The Friend Zone — Episode: "The GMV"

Date: April 8, 2026
Hosts: Dustin Ross, Hey Fran Hey, Assanté
Podcast Theme: Exploring mental health, mental wealth, and mental hygiene with humor, authenticity, and real-life experiences.

Main Theme / Purpose

This episode, titled "The GMV," delves into the idea of how life doesn't always follow the plans or timelines we’re handed, and how the definition of success is evolving. With Asanté leading the week, the hosts reflect on personal milestones, societal expectations, redefining success, community, and the importance of staying mentally and emotionally nimble as life twists and turns. The episode incorporates candid stories from their upbringings, transitions into adulthood, and the impact of community on progression. Along the way, they touch humorously and thoughtfully on pop culture, listener feedback, and wellness.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Hot Topics in the Culture & Personal Life Updates

• Offset Incident & Rapper Lifestyles (01:06–07:30):
  Dustin shares a jaw-dropping story about rapper Offset allegedly being shot at a casino, highlighting the pitfalls of celebrity, addiction, and street life, and urging talent to refocus on opportunities rather than self-destructive paths.
  • Quote: “Offset, get your shit together, man. Cause if I hear one more headline, I'm not going to do nothing, but I'mma be mad.” — Dustin (07:30)
• The Power of Nature & Allergies (08:22–13:00):
  Fran discusses embracing outdoor activities, the joy of Portland’s natural beauty, and the onset of potential allergies—a novel experience for her.

2. Black Business of the Week (19:50–20:55)

• Bird Pizzeria, Charlotte, NC:
  Asanté highlights a Black-owned pizza shop featured in the New York Times' “22 Best Pizza Places in the U.S.,” and the gang discusses their own favorite pizza experiences.

3. Listener Letters & Comments (23:12–32:55)

• Florida’s Sunshine Law:
  Explaining Florida’s bizarre news cycle and openness with true crime coverage.
• AI & Media Addiction:
  Reflections on the addictive nature of social media as designed by companies like Meta.
• Declining Traditional Honors:
  Prince’s refusal of a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame sparks audience reflections on what it means to claim or reject societal benchmarks of success.
• Brandy Memoir for Book Club:
  Community engagement celebrated as they announce Brandy’s “Phases” memoir as the next book for Patreon.

4. Main Discussion — Life’s Timelines & Redefining Success (42:41–119:58)

The Premise (42:41–45:44)

• Question Raised: What happens when you follow all the advice and prescribed steps but life doesn’t look or feel how you expected?
• Reflection: The “life script”—school, job, marriage, house—doesn’t fit everyone, and timelines are shifting with each generation.
  • Quote: “Has the definition of success changed or are we just figuring it out in real time?” — Asanté (42:49)

Personal Journeys & Breaking the Mold (45:44–56:54)

• Fran: Attending college out of familial obligation, finding real fulfillment through creative, self-directed work (YouTube, podcasting), and now helping to pave new industries.
• Dustin: Growing up in a restrictive religious environment, learning to form his own identity, and gaining unique communication skills he uses now—while acknowledging the hardship and healing involved.
• Asanté: Going straight into work, building skills in customer service, and developing social prowess—highlighting alternate ways of achieving life readiness.

Generational Shifts & Social Norms (67:44–74:00)

• Generational Differences: Older generations didn’t have today’s distractions or opportunities; their versions of success and certainty were shaped by available options and socio-legal barriers.
• Access and Opportunity: Fran describes her life-altering experience being identified by a supportive (gay Puerto Rican) teacher and gaining access to private school—sparking a conversation about luck and the impact of mentorship.
  • Quote: “Access really does change the rigidity that people have created for us.” — Fran (74:00)

Community, Connection & Defining Home (85:12–90:39)

• The Ideal of Home: Fran shares her lifelong dream of a serene home, inspired by an upbringing in less-than-ideal circumstances.
• Belonging: All three reflect on role models, older siblings, and neighbors who shaped their understanding of “cool,” friendship, and fellowship as central to fulfillment.

