← THE ED MYLETT SHOW
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- [00:03]
Fallon Taylor
Kids, they grow up so fast. One day they're taking their first steps, and the next they don't fit into the tiny sneakers they took them in. You blink your eyes and their princess dress is two sizes too small. And their dinosaur backpack isn't cool anymore. But don't cry because they're growing up. Smile because you can profit off of it. For real. There are a bunch of parents on depop looking for the stuff your kid just grew out of. Download depop to start selling.
- [00:37]
Ed Mylett
This is the Ed Mylett Show. Hey, everyone. Welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now, on with the show. Welcome back to the show, everybody. So the young man I'm gonna introduce to you is. He's like a second son to me. I'm honored when he calls me dad. He's one of the greatest fighters in the world in the ufc, but he's really one of the greatest people that I've ever met. I love him dearly. He's a good man. He knows how to be successful. And so tonight, the podcast is really about two things. For those of you listening, we're going to talk about this huge fight he's up got upcoming on June 29th with Conor McGregor. We're going to talk about that fight. But for those of you that aren't fight fans, we're going to spend the majority of the podcast not just talking about that fight, but talking about winning, preparing mindset, preparation. And so if you're a fight fan, this is an exclusive peek into this fight. And if you're not a fight fan, it's not going to matter because we're going to talk all the time, as we always do on the show, about things you can take notes on and apply to your own life. So June 29th, the great Michael Chandler, Conor McGregor. My guest today is my son from another, I don't know, son. You say son from another mother, is that right? I guess so. I don't know. He's my son. Michael, welcome to the show.
- [01:59]
Michael Chandler
What's up, dad? Man, it's. Thank you for the kind intro.
- [02:03]
Ed Mylett
You're.
- [02:03]
Michael Chandler
You are the man.
- [02:04]
Ed Mylett
Is there a part of you that has imposter syndrome? If you're being candid with the audience, that you do come from humble beginnings, you have had ups and downs. You are, you know, coming off of, you know, you haven't had a six fight win streak even Right now, if we're being candid, right? So is there a part of you that has to overcome these mental demons, so to speak, of believing you belong, believing you can win? That I think most people struggle with. Or have you passed that stage of your life?
- [02:34]
Michael Chandler
I think I definitely still have a. A certain degree of it, but I think. I think I've gotten to the point where it's been revealed to me enough through, through life, the course of life, that the older you get, the more people you come into contact with, the more. The more people you train with or you're in business with, or you watch their work ethic or you watch how they live their lives, both in front of the camera, behind the camera, behind closed doors, in front of, you know, in front of the public, and you start to really look around and take stock and think, you know what? I do think that the Golden Diamonds was. Was. Was reserved for God's people, not the devil's bunch. You know, I do think that the good among us are supposed to go out and capture those things. And before, it used to be like, yeah, but you don't deserve it. You don't, you know, you don't deserve that. And if you do get that, well, what's going to happen? Maybe, maybe you're going to start rubbing people the wrong way. And I think I've gotten over that and realized, man, if you don't have a bunch of fruit on the back of your cart, you can't pass it out to people. If you've got nothing on your cart, you can't pass it out to people. And I do think I have. I have a duty to be successful because I can then use it to change people's lives, where until I got to a certain point, it was like, well, I'm a little bit afraid. You actually were the first person I heard you talked about the thermometer, right? And I was that guy. Like, I'm okay with the thermometer getting to here, but I'm a little nervous if it gets too high. And that. That thermometer just keeps getting higher and higher and higher, and I'm getting okay with it. And each time. So I do think I have a little bit of a degree of that, as, you know, once again, you keep leveling up. Every time you level up now, you're into a new realm. So of course there's a little bit of it. But you say, wait a second, I've been here before. Let me watch how this plays out. And at the end of the day, when I lay my head on the pillow at night. I know that I deserve it. I'm the one of those guys who deserves to. To go and capture that because of the way that I live my life.
- [04:27]
Ed Mylett
That's exactly right. You've earned this. And by the way, everyone, a little bit of everything in moderation is actually good. So a little bit of imposter syndrome keeps you, what you see in this young man right here, humble, keeps you training hard, remind you, I better outwork this dude because maybe I don't have everything they have. A lot of imposter syndrome will cause your thermometer to turn the air conditioner on and you'll cool your life back down. So a little bit of it is not. You don't have to eradicate all of your imposter syndrome. You have to eradicate that. It's your dominant thought. But to have that in the back a little bit is not all that bad. I have it, which is what causes me to prepare for a speech or a podcast. It's what's caused me to save my money, because I don't believe all my press clippings. I don't believe I'm always going to win. Everything's entitled to me. And so it's a healthy thing to some extent. Let me ask you this. I was watching some fights, you know, preparing for, you know, our work, and. And my son's like, dad, these guys are so good. And, you know, I've. I've hit bags and spar and, you know, all that part of my background. I said, max, the different thing that you don't realize because it looks like a video game when you watch people fight, is they're getting hit and still throwing punches back at the same time. That's the one thing, I think when people watch any sort of combat, whether it's Mikey sport and boxing or yours, they just underestimate how difficult it is to absorb punishment and return it. It's one thing to just dole out punishment into a bag, right? Or to hit, you know, to hit mitts. It's a very different thing. And that's really. I told my son, I said, max, that's the. The game of life. The game of life is everything looks good. At the seminar, when you read the book or listen to the podcast, it's sort of like these offensive strategies. But the people that I've seen win, and I want you to talk about this in fighting it in your life. The people that I've seen win, they have this very special ability to absorb A punch and still throw back. And that's the separator in life, and it certainly is in sports as well. So just speak to that, Mike. I mean, metaphorically, you do it in there. And by the way, you may want to be the greats at all time at doing that. This is a dude who almost out on his feet, can still knock people out better than anybody that's ever probably been in the sport, or at least one of them. But what about that fact of life and actually in the sport, literally. Yeah.
- [06:45]
Michael Chandler
I mean, it's very interesting because I do think metaphorically, right, There's. There's a lot of similar similarities there. But even realistically, I. From a physical standpoint, I think sometimes it's easier to take the blows inside of taking huge shots inside of a fight and keep coming forward, where. Because there's not as much of an ego involved, because I'm not really worried about what. How everybody perceives the punch that just land on me, landed on me. Whereas in life, in business, in our relationships, we have a failed account or a failed relationship, or we have. We have a setback here, immediately everybody stops and thinks, looks in the mirror and says, what's everybody else thinking around me? You know, Whereas in mixed martial arts, I don't have the time, and I call it a luxury, I think I don't. I have the luxury of not having any time. If I sit and I dwell on that one punch that just landed in it and it rocked me, and I start thinking about what the people in the nosebleeds are in the front row are thinking about that shot that just landed. The second, the third, the fourth are going to come and the knockout is going to ensue. Whereas in life, a lot of times we are stifled and stymied so much by. We take one blow, we take one shot, we take one setback, and we're just worried about everything else with. Instead of just, you know, the definition of persistence is continuing in a course of action with complete disregard to previous failures and future opposition, Right? So in life, we stop and we think way too much about what's everybody else thinking? Or how is this going to look on social media. What are the. What are the press clippings going to say? Like you said, like, there's so much to it, and I've gotten really good at. And this happened to me when I came to the ufc. Like you said, I was outside the ufc, relative obscurity. I trained hard, I was a good athlete, but I wasn't a famous athlete then. All of a sudden, you come over, you're the biggest free agent signing, maybe, in UFC history, and you. Everything doubles, and 5.5times the following, and 5times the interviews and 5times the platform, and all of a sudden you're like, wait a second. I better get used to public criticism very quickly, or else I'm gonna. I'm this thing. This ship's gonna sink. So I've just gotten really good at realizing, man, no matter what, this is my race that I'm running. And I love you, but it's still my race. And I love my wife, my kids, and I love my coaches, but this is still my race. And if I can just focus on me and know. Know that if I just keep moving forward, and if anything, we don't follow people because of their successes. We follow people more even for their failures, because they were able to over. People love us. People love a comeback. And that's what my story, my whole story has been about. I am a blueprint for how you get knocked down, get back up, and keep moving forward and then somehow end up in the biggest fight of the last decade.
- [09:31]
Ed Mylett
By the way, he's also has a future in my space, in the personal development, motivational coaching space, as you could tell, because he's got this insane ability to articulate his thoughts. Okay, a couple more things. Separations in the preparation. I don't know if there's a more finely trained athlete on the planet than you right now. I mean, in any sport, this dude's a specimen. He trains his ass off. Do you like to train, or do you do it because you know it produces a result? And how important in anything someone's doing, particularly if maybe they think they lack something, is to gain their confidence from the prep, from the preparation? I think.
- [10:14]
Michael Chandler
I think. I love. I do love to do it, because you ever ask yourself, like, what's the alternative? You know, what is the alternative? I do think I use the word easy lightly because I'm sure the audience is like, dude, I watched the training. It looks crazy, but for me, it's easy. My hard is different than your hard and different than hard for everyone else. Me thinking about doing some of the things that you do, that sounds crazy to me, but to me, maybe working out as hard as I do, half the audience is like, man, I would die in the warmup. But it's become not easy in the sense that it's not hard every time I do it, but it's what I do. It's not who I be, but it is what I do, and I'm pretty darn good at it. And I do know that it produces results. And I do think, you know, going back to the imposter syndrome or going back to the, the self sabotage and going back to the temperature gauge, going back to my self concept or my lowly self concept that I used to have if back when I was 14 years old, I didn't get into hand to hand combat thinking, okay, I'm not that talented, so I have to outwork everybody. And I've been able to take that now for the last 28 years and I've never ever lost it. And I've won world titles, I fought for the world title in the ufc. I have fought Madison Square Garden twice, fight of the year, debut of the year. I've got all of these different accolades, but still the cornerstone always is me remembering that little 14 year old boy who walked into Northwest High School and knew that I was, I had just started wrestling and everybody else had been there for years and I need to, I need to outwork all these people or I'm never going to get to where I'm going. And I still have that as a 38 year old in the sport, 20, 28 years in the sport. So I look at it like I am grateful that I have these two capable arms and these two capable legs to be able to do what I do, you know, and I, you know, I look at it as a blessing that I, you know, I train here in Deerfield Beach, Florida and there's two gyms connected to each other and there's a physical therapy, there is a phys therapy clinic in our same interest. We share one. And I see people coming in in wheelchairs, I see people coming in with cerebral palsy and I see people coming in with really bad injuries, car accidents, paralysis, all these different things. And I know it sounds a little bit dark to think about, right? But I am so blessed to be able to do what I, what I get to do. And every single one of those people would, would give anything to trade one week of this well enabled body to be able to live in this well enabled body. I really always have looked at that blessing that most people are have. They can talk about depression or they can talk about anxiety and sadness and all of these different things, but we have so many things to be thankful for that we just gloss over and overlook and just keep moving forward. And I think that's where it is. Knowing I can outwork everybody, taking my gratefulness and my gratitude for the abilities that I have and the opportunity that I have and thinking about the alternative. The alternative is me going to get in a job somewhere, and I love what I do, and I get to do it every single day.
