The Career Advice Nobody Tells You

Summary

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Podcast Summary:

The GaryVee Audio Experience
Episode Title: The Career Advice Nobody Tells You
Host: Gary Vaynerchuk
Date: September 8, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode features Gary Vaynerchuk in an open Q&A with residents participating in VaynerMedia’s incubator program. The discussion centers on authentic career development, handling uncertainty, internal and external expectations, networking, diversity and inclusion, resilience, and actionable advice for young (and not-so-young) professionals. Gary emphasizes the value of intent, self-awareness, and the practical truth that career journeys are non-linear.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Origin of the Residency Program

(00:13–04:05)

• Gary explains the motivation behind creating VaynerMedia’s residency/incubator for young professionals, describing it as “selfless, selfish behavior.”
• The intent is to create a win-win: providing genuine opportunity for young people locked out of the industry while also potentially identifying future hires for VaynerMedia.
• Quote:

  “We’re paying to train you—like, real talk. So it’s a real fucking winning move for a lot of people, obviously… I’m just hoping to make it a win-win for everyone. And in general, that’s how I think about business ideas.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([02:11])

2. Making Networking Comfortable & Effective

(04:06–07:42)

• Gary underscores that the best way to build connections is through shared interests, not just work conversations.
• He encourages residents to get comfortable with discomfort, likening networking for introverts to how he approaches working out and eating well—which he does out of necessity, not enjoyment.
• “Most people don’t network well because they’re scared of rejection. But this is a nice place. People are nice here. So saying hi is a fruitful concept.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([06:52])

3. Grace with Yourself During Career Changes

(07:52–12:08)

• Gary dives deep into the need for self-compassion, especially for those transitioning careers or feeling behind.
• He emphasizes that most external judgments, including hiring decisions, are deeply subjective and often serendipitous.
• Quote:

  "Why would you not show yourself grace? The rest of the world is shitting on you at all times. Why not be kind to yourself? Don’t join in.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([09:29])

• He urges listeners to break free from the need for outside validation—even from loved ones.

4. Navigating Expectations as an Immigrant or First-Generation Professional

(12:22–14:07)

• Gary shares his experience as an immigrant, noting the cultural weight of familial expectations but stressing that ultimately, personal happiness must come first.
• "You could admire and love your parents the most … but you cannot live for them. And the second you stop living for them and live for your happiness, you actually deliver to your parents what they wanted all along."
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([13:00])

5. Patience Versus Complacency & Starting Late

(14:16–17:20)

• Addresses concerns about starting careers late or being "behind".
• Gary draws from his own story (starting VaynerMedia in his mid-30s with no office or money) to debunk the myth of linear timelines.
• “Everyone, when I talk about patience, I do not talk about complacency. They're two different words. I am patient, but I’m obnoxiously ambitious, and I go hard every day.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([15:13])
• He suggests using one's unique journey as a narrative asset when reaching out to future employers.

6. The Most Important Takeaway from Vayner

(17:24–18:43)

• Gary hopes employees realize they don’t have to work for environments that make them miserable:

  "That you don’t have to work somewhere where you don’t feel good… there’s a way to go hard but not be in an environment that makes you unhappy or anxious." ([17:39])

• He values practical, contemporary skills over theoretical learning.

7. Advice to Younger Self & Perfectionism

(18:43–22:21)

• Gary identifies his past inability to be candid as his biggest regret.
• He encourages listeners to take risks and get comfortable with mistakes, emphasizing that fear of making mistakes leads to stagnation.
• “You gotta get comfortable with making mistakes, otherwise you’ll always be lower middle management.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([21:21])

8. Social Media’s Ever-Changing Landscape

(22:26–24:05)

• Gary’s key to keeping VaynerMedia relevant is adaptability: he doesn’t try to predict trends but moves quickly when attention shifts (e.g., TikTok).
• He plans for the future (e.g., VR) but is “practitioner-led” and reactive to real change.

