“F**k You, Susan”

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Five — “F**k You, Susan”

Date: July 14, 2026
Host/Panel: Martha MacCallum (moderator), Kayleigh McEnany, Jessica Tarlov, Jesse Waters, Jimmy Fala

Episode Overview

This episode of The Five centers on three primary topics: the controversy surrounding an ICE-involved shooting in Maine and the protests targeting Senator Susan Collins, President Trump's new policy on the Strait of Hormuz and its international implications, and the Democratic Party's struggle with the socialist insurgency in the Michigan Senate race. Additional segments include commentary on entertainers' political activism, male overconfidence, and a lighthearted “one more thing” round.

The panel delivers impassioned opinions and spicy banter, reflecting the show's trademark mix of debate, humor, and pointed critique.

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1. ICE Shooting in Maine & Fallout for Susan Collins

[00:35 – 16:02]

Key Discussion Points:

• Incident Summary: ICE officers conducting surveillance on an illegal immigrant encounter a man who flees in a vehicle; an officer shoots, and the event is under investigation.
• Public & Media Reactions: Protests erupt at Susan Collins' office; comparison to police violence and historical atrocities (Warsaw Ghetto/Nazi Germany) surface in the debate.
• Policy Response: ICE pauses most vehicle stops and begins a procedures review.
• Body Cameras Debate: Both sides agree on the need for body camera footage in federal law enforcement operations.
• Susan Collins Under Fire: Her support for additional ICE funding and enforcement could threaten her re-election prospects.
• Bipartisan Frustrations: Both parties accused of politicizing tragedies rather than focusing on pragmatic reforms.

Notable Quotes:

• Jesse Waters [03:09]:
  “These thugs want an excuse to shoot someone. Like they're patrolling the Warsaw ghetto in 1941.”

• Jessica Tarlov [06:52]:
  “There was an opportunity for bipartisan legislation. Republicans decided to go at their own way and pass reconciliation... Susan Collins was a deciding vote on that $70 billion extra for ICE...”

• Kayleigh McEnany [11:08]:
  “So the bullet holes are right through the front windshield. So this wasn't a side shot. The car was coming at the officer, we think, and they'll do a review. And if he's, you know, guilty of something negligent, then he'll face justice. Or if the person drove Adam and he was defending his life, then that's it. I mean, what are we talking about here?”

• Jimmy Fala [14:12]:
  “If you genuinely care... stop using the word Gestapo to describe anybody, because that's making everybody a lot less safe.”

Segment Takeaways:

• Panelists argue intensely over border and deportation policies, the politics around ICE, and media narratives.
• Common ground emerges on the necessity of body cams but little on broader immigration or enforcement reforms.
• The discussion frames Susan Collins as a political flashpoint due to her ICE funding record.

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2. Trump’s Hormuz Blockade & Middle East Policy Moves

[16:25 – 24:41]

Key Discussion Points:

• Trump’s New Policy: The U.S. launches airstrikes on Iran and implements a blockade on Iranian ports, scrapping an earlier plan for a “freedom toll” on the Strait of Hormuz in favor of investment commitments from Gulf allies.
• International Strategy: The U.S. aims to isolate Iran by supporting disarmament of militias in Iraq and securing Gulf investment.
• Panel’s Reaction: Trump’s tactical changes, claimed economic wins, and the nature of the Gulf partnerships are debated.
• Political Framing: The discussion frames the move as both an economic and diplomatic win, with jabs at previous (Biden-era) diplomacy and European reluctance.

Notable Quotes:

• Martha MacCallum [17:47]:
  “In many ways this could be the key to reorganizing the Middle east and isolating Iran even more... They need to solve this problem in a way that isolates Iran.”

• Kayleigh McEnany [19:17]:
  “I would frame it this way, Kayleigh. I would say he proposed the freedom toll and then the Gulf Arab allies said, no, no, no, no, don't do the toll. We'll invest a lot of money in America. That's how I would frame it...”

• Jessica Tarlov [21:55]:
  “It's going all too fast, and it's all too farcical for my simple liberal mind. I cannot believe you are still pretending like this is going okay. Bombs and missiles didn't work. Diplomacy definitely didn't work...”

• Jesse Waters [23:37]:
  “We should all be able to applaud the restraint Trump showed by waiting till pride was over to bomb the gay ayatollah. There were no bombs in June. July is here. Inflation is down. This is a political winner for him…”

Segment Takeaways:

• The panel delivers a consistently hawkish take, hailing Trump's assertiveness while mocking claims about the strategy's economic impact.
• Mockery and sarcasm underline party divides on foreign policy and the interpretation of “wins.”

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3. Democrats Face Off: Michigan’s Cringe Primary

[24:50 – 30:47]

Key Discussion Points:

• Haley Stevens vs. Abdul Al Said: The Michigan Democratic Senate primary sees establishment moderate Stevens opposing democratic socialist Al Said.
• Stevens’ Viral “Cringe” Speech: Panel lampoons her energy and compares it to a mundane HR session.
• Socialist Town Hall Clip: The social justice and Medicare-for-All agenda is ridiculed by conservative panelists.
• Party Civil War: The split between progressives and “Karen” (establishment) Democrats is highlighted as a strategic risk for 2026.

Notable Quotes:

• Jesse Waters [26:01]:
  “And a little bit of helium out of a balloon. And yet, sadly, the world's most aggressive life coach might not be enough to stave off the revolution.”

• Kayleigh McEnany [27:02]:
  “So right now, it's the commie versus Karen. And you got this guy. What's his name? Abdul. Abdul wants to be senator. He says he wants to be the first Muslim senator. I always thought that was Barack Obama, but he says he's Christian and I'm going to take him at his word.”

• Jessica Tarlov [28:30]:
  “I would never have to control when we get pregnant our entire lives or sexually active lives anyway.”

Segment Takeaways:

• Humor devolves into off-topic jokes about vasectomies, but the underlying point is anxiety over Democratic messaging and direction as party infighting heats up.
• The possibility that progressives could win primaries even if they struggle in general elections is highlighted, with concern about the national implications for Democrats.