- [13:14]
Ed Mylett
It's my producers, I guarantee you are just. Their mouths are open right now. Because right before you got here, I recorded a podcast. It'll come out after this one. But I talked about focusing on what you possess as opposed to what you don't have, and then having perspective questions about the fact that someone's got it worse than you. And when you're actually able to do those two things and focus on what you have as opposed to what you're missing and focus on the fact that you're blessed to have what you do have, that someone's got it worse, it's just amazing. Then you go say this. How much is your two last questions. Business, how much is your growth on you? Like, most people can tell from listening to you now, but I want everyone to know this man works very hard on himself. Like Michael in his downtime, I'm not his only friend in this space. Michael will attend events, he's read the books, he listens to the podcast. He. He'll speak at these events as well. He's worked very hard on the internal him and. And there's two elements of that. He's a man of very strong faith, but he's also worked on his mind, worked on his thinking, worked on himself, worked on that thermostat setting. How much of that, aside from all the physical training, do you attribute to the fact that you're going to be in the octagon on the 29th with McGregor?
- [14:23]
Michael Chandler
I think it's got. I mean, it has everything to do with it. I mean, really. And I made this. You know, I made this realization years ago when you were talking about, you know, if. For the people that don't know, I went 688 days without winning a fight. And for a lot of people, that's a. That's a death sentence for an MMA career. You know, going from world champion in Bellator to losing three fights in a row, thinking that at any point in time I was going to get my walk papers or get a. Get a phone call that I was going to get cut from the organization. And in that time, I realized I was doing all the physical work. If you're my coach and you tell me to run through that wall, I will run through that wall, no questions asked, and I will do it harder and faster and better than every single else behind me. But what I wasn't working on was my mind. And what I wasn't working on is this self image. And I was letting that get away from me. All I was doing was building up a bigger, faster, stronger, subpar version of the man that I was really created to be. Because inside of here, inside of my mind was so. It was lacking and it was so important, but it needed to be revealed to me. And that was the thing too. If a bad thing happens to you, but a good thing comes from it, and you become a better person, a better man, a better father, a better husband, a better. A better human being, you got to ask yourself, was it really a bad thing if a good thing comes from it? And I think I look at that point in my career and realize that was the catalyst and the springboard that was going to catapult me. That was the winding of the spring, and it was a painful, winding ending of the spring. It was. It came with tears, it came with self doubt, it came with embarrassment, overwhelming embarrassment. But it was that coiling of that spring that eventually springboarded me to becoming the next version of the man that I needed to be. And yeah, I mean, I just. I've always been. I've always just been curious and admired people like yourself who, who, who are trying to make the world a better place. Admitting their flaws, admitting, showing and wearing their heart on their sleeve and talking about the struggles that you have gone through and how there's a lesson in every single loss. And you know, I've been very blessed with so many great friends, and I have a duty to them to continue to be a part of that community. I have. And I have a duty to my family and I have a duty to myself. And most importantly, I have a duty to my almighty God who created me. Not just to be good, not just to be that little boy who was going to play it small and, and think that he doesn't deserve great things and think that I could just, you know, barely get enough and barely get by and live paycheck to paycheck and nobody knows my name. I've. I was commissioned and. And I have this conviction, this deep conviction to know that I was created to do something extraordinary. And it took years and years and years. And I just want to keep on adding to that. And when people say the sky is the limit, you know, it's. It's a. It's a term that we use, but at some point you start to believe it and you. And you believe it not because of the Bentleys. And the Bugatti and the boats and the watches and all the material things. But it's the things that, that you make people feel just with your presence and with your, with your words and your voice. And that's what I want to be able to do. And now we got the biggest, the biggest platform we ever could have asked for. And the sky is the limit.
- [17:25]
Ed Mylett
Hey, guys. It's always interesting when you stop doing something that you realize, you know, I probably should have kept doing it because it mattered so much. I had been taking im8 for a while. It's feeling awesome. Then life got a little bit busy over the holidays. I skipped some days, huge mistake. My energy dropped, focus was gone. And honestly, it makes sense when you look at what's in it. IMH Daily Ultimate Essentials drink brings together 92 high quality nutrients. And I don't know what they all are, but I can tell you this, you feel great. You got high energy when you're on them. What I do know is in it. Vitamins, minerals, adaptogens. So give your body what it deserves with IMA. Go to im8health.comed and use code ED for a free welcome kit. Five free travel sachets plus 10% off your order. Seriously, this is one of those offers you'll wish you jumped on Sooner. Go to im8health.comed and use code ED for a free welcome kit. Five free travel sachets plus 10% off your order. Imaidhealth.com ED code ED these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. So you know what, everybody? I really appreciate the comments about, you know, I've gotten a lot leaner and built more muscle this year. And it was really intentional. And I was thinking, how can I get ahead, you know, on my fitness? Because I'm already pretty fit and worked out and it was how I'm eating. And that's where Factor came in. Factor doesn't ask you to meal prep or follow recipes. It just removes the entire problem. Two minutes, real food. Bam, done. And so once I started eating healthier and using Factor, not only did I get a lot leaner, but I built more muscle. And the truth is, guys, I had more energy. And what I love about Factor, it's already made by chefs, designed by dietitians, and delivered to your door. You should be in Factor's world, just like I am. Hey, to factor meals.com my let50OFF and use code my let50OFF to get 50% off your first factor box. Plus free breakfast for a year offer only valid for new customers with code and qualifying auto renewing subscription purchase. Make healthier eating easy with factor. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to Max out, everybody. I'm so excited about today's program because I'm one of the most inspirational people, I think, on earth today with me, and she was also. I always put these polls out to you guys saying, who do you want on my show? And there kept being this name coming up, this beautiful name, by the way. Fallon Taylor. Fallon Taylor. Get her on your show. And so I'm so excited that she's here today. This lady to my left is amazing. She's an incredible entrepreneur. She's got an amazing social media and YouTube presence, but she's probably best known for being a world barrel racing champion. And not only is that extraordinary, but she did that after breaking her neck and having a 2% chance to even ever walk again. And she comes back and wins what is really the World Series of barrel racing. So I'm so excited for you guys to hear this story. So thank you for being here.
- [20:24]
Fallon Taylor
Thank you so much. I really am excited to be here.
- [20:27]
Ed Mylett
So, guys, now here we go. Just so you know, if you're driving the car, you need to grip your steering wheel a little bit tighter because this is about to get really good. Like, really hugely inspiring. If you're on the treadmill at the gym, you're about to go from level 7 to level 10 like that. And if you're watching YouTube, this is the part where you bring your kids in the room and you say, watch this. Okay, so tell them what happens. You're starting to make your comeback, guys. This is one of the most amazing stories you're going to hear. So you're making your comeback and what happens?
- [20:58]
Fallon Taylor
Well, I'd like to tell you my mantra of it's going to get rocky. And I'm going to tell you the mantra that my dad told me the whole time throughout my entire career and me being very risky was, whatever you do, don't end up in a hospital because you'll die in there. And, you know, it just kind of rang in my head because I was riding dangerous horses and I was doing a lot of training. And then I started training around the clock because of the weather and I needed Needed my bills paid, and I'm riding, riding, riding and taking chances that I shouldn't have had to take, you know, just because I was not understanding my growth and I wasn't understanding my contribution. And so I was training really late at night in August in 2009, and I'm riding this horse that's fine. Everything's fine. We're training. Everything's normal. My poor staff member was there with her boyfriend, and it's just us, lonely at night, lights on in the arena, and. And I'm gonna train this horse. And as I was taking off around the arena, this horse slipped kind of in a mud puddle. And it was not a big deal, you know, whatever. He slips, and he was feeling frisky. And you kind of know that when a horse behaves a certain way, he's feeling a little frisky. I should have known better. I should have taken more precautions, but I didn't. It's what I do for a living. What's the big deal? And I start laughing, I start giggling, and this horse starts to buckle. And when I say buck, you know, horses can play and buck, and they can crow, hop and buck. This horse did something that's like a wild instinct. So he reared up. When he did, he broke all the bones on this side of my face. And when he came down to the ground, I'm still laughing. I'm like, okay, whatever. And, you know, in the cowboy industry, it's, you gotta be tough, you know? And so I start to pull this horse up, and as I do, he hits me in the head again. And I scold fracture in four places. Of course, I don't know this. And of course I'm not wearing a helmet, because that's just not the cool, tough thing to do. And he begins to buck a little bit more. And I just decide that I'm going to pick a place off over here to jump off, which is a terrible idea. But I picked a place to kind of jump off. And when I did, he kicked my feet about 13 or 14ft in the air. And I landed straight down on my head. My legs just kind of flopped over and I was unable to move. I was paralyzed right in that moment. And what a tough place to be in, you know, because I was in this horrible relationship and in a spot where I'm like, who's gonna save me? You know, so all I have is my career. If I get hurt, I can't make a living. How am I gonna take care of myself? I'm in this horrible place how am.
- [23:29]
Dean Graziosi
I going to get up?
- [23:29]
Fallon Taylor
I got to get up. And so my friend came over. I was strapped down to a picnic table because I was too cheap to ride in an ambulance. So I get taken in a pickup truck on a, on a, in a pickup truck on a picnic table to the hospital. And I get there and I start joking with the, the staff because it's just my way. And the lady in the front desk, my friend went in and asked for a girl, and she said, you don't need a gurney. That girl's out there telling jokes. Quit being so dramatic. So my friend that was a paramedic, they take me in and they finally get me a gurney. I could have walked. I think. I think I could have. But when I got through the MRI machine and joking with the doctor that was helping me, I kept telling him, you know, hooters closes in 15 minutes and we're really close now. Like, let's go get the some food. Tell me I have a concussion. Let's get out of here. And he came back in the room. He said, you have a 2% chance to live. And he said, it's really been touching to get to know you, but he said, the plane's running and you have 13 minute flight to think about your life. And I hope that you really take that time to think about what you're gonna do now, because you're never gonna ride horses again. And I'll never forget getting. I'll never. I don't know why I remember the guys names. There were two guys named Russell that carried me to the plane and had me on this, you know, in the C collar and strapped to the table. And I get to.
- [24:59]
Ed Mylett
Someone get me some tissue, please. Someone grab one. Thank you.
- [25:02]
Fallon Taylor
I get to the hospital room and there's a whole nother story in the hospital. But I was told again, I have 2% chance to live, that I would never walk again. The neurosurgeon told me I was an absolute idiot for riding horses. Thank you. They don't stop. They come down and it's over.
- [25:22]
Ed Mylett
It's beautiful.
