← The Everyday Millionaire and Mindset Matters Podcast
The Everyday Millionaire and Mindset Matters Podcast
Mindset Matters - Episode #183 - Why You Feel Stuck: The Limiting Beliefs You Didn’t Know You Had
00:38:10
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- [00:00]
A
Foreign. Welcome to this episode of the Everyday Millionaire Mindset Matters podcast where I'm joined by my wife, Olympic mental performance coach Stephanie Hanlon. Francie. In these episodes, Stephanie and I have a conversation about the different aspects of what we refer to as Mindset Matters because we believe that for those who are awake, we are living in and through the most impactful time in history. Your view of the world is the filter for how you will experience the evolution and changing dynamics of it. Our intention is to provide you with ideas, nutritious food for thought, and some tools that you can use to help you in being your greatest self and living your best life. Listen in. Enjoy, Stephanie. Here we are. Mindset matters episode I think 183.
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B
Wow.
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A
Hey, honestly, 183. That means that in June 1st, I think it is around Juneish. We'll have done four years every week for four years coming up.
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B
Good for us. We should do a big celebration for like number 200. Let's do something super fun.
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A
We'll look forward to 200. Anyways, here we go. We got a kickoff. I just got back from Edmonton where I worked with Alfonso Cuadra, Wealth Genius. We hosted a three day event. I co hosted, he mostly hosted. I did my presentations and hung out with some amazing people. It was a great weekend. Really good. Alfonso is an all star. Amazing story. You talk about mindset. There's a man who has been through a lot, seen a lot, and has just come out on top all the way around living his dreams. It's really cool. It was, it was a fun weekend.
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B
Yeah. And I got to spend some time with my Quantum speed crew on Friday and did some instructor training and it was so cool to be back at the ice and, and the passion of the hockey development and personal development. And it was so amazing. And we got to spend some time with my dad, my brother and the kids.
- [02:12]
A
Beautiful. So here we are. So one thing at the event, one of the presentations I do historically has been around mindset. You know what Alfonso and I agree on and align totally on is the fact that, you know, both of us have been working with real estate investors slash small business owners for many years and we often see that we teach how, we teach how, we show how, we do all of the things in the how tos, the mechanics of being successful in investing in real estate. And some people just don't do it. They can't seem to pull it off yet others getting the same instruction, the same how to, the same learning go out and crush it. So we definitely have come to believe and in our world prove that, you know, mindset does matter. And anyways, I did this particular presentation, but I'd been doing a lot of research over the weeks and you know, through that whole time of understanding, you know, what gets in our way. I came to the, what I called the presentation I did this weekend was 11 hidden beliefs that keep us stuck.
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B
Oh, wow.
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A
11 hidden beliefs that keep us stuck. And I have to say that it was a little uncomfortable. It was the first time I'd done the presentation. It was a. I thought it was like I'm second guessing myself a little bit. Should I, you know, does it really work in this room? You know, how's it going to land for people? And you know, it turns out that it landed really well. You know, I added a little bit of humor to it, kept it quite light, didn't go too deep. And anyway, so I thought today I could go through the Hidden 11 Beliefs that Keep you stuck.
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B
Okay, I love it. Hit me.
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A
You want to know what's keeping you stuck? Well, this is one that we've talked about many times. So and we know if we spend, you know, a bunch of time on any of the like all 11 of them or 10 of them or whatever, we kind of get to. We would be here all night. So they all get a little bit deep. We talked to this one a lot. But I do want to give us some context and the hidden belief, number one, I'm not enough. No matter what I do, it's never enough. I always feel like I should be doing more. I should be taller, better looking, more productive. And so I'm not enough. Is that belief that you haven't done, nor will you ever be enough.
- [04:34]
B
So when you talk about hidden belief, just break that down for a second. Is that it's what's in your way about achieving your goals? Or, or what is it? What, what, where did this come from?
