Episode Overview

Podcast: The Five
Date: October 17, 2025
Main Theme:
This episode explores escalating anti-ICE protests connected to the “No Kings” rallies, debates around Second Amendment rights and protest tactics, and reactions to political developments, including debates in New York, the Fetterman primary rumors, and lighter stories like Governor Pritzker’s casino win. The five co-hosts dissect news, political strategy, and their cultural implications with their characteristic blend of sharp commentary and humor.

Key Discussion Points

1. Anti-ICE Clashes and the “No Kings” Protests

• Protest Background:
  • 16 arrested at a Broadview, Illinois ICE facility (“a common occurrence now...every Friday morning” [00:15]).
  • “No Kings” nationwide rallies are being promoted as a defense of democracy.
• Don Lemon Clip:
  • Lemon calls for minorities to arm themselves: “Go out in your place where you live and...get a gun legally…Because when you have people knocking on your door and taking you away without due process as a citizen, isn’t that what the Second Amendment was written for?” ([01:04-01:36])

Panel Reactions

• Joey Jones:
  • Skeptical of Lemon’s logic: “This isn’t tyranny. This is the law…If anything happens to an ICE agent, Don Lemon now has blood on his hands” ([03:02]).
• Jessica Tarlov:
  • Raises concerns about constitutional overreach:
    • Notes ICE’s history of detaining Americans without due process and catalogues Trump administration actions cited as authoritarian ([04:10-06:02]).
• Jesse Watters:
  • Mocks Democratic protest culture: “Every time you guys get together, someone dies or there’s a lot of fires” ([07:02]).
  • Applauds Don Lemon’s newfound support of the Second Amendment, jokes about gifting Jessica a gun ([07:50-08:48]).
• Greg Gutfeld:
  • Describes protests as an “imaginary solution for an imaginary problem,” tying mass protest energy to media-induced hysteria ([09:02-12:27]).
  • Criticizes Don Lemon’s “armed uprising” rhetoric in light of tragic violence.

Notable Quote:

• Joey Jones: “The Second Amendment is in part to repel tyranny. This isn’t tyranny. This is the law.” ([03:02])

2. Assessing the “No Kings” Movement and Trump’s Response

• Trump (via Maria Bartiromo):
  • Dismisses accusations of acting like a king: “They’re referring to me as a king. I’m not a king.” ([02:43-02:50])
• Jessica Tarlov:
  • Focuses on alleged constitutional violations and accuses Trump of aspiring to king-like powers ([04:10-06:02]).
• Greg and Jesse:
  • Argue the movement is more about emotional release and anti-Trump hysteria than substantive grievances ([09:02-12:27]).

3. Media Coverage and Protest Optics

• Panel lambasts the “Dress Up” Protesters:
  • Light mocking of costumes and youth protest culture (references to “furries,” Pikachu) with the underlying point that theatrical protest undermines arguments ([06:02-06:32]).
• Jesse Watters:
  • Contrasts “No Kings” rallies with earlier Tea Party movement (“Ours was a little more organic. This seems a little more astroturfed…there was money raised, there was policies behind it. And it got a lot of traction…” [07:14-07:34]).

4. Political Debates and Local Races

New York Mayoral Debate

• Recap of Candidates:
  • Zoran Mamdani, Andrew Cuomo, Curtis Sliwa bicker over policing, experience, and reform ([14:08-15:21]).
• Martha MacCallum:
  • Critiques Zoran’s shifting stance on Hamas (“He smiled, he said, absolutely, Hamas needs to lay down their arms. So this is…something that he thought about after an unsuccessful exchange…” [16:24])
• Panel:
  • Jokes about qualifications (“Even Greg could be mayor…one guy killed everyone’s grandparents, the other guy’s never had a job, the other guy lives with cats” [17:57-18:15]).
• Jessica Tarlov:
  • Points to authenticity as a winning trait: “This entire election has been about authenticity more than policy” ([19:51]).
  • Highlights a memorable debate line: “What I lack in experience, I make up for in integrity…” ([19:51-20:19])
• Greg Gutfeld:
  • Critiques rich elites fueling radicalism: “Our rich are more extreme than the poor in other countries. That’s kind of freaky.” ([21:33])

Virginia Attorney General Race

• Jay Jones’ apology for violent texts:
  • Public mea culpa: "I am ashamed. I am embarrassed. And I'm sorry...I cannot take back what I said." ([15:39])
• Joey Jones:
  • Questions sincerity: “If you're really sorry, you wouldn't be running…” ([16:03])

