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Ed Mylett
So, hey guys, listen. We're all trying to get more productive and the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth based environment, that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love Growth Day. Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Burchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down. Growthday.com forward/ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way, he's asked me, I post videos in there every single Monday that gets your day off to the right start. Got about $5,000, $10,000 worth of courses that are in there that come with the app. Also, some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content in there on a regular basis, like having the avengers of personal development and business in one app. And I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis. And I do. So go over there and get signed up. You're going to get a free tuition, free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also. So go to growthday.com forward/ed. That's growthday.comed. your data is like gold to hackers. They'll sell it to the highest bidder. Are you protected? McAfee helps shield you blocking suspicious texts, malicious emails and fraudulent websites. McAfee Secure VPN lets you browse safely and its AI powered tech scam detector spots threats instantly. You'll also get up to $2 million of award winning antivirus and identity theft protection, all for just $39.99 for your first year. Visit mcafee.com/incancel anytime terms apply. This is the Ed Milet Show. All right, welcome back to the show, everybody. Very grateful you decided to join me again this week. And I know that this week's gonna help you again very much in your life. What I'm gonna talk about this week is some of the invisible things that successful people do that the unsuccessful or the average and ordinary don't do. And oftentimes it's invisible. You can't really see it if you're not knowing to look for it. It's not taught in success classes and personal development certainly isn't taught in school. And if you don't have somebody like me tell you about this. You'll miss it. And so here's one of the things that I know to be true after 54 years now, almost on this earth, the successful people and success in general, there is a pace to it that most people don't understand. There's a cadence and a rhythm to success. Oftentimes you can have all the tools, have all the words to say, know all the strategies and the tactics, and it's just missing still. And I believe that's an energy thing. I think energy is the highest form of influence in the world. And when you're around a real winner, person who really moves things in life, moves the needle, you know, just seems to. Their will ends up happening. They're just in this concert with God in some way that you're like, wow, they just got it going, or they make you feel a certain way. It's energy. And there's a pace and a rhythm to successful people. Some people don't have enough of it. You know, they're just. They don't bring energy to the table. They just. They lack it. They. Most people are even oblivious to the fact that they're bringing any energy. So that's one person. That's most people. Then there's the other ones who try too hard. You know what I mean? They just buzz too quickly. They're too close up, they're too fast, they're too much energy. And it's almost like they've read too many books on bringing energy to the table. And so I want to talk today about this, because you need to remember this. You're always making people feel something. People respond to what they feel. It's not what they hear or see. That's like 10, 15% of it. It's what they feel. Think about yourself. When you meet somebody new, you get a feeling, don't you? Like, ooh, I really like this person. They're trustworthy, they're kind, or I want to be around them again. Other people you meet, you go, I don't know exactly what it is, but I'm not comfortable with them. Or sometimes you're like, ooh, something about their energy, right? So you're feeling it all the time. You're feeling it even when you check out at the grocery store with the checker, you're feeling their energy for a second. Now, I think very successful people have more energy sensitivity than others. And so I will just tell you, like, for me, I'm always feeling energy around people. Are they happy? Are they sad? I'm kind of weird like that. Like, even a flight attendant, I'll just kind of watch them walk by and I'll think, where's their energy today? Not what they're saying, because they're supposed to say, welcome to Delta Airlines or welcome to the restaurant. They say the right things. I don't listen to what people say. I listen to them like they're a silent movie. I don't listen, I watch, I feel. And so remember this energy is influence. And typically speaking, the person with the highest energy wins. Energy, vibrational frequency, etc. Is influence. Now, we could get into physics. I've talked about this on the show before, that literally it moves matter. Okay, but we're going to talk about it in general today with you. Really be conscious of your energy going forward. If you wanted to change your life, the number one gift I would give you, assuming you already have faith, is your energetic connection to other people and the energy that you put out and your