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If you don't have fit, you don't have style. I wish I could take credit for that quote because it is so true, but I believe credit belongs to Stacy and Clinton from the US Version of what not to Wear. Regardless of who said it, though, fit is fundamental to style. You can follow all the trends and buy all the right things for your body shape and all your best colors. But if your clothes don't fit you well, your style isn't going to come together. So today I'm going to share five big mistakes I see women make when it comes to fit. Let's get started. Hello, gorgeous. Welcome back to the Everyday Style School, the show that teaches you everything your mom never did about getting dressed. I'm your host, Jennifer Mackie. Mary After 25 years of dressing women with real bodies, budgets, and lives, I know great style isn't about following one size fits all advice. It's about learning what works for you. If you listened to my last episode, you know that this semester we're focusing on style fundamentals, the basics that make style easy in the long run. Truly understanding these things is like the difference between being being able to follow a recipe and actually knowing how to cook. Yes, you can go through life just following recipes. Lots of people do. But when something goes wrong, you won't know why, and you'll never be able to make a meal without a recipe. On the other hand, when you truly learn how to cook, you know how to fix a recipe gone wrong or how to avoid mishaps altogether. You know how to get the flavors you want. And most importantly, you don't need your phone to cook dinner every single night. Style is the same way. You can follow the wear this, not that list or get a box of clothes sent to you every month. Or you can learn how to dress yourself for life and not be dependent on those things forever. Mastering the fundamentals is the way to go, so that's what we're going to be focused on. Also in that episode, I gave you a preview of some of the topics that were going to be talking about this season. And I told you we'd be talking about fit because it truly is the most fundamental of all the fundamentals. So that seemed like a really good place to start. All season long, we're going to be talking about things that I've probably talked about before. After six years, it's hard not to say the same thing over and over a couple of times at least, right? But it's my goal to try and bring you something new that might prove difficult to do. But I'm going to do my very best. I've dedicated an entire episode to the basics of proper fit, which is a very old episode, but everything in it is still true. So we're going to link to that in the show notes and you can go check it out. Which means that today I want to bring you something else, something new. So I thought I'd talk about where fit goes wrong, the most common issues I've seen over the years that are keeping women from having better style, even when they're buying clothes. That should be great. I've got five of them. But before we get started, I just want to remind you that we are wrapping up our semester with a Q and A episode. So if you have questions you'd like me to answer, head to the show notes and send it in. All right. The first mistake women make when it comes to fit is confusing fit with fit. And if you're like, well, now I'm confused, let me explain. When it comes to clothing, the word fit has a lot of different meanings. First, it can be slang for outfit like fit check. Or like my 13 year old says to me, the fit is fire. I think that means I have a good outfit on anyway. It can also mean to be of the right size. Thank you, Dictionary.com which is what we're talking about in general in this episode. But it can also be another way to describe the cut of the garment, which is where the confusion comes in. In this last use of fit or cut, what we're really talking about is how close to the body the item is supposed to sit. So you have things like a bodycon fit, which is supposed to be super, super close to the body. And then you have fitted, which is supposed to be close to the body. Then you have regular fit, relaxed fit, and oversized fit. That is not all of the cuts or all the fits out there, but it gives you kind of an idea of the spectrum of fits or cuts that you'll find in jeans. I am sure that you've seen things like relaxed fit or baggy fit, right? Yeah, that's what we're talking about. What happens is that to get a more relaxed cut, something roomier and less close to the body, oftentimes what women will do is just size up. I see this all the time on Instagram influencers saying, size up for a more relaxed fit. And to some extent this can work, especially if you are in between two sizes. You can choose, do I want it to be a little closer to the body or do I want to have a little bit more of a roomy fit. This summer I ended up buying the same T shirt in two sizes. I couldn't figure out if I liked the way the medium or the large looked more, so I bought them both. And I wore the medium when I had bottoms with more volume to balance things out, and I wore the large when my bottoms were more fitted. But in both sizes, the hallmarks of proper fit were still there. Again, if you don't know what those are, go back and