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A
Well, it can, you can use all sorts of kind of metaphors or analogies about it, but think about it. If I'm not enough. You live in a world if you're not aware of it, by the way, and this is the key to it, you know, I'm not enough is. Is kind of a. We'll call it a feeling of inadequacy or being, some would say fundamentally flawed. But that doesn't mean we're aware of it. It's a kind of an operating system. I call it software that's running beneath the surface and it needs to be upgraded. You know, you need to first off, realize that your software isn't serving you, your operating system isn't running at peak, and you hidden, you run into the ceiling of limitations. Some would call it a constraint that you bump up against. It's like an invisible wall that you get to a place and it shuts you down. So at the end of the day, I'm not enough is in underneath. Like, so what's running underneath is who I am fundamentally is not enough. And it's a belief that drives us to either overachieve or to give up. And it underlies a lot of struggles that many people have in their lives. And we don't know what it is. So you and I have talked about it before. I don't know, I've experienced it many times. I cracked that code quite some time ago, but it could still show up, you know, but if you're aware of it, you can also keep it in check.
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B
So it's something that's in your way to achieve your goals is that this underlying belief system is that you're not enough.
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A
Well, I don't think it's about achieving goals, even, holy cow, we're going to be here all night. So I don't understand. No, no, it's a, it's a great question. I mean, it's, let's, let's, let's unpack it, let's create a really strong context for it. So it's not about achieving goals. So when we look at what are we trying to achieve in life really, you know, we want to have a great life. We want ease, we want flow, we want challenges, we want significance, we want a great lifestyle. So when you think about being stuck, what I'm talking about in this case is not just achieving goals, but it's having that freedom to be true to yourself, freedom to be yourself. You know, freedom to feel comfortable, whoever you are, with, whatever you bring to the table, no judgment, Understanding that who you are is enough. And yes, you're going to get smarter and you're going to work harder and do all of the things, but who you are right now, now is enough. And so what gets in our way and what keeps us stuck is the invisible wall that we bump up against that we hit it and then we play small or we back up. Oh, I'm not smart enough. Oh, you know something? If I was better looking. Nah, I don't want to go there. That's, I'm not nearly good. Look, they won't like me, you know, so it's all about, it's not just goals, it's about really leaning into who you truly are. And right now I'm on this whole kind of path of what is freedom. And freedom is the ability to be yourself and to discover who that is and be okay with it, you know, not hold yourself down. That's freedom, I believe. And so I'll give you an example. So I flew in today. This is not enough. This isn't a not enough example. But I'm. I'm flying in. And as you know, flying just kind of irritates me. I don't like it. You know, it's just like I. And I'm not afraid of flying. I just don't like the inconvenience of it. And I was in a particular airline and they're, you know, you bag this and do that. And I was just really annoyed. But I realized that in my annoyance, whatever I'm operating on top of is, I'm not free, right?
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B
Oh, good one.
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A
You follow? That charge owns me. That annoyance owns me. Oh, that's so good. I'm not free. So what I'm observing and I'm asking myself that question when something pisses me off, when I have maybe a moment of anxiety where I worried about one thing or another, I'm going, hold it. I. This is my constraint. I'm not free. What am I operating on top of? What is my limiting belief. And that's why these 11 limiting beliefs are important. But it's not about achieving goals.
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B
Got it? Okay, understood. Understood. I'm with you.
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A
You're with me?
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B
Yeah, hit me. What's number two?
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A
Okay, so now number. What number are we on? We haven't even finished number one yet. Okay, so I'm not enough. So no matter what I do, it's never enough. I always feel like I should be doing more, and I'm not enough. Is. Now this is in. This is really important because I'm going to go on to the next one and I'll come back to this, probably. So I'm not enough is the belief that you haven't done, nor will you be enough. Belief number two, Hidden belief number two that we operate on top of without knowing is I'm not worthy. And that is the belief that no matter what you do, you still don't deserve it.
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B
You haven't earned it.
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A
You haven't earned it. Doesn't matter what you do. I'm not worthy. You know, you, whatever you counter, you conquer Mount Everest. I don't know. And you're still not worthy. So it seems like it's not enough. One's internal, one's external, and that's what we have to differentiate. So all of these beliefs can sometimes cross over, but they operate on top of each other. But I'm not worthy is a belief that no matter what you do, you still don't deserve it. Now I've had this one, you've had this one, and we actually discussed this one a little bit in a different context. So a core belief of unworthiness or your lack of value and it can show up as a feeling of undeserving success. You don't deserve love, you don't deserve happiness, you don't deserve amazing relationship. And so it's that lack of worthiness. And you know, if you've ever had that, you know, deep down you may even feel to extreme, you may even feel worthless, right? Like you could go to that extreme. I'm not worthy, I'm actually worthless. And then probably in moments in time you may have that. Some people may go that deep in it, in the, you know, that feeling. And all of this by the way, comes from at some point, some, we'll call it childhood. And I don't like to use the word trauma because it's. But trauma's trauma, you know, and it could be varying degrees. You know, it doesn't have to mean that you were beat or mentally and emotionally abused. You know, it could be a sideways comment, it could be is any number of things. So I've shared this story before.