consciousness of it. It'd be the number one thing I would give you more than any tactics, strategy, cold plunge, thought process, mindset, breathing technique, visualization tactic, you name all the stuff. It would be an energy shift. And then ask yourself this in terms of feeling energy, is your default state to let your energy be fed and fueled by things that happen in your life, or is it to be weakened and let it get weakened and reduced? And I know there's a lot of content out there in personal development that says, hey, you're basically great as you are. You don't need to change at all. Really? Is that why you came to this content, because you want to be validated for where you are? You know, a lot of content creators, and I believe everybody can help somebody, but they do this because they don't really have any tactics or strategies that could help you. And what they want is likes and they want you to like them. And so the easiest thing to say to somebody, and I think it's cruel who's come to say, I want help is to go, oh, you don't need any help. You're just great the way you are. Well, there's a difference between love and liking ourselves. And you wouldn't say that to your children who you love if they brought home Ds and you knew they were capable of A's, you, you would challenge them to do better. You wouldn't just tell them you're great as you are, keep getting Ds unless that was their capacity. And oftentimes, I believe leaders and content creators in general, appease people because they truly don't believe in them. Well, I don't have that. I believe in you. I believe you can do better. I believe you can be happier. And so do you. And so there's also the other notion out there right now. It's like, hey, just let everything roll off your back. You think Michael Jordan let things roll off his back? Do you think any great people just said, hey, whatever, Heck no. They use it as fuel. And so what I'm asking you to begin with, there's different types of fuel and energy we're going to talk about is your fuel. When things happen to you that aren't good, does it fuel you add fuel, make you stronger, or does it take it away from you? So that is not true that it's, we don't need to change. And it's not true that everything should just roll off your back. And you know that and you know it. And so, in fact, I don't know anybody successful that operates that way. Not one single person. What I know is the successful people are constantly looking for more fuel. Oh yeah, you don't think I can do it? Let me show you. You want to talk about me? Let me prove you the other way. Keep saying, keep bringing it. Keep talking because eventually you're going to be watching, right? Michael Jordan played his butt off every night and he was constantly looking to get slighted. He'd make up stories. Tom Brady won seven Super Bowls and this guy was still talking about being a 6 round draft pick when he was 43 years old. Constantly looking for a reason to get inspired, a reason to be fueled. Coaches put press clippings up all the time. Do you think I don't care where your political affections lie? Whether you're like an Obama person or a Trump person? You think those people were looking for fuel? You think all, they just let it all roll off their back? You think they thought they were great as they were? Heck no. They wanted to fight. They wanted free fuel in their lives. I could tell you in my own life, you think I can't do something that fuels me? You? I, I remember when I started in business, everyone talking bad, even my family, even my dad going, hey, why don't you just get a real job? And he did it because he loved me. I'm like, I'm going to prove it. I want to use things as fuel. And so I want to tell you, you can either play the victim mentality where you're weak and everything that happens to you takes from you, right? And that's too many of you. And I love you, man. When someone talks bad, it takes from you. You got to use it as fuel. When negative things happen or a client quits or someone on your. You know, many people I've had in my business go, hey, man, I just don't think we're going to make it. I'm out. I'm like, really? Okay, well, in the beginning, that stuff used to demoralize me. Then finally I'm like, you know what? Okay, you think we can't make it? Well, watch when we do. And you know what? I love seeing those people now. It's awesome. I love the naysayers, right? I love people who talk smack in the beginning they talking anymore, right? You got to use stuff as fuel. Don't let people that you're watching convince you that you can't get better and you can't grow. It's okay to take a few things where you go, hey, I want it bad. I'm going to use this as leverage. Trust me, I know. I've had them on my show. I've coached a lot of them. Top athletes, top CEOs, top politicians. Right? Top financial people. They use things as fuel. They actually look for it. You want to offend me? I'm glad to be offended, right? You want to underestimate me. Here's one thing about you I can promise you, because I love you. I'm talking to you like a brother, aren't I? Right? This is the truth and you know it. Hey, people are underestimated you for a long time, haven't they? They don't know how damn strong you could be. Now, the last thing you can do right now is underestimate yourself. Don't you let anybody tell you that you can't grow, that