check out that old episode. However, this isn't always a winning strategy because as a garment increases in size, so does everything else. Sleeves get longer, armholes get lower, neck openings get bigger. All of those things throw off how a garment fits, meaning to be of the right size. To get clothes that have the closeness to your body that you're looking for, you have to adjust with cut, not size. So if you want jeans that don't hug your hips and rear, instead of buying regular fit jeans in a size or two too big by relaxed or loose fit jeans, this is how you get the fit you want without sacrificing the hallmarks of proper fit. When a top is an oversized cut, it still fits somewhere. Like the neck is the right size or the sleeves are the right length, or the body's the right length. Just sizing up throws off the entire thing and makes you look sloppy. And if you're thinking, yeah, but I see that on Pinterest and Instagram all the time, I'm just going to be brutally honest with you and tell you that A there is a ton of manipulation that goes into a lot of those photos, so you don't really know what you're seeing. Right? And B, the other thing is, this is a strategy that doesn't work as well for real women in their 30s and 40s and beyond as it does on social media. And I never want to say, oh, women of a certain age or a certain size can't wear something. I don't believe that. However, there is a difference between a 22 year old on Pinterest in a ridiculously oversized sweatshirt and a real woman in her 40s and 50s in a ridiculously oversized sweatshirt. Somehow we just don't do that little cute thing quite as easily. Anyway, how do you fix this one? The best thing you can do is read labels. Start reading item descriptions online as if they were food labels. Like, is this thing made out of When I was shopping for fall capsule pieces, I came across a sweater that just said soft tunic sweater. Okay, well that doesn't give me much info, but in the description it said, this cozy sweater combines comfort and style with its relaxed fit. There you go. That's the word we're looking for to tell us how is this going to sit on our body. This then you can use those words to get the cut you want instead of trying to get there by manipulating the size. Mistake number two goes along with that, which is not understanding the relationship between size and proportion. Back in the day of low and even mid rise jeans, I used to struggle a lot because I have a long torso. So a lot of tops left me with like an inch or two of belly exposed, which is not what I was going for then, it's not what I was going for now. Never, ever, ever, right? But I remember being in a store and I found this top that I loved, but I just needed a little bit more length. So even though I know better, I was like, well, I'll just try it in a bigger size in order to get some extra length. One size up helped, but it didn't solve the problem. Two sizes up solved the length problem. But now the shirt just didn't look right on me anymore. Came to my senses. I left it in the store. But even I can fall into that. Well, if I just manipulate with fit, maybe it'll work. In my summer short series that we just finished, I noticed a theme that came up a few times which was solving the right problem. And this is an example of that. The problem wasn't that the top didn't fit me, it was that it was too short for my body, the shirt's proportions didn't match mine, and by sizing up, I I was solving the wrong problem. Let me give you another example, one that I have personally seen play out hundreds of times with my clients. Women with curvy bodies, meaning your waist is smaller than your hips and rear. Right? Women with curvy bodies sizing up in pants to get them to fit their hips, which then resulted in a huge gap in the back of the waistband. If you know, you know, why does this happen? Because they were solving the wrong problem. It wasn't that the original pants were too small, it was that they didn't fit their proportions right. When we put them in jeans or pants with the correct proportions, that is curvy fit pants, they almost always went down at least one size and then the pants fit in the hips and no more gap in the back of the waist. This applies to petites too. I am not joking when I tell you that almost all of the one on one clients I've worked with in the last couple of years who have come to me because they're frumpy and frustrated. Nothing looks good. They all have one thing in common. You want to know what it is? They're petites who aren't buying petites more than once, more than one occasion. When I tell them that this is the entire problem, I've heard them say, well, but I have things tailored and. And by this they mean they have their pants hemmed. But petite clothing is an entire set of proportions that cannot be fixed by either buying regular sizes a size smaller or just by tailoring one part. The pocket and the knee placement is different on petite jeans. And that doesn't change when you have them hemmed. And you can shorten a sleeve, but are you fixing the armhole too? If not, it's not going to fit you properly. You've got to understand your body's proportions and find clothes that mirror them. If not, your clothes are never going to look right. Fit mistake number three is thinking