the power of saying no

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Email Sound Booth with Liz Wilcox

Episode Title: The Power of Saying No
Host: Liz Wilcox
Release Date: May 15, 2025
Episode Number: 135

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Introduction

In Episode 135 of The Email Sound Booth, titled "The Power of Saying No," Liz Wilcox delves into the transformative impact that the ability to decline opportunities can have on both personal well-being and business growth. Drawing from nearly a decade of entrepreneurial experience, Liz shares personal anecdotes, strategic decisions, and the internal battles associated with setting boundaries. This episode serves as a compelling guide for online business owners seeking to refine their email marketing efforts by prioritizing quality over quantity.

Learning to Say No

Liz begins by recounting a pivotal conversation with her ex-boyfriend, who emphasized the significance of recognizing that "no is a full sentence" (00:01:10). This revelation resonated deeply with Liz, especially given her history as a people pleaser struggling to decline requests. She reflects, "Over the last eight, nine years, I have learned that in order to say yes to the things that I want, I have to say no to the things that I don't" (00:03:25). This foundational shift from automatic agreement to selective acceptance marks the beginning of her journey towards more intentional business practices.

Benefits of Saying No

Protecting Business Focus

One of the primary advantages Liz highlights is the ability to maintain focus on her core business objectives. By declining certain client work, Liz was able to concentrate on building her membership program. She shares a specific instance where a high-paying client requested her services, but she chose to decline, prioritizing her membership's growth over immediate financial gain:

"I said, 'I'm so sorry, no, I'm not available.' ... Roberto's like, 'You can't buy her time right now.'" (00:07:50).

This decision not only preserved her business’s integrity but also resulted in substantial financial success, with her membership program generating over a million dollars—a stark contrast to the modest $5,000 project she turned down.

Growing Own Platforms

Liz also explains how saying no to external commitments has allowed her to invest more time and resources into her own platforms, such as her podcast and YouTube channel. Previously, she was overwhelmed with guest appearances, participating in up to 12 podcasts a week. By reducing these obligations, she could focus on producing high-quality content for her audience:

"If I was doing everyone else's interviews, there's no way I could do this right." (00:11:00).

This strategic pivot enabled her to build a more robust and engaging presence, ultimately benefiting her business’s growth.

Maintaining Boundaries

Another significant benefit is the preservation of personal and professional boundaries. Liz discusses her experiences with summits and events that demanded excessive promotional efforts. By negotiating or declining these opportunities, she safeguarded her relationship with her email list, ensuring that her communications remained meaningful and non-intrusive:

"It’s my email list. I don't want to be constantly emailing my list with all these summits." (00:13:15).

Challenges and Current Struggles

Despite the successes, Liz candidly addresses ongoing challenges related to maintaining the discipline to say no. She reveals a recent struggle with overcommitment, driven by a scarcity mindset that makes her feel compelled to accept every opportunity:

"I've been saying yes to everything. And it's not even just in-person events." (00:18:40).

This internal conflict has led to increased stress and a temporary lapse in her usual boundary-setting practices. Liz describes the physical and emotional toll it has taken, including feeling overwhelmed and anxious about her capacity to manage her commitments:

"My throat is like closing because it feels stressful." (00:17:10).

Lessons and Insights

Abundance Mindset vs. Scarcity Mindset

A recurring theme in Liz’s narrative is the contrast between an abundance mindset and a scarcity mindset. She emphasizes that adopting an abundance mindset allows for more strategic decision-making, where saying no is seen as an opportunity to invite better-aligned prospects rather than missing out:

"The abundance mindset says, there will be other doors that will open for you, Liz, and they will probably be better." (00:24:50).

In contrast, a scarcity mindset breeds fear of missing out, leading to overcommitment and burnout. Recognizing this distinction is crucial for anyone looking to build a sustainable and fulfilling business.

Aligning with Goals

Liz underscores the importance of aligning every business decision with long-term goals and personal values. By assessing whether opportunities are in harmony with her vision, she ensures that her efforts contribute meaningfully to her desired outcomes:

"This isn't in alignment with what I want to do, where I want to go, what I want my life to look like. I'm going to say no so I can allow for the right opportunity." (00:26:30).

This alignment fosters a more intentional and purpose-driven approach to business, enhancing both satisfaction and success.

Conclusion and Takeaways

In wrapping up the episode, Liz reiterates the profound impact that saying no can have on one’s business and personal life. She highlights that while setting boundaries is challenging, especially when under the pressure of a scarcity mindset, the rewards far outweigh the temporary discomfort:

"There is great, immense power in saying no." (00:28:20).