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4. Entertainment & Activism: Mick Jagger’s Advice

[31:20 – 34:38]

Key Discussion Points:

• Mick Jagger vs. Bruce Springsteen: Jagger says entertainers shouldn’t lecture their crowds; Springsteen and others are criticized for politicizing their shows.
• Loss of Common Culture: The panel laments the shift of late-night TV and concerts into venues for political speech.

Notable Quotes:

• Mick Jagger (clip) [31:30]:
  “My job in the live music world is just those people that come is to have the best time they possibly can and for two hours or whatever it is to forget all their problems. And you don't want to lecture them.”

• Jesse Waters [31:55]:
  “When every entertainer became an activist, everything went downhill. Nothing is better since we lost common culture.”

• Jessica Tarlov [34:16]:
  “He is fabulous at it. I saw the Rolling Stones in Hyde Park, which is probably the coolest concert that I've been to...”

Segment Takeaways:

• The panel expresses nostalgia for “apolitical” entertainment and unity through sports, music, and comedy.
• Guests agree that escapism is a rare commodity in today’s cultural environment.

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5. Male Ego & Penalty Kicks

[35:02 – 36:58]

Key Discussion Points:

• Viral Statistic: 24% of men say they could score a World Cup penalty kick; the panel discusses male overconfidence.
• Comparison to Other Polls: Reference to high numbers of men claiming they could defeat a bear in a fight.

Notable Quotes:

• Jessica Tarlov [35:02]:
  “The male ego, especially Jesse's, never ceases to amaze me. See this penalty kick today from Spain's win over France in the World Cup?”

• Jesse Waters [35:41]:
  “I thought the numbers sounded low because a lot of guys have such a higher sense of self, especially when they're getting surveyed about stuff, because it's a lot like dating...”

• Martha MacCallum [36:08]:
  “These are all things that you will actually never have to prove. So you might as well. Yes, I can absolutely get a bear here right now.”

Segment Takeaways:

• The conversation is lighthearted, focusing on playful gender stereotypes and humility in the face of outlandish polling data.

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6. “One More Thing” – Lightning Round

[37:43 – 41:11]

Segment Highlights:

• Kayleigh McEnany: All-Star Game promo.
• Jesse Waters: (Clip) Sidewalk interviews; stand-up comedy tour plug.
• Jessica Tarlov: Cute ducklings block Copenhagen traffic.
• Martha MacCallum: The British royal tradition of counting swans.
• Jimmy Fala: Cow Appreciation Day; anecdote about cows and weirdness.
• Panel Banter: Odd coincidences with AI photos appearing in Airbnbs and a joke about vasectomy certificates.

Notable Quotes:

• Jimmy Fala [39:19]:
  “You know, I love cows. Cows are the best animal. I don't like animals, really, but I do like cows. I wanted to be a cow, and I grew up and look at these cute little cows.”

• Jesse Waters [39:45]:
  “I'm not gonna knock it because in college, I hooked up with several cows at nickel beer night. It's a long season. Nobody goes undefeated.”

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Memorable Moments

• Gestapo/Nazi comparisons ([03:09] / [03:16]): Waters and Tarlov spar over extreme rhetoric surrounding ICE.
• Bipartisan body cam support ([06:52]): A rare moment of agreement.
• Jokes about vasectomies ([28:30] et seq.): The Michigan segment derails into innuendo and banter.
• Mick Jagger on apolitical concerts ([31:30]–[31:50]): Unified praise for the “just entertain us” message.
• Jesse’s stand-up comedy tour ([39:45]): Self-deprecating humor about comedy and cows.

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Conclusion

This episode of The Five delivers energetic debate on pressing news: the political firestorm over an ICE shooting, the evolving U.S. strategy in the Middle East under Trump, the Democrats’ internal struggle against rising socialist voices, and the culture wars in American entertainment. The spectacle is leavened by frequent quips, running jokes, and personal anecdotes, sustaining both audience engagement and the show’s signature blend of news and humor.

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For listeners seeking:

• Fierce cross-party debate on immigration and policing policy, see [00:35 – 16:02].
• Analysis and mockery of Trump’s latest foreign policy moves, see [16:25 – 24:41].
• A look inside the Democratic civil war in Michigan, see [24:50 – 30:47].
• Cultural commentary and laughs, don’t miss the segments starting at [31:20].

Transcript

[Jessica Tarlov]

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[Martha MacCallum]

Hello everybody. We are just getting started here this evening. Great to be with you. I'm Martha McCallum along with Kayleigh McEnany, Jessica Tarlov, Jesse Waters and Jimmy Fala. It's five o' clock in New York City and this is the five. Timbers flaring for the second day in Maine after protesters stormed Senator Susan Collins office furious over a deadly ICE related shooting. DHS officials say that the agents were conducting surveillance at the home of an illegal immigrant who had a final order for removal when another man got into a car and left the residence. Now the agency says this, quote, ICE law enforcement attempted to conduct a vehicle stop the vehicle attempted to flee the scene and fearing for public safety, an officer discharged his weapon. A new photo showing bullet holes in front of the windshield of this vehicle as the incident remains under investigation. Those are the operative words here. But that is not stopping. Some people over at Morning Joe for one example, already have jumped to the final investigation even though they're not part of the investigation. Watch this.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I don't live in Maine.

[Jesse Waters]

I'm not an immigrant.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

But I'm a proud American.

[Jesse Waters]

And this administration has made every single

[Kayleigh McEnany]

American complicit in these deaths. The hardliners in this administration, they don't

[Jesse Waters]

care about the politics because many of

[Kayleigh McEnany]

them are white supremacists and they don't care.

[Jesse Waters]

They're cruel and this is what they want.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

They are turning hometowns in America into kill zones. They're turning neighborhood streets into kill zones.

[Martha MacCallum]

All right, that was Joe Scarborough there at the end. The incident has led to a policy shift. Sources telling Fox that ICE agents have been instructed to pause most vehicle stops in most situations as they reevaluate procedures. Investigators are gathering all the facts here. Some Democrats cannot resist the pouring gasoline on what is already a difficult situation.