sizes mean anything at all. The other day I was getting dressed and I had a little chuckle to myself. I was thinking about this episode actually, and I realized that the pants that I was wearing were a small and the tank I was wearing was an extra large and the cardigan over all of it was a medium. And they all fit perfectly. I wouldn't have wanted to size up or down in anything. The truth is, sizes are completely meaningless beyond a starting point. But they lead to ill fitting clothes in a few ways. The first way, being unwilling to size up because you think a letter or a number says something about who you are as a person. I was talking to a potential client a few years ago. We ended up not working together. You'll see why in a second. But she reached out to me because she had gained weight, nothing fit, she was feeling bad about herself and she was struggling to get dressed every day because she literally had no clothes. Okay, cool. We can work with that. I love to work with that. Except she also refused to buy anything bigger than a size 16 and she would not consider plus sizes. Okay, well that, that changes things, right? She said that that was just her mental threshold. She couldn't do it. She wouldn't do it. That was it. She was not plus size and refused to buy plus sizes. So as long as I could find clothes that fit her and made her feel good at the current size she was wearing, she was in. But at that point I was out. This is an extreme example of making Sizes mean something, but I saw it dozens of times when I was shopping with clients and I would suggest that we try a bigger size. And so many times they would just reduce reject what could have been a great item because they refuse to size up. Now the flip side of that is women refusing to believe that a smaller size fits them. Like, I can't be as small, so I'll get the medium. Often this is rooted in strong feelings about vanity sizing, which I'm going to come back to in a minute, so just hold that thought. But this is especially prevalent when online shopping. Even if the fit says relax or oversize, and even if all the reviews say it runs big, we still think, well, no, that won't be true for me. I'll just get my regular size. And then we keep things that actually don't fit. And when it doesn't fit, when it's too big, you look bigger than you are, which reinforces the idea that you're a larger size. And the cycle continues. So stop shopping with your mind mirror because she is a lying liar who lies. We need to rely on objective things like the hallmarks of proper fitness before we get to vanity sizing. Let's talk about the third way that ascribing meaning to sizes hurts your style. And that is assuming you're the same size everywhere or even within one brand. Fun fact, the small pants and extra large tank I had on were from the same brand. And I have extra smalls and extra larges from Zara and everything in between. And you know what? I don't care. Now it does mean I won't shop online at Zara because Zara is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get. I accept their lack of consistency and I work around it. Would it be lovely if sizes were consistent between stores and brands or even within stores and brands? Yes, but that's not the way it works. And you can either spend your time being mad about it and wearing ill fitting clothes or. Or accept it and work with it. I choose to work with it. Again, reading online descriptions and reviews tells you so much. But you have to accept that sizes are fluid at best and sometimes even completely meaningless. So let's talk about vanity sizing. If you're not familiar with the term, vanity sizing is this idea that retailers increase the size of clothes while keeping the label the same to make us feel good about ourselves. Do I believe in vanity sizing? Yes and no. I completely agree that clothing sizes have gotten bigger over the years. I know we've all heard that whole Marilyn Monroe was a size 16. And it's supposed to be this message of, like, body positivity and size inclusivity. And I am all for those things. But let's be honest. Marilyn Monroe was not a 21st century size 16. Sizes have changed. I worked with a client who had a ton of Talbot's clothes from decades past. Like, she had things that were 20, 30 years in there, and they were like a size 10 12. But when we got to Talbot's to do a refresh for her wardrobe, she was a size 4 to 6, and she said her body had not changed. So, yes, sizes have changed, but is that because Talbot or any other brand wanted her to feel better about herself? Or. Or is it a reflection of the changing customer? Women are bigger now than they were in the 50s or even a couple of decades ago. And I have this idea that sizing is a reflection of the store's customer rather than a standard, unchanging measurement. Let's say a medium is the middle, the average size of a store's customer. I understand that it's not. Don't. Don't come for me, but let's just go with it for the sake of this argument. Talbot's average sized woman in 1995 looks different than Talbot's average sized woman today. So did they change the size to make her feel better about herself, or did they change sizes to say this is the range of the typical woman who shops here? And maybe it doesn't matter which came first or what