- [25:24]
Fallon Taylor
So I had a second to think, and all I could think of was my dad telling me, you know, you're gonna die in a hospital. You can't. Don't die in a hospital. And I'm like, this is crazy superstition that you're gonna die in a hospital. And I wake up the next day, heavily drugged, obviously with a halo on. I had a girlfriend in the hospital tell me they're gonna offer you two scenarios you can get the surgery with the box in your neck, or you can get the halo. They're gonna shave your head. You're gonna have holes in your head. She said, go that way. I've seen this go a bunch of different ways. So when the doctor came in, I started bawling, and I was like, I want the halo. You know, all I can think of is this cage on my head. I want the halo. At this point, I've called my mom and dad and told them that I was an offender bender, because they're with their grandkids in California. And I'm like, I'm an offender bender. Everything's fine. It's all fine. It's gonna be fine. And I've got to figure out a way to get out of this hospital. So I get these nurses that come in, and I say, hey, how can I get out of here? Because now I've got this real embedded childhood fear that I'm gonna die in the hospital. And I've got a damn good chance at this point with the situation I'm in, I could die in here. So shout out to all the amazing medical professionals, because it's just my own superstition. They did an amazing job. One came in, I said, I need to get out of here. And she laughed at me. And she said, well, you know, when you can walk from one end of the hall to the other, then they'll let you out. But you're not going to do that. You got a long time. You need to settle in. You've got about six months. You're going to be here. So the next nurse came in and she said. She laughed at me. And she goes, you know, she's writing. Oh, you've got six months. You know, you just, like, settle in. And then the next lady came in really late on shift, and she was amazing, and if I could find her, I would give her everything I've got. She came in and I said, how do I get out of here? I got to get out of here. Like, I really got to get out of here. And she said, well, you walk to the end of the hall and you come back, you can get out. And I said, well, let's do that. How do we do that? Wow. She said, well. Well, you gotta get up. And the big risk is, you know, if and when you fall down, you know, you can wiggle your fingers and toes, and that's good. But when you get up, it's not gonna feel like you thought it was. And you got all this equipment on Your head, you're gonna hit the ground, and then you could die. And I was like, well, they've given me terrible odds at this point, so what the hell? And it was just very cool. This lady, that moment, she has no idea what she did for me, because she just, like, just. Well, you know, I'm willing to try it. She takes the belt and she ties it to the ceiling, and I get up and I fall down, just like she said I would. And then she said, if you just put one foot in front of the other, you know, you can get down to the end of the hall, and it could take you months, but we're gonna try it.
- [28:09]
Ed Mylett
Wow.
- [28:10]
Fallon Taylor
It took me about an hour and a half, And I got up and down the end of the hall, and I took all the people that didn't believe me. You know, the lady at the front desk and the nurses that came in, and. And I said, tomorrow, I'm going to deliver flowers to each and every one of you guys because you didn't believe. And maybe I can change your mind, because other people are going to come in here.
- [28:29]
Ed Mylett
Oh, my gosh.
- [28:30]
Fallon Taylor
And they need to know they can walk. And so the next day, I gathered up all my strength. Mom, at this point, knows that I've had. I've been structurally destroyed, is what I was told. She got called from, actually, a newspaper outlet that was interviewing for rodeo publication that had leaked my medical records. So my parents found out in that way. So now I've got to do damage control and learn to walk. And I told mom, I said, we got to go to the florist. I made him a promise. And so it was a really cool scene to watch. All of these people that just didn't believe. Instead of me being angry at these people that didn't believe in my journey to just shine a light on it and show them a different way. So I went and got floral arrangements for every single person that told me I couldn't do it. And I walked in there, and I walked to each of their offices, and I think, hopefully I gave them a gift that they can always have.
- [29:25]
Ed Mylett
You're amazing.
- [29:27]
Fallon Taylor
You may not believe how I'm gonna do it, but it gave me a lot of clarity, too. Sometimes you're just not asking the right person, you know?
- [29:38]
Ed Mylett
Wow. I think. I think everybody should just literally go back and listen to all of this again.
- [29:44]
Fallon Taylor
Thank you.
- [29:45]
Ed Mylett
You make this honestly. I'm gonna tell you something. This is, like, such a blessing to be here with you.
- [29:49]
Fallon Taylor
Thank you.
- [29:49]
Ed Mylett
It's a blessing to be Here with you. Thank you. I'm really moved right now, and I'm trying to not get too moved so that I can still ask you questions.
- [29:58]
Fallon Taylor
But it has a happy ending.
- [30:00]
Ed Mylett
I know.
- [30:00]
Fallon Taylor
It's such a happy ending, but it's.
- [30:03]
Ed Mylett
A. I know we're gonna go to there, but it's a happy ending because of everything you just said, that there's so many things in there that we all have these people who don't believe in us, and we're scared, and they're scared, too.
- [30:17]
Fallon Taylor
They're scared to tell me I could walk down the hall because they know I can't. They're scared, too.
- [30:21]
Ed Mylett
And maybe that's true for so many people where you have these people in your life that are close to you that are maybe pulling you down. Maybe they're just scared for you. Maybe they're scared for them that you're going to leave them, too. Right?
- [30:30]
Fallon Taylor
Absolutely.
- [30:30]
Ed Mylett
And everything that you have, and I just want to acknowledge you like, you're freaking amazing. Like, you're amazing. And I just. To be clear with everybody, this break was very serious. Very similar to Christopher Reeve. Right. I mean, not all that dissimilar injury. Correct.
- [30:48]
Fallon Taylor
It's not. It's the same injury. So when you break your C2, that's what controls your head going left or right, and you have a very, very, very small chance of making it out on the other side. With a lot of neck breaks, this would be the. The one that you really don't want, you know, to happen.
- [31:06]
Ed Mylett
Unbelievable. I'm picturing you there. I mean, you tell the story so well. I can actually picture you, and I'm so proud of you. You just. Remarkable. And everybody that just heard this, I told them they were going to be moved, but I didn't even know until you told it in front of me how much it would move me. It put in perspective so many things that I think are big obstacles in my life that really aren't, and so many things that I think are a really big deal, and they're not, and that is a big deal.
- [31:32]
Fallon Taylor
You wake up and wiggle your fingers and your toes. Tomorrow you're gonna be like, okay, we're all okay.
- [31:39]
Ed Mylett
Just amazing. And so now it gets actually more amazing now.
- [31:43]
Fallon Taylor
Thank you.
- [31:43]
Ed Mylett
Yes. You go through the process of rebuilding yourself, and then you make the crazy decision, it would seem to me, to actually get back on a horse again. Right. So what was that like? And what was the first time like, if you don't mind sharing that?
- [31:58]
Fallon Taylor
It was horrible. And I Would love to share it. I was like, Ricky Bobby in the race car. I'm killing it. And then you look over and people are like, yeah, you're doing really great, sweetie. You're walking. This is great.
- [32:11]
Ed Mylett
Really, really.
- [32:12]
Fallon Taylor
And so I thought, you know, learning to walk again is pretty big hurdle. It's pretty tough. And then learning to ride again and you get over the path that, okay, I'm going to do this again. And the neurosurgeon's telling me I shouldn't do this again. Sure, okay, now I'm going to wear some helmets. I'm going to get him to wear a helmet. And I'm going to, I'm going to actually do this thing the right way. And then I started thinking about, I wonder if other people have had these things. And I start to read everybody's story. And I start to wonder if the human mind can comprehend getting up and walking out of a hospital when you've been told a 2% chance, maybe I can go back to 14 year old me that wanted a world title and let's do this thing and let's actually give it a shot. And I thought, if I can have a goal big enough that makes my future look brighter than my past, then that will keep me hooked towards something that I want so badly, you know, because we're all gonna lose and you're gonna suck and you're gonna go broke doing it and you're gonna have people that don't want you to do it and you're gonna fail ultimately and keep getting up and dust off and fail. But if the thing is so bright that you have to walk toward it, you'll stay hooked. And I stayed hooked. And I had a horse in my front pasture. Just a small, brief rundown. I had a horse in my front pasture that the trainer told me nobody could ride. And I thought, well, that would be pretty cool. I'm gonna go get that one.
- [33:35]
Ed Mylett
Oh, my gosh.
- [33:36]
Fallon Taylor
So I got that horse that was raised on my place and I actually, her mom and dad was the horses I went to the National Finals on when I was a kid. And I was like, I'm gonna ride this thing. And I trained her and within a year we were already fighting for another chance back to the National Finals Rodeo.
- [33:56]
Ed Mylett
What?
- [33:56]
Fallon Taylor
Which is just unheard of. And she's just been.
- [33:59]
Ed Mylett
Is this Baby Flo?
- [34:00]
Fallon Taylor
This is Baby Flo.
- [34:01]
Ed Mylett
Okay.
- [34:02]
Fallon Taylor
So that was a really cool part of my journey. And then I hit another road bump. Just what I think everybody does. I qualified for the national finals rodeo in 2013. And here I am, I'm ready to go and I'm gonna show the world. And I go in and I was terrible on TV 10 days in a row. It was just the worst ever. And I thought, well, there went the walking miracle thing. Like, now they're just like, she's a walking miracle that doesn't ride very good.
- [34:28]
Ed Mylett
Oh, my gosh.
- [34:28]
Fallon Taylor
Here we go.
- [34:29]
Ed Mylett
Okay. It's pretty big walking miracle to be there, but I understand. What a letdown not to perform your best.
- [34:35]
Fallon Taylor
I've got this career and, you know, people have known that I've already been. And here's my comeback 20 years later or 25 years later, whatever it is.
- [34:41]
Ed Mylett
And boom.
- [34:42]
Fallon Taylor
And I'm terrible at this on this big platform. And I thought, man, I've got to do this better.
- [34:48]
Ed Mylett
So was that what you were thinking? Stay there. So at the time, but were you super depressed, super bummed out for a while? I just wanted to have people understand what that's like.
- [34:56]
Fallon Taylor
Season. The season ends September 30th. Or is it September 31st? End of September, okay, October 1st, it begins. So you have a 24 hour span to be really depressed or get it together. And it was in that moment I was like, okay, I've got to do this again. I got to do this again. And I want to show my parents what my horse can do. And if I just put that. That is my biggest light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe I put that in front of the world title. Maybe I just scale it back. Maybe I just do this one thing of just, I want to show my face on TV again. Running my horse as this person with this cool comeback story. And I want to make a difference and I want to show that nobody show me stats, nobody show me numbers. Nobody talk about anything. I qualified back third in the world. The girl that was winning, it was a sure thing.
- [35:49]
Ed Mylett
Okay?
- [35:50]
Fallon Taylor
Second place was the sure thing. Third place was the girl that blows it on tv. But let's all feel sorry for her, you know, because of the neck thing. So I come back and I decided that I'm going to put my head down and I don't want to talk about anything but just focusing on one foot in front of the other, just like I did before, because that's been my formula.
- [36:09]
Ed Mylett
Literally, like learning to walk.
- [36:10]
Fallon Taylor
Literally one foot in front of the other.
- [36:13]
Ed Mylett
So last week, I'm on stage speaking, I got a new shirt on, got a bunch of dms from my friends that were there going, you looking pretty fly, Mylett. You're looking pretty sharp. Then I get off the stage and the producer says, hey, I like that button up look on you. Guess where I got it all from. Quints. It's true. It's a great place to buy clothes that look good, feel good and it's affordable. And here's the biggest thing. I'm not breaking the bank this year on clothes. And I'm probably sure you don't want to do that either. So that cashmere sweater you're looking at, you can get it there. Ridiculously soft, doesn't cost a fortune. The button up shirt I was wearing last week, that's where I got it. Let me just tell you something. I also like this. If it doesn't fit, send it back. They'll send you the one that does. They're awesome. I'm getting, I don't know, 50% of my wardrobe now. All from Quince. So refresh your wardrobe with quince. Go to quince.comed for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. By the way, that's Quince. Q U I n c e.com ed Free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com ed My day kicks off with a refreshing Celsius energy drink. Then straight to the gym, pre K pickup back home to meal prep. Time for my fire station shift. One more Celsius. Gotta keep the lights on when the three alarm hits. I'm ready. Celsius Live fit. Go grab a cold refreshing Celsius at your local retailer or locate now@celsius.com so.
- [37:36]
Fallon Taylor
I get on my horse. Round one comes. I've never won a round at the National Finals Rodeo at this point. I've made like 50 runs in that arena. Never won. I've placed.
- [37:46]
Ed Mylett
Before breaking your neck.