- [11:28]
C
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- [12:26]
A
I'll share it one more time. Not that anybody would remember including you. So I had a young lady, a you adol young lady that worked for me and she was like just a fricking mess. But she had come out of the military, she was all buttoned down, she was smart, she was articulate and I'm going but she would, she was just a cluster screw know like there would one every. So I finally sat her down, I said what is going on? And she, you know, teary eyed and she tells and gives me all these excuses and all these things that going on and, and I, you know pretty, I was really trying to be empathetic and compassionate listening to her and I didn't know what I said and it was a comment that I made and she said yeah my, my dad always told me if it wasn't for bad luck, you wouldn't have any luck at all. And I went bing. Can you imagine? Like we as parents. He's joking, you know, he's, he's actually trying to be compassionate with her, like understanding and he's saying oh gosh, you know, if it wasn't for bad luck, you wouldn't have any luck at all. Well, I mean grow up with that narrative going on in your head, innocent as it is and guess what, you're going to screw up. You know, all your luck's going to be bad. So I don't know if you got a comment on that but no, I.
- [13:43]
B
Just realized that as you're saying that I do remember that story and I remember just how it hit me is that when we say those things to our kids or to the people around us and we're not saying it with intention or we're saying it just to be funny, we don't know how it lands for the other person. Right. And we have to be mindful. And honestly these days, you know, I.
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A
Like correctness but keep in mind is that you know, these are all things that we learn growing up through child. It could be our parents, an aunt, a grandma, who knows. You know, it's like the, the Hoffman saying, which is it's, you know, everybody's.
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B
To blame and no, no, everybody's guilty. No one's to blame.
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A
Oh, everybody's guilty. Nobody to blame. There you go. So the point of it is that these things are innocent. How we take it on as kids growing up, you know, somebody else could have been saying that to a different kid and it would have been a whole different story for them. So, you know, it's. There's a psychology about it. So the whole point of bringing these 11 hidden beliefs that keep us stuck out, lift them up, is for people to work to identify them so that they can see what are they operating on top of. Because once you acknowledge them, once you see them, first you have to see it. You have to go, oh, look at that software that I'm running. I need to upgrade my operating system. And then you have to go back and collapse it. And sometimes it's as easy when I say collapse, you have to let it go, which is, you know, you can, you can do all sorts of techniques and that's a different conversation. But the point is, is it's not complicated really. And once you're aware of it, you can go, no, I can lean into that. I can bust through that. So that's the point.
- [15:22]
B
The positive and the negative. And that's what you mean by collapse is you can see both sides, right? Like you. And then they come to center and you get to neutral and you go, oh, okay. Then there's a state of grace, right?
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A
And let's. We're all over the map on this particular. But here's the thing about it. Let's. Let's talk about that. A positive and negative. In the world of quantum physics, in the world of energy, you can't have a positive without a negative, and vice versa. That's just energy. That is what makes the world go round. So you can't have all positive. Our intellect, how we process it, and emotionally even is we only look at the positive or we only look at the negative. And the reality of it is there's both sides to any situation. We just don't look at it that way. And of course, perspective and perception change as you look at what is a positive. So part of the game we all play is, or I'm playing always, is looking at something and going, what is about that is pushing my button. Where am I not free? One of the. I had an interesting conversation with a lady who at the event and she approached me afterwards. And one of the conversations that, or one of the things that I talked about within my presentation and sharing with the, with people was that, you know, things happen. You know, where do we take responsibility for what's happening in our life? Our life is a reflection of who we're being. That's, you know, really the kind of one of the foundational cornerstones of this podcast. And I, you know, I shared the story of somebody T bone me, wasn't my fault they hit me. I could have been a victim. I could have been really mad. And I was annoyed. Like, damn, I didn't want to write that vehicle off. Anyways, the point of it is, is that I look at it and I go, well, where could I have been responsible for that? And there's all sorts of places I might have been distracted for that specific moment. I could have avoided it if I would have been more heads up. I don't know. He came out through a stop sign. But ultimately, if I would have had my head up, maybe I could have seen him. So I look at it and go, where could it have been me? That's how I look at it. But the point is, I could be mad at him. And who does that serve?
