Podcast Summary: The Five – Episode from August 29, 2025

Podcast: The Five (FOX News Podcasts)
Date: August 29, 2025
Panel: Sandra Smith (host), Greg Gutfeld, Jessica Tarlov, Joey Jones, Paul Morrow
Format: Roundtable discussion

Overview

In this episode of The Five, the panel dives into several headline-dominating topics, including President Trump’s crackdown on crime and its effects on American cities, the Democratic Party’s internal struggles and optics, criticisms of ICE and law enforcement, and the cultural moment of virtue signaling through actions like land acknowledgements. Later, the traditional lighter segments discuss everyday annoyances, superpowers, and quirky news stories.

The tone ranges from heated debate and sharp humor to mockery and introspection, with frequent interruptions and spirited exchanges.

Main Themes & Key Discussion Points

1. President Trump’s Crime Crackdown and Political Impact

(Starts ~00:34)

• Public Perception of Trump’s Policies:

  • According to a Gallup poll, 0% of Democrats are satisfied with current conditions, while 76% of Republicans approve.
  • Trump’s crackdown on crime, including deploying the National Guard in D.C., receives praise, even from some Democratic-leaning residents.

• Democrats Emulating Trump:

  • Greg Gutfeld: “Trump is making the Democrats sane again ... If you believe no reasonable people can support Trump, then how does that explain the millions of reasonable people who do?” (04:45)
  • Joey Jones and Gutfeld mock Gavin Newsom for adopting “tough on crime” policies resembling Trump’s, with Vice President J.D. Vance calling Newsom a “cheap imitation” of Trump.
    • “He’s trying to be a fake carbon copy of Donald Trump and it just doesn’t work. You can’t mimic the king.” (02:21, Joey Jones)

• Effectiveness of Crime Policies:

  • Data shows crime in D.C. is down during the National Guard deployment—Jessica Tarlov affirms: “You can’t argue with the numbers. It is working. Crime is down.” (06:57)
  • Debate over who influenced whom: Jessica claims Newsom’s approach predates Trump, challenging the narrative that Dems are following the Trump playbook.

• Policy Nuance and Media Framing:

  • Jessica points out the potential for overreach (e.g., national emergencies to continue Guard deployments) and the necessity to balance effective policing with local autonomy.

2. Political Authenticity and Image Crafting

(~05:21)

• Imitation vs. Authenticity in Politics:
  • Politicians copying Trump’s style appear insincere. Joey Jones references Georgia Governor Brian Kemp’s failed attempt to imitate Trump before finding success by being himself.
    • “You can’t try to be something you’re not ... with President Trump, that’s true.” (05:32, Joey Jones)
  • Panel generally agrees that authenticity resonates more with voters than mimicry.

3. Democrat Party Messaging, Virtue Signaling & Internal Criticism

(Segment starting ~14:29)

• Land Acknowledgement Controversy:

  • The DNC began its summer meeting with a “land acknowledgement,” which James Carville blasted as useless virtue signaling.
  • Greg Gutfeld: “The DNC does not exist to right wrongs... It exists – get this through your head – to win elections.” (15:06)
  • Carville’s frustration is both mocked and echoed by the panel; they argue such acts are performative and disconnected from actual policy solutions.

• Party Cohesion and Strategy:

  • Jessica Tarlov admits “no Democrat online or in the real world who is happy with what’s going on at the DNC right now.” (17:50)
  • She notes DNC’s struggles with fundraising and questionable leadership choices, but rebuffs the idea that Republicans have electoral momentum everywhere, citing recent Democrat wins in Iowa.

• Virtue Signaling Critiqued:

  • Gutfeld: “This land acknowledgment thing is the perfect example of the virtue signal. It’s words without deeds that is the Democrat Party. That’s why you guys are in ... shambles.” (20:16)
  • He argues Democrats lean on symbolic gestures instead of substantive action.

4. Attacks on ICE, Security, and Political Rhetoric

(Segment starting ~23:41)

• Rising Hostility Toward Law Enforcement:

  • Clip played of a Democrat lawmaker comparing ICE agents to Nazi SS, with calls for “good trouble” and “uprising.”
  • Numbers cited: DHS has deported nearly 200,000 since January amidst an 830% increase in assaults on ICE agents.