“The GMV” & Success Redefined (98:30–118:14)

• Modern Success: Entrepreneurship, community-building, and “non-traditional” pathways are now common benchmarks of success (e.g., internet careers, tradwife movement, etc.).
• Constantly Evolving Goals: Success is more personalized and changes as life changes; big and small wins matter.

Practical Reflections (118:14–119:32)

• Success Today: Kindness, stability, security, and adapting to current circumstances are more relevant markers than arbitrary societal checklists.
  • Quote: “Right now, success looks like being kind to others, creating stability, and doing what you can to combat literal evil forces presented against us.” — Dustin (117:26)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I can't stand a ‘I did it first ass bitch.’ Let people have their moment!” — Dustin (60:03)
• “We're just playing a different game than what we were prepared for.” — Asanté (120:05)
• “Allow your successes to change, and also to not hit the mark on some of them, because I failed at a couple things...it didn't pan out and it’s like, okay, I tried, what's the next thing?” — Fran (118:54)
• “If I’m standing in a meteor hole...call me a n****r if you want to, that’s gonna...I’m putting your face right in that molten...Whatever that is.” — Dustin, on the absurdity of clinging to social systems during existential threats (112:13)
• “Life for us ain't been no crystal staircase.” — Dustin (93:56)

Important Segment Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamp | |--------------------------------------|---------------| | Offset incident & cultural headlines | 01:06–07:30 | | Outdoor living, Portland, and allergies | 08:22–13:00 | | Black business of the week | 19:50–20:55 | | Listener letters & feedback | 23:12–32:55 | | The GMV: Redefining Success & Timelines | 42:41–119:58 | | “This Week in Wellness” (Aging & fitness) | 121:37–137:11 | | “This Week in Music” | 137:19–161:47 | | “This Week in TV” (RHOA & more) | 161:47–171:16 |

Music & TV Highlights

“Songs to Play, Listens Lately” (144:43)

• Fran’s Playlist: Iman Omari’s “Energy,” Sir’s “The Real,” Anderson .Paak’s “Come Down”
• Dustin’s Picks: Crime Mob’s “Circles,” Twisted Sister’s “We’re Not Gonna Take It,” Zaya Bell’s “Deserve,” Xavier Omar’s “Say It”
• Asanté’s Beats: The System’s “You Are In My System,” Isaiah Haran’s “This Girl Wants Everything,” Justin Bieber’s “Swap It Out,” India Shawn’s “Rain on Me”

TV Segment (161:47)

• Real Housewives of Rhode Island: New, messy, authentic, and entertaining.
• Real Housewives of Atlanta: Season 17—new cast including Pinky Cole and K. Michelle, strong return to form, full dramatic moments.
• Bell Collective: Birmingham: New franchise focusing on Black women entrepreneurs, premiering on Dustin's birthday.

Wellness Segment: Fitness for Longevity (121:37–137:11)

• Fran urges listeners to design current habits—particularly around fitness and mobility—for the elder they want to become, focusing on quality of life, not just aesthetics.
  • “Do you ever consider the things you’re doing now—how is that contributing to the elder that you want to be?” — Fran (129:03)

Overall Tone & Takeaways

• Warm, candid, and humorous: The hosts blend humor with vulnerability, making life’s difficulties approachable.
• Supportive, celebratory: They champion each other’s wins, encourage listeners to celebrate their own milestones, and highlight Black excellence in business and arts.
• Encouragement to question the script: The core message is about writing your own definition of “success,” adapting as you grow, and not clinging to outdated roadmaps provided by society, family, or tradition.

Final Thought

The hosts leave listeners with practical affirmation: Success is not one fixed destination—it’s a series of choices, pivots, and moments, both big and small. Stay intentional, be kind, honor your journey, and don’t be afraid to step off the mapped path. You and your story are valid, wherever you are on the timeline.