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B
Yeah. Nobody.
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A
Nobody. That was what creates the dis.
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B
Ease or the victimness.
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A
I'm the victim, Ness. I'm angry. He doesn't feel my anger. I carry it around in my body. And you know, the old quote or whatever they call those cliches quotes that, you know, being angry at somebody or pissed off at somebody is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. It's us that is, you know, putting toxifying our body. Not in a good way.
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B
Totally. Let's go to number three. Let's work through these.
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A
Let's keep going. I'm not loved. And that's the belief that no one loves you. You're not lovable. Oh, yeah. And that's a subcon that really is a subconscious constraint and people don't know it. And then when they get caught up in all their stuff and then they try and do more and do too much and all the rest of it, you probably have a comment.
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B
Try too hard.
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A
Try too hard.
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B
Yeah, I don't have that one. I know I'm lovable.
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A
Yeah, you are loving and you are lovable. Yes, yes. But so a child who maybe experienced being abandoned. Right. So there are people that we know that had parents that bailed on them early when they were young for all sorts of reasons and doesn't matter, but you're left with that trauma of, oh, did they leave because they didn't love me? It's my fault. So parents get divorced. It's a common one. And you know, given how many parents are getting divorced, how many people are getting divorced, many of them. Parents think about how many people could be walking around out there operating on top of a software that says, I'm not loved. And it's hard to be in relationship because they kind of put this wall up they put this protection on, and. Because they don't want to risk it.
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B
That's so sad.
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A
They don't want to risk it. That's the underlying. What if I let this person in and we get deep in love and then they leave me? You see?
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B
Right.
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A
Yeah. Oh, so there's the other one.
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B
Yeah. All right, next.
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A
I'm not safe. You just kind of talked about it. So feeling unsafe or. Yeah. So feeling unsafe. Maybe you feel threatened. Lots of anxieties and fears, and it lays in our subconscious, and often it's. It goes back. And I don't want to be. I'm not trying to be a psychologist here by any stretch of the imagination. I'm not. But if you follow and connect the dots, these are incidents that happen generally when we are young and as young children. And. And yes, it can be parents as a family member. It could be a random thing, but something that happened that was unprecedentable, unpredictable. And it doesn't even have to have been an act of violence, by the way. It could have been something that. The kid fell off the table, you know, crawling up on the table. Parents, you know, like, he fell off the table, she fell off the table.
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B
They turned their back.
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A
Yeah.
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B
So when you say safe. So when you think about safety, Right. Like, that's such a big word. I'm not safe. Sometimes when I got on a plane, I don't feel safe. Or like, what is. What is what? What? When you say I'm not safe, how is that a hidden belief?
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A
Because you're these. You. You're an adult.
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B
I am.
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A
Yeah. We are all adults. We don't walk around thinking, I'm not safe. But when circumstances show up, maybe we're walking. Okay, so, for example, maybe we're walking into a meeting where we think we're going, where we don't feel safe. We're gonna. We feel like we're going to be.
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B
Yeah, got it. Okay, that makes sense. Yeah.
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A
You know, then what does it do? It hits the I'm not enough button, or I'm not worthy button, or I'm not. But it hits the I'm not save button.
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B
Got it. Oh, wow. Just think of how many layers this is happening with people on a daily basis. Like, I can relate. Every single time you're saying this, I'm, like, getting all of these four. These top four.
- [21:29]
A
Like, so think about it, you know? Okay, so, Stephanie, I got to tell your story because we already kind of told your story. Let's go back to the not. I'm not Worthy. Right. When you like. We're surprised that you got the award. That isn't announced yet, but you're getting a really significant award. And you said, is this spam? Like you said, is this spam you actually sent. And you. Yeah. Okay, well, what. Why would you do that? Somewhere that's. This is. You know, this is your psychology of my psychology, my assessment of my wife. I think you had a moment of you're not worthy, and it took you. I mean, you broke it real fast, but I think that was a moment of I'm not worthy, and you had to confirm it. So I thought it was cute because everybody around you thinks you totally deserve it, and so I thought it was cute.
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B
Yeah, I think you could be right. I think, because I always put other people ahead of me. I always put the team ahead of me, I will say, okay, we have to elevate the team, and we're a team.
