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The Everyday Millionaire and Mindset Matters Podcast
Mindset Matters - Episode #165 - Thrive in 2025: Clarity Equals Velocity
00:31:18
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- [00:00]
A
Foreign. Welcome to this episode of the Everyday Millionaire Mindset Matters podcast, where I'm joined by my wife, Olympic mental performance coach Stephanie Hanlon. Francie. In these episodes, Stephanie and I have a conversation about the different aspects of what we refer to as Mindset Matters because we believe that for those who are awake, we are living in and through the most impactful time in history. Your view of the world is the filling filter for how you will experience the evolution and changing dynamics of it. Our intention is to provide you with ideas, nutritious food for thought, and some tools that you can use to help you in being your greatest self and living your best life. Listen in. Enjoy. Stephanie.
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B
Hi, hon.
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A
We're here.
- [00:54]
B
We are. We're both here. And I'm a little jet lag, so if I'm a little slow on answering or not as quick and funny as I usually am.
- [01:03]
A
Well, you're as quick, funny and beautiful as always. So the title of this kind of off the top of my head, we'll see what the final is, is it's Time to thrive in 2025. Time to thrive in 25. We kind of came up with that last night at the rain meeting. We're recording this prior to, of course, but anyways, you're just back from France, so before we get about striving to or arriving or what the hell's the title? I've forgotten it already.
- [01:30]
B
Arriving and thriving and 20.
- [01:32]
A
Driving. Driving in 2025. You just got back from France. Good trip. You owned the podium almost. You had a gold and a bronze. Your teams us took gold. And was it Great Britain that took bronze? What? Was that correct? Yeah, look at me. Wow.
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B
It's like you're paying attention.
- [01:51]
A
Memory like a steel trap.
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B
Steel sieve.
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A
My. My memory is so good. It's just really short. Okay, so let's carry on. So we're going to thrive in 25, but ultimately, you know, the kind of thought processes is how do we bring some value to our listeners so that they can actually carry this on no matter what year it is? Now, you did a presentation for the rain community, which you often do at the end of the year. You've done that many times over the years, which is about completion. How do we complete a year as we go into a new year so that we're not taking a bunch of, I don't know, I'll call it baggage, but it really is, you know, are you operating on top of a bunch of incompletions that you're going to drag into 25 with you or into the new year with you, or are you going to step back a little bit, look at what is incomplete but that you might want to let go? That would be one context for it. Another is, are you going to honor the progress you did make in 2024? In this case, a little bit of the gap and the gain where, hey, let's focus on what we did accomplish less about what we didn't accomplish, and then make some decisions about how we want to show up in 2025. You and I had the mantra and a little bit of a theme for 24, which I think I want to carry forward, which is clarity equals velocity. We actually did some coaching programs around that all to say this, I think clarity for velocity has got to be kind of. We got to own that, like it. We got to live that and always be operating from that place. So a little bit of a opening context. What's your thoughts?
- [03:39]
B
Well, clarity equals velocity. Yeah. So the problem with that is determining and fighting for clarity sometimes can create a whole lot of bullshit and stuff that coming up in your life that maybe you don't want to look at. The reason we don't have clarity a lot of times for myself is that there's things that I haven't been able to look at or I'm procrastinating. And then all of a sudden, the minute you gain some clarity and things start speeding up, it can get a little overwhelming. So the reason I love these completion exercises is it really forces me and you and our conversation to. To bring up things that maybe haven't been fully completed. And I don't mean, you know, done done or finished or fully closed. I mean, we can only be as complete as we can be in the moment. Maybe sometimes we don't have enough information or we're waiting on someone to get back to us around something, which is fine. Those things don't have to be completed in the moment. But there's some things we intentionally can leave undone or incomplete which can become the precursor to procrastination. And to me, procrastination is the foundation. And I'm not a psychologist, but I'm going to say it. It can be the foundation of depression. So to me, it's a very important conversation. Yes, we. We've done it every year since we've been involved at this level with the rain community. We do completion exercise at the end of every season or every year. I do a completion exercise at the end of every competition. And sometimes depending at a competition, depending on the result in the Segments. So exam. For example, there's what's called the rhythm dance segment and then a free dance. And if somebody had a really, really great segment in the rhythm dance and they still have to carry that energy and, and, and still win the free dance, they have to, have to, have to find a way to complete so they don't carry the expectation into the free dance, for example. So I use it in many different areas, but the importance of it can't be understated when it comes to businesses, to relationships in communication, and how often we're operating on top of incompletions when it comes to our most intimate relationships.