[Jessica Tarlov]

I said this a couple of weeks

[Jimmy Fala]

ago that the, that I would not be surprised if when ICE funding started up again that we would start to see more civilian deaths at the hands of ice. And that's exactly what has happened.

[Jesse Waters]

These thugs want an excuse to shoot someone. Like they're patrolling the Warsaw ghetto in 1941. That's.

[Jessica Tarlov]

I just can't help but think about Nazi Germany.

[Martha MacCallum]

So if you are chased recklessly by

[Jessica Tarlov]

an unmarked vehicle, what would you do as an American citizen?

[Martha MacCallum]

And I would probably run myself. Well, the first piece of advice I would have in that situation is in any situation where you're approached by law enforcement, the best practice is to always cooperate. If you have a positive story to tell, you're here legally, then that's where that gets resolved. Sadly for this individual, he decided to jump into a car and try to flee the scene. And the investigation, as we said, is ongoing, which is why it's so troubling that so many people have already hit fast forward on it and decided exactly what happened. However, Kaylee, let me start with you. Mark Wayne Mullen, when he took over at dhs, he was asked what some of his goals were. And one of the things that he said was no headlines. He didn't want any headlines because the President said after many, after Minnesota, that he didn't like the video that he saw. So where are we now?

[Jimmy Fala]

I think this fact pattern is troubling. No doubt about it. You know some of the facts that we have. The New York Times said that there was an officer, according to a witness, who said, he tried to run over me. So that is something that was heard from one of the officers. The main Attorney General's office said the suspect attempted to flee in the vehicle in the direction of the officer. If that's true, that's troubling, that's a problem. But the ICE spokesperson, notably when the statement was put out yesterday, said the vehicle attempted to flee the scene and fearing for public safety, an officer discharged his weapon. Nowhere in there does it say that the vehicle was heading towards the officer. There's a lot we don't know. We know that the law is such that an officer can use force if they reasonably, reasonably perceive an imminent threat of death or great bodily harm to themselves or someone else. But the reason we don't have the answer to this, there was no body cam footage. There's no body cam footage here. There was no body cam footage in Houston, Texas. And ICE put out a statement after the Houston, Texas, deadly interaction and said, well, the government shutdown delayed this. At this point, that's not an excuse. There needs to be body camera footage. The President should make this a priority. Democrats Republicans together need to make this a priority because we need to see what happens in these interactions. I would say this Lance Schroyer is the person who is currently nominated to be director of ice. I think it's encouraging that he comes from a law enforcement background. A lot of times the ice cream director is someone who comes from lower tiers of the agency. This is someone with law enforcement background. He was a state trooper. I was reading what others have said about him. They say he's an operator. He's familiar with tactical stuff. That is what we need. Another person said he knows how to keep people highly trained, prepared and professional. Because I do know this ICE has an important job. As Susan Collins said, just look at the loss of Lake and Riley. Look at the loss of Sheridan Gorman. Look at the people who are dying at the hands of big operator trucks, some of those illegal immigrants. ICE has an important job. Abolish ICE is reckless to say, but there clearly needs to be some reform here. We have two very troubling fact patterns.

[Martha MacCallum]

Yeah, you know, I think about Lake and Riley and Sheridan Gorman, and I don't remember outrage from Joe Scarborough during those moments about why this individual would even be allowed to be in this country in order to end that young woman's life, those young women's lives. So, Jessica, you know your reaction to sort of the, the jumping on the bandwagon here and what we heard from some of those politicians about Nazi tactics and all of these things. You know, how. Where is the sort of prevailing wisdom of let's just wait, let's have an investigation, let's see what actually happened here?

[Jessica Tarlov]

Well, DHS Secretary Mullen and Tom Homan agreed that there needed to be immediate change, which is why they paused these vehicle stops. So this is obviously an extreme enough fact pattern, as Kelly said, or sets of scenarios that something needed to be done right now. And I don't think that you see the appropriate reaction to when an American citizen is killed by someone who is here illegally, especially when they have a rap sheet like in the Sheridan Gorman case of Blake and Riley case. And I call that out when it happens. But we did see, like in Texas, the protesting outside when officers were attacked, that people did say, Democrats said, excuse me, you can't do that. Those are people are doing their jobs and you should not put them in any danger. That is not the case here. And when the right jumps on Democrats for saying ICE agents are rogue or acting rogue or just untrained, I don't see how you can watch footage of this, which we're only getting because of bystanders because they don't have the body cam cams on which the money was appropriated for. There's $20 million that was supposed to go to body cams. And that certainly would have made Houston a lot clearer. And what's going on in Maine. So your best case is that they're rogue and bloodthirsty. Worst case, that they're untrained. Both totally unacceptable. This is a redux of what happened in Minneapolis this time, not Americans. One person. The main victim, Guerrero, had work status and illegal in Houston. I thought we were past this, and I hoped that we were past this. And Tom Holman, who was just on in the last hour with Griff Jenkins, saying, I want to be clear, this doesn't mean the mass deportations are going to stop. And I understand there's a right flank that wants that badly and that Stephen Miller is still, you know, patting around saying, I want 3,000 a day. But it's very clear that they are going about this in absolutely the wrong way. And people are going to flood the streets. That you have people who are not even the targets of the investigations, who are now no longer with us. You know, people who won with work status or one who had been here for 30 years with American children. No rap sheet, no nothing is disgraceful. Very few things can be agreed upon across the aisle these days, and body cams was one of them. There was an opportunity for bipartisan legislation. Republicans decided to go at their own way and pass reconciliation without. And Susan Collins was a deciding vote on that $70 billion extra for ICE, even though they had gotten more money than the IDF spends through 2029. She said, yeah, you deserve more money for enforcement. And that is going to come home to roost for her. She is going to be in a tough reelection fight and people are going to be saying, you said you would protect Maine. Remember when Trump wanted to send agents there? And then she said, don't do it. I want to add that there's this report by the Police Executive Research Forum commissioned by CBP 13 years ago, and it found that, quote, it is, it is suspected that in many vehicle shooting cases, the subject driver was attempting to flee from the agents who intentionally put themselves in the exit path of the vehicle, thereby exposing themselves to additional risk and creating justification for the use of deadly force. We saw this with Renee Good and her shooting by Officer Ross. And in these two instances, if in any way, that is the practice of cbp, where they, those agents think, I just got to Throw myself in front of that car or get in the way so that it looks like my life was in danger. And Kelly pointed out that the bullet holes do not seem like they were in danger from it. And that is not what is being

[Jimmy Fala]

reported, though, that people are intentionally putting their bodies.