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A
This is a pattern. That's. But see, that's the pattern of I'm not worried. Yes. That's one of the patterns.
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B
I'm not special.
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A
Yeah. And, oh, by the way, we hide it. Oh, gosh. Because this is one that I had to bust a little bit. We hide it behind humility.
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B
Oh. Ooh, that's. Oh, that's gross.
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A
Unreasonably humble. Annoyingly humble. You know, where they. Where they won't own their greatness, their success.
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B
Good one. But I can. I can support everybody else to win gold medals and be champions and be the best in the world, but of course, it's not about me.
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A
Yeah. Not about you. So there you go. Fun. Hank. Okay, so let's carry on. Let's carry on. So the whole point of these hidden, you know, understanding these hidden beliefs that keep us stuck is we're all adults. We're all functioning adults. We're doing. All. Doing okay, you know, like, to whatever degree. And we have our ups and downs emotionally, mentally, all the things that go on in life. But ultimately, for many, if you're listening to this podcast, you're one of the many that go, I want more. I want to be better. I want to be my, you know, the best version of myself, whatever that is. And I can't seem to make it. I feel stuck. You know, what do I bump up against that's stopping me? And it is the constraints, the hidden beliefs that keep us from being free. Right? You follow the thought process. I'm like, get it. Okay, that's it. Okay, here's the next one. I don't matter. Or you Know, it could be I'm. I. I'm not important. So it's one. It's where we don't believe that our needs matter. What we have to say matters. So in this case, whatever, again, you know, you grow up in the conditioning that you have. You get the message that maybe you. Or you read into a message that maybe you don't matter. And by the way, in, you know, some, let's face it, some kids, that's how they're raised, they don't matter, you know, and that's sadly the truth of what goes on in the world. But if you're that kid or you're not that kid, and maybe it was an innocent thing that was going on as you growing up, ultimately, we go where we put everybody ahead of us often and. Or we compromise what we need. We don't want to say what we need. We don't want to stand out and say, hey, could you do this? Would you do that? You know, we don't do that because, you know, until everybody else gets looked after, my needs don't matter.
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B
Right.
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A
So that can also show up where you're in this kind of constant state of feeling that anxiety or even spending time or putting a lot of energy into making sure others, you know, people pleasing would be that, you know, another one where your needs don't matter. Everybody in ahead of you, and you're going to be that person that brings those needs.
- [25:32]
B
Right. Oh, wow. Okay. Moving on.
- [25:35]
A
I'm not special, but you are, right? No, no, that's not that. So that's the hidden belief is I'm not special. I'm saying you, Stephanie, you're special.
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B
Yeah. No, sometimes I get that one.
- [25:48]
A
You do?
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B
I get that one. Yeah.
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A
So I'm not special that, you know, you don't believe you're unique. We're all unique, by the way. But if we measure ourselves against what's happening in, you know, to those that are, you know, posing on TikTok as an example, or our peers, maybe our. Even our siblings, you know, maybe we look at our siblings and go, they got it. And. But I've got nothing special. I'm not special. You know?
- [26:12]
B
Yeah, that's a big one. Next.
- [26:15]
A
Oh, gosh, you're pushing me through these. Okay. My needs don't matter. That is an. That is a belief that my needs not matter. I'm alone.
- [26:24]
B
Unpack that one.
- [26:26]
A
So that's a disconnection. You know, this is really, you know, there's a common phrase, it's lonely at the top, and we often hear where people feel alone and it's. They can be surrounded by friends, they can be surrounded by family, they can be in a public park or a store. Doesn't matter. And it's a disconnection. And just feeling fundamentally alone, unsupported. Or maybe you don't feel like you fit in. You know, I get that one. Yeah.
- [26:59]
B
I've never fit in. I'm kind of like socially awkward. Even my partners, business partners, friends have always said, she's just a little socially awkward. So that's why sometimes I just don't talk.
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A
It's because I talk too much. This, the other, the other thing, it was funny you said what you said, because within this operating system, within this belief, this constraint as we've called it, is someone with that tendency can literally feel socially isolated. Even early in their life when they're hanging out with other kids. They just don't jam with everybody and they feel, you know. So how do you find a sense of worthiness, a sense of wholeness, and believe that you are accepted the way you are and that you are special because you're special, because you're alive, you're a human being, you are special.