- [37:46]
Fallon Taylor
Before breaking my neck. Done. Good.
- [37:48]
Ed Mylett
Yep.
- [37:49]
Fallon Taylor
My 51st run. I win it. I told all my staff, all my friends, everybody. I said, let's go home. Wrap it up. I don't want to make the other nine runs.
- [37:57]
Andre Ward
Done.
- [37:57]
Fallon Taylor
Victory. Let's go.
- [37:59]
Ed Mylett
Amazing.
- [38:00]
Fallon Taylor
So then I thought, well, we just keep doing this. One foot in front of the other thing. Let's just keep doing that. So run by run, the sure thing girl just starts slipping down the pack. Boom, boom, boom. And then here I am. And of course, you know, there's people that love you and hate you in sports. So I'm getting, you know, people that think I'm ridiculous and people that think that I'm great and, you know, whatever. It's Polarizing. It's fun for the fans, but the sure thing, second place girl, she's really a sure thing. And she just starts going, and she's doing great. I'm doing great, and I look up to her so much. So, you know, it's cool for us to be kind of in this battle. And something I've never said before, I think on any of my social media, is that the 10th round that would determine the champion. She came up to me, and she shook my hand, and she said, well, you've done really great, and I'm just super excited for you. And I thought I just won the world title because I realized that she hadn't celebrated yet, and I already had. And in my mind, I had my outfit picked out, and I was gonna be wearing gold because the gold buckle, and I was gonna be the gold title holder, and I would have this gold. And I knew that when I walked in, I would jump up and down, and I would have this gold buckle in my hand. And I was like, wow, if I just don't mess this up, this is gonna. This is gonna work. And I went in. She made a beautiful run. It was great. And they swung the gate open for me to go, and my dad's standing right beside me, and I was like, man, this would be a really bad time to screw this up, wouldn't it? Just put one foot in front of the other. Don't try anything fancy. And I think that's been something that I've held with me so long, that's so effective. Go in, and I made my run, and I come out, and I look at the board, and I'm the winner. I'm the winner. And of course, I lose it, and I'm losing it. And the cameras are coming, and the, you know, ESPN's here, and CBS is here, and all of them are coming around. And I look at my dad, and he was like, you just won the world. I was like, I'm gonna go jump on that stage. Just like I did in my head really quick, and it was so cool. And they, you know, whisked me off. And here I go down into the bottom. And just a funny, funny story is the security guard said, you didn't win it. They made a mistake. It's someone else. And I was like, someone needs to get me a bucket, because I am for sure gonna vomit right now. And they came back and said, it's amazing. We actually give the victory lap to the person that wins the average. And you didn't win the average, but you won the world. And it's such a cool thing because in my mind, I was shooting for the average, and I wanted to win this, you know, the aggregate. I wanted to be the most consistent person because that's what everybody told me I couldn't be. And I ended up with the world title. So, yeah, you don't always get what you want. Sometimes you get something so much cooler, so much better.
- [40:40]
Dean Graziosi
Better.
- [40:40]
Ed Mylett
So it's gotta be. I mean, listen, first, it should be a movie.
- [40:44]
Fallon Taylor
Thank you.
- [40:45]
Ed Mylett
I mean, for sure. And all of my producer friends that are watching this, like, hello. About to give you her Instagram in a minute. It should be a movie. It's an unfreaking, believable story. Like. Like, even hearing it now, look at me. Like, I'm just. It's so remarkable what you've achieved and.
- [41:02]
Damar Hamlin
And.
- [41:02]
Ed Mylett
And still continue to achieve, too. But I just got to tell you, like, just so you know, I've had a. Just for me. Like, this is such a gift for me. Like, I do shows, and I love doing them, but today is a gift for me. Like, you're remarkable. You inspire me. The story, the way you tell it.
- [41:16]
Fallon Taylor
I can't wait for this to go to your audience and people to see it, because I know somebody is struggling.
- [41:21]
Ed Mylett
Well, of course they are. And like, you embody. See, some people, like, I talk about these things. That's great. You embody it. You've lived it. You are it. Like, it's your evidence of it. Like, you're living proof that the things you teach and talk about are real. Like, there's someone right next to me right now who's living proof that you can accomplish anything, that you were washed up in your mind. You were a. Has been. It was over so many things.
- [41:47]
Fallon Taylor
I believed about myself that I hear people go, I'm too old. And I go, how old are you? 21. And I'm like, what is wrong with the world? Like, no, you're fine. I don't think anybody at 90, 95 is too old to do something really cool with their life.
- [42:01]
Ed Mylett
Do you struggle? Let's go through some things about you. Like, it's hard to move off that, just to be honest with you. Like, I'm actually right on the verge right here. I'm trying to not do what you're doing. So I'm waterworks.
- [42:15]
Fallon Taylor
I can keep us going all day.
- [42:16]
Ed Mylett
One of us have to not be right. It should be my turn, by the way. I should be allowed to on the inside. I certainly am. My audience knows Me well enough too, by the way. I must tell you that it's just, it's remarkable to me the way that you just articulate it too. It's so beautiful. But you, though, let's talk about you for a minute because I think men can relate to what you're going to talk about here in a minute too. But really, women can too. You strike me as I've gotten to know you a little bit, that you still do struggle with some of these things, whether it be your, maybe even, which is amazing, but even some of your own confidence, even to this day. Is that true? And how. Tell them a little bit about that part of you still. And how you navigate through confidence is.
- [42:58]
Fallon Taylor
Something that I think everyone, when you walk into a space, you can feel somebody really confident coming out of that space. And when I help people, whether it be with horses or with anything that I help with, the first thing that I find is that they believe something that's so wildly untrue about themselves and it's so deeply ingrained in themselves that they just, they can't get away from that belief of their themselves. And for mine, it was, I'm too old to make a comeback, or I'm too injured to get to the gym, or, you know, I've already accomplished all that I can accomplish anyway. Or for me, it's like, oh, well, I always need to have a six pack and be in perfect professional athletic shape. And what's so untrue about that is how many people would love to have my body type? How many people would love to be in my position? How many people, if dealt my hand, could play it so much better? How many people, you know, if you just take a look around at people that I'm able to help, you know, I've helped people that weren't even able to leave their home, that just needed inspiration to be able to. They were, you know, in such a place with their obesity that they're not able to even stand up. How do you tell that person that you don't feel great about your body? How do you tell that person that you're not able to take advantage of all the opportunities in your life? There's always somebody in your position. There's people that I've met with without limbs that are doing more than I've been able to accomplish? So in your position, what are those things that have tied you to that thought that have kept you from where you're going? It's like the elephant tied to the chair. You know, why the elephant can Just walk away.
- [44:30]
Ed Mylett
Yeah. And he's getting so used to believing he can't. He stays right there. Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now, on with the show. Hey, everybody. Ed Mylett. I'm so excited to be back with you today with another program on the Max Out Show. We bring you people all the time that have maxed out areas of their life. They're the best in the world. And the gentleman to my left, the reason I've been after him to do this show for so long is because I think he's maxing out multiple areas of his life. Life. The obvious area is that this is one of the greatest boxers of the last two decades and you might even argue in the history of the sport. And so the gentleman on my left here is retired this last year to be. A year ago this week. 32 0. 320 has not lost a fight since he was 14 years old and was an Olympic gold medalist, went on to win the super six tournament of the super middleweight division and was a light heavyweight champion of the world. And so this is one of the greatest athletes, but I think one of the great men in the United States. So, Andre Ward, thank you for being here today.
- [45:38]
Andre Ward
Thanks for having me.
- [45:39]
Ed Mylett
Let's talk a little boxing. We gotta go there. We'll talk some family. Let's talk some boxing. So I'm curious. I'm a bit. I'm a big boxing fan. So when you became on my radar was during the super six tournament. Okay, so that was. And they called that the. The. The super middleweight division at the time. Correct.
- [45:59]
Andre Ward
Middleweight, 168 pounds.
- [46:00]
Ed Mylett
But basically, I'm paraphrasing, Showtime got together and said, let's just find the best one in the world. They put the six of you in this tournament. It ended up being a seventh dude or something. Wasn't Jermaine Taylor in it originally? Or what happened?
- [46:09]
Andre Ward
Well, there were guys that, like, guys would get knocked out or get injured and then they replace. But it was always six.
- [46:15]
Ed Mylett
So again, you had Kessler, you had frocked or frock, whatever they call them. There's some. There's some dudes in this tournament. Right. And you had ended up winning that tournament. I'm curious, when it started at that level, was that a new level for you? And like, did you have fear like, did you wonder whether you were the man of those six? How'd that work for you?
- [46:36]
Andre Ward
I had to drop everything. We went, got in the car, got back to San Diego, flew to the Bay Area, literally dropped my family off, packed a bag, double ear infection, got on the red eye, went to Germany and was there the next morning to announce the second leg of the Super 6. And was this close to not being a part of it.
- [46:54]
Ed Mylett
That's crazy. And the way they filmed it, everybody, by the way, this was so powerful. All this 247 stuff. You see now, this is kind of the original of that. And it was so well done. It really changed to some extent how boxing was promoted on either Showtime or HBO to the way they laid it out. But I watched it closely, and you weren't the dude they were sort of steering the cameras towards. In the beginning. It was really interesting. It was the other guys that I've mentioned before, and I remember you won, then you won again. I'm like, oh, this dude's got a chance to win this whole tournament. So every one of these fights. Just curious when you went into it. I just want to know how, like, a world class person thinks or doesn't think. You're there at that thing in Germany, you see these other five dudes. Are you like, I'm gonna win this tournament or.
- [47:36]
Andre Ward
I've always had that belief. Like, my career was. My professional career was guided very meticulously. You know, the powers that be, the networks, the suits, the promoters, like, they, they want bang for their buck. They want to make the most money as quickly as possible. And I had opportunities to fight some of the guys that were in the tournament maybe a year or two earlier. And it was for more money than I'd ever seen. And, you know, great opportunity. And, you know, I called Verge, like, man, they're going to give us, you know, 600,000 and we get to fight on, you know, HBO and this and that or Showtime. And he said, no, no, he said, hold on. He said, I understand that, you know, if we say no to this internally, there's going to be some blowback. But he said, you know, when we fight these guys, I want you to be a full grown man and I want you to destroy him. Like, I don't want, you know, I don't want you to be barely winning or barely eeking by. And we did that like two or three times before the Super 6 happened. And we get blowback. And some of the blowback spilled publicly where fans are saying, oh, you know, wars. He's a gold medalist, but he's moving too slow. And that's the heat you take. Yeah, that's the bullseye you have on your back coming in with a gold medal. But in Germany, I really saw what the intent was. You had Michael Kessler, who was Michael Kessler at the time. He's like 42 and 40 or something like that, but, like, I don't know how many knockouts. He had more knockouts than I had fights. You had Carl Frach, who was from the uk, and you had Arthur Abraham. And then you had three Americans, Jermaine Taylor, who was teetering. He was still relevant, but he was teetering on kind of being done. You had the young guy, Andre Darrell, and then you had the other young guy and myself. And I could tell that everybody that was there, they just looked at us like we were just a token, just.
- [49:22]
Ed Mylett
Just to be there.