• Panel Pushback:

  • Greg Gutfeld: “I wish the Democrats would create a list of people, places and things that they haven’t compared to Nazis.” (24:37)
  • Sandra Smith emphasizes how dangerous such rhetoric is for agents and their families.
    • “You end up with targets on their backs, not just the backs of the ICE agents... And that’s really scary stuff that’s happening in this country right now.” (25:36, Sandra Smith)
  • Debate over masks: Paul Morrow and Joey Jones defend the need for anonymity due to threats; Jessica Tarlov notes concerns about lack of transparency with plainclothes ICE operations.
  • Reference to precedent: National Guard activism traced back to JFK’s deployment in support of civil rights (27:57, Joey Jones).

5. Lighthearted and Cultural Segments

“The Fastest” & “Fan Mail Friday”

(Segment starting ~31:13, ~34:11)

• How much underwear should you pack for travel?

  • Panel jokes about travel habits, with banter about packing strategies and “first world problems.”
  • Greg Gutfeld: “Fresh underwear [is] like having a handgun in your house. You may not ever need it, but when you need one, you’re glad you have it.” (31:46)

• If you could make one legal thing illegal?

  • Jessica Tarlov: FaceTiming on the street (34:38)
  • Sandra Smith: Clipping nails on public transport (35:38)
  • Joey Jones: Speed limits (35:03)
  • Gutfeld wishes to ban “fake stories” about himself.

• Superpower You’d Want for 24 Hours:

  • Sandra Smith: Cure illnesses (36:22)
  • Jessica Tarlov: Flying (36:42)
  • Joey Jones: Invisibility (37:05)
  • Greg Gutfeld: “The ability to stretch so I can grab things and not be humiliated when I ask my wife….” (37:18)

“One More Thing”

(Segment starting ~38:40)

• Fun News and Human Interest:
  • Greg presents “Sexy Elephant News” featuring zoo elephants; Sandra reveals a sand sculpture in Fox Square; Jessica highlights tryouts for a new women’s professional baseball league; Paul tells a story about Florida python removals; Joey recounts a “Batman pajamas” citizen’s arrest in Florida.

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On Trump’s Crime Policy Impact:
  “Trump is making the Democrats sane again ... They realize if they don’t do this, he’s going to lose ... I’ve never heard of a survey where it’s 0% of anything.” – Greg Gutfeld (04:45)

• On Political Authenticity:
  “You can’t try to be something you’re not ... with President Trump, that’s true.” – Joey Jones (05:32)

• On DNC Virtue Signaling:
  “The DNC does not exist to right wrongs... It exists – get this through your head – to win elections.” – Greg Gutfeld (15:06)

• Critique of Land Acknowledgements:
  “If you’re not going to do anything about it, why even bring it up, you dumbhead?” – Greg Gutfeld (20:16)

• On ICE Agents and Dangerous Rhetoric:
  “When you compare ICE agents to Nazi Germany’s secret police, you end up with targets on their backs ... That’s really scary stuff.” – Sandra Smith (25:36)

• On Packing Underwear:
  “Fresh underwear [is] like having a handgun in your house. You may not ever need it, but when you need one, you’re glad you have it.” – Greg Gutfeld (31:46)

• On Superpowers:
  “I want to help people. And you want something for yourself. Jessica.” – Sandra Smith (36:52, teasing Jessica’s wish to fly)

Additional Insights

• Regular panelist banter maintains a balance of mockery, critique, political insight, and off-topic humor.
• The episode reflects current right-of-center talking points: strong crime measures, skepticism of performative progressive politics, concerns about law enforcement safety, and jibes at Democratic missteps and messaging woes.
• Jessica Tarlov offers persistent counterpoints, defending nuanced Democratic initiatives and stressing the need for effective—and not just tough—public safety policies.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:34 – Trump’s crime crackdown, National Guard in D.C.
• 02:17 – JD Vance, Newsom, and mimicking Trump
• 04:45 – Gutfeld on survey results and polarization
• 06:57 – Jessica Tarlov on crime statistics
• 14:29 – DNC land acknowledgement, Carville critiques
• 17:50 – Jessica on DNC struggles and Democratic turnout
• 20:16 – Gutfeld on land acknowledgment as virtue signaling
• 23:41 – ICE, “Gestapo” rhetoric, law enforcement under fire
• 25:36 – Sandra Smith on dangers of Nazi comparisons
• 31:13 – Underwear packing debate
• 34:38 – “Make something illegal” and other light topics
• 36:22 – What superpower would you choose?
• 38:40 – “One More Thing” (quirky news stories, weather, sports)

This episode encapsulates The Five’s signature blend of partisan debate, humor, critique, and human-interest tidbits, serving listeners a broad sampling of conservative perspectives on the week’s most contentious headlines, with moments of playful levity throughout.