The Friend Zone Podcast: “Year of the Fire Horse”

Episode Date: January 28, 2026
Hosts: Dustin Ross, Hey Fran Hey (Francesca), Asante
Network: Loud Speakers Network

Episode Overview

This episode welcomes listeners into 2026 with an “energy forecast”—an annual check-in on personal goals, the state of the world, and the ways listeners and hosts are navigating the balance between ambition, mental health, and the heavy realities of current events. Against a backdrop of social and political upheaval, the trio explores journaling as self-reflection, the symbolism of the "Year of the Fire Horse", community activism, and the power of staying present. Listeners are treated to classic Friend Zone warmth, humor, and vulnerability, plus music and TV recommendations that reflect the mood of the moment.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening Vibes: Petty Resolutions & Keith Sweat Wisdom

• The hosts kick off with a humorous recount of a Breakfast Club interview with Keith Sweat.
• [03:04] Dustin Ross shares:
  • “I want everybody cheated on me to do bad.”
    This petty mantra becomes the running theme for the year—extracting gems and leaning into truth, even if it’s messy or raw.
• The episode’s vibe embraces forthrightness, boundaries, and letting go of fake positivity.

2. Snow Day Stories & Winter Comfort

• The group swaps snow day comfort food stories.
  • Dustin describes making “a pot of black eyed peas with smoked turkey necks,” noting the importance of winter rituals and feeling “fat and sassy.”
  • Asante talks about adapting TikTok recipes and the joys of communal gaming and cooking.
• [04:38] Francesca asks: “How was your snow day?” sparking cozy, detailed conversation about home, food, and community.

3. Community Recommendations: Black-Owned Book Tracking

• [13:51] Black Business of the Week:
  • Francesca spotlights The StoryGraph – a Black-owned, modern, mood-based book tracking platform, praised for its positive user environment versus the more critical, sometimes toxic Goodreads.
    • “I am so happy y’all put us on... I’m much happier energetically. And I love that it was created by a Black woman and a Black man. So that makes it even better.”
      —Francesca [15:08]

4. Listener Letters & Tech Talk

• A recap of supportive listener comments regarding old phones, cloud storage trust issues, and security risks with outdated devices.
• Hilarious community solidarity around having “ancient” iPhones.
• [22:33] Francesca reads:
  • “Apparently the 12 lets out more radiation than any of the other phones. Why the 12 specifically? I don’t know... but y’all had some perspective that was making me [pause].”

5. Pop Culture & Reality TV Reactions

• Deep dive into reactions to the Mary Cosby documentary (Real Housewives of Salt Lake City), with both Dustin and Asante finding it heavy on “feelings, not facts.”
  • “It was stuff on there that Mary was dead ass wrong for… but the rest... it wasn’t anything concrete in that documentary that made me feel any way.”
    —Dustin [27:33]

6. Energy Forecast: Setting Intentions in a Chaotic Year

[42:13] Francesca introduces the yearly "energy forecast":

• Journaling as a time capsule—looking back on stressors and successes.
  • “Are you reliable in the shit that you want to do?”
    —Dustin [46:10]
• The value of tracking growth, keeping promises to oneself, and honoring progress.

Personal Check-Ins and Reflections

• Dustin:

  • Laser focus on goals, organizing love life, and “eliminating” anything interrupting progress.
  • Candor about the political climate:
    • “The world is literally a prolapsed butthole right now.” [48:07]
    • Expresses frustration with recent elections, impacts on immigrant friends, and the need for boundary-setting.

• Asante:

  • “Another year of optimization” — moving to Charlotte as a life upgrade, eyeing next relocation, holding space for self while acknowledging service to others.
  • “Even though the conditions of things overall are how they are, I’m just still going to keep fighting.” [54:36]

• Francesca:

  • Reflects on personal seasons: hibernation, renewal, and now, “Year of the Fire Horse”—an energy of power, reemergence, and action.
  • Notes resonance across Chinese astrology, numerology, and intuition: collective shifts from “shedding” to “being ready to run.”
  • Observes the tension between self-care boundaries and the call to community action amid political and social crises.

7. Navigating the Present: Political Reality & Community Responsibility

• The trio examine how to “hold two things at the same time”: pursuing personal dreams while facing societal breakdown.
  • Francesca: “There’s a through line... I feel this generation has gotten really comfortable with boundaries. But... therapy-speak language has given us quote-unquote power to actually disengage from each other, as opposed to it strengthening and fortifying our relationships.” [64:16]
  • Dustin: “Sometimes you have to think about what situations serve you... We in a season of efficiency over here.” [51:14]
• Discussion on protests, ICE violence, and how even filming (as opposed to intervening) has become normalized.
  • “This is a time where we’re all going to have to ask ourselves, how can I muster up the strength, if necessary, to physically get into the game?”
    —Dustin [67:00]

8. Small Acts, Big Impact: Volunteering & Local Action

• Francesca shares getting involved with soup kitchens, supporting local children, and emphasizes heart-centered, offline activism.
• Encouragement to find “your role”—big or small—in the community, and not make service about optics or social media.

