A (4:03)

Perfect answer by the way. Totally true. 99% of my friends are the former description. They make seven figures and they are not wealthy because their burn is so high and it's like a never ending burn. The amount of money that they would need to accumulate and based on how long life expectancies are going now to exceed their burn rate. It's really stressful for so many people that a lot of you follow on social media that a lot of you think are very wealthy people. Scott is 1000% right by the way. Today we're going to skip around like social issues. We're going to talk about young men. We're going to talk about emotions, we're going to talk about money, because he is so skilled at these things. But that's the absolute definition, wealth. And in my own case, you know, Scott, I'll tell you, I've been fortunate. I've had a couple exits, and I've made, you know, a significant amount of money in my life. And as I got into my 50s, I realized it's time to get serious about really being wealthy. Meaning by your definition, what is all this stuff going to cost me the next 30 or 40 years if the music stops? And that, if the music stops, is what most people don't consider. So he's 100% right about that. I did something smart young, and I want to ask you about this. I did not follow my passions young.

A (5:13)

And you talk about this really eloquently. I chose a career that took advantage of some natural proclivities, that I had some giftedness of mine. And when young people ask me all the time, should I follow my dream? Should I follow my passion? I always say, maybe. But I hedge on that because I don't think you can be successful in life unless you become great at something. And I think I'm great at something. You have to have some natural proclivity or talent at least trending in that direction. You talk about that a lot. So what if someone's young, listening to this, or even they're in their middle ages, and they go, look, I want to switch careers. What advice would you give them?

B (5:51)

So we have two types of speakers at nyu, where I teach. The first is really accomplished, impressive people. And the second is billionaires. We've just decided that once your wealth has three commas, you have insight into life, and they give. They always end their talks, or almost always with what I think is some of the worst advice you can give a young person. And it's the following, follow your passion. And the guy telling you to follow your passion made his money or his billions in iron ore smelting. Anyone who tells you to follow their follow your passion is already rich. This is your job. Your job is to find something you're good at, which isn't easy, that you could potentially, after you invest 10,000 hours and endure the bull and demonstrate the grit and perseverance and overcome obstacles that you become great, aim to be in the top 10 or 1% of something and say, where could I do that? And this is the key part. In an industry that has a 90 plus percent employment rate, which by the way, is 90 plus percent of industries. And be careful not to mistake your hobbies for your passion. I'm six two. I have a pretty good arm. A decent, you know, decent vision. Vision or plane of vision, I would have liked, I'd really like to be quarterback of the Jets. That's what I wanted. When I was 16 or 17, I was blessed to go to UCLA where they had real athletes and quickly learned I was never going to be in the 0.1% which you need to be in professional sports. So if you want to be in acting, modeling, fashion, nightlife, restaurants, you want to be a dj, I don't want to crush your dreams. But unless you get bright flashing green lights that you are in fact in the top 0.1%, which you'll get that validation immediately if you're messy. People will tell you that if you don't think to yourself, okay, what could I be? Where could I be in the top 10%, where making being in the top 10% provides a great living. There are 180,000 actors in the SAG AFTRA union, which by the way, is not an easy union to get into. It means you've done real work. It means you're talented. And last year, 83% of those union members didn't qualify for health insurance because they made less than $23,000. So the romance industries attract too much human capital driving down the returns. So, you know, I don't. And also people think, okay, I will. But I will never be, I'm giving up. I'll never be passionate about tax law. Well, guess what? If you have the discipline to get into good undergrad, if you have the ability to get into a great law school, if you understand the intersection of law and economics and know how to handle clients and are good with numbers and you can bring that sort of skill. The best tax lawyers fly private and have a larger selection set of mates than they deserve. And all of those things and the other accoutrements of being great in a high paying industry, camaraderie, relevance, prestige will make you passionate about whatever it is. Passion comes from mastery, it comes from economic security. It comes from prestige, especially in a capitalist society. So your job is to find your talent, not your passion. And trust me on this, as you get older and Ed, you know this, what do we become passionate about? We become passionate about taking care of our parents when they get older. We become passionate about giving our kids some of the opportunities we didn't have. We become passionate about taking Our friends to Aspen and not worrying about money that will. Trust me on this. In a capitalist society, whatever affords you that economic security you will become passionate about. Find your talent.

A (9:32)

I so agree, everybody. It's what I tell my kids. I was golfing one time with Elway, and we're reminiscing on, like, all the cool courses we had played in our life, you know?

B (9:42)

Yeah.

A (9:43)

Hey, man, what's your favorite course? And I thought, is he going to say Augusta or Pebble Beach? And he goes, come on, man. You know this. It's wherever you play the best. That's your favorite.

B (9:51)

Yeah, that's great.

A (9:53)

It applies to what you just said. If you get great at something, you'll find yourself become pretty passionate about it. And even if it's not, if you're passionate about fly fishing, get really wealthy so that you can go fly fish whenever the heck you want. This is absolutely cogent advice, everybody. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now, on with the show. All right, welcome back to Max out, everybody. I'm Ed Mylett. And before we get started, I just want to remind you of something, my friend, and that is this. You were born to do something great with your life. I just had that on my heart today. Before we get going, I just feel like maybe there's an awful lot of you during this time right now that wonder whether that's true. And maybe you need to be reminded of it. Maybe you're not even sure how you're going to do it again. And I'm here to help you with all of that. But I just want to begin by telling you you're special. You were born to do something awesome with your life in big ways and in small ways. And that's the whole purpose of this show, is for me to help you max out your life. And so you're stuck with me this week. If you listen to the show or watch the show for a long time, you know, God, if you're old school. It used to be that every other week I would do a lesson, teach on something like spirituality, fitness, life strategy, influence, relationships, whatever it might be, then the next week, I have a guest on that's an expert that's maxed out a particular area of their life. Well, recently, the last eight months to a year, I've mainly done interviews with experts in different fields. But I had an experience myself yesterday that I've just felt compelled to share with all my brothers and sisters out there that I think might make a difference in your life, might change your life like it changed mine. And so I'm so glad you decided to join me again this week. But I didn't want to start without telling you from my heart. I love you. I believe in you. And greatness is coming your way. I know that. And I do this show not just to inspire you and to motivate you, but, as many of you know, to give you the tactics and the strategies and the tools to make that a reality in your life. And so today, I'm going to give you another one. And I want you to write this down if you can, if you're YouTube or you're not driving your car right now, and that is this. Today's theme is very simple. Diversity is the pathway to richness. Diversity is the pathway to richness. And I mean diversity in two forms. The people in your life and the experiences of your life. And without that diversity, I am so concerned in our culture today that I see us become more and more tribal, less and less diverse, both in our friendships and our relations. We don't talk to each other, we talk at each other. And more and more we hang around people just like us, don't we? And they kind of reinforce our beliefs and our way of living. And we just kind of go in this circle. It feels good. It's like eating cake, you know, it feels really good, but it doesn't grow us. And then the second thing is the lack of diverse experiences that we're giving ourselves access to. And so I looked up diversity, by the way, in the dictionary, and basically, it means variety. We've all heard the saying that variety is the spice of life. And I know during this time with COVID and the global pandemic and high unemployment and political polarization and all the things that are happening, most people say, hey, life ain't so spicy right now, and I want to bring some spice back to your life, and you can do it for free on no budget. That spice, that variety, comes through diversity. So the experience that I had this week that I wanted to share with you, and I can only talk about it for a few minutes because every time I get going, I can't finish sentences. But I dropped my son off at college yesterday and.