9. Leading with Humility & Letting Go of Attachments

(24:10–26:16)

• Gary highlights humility as a core leadership trait—being open to being wrong and not getting attached to his ideas.
• “Humility is the single most important trait for a leader besides conviction… If I get stuck on my own shit, the world doesn’t care about my feelings.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([25:13])

10. Daily Gratitude Practices

(26:16–27:54)

• Gary roots daily gratitude in perspective—specifically, reflecting every day on the health and safety of his family.
• This practice helps him contextualize stress and anxiety.

11. Diversity, Inclusion, and DEI as a Business Imperative

(27:56–30:19)

• He foregrounds DEI as essential to the ethos and success of VaynerMedia, not a checkbox.
• “It’s very easy to prioritize it. When you prioritize it, it’s just like, why is our culture good? Because I care for it to be good.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([28:53])

12. Resilience, Fear, and Mental Health vs. Hustle Culture

(31:34–39:16)

• Gary describes his approach to fear as internalizing and shedding it through gratitude and self-awareness, not projecting it onto others.
• He deconstructs the contemporary conflation of ambition with burnout, asserting that hard work only becomes toxic if it’s disconnected from passion.
• “Hard work is remarkably enjoyable when you like what you’re doing and it’s not when you don’t… Don’t burn yourself out, don’t even do it.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([34:43])
• He sees insecurity and entitlement—not work ethic—as the real roots of workplace malaise and societal depression.

13. Entrepreneurial Lessons from Building Resy

(39:19–41:55)

• Gary and Ben Leventhal won the NYC restaurant reservation market by focusing on creating the best product and securing the most desirable venues.
• The key insight: Success in two-way marketplaces is about quality of supply and driving demand.

14. Discovering Your Passion Through Experimentation

(41:55–44:42)

• Gary advises recent graduates and young professionals to “taste” as many activities and roles as possible to discover passions.
• “You gotta go eat oysters and sweetbreads and uni and tacos and banana. Like, you have to eat shit. Right? Same with this … Join every club, everything… unless you’re tasting, you don’t know.” ([44:10])

15. Dealing with Rejection and Building True Humility

(44:56–47:03)

• Gary contends that the ability to handle rejection comes from internal humility and detachment from others’ opinions—while also not over-estimating your own.
• “I don’t give a shit about other people’s opinions, but I also don’t think my shit’s right.”
  – Gary Vaynerchuk ([47:03])

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Intent:

  “When I think about the net net happiness and retention of this company, we’re out of control good for ad land and I’m proud of that. And I think the only way that happens is intent.”
  ([03:41])

• On Grace:

  “The relationship you have with yourself is literally the whole game.”
  ([09:16])

• On Risk and Experimentation:

  "You should be spending... people who really dwell or... are passionate, excited about finding their thing. Well, you've got to find it. So... go do a ballroom dancing class, right? Take a course on Coursera for, like, accounting... Unless you're tasting, you don't know."
  ([44:00])

• On DEI:

  "It’s good for business."
  ([28:35])

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:13 – Why Gary Created the Residency Program
• 04:06 – Making Networking Comfortable
• 07:52 – Self-Compassion and Grace
• 12:22 – Advice for Immigrants/First-Generation Professionals
• 14:16 – Patience, Complacency, and "Late" Starters
• 18:43 – The Biggest Lesson for Gary’s Younger Self
• 22:43 – Adapting to the Social Media Landscape
• 24:10 – Letting Go of Ideas as a Leader
• 26:16 – Practicing Daily Gratitude
• 27:56 – DEI as Imperative
• 31:34 – Handling Fear & Mental Health Versus Hustle
• 39:19 – Building and Winning with Resy
• 41:55 – Discovering Your Passion by "Tasting"
• 44:56 – Handling Rejection and Developing Humility

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Final Takeaways

Gary Vee’s candid, high-energy style illuminates a modern, human-centric approach to career building: Intent matters more than background; humility trumps performance perfection; experimenting widely leads to discoverable passion; and a truly sustainable hustle is rooted in joy and alignment. For any early-career or mid-career professional, these lessons demystify the myth of prescribed paths and re-center fulfillment, real self-worth, and resilience as the ultimate career wins.