- [49:23]
Andre Ward
Like, these guys will make it interesting. Some namesake young guys coming up. But these guys, these are the guys that are supposed to win. And I took exception to that, took it personal. I took exception to that. And I got on the phone, I called Ver, I said, man, they don't really expect me to win this. He said, oh, yeah, I know. He said, it's always been like that. He said, but just watch. Unwavering faith. He's always that pillar. And again. And that jumped off on me. It's already confident, but now. Now it was personal. Now it was personal.
- [49:53]
Ed Mylett
Your physiology changes so dramatically. You go into your Virgil thing. And at that time, Kessler and Frotch were like rock stars in their various countries, too, right? They were big names.
- [50:06]
Andre Ward
And real quick, I don't blame anybody for not picking us. Like, I probably wouldn't have picked me. I was a young guy. Yeah, I had the gold medal, but I had no. Done anything as a pro. My biggest win was a guy named Edison Miranda, who was a beast. He was a top contender, right? That was my biggest win as a professional. So I don't blame anybody for not picking me, but I was also going to use that as fuel and ammunition. I was going to use it.
- [50:31]
Ed Mylett
So he goes on to win that like he wins everything else. This other thing you said through. I just want to hear everybody. Everyone just hear things I hear that I think are important. I do think that there are times in your life where if you don't jump on an opportunity, you will regret it the rest of your life. That there is timing to when you win. There are moments, and you've said this a few times, Where Virgil said this to you. And for a lot of you that are chasing what you're chasing, you may get fatigued to that chase. But there's got to be this party that goes, if I don't jump on this now, this may never come again for me. So your timing is so critical on winning this super six tournament was a huge catalyst. Let's talk some boxing stuff just for me, because I want to know some stuff.
- [51:06]
Andre Ward
Okay.
- [51:07]
Ed Mylett
I'm curious when you. I told you I was going to ask you this and you haven't told me the answer, so I'm curious. Forget the training part just for a second. We're going to get to that. You are getting wrapped. You're about to go out. Okay, for a big fight, you're getting wrapped up. I'm sure Virgil's talking to you. You're going through whatever your game plan was. What goes through you? Is there honest emotions here as a fighter? See, the thing about bottom boxing to me is that it's different than every other sport. UFC has some of this as well. But the combat sports, this is a man and a man, I think people forget this. Like even when you bat as a baseball hitter, there's another dude coming up after you. If you ground out, the other dude could get the hit. Right? This is a man and a man. And I'm just curious, when you have that happening, you're getting, look at your physiology changed again, right? But I'm just curious, like when you're getting wrapped at that moment, what, what's going through you emotionally, what's happening to you at that time?
- [52:01]
Andre Ward
That moment can break a lot of men. You can have a great training camp, everything could be clicking. You could have a great fight week leading up to that moment. And that moment as well as the walk to the ring, you can lose it. Like you can lose your confidence, you can let fear overtake you and you can somehow convince yourself that you're not worthy to be there in that moment. It's almost like an out of body experience. You hear people say, you know, a guy froze or you know, he didn't perform or it was a deer in the headlights. Like that's what they're talking about. Like you have, it's almost like a surreal moment. Like this, this moment that you've been prepping for, talking about, building up to the world has been talking about. Like it's here and the fact that it's actually hear, like it hits you in a, in a different kind of way. Like you're getting rap and you have the commission from whatever state you're fighting. They're coming in, they're checking on you, they're giving, they're giving you the countdown. We got 45 minutes, we got 30 minutes, we got 20. Then they come back in after you get your, your gloves back on. And they, and they say, we got five minutes. We're walking in two and a half minutes. And they start to count you down. Like, whether you train good or not, that's running through your brain. Thinking about my wife and my kids. I'm thinking about the fact that the whole world is literally going to be watching me in just a few moments, thinking about my critics. They got a front row seat. They got a front row seat. Thinking about my supporters and the people that are riding with me, getting behind me. They got a front row seat. They're watching, they're pulling for me. It's like this, like this controlled chaos that's going on. And it's literally an arena. It's with two gladiators getting ready to literally risk it all. Like, boxing is the only sport, professional sport that I know of, that one loss can change your pay scale. Like, it's in the contract. If you lose a fight, your minimums can change. We can renegotiate those minimums. Like, that's what's going through my head. And fear is very real.
- [54:13]
Ed Mylett
Really.
- [54:14]
Andre Ward
Anxiety is very real. It's very present. And all the guys that say, I don't get nervous, yeah, I don't, I'm Iron man. They're not being honest. Like, that's very, very present. But that's where my fate, I knew yours comes in. And I start to believe beyond myself. I start to believe beyond the way that I'm feeling. Like. We're called to walk by faith and not by sight. We're called to walk by faith and not by feeling. So fear is present, but courage is going in the midst of fear. And I've had 32 fights before I retired. I had to do that every single time. It's not like, oh, this is the 25th time I've done this. It's easy because one punch can change your pay scale. One punch can change your life. And you're not guaranteed to walk out the same way you walked in. So all of that is going through your mind, running through your body, and you got to channel it, you got to process it, and you got to believe and you got to be unwavering. And one thing I would always do was I would, would kind of just pace the Locker room. And even though my team's in there, even though the commissioner's coming in and out, and again, this like controlled chaos. Television cameras are in your face, producers are walking around. You hear the crowd, you hear the announcer. I would just talk to myself. It's my night. It's my night. I'm not going home without my belts. Like those types of things, they may seem corny to some people, but that stuff would really lift me up. And because a made up mind is a hard thing to break. And your mind has to be made up, not walking to the ring or when you step through those ropes, your mind has to be made up before you leave that locker room that I'm not gonna be broken. I will not lose tonight.
- [56:05]
Ed Mylett
Oh, my gosh. You ever get, you ever get there where you're at the stare down and look at a dude and know you got him? Has that ever happened or is it on a professional level? You just don't know? Does it ever happen the reverse where you're in that state, you're in that faith state, you're in that strong state and you've looked, you're like, oh, I got this fool. Has that ever happened? You have to tell me who.
- [56:25]
Andre Ward
Most times. No. Okay. Because as fighters, we can lie. Yeah, yeah, we're good chameleons. Because in the sport of boxing, if you show weakness, the opponent's gonna pound. So we hide a lot of our emotions. You know, you got some guys that are scared to death and they'll, they'll, they'll put a mask on. There's one time, one time in a 32 fight career that I knew I had a guy at the weigh in, Chad Dawson.
- [56:53]
Ed Mylett
You knew. You even told me who it was. And he, by the way, Chad Dawson was a great fighter.
- [56:57]
Damar Hamlin
But you knew.
- [56:58]
Andre Ward
How'd you know?
- [56:58]
Ed Mylett
Why'd you know? He.
- [57:02]
Andre Ward
So you get a lot of rumors and you hear a lot of hearsay in training camp. Yeah, this guy, you know, they'll call my coach. And I stayed away from that stuff, but my coach always had his ear to what was going on with my opponent. And he would decide on what he would, what he wanted to share and what he wouldn't want to share. The guy, Edison Miranda that I just told you about, he was sparring with Chad Dawson to help Chad Dawson get ready for our fight. Big fight. Chad Dawson was the Lineage light heavyweight champion, had just beat the great legendary Bernard Hopkins.
- [57:33]
Ed Mylett
Southpaw.
- [57:34]
Andre Ward
The fight before. Yes. Tall, rangy, he beat Bernard Hopkins. He's on hbo Max Kellerman asks him, you know, Chad, what do you want next? I'm minding my own business. He calls my name. I just won the Super 6. He said, I want Andre Ward. He said, I'll fight him in his hometown of Oakland, California, and I'll go down to his weight, too. I said, really? And I like Chad. Like, I supported Chad and didn't see that coming. That was like the easiest fight that we ever negotiated right there. And I held him to every single word that he spoke. Every word.
- [58:07]
Ed Mylett
Hey, coming my way, my place.
- [58:09]
Andre Ward
So they get into training camp and because he's losing so much weight, his punch resistance isn't there. Edison Miranda can crack. Edison Miranda knocks him out in sparring. He was sparring, stuff starts to circulate. Verge comes to him. He said, listen, bae, he said, call me bae. Listen, bae, I'm not saying this to get you off track. We gotta stay focused. We're probably about two and a half, maybe three weeks away from the fight. Maybe about two and a half. He said, I'm hearing some things, man. I'm hearing that Edison Miranda, he knocked Chad out. Said, knocked him out. He said, knocked him out. Like they had to stop the sparring, help him up. And I was, that was it for the day. Now if you're a fighter, like, that's like the worst case scenario. It's one thing if you get knocked out in a fight, got small gloves on, no headgear, it happens. That's acceptable in some respects in sparring. Nah, nah, not if you're the top dude. There may be a sparring partner getting knocked out, but not the top guy, not the champion. That was a no. No. We started hearing rumors. So I'm kind of processing, like, man, he got knocked down, man, that's crazy. But in my mind, I'm always very much in my head, especially in training camps. I'm like, ah, maybe they're just floating out there to get in my head or trying to get me off track. That's what verbs, they said. But don't, don't, you know, don't worry about it too much. Just, you know, stay focused. We kept hearing stuff, kept hearing stuff. Nothing ever went on the airwaves, Nothing. Nothing on the Internet, Nothing. Press conference came the week of the fight. I'm thinking, man, I wonder if they gonna say something rumored, going to come out, if I'm going to be asked about it. It's never asked about it. The weigh in comes Friday, the fight Saturday. I said, now I'mma drop it on him now. I'mma drop it on him. We go face to face and his team, they're over there woofing. My team's kind of woofing a little bit. And I leaned in his ear and I said, hey, man, I heard what happened in that gym. I said, you, you better tighten it up tomorrow night. And you just see his shoulders just go. And he's got this look on his face like, how did you know.
- [60:14]
Dean Graziosi
I.
- [60:14]
Andre Ward
Won the fight with Chad Dawson right there.
- [60:16]
Ed Mylett
Oh, my gosh.
- [60:17]
Andre Ward
We turn and look at the cameras. Turn back and look at him before I walk off the stage. I broke him.
- [60:22]
Ed Mylett
You just knew.
- [60:23]
Andre Ward
Broke him.
- [60:24]
Ed Mylett
That is an awesome story.
- [60:25]
Andre Ward
He got away with it.
- [60:26]
Ed Mylett
He thought we didn't know.
- [60:28]
Andre Ward
It's too late. You can't get out of the fight now.
- [60:30]
Ed Mylett
That is awesome, man.
- [60:32]
Andre Ward
That was the only time I ever felt like I want to fight when I did that.
- [60:37]
Ed Mylett
Thank you for all of that insight of that and what it's like getting wrapped like.
- [60:40]
Andre Ward
Thank you I've ever told that story before.
- [60:42]
Ed Mylett
It's awesome. Well, we're keeping it in whether you want to or not. I'm keeping that one in there. No, that was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. Welcome back to Max out, everybody. I'm so honored and blessed to have this man to my left here today. He just came on my radar very recently, and God is so good because I immediately fell in love with this man and his message through social media, through YouTube, and within about a week of me discovering who he was, unbelievably, his name came across my desk with an opportunity to have a conversation with him today. And I think he's one of the most unique, influential people that I've ever heard from as a man. And it's really an honor to have you here today. He's an author, he's a speaker, he's a coach. But what he does is he really impacts people's lives, particularly men. But you women today that are listening to this or watching this, you get to listen in on a conversation. I think it'll help you understand your man, your son, your potential boyfriend or your husband even better today. So, Jason Wilson, thank you for being here.