A (13:18)

Can'T do it. Sorry. I just. My boy left me yesterday. It hit me much harder than I thought it would. And it's Hitting me even harder again today. And I think one of the reasons is, is that I liked our kind of lack of variety, our lack of diversity. I had him under my roof every single day. But what I keep reminding myself of is how amazing these next four years can be for my son. Why? Because he's about to have the most diverse experience of his lifetime, isn't he? He's already meeting people that he didn't grow up around. People from different backgrounds, different countries, different economic situations, different religions. He's going to be introduced to different ways of thinking. He's going to have decisions and choices to make, good and bad, isn't he, during these years? But any of you that went to college or have sent a child off to college, it's four of the best years of most people's lives. Why, it's the most diverse years of their life. So if that's true for Max, I got to be excited for him, don't I? As emotional as I am for myself. But it's also true for you. It's true for me. There's a direct correlation connection between the amount of diversity in our life variety and how happy we are, how much we're growing, by the way, how wealthy you'll get, too. And so when I dropped Max off, I, you know, I want to tell you first about making decisions. I said, max, you're going to have a lot of decisions you're going to have to make in your life when you're here for the first time. And when I say diversity and variety and chase diversity, right? I don't mean things that you are. You are knowingly aware of could be harmful to you. So when you're offered a drug or a particular drink or some situation or decision you got to make, Max, there's only two things you need to remember. So this is the next thing I'd have you all right now. I said, max, you need to remember who you are as a man, your identity, and number two, what you stand for. And if every decision comes your way, you just remind yourself, who am I and what do I stand for? And is this choice, this decision consistent with that? Then you'll make the right decision. And I know that for a fact, by the way, for you in your life, who are you and what do you stand for? And have you been living that way recently? Because I think you love all people. I think you want to chase experiences. I think you want memories and moments in your life, and you want to be happier. All of that is in this place that most of us avoid as we get older, which is new things, diverse things, different people, different ways of thinking. You're taught in the world right now, aren't you, man? These people are different. They're your enemy. Everybody in the world, both the left political party and the right political party, will tell you, your life's messed up because of these people. It's not your fault, it's their fault. Both parties do it, right? It's interesting. So many people say, you don't know what it's like to be me, but they seem to be an expert on what it's like to be you. Maybe those of you that think you're an expert on what it's like to be somebody else or you've got an opinion about somebody's life, ask yourself if you've walked in their shoes. Ask yourself if you've had their experiences, and if you haven't, why don't you start to get to know people like that? And maybe your opinion could evolve or change or at least you'd have an experience, wouldn't you, that's unique and different than the one you're having with the same three, four, five people you talk to that go to the same three, four, five places. And so you can have diversity right now on no budget. I'm going to talk about those things with you today. And I'm excited for my son that he's going to have this diverse and amazing variety in his life, going for different golf courses, different places he'll go, different things. He's going to have to learn tools and skills that he didn't have to learn when his mom was caring for him. By the way, a lot of you say to me, you know, you talk about your family, but not all the time, not as often as some people might. That's because, just to be candid with you, they deserve their privacy. They want their privacy. And you'd be surprised, when you're a public person, some of the scary things that happen when you expose your family quite too much. But I felt compelled to share that experience with you because it was life changing for him, and it's life changing for me. And the lesson there is, it can be life changing for you as well. So diversity in all forms. Remember I said diversity in people in your life. And I want you to really evaluate that the last 90 days or so, how many diverse conversations you have with.

C (17:09)

People that grew up completely differently than.

A (17:10)

You, different background, different race, different religion. Right? Different experience, your business, how many people that are around you are very different.

C (17:19)

Than you.

A (17:20)

Right? They look different, they talk different, they come from somewhere different. They bring different experiences, perspectives, thoughts, opinions, nuances to the table that are beautiful. See, as a country, we are better together. We're not all the same. People say we're all the same. No, we're not all the same. And that's what makes it so beautiful. We're not all the same, but together we're stronger. Some people ask me if I'm going to run for office. I don't know, but I doubt it. But one of the only reasons I would is I would do it to bring people together. I'm so tired of these political parties, the media, everybody, social media, putting us against each other and the other. Well, we're not the same. We're beautiful. Combined, our combined experience, our combined skills, our combined thoughts, our combined lives, our combined souls are better. Together are better. I'm not saying everybody's good. I don't believe that. I don't believe everybody should be in your circle. But one of the things that's confusing to a lot of people, they say, well, wait a minute. I listen to you. I listen to social media. It says, hey, keep your circle small. Only have people there that support your way of thinking. You're not understanding what that means, so let me clarify it for you. I mean, people that support your dreams, that support you, that support who you are and what you stand for. To go back to my conversation with Max. I don't want anybody in my life who doesn't support who I am and what I stand for. Right? But I want them to express it. I want them to challenge me. I don't want everybody to think politically the same as me. I don't have the same personality as me. If you're a really serious person, wouldn't it be more spicy, more diverse to have some hilarious people around you? If you're a complete right winger, wouldn't it be just more diverse and interesting at lunch, at dinner, with someone who's on the left, or vice versa? Man, have some women friends, Women. Hey. Hey, guys. How about have some conversations with some ladies that you're not just dating? Just get to know their experience, what they're thinking about, what they fear, what they worry, what they want, what they chase, what their anxieties are, what their dreams are, what their insecurities are, and vice versa. That's how we get better. And so your life, right, if you go, I want to be happier. One of the ways is more diversity. And so if you haven't had a lot of that lately, Chase it. There's someone at work that you could reach out to. You don't know, say, I want to get to know you better. Let's have a conversation. Let's have a zoom. If you can get together, have a cup of coffee, depending on where you live, tell me about your life. I see you at the office when we were there. I don't know anything about you. One of the things that drives my friends crazy is that if they get in an Uber with me or a limo, they know I'm not talking to them. I'm talking to the driver, anybody who drives me or anything like that. Because I believe human beings are gifts and only is that revealed to you when you open them up. And so I know I interview, kind of. One of the things I do here is I interview. But I get to know people. I love people. It drives my friends crazy because they know we get in a car if it's an hour. Eddie's talking to the driver the whole time. I want to know where you from, what's your upbringing? Right? Because they're diverse. That's spice. I already know these other three. I could talk to them later. I want to talk to this person. I was driving last week. Example. A guy picked me up. It's from Lebanon. I said, hey, man, what's it like there? Take me through it. And I learned a lot. My life's better because I'm not from Lebanon. I've never been to Lebanon, but I had this picture, what it was like. And he's like, actually, where I grew up, man, Gated community. Middle class, Christians, Jews, Muslims, agnostic. All on my street. And we had street parties and we all got along. Grass said, you're kidding me. That wasn't kind of my image. He goes, well, there's places where it's not like that, but where I lived. Just like where you would live here. I said, you're kidding me. No way. And we had a great conversation. He's got three children. One of this guy's from Lebanon. One of his kids that immigrated here. One of his kids is at Harvard. He's kicking butt, man. He's driving Uber to help support tuition. My life was richer because of that experience. Didn't cost me any money. My life got better, so were yours. If you chase diversity, by the way, so will your business. So I want to talk to you entrepreneurs for a minute. Diversity is the key. I don't believe, by the way, hiring on skin color one way or the other, I don't go well Your skin's darker. I'm hiring you. Or your skin's lighter, I'm hiring you. I don't hire on genitalia or gender either. I hire the person that's the best for the job, like for the presidential race right now, I'm not gonna tell you who I'm voting for, but I.

C (21:23)

Can tell you this.

A (21:24)

Their gender has nothing to do with who I'm voting for, pro or con. Who's the best person for the job? Having said that, one of the mistakes entrepreneurs make and we make in our lives, that I made when I was young is I started to look at my business when I was younger. Everyone around me, my clients, the people that work with me were all just like me. You looked around my business when I was 25, 26 years old. They're all guys, all former athletes or military or police, all kind of the testosterone, masculine crowd. They loved my messages. They loved how I talked, the veins sticking out, getting all fired up, yelling and screaming. And I'd get this reinforcement. So I thought I was doing it right. One of the mistakes you entrepreneurs make is you keep getting reinforced. Your way of thinking, you do it in politics, too, don't you? You watch on TV exactly what you already believe, right? Your phone's programmed. Now that what you've clicked on, they're gonna feed you more of what you like. And in work, we do it too. Why? Why is it that those guys all were like me? You know why? Because we like people that are like us. We just do. It's an unconscious bias. Everybody has it. Black people have it. White people have it. Old people have it.