the reason is when you're talking about sizes within one brand, but it does matter when you're going from store to store. We kind of have this idea that a medium should be a medium everywhere, that it is somehow a standard measurement. But like I've said before, it is not. It is a reflection of the brand or the store's customer. A medium at Chico's is going to be very different than a medium woman at Aritzia. The average woman shopping at Aritzia is in her 20s. The average woman shopping at Chico's is in her 50s or 60s. She's been through menopause. Her midsection's a little fuller. Those women are different. But a medium in each store reflects that middle size of each customer base. So when people say things like it fits true to size, the best it can really mean is that it fits true to size for that brand or that store. And the best you can really do is know what you usually wear in that brand or that store and use that as a starting point, but don't assume that it transfers over to other stores and other brands. The solution to all of this is to spend less time and energy wondering why sizes aren't consistent, or worrying about what the letter or number on a tag means about you, and instead focus on knowing your usual size within your favorite brands and use that as a starting point to find things that fit properly. And if you're thinking, oh, but that's so hard to do online. Yes, yes it is. And it isn't going to change. Your choices are to shop in person, be committed to buying a couple of sizes and returning the ones that aren't right, or accept ill fitting clothes. That's pretty much it. Let's move on to the fourth fit mistake women make, and that is not understanding how fabrics affect fitness. This happens in a couple of ways. I know that if I'm choosing a top in a woven fabric, it's probably going to have to be a size bigger than I would choose if it was in a knit, because the woven top doesn't have the give or the stretch to accommodate my broader shoulders, whereas the knit will move with me, making the smaller size a better option. But on the other hand, stretch isn't always your friend, especially when there's too much stretch. There's a fabric that I hate, and this is me personally. There is nothing wrong with this fabric. It's great for a lot of people, but I hate it. And that is a stretchy sweater. I hate a stretchy sweater. Case in point, the Old Navy so soft cardigan. Again, there's nothing wrong with this sweater. It's actually a really great piece, which is why I convinced myself to try it every couple of seasons before remembering that this is not for me. This sweater has 3% spandex in it, which makes it clingy. And I think my fellow Apple sisters can agree that clingy tops are not the thing, right? No thank you. Every time I try one on, it clings and I think, oh, it's too small, so I'll just try a bigger size and you know what? It still kind of clings. That's just what this fabric does. A lot of women would size up until the sweater isn't clinging to their midsection or. But at that point the sweater just doesn't fit it. Now the sweater is too big because it was never the size it was the fabric. Trying something like a sweater with rayon or modal instead, something that helps it drape instead of cling is fixing the right Problem. And I've seen this a lot with women whose lower bodies are bigger than their upper bodies when they try to wear blouses that end at the hip. Blouses are made from woven fabrics which typically have no give. So the top is tight at the hip where it ends. Right? And a lot of women think they need to size up. Nope, it was just the wrong fabric for their proportions, causing a proper fit. Sizing up doesn't help because, yes, maybe now it hits at the hip, but it no longer fits at the neck and the shoulders and the sleeve. Even the way fabric is dyed can affect the way it fits. Have you ever noticed that black and really dark blue denim run smaller than light or medium washes? You are not crazy. They really do feel different, even if they're cut the same. The dyeing process can make the fibers stiffer and less stretchy and more dense. So if you love a pair of black jeans and think, oh, I'll just buy the same pair in blue, don't be surprised if they end up being too big. On the flip side, if you love your medium wash jeans, don't be shocked if the dark blue version doesn't fit the same way and you need to size up. The last mistake women make when it comes to fit is unwillingness to tailor. Something I've heard a lot over the years is along the lines of, this wasn't expensive. I'm not going to bother tailoring it. And on the surface, that makes sense. Like, it kind of feels wrong to spend almost as much altering your pants as you spent buying them in the first place. But another perspective is that the less you pay for your clothes, the more likely things are to need alterations, because the more mass produced something is, the less likely it is to fit you perfectly. And I think a good question to ask yourself is, why did you buy it in the first place? For example, did you buy that skirt because it was cheap? And who cares if it's great? It's just a fun thing that you'll wear a couple of times? Or did you buy it because you loved it and you want to look as good as possible in the first