Transcript

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

This is the GaryVee audio experience.

[Moderator]

We are here today for the open Q and A with Gary, the best buyer side really at the residency. All right, who's gonna be first?

[Jacob Jesma]

That was actually so coincident because I didn't think I was gonna be the first person to go. But it's nice to meet you, Gary. My name is Jacob Jesma. I'm one of the PCs residents. So I have two questions. My first question would be as the CEO, what was that sparking point for? Like, I'm going to create a residency program that's like this incubator for younger professionals that are really going to. Even if we don't continue with the program, we're taking away so many things from the program. So like what was that thought process was like, I'm going to be the person who like builds this.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

That's a great question, brother. Thank you. It was a really clear vision of selfless, selfish behavior. Meaning a lot of times as a businessman, kind of the way I like to roll. And a lot of you probably have a good sense that I produce a lot of content and I'm out there. I really like the giving part of my life along with the entrepreneur. I'm a very extreme juxtaposition of opposite energy. I love being an entrepreneur and a capitalist and I want to win and all that stuff. But I'm infatuated with giving back and doing right things. Most of my charitable work and non profit board I keep pretty quiet and then I try to mix that energy into my day to day. So as you know, Jacob, to your call and I'm like very impressed and grateful that even the way you asked it, all of you now get to put vaynermedia in your LinkedIn regardless if you're here or you're not after this. And I know already cause I've talked to a lot of people that have gone through this program. It just gets people jobs. And so we're paying to train you like real talk. So it's like a real fucking winning move for a lot of people, obviously. On the flip side, I also want to hire as many people from this as possible or we'll hire as many as we can right now. But like some of you are destined to get an email from us in seven months even if you don't continue with us tomorrow, like right after. That's cool. Plus some of you will meet each other. So just like it's a lot of good. And my brain's always thinking about like one plus one equals 11, like what can I do? That's good for everyone. That's why I think all of you that have been able to capture without knowing, you know, obviously if you're fully remote in the middle of nowhere, you're not gonna be able to feel the culture even through zoom. You can feel it to some degree, but not all the way. But the ones that have really, whether through zoom or physically, have been able to feel it. There's a reason that people are happier at this company than other companies. Of course, amongst 2,000 people, there's people that are unhappy. The serendipity of the wrong boss, the wrong account, A million things can go into it. But when I think about the net net happiness and retention of this company, we're out of control. Good for ad land and I'm proud of that. And I think the only way that happens is intent. And to your point, Jacob, the way this happened was intent. How do I put on more young people that have no way to get into this industry other than this program? And then our company so hot that the second this is on their resume, they're good. Like they're good if they put in the work to get out there and if. And then more importantly or not more importantly, but equally importantly for me is hopefully every time we do these things, ironically, full disclosure, this is not one of those times. There's been times where we were able to hire most of the residents. That was a different time. That's when, you know, now we're not in that full place. But obviously, you know, I know there's gonna be people that go through this, go work in the industry for five years and then reapply in five years to Vayner and it's gonna be like super fun for us to be like, oh shit, they were in the fucking residency program. So I'm excited about that. So I'm just hoping to make it a win win for everyone. And in general, that's how I think about business ideas.

[Jacob Jesma]

Awesome.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Okay, thank you.