C (22:32)

Young people have.

A (22:32)

It's an unconscious bias. We like people like us. It's not horrible to have. It's horrible not to be aware of. And so you have unconscious bias in your friendships, in your politics, and in your hiring and training and work. And so I had all these guys. They love what I talked about. It was great. You're great, Ed. Thank you. And we were all fired up all the time about how supposedly great our company was. But guess what? That's a limited segment of the world. So is people just like you. You have a limited slice of life. If everyone around you looks like you. My white friends. How many conversations you had in the last 90 days with a really good friend of yours that's Latin or Chinese or black? My Black friends, last 10 phone calls, you've had last conversations. How many of them were with a white guy or a white girl? And I hate skin color. I hate judging that I'm talking about diversity of experience. Unfortunately, we live in a world where this has become. You better pick a tribe. It's terrible. The truth is most of us are mixed with something drives me nuts that we even have to have this conversation. But the truth is we have become tribal. And the truth is you got to get to know people that are different than you. And so I started to evaluate that. So stay with me on this. And I started to realize I needed to bring more people to the table that could express who I was and what I stood for. Their unique way I can express it my way. I need people's experiences, backgrounds, memories, nuances, personalities, ways of thinking that I don't have. And so let me give you a couple examples of what my business life looks like. I've been named one of the 50th wealthiest men in the world under 50 years old. That's pretty cool. My podcast and my show that you're watching, if it's on YouTube, fastest growing show in the world. Couple different magazines picked me, the fastest growing businessman in the history of social media. That's pretty cool. In just three years, millions of people around the world listen to my content and my audience is unbelievably, what? Diverse. 52% women, 48% men. 48% of my audience is under 35 years old. 52% of my audience is over global and in the United States. I have entrepreneurs and non entrepreneurs. I have Christians, Muslims, Jews, agnostics. I have people that are, you know, trying to win financially in life and people that want to win spiritually in life. It's diverse.

C (24:53)

Why is that?

A (24:54)

Because obviously I'm that same guy that when I was 25, who I've surrounded myself with. So many of you may not know this, but I want you to think about something. I'd love to tell you that all that stuff's grown because I'm so incredible and so wonderful, but that's just not the case. The reason it's grown like it has is because of the diversity and the variety and the spice around me. Not only do I enjoy it, but it's tremendously changed my financial situation. By the way, I do all the social media stuff for free, as you know. But it's grown my brand. Let me give you an example. This social media, YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, wherever you're listening to me, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, all of that enterprise of mine, my public reputation and brand. The CEO and president of that company, the leader of that company is a woman, young woman, a young black Woman and one of my dearest friends whom I love, named Trevi. So, yeah, this entire thing you're consuming for me, turns out it's driven by someone different than me, someone better than me, someone who brings experiences and thoughts. So it's my message, it's my brand. It's what I stand for. I hire for people who understand who I am and what I stand for, but can help me express it differently. Maybe in your case, get to markets differently. And so everything I do, I've. I've trusted my entire public reputation and content with Trevi, and I wouldn't have.

C (26:18)

Anybody else do it.

A (26:19)

I hope she stays forever. I love her so that. Who leads that part of my organization? The person who creates the content that you see on social media. Also a woman. Athena. The person who handles all my personal finances, my bookkeeping, my accounting, my taxes, everything. A woman. Sue. The person who runs my new financial venture that I have. A woman. She's Greek and Latin. Her name's Nicole. She's awesome.

A (26:46)

The person who runs my entire enterprise for the last two decades, all of my companies, handles all my financial, my money, 25 something different corporations, runs my world, is a woman. She's also my sister for two decades. She's my sister all her life, but she's been my CEO for two decades. Erica. Turns out I have a really diverse team. Mike, my videographer, he's been with me forever. He looks like me, but I'm also loyal. So I've got a very diverse team. These women, these people bring to bear all kinds. That's just one example. My financial company has people from many different East Indian, Muslims, Christian, Mormon. We have Chinese folks, Indian folks, black folks, white folks, Latino folks, old people, young people, all winning. Variety is the spice of life. I'm a better businessman. I'm a richer financially and richer emotionally and spiritually because of the diversity in my life. We can learn from everybody. So my challenge to you is take a look at your hiring. If you're running a company, maybe you need to get people together that are there, that are very different. Why don't you encourage people that don't know each other to get on a zoom or to have lunch this week? Just get to know one another, collaborate, connect, get to understand each other's backgrounds and nuances. I would challenge you to do that. I hope that's a breakthrough for you, by the way, on how to lead your company and in your life. Maybe reach out to somebody that's different than you this week, politically, maybe for 20 minutes, listen to something that's not exactly what you already believe, by the way. Well, hey, no, I am. I AM All Trump, 100%. I don't want to hear anything from these liberal wackos or, you know what? Trump is a racist, crazy person. I'm not interested in talking to anybody who supports anything that guy stands for. Cool. So that's how you're going to live your life. You're not going to learn anything from their perspective, they're just evil if they disagree with you. Is that what you're saying? Or are you afraid that your beliefs are so weak that one conversation with them, you may get impacted and change? Which is it? Because if you believe it so strongly, they can't change your mind. Just have a conversation, have the experience and learn. You know what you might find out? There might be something they believe you ought to consider, maybe one little part of it. And you know what the worst thing that would happen is? You go, you know what? I just. I listened to them. I totally disagree with them. I feel stronger about how I feel. Great. That's an experience. But I can guarantee if you had 10, 12, 20, 30 of these, your life would change. How about this? What could you do that's new? For the first time, think about your life. All the things that have been the greatest moments of your life were new in the first time and diverse, weren't they? But maybe the last 90 days, because we've been locked in our houses or there's no financial means, so what could you do? Could there be a new hobby you could pick up new music you listen to? Maybe you're a country music fan, Listen to something else for a while. I'm listening to Sinatra right now. There's no new music out, so I'm going back all the way to Sinatra just to get some variety, just to get some spice in my life. I'm tired of listening to the same songs over and over again, same conversations, Right? The second thing we teach in personal development is, man, you better have habits, rituals and routines. I teach this. People take that to an extreme. That's a foundational thing you should have that gives you the anchor so you can go have variety and diversity and keep your life under control. If everything in your life is routine, if you and your spouse watch the same shows together, go to the same restaurants, order the same food, have the same conversations every single day. That's a relationship that's dying, not growing. Why don't you do something new and innovative? Walk somewhere different, work out together, try a different restaurant. Have a different conversation, watch a different movie. Heck, do something that's just diverse. Don't sleep in your bed tonight. Grab a couple sleeping bags and have a camp out in the living room and a picnic and do something romantic, something diverse. Get creative. It's the spice of life. Your ability to create diverse and variety based experiences will be the juice of your life, your relationships and your business. But you can't go through the motions. You've got to force diversity. Force yourself into variety. New conversations, new experiences, a new place. You hike, I don't know, something new that's diverse. And variety we avoided as adults. And it kills me. You know, you can learn from everybody. Let me share this with you. You'd say, well, everybody, yeah, you may not agree, but you can learn. You can learn. That grows you, you know, Many of you know that. My first job out of college, I worked at McKinley Home for Boys, which basically was an orphanage. My boys were all 8 to 10 years old. My boys grew up in some ways like me, in some ways different. And so it changed my life because I got so much diversity in my life. My boys were wards of the court. So my boys, most of them were either molested by their family, their parents were incarcerated or dead. And so by the way, most of my boys were inner city boys and most of my boys were minority of some type. Okay. They changed my life. You say, well, they must have learned a great deal from you, Ed. I mean, your mentoring and your way of living. They did, and I learned a ton from them. So if I could learn from 8 and 9 year old inner city boys, don't you think you could learn from someone who thinks completely differently than you? Wouldn't that be interesting? By the way? It's one of the great experiences in my life. I still talk about it all the time. Well, what did I learn from those guys? Well, I'll tell you what I learned. I didn't grow up around guys. I grew up middle class. I say lower middle class. My mom and dad keep telling me we were middle class, so I'll default to we were middle class, but I didn't grow up around guys like them. But you know what I learned? I learned to be grateful for the most simple things in my life from them. I remember one day I would walk the boys to school every day and little Marcus every day would start skipping. We always walked in a line and he would start skipping. I'd say, marcus, get back in line, brother. Okay, Eddie. And he would do it every day. So finally one day he Skipped again. I said, marcus, you need to get back in line, man. I'm not going to tell you three times. And he looks at me with this beautiful little face. Marcus was an African American little boy. And he goes, eddie, okay. I said, what are you so damn excited about, man? He goes, no gunshots on this way to school every day. There's no gunshots, Mr. Eddy. And I went, yeah, that is cool, Marcus. That is pretty awesome. And I thought something that simple he was grateful.