9. Wellness Segment: Creating Healthier Tech Habits

• Practical tips for reducing phone addiction:
  • “We have a rule... as soon as we get into the restaurant, we put both of our phones in my purse.”
    —Francesca [93:41]
• Discusses mindful eating, intentional communication, and the physiological/psychological benefits of phone-free time.
• Debate over FaceTime and multitasking etiquette; the generational gap in digital behaviors.

10. Music Man & TV Land: Cultural Recommendations

Music Segment [112:01+]

• Music History:
  • Shoutout to J. Cole’s birthday, “We Are the World” recording (Jan 28, 1985), and 10th anniversary of Rihanna’s ‘Anti.'
• Song Picks:
  • Salt – “God Protect Me From My Enemies” (Fran)
  • Tone Stith – “Fly” (Fran)
  • Tanerélle – “Feels Like Love” (Fran)
  • The Kid Laroi – “Cold” (Dustin)
  • Absolutely – “I Just Don’t Know You Yet” (Dustin)
  • June Tabor – “Conversation Pit” (Dustin)
  • 42 Dugg & Skilla Baby – “Thick” (Dustin)
  • Ari Lennox – “Mobbing in DC” (Asante) & general praise for her new project ‘Vacancy’
  • Dawn Richard & S. Fidelity – “Play” (Asante)
  • Girlfriend – “Deep” (Asante)

TV Highlights

• Hitmakers (Netflix):
  • All hosts rave about this music songwriting show for giving overdue shine to writers and producers, especially star Blue.
    • “She was the head team on Renaissance [Beyoncé].” – Francesca [149:11]
• Real Housewives of Potomac:
  • Dustin previews Karen’s post-jail episode and the upcoming red-themed reunion, with special attention to Wendy Oseffo’s look.
• Kim Wayans: “Still Got It with Izzy Fabulous” (YouTube)
  • Comedy fans recommended to subscribe.

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• On Boundaries and Self-Trust:
  “Are you reliable in the shit that you want to do?... We worry a lot about trust in other people, but I think it’s more important to 100% trust your goddamn self.” —Dustin [46:13]

• On Today’s World:
  “The world is literally a prolapsed butthole right now.” —Dustin [48:07]

• On Political Apathy:
  “I have very strong feelings about this. Very strong feelings. Because what’s going on right now is literally out of control.” —Dustin [74:37]

• On Generation & Boundaries:
  “I feel this generation has gotten really comfortable with boundaries... but therapy-speak language has given us so much... to actually disengage from each other.” —Francesca [64:19]

• On Action vs. Optics:
  “Putting yourself on the line can express itself in many ways. It doesn’t have to be you jumping at an ICE agent, obviously. But just: what are you doing for your community who is reeling after something like this?” —Francesca [84:52]

Memorable Moments

• [03:15] Theme Introduction:
  “Wise words being quoted on the Friend Zone today. God damn it. I want everybody cheated on me to do bad.”
• [42:13] Energy Forecast Tradition:
  Fran opens the “energy forecast,” connecting it to journaling and personal archives.
• [74:37] Dustin's Passionate Rant:
  His frustration on political willful ignorance and the continuous harm against marginalized people.
• [93:41] Phone-Free Dining:
  Fran’s family rule to enhance presence and improve digestion—an example of small changes with big impact.
• [145:15] Hitmakers Praise:
  The hosts’ enthusiastic recommendation and analysis of the Netflix show, especially songwriter Blue’s brilliance.

Closing Thoughts & Listener Call-to-Action

The episode closes with an encouragement to use this time as both a collective and personal “journal entry,” hoping that one day these stressful times become mere memories. The hosts invite listeners to share their own ways of navigating balance, activism, and self-care in the comments for future discussion.

Additional Resources

• Black-owned book tracker: The StoryGraph
• Patreon for weathering the news & community: The Friend Zone on Patreon
• Music history: “We Are the World” & Rihanna’s ‘Anti’
• TV picks: Hitmakers (Netflix), Real Housewives of Potomac, Kim Wayans’ Still Got It, Chasing Atlanta

Time-Stamped Key Segments

• [03:04] — Keith Sweat’s “Do Bad” wisdom
• [13:51] — The StoryGraph Black Business of the Week
• [27:33] — Mary Cosby documentary reaction
• [42:13] — Energy forecast tradition and journaling
• [64:19] — The dark side of “boundaries” and collective inaction
• [67:00] — When to film and when to intervene: new activism questions
• [84:52] — “Putting yourself on the line” in big and small ways
• [93:41] — Creating phone-free rituals
• [112:01+] — Music highlights, including J. Cole, “We Are the World”
• [145:15] — Hitmakers (Netflix) deep dive

In Summary

“Year of the Fire Horse” is a powerful, introspective episode that balances laughter, hard truths, and actionable hope. The Friend Zone crew gives us the space to process a chaotic world while showing that even small shifts in our personal and community habits can be revolutionary. Their blend of honesty, empathy, and humor makes the episode a nourishing listen for anyone seeking inspiration or just a sense of “not being alone” in turbulent times.