it's okay just the way you are. You know better. That's why you came to the content in the first place. There's a part of you all your life that said, I want to be somebody. I want to do something great with my life. I know there's more in me. I know I can be happier. I know I can help more people. I know I can grow. I know I can contribute. I may not know how, but I know I can. I'm not satisfied with where I am. I love me, but I want to grow and get better. I don't really think you can love yourself unless you know yourself. And I don't think you can know yourself if you're not truly being yourself. And so I like hearing stuff like that. Or you can just hear this, eat this old, big old cake of BS that everyone's feeding you all the time. So you're listening. You can listen to people that have theories, or you can listen to people that have built something, right? I don't even know what some of these folks that have built. And some people have built things. They can't even tell you how they did it. But do you think Michael Jordan let things roll off his back? How about Elon Musk? How about Joe Rogan? Dwayne Johnson? Serena Williams, Martha Stewart? Barbara Corcoran? These people are competitors. Life is competitive. Business is competitive. There's levels to this game. You got to get a little bit competitive. You say, well, I'm just not that competitive. That's a lie. Yes, you are. You're at least competitive with yourself. See, it comes down to you're going to go through Jesus Christ. Guess what? He believes so deeply in what he was going for, which is salvation for you, that he was willing to die for it. Romans 12, verse 2 says. This verse says, do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Whether you're a Christian or not, you got to renew your mind. You got to start to look at adversity as fuel, setbacks as energy, and then guess what else? We live in a world that's constantly trying to shape us into something we're not. It's easy to get caught up in societal pressures and lose sight of ourselves. Romans 12, verse 2 encouraged us to break free from these patterns, that we're not a victim, that I'm not going to be average and ordinary, that this life is not just for the people from the right side of the tracks, that I'm going to have setbacks, that doesn't mean it's not worth it. Your setback can be a setup for your comeback. And I won't be quoting scripture to you all the time. But Proverbs 16, verse 3 says these words, commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he'll establish your plans. Partner up with God. Get fired up and excited about your life. If he's with you, nobody can be against you. But you got to compete. Listen, successful people want it more. They get fueled more. They want to get after it. They want to be somebody and they want to prove the doubters wrong. Okay, the doubters are wrong about you, not right. The people who are telling you that you can't grow or, hey, it's all right, whatever happened. No, it's not. And you know it's not. Might feel good to hear that crap, but you know darn well you're supposed to step up and do something great with your life. Any slight. Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Barack Obama, Donald Trump, Elon Musk. Heck, take any great mom out there. Listen to me on this. Any great you moms, any great moms. What happens when some kids bullying your kid at school or some teachers not being fair to your kid? Do you just go, yeah, it's all right. What do you do? You protect that baby of yours. I remember when we had kids when they were little, man, someone messed with our kids. You didn't want to mess with mama. You did not want to mess with a mama protecting her baby. And you dads out there, especially you dads with little girls, what if some teenage boy decided he was going to break your daughter's heart, huh? You're there to protect and you know darn well it's not okay. It's not okay. Life is about resisting adversity, not accepting it. Life is about resisting it. Life's about stepping up and pushing through obstacles and seeing how great you can get on the other side. It's using it as a leverage. Now knowing most people are going to go the other way, they're going to let it beat them down. They're going to begin to believe it. Let me say the other thing to you. When you're a competitor, here's some things you need to know. You got to talk faster, you got to move faster, got to pick up the pace. One thing I'm always telling people when they're around me, man, pick up the pace, pick it up. It's got to be faster, faster. Speed, speed, matter speed to market, speed to execution. Like, I think you learn a lot about somebody, but they're not in too big of a hurry because that can be off putting too. But most people's default speed, they're in too. They're not in a big enough hurry. Their meetings are too slow, they walk too slow, they think too slow, they process too slow. Not at the top, man. Not at the top. I know a lot of you are saying, hey, Ed, your content. Lately you've been intense. I am intense. Because I want you to win. I don't know how long I'm going to be doing this, right? I don't know how long I'm going to do it, but I know this. I'm going to tell you the truth. I've won. I've watched a lot of other people win. I've coached A lot of winners. I've had a lot of them on my show. There's a through line. They're in a