C (33:01)

For what?

A (33:01)

A lesson for me. We're always grateful for the biggest things in our lives. The biggest things in our lives. What about the small things that we take for granted every single day? That someone from a different background can teach us is so special. I remember one morning I came in to wake up Jose, and little Jose woke up and I said, jose, let's go, brother. It's time to get up, man. And he gets out of bed and he says, Mr. Eddy gives me this big hug in the morning. He's a little 8 year old at the time. And he goes, I love you. I love you. Thank you. I said, for what? He goes, for getting me up every morning. I said, of course, brother. We got to get to school. And I later found out that his parents never woke him up for school. He'd miss school all the time. He'd sleep until 10 or 11. No one would get him up, no one would make him breakfast, no one would talk to him about school. No one asked him about his report card, no one asked him about his grades. He just wanted somebody to care. And I thought these things that I took for granted with my mom growing up were so simple. See, when you begin to get diverse.

C (34:02)

Experiences, you begin to get insights into.

A (34:05)

Life changing variety in your life. It's also the key to making a comeback. If you're going to change things right now, make a comeback, you need to start to think different and act different and feel different about yourself. And that comes from all of these experiences. You know, I told Max, I said, max, listen, there's going to be choices for you at college, man, that are going to be very difficult. This is not going to be all sunsets and rainbows, right? I said, my freshman year of college, man, I had some decisions to make. I said, I said, let me tell you about my freshman year. I went away to college, which is already scary. So I know you're a little bit scared. I said, I went away. I get there and my girlfriend breaks up with me back home. That one hurt. Then my teammates didn't like Me, I'm super introverted and shy. I was from California. Most of those guys weren't. They thought I was arrogant and cocky because I was quiet, but it wasn't. I was just super introverted. They actually nicknamed me Eddie Myself instead of Eddie Mylett because I was alone so often. And so my girlfriend breaks up with me. My teammates don't like me. Two months after I got there, the coach who recruited me quit and took a scouting job. So now the reason I went there is gone. I said, max. Then the game started, and I was overmatched. I wasn't Good enough. I hit 220 my freshman year. I sucked. I played every game because the guy behind me was even worse than me. And I said, we went 15 and 45 that year. 15 wins, 45 losses, and a bunch of other crap happened that wasn't good that year as well. I said, when it was over, I wanted to quit. And I called my dad, which is his grandfather. We call him Gump. I said, gump came up, and I said, dad, this didn't work out. Look, the guy who recruited me quit. The teammates don't like me. I'm not good enough to play here.

A (35:44)

You know, we're terrible. I just want to come home, and I'll go to another school back home. And my dad said, well, you could do that. You got a decision to make. And guess what my dad said to me? He probably doesn't remember this. He goes, is that consistent with who you are as a man? Is that what you stand for? The same two questions I asked you earlier. I said, what do you mean? He said, is that. Is that who you are? You a quitter? When it gets really difficult, you run. I said, dad, that's not what happened. The coach quit. He goes, oh, so what you stand for? As long as people around you quit and give up, make mistakes, that gives you permission to do it. That's what you're saying. And when it gets really difficult, you just run and you really believe you're not any good. That's why you hit 220 and you can't help the team get any better. It's fine.

C (36:30)

You.

A (36:30)

You can leave. I just want to make sure that that's who you are and what you stand for.

A (36:36)

You got me. And I thought about it really hard, Max. That's not who I am. I don't run when it gets tough. And you know what? Maybe I could outwork these guys this summer and get a little bit better, and maybe I won't hit 220 next year, maybe we could win a few more games. And the fact that the coach quit, that doesn't give me permission to get.

C (36:54)

Weak and quit either.

A (36:56)

My dad was a diverse thinker, and I stayed. And you know what, worked out pretty well next year. I hit like 360, was defensive player of the year. We won some more games. My coach is a friend of mine to this day. So is my pitching coach. Both Quincy and Stan are both friends of mine, and I'm really glad that I made that decision. Max, you're going to be faced with.

C (37:16)

Those decisions as well.

A (37:17)

My. My thinking is maybe some of you listening to this day are being faced.

C (37:20)

With those decisions, aren't you?

A (37:22)

And just remember, is it who you are? Is it consistent with who you are.

C (37:25)

And what you stand for?

A (37:27)

And do you have enough diversity in your life? This is how we're going to make a comeback. Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now, on with the show. Welcome back to the program, everybody. I'm so excited to have this man here today. I've wanted to do this with him.

C (37:49)

For a long time, but it was the universe's timing, I think, that we did it now. He's incredible.

A (37:54)

He's constantly ranked as one of the.

C (37:56)

Top three, four, five leadership experts in the world.

A (37:59)

But when I watch him speak, I.

C (38:00)

Think he's one of the most gifted orators in the world today. He's an author of a whole bunch of different books. We're talking 20 million plus copies sold of his books. He's also a recovering lawyer, which I didn't know until I started to do my research on him.

A (38:14)

And you know what? There's a bunch of people that endorse his work.

C (38:17)

I mean, people like Nobel prize winners Desmond Tutu, Jon Bon Jovi, and me. I endorse his work.

A (38:24)

And so he's got a new book.

C (38:25)

Out called the Everyday Hero Manifesto, which is Incredible. It's about 10 books in one book. So, Robin Sharma, welcome to the show.

D (38:31)

Real blessing. Ed. Nice. Nice to finally meet you.

A (38:34)

Yeah, pleasure.

C (38:35)

It's mine.

A (38:36)

I got to tell you, I told.

C (38:37)

You off camera, I'm just a big fan of the work you do and the way that you do it. So I love the depth to what you talk about, being in your presence. It's obvious to me as well, you've also had the blessing of some heavyweight mentors. I think it's chapter eight, but it's kind of like the advice from heavyweight mentors. Right? Give us a little bit of that juice there.

D (38:56)

Steve Wozniak, the co founder of Apple, was on my stage when I used to do an event called the Titan Summit. Richard Branson was there, Shaquille o', Neal, many of the world's A players and history makers. He was a great mentor to me. I think he has such a great heart.

C (39:13)

Steve.

D (39:13)

Steve.

C (39:14)

Oh, purest heart. Such a beautiful man.

D (39:16)

Showed up alone in the taxi, giving.

A (39:20)

Out guys in the crowd.

C (39:21)

His phone number from the stage.

A (39:22)

He's just such a great guy.

D (39:24)

He was just so humble, you know, and it was like, what was your dream? Oh, I just wanted to do the most amazing coding. I just wanted to do the most amazing coding that other engineers would look at and just go, this guy's incredible. I didn't care about money, and I don't. He was just. He's just a beaut.

A (39:40)

Can I say one thing about it just because I soak it, by the way, I say very good impression of him is that he's one of these.

C (39:45)

Stories that most people don't really know. Steve should be one of the five, six wealthiest men in the world, but what he did to give away early on in Apple and even after Apple became a public company is one of the most amazing stories that most people don't know on the planet is he helps so many other people become wealthy at his own financial expense.