[Jessica Tarlov]

I'm saying that there was such like

[Jimmy Fala]

they're just throwing their bodies in front of cars.

[Jessica Tarlov]

But to make someone. If that happens, it's in this report that if you know that you need to say I was being. I was a victim, I was acting in self defense.

[Martha MacCallum]

You know what they want and you know what the people in the car want. Everybody wants to go home that night. That's what they want. They don't want to shoot someone and have a good excuse by standing in front of the car. But we wouldn't have this problem, Jesse, if there weren't, you know, 12 million people, that's a conservative estimate, who flooded into the country over four years that have created a very enormous issue for law enforcement who is trying to get criminals and people who have orders to be ejected out of the country.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

All right, so the bullet holes are right through the front windshield. So this wasn't a side shot. The car was coming at the officer, we think, and they'll do a review. And if he's, you know, guilty of something negligent, then he'll face justice. Or if the person drove Adam and he was defending his life, then that's it. I mean, what are we talking about here? The guy's trying to make an arrest and this guy's driving all around like crazy. What is he doing? It's pretty stupid. Why is he here anyway? Shouldn't be here.

[Jessica Tarlov]

He's working.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

He shouldn't be here. Jessica, you can't be. Listen, he wasn't even the subject of this operation. They were going after another guy. And so if they say pull over, pull over, he's coming out of a place that was recognized as housing and illegal alien. Now this investigation will be over. But we have to grow up. Can we grow up? I mean, there's going to be fatalities in law enforcement situations, especially when there's foreign fugitives that who are resisting and running away. I'd say Trump's almost batting a thousand if you calculate this. Biden, I think. What was he. He let everybody into the country and then deported no one. So Biden didn't even get up to the plate. Biden didn't even try. Biden and the Democrats chose to let millions of migrants in here, and then they chose not to deport them. And then the American people were like, yeah, we're going to put Trump in so he can get him out. And we're getting him out. And then they say, oh, you know, well, we only have to get out the criminals. So that position. And you've said it, and everyone around this table's heard you, Jessica, you've said they should be able to break into the country and stay until they break a law and then they can get deported. Then we don't have a border. That's just an invitation for Latin America to break into the country and we have to wait for them to commit crimes. That's not a policy, that's insanity. And then when they do get caught committing crimes, we can't get them because the sanctuary states protect them. So they say they want to get the criminals out. And then when we try to get the criminals out, they protect them. And even the bad hombres. How about the child rapist illegal in Minnesota got pardoned by tampon? I mean, what the hell? So he wouldn't get deported. So they don't believe in borders. They don't believe we can get the people out to commit the crimes. And they actually want to abolish the agency that's doing the work. So we can't work with these people. We can't work with these people. And we know why they're doing it. We used to win landslide elections in this country. Remember Nixon, remember Reagan? 49 out of the 50 states. Why all of a sudden we bring in all this foreign born population. Democrats are all of a sudden competitive. They didn't change how persuasive they were. They just imported everybody that lived outside of the country into the country, and now it's closer. That's why they want him here, no matter if they commit crimes or not.

[Jesse Waters]

I'm just gonna jump in with a quick psa. Nobody wants driving advice from a guy with my taxi history. But don't flee law enforcement in your car. That's one. Two is if you genuinely care, because we've heard a lot of heartfelt reaction to this. Stop using the word Gestapo to describe anybody, because that's making everybody a lot less safe. Obviously, the tensions are already high. If there's somebody dumb enough to buy into this parallel between Warsaw, Poland, as Seth Moulton trotted out, and what ICE is doing in legitimately enforcing the law. Okay? And that's the old adage they say in the courtroom, if you have the facts, pound the facts. If you have nothing, pound the table. They're pounding the table on ice. We might not like this outcome, but the table was set, as he said, by the previous party. And this is never going to be a pretty thing, but it only gets worse when you try to game it politically because there's a political desperation in Maine. They thought that Senate seat was lost because of Graham Platner, and nobody wants to speak to that reality that they think this might be a movement. People are riled up. Now we got the anti ice angle. We might not have a candidate yet because we're not letting voters pretend to be a part of the primary. But maybe whoever we get has the wind at their back because we're mad about this guy. And that's what I think we're watching here. And that's the saddest part.

[Martha MacCallum]

Yeah. I mean, I think about Sheridan Gorman's mom's testimony the other day, saying, you know, you're telling me that you care more about this person who came into the country illegally, and I'm talking about the person they were looking for in the House than my daughter.

[Jesse Waters]

Yep.

[Martha MacCallum]

So please tell me why. Please tell me why.

[Jesse Waters]

Sick.

[Martha MacCallum]

She was very compelling, and it's a heartbreaking story. All right, guys. So coming up next, America's Guardian of the street means business. And there's a picture of what business looks like. Trump's blockade on Iranian ports is now back in effect.

[Jesse Waters]

Cheers to America's 250th birthday. Get 20% off your first purchase at foxnewswineshop.com with code FNRADIO20. 20% discount excludes wine club offers and cannot be combined with any other promotion. Expires July 31, 2026. Must be 21 or older to order. Please drink responsibly.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Excuse me.

[Jessica Tarlov]

You look like you love me. You look like you.

[Jimmy Fala]

President Trump making good on his promise to become the guardian of the Strait. The US Launching a fourth wave of airstrikes on Iran just before starting a new Hormuz blockade on the country's ports, which is now officially in effect. Earlier, President Trump abandoning his original plan to charge a 20% toll on shipping through the Strait of Hormuz. And instead, the president says America will be compensated through massive new trade and investment commitments from Gulf allies. Here's how he explained the strategy.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Saudi Arabia, uae, Qatar, Bahrain and Kuwait, you know, primarily, and then others, they, I spoke to all of them and they would love to invest more money in the United States at record amounts, and that would be very acceptable. And this way, there's no fee. I don't like the concept of a fee, but at the same time, it's not fair that we're protecting this strait for the entire world, for China and everyone.