[Jacob Jesma]

And then my second question. Now that we only have not only, but now that we have four weeks left, I guess it's gonna be very important for us to continue networking with people. But I'll be very blunt. I would say that I struggle when it comes to having those one on one with people where it's not where we're just having conversations about work. So how would you suggest, like as again, young professionals here at Vayner or not at Vayner, how are we going to build those connections and relationships with.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

People by talking about Shit that you like. Cool. Okay, so, like, let me break that down for you. There's a reason we have slack and we have tons of channels with different stuff. To your point, it might be difficult for you have that combo, but you might be able to go into some of our general chats and just talk about the game last night or the restaurant you went to. People network through interests, not just through work realities. Right. So, I mean, look, there's also something called like breaking through with things that aren't comfortable. So let's think that through. Right. You know, to Sarah's point, as you can see, she talks about she's been working for 25 years and that's hard for her too. Let me tell you something that's hard for me, Jacob. Working out and eating well.

[Jacob Jesma]

Yeah. That is, as someone who goes to the gym every day, it's very hard, especially the eating part.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah. So for me, I could, you know, you're a young man, but I can tell you at 38, I had never put a muscle in my body and never ate properly in my life. And so this morning when I worked out and Woke up at 6:45, even though I worked until midnight last night, that wasn't easy, but I did it. And so, you know when someone says, hey, I struggle with networking. Well, if you value networking and you understand networking is valuable, I'm aware you may be introverted. I'm aware that it might come easier for Fernando C. Than you. Or it may not. People are different. But just because people are different doesn't mean certain things aren't valuable. And it doesn't mean that people aren't capable to do things that don't feel comfortable or come easy to them. I don't work out and eat better now for the last 10 years for kicks and giggles or cause I like it, I fucking hate it. Ten years later, I hate it, but I do it. And so there's also a little bit of that element of real life, which is it may not come easy to you, but if you think it's important, you may have to learn how to get uncomfortable. And I will tell you right now, one of the biggest issues in the world, and not for Gen Z, for boomers, for anybody who's 100 and for anyone who's won. One of the great issues in society right now is people aren't breaking through and getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. We got real soft out here. So also another way to think about what I just said, but everything works. Life is life. Like it's going to be what it's going to be. You know what I mean? But, but, but I think finding a way to make networking easy for you and everyone here, I always think that's around common interests and tactics. I tell everybody now we're a little bit in a virtual world, but I always told people and anyone for these next four weeks that are in any of these offices, live in the cafeteria and just say, hi, this is a nice place. Most people don't network well because they're scared of rejection. Right? They're scared of being blown off. They're insecure. But this is a nice place. Like people are nice here. So saying hi is like a fruitful concept.

[Jacob Jesma]

Thank you so much for definitely putting me on there and I guess the rest of us, I'll definitely pass the question on to the next person. But it was great to I guess officially meet you.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Pleasure, my friend.

[Marisha]

My name is Marisha. I'm a PCs resident as well. So nice to meet you. Gary, I'm currently reading your book 12 and a half. I'm not super fast into it, but the first chapter really shocked me. The chapter about gratitude. Honestly, the stats were really humbling and low key, depressing, but really good. For my perspective. I want to go to a quote you said. When you develop perspective, the timelines you set for your goals naturally shift. And I'm currently in a kind of career transition. I'm 30, so I'm coming from customer service and doing things that are very different from what I'm doing here at Vayner. And I've been struggling to kind of get into that mind frame that I am kind of starting at the beginning. And I don't need to know everything immediately. And that's really hard for me because I know this isn't like anybody else, but I really like to do things that I'm good at and to kind of get better at things is really hard, a hard pill to swallow. So I was wondering if you could speak to kind of the grace that we can show ourselves as we enter into new phases in our lives and try new things.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

So I love you for this question. I think it's. I think first of all, your wordsmithing of everything that you just asked was extremely strong and I really, really, really took note of that. So you should know that you're incredibly articulate.