D (40:03)

He did. It moves me to mention the words Cora Greenaway. Cora Greenaway was one of the greatest mentors of my life. She's my grade five history teacher, and there's a picture of her in the book when she was 101.

D (40:19)

And when I was growing up, I marched to a different drummer. I didn't really fit in with the stylish crowd.

D (40:28)

I trusted my own voice. I lived in my head in many ways. I loved to read. I was minimized, laughed at, put down, disbelieved.

D (40:42)

Teacher said, oh, he'll be a drifter, he'll be a vagrant. He won't amount to anything. And one thing I would say to all your many millions of viewers from around the world is, you know, you can listen to the opinions of your critics or you can change the world, but you don't get to do both.

C (40:57)

Wow.

D (40:58)

In the book, there's J.K. rowling. She actually had a pseudonym, Robert Galbraith. She wrote a book after like the Harry Potter success. She wrote a book under the pseudonym Robert Galbraith. She sent it out to people in the publishing industry and they said, sent back letters that said you would do well to join a writing group and to take writing lessons to J.K. rowling. So I was minimized. But this teacher in grade five, Cora Greenaway, she saw something in me that very few people saw in me. And she took it upon herself to save me in many ways and to build me up versus tear me down. And she said, robin, there is something special in you. And I see it. And I think the job of an everyday hero is to shine a light on people's talents and help them become bigger in your presence. I think that's what the world needs right more right now.

C (41:54)

Oh, Robin.

D (41:55)

I think that's what the great leaders do. Their ego is so turned down, and there are such servants that they make people feel bigger in their presence and they leave people better than they found them. And so Cora Greenaway really saved me and inspired me and my life moved into a whole new trajectory after that. I think that's the power. A mentor. A few years ago, I started searching for Cora Greenway. And I didn't know this Ed, but I. I learned that when she was a young woman, she actually was a part of the Dutch resistance. And she would go under enemy lines in Nazi territory and she would save children who were going to Nazi death camps. I mean, just. This was my grade five history teacher.

C (42:37)

Wow.

D (42:38)

And then the third mentor I've had so many, but would be my father. And you talked about your father, and you talked about your sister. And my father is 84, 54 years. He was a family doctor. And he used to say things like this to me when I was growing up. He'd say, robin, when you were born, you cried while the world rejoiced. He said, live your life in such a way that when you die, the world cries while you rejoice.

B (43:05)

Wow.

D (43:06)

He was a Rotarian.

C (43:07)

Your father said this to you?

D (43:08)

My father said it to me. My father was a Rotarian. He would quote Paul Harris, the founder, and he'd say, the one who serves the best prophets the most. And my dad has been just like a terrific philosopher to me. So those would be three of the big heroes in my life. Obviously, my mom. My mom will say, like, why didn't you mention me? But she's magnificent.

C (43:27)

Of course, I make that same mistake when I talk about my dad. By the way, I have to share something with you. I think this little Exchange right here is going to be the reason that your book is so profound.

A (43:36)

So I've had you and I have.

C (43:38)

Been blessed to have access to about every brilliant mind or successful whatever on the planet. They either want our advice or we get theirs, which is a pretty cool thing. I have to be careful that I can get through this sentence too. Yours is your fifth grade teacher. I have these little tiny moments. I'm emotional, but I have these little tiny moments in my life where people that don't think they were Everyday heroes completely changed the complete direction of my life. I had a fourth grade teacher, I was small, my dad was an alcoholic. I had just switched schools. I just thought I was nothing. I had no self esteem and I was struggling in school and it was obvious that the other kids didn't like me. And I had a Mrs. Smith. Susan Smith was my fourth grade teacher. And I remember I used to tell this story even on my show five, six years ago that this, this is Everyday Heroes, guys. These are two of us sitting here. We end up doing a fourth and a fifth grade teacher, both of our dads and basically one other person, right? And so the someone walked in the back of the room and said, Mrs. Smith, we need one of your smartest. Kind of whispered a bit. We go, we need your smartest student because we're going to take the state exam in the other room, right? And I watched Mrs. Smith, she was sitting at her desk, we were doing work. And she goes, that would be little Eddie. I'm getting goosebumps right now. And she points at me and she thought I was the smart one. And I got up and I walked to the back and I went back and took this state test. It was the first person that ever told me I was smart. It was the first person that ever called me out in a room and said that I was special in my life in the fourth grade. And it stood out to me so much to the point that I talked about it on different shows I've been interviewed in. I sought her out about four years ago. She remembered me. She did that on purpose because she knew I was struggling. There was no test that I needed to take. She knew days before she was going to do that, she asked somebody to come to the back of the room. She asked them to say that so that we could all hear it, so that she could say my name, so that I could stand up in front of the class and walk out. What a beautiful woman, what a heroic woman. And that difference, if that doesn't happen that day I'm pretty sure you and I aren't sitting here right now having this conversation. So if you're wondering in small ways whether what you do is heroic.

A (45:50)

What was your 5th grade teacher's name again?

D (45:51)

Cora Greenway.

C (45:52)

Cora Greenway and Susan Smith have changed the course of both of our lives.

D (45:57)

So is she still.

C (45:59)

She's not teaching anymore, but she's still with us. She did that on purpose. Is that not incredible for a little boy in your class?

D (46:06)

You know, there's a model towards the end of the Everyday Hero manifesto called the eight forms of Wealth. And I think what we're sharing really speaks to it. Our society has brainwashed us and heartwashed us into believing that the ultimate metric of success is money, position, what I call ffa, fame, fortune and applause versus the truth, jpf, joy, peace and freedom. And I think, you know, there are eight forms of wealth. Money is only one of them. Now, for all of the business builders who follow you and who follow me, is money important? Absolutely. It gives you freedom, philanthropy, magical times. You can help, it's just, it helps tremendously.

A (46:52)

You're gonna go through a life with it or without it.

C (46:54)

Take it with it.

B (46:54)

No question.

D (46:55)

I'd rather stay in a nice hotel room than in, you know, question fleabag, et cetera. I'd like great food. Versus having said that, there are seven other forms of wealth and we can go through them. And I still haven't answered your question about the tactics for heart set healing. We can talk about the AFRA tool that's in the book.

C (47:11)

Let's do both.

D (47:12)

And you know, my experiences with healers and acupuncture and all that kind of thing. But I think it's really central for us to.

D (47:20)

Appreciate. I believe that there are seven other forms of wealth and one of those is family. I've mentored so many billionaires and they've got the jets and they've got the yachts and they've got massive fortunes and they are heartbroken because they have lost the connection, especially with their children. With children you have a little window of opportunity and once it closes, it's really, really, really hard to open it up again. Another form of wealth that is incredibly important, and I know it's so essential to you, is health. I mean, someone once said to me, health is the crown on the well person's head that only the ill person can see.

D (48:00)

So it's like you have all the money in the world. I've had clients, they have all the money in the world and they've lost Their health in the process. One had an autoimmune disorder. And he showed up at my office and he looked very ill and he'd lost a lot of weight. And I said, what happened to you? And he said, well, as I built my business, I lost my health. Now I've turned the business over to my leadership team and my wife and I travel the world, look for healers to try to get me back to health. Another form of wealth so good is self mastery. I mean, I think the ultimate mission of life is self knowledge. If you go to the temple of Delphi, over the archway, it's know thyself. All the great saints, sages and seers say the ultimate goal of life is to make the journey, to understand your gifts and your talents, to build your character, to build intimacy and fluency with your bravery, creativity and productivity. That's why I love work. You know, it makes me a stronger, better person. So that is a form of wealth. If you have work, you are loving, if you are reading books, if you are listening to Ed Mylett, if you are going to the courses, if you are doing the healing, that is a form of wealth to cherish and celebrate and honor. The last form of wealth is. I used to call it legacy. I don't believe in legacy anymore, like I mentioned, but it's helpfulness, it's usefulness, it's impact. And if you get to help one person in one day, I would invite all your millions of listeners from around the world. If you get to do one thing in a day, or we all can, that upgrade someone's life that puts a smile on their face, that has been a very, very special day. Pau Gasol, the center of the LA Lakers, came to one of my events. We had dinner afterwards. I dropped him off the airport. Everyone was looking at him. He signed every single autograph, took every single photograph. As I left him at the gate, I said, powder, you know, you stopped for everyone. And he said something to me I've never forgotten. And it's so valuable. He said, robin, it takes so little to make someone happy. Great form of wealth.

