Podcast Summary: The Five

Episode: “Detained” Hoax
Host: Martha MacCallum, with Paul Morrow, Jessica Tarlov, Jesse Watters, and Tyrus
Date: January 24, 2026

Overview

This episode of “The Five” tackles headline news, focusing primarily on the alleged ICE detention of a five-year-old boy in Minnesota—a story the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) has called a “horrific smear." The panel dissects media narratives, political reactions, the complexities of immigration law enforcement, and the state of public discourse around such incidents. The show also pivots to national politics, the state of the economy, “woke” moments in sports reporting, and ends with lighter banter about snowstorms, vacations, and fan mail.

Key Discussion Points

1. The “Detained” Hoax: ICE, Media, and Political Spin

• [00:00-06:34]

  • The show opens with reports claiming ICE agents kidnapped a five-year-old boy and used him as bait, debunked by DHS, which says the boy’s father ran, abandoning him during arrest.
  • Panelists share incredulity over the “bait” narrative and criticize how media and politicians, including VP Kamala Harris, have latched onto the story.
  • Quote [01:39] Martha MacCallum:
    “Here come a bunch of scary looking guys in masks with guns and they're taking this little boy. I mean it's just, it's over the top. It's like outrageous.”

• Paul Morrow and Jesse Watters stress that the child’s welfare was maintained and call media reporting irresponsible, linking it to larger trends of ‘hoaxes’ and misinformation.

  • Quote [03:07] Paul Morrow:
    “That five year old remains with his family. Well, what about the angel moms?... We will continue unabated in our mission to ensure there are no more Rachel Morins separated from her five children.”

• Tyrus delivers a personal fatherhood perspective.

  • Quote [12:41] Tyrus:
    “There is not any situation in my lifetime whether I was convicted for assault, manslaughter, whatever... to where I would run and abandon my child.”

2. Contradictory Accounts and Systemic Issues

• [06:34-11:22]
  • Jessica Tarlov introduces conflicting statements from the detained father’s lawyer, detailing the asylum process via the CBP1 app and ongoing court appearances, casting doubt on the official account.
  • Tarlov also highlights reports of problematic ICE behavior and civil rights issues, referencing statements from Minnesota law enforcement officials about profiling and poor detention conditions.
    • Quote [07:39] Jessica Tarlov:
      “If Greg were here, he would say, let's take a step back and look at the bigger picture... All of them have been people of color. There are new court documents out... talking about contained food with mold and worms, not enough water.”
  • Jesse Watters objects, defending the ICE agents and the credibility of the facilities, claiming complaints are fabrications.
    • Quote [10:29] Jesse Watters:
      “These detention centers are amazing. You get dental care, you get free health care.”

3. Broader Immigration and Policy Perspectives

• [11:22-13:23]
  • Tyrus and Paul Morrow call for policy improvements—distinguishing between legal and illegal immigration, and encouraging administration-led positive citizenship events.
    • Quote [05:44] Paul Morrow:
      “What I'd like to see is them do something like as the head of the executive, he can swear in new citizens, do it nationally... You want legal migrants.”

4. National Politics and the Coming Midterms

• [14:42-22:18]

  • The conversation shifts to President Trump’s campaign intentions, with Chief of Staff Suzy Wiles quoted as saying he’ll campaign as if he’s on the ballot.
    • Quote [15:21] Paul Morrow (on midterms):
      “...You take all the three letter agencies... and you throw them at the high crime cities... of course it's going to go down. It's not rocket science.”
  • Jessica Tarlov tempers celebration over reported crime drops, noting the trend began before Trump; highlights negative polling for the administration across various issues despite lower murder rates.
    • Quote [16:19] Jessica Tarlov:
      “The rest of it is a disaster, though.”

• Tyrus and Martha MacCallum discuss voter focus on the economy and the significance of local candidates over national figures in off-year elections.

5. Sports & “Woke” Reporting: Tennis Players and Political Questions

• [23:03-28:38]

  • Segment features a liberal reporter at the Australian Open asking American tennis players loaded political questions about the US climate under Trump.

  • Amanda Anisimova and Taylor Fritz deflect these questions with grace, refusing to be drawn into controversy.

    • Quote [23:40] Jessica Tarlov (as Anisimova):
      “I don't think that's relevant.”
    • Quote [24:00] Paul Morrow (as Fritz):
      “Whatever I say here is going to get put in a headline and it's, it's gonna get taken out of context.”

  • Panelists critique the reporter’s motives and approach, expressing exasperation over politicizing sports events.

6. Lighthearted Topics: Weather, Vacations, Collections

• [28:54-36:08]

  • Snowstorm Preparation: Jokes and practical tips about “Snowmageddon” and whether people over-prepare.

    • Quote [29:41] Martha MacCallum:
      “I'm always amazed when people are, like, running to the grocery store and filling up their carts... you really think you're gonna starve over the next two days?”

  • Skillcations: Banter about vacationing to learn new skills (or not).

    • Quote [32:05] Jesse Watters:
      “I want to come home dumber. It's not like I need to. I mean, I sit next to you, Jessica. It's like taking candy from a baby.”

  • Fan Mail Friday: Panelists answer questions about class reunions, things loaned/collected, favorite albums and bands, and medium readings, mixing humor and personality.

7. Closing “One More Thing”

• [38:11-Episode End]
  • Features quirky news stories (sheepskin hats, deer in a bank, freedom plane with historical US documents, police chased by a chainsaw-wielding assailant), more jokes, and goodbyes.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [01:39] Martha MacCallum: “Here come a bunch of scary looking guys in masks with guns and they're taking this little boy. I mean it's just, it's over the top.”
• [03:07] Paul Morrow: “That five year old remains with his family. Well, what about the angel moms?”
• [12:41] Tyrus: “There is not any situation in my lifetime... to where I would run and abandon my child.”
• [10:29] Jesse Watters: “These detention centers are amazing. You get dental care, you get free health care.”
• [23:40] Jessica Tarlov (as Anisimova): “I don't think that's relevant.”
• [29:41] Martha MacCallum: “I'm always amazed when people are, like, running to the grocery store and filling up their carts...”
• [32:05] Jesse Watters: “I want to come home dumber. It's not like I need to. I mean, I sit next to you, Jessica.”

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 00:00-06:34 – ICE “Detained” Hoax: Breaking down the accusations, DHS response, and media reaction
• 06:34-11:22 – Disputed facts, lawyer’s account vs. DHS, Jessica’s arguments, and systemic complaints
• 11:22-13:23 – Policy alternatives, citizenship ceremonies, and fatherhood in the context of law enforcement
• 14:42-22:18 – Trump post-Davos, midterm strategy, crime rates, and economic outlook
• 23:03-28:38 – Sports, politics, and “woke” journalism: tennis player interviews
• 28:54-36:08 – Snowstorm jokes, vacation learning, and collections
• 38:11-End – Quirky news, fan mail, and wrap-up

Summary Takeaway

This episode centers on the power of media narrative, political spin in high-profile immigration enforcement stories, and the emotional and practical complexities at the US border. The hosts expose and debate the factual discrepancies, the motivations behind different responses, and broader consequences for public debate and policy. The show’s remaining segments provide a mix of political update, cultural commentary, and the friendly, comic banter that defines “The Five.”