What True Humility Really Looks Like

Thu Jan 16 2025

What does true humility really look like? Some may believe that a humble person must diminish themselves, becoming small or insignificant. But is that truly the essence of humility? Fr. Mike Schmitz offers a deeper perspective on what it means to be truly humble. He explains that humility actually requires both confidence and honesty. When we speak the truth and live authentically in that truth, we embody the heart of true humility.

Summary

Summary of "What True Humility Really Looks Like" Episode of The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast

Podcast Information:

Title: The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast
Host/Author: Ascension
Description: Faith, pop culture, and headline reflections from Fr. Mike Schmitz.
Episode: What True Humility Really Looks Like
Release Date: January 16, 2025

Introduction

In this insightful episode, Father Mike Schmitz delves deep into the concepts of humility and confidence, exploring whether they can coexist and how they manifest in a Christian's life. He challenges common misconceptions and offers a nuanced understanding grounded in truth and faith.

Defining Humility and Confidence

Father Mike begins by questioning the common belief that humility equates to thinking less of oneself. He references the Rick Warren and C.S. Lewis quote:

"Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less." ([02:15])

He clarifies that true humility isn't about self-deprecation but about focusing less on oneself and more on others and the truth.

The Misconception: Humility Equals Shrinking

Many perceive humility as a form of shrinking back or avoiding greatness. Father Mike counters this by asserting that humility doesn't diminish one's capacity to lead or act boldly.

"A person can actually take the reins. The person can actually take the wheel. The person actually can lead in a powerful and bold and confident way while being humble." ([04:30])

True Humility Defined

Father Mike defines true humility as the willingness to tell the truth and live in that truth. This involves:

Acknowledging Strengths and Weaknesses:

"I'm really good at X and also I'm not good at Y." ([06:45])
Receiving Compliments Gracefully:

"Yeah, it was. It was. Good job. Thank you very much." ([08:10])
Accepting Criticism Constructively:

"You can accept the criticism with confidence and humility and live in that truth." ([09:25])

The Interplay Between Confidence and Humility

Contrary to popular belief, confidence isn't opposed to humility. Father Mike explains that confidence stems from competence:

"The more competent you are, the more confident you are." ([12:00])

He emphasizes that genuine confidence arises from knowing one's abilities and limitations, allowing one to navigate challenges effectively.

Competence Leads to Confidence

Using the analogy of driving and handling a flat tire, Father Mike illustrates how competence in specific areas builds confidence:

"The more competent you are at driving your car, the more confident you are about driving your car." ([13:40])

He warns against distorted confidence where individuals overextend their expertise beyond their genuine competencies.

Humility in Recognizing Limitations

Humility involves acknowledging when one lacks competence and having the courage to seek help:

"I'm not confident I can do it on my own, but I'm also humble so I can ask someone for help." ([17:15])

This balance between confidence in one's abilities and humility in recognizing limitations fosters both personal growth and authentic relationships.

Christian Perspective on Humility and Confidence

Father Mike ties the discussion to Christian theology, highlighting that Christians are called to embody both humility and confidence through their relationship with God:

"A Christian... should be simultaneously the most humble and the most confident person you've ever met." ([22:30])

He explains that understanding one's identity in Christ—created for greatness yet recognizing one's brokenness—fuels this duality.

Living in Truth and Grace

Central to living humbly and confidently is embracing the truth of God's love and grace:

"I'm telling the truth. I don't deserve to be loved, but I am loved." ([25:50])

This profound realization empowers Christians to live authentically, free from self-deception, and resilient in the face of criticism or praise.

The Power of Truth in Relationships

Walking in truth allows Christians to engage in relationships with genuine humility and confidence. They are not swayed by external validations but anchored in their faith and understanding of self-worth in God's eyes.

"They're not self-deceived, they're not overly puffed up by compliments and they're not deflated by insults." ([28:10])

Conclusion

Father Mike Schmitz encapsulates the essence of true humility as living in and speaking the truth with confidence rooted in competence and faith. He urges listeners to embrace their God-given strengths and acknowledge their limitations, fostering a balanced and authentic Christian life.

"Confidence is an essential part of humility... These two things, humility and confidence, they really do go together." ([30:05])

Final Thoughts

The episode reinforces that true humility is not about diminishing oneself but about living authentically, grounded in truth and empowered by faith. Father Mike encourages listeners to pursue excellence, build genuine confidence through competence, and maintain humility by recognizing their need for God's grace and the support of others.

Notable Quotes:

"Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less." – Rick Warren/C.S. Lewis ([02:15])
"A person can actually take the reins. The person can actually take the wheel. The person actually can lead in a powerful and bold and confident way while being humble." – Father Mike Schmitz ([04:30])
"I'm really good at X and also I'm not good at Y." – Father Mike Schmitz ([06:45])
"The more competent you are, the more confident you are." – Father Mike Schmitz ([12:00])
"I'm telling the truth. I don't deserve to be loved, but I am loved." – Father Mike Schmitz ([25:50])

This episode offers a profound exploration of humility and confidence, encouraging listeners to integrate these virtues into their daily lives through truth, competence, and faith.

