to those days, all the stress, you had a job and you're going through college. Let's say if you had that, some of the happiest times in your life, Some of you mamas, those days where you're eight months of your pregnancy and you was one of the difficult times in your life, yet one of the most blessed times in our life. See, when it's really busy and we feel the most out of control, we're driving through that smoke cloud. We're coloring outside those lines when we're the happiest and when it's easy and cruise control and we're just kind of shrinking our life down to conform like everybody else, it's when we're the most miserable. That's why there's this thing that's inside of you right now saying, I'm supposed to be somebody. I'm supposed to do something great with my life. I'm not exactly settled where I am right now. You're not settled right now. You don't feel settled in your spirit. You don't feel settled in your Spirit because you know there's more abundant faith for you. You know there's more people to help. You know, there's a dream and a life waiting for you out there. Even if you're in a great one right now. You've got this sense about you that there's another place for you to go, there's more people for you to help, there's more people for you to serve. If you're a believer that you want to serve God's kingdom in the biggest possible way, you can, whatever that thing is for you. And I can tell you I know where that lies and that lies outside the lines. And so today I hope you decide that you or no one else is ever going to walk through your mind with their dirty feet and that you've decided that you're not going to conform and that you're going to do something awesome with your life. I'm giving you full permission. In fact, I'm begging you, color outside the lines because that's where all the people that you want to help are waiting for you. My dear friend that's here today is the co founder of mastermind.com along with his partner and friend and my friend Tony Robbins. Dean Graziosi must be here today. So Dean, welcome to the show, brother.
- [80:44]
Deion Sanders
It's always so good to be here with you.
- [80:46]
Ed Mylett
By the way, that leads me to kind of my first question. We're going to talk about the event quite a bit. And by the way, guys, you get a chance to have an event with Dean and Tony which by the way, I know they're not going to do a lot more of these, you know, take advantage of it. We'll talk about the event as we go forward. But these are. If you'd have told me growing up I could get access to a Dean Grazi or Tony Robins and just sign up and I'm there. I'd be like, are you kidding me? I mean it'd be something. Be an automatic no brainer. And the reason is, Dean is my first question. You know, Tony talks a lot about sort of the science of achievement and the art of fulfillment. And when I look at you, I look at someone who over the years has gotten a lot better at the art form of fulfillment and so many things about social media right now. Our hustle and grind culture, which you and I, no two people hustle and grind more than you and I. But I'm not so, so sure, so sure that they're. I mean, I think there's a lot of success happening but I don't know how much fulfillment's happening in people's lives. And so if I open up with a question and be. What would you say to somebody who feels like they're maybe having some success but they're not fulfilled?
- [81:51]
Deion Sanders
Ah, what a great question and kind of why we're leaning down the. The road of the game has changed because I think it really has. Because, you know, success without fulfillment is probably the biggest failure of them.
- [82:03]
Ed Mylett
All.
- [82:04]
Deion Sanders
Right, I see. You know, you and I do have a lot of history, Ed, and we have a lot of similar backgrounds. My dad's still alive at age 87 years old, and I watched my dad chase a lot of things in his Life. And at 87, I watch him. He's really sad deep down, and I give him love on a regular basis and take care of him. But he's sad because he chased success even though it didn't really come to him. But he missed out on fulfillment. He missed out on being connected. My sister and him haven't talked in 20 years. He didn't talk to his brothers and sisters. I'm not trying to get on a personal note, but I get to witness with a man who's at 87, who's one of the smartest people I've ever met, my dad. And I watch when he talks to me and he looks in my eyes and he'll tell me he loves me. Now, he never told me as a kid, you know, old school, tough Italian guy from the east coast, but he tells me now, and his eyes fill up with water, Ed, 100 times, 100% of the times him and I talk now, we're together, you know, at least every week. And I just watched a life without feeling fulfillment. And I get to be Tony Robbins partner. I get to do this for a living. And I get so many. I see so many people chasing success. And one of the things I want to share is when you're chasing success, especially through a career and a career mindset, we're never taught the art of fulfillment. We're never taught that we could find something with purpose. We never taught that we could be passionate about what we do. We're tired. Taught to balance work and play, work and life, right? We're supposed to say, you know, shut it off at 5 o' clock. How does that work, Ed? Do you walk in the door at 5:30 and go, okay, honey, I'm leaving at the door? No. And the only reason we're taught that is because most of the time we're taught to do something we really don't love in a career we really don't like, and then we're taught to shut it off and be somebody different at home and maybe watch football on a Sunday and have a couple scotches every night to just numb it, right? Rather than work, life, integration. I think Covid had a big shot in the arm of this is. People were realizing, hey, I'm doing okay financially, but I don't like my life. I'm not happy, I'm not fulfilled. I'm looking around corners, I see somebody at dinner, and they're smiling. I think they got a better life than me because inside I'm miserable. And I think that's. I think that's one of the things you do so well, Ed and I loved, loved listening to every word of your last book. I mean, because I know you so well, like I said. But helping people realize when you can find that balance of a career or a business and working on the best version of you, that's where life is. And I think that's why Tony and I have been, you know, screaming from mountaintops is this is the time, because we don't get a second chance. And maybe it's because I'm in my 50s, mid-50s, that and Tony's in his mid-60s. It's like we just want to shake people and say, don't settle. You can have both.