[Jimmy Fala]

You know, Martha, I was fascinated by this today because I was in 2020 in the room with the Iraqi delegation and the president, and it was one of the times I saw the president be most harsh in trying to push the Iraqis to distance themselves from Iran. And today it's a much different relationship. You see the Iraqi prime minister, very friendly with the president, talking about disarming militia, clearly had a great relationship. President Trump invited him to lunch and then had a lot of news out of that.

[Martha MacCallum]

Yeah, I mean, I think in many ways this could be the key to reorganizing the Middle east and isolating Iran even more. And I think that the model that they worked on today of disarming these Iranian militias within Iraq could, you know, that's something that you can then use as leverage. Okay. To the Saudis, we realize that the Houthis are a tall opponent to. To deal with. They've been dealing with them in Yemen for a long time. But, like, they need to quash these Iranian proxies all over. I mean, Israel would love to go finish off the Hezbollah job. And if the, if the Iraqis are willing to get rid of the Iranian militias and the Saudis work on the Houthis and you start to really tamp down, what are these tentacles of Iran? You know, it really is amazing that they, you know, they're like, like trying to eliminate a. Something that keeps growing back like weeds all over the Middle east. And they need to solve this problem in a way that isolates Iran. And I think that's a big. Just one thought on the issue of the charging people to go through this strait. I think President Trump is still really, really angry at Europe for not stepping in. Because if you flooded that strait with European ships, they don't have a lot of them and our ships and all of the allies and said, look, this is an open, free passageway. But they needed a large presence in order to do that. So he's like, you guys are the ones who get oil through here anyway. And so why don't you pay extra to come through here if we're going to be the guardians of this trade and protect it?

[Jimmy Fala]

Yeah. And now he'll be getting trade deals out of this.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Jesse, I don't like the way we say he abandoned the freedom toll. I would frame it this way, Kayleigh. I would say he proposed the freedom toll and then the Gulf Arab allies said, no, no, no, no, no, don't do the toll. We'll invest a lot of money in America. That's how I would frame it, but I didn't write the intro, nor did I. So let's go back to three years ago. Take a little trip down memory lane. All right? Iran had a nuclear program. Iran had a military. Iran had proxies that were taking hostages and killing people. Iran had an ayatollah who was straight, and we were giving them money. Now they have no nuclear program. It's buried. They have no military. The ITIL is gay, not that there's anything wrong with that. And their proxies are crippled. And inflation is lower than it was three years ago. Same with gas prices, same with oil prices. So you look at that and you say, also now we're the new opec. And also all of these Gulf Arab nations are building pipelines to circumvent the strait. So in two and a half years, Iran's not going to have leverage over anything. And the only reason they're playing this game is they have no cards left to play. We decapitated them so brutally that the military faction is trying to keep this thing going because a peace deal, they lose the grip on power. And the guys that signed this memorandum of understanding, they didn't have the clout to enforce it. So we're creating a little civil war inside the country. And we may, maybe might have to do some more decapitation strikes and knock off another layer, because now this is a new dynamic. You have a blockade, oil sanctions and airstrikes never happened before. We always had the blockade and the peace deal. Now we have blockade plus airstrikes. There is no way Iran's coming back from that.

[Jimmy Fala]

I think that's a great analysis. And I like the inflation. My favorite. Yes, I thought it was great. My favorite line today was sleepy. Joe was so sleepy, but he knew how to increase inflation.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Said, hilarious. Laugh riot. I, I like in Jesse's scenario, says, you know what happened? As if, you know. But the Gulf allies called up and they said, no toll. No toll. What about Marco Rubio called up and said, could you run the clip of me a month ago where I said, no tolls can exist on international waterways. That's, that's the way this works. And the investment will come. What does it add to the 17 trillion that he says that we've already gotten or whatever number he comes up with?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I think we're on the trillion.

[Jimmy Fala]

19 trillion, 21 left.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

It's hard to Keep up with.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Yes. It's going all too fast, and it's all too farcical for my simple liberal mind. I cannot believe you are still pretending like this is going okay. Bombs and missiles didn't work. Diplomacy definitely didn't work. That MoU, which everybody in their right mind, so not you. Jesse said, you know, this doesn't seem like a good idea. We're giving them a lot within what, a few days? We had to yank back the waivers for the oil.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

What do we.

[Jessica Tarlov]

There are.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

So we didn't give any money.

[Jessica Tarlov]

You let them start shipping out, making money.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You gave them oil prices fell to 70 bucks.

[Jessica Tarlov]

You know what's really interesting? So that inflation report was good. I said, oh, my God, the biggest drop since 4-20-20. Right. So 4.2% down to 3.5. Okay. You know, I'm preparing for the five. I want to make sure. I want America to succeed. I want us to not pay too much. But I'm also wondering, like, what's the hedge, this huge drop? What. What's the difference maker? Oh, we have the fake promise of a diplomatic solution to this. Well, what does Trump do? It's like, oh, there's good inflation report. Maybe I should do the thing that jacks up inflation right away. I should declare war again. But this time I'm going to, quote, unquote, ask Congress. Maybe they'll do a war powers vote again. Maybe then I'll just have to say I actually respect Article 1 for the first time ever. And they did it right. This is on Congress now. You know, I can't do anything because I have such respect for the Constitution. That's my scenario.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

It was hard to follow. With all due respect, it was almost funny. But then it got hard to follow.

[Jesse Waters]

Can you give us. Can you at least applaud Trump?

[Jessica Tarlov]

The Constitution that threw you off?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

No, it was the fact that Trump wanted to create inflation. I didn't.

[Jessica Tarlov]

This jacks up prices if you go

[Kayleigh McEnany]

back lower than what it was under Biden.