- [28:00]
B
That's. I think the, the, the ju. Position or the paradox in that is that, you know, I remember saying to one of my skaters when one year, he's the best in the world, Guillaume Cizeron, and I just remember working with him and saying, you know, we're talking about worthiness and love. And I just remember saying, you're worthy of love simply because you exist. Simply because you exist. And that moment between him and I, and we just connected on that moment, whether it was a. Something that he needed to hear or I need to say or whatever, is that we are all worthy of love simply because we exist.
- [28:45]
A
Yes. And that's because we're humans. Okay. We're moving on because we're. Okay, I've lost count. I'm. I'm powerless. Oh, whoa. Well, you know, it's. That's really. We see this a lot in the very close minded mindset. And it's a bit of a feeling of helplessness in certain situations and especially if you're also operating on top of I feel alone, where you feel like you can't change the situation. You know, I can't change the way I am. I can't change what I have going on. And so you don't have a strong purpose, a strong mission. You know, maybe you're in that whole TikTok of going to work Hating your job, but you're nine to five, you know, doing your thing and feel trapped. And so when we feel trapped, we feel powerless. We can't get out of this. And then we struggle and it comes out sideways and it shows up as anger or drinking or eating too much or whatever. A lot of these. And that's the other side of what happens with these hidden beliefs is they come out sideways. They, they, they show up in other ways. So when we're kind of self assessing all of this, you know, it takes time. And we've said many times, you know, we've said often on conversations is, you know, we have to think about what we're thinking about. We have to bring our awareness to repeated patterns, awareness to repeated feelings, thinking about what's actually in our way of feeling fully expressed or being fully ourselves or constantly feeling frustrated or angry or not enough, I can't do enough. I can't seem to please anybody. So there's all, you know, there's a lot of signs that go through it, you know, go through or. So there's a lot of signs that indicate it. But you have to go next level deeper thinking about it.
- [30:47]
B
Oh, yeah, I think this is, this is, this is heavy.
- [30:52]
A
I don't, I don't think it's that heavy. Well, I don't. I. It's not meant to be heavy. I think that ultimately it's just saying to listeners, you know, think about what you're bumping up against. You know, if you have not considered that you have hidden beliefs, if you've never considered that you are operating, you've got some old software that you may not be aware of and that it was software that was written, you know, back when you were a kid. It was software that got written in a moment of trauma, in a moment of ptsd. I mean, all of these things show up. So we look at our mental state. That's the whole point of the podcast. Mindset matters, you know, and pointing out that 11 hidden beliefs is really just intended to give people some context for, you know, what the hell's in my way? Why can't I be more, do more, achieve more, be happier, be more joyful, get more focused and be authentic doing it, and be authentic doing it. And be free. Be free to be yourself. Be free so that you don't give away your power to meaningless, that you can't control.
- [32:00]
B
So what's the next one?
- [32:01]
A
No, we're done.
- [32:02]
B
We're done. We did 11.
- [32:04]
A
I don't know, I've lost count. But.
- [32:08]
B
Do the whole list. Like go, like, do the whole list one to eleven.
- [32:12]
A
I'm not worthy. I'm not enough. I'm not loved. I'm not safe. I don't matter. I'm not special. There's something wrong with me. We didn't do that one. Did we do that one? There's something wrong with me. Might have missed that one.
- [32:28]
B
Yeah.
- [32:29]
A
Or I'm not who I should be. So the feeling of being defective, you know, that, you know, if there's something, something wrong with me. Actually I just wrote on that one. I can't believe I missed this one. Yeah, I just did a whole piece on this, you know, where the feeling of being defective or being wrong, I can't do anything right. That might be one of the really big painful self judgments that, you know, something's got to be wrong with me. So this would be a really common. You know, I think there are times probably where you've met people that are really uber creative and they just don't seem to fit in. They are back to being socially awkward and they can't. It's a. They, they think, gosh, I'm nobody's like me. They haven't owned the fact that they are special, that they are creative. And you're not going to fit into certain worlds. And that has nothing to do with the fact that there's anything wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with you.
- [33:27]
B
One of a kind. Yeah, one of a kind. You're like a snowflake. You know, that's the great thing. Did you know I did the math the other day, you know, do you know that it takes. It's like 4 trillion to one that we've even been born like a sperm. Meaning 4 trillion to one.
- [33:45]
A
Yeah. How does numbers work?
- [33:46]
B
If we don't think we're special, then honestly, then that's programming that we need to bust. And I think, I love, I love this, Han, that you came up with these 11 things.