- [84:47]
Ed Mylett
You know, what the. The thing about what you've been doing, too, which is really teaching people how to take their knowledge and. And express it, and they can monetize it, but they can also serve people when they do it. And one of the pathways to fulfillment for me, and you can talk about the event as you answer this question, but I'd like you to answer the question directly, too, is that I think if you're not feeling fulfilled, perhaps it's that you're not really becoming the fullest expression of yourself or the expression of yourself that you want to be. And I think so many people, you know, maybe they've got a little bit of money, maybe they don't even have it. They think, well, if I get the money, I'll feel fulfilled, or if I get the relationship, I'll feel fulfilled. What I found as I've gotten older, if I look back at my last 30 years, different things make me happy, but one of them that almost always delivers fulfillment for me is when I feel that I'm excited, expressing the versions of myself that are the most beautiful, that are the most proud, that are the most giving, that are the most generous. And even the parts of me that I'm the most afraid to express, I find bring me the most fulfillment in my life. And I wonder if that lack of fulfillment is correlated to a lack of expression of who somebody truly is. What they know, what they feel, what they believe, what they value, what they stand for. What do you think?
- [86:06]
Deion Sanders
Such a good way to frame it. I think you're spot on. I want to ask you something. The American Dream. Do you think I brought that up? We had a team meeting, and everybody under 35, we had a meeting with about 12 of us. So I want to ask your opinion on this. I brought up the American dream. I just brought it up. I said, do you think it still exists? Is it still alive? And what does it mean? And I have to say, the people on the team under 35 is like, oh, no, you know, I don't know if the American Dream, that might be controversial. And people over 50 are like, yeah, that is the thing our parents and grandparents came to this country for or worked hard for. I had never seen something so, you know, opposite. And the younger kids on my team, I say, younger kids that are 35, they're like, I don't think you should bring that up. I was like, wow, is that where we are as a society, that we can't talk about the American dream? Because my definition. I'd love to know yours, Ed. My thought of the American dream, wherever you live in the world, is living into your full potential. Like, knowing you're meant for more. Right. But actually doing something in your power to achieve it. Right? And I think. I don't know how that could have gotten a bad name. Maybe. Maybe I'm blind or naive to it, but I think what you're saying is like, a life lived without tapping into that full potential you have, or at least trying, I think is the saddest life ever. And to me, it just looks like, hey, fight for it. Do whatever it takes. You want to call it the American dream? You want to say you're living into your full potential? Whatever it takes. I just know if you leave. If you leave gas in the tank at the end of your life, right? I love. I think I watched you say one time, if you had a cell phone at the end of your life and God played you a video of the man you could have been or the woman you could have been, won't that be the most horrific thing on the planet?
- [87:59]
Ed Mylett
And, yeah, I do think that's sad. I got to tell you, the version of the American Dream for me, to me it means freedom, and that's freedom to express yourself, be yourself. And if those things, like I have a sister who I think is incredibly fulfilled. Andrea My middle sister, I think all three of my sisters are. But my middle sister, I'll tell you about her, Dean, really quickly. She had lost her vision many years ago. Most people know that she had gone blind. She's diabetic, retinopathy. And so she had lost her vision. And my sister doesn't make a lot of money. She's a Christian school teacher. But I think she has a very rich life and a very fulfilled life, particularly now that she can see again and she can teach again. And the reason is, is that she chose something that was the fullest expression of her soul, of her spirit, of what she wanted to be. And to me, the American dreams got conflated the last few years. And the reason it's. It's a controversial topic is the American dream now appears to be about wealth, affluence, influence, materialism. And we've made that the dream. And because that looks like the dream through social media and reality shows and these different things, the controversial part of it is most people believe those things are reserved for a very select group of people, which in point of fact, may have some validity to it. Not everybody's going to be worth $100 million. Not everybody's going to fly private. And when we've made that the prize, it becomes controversial because not everybody thinks they could get that. And by the way, the truth is, not everybody wants that, but everybody wants to live authentically. Everybody wants freedom to be and express who they are, to create, to build something, to give something. To me, that's the American dream, and I do believe that's alive. But I believe we've conflated what it means. In other words, if it doesn't pay you 5 million bucks a year, that's not the dream. And for some people who are listening to this or watching it, their dream is the material part. And I think there's a freedom to express it that way as well. But I think a lot of people feel pressured. Like, I don't want all these things everybody else wants, but I'm supposed to want them. And now I'm conflicted internally because I don't truly want all the material things. And because I don't truly want it, I'm probably not going to produce it because you have to be obsessed with whatever you want in your life. And it's not a real obsession to me. And so to me, what's happened even to me recently is like I've been willing to say, you know what, those were my other dreams. I have new dreams now. I've re audited my life and what matters to me now. And it's okay that those things change. Here's the other thing. It's okay for in life to change your mind to say, I used to believe that I no longer do. There are things I used to teach, I don't teach anymore because I've changed.