[Jesse Waters]

Yes. Let's have a bipartisan moment. We should all be able to applaud the restraint Trump showed by waiting till pride was over to bomb the gay ayatollah. There were no bombs in June. July is here. Inflation is down. This is a political winner for him in the sense that people want this to end and they feel like we have the cards. I'm not trying to flex here, but when I was in the Oval Office, which, again, I didn't think I was gonna get in. I was just there to get my Cocaine out of the lockers. But when I was there and we were talking, it's the one thing he said about the media. He goes, you believe these people say, I'm losing this war. And I said, Mr. President, if that's true, someone should wake up the Ayatollah and tell him we're up 58 nothing. You may not like the way this is playing out in terms of there's a toll. There's no toll. I can't believe it's not toll. But how much of that might just be negotiating because as we said, the went out and the toll came back down in the name of investment. I don't know if it was a Rubio phone call. You don't know if it was a Rubio phone call. We just know there's no toll, which is good. And the ayatollah did not get bombed

[Jessica Tarlov]

toll before we did any of this. And maybe they should have game planned out for them taking over the strait.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Yeah, you're a military strategist, Jessica.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Why don't you tell the Department of

[Kayleigh McEnany]

War how to win?

[Jimmy Fala]

I never get tired of winning, Jessica. I think that's what you're trying to say. All right, all right. Coming up, the Democratic establishment has a plan to stop the socialists. It's just very cringy.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You had to a little bit of

[Jessica Tarlov]

enthusiasm, a little bit of energy, and a little bit of sick it to them because that's the Michigan way.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Here she comes and then she's gone again.

[Jesse Waters]

I got the rocking pneumonia. I need a shot of rhythm and blues. Chuck Berry, the gestating parent of rock and roll. Can a dose of pure cringe save the Democratic Party from socialism? Michigan Democrat Senate candidate Haley Stevens is the establishment's favorite, running against far left wackadoodle and phony physician Abdul Al Said. But if this viral campaign speech is any indication, she's bringing the energy of a mandatory HR training session. Check this out.

[Martha MacCallum]

I am going to be working on our behalf.

[Jimmy Fala]

I am going to be telling the

[Martha MacCallum]

stories on our behalf.

[Jessica Tarlov]

And you better believe I am going to be doing it with a little

[Martha MacCallum]

bit of joy, a little bit of

[Jessica Tarlov]

enthusiasm, a little bit of energy, and a little bit of stick it to them, because that is the Michigan way

[Jesse Waters]

and a little bit of helium out of a balloon. And yet, sadly, the world's most aggressive life coach might not be enough to stave off the revolution. So last night, the commies all got together for a good old socialist town hall. Watch this. If you want to get money out of politics, put Money in your pocket.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Past Medicare for All. I'm an original co sponsor of Medicare for All with Bernie.

[Martha MacCallum]

We get a Medicare for all if we fight for it.

[Jesse Waters]

It's about taking on a system rigged against working people.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

We're winning because we stand for Medicare for All. We stand against the genocide.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Medicare for All.

[Jimmy Fala]

Affordable housing

[Kayleigh McEnany]

first.

[Jesse Waters]

I want to apologize for all the IQ points the viewers lost by consuming that montage. Jesse, is there any argument more exhausting than the Democrats saying they want to money out of politics? Kamala spent a billion and a half in 100 days. Granted, half of that was her bar tab, but the point is, they always outspend Republicans. Who takes this serious?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I don't know. So right now, it's the commie versus Karen. And you got this guy. What's his name? Abdul.

[Jesse Waters]

Yes.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Abdul wants to be senator. He says he wants to be the first Muslim senator. I always thought that was Barack Obama, but he says he's Christian and I'm going to take him at his word. I looked him up and he says he wants free college. All right? So he wants me to pay for some other parents, kids who can't afford college. All right? I don't want to do that. I can barely afford college for my four children. All right? They better have a scholarship. No oil and gas. He wants no oil and gas. He wants solar panels on my house. It would ruin the look of my house. And he says medicare for All. You know what that means? He wants to take away my doctor and have the government run it. I love Dr. Siegel. Don't you come between me and Siegel. All right? Great relationship. And he's a fake physician. He said he was a physician. He's never seen a single patient. And then I'm like, this guy's dumb. And then I look at her and she scares me more than he does.

[Jesse Waters]

She's a moon bat. Jessica, will you donate to the GoFundMe for Jesse's kids college fund?

[Jessica Tarlov]

I don't think so. And I think Jesse's going to be just fine. If he sticks at 4. If you have any more. I think it's going to be tough.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

No, we're not doing that anymore.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Shop is closed. I know. If you're watching, listen, Haley Stevens is.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I did not get a vasectomy, if that's what you thought.

[Jimmy Fala]

I was wondering.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I did not get a vasectomy. Put that out there. We don't have any more children. We don't have any more children.

[Jimmy Fala]

Manhood.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Take some pressure. I would never have to control when we get pregnant our entire lives or sexually active lives anyway.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Haley, what did you just say?

[Jesse Waters]

I don't know.

[Jessica Tarlov]

That getting a vasectomy doesn't make you less of a man.

[Jesse Waters]

You know, as the host of this. As the host of this segment, I had no intention of discussing the poll numbers. But here we are.

[Jessica Tarlov]

But here we are.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Did you get a vasectomy?

[Jessica Tarlov]

No.

[Jesse Waters]

Okay, see what's even happening here. All right, Kaylee, let me jump in really quick. Did the Democrats not know you had time? You took it to God knows where.

[Jessica Tarlov]

He took it there.

[Jimmy Fala]

You could have talked to Jesse.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You brought my wife into this.

[Jimmy Fala]

But instead you talked about Jesse's man part.

[Jesse Waters]

Obama tried to take away his physician, tried to assign him a new doctor.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Stevens has flipped a district red to blue.

[Jimmy Fala]

That's the only point you had, okay.

[Jessica Tarlov]

That she's. Well, there's an afflictability point.

[Jimmy Fala]

Okay, I know where. I know we're. My points are not about vasectomies or Jesse's personal life and what happens behind closed doors. But they are about your socialists that you have to deal with. They were not radical enough, so they put out a proposal this week. Fox has the document. They want to eliminate the Senate, literally. Eliminate Article 1. Goodbye, see you later. Eliminate the Supreme Court. Article 3. Goodbye, see you later. They want to defund the Department of War and immigrants. All of them have amnesty. Like you guys are dealing with absolute radical, crazy maniacs.