5. Fetterman and Democratic Divisions

• Axios Report:
  • Rumors of a primary challenge to Sen. John Fetterman. Framing this as Democrats plotting a “coup” ([24:53-25:17]).
• Jessica Tarlov:
  • Pushes back against the “coup” framing, says primaries are healthy contests of ideas ([25:57]).
• Greg Gutfeld:
  • Attributes intra-party tensions to Fetterman's refusal to engage in identity politics ([28:03-28:56]).
• Joey Jones:
  • Praises Fetterman’s authenticity and willingness to engage with opposing arguments ([29:56-31:36]).
• Martha:
  • Notes Democrats may stick with Fetterman for strategic reasons despite discord ([27:25]).

Notable Quotes:

• Joey Jones: “I could go hang out and watch a football game with John Fetterman and not be repulsed by…the last five things he said on TV.” ([30:44])
• Greg Gutfeld: “You just need one person to speak up to the mob. And then everybody comes in and they share the risk.” ([28:56])

6. Lighter Segment Highlights

JB Pritzker’s Casino Winnings

• Topic: Illinois Gov. Pritzker wins $1.4 million gambling in Las Vegas ([32:25-33:29]).
• Jesse Watters:
  • Downplays the sum compared to Pritzker’s fortune, jokes about “high limit table” strategy ([33:04]).
• Greg Gutfeld:
  • “He puts the roll in high rollers…it is peanuts for [him]. The guy loves to gamble because he loves the buffet. One addiction feeds another.” ([33:52])
• Joey Jones:
  • Defends Pritzker’s right to keep the winnings: “That’s probably the most honest money that man’s ever earned.” ([34:24])

Roommate Annoyances & Personal Quirks (FMO Friday)

• Hosts share amusing self-criticisms and habits ([34:58-37:34]).

Personal Reflection

• Joey Jones’ tribute to Marcus Burleson:
  • “Mark, like many of us, was not a perfect man, but he was truly a perfect friend...I’ll miss him here on Earth, but if I make it to heaven, he'll be…arms wide open, ready to welcome me.” ([39:01-39:52])

Uplifting Story

• Jessica Tarlov:
  • Highlights 80-year-old Natalie Grabo completing the Ironman World Championship ([39:56-40:17]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Don Lemon (via clip):
  • “Go out in your place where you live and get a gun legally...Isn’t that what the Second Amendment was written for?” ([01:04-01:36])
• Joey Jones:
  • “If anything happens to an ICE agent, Don Lemon now has blood on his hands.” ([03:02])
• Jessica Tarlov:
  • “[No Kings Day is about] the lack of respect for the Constitution and the laws of this country…starting with the basics: signing an executive order to do away with birthright citizenship…” ([04:10])
• Greg Gutfeld:
  • “It’s a perfect example of an imaginary solution for an imaginary, imaginary problem.” ([09:02])
• Jesse Watters (on giving Jessica a gun):
  • “Even Jessica should get a gun to protect herself—from Greg.” ([08:05])
• Joey Jones (on Fetterman):
  • “The best part of Congress are those that aren't so adherent to one line list of talking points…” ([30:44])
• Greg Gutfeld (on no kings protest):
  • “You can't spell no kings without no kin. A lot of these people just don't have family, and this is what they do.” ([11:30])

Quick Segment Timestamps

• Anti-ICE Protest Recap & Don Lemon Clip: 00:05–01:36
• Panel Response on Second Amendment/Protests: 03:02–09:00
• Trump Responds to ‘King’ Label: 02:43–02:52
• New York Mayoral Debate and Critique: 14:08–21:30
• Fetterman Democratic ‘Coup’ Discussion: 24:53–31:59
• Pritzker’s Vegas Winnings: 32:25–34:40
• FMO Friday—Roommate Annoyances: 34:58–37:34
• Joey’s Memorial for Burleson: 39:01–39:52
• Oldest Ironman Finisher: 39:56–40:22

Summary Conclusion

This episode of The Five delivers a high-energy blend of news analysis, political satire, and personal banter. Major themes are government power versus protest, shifting boundaries on gun rights, the performative nature of political activism, and the internal divisions within the Democratic Party. Throughout, the hosts combine pointed debate with humor, often lampooning political figures and each other, but also providing space for serious and heartfelt commentary, particularly in moments of remembrance and inspiration.