bigger hurry. They compete. They bring big energy. They look for leverage. It's okay. They will find reasons to push through. They protect. They fight for their dreams. By the way, you can do all this and be a nice person. You can do all this and smile. Some of the most competitive people I know, I'm thinking of a few of the ladies I know in business. Boy, some of the nicest people I know, they want to kick your butt, man. They want to win so bad. They do it with a smile, man. Thinking of a few of them right now. You don't want to mess with them. You got to pick up the pace. You got to get in a bigger hurry. There's a rhythm to this thing. You ever watch? You ever go to a wedding? I'm probably that guy, by the way, that I'm about to describe. You ever go to a wedding? You're like, hey, man, this dude's got some moves. You know what I'm saying? That guy at the wedding, but he's totally off rhythm. You know, the dude, somehow he's been watching enough YouTube videos, he's figured some stuff out, but he's just off rhythm. He's dancing to the lyrics, not the beat, you know, I'm talking about. That's most people in personal development, they've learned the steps. They're just not in rhythm. They're not on beat. It's not quite fast enough. It's not quite what it needs to be. When I meet people immediately, I feel their energy, don't you? And I can tell whether they're a winner pretty quickly. Most people aren't conscious of the energy they bring. They're conscious of the Word they're going to say. They're conscious of the clothes they're wearing, they're conscious of their hairstyle, and yet they're oblivious to the energy part. Do you have a successful energy? Do you have a presence about you, A quiet confidence about you? If you say, I don't have those things, Ed, here's what I would challenge you to do. Model somebody who does. There's nothing wrong. I'm not saying copy model. I have modeled many people in my life until the style and nuance became my own, you know, and then I focus on the fact that I'm doing good. Philippians 4:13. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. But I love Galatians 6, 9, last scripture. I'll give you, I promise you. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap if we do not give up. All right. Pants I'm wearing pretty comfy, fit me really well. Can't show you quite on the camera here and if you're on audio it wouldn't matter anyway. Guess where I got them quints. 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Explore the Range Rover sport@range rover.com US sport don't grow weary of doing good work. Remember this competition drives innovation. If you take competition out of the marketplace, there's no innovation. So competition is a good thing. This is what successful people understand. They want to compete, they want to be recognized. They want a scoreboard. And some of you say, I don't want. You want a scoreboard in your life when this thing's over. You know darn well when this life is over of yours, you want to go, man, I did it, man, I won. I became everything I could be. I saw it all that I could see. I helped everybody that I could. I've got the most rich memories of my life. I felt the emotions I wanted. I got out of this life what I wanted. And ironically, here's another step for the successful people. Let me just say this to you. You could have a huge sense of urgency. It's got to be urgent, right? It's there. It's just more urgent for the ones. We got to do it now, right? Get around the successful people, they got an unreasonable standard. They're just unreasonable. They're demanding and. And yet at the same time, they have this amazing ability for delayed gratification. When they make a bunch of money, they don't spend it. When they start to get a little bit of success, they don't celebrate prematurely. They delay the gratification part because it wasn't about the gratification. It was about the process. It was about the cause, it was about the good work. You have to have this ability to be in a huge hurry, yet delay the gratification. Don't spend the money you make, right? Don't give away your gains too early. It's something I watch all the time. It's like people slow down. They're in real estate, they close seven sales, they go take a three week vacation. It's like, no, you got momentum. This is where you pour it on. Have a sense of urgency, compete. Delay the gratification part. Everybody sees everything on social media and Instagram. It's all about the celebration. It's all about. That's not the real stuff. The real stuff is in the grind. The real stuff is in the doing. The real stuff is awesome. Delay the gratification. Run up, up the score a little bit. The pace is faster. You just can't slow down. It's like, it's like doing an extra set. It's like, just do one more. You know, a lot of people rationalize, well, I could do it tomorrow. Yeah, I had a good workout, so I'm done. Well, I'm not. I remember one time I'LL never forget this. I was at the gym and as I was much bigger, there's a young guy in front of me. We were both doing shrugs and I had, you know, decent sized traps at the time, but this dude's traps made me look ridiculous. He just, huge dude, young kid too. Probably like 20 years younger than me. And I said to him, I'll never forget this. I've only been embarrassed in the gym a few times, but I was embarrassed. And I said to him, he was doing