- [61:46]
Jason Wilson
It's a pleasure. Thanks. Appreciate it.
- [61:48]
Ed Mylett
It's my honor. You're so soft spoken and gentle. You're such a big, strong man. Is this new? Is This a different you. In other words, even the way that you speak, there's a cadence. You got to be aware of this. There's a cadence. There's a cadence. There's an ease. There's a pace to it. I'm curious if, or maybe you don't even know was if I met you 20 years ago, was there. Did that exist? Was this always your disposition, so to speak, or has your disposition changed as you've been willing to share with yourself all of the emotions that a man should be experiencing?
- [62:24]
Jason Wilson
I've changed. I have to ask. I would like to ask Alexa. Let's ask her what you think he's changed.
- [62:30]
Ed Mylett
Even his. Kate, his daughter's here. She's off camera, guys. But I was curious. Even his disposition, because I've noticed this with myself. I've listened to audios of me 20 years ago. I still have a deep voice. I'm still aggressive. I still talk quickly. But there was a edge and an aggression to even the way I spoke that is somewhat different now. And Alexis, you see that people always.
- [62:49]
Fallon Taylor
Talk to me about his whisper.
- [62:51]
Ed Mylett
Yes, he has this whisper.
- [62:55]
Fallon Taylor
Okay, but that wasn't there.
- [63:00]
Ed Mylett
I got it. Okay. So those of you that can't hear Alexis, she's saying that he slows down. Even the way that he speaks is much different as he's changed. And I think that's an external manifestation of something that's happened internally within you. It's very noticeable with you. It's one of the things I noticed right away with you was that there's this strong man, visually very strong man, who is, frankly, strong enough to communicate in a very gentle and kind way that's pleasant to be with. It's not off putting to be with. And I just think all of you should know that over time. I think Jason's an example of just subtle changes. You may not even know, but your daughter knows, sitting here, change within you.
- [63:45]
Jason Wilson
I had no idea. You say cadence. I'm like talking about riding a bike.
- [63:49]
Ed Mylett
Somebody has no idea. It's the way that you're. Well, it's welcoming. It allows someone to sit with you and be present themselves. And I think when people become more vulnerable in the way they express themselves, it almost gives you permission in their presence to be that way. So. And the reason I say this is just dawning on me is that I have a son who's a kind young man. He's a gentle, pretty strong. Much bigger than me, much stronger. But I'd like to think that maybe a little bit of that Is because the he was fortunate enough that the former me isn't the one that raised him. That for the most part it was a guy who had done some of this work that raised him. And I just think it gives people permission to be in your presence. I want to share something with you and then ask you about it because I see this all over you. We have a more in common than you might think in that. When my left I played baseball. When I was done playing college, I was unemployed, just living at my parents house. My dad gets sober, he goes to his first AA meeting. My dad gets sober, comes back from the first meeting, says I got you a job. Turns out it was an orphanage. It was a boy's home. A big one though. My boys were all removed from their homes or their parents were incarcerated or dead. But what I discovered by working with these boys, I was their big brother. I took them to school. I was there when they opened presents on Christmas day, you know, took them trick or treating. I was there when they got in a fight at school or broke up with their girlfriend or whatever it was. People always ask me what do these boys want from you? And what I found from them was they wanted me to love them. They wanted someone to love them, care about them, believe in them and maybe just show them how to live a little bit better. And as I got older and I got into business, people said why did you have some success in business? Because that's what everybody wants all people want you to love them, they want you to care about them, they want you to believe in them, they want you to show them how to do a little better or help them. And I find that that's your over if I distill down your message. The reason I agree with it and love it so much is it appears to me that that's what you do.
- [65:44]
Jason Wilson
You know, I'm glad you said that because when I first started the cave of Adullam for boys it was just martial arts and discipline. Because although I rather I always tell men to reset to the lamb. No one wants to be in fight or flight response the whole time. When you gotta be tough and mean mugging the whole time. Can I go there? Absolutely. But if I could stay majority of the time here, this is where I want to be when I start working with the boys. And I was different, I was a different guy then. I was all about structure, discipline, toughness, fortitude. And I still am. However I want you to be comprehensive boot camp programs were very popular and scared straight programs were popular. Where you would take kids into school, into prison.
- [66:26]
Ed Mylett
Prisons.
- [66:26]
Jason Wilson
Yeah. And to get them scared enough to say, hey, I don't want to act up ever again. I discovered quickly, man, that re traumatizing someone never heals the trauma that you experience. Boot camp's program started failing at alarming rates, and I started shifting. I went from just a discipline program to a place where it's a safe space. And then I discovered that our boys didn't need more discipline. They needed more love. As soon as I gave them that, you know, our first program was in Highland Park, Michigan. If I was late, these boys, I'm talking about tough kids, they would sweep and clean the room, everything, move the desk out, and they would sit there purposefully so that I could see them and say, wow, that's great. You guys didn't know. They just wanted the affirmation. They wanted to love. That's why they act out. And that's what I give them. I give them what I longed for. I'm literally. I became what I wanted. And that's what it is. It's no secret. I became a man who's strong but sensitive, who's compassionate but caring. Someone who can encourage you when you need to push through some pain, but also encourage you to express sorrow. We need to apologize to someone or feel the grief so that you can do something to transform someone's life. If you're only stuck in just masculine attributes, you can see something wrong, but you say, no, I'm feeling something different. That ain't gonna. I won't be a man. So they shy away from that.
- [67:57]
Ed Mylett
So true.
- [67:57]
Jason Wilson
When we change as men, I say this, and I didn't say. You didn't say this. This world will change.
- [68:04]
Ed Mylett
You're right.
- [68:05]
Jason Wilson
When we can change, like, really become comprehensive, misogynistic behavior, I can go down the line, will change. And that's inside. Working from the inside out.
- [68:18]
Ed Mylett
Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Welcome back to Max out, everybody. I'm fired up about today's topic because we're going to talk about one of the things that I think is the most important things as it relates to winning. And it's one of the things that you can decide you're going to do without any natural giftedness, because it's the number one talent you must develop in order to win. And it's not talked about on social media. You're not going to get it in a personal development tape and a peak performance program, self help and any of it. Remember this. The best ability is availability. Did you hear that? The best ability is availability that you are available to win. Not enough people understand that this is an actual skill and talent. Most people in business or in life, whether it be relationships or the financial part of their life, they're always looking for these little tips and skills that you should develop. How to communicate better, how to be a better listener, how to suppress your ego, how to influence people, how to transfer energy. All these things that I teach. How to deal with failure. But I believe the greatest talent that you can draw a line through, all the people who have won, not all the people that went in business or life are unbelievable transfers of energy. Not all of them can close, not all of them can persuade. Not all of them are great listeners. Not all of them even dealt well with adversity. They did that the majority of the time. But all of them have in common. They develop the talent. And yes, it is a talent. It is a skill of not quitting. I don't think most of you right now that are struggling in your business life right now are giving yourself enough credit for this incredible talent you're developing, which is resiliency, which is the ability not to quit. Listen what I'm telling you. If somebody has built multiple different companies, I've coached some of the top athletes, entertainers, business people and politicians in the world. And I'm telling you that even in my own team, when I hire people, I look for resiliency. And a notch above that is the talent is the skill of not quitting. As the number one thing that I look for, and many of you right now listening to this, possess the number one skill necessary to win and don't give yourself any credit for it. Which means it's not helping build your confidence. It's not going to the bank of crediting for your identity. And so although you possess this incredible ability that so many people in the world don't have and don't possess, you have it. And you don't value it. You don't prize it. You don't give yourself credit for having it. It ought to be where you draw the majority of your confidence from the ability to say, I don't quit. I'm resilient. I own the number one skill, the number one talent required to eventually win. I already have. I can't quit. You'd have to kill me to get Me out of chasing my dream, right? So number one, I want to point it out as the number one gift. The best ability is availability. Do you have it? Have you decided to have it? Is it something you're going to possess the rest of your life? And those of you that do have it already, I need you to take an inventory, be aware of it and be intentional with crediting yourself as you're listening to this or watching it today, into the bank of your self confidence, into the bank, into the deposits you make in your identity. Because it has everything to do with winning. Every guest you've seen on my show, all the people that I've coached, all have different talents, skills and abilities. What's the one they all have? The ability to stay present, the ability to stay in the fight, to have not quit. You think, well that's not a big deal really. Because as I've been talking, millions of people made the decision to quit on their dream. Just as I've been talking to you the rest of the day. Millions more will tomorrow. Millions more. Every day, literally millions of people quit on one of their dreams, their dream relationship, their dream business, their dream body. So quitting has become the number one habit in the world by people that end up losing. And I'm telling you, it happens every day, every second, everywhere. Just the fact that while I've been speaking, you're still after your dream, you're ahead of them. You don't give yourself enough credit. Because eventually what I found, it looks like winning is this huge competition. But every day, every week, every year, every decade, as time goes by, you're going to find that you're competing with a smaller and smaller and smaller group of people for your dream because so many of them will just quit. And by the way, many of them that quit will possess talents, maybe even gifts you don't have. Their incredible ability with people, their incredible strength, their incredible brain, and they'll quit with all this giftedness. But you got the talent. You have to learn to distinguish between something that is a talent and a gift. You can develop skills, you can develop talents. Gifts are something you're born with. But the people that I see that win long term are the ones who develop the talents and skills required to win business. And life's a lot like a pinata. You know, I was at a barbecue, a birthday party for a five year old a while back and they did a pinata. Have you seen the pinata before? And it's an unbelievable metaphor for life. In fact, out of we had a call Today, life is like a pinata, because it really is. If you look at these kids at these parties, any of you that ever been to a pinata, you can picture it. They got the pinata there and what do they do? It's just like in business and life when you start something new, a new relationship, a new body, a new pursuit, a new business, right? What do they do? They take this little five year old and they blindfold him. They blindfold this little guy, right? And he can't see, he doesn't know where he's going. And then they spin them around, he gets completely disoriented, right? And then they hand him a bat. It's scary when you watch it. Don't you picture these little kids, right? You blindfold them, they spin them around, they become disoriented. Does that sound familiar to any of you that are trying to build a business right now? You're completely disoriented. You're blind, you don't know where to go. They spin this little guy around, they hand him a bat and they go hit the pinata. And the pinata is over to the right and they're swinging to the left. They're just whiffing, right? They're not even in the right direction. And then finally what do you do? You grab the little guy or the little girl and you turn them and you have them face the pinata. They were completely disordered. In fact, they were doing more damage to the people around them in the beginning with that darn bat you gave them. Because they're so disoriented. A lot of damage was done before they even faced the actual pinata. They've been blindfolded and spun around, right? They're completely disoriented. Doesn't that sound familiar? It's just like building your new business. It's just like trying to transform your body. It might be just like this brand new relationship you've got. And in fact, the people around them are in danger. In the beginning when you give these little guys this bat, maybe that sounds familiar. Maybe right now you're at this stage in your business or you've been there before, where there's been more damage done than there's been progress. You know what I'm talking about. The people around you have been more hurt by your new venture than benefited from it. Your relationship with them is not as good. Maybe financially you've hurt them or feel like you have. There's been a lot of damage. But what do we do with these little guys? We eventually take the little girl or little boy, and we point them in the right direction at the pinata. That's when you find Ed Mylett's podcast, you find his teachings, you find his YouTube channel or someone like me, and I can point you in the right direction. And then what do these guys do? They take the bat, and they're hitting the pinata as hard as they can, and they're hitting it, and they're hitting it, and they're hitting it, and no candy comes out. And they get tired, don't they? And they just. They can't go anymore. So what do you do? You get help, and you add a teammate, you add a friend. You take the blindfold off of you, and you get a little help. That help could be a new recruit in your business, a new employee, a new vendor. It might be a new mentor. And we put the blindfold on them, we spin them around, and then they're disoriented. They're swinging it. They're not even hitting the pinata yet. They're hurting the people around them. Then what do we do? We take them. We point them in the right direction. Now they're following my show or great teachings, and they hit the pinata as hard as they can. No candy comes out. You take another child, new teammate, new recruit in life, right? But in the pinata, says another child, you put a blindfold, spin them around, and they hit the pinata, and they're hitting it a as hard as they can. And it feels like no progress is being made. No candy's coming out, right? And eventually they're kitten it and hit it, and they get tired, and you think, man, how often they have to eat this pinata. What happens is sometimes the first few kids who hit the pinata, they kind of disappear from the party and start playing somewhere