scenario, great, fine, don't bother tailoring it in the second one, though, it really doesn't matter what you paid for it. If you love it and you want to get as much wear out of it as possible and you want to look as good as possible, tailoring is an investment. And if you struggle with seeing the value in alterations, try looking at it like tailoring is an investment in you and Your style rather than an investment in the skirt. Not wanting to tailor something because it's not an investment piece is being price focused, whereas being committed to having clothes that fit well regardless of how much you paid for them is being value focused. And if you don't know the difference between the two, I've got a bunch of episodes on the topic, but the short answer is price is about cost and value is about worth. How good does it look? How much wear can you get out of it? How good do you feel in it? Those are the things that make a piece truly valuable in your wardrobe, not how much you paid for it. One of our Style Circle members recently posted that she hasn't bought or kept anything that didn't fit well in over a year and she has been shocked at the difference in the quality of her wardrobe. Everything looks better, it's more wearable and she has more complete outfits just by focusing on the fit. And if you can get there right off the rack, great. I believe most women can improve fit by at least 50% without tailoring just by doing the first four things that we talked about today. But if your body is hard to fit or you've done the best you can but the fit still isn't there, don't discount how much value you tailoring your clothes will add to your wardrobe. Yes, it's an additional cost, but in most cases it's absolutely worth it. Before we wrap up, I want to share a bonus mistake women make when it comes to fit. And it's one I've talked about before, but honestly, without fixing this one, the others are kind of pointless. And that is knowing what fit actually looks like. I worked with a client who said on her pre service questionnaire that she was a size 14, but when we were together she was closer to an 8 or a 10. So I asked her what made you think that you were a 14? Or what made you think that these clothes fit? And she said, well, they stay on my body. I mean, they. I guess they did sort of, kind of. Her pants were being held up with belts and her skirts were sitting at her hips instead of her waist. But either way, that's a pretty low bar for fit. It stays on my body. Fit is something that's difficult to see until you see it, but once you see it, you can't unsee it. I know that that is just a terrible sentence, but. But it's true. Once you see what fit is supposed to look like, you can't unsee it. But it takes some time to get There. The episode I referenced earlier will help you start to know what to look for. But a really good thing to do is next time you're in a store that sells clothes, try something on in the size you think you are, and then one size bigger and one size smaller or two sizes bigger and two sizes smaller. And if you really want to see like extremes, take pics to compare. Look for the gapping, the pulling, the pooling, the draping that I talk about in the Basics of Proper Fit episode and start to recognize it. Once it clicks, you will see it forever. Real quick, let's recap what we talked about today. First, if you don't have fit, you don't have style. You can buy all the right things, but if they don't fit you well, your style is not going to come together on your body the way it does in your mind. The mistakes we make with fit often have to do with solving the wrong problem. Whether it is cut, proportion, fabric, we think a different size will make things better. And while it might solve one problem, it often causes others. So make sure you're solving the right problem. Don't get attached to sizes. They are a starting point, but beyond that they are largely meaningless. Get to know the sizing of your favorite brands, but even then, read the descriptions and the reviews to get the right fit. And if you can't get a good fit off the rack, don't be afraid of investing in your style by tailoring. Shift your perspective and ask yourself, if something isn't worth tailoring, does it really deserve a spot in your wardrobe at all? That alone might keep you from adding a whole lot of pieces that are fine, but don't get worn. Your homework for this episode is to just look at the fit of your clothes. If you don't know how they should fit, listen to that oldie but goodie episode. Try different sizes on in a store and every day you get dressed objectively. Look at the fit of your clothes and see how you're doing. Ask yourself, is there anything I would change? Does it look a little big? Does it look a little small? Is it comfortable? Does it feel too big? Whatever it is, awareness is really the first step to mastering this style fundamental. That's it for this episode of the Everyday Style School. Thank you for spending time with me today. If you are ready to make style easier and more fun, come join me in the Style Circle. It's where you'll get all of our classes, capsule guides and style tools, plus the support to actually use them. Become a member today at your everyday style dot com. I'll see you next time. And until then, stay stylish.