C (50:02)

Such a great, such a great conversation we're having.

D (50:05)

I thank you.

A (50:06)

I was just sitting here thinking, I'm so blessed to be sitting here talking.

C (50:09)

About this with you.

A (50:10)

I knew it'd be great, but I'm really blessed.

C (50:12)

I'm really grateful that we're doing this. And by the way, he's legendary for that in this area in Los Angeles, or just being kind and. And he was Kobe's favorite guy.

D (50:21)

Oh, I didn't know that.

C (50:22)

Yeah, Kobe's favorite guy and all the guys that played with. I don't know that I should say that.

A (50:26)

But you know what? I do know, and I do know.

C (50:28)

That was Kobe's dude. So we were going to make sure we went back and just so that we've covered it because this has been so good. But you wanted to touch on this health set idea too, a little bit, so I'm gonna let you go on that. I want to hear about it.

D (50:39)

Sure. So that's the trinity of radiant vitality. I talk about epigenetics. I talked about the psych, the pharmacy of mastery that gets set up through morning exercise. Talk about supplementation. I talk about sleep. Sleep is not a luxury, it's a necessity. And the new mechanism that's being discovered where the brain is washed while you sleep. I talk about the importance of massage. I call it the two massage protocol. I don't know if you get two massages every week, but that changed my life.

A (51:07)

I don't.

C (51:08)

Okay.

D (51:09)

Oh, Massage has been an absolute game changer for me.

C (51:12)

Go to the sleepwash thing too. For me, massage, sleepwash. It's in the book, but I don't recall that part of it.

D (51:16)

When you're sleeping, if you get proper amounts of sleep, the brain washes itself. So that's important. I talk about fasting, which is one of my secret weapons, and that throws the body into autophagy, which is like a cleaning mechanism that cleans out the cells. And I also. And in terms of tactics, because we were talking about tactics, I believe very much in meditation. I don't think I've ever done this before, but last night I did a five hour meditation.

A (51:44)

Five hours?

D (51:44)

Yeah. I started at seven and I ended at midnight. So I think that's five hours. And I just opened the room, the door of my hotel room, and I just laid on the bed and I felt the sensations and I just went into this really deep place. But meditation has been incredibly valuable to me, journaling. I've worked with spiritual healers for 21 years because when you put a voice to your shadow side, it sees the light of day. And so to feel a wound, you need to heal a wound. You need to feel a wound. And then there's a tool in the book called the Aphra tool, which has been incredibly powerful to move that hidden, suppressed shame, anger, fear, guilt, disappointment that we all pick up and move it out so that you become much more intimate with your highest and best self.

C (52:36)

Well, you guys need to get The Everyday Hero Manifesto. You just need to get this book. I've read it now I'm gonna read it again. I'm actually picking up things as we're talking now that I didn't even get when I was reading it. So let's look for a few minutes here. There's all these things we can be doing to get to that Everyday Hero. First off, it's just embracing that you are one, I think is fundamental to the whole philosophy of the book. Then there's some things, though, that are obstructions or obstacles to doing it. Right. They can be tools or they can be obstacles. This may seem like a small thing to everybody, but the more I'm even reflecting, last night, I wasn't doing a five hour meditation. I was with my family. But I have to tell you, I was on my phone too much last night. And it's sort of one of these things that I've really improved out in my life. But to the point I'm being transparent that my wife said, put your phone down. Your daughter just said something to you? My daughter actually came in, said something to me. I heard none of it, and walked out of the room. And then there was a few minutes went by and she said, do you realize what I.

A (53:34)

So there's these things, even at where you and I are, where we give.

C (53:37)

Away this, you know, we've got this advice and we've made these breakthroughs. There's parts of us. We can go back to old patterns again. And last night, I fell back into one of those patterns. So there are these obstacles to our piece. There's these obstructions almost. They can be tools, they could be obstructions. You do talk a lot about the foam thing. Yes, you do. And you've talked about it in the past. You talk about it here.

A (53:57)

So what about. What do you know about the most.

C (54:00)

Blissful and successful people as it relates to these. These obstacles, these smartphones or anything else like that?

D (54:06)

Well, I mean, you're so honest to share what you share, and. And I would say the same thing. I make mistakes constantly.

A (54:15)

That's good to know that.

D (54:19)

I think it was.

A (54:20)

Don't you ever do an interview, like, man, I made it sound like I'm a lot better at this than I am.

D (54:24)

I know, I know. I walk away.

D (54:28)

I think it was Nelson Mandela said.

D (54:32)

If. If a saint is a sinner who keeps on trying, I guess I'm okay. I thought that was. That's awesome. That was Nelson Mandela here.

A (54:42)

You know, there's still hope. Gives us hope. Exactly.

D (54:46)

There's still hope. I would say an addiction, a distraction, is the death of your creative production when it comes to productivity. In the Everyday Hair manifesto, there is a revolutionary rule called the five great Hours rule. So you don't need to work for seven hours a day. I do not subscribe to Hustle and Grind. I don't work for more than a few hours a day.

D (55:09)

I work four hours every week. I take four months plus off every single year. How I do it is in the book, including the weekly design system.

D (55:18)

When I work, I'm away from distraction. There's a difference between real work and fake.

C (55:23)

That's right.

D (55:23)

There's a difference between real work and fake work. Let us not confuse busy with productivity. Let us not confuse movement with impact. So I think that's really important. And we can get into the Menlo park and the tight bulb total focus structures. But you talked about Family X. And I believe the greatest gift we can give another human being is the gift of our presence. And if you look at the greatest heroes and the greatest leaders, they had an ability to be there.

D (55:58)

And the very fact you said it means you do practice it. And I can tell everyone watching right now, you have so much presence. And I'm not talking about charisma, which you have. I'm talking about you are here in a world where a lot of people are cyber zombies and.

D (56:14)

Just not present. So I think you can change the world and live a world class life or you can play with your phone all day. You can't do both. And we could get into the science of emotional residue every single time you check a notification, every single time you like something.

C (56:30)

Let's do both of those for a minute. Because by the way, I only have four or five. You know, I think everybody's got four or five significant gifts. Ironically, I consider one of mine my ability to be present.

D (56:40)

Yes.

C (56:41)

And so when I almost violate that treaty with myself, that agreement with myself, it deeply hurts me when I do it, because I don't do it very often. But when I do do it, it's pretty obvious, I think, because the contrast of the two.

D (56:52)

Can I ask you a question? Yeah, please, sure.

D (56:56)

How. How about this? What if you don't? What if you build as part of your family culture, no devices at the dinner table?

C (57:03)

Yes, great point.

D (57:04)

What if you have certain rooms, like the family room, which is really a family room.

C (57:09)

Now that's good. Now that's unique. That one I've not heard. So what I do, what I was so bad that what I Did start doing is I left my phone in the car the first hour before I came home. So I was at least engaged in presence immediately. But this idea that there are rooms where there are no smartphones is one of the most brilliant things anyone's ever said on the show. I mean, seriously, I'm going to do that one thing.

A (57:29)

I am, when I get a great.

C (57:31)

Idea, I'm very coachable and I'll implement it like immediately. I tell you that this evening when.

A (57:36)

I get back, I'm like this space right here.

C (57:37)

There's no phones in here.

D (57:38)

Here's another.

C (57:40)

Sure.

D (57:40)

Another idea. A zero device day once a week.