Liz’s journey serves as a testament to the importance of selective acceptance and the transformative power of prioritizing what truly matters. She encourages listeners to embrace their ability to say no, assuring them that it opens the door to more aligned and meaningful opportunities.

"I believe in your ability to say no so that the real aligned doors can open for you." (00:29:00).

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Key Quotes:

• "No is a full sentence." – Liz Wilcox (00:01:10)
• "In order to say yes to the things that I want, I have to say no to the things that I don't." – Liz Wilcox (00:03:25)
• "You can't buy her time right now." – Roberto (00:07:50)
• "If I was doing everyone else's interviews, there's no way I could do this right." – Liz Wilcox (00:11:00)
• "It’s my email list. I don't want to be constantly emailing my list with all these summits." – Liz Wilcox (00:13:15)
• "I've been saying yes to everything." – Liz Wilcox (00:18:40)
• "My throat is like closing because it feels stressful." – Liz Wilcox (00:17:10)
• "The abundance mindset says, there will be other doors that will open for you, Liz, and they will probably be better." – Liz Wilcox (00:24:50)
• "This isn't in alignment with what I want to do, where I want to go, what I want my life to look like. I'm going to say no so I can allow for the right opportunity." – Liz Wilcox (00:26:30)
• "There is great, immense power in saying no." – Liz Wilcox (00:28:20)
• "I believe in your ability to say no so that the real aligned doors can open for you." – Liz Wilcox (00:29:00)

Final Thoughts

Liz Wilcox’s episode on "The Power of Saying No" offers valuable insights into the art of boundary-setting and the strategic importance of selective acceptance in business. By sharing her personal experiences and the tangible benefits of prioritizing alignment over immediate gains, Liz provides listeners with practical strategies to enhance their email marketing efforts and overall business health. This episode is a must-listen for online entrepreneurs seeking to cultivate a more intentional and prosperous business model.

Transcript

[Liz Wilcox]