- [05:43]
A
So I want to just, you know, expand on something that you said which was, you know, procrastination is often one of the things that we see leading to depression. You know, what's interesting about that, on the other side of that is the comment that, you know, many psychologists, many experts use, you know, say, to somebody who's feeling depressed, the cure for depression is, is action. The cure for depression is getting something done, doing something, getting moving. And that is ultimately the cure for depression. So that's an interesting take on it. That's not what we're here to talk about. But, you know, I always kind of like the quote, I'm not quoting it right. I don't even know who shared it with me, which is get it done now, procrastinate later.
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B
That's good. I like that.
- [06:28]
A
Okay, so that's kind of the thought process around that. So let's talk a little bit about, you know, clarity equals velocity. I want to go back to that just in a mo for a moment, which is to say, you know, as we had that theme we did, there's a lot of gains within that kind of concept. And as we focused on having clarity, keeping on moving forward, that does cause and create some chaos because others are at the effect of us. So as business owners, as leaders of the team, our clarity and our drive to have clarity creates chaos because everybody is also into their own way of operating and their own operating system. And it's way easier to operate on top of an incompletion or something that isn't quite clear because then it becomes an excuse to not get stuff done, not to do things. It just become, well, I didn't know and oh, I thought they were going to do it. And so they don't ask questions. Of course they can live in the ambiguity of any kind of scenario that they're operating on, top of, which is, number one, not clear and, or number Two is an incompletion that they're just choosing to ignore because it's either chaotic or it's too much work or they don't want to do it today, they'd rather procrastinate. So all of that to say that we also experienced that as well, that whole thing. Yeah.
- [07:42]
B
But don't step over the fact that there are many, many people, and this is so interesting from an entrepreneur standpoint, is that they just, they're really great at startups, they're really great at the beginning, they're idea people. But what happens is that when you don't have an implementation, implementation plan or a team that can help you, you're just continually starting something and then the list of incompletions that comes from that is overwhelming. And that's why we really see people that are excited and that are really driven with ideas and new ideas all the time. All the time. The problem with that is that the addiction to the newness wears off when it comes to the TikTok or the, the day to day grind of actually getting something done. And what I've really gotten over the years is results live on the other side of the incompletion. So whether it's a conversation or something that got missed in a, in a process or something, or somebody got angry or somebody was misunderstood, if we don't have those completion conversations and digging in to figure out what we're operating on top of, that particular situation can block the flow of results. And that's what I really want to also bring to your attention also is that results live on the other side of clarity. So clarity equals velocity. Yes. But if you're looking for results, let's say membership registration, subscriptions, something you're trying to sell somebody and you're not clear, then basically a confused mind always says no. So back this up and go, okay, if I'm not clear and I'm not presenting what it is that I'm wanting you to understand about what I'm wanting you to buy into, or I have something that I think you really, really need, if I'm not clear, then I can't present it that way. And until I'm clear, until I've got that clarity, it's really difficult to have the speed of velocity and allow people then to buy into what it is that I'm doing. So that piece of it about results and about getting what you need, I think is part of thriving in 25, because I don't know about you, but 24 was, it was a It was hard for me on a lot of levels.
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A
24. Interesting. So we did that exercise, or we asked the question last night is that if you had to write a headline for your 2024, what would it say? And I was thinking about that. I don't know if I have a headline. You know, it's been a roller coaster. How's that?
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B
It's been a roller coaster. And, you know, maybe for me it would be, you know, I was going to say shit happens, but shift happens, you know.