C (57:43)

Do you do that?

D (57:43)

I do, I do. I do a number of days. And how do you do it? Your schedule?

D (57:50)

Your schedule doesn't lie. People can say this is important, that's important. You look at someone's schedule that shows their truest priorities. So when you schedule it, you make what habit researchers call a pre commitment strategy. And by scheduling what I call a blueprint for a beautiful week, you can actually schedule. Saturday is my. No, is my zero device day. You can do it two days a week. I would also what I do when I mentor, you know.

D (58:19)

CEOs and titans of industries and celebrity billionaires, I encourage them every two months to take a complete week off. I say go ghost, go dark.

A (58:30)

So do I.

D (58:31)

If you look at the greatest Winston Churchill, how did he survive the pressures of World War II? He had checkers and Chartwell. He had a retreat. I think we must leave our usual place and get away from the world. Andrew Wyeth, the great American artist, he had Chadds Ford, a farm in Pennsylvania. And he had Cushing, Maine, a little retreat where he would go to to get away from the noise of the world. If you look at J.D. salinger, one of my favorite books, Catcher in the Rye, after he was 37, checked out from the world, he worked in a little cottage every day in Cornish, New Hampshire. I think we must find time on a daily, if not weekly basis to get away from the noise so we can begin to hear the signal again.

C (59:15)

The signal. I love this. I have to tell you that I think one of the things that surprised me most when I started to coach some of the more successful people myself was the time they take away the ones that had the right amount of bliss. It's where their creativity comes from. It's where they, what you're calling here, the signal. When they're reconnecting with themselves or they're reconnecting with their spiritual lives and I.

A (59:36)

Just bought an island in Maine and people go, why the heck did you buy an island in Maine?

C (59:39)

It wasn't that expensive. But one of the reasons I did.

A (59:41)

It is that's almost like a territory.

C (59:43)

Of disconnection for me.

A (59:45)

And it's one of the reasons I did. There's not great cell reception there, even if I wanted it. And it's an isolated place and it's.

C (59:50)

Where I go to hear the signal. The way that you phra it. This emotional residue thing, I'll just touch on that really quickly because I've not heard this before.

A (59:57)

I feel like we all have these.

C (60:00)

Friends who aren't on social media, or we even have some older friends of ours who aren't even in the text game at all. There is a joy and a bliss that reminds you of a prior time in our culture that they have.

A (60:13)

When I'm around them, a couple of.

C (60:15)

My really, really great friends, there's a joy about them. I'm not suggesting that they shouldn't be on social media or shouldn't have a phone. In fact, I'm suggesting you do both of things. Having said that, there is some emotional deterioration, so to speak, that I agree with you on. That happens when you're too engaged in them. So what were you going to say about that? It sounded like such an interesting point.

D (60:35)

Well, I'd say a few things. I think we're happiest when we're in flow state. And as you know so well, that is a term coined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyev, University of Chicago. And it's based on a neurobiological mechanism called transient hypofrontality. The prefrontal cortex. This is the seat of our reasoning. It's also the seat of the monkey mind. It's the seat of our inner critic. It's when we start to slow down or close off the prefrontal cortex. Transient, temporary prefrontal hypofrontality. Transient hypofrontality. Our prefrontal cortex begins to slow down and our brain waves can go from beta to alpha, maybe even down to theta and delta. And when we get away from our phones, when we practice what I call the three S's, stillness, silence and solitude, our brain drops into flow. We not only feel bliss, there's not only a pharmacy of mastery that makes us feel good, but ed, we begin to inhabit the secret universe known to the saints Sayers, greatest artists of all time. What I'm suggesting to you is Hedy Lamarr, Albert Einstein, Shakespeare J.D. salinger. The great business builders, not all of them, but many of them, had one thing in common. They spent long periods of time alone in quiet, often taking nature walks, working on their biggest problem, on finding the solutions to their biggest problems. So I think you can play with your phone all day or you can change the world. You can't do get to do both. So transient hypofrontality gets you in a flow state. Doesn't happen if you're checking your phone 50 times a day. So those people you talk about, they are. They are present because they're away from the distractions, I'd say. The second thing, emotional residue. It's simply the phenomenon that every time you check your phone, you take some of your focus and you drop it on the notification you just looked at. And that's why at the end of the day, a lot of people can't focus. It's because they have dropped their focus on their phone. They've dropped their focus on the TV in the background. They dropped their focus on chasing these shiny toys and these trivialities. At the end of the quarter, the end of the year, the end of the career, the end of the lifetime amounted to nothing. And then the third thing to think about is cognitive bandwidth. Every morning you wake up with a full well of cognition. So I think it's really important. Where you give your attention to cognitive.

C (63:02)

Bandwidth is almost how I would describe you. You have a tremendous amount of it. I want to ask you about that. We're not having too much more time. I'm just really fascinated with you. So all of our friends sort of told us both, we should get together and do this today. And now that I'm with you, I want to do this again. I'm in the middle of going.

A (63:18)

I want like three or four hours.

C (63:19)

Of you and I just talking because I just think it's great for both of us and everyone gets to listen to it. Right?

D (63:23)

I feel the same way, too. I feel it's real.

A (63:26)

You know, it is real.

C (63:27)

But this cognitive bandwidth idea, I want to understand you a little bit. Let's just talk about you for a second. You're fascinating to me because you were an attorney and don't be humble when you answer this question, please. You have a high iq, you know, Dad's a doctor. There's some good DNA in there, for sure. But you have this amazing ability, Robin, for recall of quotes, of information, of.

A (63:47)

Facts, and a very diverse set of skills. That's what I love about the book, by the way.

C (63:53)

I want to say this about the book again, too.

A (63:55)

I don't want to say Kitchen Sink because that almost makes it seem unorganized.

C (63:58)

That's not what I mean.

A (63:59)

But there's a lot in here that.

C (64:01)

Is not just what you would think about.

A (64:03)

Oh, be a hero.

C (64:04)

There's a ton in here from even all the cognitive stuff, the neuroplasticity stuff, the stuff on how the mind works is so, so good.

A (64:13)

But having said that, what about you? Have you always been this way? Or is it because you are practicing.

C (64:18)

In so many of these strategies that you're sharing that you've increased your capacity for recall, for memorization of even information and actually owning it? This isn't just stuff you're quoting. You own this stuff.

D (64:30)

So I want to hear about you, and I'm fascinated about you.

A (64:35)

When you have your show, I'll come on. I told you that before. But tell us about your no humility. I want to know.

D (64:41)

Well, you know, I would say don't filter it. I would say. Honestly, I would say I'm a very simple person. I come from a town of about 2,000 people on the east coast of Canada.

D (64:56)

I didn't have a silver spoon in my mouth. And I don't think I have any real natural gifts at. I've been at this field for 26 years. I live a very minimalist life. I sense that I have very few friends, I do very few things. I am not a maximalist. I don't chase every shiny toy that comes my way. We get major opportunities every day, 99% of which I say no to because I'm monomaniacally focused on the few things I want to build the rest of my life around. And I think if you build your life around just a few things, I think it was Confucius who said, person who chases two rabbits catches neither. And Peter Drucker said it really well. He said there's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. And so I'm just. If there's one talent I have is I'm really clear on what I want my life to stand for. But I don't think I have any special gifts. But I call them the SOPs of AWC, the standard operating procedures of absolute world class. And I share them in the book. The book is really a love letter to people's highest mastery and promise. And these rituals like the 5am Club and the 202020 formula, the two massage protocol, the second wind workout, the weekly design system, how I visualize how I meditate how I lean into fear each day. All of those things, they really do work. And so over the years, I used to be terrifically scared of public speaking. Like, terrifically scared of public speaking. You're incredible at it, but thank you. But we have neuroplasticity. Our human gift is the gift of growth. The whole idea of heroism is ordinary people thrust into difficult circumstances and using the difficulty to triumph over tragedy. That's what makes us human. That's why I wrote the book. There are so many people saying, well, I can't have more money, I can't have more love, I can't have more health, I can't change the world. And here's the litany of reasons why. Well, if you recite your excuses long enough, you actually hypnotize yourself to believing them to be true.