[Marisha]

Thank you.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Look, grace to oneself is probably the thing I think about the most subconsciously. I talk so much about not beating up yourself like this just becomes the relationship you have with yourself is literally the whole Game. And so my question is actually the reverse. What's the alternative? And why would you not show yourself grace? So it's really funny when you just gave your context, I'm like, ah, makes sense, right? You're hanging out with all these 23 year olds even though you look 18, by the way, you really shook me with your 30. I was like, is she in high school? So look, I view this as very practical. I don't understand why you would beat yourself up. I'm not sure why one wouldn't want to give themselves grace. The rest of the world is shitting on you at all times. Why not be kind to yourself? Don't join in, right? And really, I think what works for me, and I think this is gonna be the biggest question you need to ask yourself is how much do you value outside validation and from whom? You know, I think it's really easy to give yourself grace once you don't give a fuck what people think about you, including your parents and siblings and plus ones. It gets really easy. It gets real easy. So I think one's relationship with themselves I think is directly correlated to their relationship with other people's opinions. I admire my mother more than life. I think she's the single best human being on earth and I give her an unbelievable amount of credit for everything that I am, comma. I do not live my life based on her opinions or for her validation. And I think this is what you need to be thinking about. I'll give you a good one. Team. When I tell you if you're selected to get a full time offer versus not, I'm gonna say this very crystal clear to you. It is pure serendipity of a couple people's opinions. It is not a reflection that you're good or bad. If the God of good and bad came down after this process is done, I am sure that she would say to us, you were right about this person, but you were wrong about like. It's just, that's how life works. You know what I mean? It's just serendipity. It's just serendipity. I think too many people have been trained by school and life to think there's a right way to do shit. There is no right way. There's life, serendipity. Some people are gonna be like, yo, this is the fucking best. And they get a full time gig here and they have a massive career. But guess what? You know, what they don't know is that if they actually didn't get a job here Went to a different job, that they were gonna meet the love of their life in that job, and they would have married a much better person for them there than if they would have stayed here. How about that shit life?

[Marisha]

Yeah, that's so good. I did want to also add another question just to follow up with Jacob and his two questions.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yo, between you and Jacob, I'm going to be out of here and only two people can fucking ask questions. But go ahead, go ahead. I'm joking. Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead.

[Marisha]

Just one quick thing. I know you were born in Belarus, so I know your parents are also not American. And my parents are also not American. So I was wondering from an immigrant's perspective, what you can speak to, especially when it comes to business. And kind of like I was talking about having that pressure on yourself.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah, I think, look, a lot of, you know, there's a lot of immigrants on this call. I can tell visually I'm making assumptions. But you know, what immigrant kids know is like, we have it different than American kids. And not that it's better or worse. And there's plenty of immigrants that are very American in their style, and there's very many Americans that are immigrants. This is a general statement. It is different. We live for our parents money more outside the US than people in the US do generally. And so. But at the same token, I had a mother. Again, I'm an immigrant. That didn't do to me what most immigrant families did. She didn't say that school was the only way out. She didn't think that how I acted was a reflection on her. She had her own self esteem. So I got very fortunate. But what I would say to all the immigrants here is, you're gonna have to find that place that I just delivered earlier. You could admire and love your parents the most for what they've done for you and to set you up, but you cannot live for them. And the second you stop living for them and you live for your happiness, you actually deliver to your parents. What they actually wanted all along was for you to be happy. They just think you being happy often times is good grades, good schools, money, the right husband, wife. But when it's all said and done, they just want you to be happy. And the only way for you to be happy is to not listen to them. Not blindly. Awesome.

[Marisha]

Since this is recording, I'll just go ahead and send this over to my parents.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

You got it. You send them over to me. I got, I got, I got facts for them. I got a couple backs.

[Moderator]

Thank you up next is Carlos.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Hey, Gary.

[Carlos]

My name is Carlos. I'm a media resident on New Era. So like Marisha said earlier, I'm in the same predicament where, like, I know on your social medias you post about a lot, like, the 28 being the next. The new 21, you know, but it's hard to not think, like, I. I gotta put the gas pedal on the. On the acceleration and, like, try to pick up my career because this is actually my first step into this, like, industry.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yep.

[Carlos]

And like yourself, I'm a sports interview. Like, I love sports.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Okay.