[Martha MacCallum]

Yes.

[Jimmy Fala]

And your party needs to call it out because it's just John Fetterman and 13 House Democrats. That's it.

[Jesse Waters]

Well, that's what I was going to ask you, Martha, really quick, to the Democrats. I know they were late releasing that autopsy. Do they not know Trump won Michigan by a lot? Okay. His policies are popular. There's.

[Martha MacCallum]

You know what? I would not be surprised at all. I wouldn't be surprised at all if this guy wins the primary. I wouldn't be surprised because he has the energy, the primary and the youth.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Exactly.

[Martha MacCallum]

And this woman is not selling what she's selling. But I'll just say one. Even the most. You know, it used to be Medicare for all was sort of like the most tepid version of socialism, but even that. Okay, I spoke to a friend the other day who said that her mother needed surgery in Europe in a socialist medical environment. And they said that we're gonna call you. Well, we'll call you. And you have to be there in two days. So don't make any plans in your life, because when your day comes in this national medical System. We'll get a call and you gotta be there on Tuesday.

[Jesse Waters]

Well, you know what? It's a good thing Jesse already got the vasectomy.

[Martha MacCallum]

There you go. Jesse's like, I'm gonna be off tomorrow, actually. Coming up.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Cover vasectomies.

[Jesse Waters]

Moving on. Rock and Rolls. Geriatric stallion. Mick Jagger can't get no satisfaction with left hefty lectures at concerts.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You can't always get what you preach. Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger telling TDS crooners like Bruce Springsteen that the concert isn't your beast of burden.

[Jesse Waters]

Watch, my job in the live music world is just those people that come is to have the best time they possibly can and for two hours or whatever it is to forget all their problems. And you don't want to lecture them.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You don't want to lecture them. So that's a little bit of a different take.

[Martha MacCallum]

Yes.

[Jesse Waters]

And number one, first of all, let's applaud the fact that he looks great. They are still touring, although Brown Sugar is now Brown Splenda. They're a little older, but he is spot on. Bravo to Mick Jagger because this is the one thing nobody ever talks about. When every entertainer became an activist, everything went downhill. Nothing is better since we lost common culture. Common culture, sports, music, comedy. Places where we would go to put our political differences aside. What he understands that Bruce Springsteen doesn't is one. He's immortal. He'll be relevant forever. Bruce Springsteen is kind of dabbling in late stage activism now because it's the only way he can game the system to be relevant. Okay? Mick Jagger doesn't need that, number one. But more importantly, they've lasted. That band's been together since, I believe they played the Lincoln Inauguration in 1861. They've been around a while, okay, but they understand. A rock concert, of all places, is a party. Think of a. People are going to detach from the rigors and torments of everyday life. You never want to be at a party halfway through the band's rock and people are singing Any Satisfaction. And you're like, by the way, you're trying to get dissatisfaction on stolen land. And you're like, wait, what? And speed up the dance because climate change is going to kill us all. And the fascists are here and you're like, wow, this. This party kind of sucks. I'm going to get out of here.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Have you been a Stone's concert?

[Martha MacCallum]

Yeah. Yeah. No, he's exactly right. And he is preaching what we hear from Jerry Seinfeld and other people. This is what happened to Late night tv. It became totally for one side of the country and not the other. And that's what Springsteen has done. I mean, I grew up in New Jersey, and we all went to Springsteen concerts for years and years. But, like, who. Who want. Who wants the buzzkill? And I don't care what your politics are. You are there to have a good time. So thank you. Mick Jagger, who gets it now? He's always gotten it. He's. He said, I'm an entertainer. Like, thank you. That's exactly. And you're. And you're fabulous at it, Jessica.

[Jessica Tarlov]

He is fabulous at it. I saw the Rolling Stones in Hyde park, which is probably the coolest concert that I've been to. I have made this point to some of my Bruce Springsteen loving friends, and they have said that they know what they're getting and that they will just always want to see Bruce. And I get that. I think Chris Christie feels the same way. I mean, he also feels the same way about Trump. Bruce doesn't see him in general. I don't. But he does have a platform, and people, you know, need to use their platforms for what matters to them.

[Jimmy Fala]

I went to a George Strait, Chris Stapleton concert, and a few rows ahead was a lady in a teachers union shirt. I'm not the biggest fan of the teachers union, but it struck me. I know you are, Jessica. You love our teachers unions that, like.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Well, I love teachers, but a concert

[Jimmy Fala]

isn't about these kind of disagreements. It's about coming together. And I love that. I love that lady rocking out. I was rocking out. Different political persuasion. And here we are.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Here we are. Here we are.

[Jimmy Fala]

Here we are.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Here we are. No vasectomies at this table.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Yeah, that's true. Coming up, peak male confidence takes the pitch.

[Jessica Tarlov]

The male ego, especially Jesse's, never ceases to amaze me. See this penalty kick today from Spain's win over France in the World Cup? 24% of men believe they could score a penalty kick in the World Cup. Jesse, are you part of that 24%?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Listen, if I can kick it hard enough and the goalie's guessing, I mean, it's. He just dives to one side. It's basically a coin flip. If I just kick it hard left or right, it's a 50, 50 shot. So absolutely.

[Jimmy Fala]

I literally have in my notes, Jesse has a 50, 50 shot. Jimmy doesn't have a chance. And then my last one, Brian Kilmeade, would make it, probably.

[Jesse Waters]

I got to be honest.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

He might.

[Jesse Waters]

I thought the numbers sounded low because a Lot of guys have such a higher sense of self, especially when they're getting surveyed about stuff, because it's a lot like dating. Do you know men? Men before sex are like politicians before elections. Anything's possible. And once we get elected, we're like, my fellow Americans, you know, we're not going to talk about this. I would think every guy. I would think it would be like 75 or 80%. I'm not kidding. I wouldn't.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Like, 75% of guys said they could beat a bear in a fight. Yeah, that's the last thing we did.