C (67:11)

It's a fact. And then you reinforce it with the way that the world is revealing itself to you, which is so true.

A (67:17)

That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. Welcome back to the show, everybody. I'm fired up about today because we're going to talk about money and you having more, accumulating more, making more, and why it matters. It's not a topic that's discussed enough in polite society, and it should be. And my guest today is immensely qualified to discuss this topic. I love her work. She as an influencer, you know her as your rich bff, but I know her as Vivian, too. And Vivian is a multifaceted financial expert. She's an entrepreneur, and she used to be a Wall street trader, so she's got a background in doing this. But she takes complicated stuff, financial, and breaks it down simply so that people like you and I can understand it. She's got a crazy good book out called Rich af, the winning money mindset that will change your life. And I cannot wait to jump into all this stuff with her. So, Vivian, welcome to the show.

E (68:19)

Thank you so much for having me.

A (68:21)

Yeah, you are awesome. So. And this topic, like, almost no one talks about, I said it in the intro, so I want to go all over the place. We're gonna go from, like, general concepts to some specific stuff, too. But I decided when we booked you that no pun intended, but I wanted to max out this time for everybody. And the other reason I love your work, too, I should just say, is whether you're a Very young person who's in like your late teens, even early 20s. Her content applies to you. And if you're in your 50s and 60s and nearing retirement, it does as well. So we're going to go all over the place here today, guys. So let me ask you this first. Someone's listening this. They go, I want to be the first millionaire in my family. Let's just start there. I want to be the first millionaire in my family. What would you say to that person who says, I want that badly?

E (69:09)

You need to strip. And then they're like, oh, I didn't realize this was that kind of guest.

B (69:15)

No.

E (69:15)

So strip is an acronym that I've put together that I find to be really helpful in remembering the steps you need to take. So first and foremost, S stands for savings. You gotta have that emergency fund. And I say that as someone who needed mine. I was 25 and I was making a sandwich, cutting a piece of baguette. The bread knife slipped, hit my finger and I saw a piece of my hand fall onto the counter and had to go to the ER and the bill was $16,000. And even after insurance, and I had really good insurance, I still owed a thousand three hundred dollars, which was a lot of money for a young person. And so I always say, make sure you have three to six months of living expenses set aside in a high yield savings account, because that is going to let your emergency fund essentially roughly keep up with inflation so that it's not being eaten away at, but you have your little nest egg in case something happens. Then we move on to T, which stands for total debt. I am an Aries, so I'm very, very impatient and I like to do things fast and I like to do things very efficiently. So when it comes to total debt, I rank all of my debt from highest to lowest interest rate. You make the minimum payment across everything, but then any additional money you have for debt pay down, you're going to put towards the debt with the highest interest rate rate and then you'll pay it down in that order. This essentially just lets you pay the least amount in interest and get your debt slashed in the fastest time frame possible. Next up are retirement. I am a little bit further from retirement than I'm sure Ed might be. But listen, I think we should all be thinking about it because I want to one day be able to kick back my feet and just chill. And I think many of us want that. And some of the easiest things we can do to take advantage of tax benefits is to contribute to Our employer sponsored retirement accounts as well as our individual retirement accounts. So at work that's going to be something like a 401K, a 403B, 457 tsp. It's typically got some weirdo name that doesn't make any sense, but leverage that oftentimes employers will match your contribution. So you do get some free money and then with, with an IRA or a Roth ira, that is your individual retirement account. But contribute to both of these because it is going to give you tax benefits and help you save and invest for the future. And we move into I investing. The mistake that a lot of people make at Step R is that they open these accounts, they put cash in and they're like, alrighty, I'm set, I'm good, I'm invested. No, you are not. When it comes to investing, I always compare it to the grocery store store. Would you ever have $50 in your pocket, go to the grocery store, do a whole lap around and then leave and then go home and open the fridge and be like, why don't I have any food? It's like, well, you didn't, you didn't buy anything. That is how investing is too. You can't just open the account, you can't just put the cash in. You have to buy stuff. And when it comes to buying stuff, I recommend target date retirement funds. Potentially if you're younger, just ETFs that track broader indices. And if you are getting a headache with me saying some of these words, just consider finding a robo advisor. You take a quick quiz about your money goals. What you have, what you earn, how old you are, what type of family environment you want to have, where you want to live, everything about your personality and your money habits. And then they'll spit out a diversified portfolio that you can use. So it takes all the guesswork out of that investing. And then we move into P, which is plan, because you do not get to have a happily ever after or ride off into the sunset without having a plan and backing into how to get there. And what I encourage people to do is actually calculate their FU number. This is a plan where you envision your perfect year. Where do you live? What does your family look like? Are you working? You know, what kind of clothes do you wear, how many times do you go on vacation, do you have pets, what have you? And then you think about what that would cost for one calendar year. And then you take that number and divide it by 0.04 because that 0.04 represents a very conservative 4% investment return. So once you have this bigger number that you'll get after you do that calculation, invested, earning you 4%, you will be able to essentially throw off enough in gains that you can fund your entire lifestyle while you just chill.

A (73:48)

I love Strip, by the way. Everybody, we're gonna dive into some of the things she just said there. I want to say to some of you, some of this stuff already is a little bit more technical than you're used to. We're going to get above at about 30, 000ft in a minute as well. And some of you are very young listening to this. I just want you to know how cogent that advice was. I started planning for retirement, this is no joke, when I was 21 years old, I started thinking about it. I built an emergency fund. First thing I did, three to six months set aside, I started to educate myself about money, which we're going to talk about a little bit later, just knowing basic things. So we'll get above this stuff here in a minute. But before we go, I want to, I want to challenge you on one of the things in Strip, and I just want to hear your response. I'm not going to tell you that I have an opinion one way or the other, but the notion of retirement plans, 401k IRA, that's a very commonly recommended piece of advice. Yet more and more, I know you know this, but more and more there's a contrarian viewpoint about that, which says that you're deferring those taxes probably into a higher tax bracket, that the theory is that you know what you're doing by putting money in. Forget the matching piece for a second, but if there was no matching. But you know I'm putting money into a 401k, I'm deferring the taxes now while I'm earning them because theoretically when I retire, I'll be in a lower tax bracket. But the truth of the matter is a lot of people believe taxes are probably going up, not down. So am I deferring some of that money to more taxes? And then the idea that I'll need less money in retirement than I do when I'm employed, for most people, that's probably not true. So just wondering that one piece of all of it. I've not seen you been asked this on any shows and I wanted to ask you, do you debate that in your own mind as well about the deferral issue where you may be sticking those, those, those eggs aside for a smaller harvest someday? Because taxes could be higher yeah, definitely.

E (75:43)

And I think that's why a lot of folks are now, and I say folks, a lot of corporations are also, also offering things like a Roth 401K. And more and more employees are, are taking advantage because essentially, you know, Ed knows this, but I hope everybody listening can learn this. Traditional investment accounts, typically that are for retirement, allow you to have a tax benefit today and you pay taxes in the future. And to Ed's point, you know, taxes could potentially be much, much higher, and we don't know that. However, the Roth variety is you typically do not get a tax benefit today. You pay taxes, you contribute post tax dollars today. But that money is free and clear, yours in the future. It is why I am such a huge fan of the backdoor Roth ira. For folks who earn more than the typical income limit for contributions. I think the Roth variety makes a lot of sense, if that is your viewpoint. Ultimately, for me, I am encouraging people to just get started. I don't want them to debate traditional versus Roth. I don't want them to like, belabor the decision. Just pick one. At the end of the day, sure. Will one option certainly be better for you than the other? Yes. But not contributing at all or waiting too long is going to be way worse than picking the wrong variety.

E (77:13)

It.