- [10:20]
A
Hey, well, listen, you know, let's talk a little bit about one of the things that you mentioned in your talk last night, which I thought was really good point is that we talk about incompletions, but if you have an incompletion and it's not ready to complete, that's fine. That's a decision. So in other words, park it. I'm not ready to complete. For whatever reason, I'm going to bring it forward with me into the new year. But ultimately it's a decision right now not to complete. There's other stuff that, you know, what are you not willing or what are you hanging on to where you just gotta cut it loose, be done, let it go. And sometimes we hang onto those things for a long time. I use the example is that how often do we look at our closets that are maybe blowing up? Not that our closet is.
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B
Well, that'd be my closet.
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A
That is your closet. And it's like. And this isn't you, because your weight has pretty much always been managed. But, you know, ultimately you think about, oh, I'll, you know, I'll get in. I'll. One day I'll be able to get back into those jeans and, or, you know, whatever the scenario is. And they've been sitting on the hanger. They've actually got a hanger crease in them. And, you know, four years later they still don't fit. Gas it. So I'm more of a purger than you are, there's no doubt about that. So my point is that, you know, how do we complete? And those are some of the things that we carry that energy into the new year. And it's an energy leak we talk about that often, is where are your energy leaks? You know, what relationships, for example, do you carry on because you feel obligated or you're not willing to have that kind of courageous or uncomfortable conversation to either recontextualize a relationship or actually to just let it go, to let it drift away and maybe it doesn't have to be a drip. You maybe have to be more intentional about it and go, no, I'm done. But if you're showing up because you feel obligated and it doesn't light you up, then ultimately those are the energy leaks that you don't want to take into 2025. Let's face it. You know, one of the things that I struggle with is that, you know, as we go through the transition of where we are in our own life and say, okay, well, what do we want to do going forward? Because neither of us are interested in, you know, sitting on a beach somewhere for an extended period of time or golfing every day or pickleball or whatever that is. We were in that phase of our life where we can make those kinds of decisions and want to make those kinds of decisions. But is what is we. What are we creating as we go forward? Now? The thing that I want to kind of consider in all of that is, you know, how are we showing up? What is it that we want to do, and what are we going to let go of so that as we go into the new year, we aren't carrying all of this additional weight, this additional baggage. The quote I use often because it's so appropriate, which is, it's not the weight we carry that breaks us down, it's the way we carry. The weight in this case, I'm suggesting is, what weight can we let go of? What can we complete? Which is a weight that we're carrying is those energy leaks. So I don't know where exactly I was going with that, but. What's your thoughts?
- [13:26]
B
No, a hundred percent. I think what happens when we have incompletions, we have to look at compartmentalizing them. If we look at all of our incompletions all at the same time, I think it can be overwhelming for people, especially if you've tried a bunch of things, a bunch of startups, a new idea, something coming down the pipe, a move, maybe a relationship. Maybe you're pregnant, maybe you're getting married, maybe you're getting divorced. All the things that are going on in life, if it all comes down into one big bundle, it can be extremely overwhelming. And that's where I think procrastination and hesitation and just not taking action can really live, which can lead to that. That really scary, you know, place in life where. Where things get really dark. So I usually go into seven areas of life. You know, what do I need to complete today, in what area that's up for me, and, you know, to your Point. My closet has been up for me for a while. And as I've been filtering it through and looking at things that don't serve me anymore, don't fit anymore, I found different places in our town in and around areas that I can donate things that, you know, I don't have to give it to a value Village or a reseller or something I can actually donate. Then I look at the clothes or I look at my fitness and I go, okay, you know, I've been walking more. I've been doing weights again. I've been doing the little vibration board, which is hilarious. And I can feel the difference in my. It's like it flushes your. I don't know, it's. It's really cool how it works. I have to look into it. But putting that back on my list closes an incompletion. Because where we can open up our incompletions is in our shoulds. And when we're shooting all over ourselves and we should work out and we should do this and we should organize our sock drawer and we should do that. It's a massive incompletion which creates that gap of just where it affects us in our self worth and our self belief and our motivation and our inspiration. So I really look at the seven areas of life and then when I'm working with a client and they're in completions, I mean, I had one glorious experience with a client over the years where we probably spent the first two years working together. And I had only met her once at a rain meeting, and the rest we had done. I think I was still living. We were still living in Edmonton over the phone, and back then it was on Skype and her garage wasn't in completion for two years. But every time we had a meeting, one or two things would be reallocated, would be thrown out, three things would be moved. And honestly, that moved her in a way that she was able to open a business. She ended up getting pregnant with her fourth child. Like, the energy that got opened up just by completing the incompletions was magical. I'm getting goosebumps. Like, she was so powerful when she was doing her incompletions. Because that sense of accomplishment that we get is truly part of significance. And one of our highest values as, you know, as human beings is significance.
