Podcast Summary: "Media Goes Wild Over Trump WH Smoking Coke Boats"
The Five | FOX News Podcasts | December 3, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of The Five dives into two media-driven controversies: the so-called "cokeboat hoax" involving a U.S. military strike on a suspected narco-vessel in the Caribbean, and rampant speculation over President Trump's health. Amid heated debate, the five hosts critique the media’s coverage, question the integrity of anonymous sourcing, and examine how accusations of war crimes and health rumors affect public perception and political strategies. An additional segment discusses the political temperature in Tennessee, with broader reflections on voter attitudes and the rise of socialism.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The "Cokeboat Hoax": Media, War Crimes & Political Spin

Segment Start: [01:04]

• The Incident: A US military strike targeted a cartel-operated "cokeboat" in the Caribbean. The Washington Post accuses the administration and Secretary of War Pete Hegseth of war crimes for allegedly ordering a lethal second strike against survivors. The New York Times offers a more nuanced account, reporting that there were no explicit orders to kill survivors.
• Media Critique: The panel eviscerates media reporting, emphasizing inconsistencies in sources and the tendency to build scandals on shaky grounds.
• War Crimes Debate:
  • Jessica points to international law and DoD protocols, stating:
    "That is considered a war crime if the facts as being reported stand." ([03:27])
    • She cites bipartisan criticism, including key Republicans, and contrasts the current case with previous US handling of maritime interdictions.
  • Kayleigh counters by breaking down how different news outlets reported conflicting facts:
    "Buried down in the Washington Post story is the Department of Defense saying that the story is completely false... So it's debunked by five sources at the New York Times. The Washington Post runs with one." ([06:32])
  • Greg offers a cynical take, accusing Democrats of feigning outrage for political expediency, not genuine concern:
    "I do not believe anybody that is shouting right now actually cares about those people. ...They only care about victims when it becomes politically expedient." ([08:11])

Notable Quote:

• Greg Gutfeld ([08:11]): "If you have not developed the hoax instinct after the last 10 years and your reflex is still to say, wow, this sounds really bad, you need a reverse lobotomy."

Further Insights:

• Dana suggests more transparency would help, urging Trump to deliver a direct statement and clearly lay out objectives in the Caribbean:
  "I think the administration would benefit from the President... giving a scripted speech about, what are we doing there?" ([11:51])

2. Media and the "Trump Health Hoax"

Segment Start: [15:20]

• Health Rumors: The media is abuzz with rumors regarding Trump’s stamina and possible undisclosed health issues, despite White House assurances and clean MRI results.
• Perceived Double Standard:
  • Greg highlights the shift in tone from comedians and pundits now scrutinizing Trump, compared to fierce defensiveness over Biden’s health:
    "They're fascinated by Trump's health now... These same jokers were so defensive and offended when Biden's brain was the topic." ([16:58])
• Media Motives: The panel contends that much of the media wants Trump to be unwell, and that ginned-up scandals overshadow substantive issues like the economy.
• Advice for Democrats: Jessica suggests attacks on Trump's cognition are a losing strategy. Instead, she recommends focusing on policy:
  "If you are discussing the substance of the things that he's saying, you can prove your case a lot better..." ([21:36])
• Kayleigh recalls past conspiracy theories and the recycled nature of health panic:
  "I remember being at the podium... they asked me, 'what about this Walter Reed visit from 2019?'" ([23:06])

Notable Quote:

• Greg Gutfeld ([16:58]): "We never had Biden derangement syndrome because his problems were real. ...Their TDS, it's now an addiction."

3. Tennessee Election and Socialist Momentum

Segment Start: [26:01]

• Tennessee’s Congressional Election: Focus on a tight race in a typically red district and the presence of Democratic Socialists.
• What Republicans Should Do:
  • Kayleigh emphasizes the need to “show their work”:
    "Tie it together, a cohesive message. ...Point out the extremity of the left. Lay out your plan for affordability..." ([28:07])
• Younger Voters & Socialism: Discussion about how terms like "socialist" may not have the impact they once did and that affordability is a more pressing issue.
• Jessica on Policy Independence:
  "Voters, no matter their political party, are looking for you to be independently minded..." ([29:29])

4. TDS Tuesday: Rosie O’Donnell and Trump Derangement

Segment Start: [34:04]

• Rosie O’Donnell’s Move to Ireland: The panel reacts to her claim that she fled the US with her daughter due to Trump.
• Greg’s Satirical Suggestion:
  "I have an idea for a new FOX Nation show, Celebrity TDA Rehab..." ([34:43])
• Jesse’s Surprising Sympathy:
  "We shouldn't be doing this segment. ...Even I think this is beneath us and we have covered a lot of things on the show, but I will not participate in something that seems so sad..." ([36:29])
• Jessica on Parental Influence:
  "12 year olds... they're getting their cues from you and things that you're talking about in the house…" ([37:20])

5. Lighter Segments: Raccoons, Alligators, and Viral Oddities

Segment Start: [39:07]

• City Raccoons: Greg jokingly frames the "domestication" of raccoons as a symptom of urban meth use.
• Bizarre Animal News: Includes a Florida alligator wrangled by a former zookeeper-cop and a bear living in a crawlspace.
• Panel Banter: Trivia about animal eyeballs, jokes about trash and raccoon pee, friendly roasting, and personal anecdotes reinforce the show's informal, comedic tone.

Memorable Quotes and Moments

• Greg Gutfeld [08:11]:
  "If you have not developed the hoax instinct after the last 10 years and your reflex is still to say, wow, this sounds really bad, you need a reverse lobotomy."

• Jessica Tarlov [29:29]:
  "Voters, no matter their political party, are looking for you to be independently minded..."

• Kayleigh McEnany [28:07]:
  "Tie it together, a cohesive message. ...Point out the extremity of the left. Lay out your plan for affordability..."

• Greg Gutfeld [34:43]:
  (On his FOX Nation show idea):
  "...you get Rosie, you get Kathy Griffin, Keith Olbermann, George Sakai, Mark Hamill, Stephen King in a luxury house, much like Celebrity Big Brother...then you try to work them through their Trump addiction."

• Jesse Watters [36:29]:
  "Even I think this is beneath us... I will not participate in something that seems so sad and so vulnerable and so tragic."

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Cokeboat Hoax / Media Coverage: [01:04] – [13:15]
• Trump Health Coverage: [15:20] – [24:40]
• Tennessee Election & Socialism: [26:01] – [32:09]
• Rosie O'Donnell / Trump Derangement: [34:04] – [38:32]
• Pet Raccoons & Lighter Segments: [39:07] – [41:12]
• Animal Oddities / One More Thing: [41:55] – End

Tone & Style

• Tone: Spirited, irreverent, combative; lots of playful ribbing amidst serious debate.
• Style: Panelists mix sarcasm, satire, personal anecdotes, and sharp political critiques. Contrarian viewpoints are aired but frequently interrupted or challenged in real-time.

This episode typifies The Five: rapid shift between serious discussion and comic relief, deep skepticism toward mainstream media narratives, and strong opinions on the proper focus for both major parties heading into upcoming elections. The overarching themes are media mistrust, political polarization, and the cyclical nature of scandal in American politics.