[Martha MacCallum]

These are all things that you will actually never have to prove. So you might as well. Yes, I can absolutely get a bear here right now.

[Jesse Waters]

Right now.

[Martha MacCallum]

And I definitely make that shot. But here's the problem with your description of how to make that shot. He's reading every move of every muscle on your body to figure out which way you're going. He's not just guessing. 50. 50. Like, okay, I'm going right this time.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I'm reading every move and muscle in his body. How about that, Martha? Not in a gay way.

[Jesse Waters]

Thank you. Listen, I think when you watch Penalty Kicks, they're deceptive because of what he described. There is guess. There is absolutely guessing. Even if you say he's reading your body.

[Martha MacCallum]

Totally.

[Jesse Waters]

It's like hockey. These guys can pump. Fake. Fake body. Fake. Okay, That's. That's the reality. I think most guys after this week can kick a penalty kick. I think none of us can outrun a bison. That's where I am in this news cycle.

[Jimmy Fala]

That guy was impressive.

[Martha MacCallum]

That was the lesson of the week.

[Jessica Tarlov]

I think you can do neither. All right, one more thing's up next.

[Martha MacCallum]

Starting a business can seem like a

[Jimmy Fala]

daunting task unless you have a partner like Shopify.

[Martha MacCallum]

They have the tools you need to

[Jesse Waters]

start and grow your business.

[Jimmy Fala]

From designing a website to marketing to

[Martha MacCallum]

selling and beyond, Shopify can help with everything you need. There's a reason millions of companies like

[Jimmy Fala]

Mattel, Heinz and Allbirds continue to trust and use them.

[Martha MacCallum]

With Shopify on your side, turn your big business idea into sign up for

[Jimmy Fala]

your $1 per month [e-mail] specialoffer.

[Martha MacCallum]

Okay, time now for one more thing. Jess.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

So the All Star Games tonight. It's on Fox and it's in Philly. They gave us this great jacket here, so go check that out. Live coverage tonight on Fox. Here we go. Jesse Waters, primetime Johnny discovered the growing socialist skid row here in Manhattan. That Mandani is just letting Fester Take a sneak peek.

[Jesse Waters]

Are you willing to share what you

[Kayleigh McEnany]

guys do for a living? I hold up TV reporters at gunpoint. Okay. I think he's safe. No one worry.

[Jesse Waters]

Another winning, winning dog, Jessica.

[Jessica Tarlov]

Okay. Chickens may cross the road, but ducks walk in the middle of it. A family of ducks stopped traffic in Copenhagen as they took over a busy street with cars slowly trailing behind. An adult duck with eight little ducklings marched down the middle lane as the police officer protected them.

[Martha MacCallum]

That's like Make Way for Ducklings, the book.

[Jimmy Fala]

Nice.

[Martha MacCallum]

Exactly.

[Jessica Tarlov]

An inspiring story.

[Martha MacCallum]

So it's the royal upping right now. King Charles oversees the counting of the swans. Look how big these things are. Swans are one of my absolute favorite birds, and they mate for life. And they're beautiful. So for the last 800 years, they do this official count. They measure their beaks, they see how many there are, they take good care of them, and then they re release them.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

They measure their beaks?

[Martha MacCallum]

Yeah, they measure their beaks.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

That's invasive.

[Martha MacCallum]

Should we measure yours?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

What does that matter? We don't need to measure.

[Martha MacCallum]

It's pretty long, Kaylee.

[Jimmy Fala]

We just need Greg to narrate the Brit Hume voice with the swan, right?

[Jessica Tarlov]

Sexy swan news.

[Jimmy Fala]

Yeah, exactly. Well, happy Cow Appreciation Day.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

Moo.

[Jimmy Fala]

You know, I love cows. Cows are the best animal. I don't like animals, really, but I do like cows. I wanted to be a cow, and I grew up and look at these cute little cows.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You wanted to be a cow?

[Jessica Tarlov]

I told us I did.

[Jimmy Fala]

Yes.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

I forgot how weird you are.

[Jimmy Fala]

I love cows. I'm a big cow fan. People are dressing up at Chick Fil a in honor of Cow Appreciation Day. If you come dressed as a cow, you get a free something. Free entrees. So you have until 7. Dress up like a cow. Let's honor these big, beautiful animals. Moo.

[Jesse Waters]

I'm not gonna knock it because in college, I hooked up with several cows at nickel beer night. It's a long season. Nobody goes undefeated. Come see me and Jenny and Lincoln fail in California this weekend. I'm doing stand up comedy in Monterey and Napa and then we're on to Anaheim and I put them to work. I put Lincoln on stage to open the show, and people think it's an adorable family moment. It's just cheap labor. I'm like a Nike sweatshop of comedy. But you can get [e-mail] and if I have a minute here, a family who is checking into a San Diego Airbnb saw that they used AI photos and they were of the family checking into the Airbnb. Wait, so she's checking into this Airbnb. She looks at this beach photo and realizes it's a picture of them. They have never stayed at this Airbnb. They don't know the owner. This is the beginning of a bad sci fi movie, by the way, where the owner's gonna eat them. I would get out the difference between her and my wife if we were really staying in an Airbnb. Jenny would never notice that because she would spend seven days checking for bedbugs. She's going to walk in, turn over the mattress, go through the pots. She just has that about her. She's a survivor. Okay.

[Kayleigh McEnany]

One time when I went in to buy a picture frame, the picture that came with the frame was of me and Emma. No.

[Jimmy Fala]

What?

[Jesse Waters]

That's a. That's a no.

[Jessica Tarlov]

He's lying.

[Jesse Waters]

That is the beginning.

[Martha MacCallum]

Buy it and wrap it up and give it to her as a present.

[Jimmy Fala]

That is the beginning of a movie with your vasectomy. So, certificate?

[Kayleigh McEnany]

You don't get a certificate. Not that I would love.

[Jesse Waters]

I love this.

[Martha MacCallum]

All right, that is it for us. Have a great night, everybody. We'll see you back here tomorrow.

[Jesse Waters]

So, Martha, listen to the 5 ad free on Amazon Music with your prime membership, or subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.