- [16:09]
A
Okay, so let's. Yes, so let's. There's a lot I want to kind of unpack and talk about even in that conversation. But let's go back seven areas of life for new listeners. We're going to put a link in the description so that you can actually download a document that I wrote a long time ago now of the seven areas of life. And it was based on the work that we had done with Dr. John Demartini over the years. But seven areas of life, you know, financial, vocational, familial, social, physical, mental, spiritual. So those are the seven areas of life. So the context of the seven areas of life and understanding those seven areas of life is a constant reminder to yourself. I mean, as many years as we've done that work, I know that myself, when I'm feeling overwhelmed, when I'm feeling bitchy and pissed off, like I haven't got the results I'm looking for, I have to break it down and say, oh, okay, it's not my whole life. It's just one specific area of my life. And whether that be physical, mental, financial, you know, whatever that might be. And then I have, I can look at the rest of it and I go, oh, I'm letting this kind of affect the whole, you know, the whole part of my, my whole life, as opposed to going, no, this is just this one segment of it. The rest of my life is pretty awesome. And so it's just a way of contextualizing and not carrying that heavy weight. Like all of life is brutal because of this one thing that is happening and that it becomes these energy leaks. So it's just a way to contextualize it. That was the point there. So this week we did a Breakfast Club and within the Breakfast Club, we did a. And provided a pretty extensive worksheet in terms of, you know, what did you accomplish in 2024? What were some of the things that you did and you can be proud of? What are you most proud of? It was a whole set of questions. We'll put that PDF as well in the description in the link either on our website on the everydaymillionaire ca or if you're watching this on YouTube, we'll put it in the description on YouTube, but it'll be somewhere for you to find within it. We'll maybe post it when we do our social media push out. The point is, this is what was interesting that everybody on the call struggled to say, what was your big wins in 2024? What were, you know, some moments that you're really proud of? And it's, it is so interesting when you're working with entrepreneurs and A type personalities. How many. And I'll speak for myself as well. How many of us or how often I have a Win, I get shit done, I move on. It's like I don't really even necessarily celebrate it. And so one of the wins for me this year, one of many. And I had many wins this year in spite of the fact that it was like a tough year. I could look at all of the shit that was hitting the fan and all the fires that we were fighting and I was fighting. But ultimately I did a lot of really great stuff in 2024, stuff that I can be proud of in just about all areas of my life. One of the things that I was, that has recently shown up for me is I did the shift men's coaching program and we completed that earlier in 2024. But what was really cool is the guys that were part of the program. Although the program itself, the formal component of the program was, was complete, you know, the men went on to, they stay connected. You know, I'm going to actually get in on a call with them this month before the end of the year. But I was really, I was really happy to hear that. I was really proud of those guys. And they carried on those relationship and a space for them to show up with other like minded men. That's the magic of it. And I was really happy to hear that. That was a big win for me because I was just, it was part of what I wanted to create and it's how it showed up. I didn't force the river on that. They all hit it off. They all realized that being in a group of like minded men is kind of nice to do every so often, right?