[Carlos]

So, like, I want to get into, eventually work in sports. So that makes it even tougher because sports is competitive.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yep.

[Carlos]

So, yeah, that's my question. Like, what mentality, approach would you take? And also, like, would you ever extend this program, some sort of. This program into your Vayner sports industry?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

With VaynerSports, AJ really runs that shop. And I don't know if it's going to ever get to the kind of scale that would allow this kind of program to go there. But I never say never. But at the end of the day, he's 1A there, I'm 1B. And so I can't necessarily speak to it as far as the first part. Look, I think this goes back to, like, being graceful to yourself. Like, what's the alternative? Couple things I want to break down in the way you asked it. First of all, everyone, when I talk about patience, I do not talk about complacency. They're two different words. I am patient, but I'm obnoxiously ambitious, and I go hard every day. So it's a balance thing, Carlos, you know what I mean? Look, I think perseverance and grit and all those things are gonna matter for you if you wanna break through, Right? But, you know, what's the mentality? The mentality is you are young. Like, I don't know what else to tell you. Like, you could be mad at me, but, like, you are. Are you as young as someone who's 18? No, but I'm fucking 48. And I. And don't forget, bro, real talk, I worked in a liquor store when I was 34. I love when kids roll up on me being like, yo, I'm late. I'm, like, late to what? I started this company, this company in another company's conference room because I had no money. VaynerMedia started in Buddy Media's conference room for a year, and then we moved to Sunshine Suites down in Dubrosis down in tribeca. And I bartered that rent by giving him services and, like, trying to do stuff for the owner. We didn't pay rent the first two years. Not because I'm crafty, because we didn't have money. And that was when I was 35 and 36, Carlos, so what the do you think I'm gonna tell you?

[Carlos]

You know, I already said it, like, straightforward and blunt, which I appreciate, actually, because at the end of the day, I've been trying to, like, with this program. That's what I've been taking advantage of. Like, just pressing the gas pedal and just not caring what people think. But just, like, you want to think about also, like, what's after the program, like you said.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah, of course.

[Carlos]

Get you to my next step, hopefully.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

If I get Carlos, if I'm you, you know, I have juice in culture, in sports. If I'm you, I just DM every single sports business on earth on LinkedIn and be like, yo, I just came from Vayner. I stole all the secrets. Hire me. Yeah.

[Brandon Towns]

Thank you.

[Moderator]

Let's go to Andrew.

[Jacob Jesma]

Question's a little more broad, but if you hoped that a Vayner employee, whether.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

It'S just like, the residency, someone here for 10 weeks, or someone here for.

[Jacob Jesma]

Like, eight years, what is, like, the.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

One thing you hope that they got out of it? That's a great question. That they contextualized that you don't have to work somewhere where you don't feel good. You know, my favorite thing about Vayner is it's shown people, either in the beginning or when they're deeper in their career, that there's a way to go hard but not be in an environment that makes you unhappy or anxious. I mean, that's the biggest thing, Andrew, that I want. I think the other thing is we're very good at contemporary marketing. You know, like, I want them to learn skills. A lot of people here learn skills. I'm very aware. I very much believe that a lot of you will learn more in these 10 weeks than you learned in four years of college. Cause this is real shit. Totally. And it's not only real shit, it's the real current shit. A lot of you have friends that work at other ad agencies that aren't learning real shit. They work at PR firms, the fuck you know? So those are the things that stand out, brother. Awesome. Thanks. Thank you.