else. Maybe you've had that experience in your business. Some of the people you start with, they may not finish before the candy comes out. They may not be there, may not be there to celebrate, right? Some of the initial people disappear, and that could cause you to want to quit. But eventually, what happens with that pinata? Even though these kids are hitting the pinata and they're teaming up, they're all working together to try to make this candy come out. It doesn't look like it, but each shot on that pinata is putting them closer to the candy. Even though it doesn't seem like it, even though you can't see the candy, every blow is like a compound pounding effect. That pounding compounded by multiple people eventually can create a breakthrough. But what most people do is they leave the party before the candy comes out. That's true in business. Most people quit before the candy comes out. They don't stick around long enough. They got spun around. They get disoriented, they might hurt the people around. They get pointed in the right direction. They think they're making progress, then they don't. They think they're making progress, then they don't. And eventually, because no candy's coming out, no money, no change body, no amazing relationship, they stop swinging the bat at the pinata. But if you stick around for the party long enough, you know what always happens with a pinata? Eventually someone hits it, and bam, the candy comes out everywhere. And everyone celebrates and gets all the candy and dives on it and celebrates. Here's what I'm here to remind you of today. You got to stick around long enough for the candy to come out. You got to wait for the candy to come out of that pinata called your life, called your business, called your body, called your relationship. The vast majority of people in life don't stick around for the candy because they think as they're hitting the pinata of their life, they don't think they're making progress. It doesn't feel like progress. But I'm telling you, the number one ability is availability. And if you keep swinging away every day, even though it doesn't feel like it, you are getting closer to the candy. You're getting closer. It just doesn't feel like it. You know what I had? I had the ability to keep hitting the pinata in my life, to stick around long enough. And by the way, when you eventually win, it's not just you that gets all the candy, that gets all the victory, that gets all the money. Lots of people around you, many of which who you were hurting originally with that bat, many of them who were trying to talk you out of it, they get to celebrate in the candy, too. My prayer for you is that you begin to think about this analogy. The pinata of your life, the pinata of your business, the pinata of your body as you're swinging away. I'm here to tell you, even though it doesn't feel like it, you're getting closer to the candy. And if you can add more people to celebrate, it's okay that you feel disoriented. It's okay that it feels blinding and you don't know exactly what direction to go. Just like these precious babies with the pinata, it's okay that you Miss it once in a while. It's okay that you get tired once in a while, but as long as you keep after it, you keep pounding away that compound effort of your pounding. I can promise you there's candy someday and everybody around you will jump on it and celebrate. That's my wish for you today as you listen to me. Of all the skills I'm going to teach you that I've taught you, and if you've not listened to my other shows, I teach about listening, transfer energy, how to close, how to change your identity, how to live blissfully dissatisfied, how to unlock your success code. All of the very detailed things I teach today is the most important thing, is that as you learn all these skills, it'll help you with the blindness. Every single skill you learn, you'll see clearer and clearer and clearer. But if you don't develop the talent, the number one skill in the world, which is to keep hitting the pinata and to stick around until the candy comes out. Because here's the deal. Someone's gonna get the candy. In life, there's always candy in life. That pinata eventually always breaks down. Do you want to be the person who was there in the beginning, hitting as hard as you could and sacrifice it, maybe hurting the people around you and never get the candy? Or are you going to get something for your pain? Are you going to get something for your effort? Are you going to get something for this sacrifice you're making? You got to get something for this pain. You got to stick in the game until the candy comes out, and then we all get to celebrate. That's what I want you focused on today. I promise you. There's a pinata in your life, and right now, many of you feel blind and disoriented, maybe even hurting the people around you. Some of you are past that phase and you're hitting your thing hard every day, but there's no candy yet. I promise you there's going to be a payoff for you. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to Max out, everybody. Today's awesome. I just reached out to this man. I said, hey, brother, I think the world needs a little bit more of Dean and Ed. And everywhere I go, people bring up the time that we've spent together on our other show as one of their favorite, if not their favorite show that I've Ever done. And this man here is a friend of mine. But beyond that, I just want you know, he's an incredibly financially successful person. We were just talking about some of the great things happening in his life off camera. I think he's one of the most articulate and brilliant people in all of the entrepreneur life strategy, personal development space. And he approaches it in a way that's different than everybody else. There's a kindness that exudes out of this man, a gentleness yet strength that no one else has. He's also somebody that many of the other people in the space go to for personal advice and for counsel. He's just a good man. He's a great husband. He's a wonderful father, and I count him as a friend and somebody that I admire greatly. So, Dean Graziosi, thank you for being here today, brother.
- [81:41]
Dean Graziosi
Thank you for that beautiful introduction. I feel the same way about you, Ed. We met each other a little bit before the podcast, and it was like we were bonded brothers and forever after that. And it was a great show. And I still get hit up on a regular basis.
- [81:51]
Ed Mylett
I know you do.
- [81:51]
Dean Graziosi
There was something magical about that show because we get hit up all the time about it. So it's good to be here with you.
- [81:56]
Ed Mylett
One thing that's a lot of people are listening to this, and they know they've got that thing. They're not working out like they should. Maybe they are in that text thing. Maybe it's that they don't eat the way they should. They don't make the contacts they should. They're not up as early they got a thing, but they're winning in spite of it, right? In spite of it. They've got some winning going on. Because in spite of the fact for many years, Dean, that you weren't as congruent as you wanted to be, you were still producing financial success massively. Massively. But what's happened the last four or five years is your life has become a freaking rocket ship in terms of influence, you guys, Dean's been famous a long time. You go back to all the infomercial days. If you've not seen Dean or you hear this voice, it's because Dean was all over television forever, very successful in that space, in the influence space, the real estate space, as he was not congruent in every area of his life. But, man, the last four or five years. So speak to that if you can solve that thing you got. It's like a football team who's got no running game, man. If they could Just run the football. They've already got a good passing game. Their defense is good. They're a playoff team already. But if they could run the football, they're going to win the Super Bowl. There's always that thing, right? True or false?
- [83:06]
Dean Graziosi
Okay, I love this question. I love hanging out with you, man. And thank you for everybody listening. I know you have lots of opportunity options. So thanks for hanging out with two friends talking about stuff where I had no idea what we were talking about. So this is really cool. Here's what I know what happens sometimes. I'll tell you what I did for a decade. If we're going to talk about relationships, I'll be completely transparent. I thought about leaving my relationship every day of my life for five years. It was almost the first thing I thought about every day. Not because she's a bad human in any way. There were just. It just wasn't the right fit. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but it just didn't fit. But here's what I did for years. I was financially successful at the time. I thought I was the best dad possible, even though I wasn't showing them the best example. But I thought, I'm an engaged father. I coach Little League, coach softball. I'm there. I bring them to school, make them lunches, love them to death. I'm a great leader to my team. I'm a good friend to people who need me. So my relationship's off and I'm not congruent. I should be freaking fortunate. So who gets it all? This is what I remember. Who? Oh, you want it all, Dean. You want love and congruency and a good dad and financially free. And I remember just thinking, stop being greedy if your relationship doesn't work. But really, what I was doing, it is. I wasn't facing something because it was scary to me. It was scary leaving my kids. I'm not thinking. Thinking of not being with my kids every single day was like a shot in the gut. And I just ignored it and avoided it. And it grew. It grew to where I didn't become the man that I was supposed to be. Listen, whatever. You believe in, God, the universe. I believe in God. And I believe God has created you to be bigger, better and stronger than you currently are. No matter where you are in your life, God wants you to be the woman you were meant to be, the man you were meant to be. And if you believe in confidence, whatever your beliefs are, you are meant to be more. And when you let one of those areas build, it doesn't go away. I don't care how much I try to push it down on the inside. It just kept growing. And you feel that you're looking away from it, even though it's there. And I want you to think about this when you have to. Some things are difficult. You might have to face a change of a business, a change of a business partner, change of a job, change in a relationship. The thing that you've been avoiding is growing, even though you think it's not. And it's like got roots, and the roots are creeping over into all areas of your life, and you don't know, and you're working harder, stronger, faster to overcome this, and you think you're conquering it. If you're in a relationship, that's not good. And maybe you go to the strip club or you text on your phone or you do something and you think you're fulfilling it. You're not. You're just letting. Letting the roots grow in deeper and stronger. And you're working twice as hard to be successful, and you don't even realize it. And here's the way I looked at it when I decided, or we decided to get a divorce. And you can use this analogy. You can tell I got some silly analogies. You can use this in any area of your life. Picture your ship is in a bay. It's calm. The water's calm. There's other great ships in the bay. The weather's kind of beautiful, it's kind of nice. But you know, you're not meant to to be in that bay, but, man, it just has all the signs where you're supposed to be there. But the only way out of that bay is you got to sail your ship through the storm that's out in the ocean. And you're watching the storm, and you're watching how turbulent it is. You're in the bay, and it's comfortable. But the only way to your next level, the only way to break through, the only way to get rid of those roots, to kind of crush that thing that you're avoiding or afraid of, is you got to sail your ship through the storm. You see the storm. It's turbulent, the waves are high, the sky is dark. And you're not even sure because you've never navigated that territory. You don't have a map because you've never been there. You've never experienced it. And the way I looked at it when I was going through a divorce is I was so scared for my kids. Not me being alone, but scared on how that would work out. My kids, that a lot of times I put my ship in the storm, it got bumpy, and I went back to the bay. And I'll tell you, when I finally said, I can't be the man. I'm supposed to be staying in this harbor, even though it's pretty and there's great people around, and it's going through that storm, going through the changes, the navigating of new territory. You're mapping out new territory on the fly, and your ship's going down, and you want to turn back 100 times. But there's this moment, and it happened to me when I went through a divorce. There was this moment where I didn't know if I could, and I was scared for my kids, and I was having anxiety attacks. But I want to share with you, there was this moment that my ship landed on the other side of the storm, and it was over. And I was a different human. I was a different man. I looked through a different lens. I had a new map, and I realized I wasn't meant for that other bay. Yes, it was safe. Yes, it was okay. But listen, at the end of our lives, do we want to be okay? Right? And when I got to the other side, it was this fresh start. I found a way to be friends with my ex. I found a way for my kids to be safe. I found a way to replace quantity with quality. With my children, I found a way to be a better version of me and attract Lisa in my life. And when those roots were gone, this is what I want to share with all of you for that one area of your life that you know what I'm talking about. As you're hearing this, you're picturing it, and you're going, wow, nobody really knows that I do that when no one's watching. Nobody knows that. I'd like to fix that. No one knows that. I kind of BS everybody else and say I'm working on it, but I'm not. I want to tell you, when they go away, your sailboat turns into a ship with five engines on it. Like, my life exponentially grew. I became a better dad, a better leader, a better friend. I had more compassion, had more empathy. I replaced anger with compassion. And things just. I just became a different. I mean, I think I was a good man 10 years ago, but I wouldn't recognize him. I'm not the same human today, and that allowed me to go faster. And I just encourage you. You've heard this before, but your next level lives on the thing on the other side of the thing, you're avoiding, the other thing you're afraid of. And, Ed, I think I heard you say this. You know, all of us, we get to learn from each other and listen to each other. And I'll go listen to a podcast when I need a little. I'll listen to a little Ed Mylett or watch. But I remember somebody saying, it may have been you, but what drives me to fix those pieces, guys, and I want you to hear this. The business that you want to scale, start the relationship you want to fix or end, the parenting style that you've gone so long doing it one way, you think it's too late, and you got to fight for it. It's worth the fight. Whatever it is the fight. I just want to tell you, I picture I've always pictured being at the end of my life and having a conversation with God. And he said, how did it go? Right? Always picture that. And I always have the fear of going, well, you know, I was in a good relationship, right? Or things were okay. You know, I was great at my business, great at impacting lives, and I did this. I was a good dad. What about your relationship? It was okay. Like, I picture saying that to someone where we have this creation given to us, this opportunity, and I feel like this inner disappointment where I'd want to scream and go, you know, know what? Damn it, can I do that over? And you don't get that chance. You don't get that chance. Like, you don't get a do over, and you'd want to. So I put those emotions of my future back on me. Things you've again already heard. And I think I heard this from you, Ed, or someone, but I heard someone put that on a whole other level. Could you imagine if God pulled out his iPhone and said, ed, I appreciate all you've done and you've served and you give. And that one area of life is. Can I play you a quick video of the man you could have been?