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B
Well, it is. And it's something that we don't do enough, I think or I, I think people take for granted. You know, some people automatically have that kind of community, whether it's maybe in their church or in their community or in sports. You think of how many families get together and you know, over a hockey game and sit around and have hot chocolate and Bailey's or whatever, go to Vegas on a hockey tournament. It gives you that community where you have a like minded scenario and people that you can relate to. The part that's I find interesting is when those types of events or things come to an end or maybe you find that you're bumping into. You know, I had a conversation with a client the other day about them changing churches because they found that the conversations just weren't aligning anymore with what their belief systems were. So even in that regard is how do you make the decision to walk away or choose a different environment or you know, and still, you know, do it with grace. And that's where the completion exercises, I find are really powerful. And the Breakfast Club, I was able to. To join in from France because it was late afternoon there and early morning in. In Canada. So I got to do the exercise with everybody. And it was so powerful because to your point, the struggle was finding something positive or something that I was proud of and something that was working and went well. And you could hear like it was crickets, you know, on the. On the zoom call initially, but as soon as people started writing and looking and digging underneath and finding the things that went well and looking at the gains instead of the gaps, you could really feel the momentum and the. And the fire that was coming out of the conversations. And people were on that call, and at the end of it, they were saying, you know what? I really. It really was, you know, look at it. It was a really good year. And what I'm going to bring forward is. And whatever that is for you. And I really appreciated that conversation and the fact that we're going to share that as a document. I want to step back to the seven areas of life document. You're threatening to turn that into, like, an audiobook, I heard.
- [22:09]
A
No, I'm not threatening. It's not a threat. It's not a threat. We're turning it into an audio book and you're reading it.
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B
I know. I'm so excited and scared. You know how just people just don't like their own voice.
- [22:24]
A
You. You got a great voice, so it's awesome. And if you're listening to this on YouTube, put it in the chat. Do you like Stephanie's voice? I love Stephanie's voice. And again, I'm a little biased. Except for when you're whining and complaining about me.
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B
Yeah, like, I do a lot.
- [22:37]
A
Yeah, you do that a lot. So, you know, when we start about setting our compass for 2025, you know, some of the things that we want to do is say, okay, what, first off, what did we accomplish in 2024? I'm going to read some of the questions that you can take on if you decide to download this particular document. So what new or existing relationships did you develop in 2024? Where did you have the most fun? Now, it's interesting about that. People think about fun. I look at it differently because neither of us are big hobbyists. We've done lots of things in our life over the years and skiing and, you know, and, you know, for me, you know, horseback and training horses and dogs and doing all sorts of that kind of stuff. But we have so much fun doing what we do in general in our businesses that for me, I think that really landed for me, you know, what are you grateful for? And lots of things to be grateful for. I'm always grateful for you. And by the way. And who do I need to thank? You. I thank you all the time, but there's lots of people to thank. If you were to write a newspaper headline that summarize your 2024, what would it say? We went over that one, and then we start to look into 2025. What do you want to achieve in 2025? Challenges you anticipate in the year ahead that you want to lean into, and what do you need to learn in the year ahead? I think that's really cool. And what do I want to grow or learn about myself? So there's a bunch of questions that kind of make you sit back and think. It's interesting. I just had a meeting with a guy today, Stephanie, that I talked a little bit about, which we're in a new initiative that I want to go into 2025 to maybe consider. Anyways, he's 50, I think he said 58 years old. He's been journaling pen to paper every day since he's been 20. And it's part of his practice. Very uber successful guy, owns 11 businesses. Like, he's done some really cool stuff. Anyways, I'm looking forward to doing some potential work with him. So the point is this 2025, the only thing that I'm gonna kind of. What's the word? Give context to or make some suggestions around anything. It always comes back to who do I need to become to achieve whatever I set out to do? That's ultimately always it. You know, you and I talk about it with this clients all the time. We can tell you how, but it doesn't matter how. If you don't become the person you need to become to do the how, that's the big kind of takeaway for 2025. Think about who do you need to become to achieve whatever it is that you're looking to achieve? So.
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B
Well, compartmentalize that into the Dennis Wheatley quote is, you know, who do you have to become to achieve the goals?
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A
Yeah.