his shrugs, real heavy shrugs. I was trying to do the same weight as him to look cool. And I said, hey man, let me ask you a question, man, your traps look awesome. So do your lats, by the way, from doing your back. I said, how many of those do you do? He goes, what? I said, those sets you're doing, how many are you doing? And he looked at me like almost disgusted. And he goes, until I can't. I said, what? He goes, until I can't. I go, here I am doing eight. I did my eight, but I could have done 14. How many parts of our life are we that way where we just do what we said? We just do the eight. But I wasn't even tired after eight. I just checked the box. I could have easily done 10, 12, 14. And the way he looked at me like. And I thought, I got out of the gym and I'm like, that's why his traps look like his and that's why mine look like me, right? And that's actually the beginning of when I established my theory of the power of one more. When I think I'm done, I do one more rep. When I think I'm done, I do one more minute on the treadmill. When I think I'm done, I make one more contact. On a day like today, when I think I'm done, I make one more piece of content. And so it's time that you stop doing this thing where you negotiate with yourself. It's dangerous to negotiate once you've made a plan. I've seen Kobe Bryant talk about this. Once you make a plan for how you're going to train, do the plan, don't negotiate. Well, I hurt my shoulder. Well, do the plan. Or more See, successful people don't negotiate. It's almost like I know this because I've had it. I grew up on welfare when I was a little boy for a little while. So I know what a poverty mindset is like and I know what a non one is. I know what a success mindset is. And I know what one isn't because I've had both. I'm certainly not a guru. And I could tell you when I was poor, I was always negotiating the price. I never got what I wanted. When I walked in a store, I'd look at price tags. What's it going to cost? What's it going to cost? What's it going to cost? What's it going to cost? We've all walked in a store like that. What's it going to cost? I didn't go in the store and scan for the thing I wanted. I was obsessed with what the cost was. So many people are obsessed with the cost. What's this going to cost me? Time away from this? What if I get out of balance? What's the expense? What's the cost? What's the pain? The highest level operators in life, they don't negotiate the cost, they negotiate the worth. Will this be worth it? Will it be worth it? And because they look at what it's worth, they don't negotiate with themselves. And because they don't negotiate with themselves, they get the best of the best out of life. If you're going to constantly be in negotiation with the price tag in life, you're always going to get the bargain basement stuff on clearance. You do not want to live a clearance life. I got a deal. I cheated the game. You know, you do that. I bought this thing. I cheated the game. You can't cheat the game. There's no cheat in the game. And when you begin to negotiate in the gym, yeah, I did a good workout. I'll come back and hit it next week or tomorrow or you know what, I ate pretty good. I deserve this. Or you know, you know, this or that. Or I could do it then, or my bad or that. You're negotiating. Once you commit to doing something, it's like signing a contract with yourself. That's the process. And don't start talking to yourself. Don't start looking at it, don't evaluate. Once you start that negotiation, you're toast. I think maybe if you decided to know right now, I'm going to go to a faster pace. I am going to not let everything roll off my back. I am not going to accept myself as I am. I'm going to grow. I am going to set a higher standard. The winners also set a higher standard. See, My standard was 8. His standard was until he couldn't do anymore. Most people's standard is, I'm going to set out to do this and then negotiate it down the Standard I recommend is, I'm going to do this plus one more. The champion set a higher standard and you know it. They also have crazy high expectations of other people. They're unreasonable people that are around them all the time. Like, this person's demanding. Yeah, they are, because they know what you're capable of. I want a leader around me who is so. Their expectations are so high of me. They're even higher than I have of myself. That's someone who believes in you. If you have somebody in your life with crazy high expectations of you, that means they believe in you. Man, I worry when I've had leaders or coaches in my life that don't have high expectations. Like, you don't think I'm capable. Most people like, oh, this is such an easy place to work. My trainer's so cool. You know, we talk about X, Y. I don't want a trainer. That's cool. I want a trainer that pushes me to where I almost don't think I can do something, but he or she knows I can. Pushes me to the next level. If I have a coach, I want that coach to have huge expectations of me. And here's why. The people that live great lives are unreasonable people. They have unreasonable energy. That's who they are. Unreasonable people change the world. Reasonable people work for them, watch them, applaud for them, and stand around wondering how those people got so lucky. They didn't get lucky. Let me tell you what they did. They brought their