- [90:35]
Ed Mylett
That's my stuff.
- [90:36]
Dean Graziosi
Yeah, that is yours. I knew I heard that from you. When I heard that from you, Ed, it changed it. Honestly, took what I had been. I had been telling myself my last conversation with God. And when I heard that from you, I've shared that, and I feel that all the time. And if I didn't, I want to share this with you guys, and I hope it's relating to where you are in your life right now. If you're looking for what's going to drive you, what's going to take you to the next level. How do you move your lighthouse out? How do you wake up compelled again, not just want to chill? And how do you find that, that. That. That thrive, that. That energy, that zest for life again? I just want to share with you that if I didn't sail my ship out of that harbor, that safe harbor, and go through. I'm not. I'm. I'm understating what I went through. I don't take aspirin. When I was going through a divorce, worrying about my kids, I was popping Xanax three days a week because I couldn't control. I was drinking a glass of wine five nights a week because I couldn't put myself to sleep. So I'm understating how bad I was for a short period of time. When I was in the middle of that storm, I thought of turning back because I felt so crappy about myself and worried about my kids so much. But I want to tell you, on the other side, I never would have experienced what real love could be like. I have love in a way that I wish it for every single one of you. There's nothing I can even share that compares to. To having a true soulmate that's got your back, that supports you and loves you, and you feel the same where you don't keep score and you got each other's back, I never would have experienced that if I didn't go through the storm. And whatever that storm is for you, you have to have that compelling future. And you have to say steadfast and realize if you go back to where you were, you'll get more of what you used to have.
- [92:11]
Ed Mylett
That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. All right, welcome back to the show, everybody. So the man that we're going to talk with today is a very important man to me. There are not five people on planet Earth that I would rather speak to today than this young man. And my dream list for people that would be on this podcast, he is at the very, very top of the list because he's a story of resiliency, faith, strength, comeback. And you all know his story. On January 2, 2023, with about 5 minutes and 58 seconds left in the game against the Cincinnati Bengals, my dear friend here tackled wide receiver. T. Higgins was running with the ball. He hit Demar and in the chest with his helmet. And demar made the tackle as he always does. And he got up after that tackle, stood up for a second, and then collapsed on the field. And in that moment, our country was captivated. And literally hundreds of millions of people were in prayer for this precious young man. I don't know that I've ever said this and meant it more. I am so grateful that you are here today, and welcome to the show. Damar Hamlin. Good to have you here, brother man.
- [93:35]
Damar Hamlin
Thanks for having me. I appreciate, you know, the intro, you know, you. You've talked to, you know, some of the. The biggest and the best across the world, you know, so to be in that, you know, top five that you want to talk to, it's. It's, you know, it's honor. So I'm glad to be here, glad to believe.
- [93:50]
Ed Mylett
You know, what I'm curious about is, do you have any imposter syndrome about all this? You know, as my platform grew, more and more people started listening to me. You know, I was like, man, if they knew how much of this stuff I'm still working on, trying to figure out. You know, everyone's looking at me for advice, and I'm. I'm still trying to figure out this or that or the other thing. And it took me a while to accept that God will use my imperfections and the things I don't know and the fact that I'm more like most people than not to connect me with them, that I don't have to be. I don't have to have every answer. I don't have to know everything. I finally can, you know, dawned on me that it's okay that all. That I'm not perfect. You know, they don't have it all figured out. Is there any party that's like, God, why me? Like, I mean, I'm still. I'm in my mid-20s. I'm trying to figure all this stuff out myself. Is there. Is there any part of you that feels that way, or do you just accept the anointing and the calling and you go with it?
- [94:45]
Damar Hamlin
You know, maybe two times over this last year, in two months, have I ever decided to, like, you know, let myself have a feeling of why me? You know, and it's natural, you know, it's. It's supernatural. And a lot of it came with football because I truly loved the game of football. You know, football was truly my piece away from the world. You know, I would go to practice, I would have so much going on in my personal life in college, like arguing with girlfriends and dealing with class, and I'm probably arguing with my parents about something. Just being a young college kid, like my whole entire life is chaos. But I come to practice for these two and a half hours and I am at peace. I feel like I'm sitting at the beach listening to the waves, you know, while I'm at practice. Because I truly love the process of getting better, you know, but to have that snatched away from you, you know, and then have the space where you truly had your peace and now you're facing your fears in that space and having to overcome that whole feeling, you know, it was, it was, it was something that, you know, I. I really had to work for, you know, but, you know, I only asked myself, why me? Maybe two times in the whole time. And then I will always just correct myself. And, you know, I understand why. You know, I. I truly know that God see me as somebody who was, you know, doing his work. You know, I was out here. And I don't. I don't mean to say that, like I'm the most spiritual person in the world or, you know, like I don't remember the last time I showed up for church on a Sunday. You know what I mean? Just my personal life is busy. I have a lovely church that I do go to back at home in McKees Rock, Pennsylvania. But, you know, I don't remember the last time that I showed up to church on Sunday. So I don't want to even seem like I'm this perfect person or I was this perfect person, you know, that God just selected me because I was above all else. Now, like you said, I'm more like everybody than I'm not. But, you know, I was truly doing right by people. I clapped for others while I waited my turn. I learned from the people before me. I supported everyone. And I truly let my heart walk into every room before I did. With no expectations in return, you know? With no expectations in return. That's just because of how I was raised, you know, and I was truly a kid that, you know, I.
- [97:15]
Dean Graziosi
I.
- [97:16]
Damar Hamlin
Found God within my own personal life. You know what I mean? I grew up. I grew up a Christian kid and I went to a Catholic high school, you know, and it was like. It was like, you know, within that journey, I had to figure out what this relationship meant to me. And through that process, you know, I truly developed my own relationship and I formatted all of the goals that I want to accomplish my life off of that relationship. And, you know, I never asked my. I tried to never ask myself or let myself, you know, get the Perspective of why me? Because I know why me? Because I was doing the work and I was. I was moving right by people. And, you know, who better than me, you know? And, you know, I don't. I don't want to take credit away from no one else, but, you know, I don't know if. If anyone would have, you know, been able to handle the situation like this. So, you know, just thinking about that.
- [98:06]
Ed Mylett
Yeah. By the way, you're right. I did the other thing. You know, when you look at God's work, in hindsight, it always usually kind of lines up once you look at it. The other thing that's really obvious to me tomorrow, I'll just tell you, is that God chose somebody who could be a great communicator of this message. He chose a guy who's really good with words. And not only are you good with words, but when you say things, there's an energy transfer, there's an impact, there's an emotion when you say things. That's rare when someone's gifted with the athleticism you've been gifted with and clearly the IQ you've been gifted with, to also have the ability to communicate on the fly like you do is a very rare thing. And it's clear that I really believe that you were chosen for this. I just really do. I have to tell you, as a parent, I watched a conversation your mom had. Your mom was at the game and was trying to get to you, as I understand it. Is that correct?
- [98:58]
Damar Hamlin
Yeah, she was my mom and my dad.
- [99:01]
Ed Mylett
Yeah. I'm just wondering. I asked you how it's affected you or changed you. What about how it's affected the people around you and their lives or even the way they interact with you? I'm wondering. I mean, obviously the attention you got is crazy. Every athlete and famous person in the world's talking about you all the time. Time. But I've, you know, you know this. When you're a college player, it's one thing. You get to the NFL, the world changes around you a little bit. Right? Like, just the way the world responds to you is different when you're not well known and then you're famous, when you're poor compared to when you're rich. So I have to imagine when you're alive and then you're not for a few minutes and then you're alive again, that the way the world treats you might change a little bit. Has it changed a little bit the way the world reacts to you?
- [99:48]
Damar Hamlin
Yeah, definitely, man. You know, the first. The first way is people are touched. Like people are truly touched. And like some people, like people see me, they just want to hug. Like people see me, they want to, you know, tell me a little bit about their story or you know, somebody that they know or how they were affected or some things that they're going through personally, you know. So people are touched in all kind of different ways. And you know, even outside of the situation, people see my mission, you know, people see the mission that I've been on even greater now, you know, and that's a part of, you know, the blessings because you know, within my immediate family, nothing has changed. Like my mom, my dad, me, my brother, we're all still the same people, you know, like this hasn't my mom and dad, once I decided to play football again, they're like, okay, this is what we're doing and this is what you decided to do and we're 110 behind you, you know, like whichever way it was, you know, they was going to be 110% behind me, you know, so my parents haven't changed a bit. They're on my back just like I was in college. They're not, you know, they're not cutting me any slack. They're not, you know, the expectations aren't different. If I still come home and you know, I spend some time at my parents house, I'm gonna be taking out the trash, doing dishes, I'm gonna be vacuuming the living room floor. Like, you know, so you know, my immediate family thank God that, you know, everything is still the same there. But you know, it has caused a little bit of trouble, you know, within like friendships and things like that to where, you know, some people feel obligated to, you know, be around me more or, you know, it, it, it's, it's all over the place. I try to not focus on it. But you know, when it's the personal people around you that you grew up with that you wanted to be spending the rest of your life with that you thought would be in your wedding, you know, it has a little bit of effect on you, you know, so. But you know, the people that truly love me and love me with no expectation behind it are all still in my life. They're all still the same people with me and we're enjoying life and we all have a different perspective and a different appreciation for life. For sure.
- [102:05]
Ed Mylett
It.