- [90:37]
Deion Sanders
I get it.
- [90:38]
Ed Mylett
And so in my mind, yes, I believe it's alive. I just think the real dream should be the fullest expression of your soul in your heart. If that dream means you want to live in a cabin in the mountains and explore nature all day long, or serve in your church full time or work in a non profit or make $100 million or 10, teach something like what we're going to talk about in a minute, that, that you believe is valuable, that can improve other people's lives. Like these are things that I think we need to create a space again in the world that says, what's your dream? Not your parents, not your sisters, not social medias, and not even what yours was five years ago. Five years ago. I mean, listen for me and I'll shut up and I'll ask you this. 25 years ago, one of my major dreams would be incredibly wealthy. To be comfortable, to take care of my family, to be financially independent, to never. My dream was less to be incredibly wealthy. Better said, I didn't want to be poor. I didn't want to. I didn't want to struggle financially. I didn't want to not be there for my family. Well, now that that's sort of been achieved, it's not really financial success is not a major dream of mine. Contribution is.
- [91:47]
Rob Dyrdek
Here's a clip of Ed Mylett appearing.
- [91:49]
Ed Mylett
On the Heavy Checklist podcast. This book is heavy in the sense that you say things like, winning is more fun than fun is fun. Yeah. So when I first heard you say that and I read, took me some time to process because it seems like a simple statement. Right. Like it seems very like, you know, yeah, winning is great. What does winning really mean and what is fun? And I think in your book you start to dive into. You've watched so much, certain friends and associates go this way in the pursuit of fun and happiness and success. Yeah. And it didn't work out quite how they thought it would. Well. And so have you. So I say winning is more fun than fun. What is Winning. Winning is just reaching your potential at whatever it is that you're doing. Right. And I've had all kinds of friends in my life just go for short term stuff. You know, they want to go to the club, they want to go have fun, they want to chill out. And to me that might sound good for like 15 or 20 minutes. Minutes. But to me, winning, reaching my potential, by the way, winning and having fun, like maxing out my laughter like we were doing before we started here today, like every area of my life, I do. The reason I wrote the book is really simple. My dad died and when it happened, I learned all these lessons from my dad. I know a lot about how the brain works. I know a lot about the spiritual stuff, the physical stuff. And it occurred to me, man, like I'm next. Yeah. I don't know when my life ends, but I know I'm the next my let man to go. And so I wanted to write a book for my kids and my great grandkids that this is what I know about being happy and successful. And one of the things I know is that chasing short term fleeting fun in every area, even our scriptures all tell us this. The cheap stuff of life, the cheap things that are easy to get are hollow. And the hard things. I have a chapter in the book called One More Inconvenience, Doing inconvenient, difficult things that build character. Yeah. Is where real fun is. Absolutely. And, and to me, it fires me up to know that because we're in a culture now that doesn't celebrate that anymore, we're in a culture that celebrates cheap short term fun, whatever you want to call it. Well, I think fun and fulfillment were are synonymous here. This is the type of fun that we're talking about. Feeling fulfilled is fun. Yeah. Going out, partying on the weekend, Weekend that may be fun for a minute. Right. And you might have a great weekend and then whatever else happens after that. But fulfillment, influence for good and accomplishing things that other people haven't accomplished before. Yeah. That's real fun. It is real fun. And the other thing is this. You learn something about yourself. This may sound really serious for this, but Napoleon Hill says in Think and Grow Rich. By the way, I love Think and Grow Rich. Other than scriptures, it's my favorite book. But the truth is you don't just think and get rich. Right. There's stuff you got to do. So I wanted to write a book about what do you think and what do you do congruently that produce a result. But one thing I love that he says is. He says if you can survive the temporary. The temporary pain, the temporary issue, you're going through that on the other side of that pain, you get introduced to your other self.
- [94:43]
Dean Graziosi
Oh, yeah.
- [94:44]
Ed Mylett
And that other self produces another life, which is more fun. Yeah. And so for me, it's. No matter who's listening to this or right now are watching it, listen, you might be going through something temporary right now. Okay? It's painful, it's difficult. You're having a setback. You're not on your A game right now. Everything in life is temporary. Being other than our souls. Being with my dad, I was literally holding my father's hand when he took his last breath. And it occurred to me, even in those moments, like, wow, even our bodies are temporary. Nothing you're going through is permanent. Yet most people start making permanent decisions, contemporary conditions in their lives, because they don't have the tools, the thoughts and the actions to take. And I'm like, I need to write a book. Humans need to know these things.
- [95:25]
Rob Dyrdek
This is the Ed Milan Show.