energy. They found the right energy. Let me tell you what else they did. They were faster. Let me tell you what else they did. They competed. Let me tell you what else they did. They found fuel in the things that you should find fuel in. They did. Let me tell you what else they did. They didn't accept themselves as they were. They wanted to grow. They knew God lived within them and they were capable of more. They were competitors both with other people and themselves. They were not people who negotiated with themselves. They set a higher standard. They had crazy high expectations and they were unreasonable because they're going to get to this end of this life anyway. Remember this? Weird rich, normal poor. And I ain't talking about just money. Rich in experience. Rich in memories, rich in emotions, rich in relationships, rich in spirituality. Rich in faith. Weird rich, normal poor. Please be a weirdo. Please don't conform. This message is sponsored by Green Light. Hey, listen. One of the things I did okay as a dad was I did teach my kids about money. And it was one of the most difficult things to teach them because it's not taught in school at all. They learned all of these things in school that quite frankly they're not going to use in their real life and things they really need like learning about money and budgeting and the value of a dollar. 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When you conform to the negotiation of the price tags of other people, when you conform to their beliefs, you're a coward. Because when you get to the end of your life, you do not regret the prices that you paid to make your dreams come true. You regret the times you negotiate it. You regret the times you settled. You know, one of the greatest quotes of all time is by DL Moody. He said our greatest fear should not be a failure, but of succeeding at something that really doesn't matter at the end of our lives. The regrets that people claim to be their deepest regrets are always acts of omission. Things they didn't try, times they didn't go for it. Wouldn't it be sad to get to the end of your life and never knew what who you were capable of becoming because you accepted your weaknesses as permanent? Because somebody convinced you that it's just okay? Wouldn't it be crazy to learn at the end of your life that I sent you this rejection? I sent you this setback, I sent you this pain. I sent you this to fuel you and you never did. You just let it roll off your back. I was sending you the fuel. I was sending you the juice. By the way, do you want to get to the end of your life and prove the Naysayers, right? Prove them right. That you really never have what it took. That you weren't good enough, that you didn't have the courage, that you were a quitter, that you gave in, that you were average and ordinary. Do you want to prove them right? Or do you want to get to the end of it and you meet God and go, just tell me I did. Well done. And he says, well done. Good and faithful servant. Right? And part of that well done, I believe, is becoming the man or woman he made you to be when he held you in the palm of his hand, when he created you in his image and likeness. Well done is living a life that serves him, serves his children. You do that not by negotiating the price. You don't do that by moving slow. You do that by picking up the pace, by bringing the best energy possible. By competing, by staying close to him, by growing, by going for it, by knowing you were born to do something great with your life. Here's what I know about you. Like I know it. Like I really know it. You were born to do something great with your life. In big ways, maybe. And then some small ways. And guess what? Sometimes the small ways are the ones that ripple through eternity. It's that one person you turned and helped when no one else did. It's that one time someone said that thing to you that really hurt. And rather than take you to your knees, you rose up and bowed your back and said, oh, yeah, let me show you. You underestimate me at your own demise. And then you prove yourself right and you prove them wrong. There's nothing wrong with proving yourself right. There's nothing wrong with proving other people wrong either. Both are fuel, pain and pleasure. Both. But what I know is that you were born to do something awesome. And I know this. At the end of your life, you will not regret the things you tried and failed at. And you won't regret the ones that just didn't work out the right way. But you will regret if you just succeed at stuff that doesn't matter. And even worse, you don't succeed at all. Because you never believed in you. And you never took the fuel that came your way and leveraged it into doing something awesome, which I know you're capable of. People that win are no different than you. They're just fueled different. They move a little different. Their energy is a little bit different. And they've taken those things in their lives and they've turned it into something awesome. It's part of the masterpiece of the tapestry of your life. Is all of these stories is all of these people and your life and your future is enough for negotiation. All right. I hope today helps you. By the way, get on my email list. Go to edmilet. Com. Click the join there thing. Put your email in there so we can stay in contact. God bless you. Max out. This is the Ed Milet Show.