Transcript

A (0:00)

Is it possible to be both humble and confident at the same time? Is it? I don't know. Just kidding. Hi, my name is Father Mike Schmitz, and this is Ascension presents. We fall into this trap of not understanding either of those words. Like we can think, like humble and confident. You can never be both humble and confident because we don't understand what humility is. And I don't know if we really understand even what confidence is. So let's break it down. I think oftentimes we think, and maybe I've said this before, I think that we think that humility is thinking less of yourself. Right. I'm sure you've heard The Rick Warren C.S. lewis quote, humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less. Which I think is really, really great because it clarifies a couple things. The humble person is not the aw, shucks, I'm no good. The humble person is not the one who shrinks. Again. Sometimes we have this picture in our minds that the more humble you are, the more you shrink back from doing anything. The more you shrink back from greatness. The more you shrink back from being bold, the more you shrink back from speaking up, the more humble you are, the smaller you are. I think sometimes we fall into that trap because it's not true that the humble you are, the smaller you are. That a person can actually take the reins. The person can actually take the wheel. The person actually can lead in a powerful and bold and confident way while being humble, just like a person can shrink while being proud. So what is true humility? I would say true humility is nothing more and nothing less than simply being willing to tell the truth and to live in that truth. I'll say it like the willingness to tell the truth and the confidence to live in that truth. So the truly humble person would be able to say, I'm really good at X and also I'm not good at Y. Or the truly humble person would be able to say, someone says, hey, that was a really good job. They'd be able to say, yeah, it was. It was. Good job. Thank you very much. I can receive that compliment. Truly humble person can receive a compliment and the truly humble person can receive a criticism. And it's true. You can accept the criticism with confidence and humility and live in that truth. If it's not true. This is the crazy thing. If the compliment is not true or the criticism is not true, then the truly humble person isn't bothered either because they know the truth and they have the confidence to live in the truth. That's one of the reasons why every one of us can choose to be a humble person simply by choosing to acknowledge the truth and to be comfortable and at peace and confident in that truth. In fact, confidence is not opposed to humility. I would say this, I would say confidence is an essential part of humility. Leaving the word confidence, it means, it comes from two words, right? Confide, which means with faith. So to live with confidence and to live confidently is to live with faith. I would say it like this, is to live in trust. You know, people talk about like, you know, we just really need to build people's self confidence. You need to build up people's self esteem. And I would say, well, yes, okay, that's wonderful. But how does confidence grow? I would maintain that confidence primarily comes from competence, that the more competent you are, the more confident you are. So think about, you're driving your car by yourself now. The more competent you are at driving your car, the more competent you are about driving your car. If you had to get a flat tire, but you're like, I don't know how to change a tire, I don't know how to fix a flat tire, so I'm not competent, therefore I'm not confident. But if you do know, you know, actually, you know cars really well and your car breaks down, you're probably pretty confident that you can fix it. Why? Because you have the competence to be able to fix your car. So, so critically, competence leads to confidence, which is one of the reasons why the pursuit of excellence in our, in our lives. The more excellent you become, the more confident you ought to be. We've seen it a thousand times, right? Someone is good at one thing, and so they claim to or think of themselves as an expert in everything. I mean, this happens all of the time, maybe even with people on YouTube. But if someone's good at one thing, sometimes they have this distorted confidence, this distorted sense of themselves that they must be automatically good at everything. If they have a really good take on X, they must have a great take on A through the other letters. But the truly humble person would know, oh, I have competence in changing a tire, therefore I'm confident when it comes to changing a tire. I don't have as much competence in, I don't know, fly fishing, for example, therefore I'm not confident about that. But the more a person is willing to acknowledge the truth and walk in that truth, the more confident they would be because they know the truth. I'm going into a situation where I am Competent, therefore, into a situation where I'm confident. But if I also know I'm going into a situation where I'm not competent, I have the humility, again, acknowledging the truth, that here's a situation where I'm going to need some help. Therefore I have the boldness, the courage, the forthrightness, the fortitude to be able to ask for help. Because in this case, I'm not competent, therefore I'm not confident I can do it on my own, but I'm also humble so I can ask someone for help. Does that make sense? These two things, these humility and confidence, they really do go together. But above everything else, we know this. We know that at the end of the day, we know that we're not enough. That's what humility will remind us of. Because in humility, remember, he's living the truth. So I know, yeah, these are all the things that I'm strong at. But humility also would also say, and here's my limitations, which is one of the most incredible reasons why a Christian must be the most humble and the most confidence person you've ever met, that the Christian, the one who's been adopted by the Father as a beloved daughter or beloved Son, as one who's been washed in the blood of the Lamb, as one who's been claimed by Christ, should be simultaneously the most humble and the most confident person you've ever met. Why? Because I know the truth. The truth is God has made me for greatness. He's made me in his image. And I also know the truth that I'm broken. I know the truth that here's God who's redeemed me by his grace and by his love. And I also know the truth that I often turn away from his grace and his love, this willingness to live in the truth and to walk in the truth and to know that even at my lowest, he still loves me. For you to realize this, that even at your worst, he still wants you, is so critical because then I can say, I'm telling the truth. I don't deserve to be loved, but I am loved. So humility, I'm telling the truth. I don't deserve to be loved, but I am loved. Confidence. There's something so powerful about a Christian who walks this way. They're not self deceived, they're not overly puffed up by compliments and they're not deflated by insults, but they have the humility of walking in the truth and the confidence of being able to bring that truth out into their relationships and out into the world. Does that make sense? I don't know. I think it does. Anyway, Smerals here to essentially presents My name's Father Mike. God bless. I have this defying gravity in my head. I'm like, I don't really like this idea of trying to make these villains overly sympathetic and saying, well, the real reason why they're so bad is because they're not actually bad. Like Maleficent. Like, if you only understood her. Like, well, yeah, everyone's got a backstory, but you don't have to kill people.