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B
You know, who want to be an Olympic champion? Who do you have to become? You can't do the same thing that you've always done or do the same things that people maybe even have achieved a national championship, for example, or something that's quite. I mean, if you Want to, you know, graduate your. Your undergrad? Who do you have to become to. To be accepted in a master's or a PhD program? From a learning standpoint, from a self development standpoint, from a fitness standpoint, the higher the goal, and I say this all the time, the higher the goal, the bigger the pushback. So what that is, it's like that, you know, becoming a diamond, you know, you had to put a lot of pressure on a chunk of coal to become a diamond. Who does that? Who do you have to become? And I love that because it makes it. When you think about making it a part of your journey, part of your journey to become, you know, the. The highest and the best version of yourself, it's a journey. It doesn't mean you're going to have to do it everything overnight. And working backwards from, let's say, the end of 2025, if we can project. And I love this, you know, it's the power of understanding about, you know, how you get your goal basically, and create your life is to work backwards from something that you want or something that you want to be or become. And so next 2025, when we do this call on our podcast or we do the Rain meeting completion exercise, what's your headline? Working backwards from 2025.
- [27:00]
A
Yeah. And then my journey in 2024 was working backwards from when I'm 70, so whatever year that happens to be, because I had a vision and I happened to use Kennedy as my inspiration as a. He was 68 at the time. And I went, okay, so that's a cool. Like, I like those qualities and can I step into that? I. And I think I've done a pretty good job overall. But I, you know, it's like one step forward, two steps back, three steps forward, a step back. It's like always having to put in the correction. But it's a different thought process of not what I'm doing, although that's part of it. It's who I'm being as I'm doing anything. And so that's the component of it that for me, keeps me grounded and keeps me moving forward one small step at a time.
- [27:50]
B
Let's call that the personal development cha cha. It's like a dance. One step forward, two steps back. One step forward, two step back. It's a personal development Cha Cha. It's just a dance.
- [27:59]
A
Yeah. You are just genius. That's a good one. Okay, so as we start to wind down, the thought process about 2024 is really get clear on what do you want to let go of in terms of incompletions. Are you going to let it go? What are you going to take forward into 2025? But what do you want 2025 to be about? We have friends of ours that, you know, as long as we've known them, I think they've always themed the year. So what is their theme for the. What is your theme for the year? I think for us, you know, clarity equals velocity is an underlying. It has become, for me, foundational as a theme. I think I really like that thought process because it works for us. And even when we're putting it out there for people, it lands for them going, you know, that's. Yeah. I gotta insist on clarity. The challenge with clarity is it does take some additional effort to do that. So thrive in 2025. I think it's pretty good theme. Thriving in 25. I don't know. We have to work on that one a little bit. Do you have any ideas for theme for us this year?
- [29:02]
B
I like it. I like it. The things that are opening up to us, like different opportunities for speaking engagements and gigs and opportunities to. To continue to. To. For me to live my calling around coaching and supporting people and athletes and traveling. And it's still a big deal for me, I think from a theme standpoint, you know, I like it a lot. One thing I do understand and what kind of makes me pause for a second is that most people are striving, you know, striving to arrive, you know, and that striving piece can be extremely heavy. And I think if anything, a completion conversation with yourself or your journal about what is going well, what is working, what isn't working, what do you want to bring forward? What are you really so done with? Yeah, all those kinds of conversations that I have constantly going on in my head. Create the clarity. That's what creates clarity. And what that clarity does is then create the opportunity for velocity. Now I can control what's happening, what's coming at me. I feel like a little bit more steady when I can do these completion exercises. So instead of striving to arrive, to thrive in 25, what if we create the opportunities for ourselves to not have to strive, to not have to struggle, but to actually come from a place of feeling grounded and complete and optimistic for what's coming.
- [30:29]
A
I love it. I think that's it. I think that's. I think we can be complete. I think we can be complete with this episode.
- [30:37]
B
That was awesome. That was fun. Thanks, hon.
- [30:41]
A
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for listening. If you found value in the podcast, please take the time to rate and review and share with others. Share with your friends as it is my goal to always improve and to provide the highest value for you, the listener. If you have any comments, suggestions or questions you'd like answered, please email me at ceoaincanada.com that's C E-O-R E I N canada.com I look forward to hearing from you. And until next time, Patrick goes.