- [33:55]
A
Okay, we'll unpack these over the show. Like, they can really get fun, by the way. So it's not meant to be heavy. I think it's actually quite freeing. It's quite enlightening to go, oh, so you mean I'm not all messed up? I'm not all screwed up. Well, we all are. But, you know, you know, when we look at what it is we're trying to do to discover how can we be more joyous, be more happy, achieve the results that we want, you know, grow, be bigger, better, whatever our goals are. Like, whatever Our vision is for ourself. And then there's that whole place of, you know, how are you in your relationship? How are you socially? How are you with your family? It just gives you a place to kind of enter and say, okay, well, maybe I'm not losing my mind. I don't need a psychologist. And there is a place where there's some work I can do, think about what I'm thinking about, bring my awareness to it. And we could actually, you know, unpack, give some tools, you know, to say, okay, how do we identify that? You know, think, maybe do some breathing and some visualization, of course, some journaling. But first you have to look at it and go, oh, you know something. I keep bumping up against this. So I think in the coming shows we'll talk more about it. I think that might be good.
- [35:07]
B
I love that. I think that there's some offshoots to all of these that I think we can really play around with. And I'm loving it. And I think this came out of our trip to Sedona, you know, and. And us and connecting.
- [35:22]
A
So we're off the list again. We're off the list again.
- [35:24]
B
Off the list.
- [35:25]
A
Come on. Again. Okay, so we stopped. We got to there's something wrong with me because that's the one I missed. And then my needs don't matter and I'm alone. And again, I've lost count. I'm powerless. Yeah, yeah, that's the last one I had on my list. So I may have missed one or two. I don't know. I've lost count.
- [35:47]
B
What if. What if there's one about, you know.
- [35:50]
A
There'S one about money?
- [35:52]
B
About money.
- [35:53]
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [35:53]
B
I love that one because that one is one I had to bust early on. But anyway, hun, I think these are great. I think we should unpack these, like, one at a time. I don't know if our listeners would be up for that, but I would love to take each one of those and unpack it and go, let's talk about powerlessness. What does that even mean? Like, yeah, you know, I think about, you know, the skaters I work with or the business people I work with and. And what got in their way around decisions. Right?
- [36:22]
A
Yeah, I just hit the. My chair button.
- [36:26]
B
Like, what was that? That was super cute. You're adorable.
- [36:32]
A
Oh, boy.
- [36:33]
B
Oh, you're hilarious.
- [36:35]
A
Okay. And by the way, number 11 was there is never enough money, which is that whole scarcity mindset. And it's the old story of the, you know, people with a billion dollars have the. I, I don't have enough money that, you know. So all to say that these again are things for us to consider as we contemplate who we're being, why we can't maybe move forward in a particular business deal or move forward in our career or move forward in our relationship or have a more powerful relationship with our significant other. These are all things that get in our way. But we have a tendency is to look outside. We blame circumstances, we blame the election, we blame the government. I had to slide one in there about politics. But the point is, is we have a tendency as people to look outside. And it's not an outside job, it's an inside job. And that's why mindset matters.
- [37:48]
B
Wow, I love this. I can't wait to unpack all these things. Hun, I'm so proud of you. And you've really busted through a lot of your own stuff. I've busted through some of mine.
- [37:58]
A
Quit it. I'm not worthy.
- [38:00]
B
I'm not worthy.
- [38:03]
A
But you know what?
- [38:04]
B
Next week we're going to be able to talk about my award and that maybe I am worthy.
- [38:09]
A
No, not next week. Week after.
- [38:12]
B
Week after. Okay. Awesome.
- [38:14]
A
Because you got to go away to get it.
- [38:16]
B
I do.
- [38:17]
A
And leave the hood.
- [38:19]
B
I know.
- [38:20]
A
Okay, well, hopefully this has been helpful. And I don't know, I don't know how this is going to land for listeners. It was a little herky jerky, but it was still fun.
- [38:29]
B
No, I loved it. It was fun.
- [38:32]
A
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for listening. If you found value in the podcast, please take the time to rate and review and share with others. Share with your friends as it is my goal to always improve and to provide the highest value for you, the listener. If you have any comments, suggestions or questions you'd like answered, please email email me at CEO@raincanada.com. that's CEO@reincanada.com. i look forward to hearing from you. And until next time, Patrick O.