Okay, okay, listen up. Episode 135, the Email Sound Booth. The power of saying no. This one is going to be quick, but I hope it will be very impactful for you. I've got a good lesson at the end, or I think I have a good lesson at the end. I always think that, but maybe that's my ego. But maybe you think that too, otherwise you wouldn't be listening. Anyway, over the last eight years in business, really almost nine years in business, I have learned to say no. I was talking with my ex boyfriend about a year ago. We were catching up after a decade of not speaking, and he said, you know, Liz, I finally learned that no is a full sentence. And I was so excited for him. I was so celebrating him because he's the type of guy that always says yes, always wants to help. You know, he's a true community servant, right? And that was something, you know, I, I'm a people pleaser, right? I have an unhealthy attachment to things and I have a hard time saying no. But that's something that I also learned and me and my ex had in common over the decade that we were apart, right? We're still exes. Don't worry, he's just a nice guy. Anyway, the power of saying no, right? Over the last eight, nine years, I have learned that in order to say yes to the things that I want, I have to say no to the things that I don't or the things that aren't a hundred percent aligned. And it's freaking hard, okay? But saying no, I'll just give you a few examples. Saying no has helped me turn down client work so that I could build the membership, right? Even now, people every once in a while would ask me to do client work. And there was actually this. And they're in my membership, and I think they're like eight or nine figure business by now. And they asked me, it was about a year into me not doing client work, and they asked me, hey, we want you to write some emails for me, for us. And I said, I'm so sorry, no, I'm not available. And my, my business coach is friends with them. And I guess they told my business coach, like, she knows we're gonna pay her really well, right? And Roberto's like, you, you can't, you can't buy her time right now. You just can't buy her time. She wants to spend her time growing this membership. And, you know, they, maybe they, let's say, ridiculous. They gave me twenty thousand dollars, which it was Maybe like a five thousand dollar project, but I have made over a million. Oh, that feels so weird to say I've made over a million dollars from this silly nine dollar thing. But if I would have said yes to the client work, who knows what I would have said yes to? That wasn't fully in alignment with the way I wanted to build my business. Also, saying no has helped me grow this podcast and my YouTube channel for the last, you know, or for the first four years of LizWilcox.com I built the business by going on podcasts, going on other people's YouTube ch, giving other people content. But 2025 was the year of Liz's content. If I was still doing that many interviews, I mean, I think, you know, at least once a month, I would have a week where I was doing eight to 12 podcasts. There was not a week where I was doing less than three podcasts for the last, you know, four years. So now that I've been able to say no, I'm not doing interviews right now. And I still do a few for friends, but for the masses, no. And that's helped me grow this podcast. I mean, this is episode 135. If I was doing everyone else's interviews, there's no way I could do this right. Also, the power of saying no allows you to keep your business the way that you want it. For example, I do a lot of summits and stuff. And a lot of the times these summits, they want you to send three solo emails, you know, five social media, blah, blah, blah, y' all. Did you, did you know you can negotiate that? Did you know you can just say no? And some people, when I say no, they don't want me in their event anymore. And that's just a risk I'm willing to take. Some people are like, fine, can you do, you know, two social posts? Cool deal. But the thing is, it's my email list. I don't want to be constantly emailing my list with all these summits. You know, if I like the summit, I will promote it. I don't want a requirement. So that is a firm no for me. Now let me take a sip and change directions here. Hang on. I'm so thirsty. Not leaning into my power of saying no has also. It's also hurting me right now. So normally I didn't even mention this. Saying no to client work also allowed me to go on Survivor. Are you kidding me? If I wouldn't already have the practice of two years of not taking client work. Client work, I Never would have even been able to apply because I would have been like, well, I gotta work. So anyway, being on Survivor made me realize I don't actually have to work in the summer. So 2023, 24, I didn't work in the summer. Now come to 2025. Summer is fast approaching. I'm recording this Monday, May 12th. Usually I take June and July off. I usually also take the last week of May and the first week of August off. So it's like, you know, 10 weeks off, maybe 11. When I say I am not able to do that this summer, I am sad. And it's because I am saying yes to too many things. I have said yes to just about anyone that has asked me to speak. I have been traveling almost every single week since February. This coming weekend will be my first weekend home in five weeks and it will be one of two weekends home for the next six weeks. I have so many opportunities coming at me that it feels like I have to grab all of them. And I'm having a hard time saying no and it feels stressful. Like I'm grab if you're watching me on YouTube. I look terrible, by the way. But whatever. The lighting is not lighting and the eyebrows need to be done. But anyway, my throat is like closing because it feels stressful. So I've got, I've gotten off track and I've, I've lost sight of my boundaries. I've lost sight of Liz. You need summer's off because sure, I'm not working like eight, ten hour days anymore, but I'm working four or five hours. I'm trying to take care of my house. I am a single mom right now. I'm recording this. And my daughter, luckily she has a form to fill out for her summer camp and she's doing that so I can record this, right? Like I have a very full life. But it's because I've been living in this scarcity mindset I've been feeding into. Oh, my gosh. I spent too much money in 2024 because I bought a house. Oh, my gosh. I owe too many taxes because I won money on Survivor. Oh, my gosh. Where's the money going to come from? Where's the money going to come from? Scarcity, scarcity, scarcity. So I've been saying yes, yes, yes, yes, yes to everything. And it's not even just, you know, in person events. There are some things and I want to say yes to them. I really, I want to do these things. They're exciting or they're you know, favors for friends, you know, they're great opportunities that have been given to me and I want to say yes to them, but I'm breaking my own rules to be able to say yes to them. For example, somebody was asking me to come in and do a two hour training for some people and I said yes, definitely. Email Patricia. Patricia tells me they want it to be done in May or June. I told them no. You know, and we went back and forth. You know, I wanted to do it in August or September because that's when I'm coming back from work. But somehow my lowering my boundaries, forgetting that I have power to say no, you know, and this is not the only thing, but I'm doing two, three things in June where I should have just said no. I'm sorry, you have to wait until August or September. Right? So, you know, lest you think I'm perfect, lest you think I'm the queen of boundaries, as I've. I've heard that from friends before. Like, oh, Liz has no problem saying no. Sometimes I do, but really, it's only when I'm living in that scarcity mindset of that scarcity mindset says, now, now, now, you're never going to get asked again. Right? But the abundance mindset says, you know, there are the, you know, there will be other doors that will open for you, Liz, and they will probably be better, right? Like turning down client work thousands of dollars at a time to build this nine dollar a month thing. Get out of here. But that was, that was the real deal. You know, that's the power of saying no. I've made way more money with my membership than I could have made with clients and I work way less. So anyway, just wanted to kind of slow down on the podcast and remind you and myself, you know, there is great, immense power in saying no. But, but only you can only do it when you're living in that abundant mindset when, you know, nope, this isn't in alignment with what I want to do, where I want to go, what I want my life to look like. I'm going to say no so I can allow for the right opportunity. All right, Woe is me. I have to work in June. I'll get over it. As always, I'm Liz Wilcox. You are awesome. I believe in your ability to say no so that the real aligned doors can open for you. I'll see you on the next episode.