[Moderator]

Next up, we have Alexandra. Hi, Gary. My name is Alex Berman, and I'm a PCs resident. So as I'm embarking upon my career journey, I would kind of love to Know like some pieces of advice or words of wisdom that you wish like your younger self knew that you could kind of like tell your younger self from what you know.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Now Alex, I think it's a very individual thing. Everybody here needs to hear some different things. Like for me it was that if I took the 22 year old me, actually I would say to him, bro, you're right about almost everything. But you have one huge piece of kryptonite and it's a flaw and it's gonna fuck you up. And it's called your inability to be canderous to people. Cause you like them too much. You're so gifted verbally and you're so capable of creating money in the future you're gonna be able to get away with not being canderous. Ish. It's gonna work 95% of the time. The problem is the 5% of the time is gonna fuck you up personally and professionally. So you might as well fix it now. Cause waiting to 45 like you're actually going to do to start getting better at it left you with 23 years of a lot of pain that you didn't need to have. And all you had to do was be a little bit more courageous and understanding. You're not Superman and you can't fix everyone. And people have to learn their own lessons. And there's a kind way to deliver that. That's what I needed, right? Alex, I don't know what you need. You know, I think a lot of professionals, a lot of you in this call, what you really need is what I've been trying to lay down in the first 30 minutes. One, do not let any company or any person dictate to you your self worth. Two, fight for scenarios that you like going to work. If you hate Monday, that's bad. Like you can't hate Monday. Everyone like you. Can you confirm like again? Because this is where things are subtle. You should learn how to get comfortable with discomfort. But that's different than hate. Don't get entitled to be like, Ah, 25 minute commute. This blows. That's some bullshit I'm talking about. You're anxious because your boss is a piece of shit. You can't hate Monday. And really Alex, like real talk, work and life is a very simple game of self esteem versus insecurity. I think people need to build their confidence at all costs.

[Moderator]

Thank you so much, that was so helpful.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Alex, what do you think is like your biggest vulnerability?

[Moderator]

Potentially probably that I can be a perfectionist. So I'm Always trying to do everything right all the time.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah, you've got. That's a good.

[Marisha]

Yeah.

[Moderator]

I'm my worst enemy.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah. I almost, like, want you to do something wrong on purpose just to taste it. Alex. No bullshit. I make like 17 meaningful mistakes a day. The end. Like, you gotta get comfortable with making mistakes, otherwise you'll always be lower middle management.

[Moderator]

100%.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

That's just fear. That's insecurity. Like, perfectionist. And people that say I'm a perfectionist or people say that they have imposter syndrome are just putting makeup on, saying, I'm insecure. So that's okay. We're all insecure. That goes back to like, were you over. Like, were you a good student? Yeah. Yeah. Like, you just got caught in that system where it's like, you know, and that's not real life. So start practice.

[Moderator]

Start external pressure.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Correct. Just start practicing now. Like, honestly, you've got to practice in, like, sending it in without your normal six more hours of fucking looking at it. Mm. You know.

[Moderator]

Yep. Thanks so much, Gary. You're welcome. I appreciate it.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Of course.

[Moderator]

Next we have Melody. Hi, Gary. Nice to meet you. I'm Melody. I'm a media buying resident on the Mondelez growth pod. My question is a little bit different.

[Diana]

But I know you've been emphasizing the.

[Moderator]

Importance of social and being at the forefront of that.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yep.

[Moderator]

So how do you think the social media landscape will change in the future? And what are some things that VaynerMedia is taking to continue to help their clients and brands stay relevant in the midst of it all?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Melanie, I'm not sure is the answer to your question. I think what we do better than anyone is we don't predict what's going to happen. I didn't know TikTok and musical LY were coming. Right. I didn't, you know, I didn't know that stories as a feature was going to become so important. I don't focus on knowing what's coming. I focus on moving very quickly when it came. And so what we do very well is we move very quickly once we think attention has shifted to a new platform or a new feature or new medium. You know, I'm aware that VR is going to come. Like, I believe that every one of you are going to market heavily in VR in your careers because you're all young, including some of the 30 and 28 year olds on here. And so what we're best at is we move very quickly when we think something matters, like a TikTok four or five years ago. And then we, because I'm a practitioner on it with my brand and my businesses, it allows us to scale the intellect and the best ways to use those things very quickly internally for such a big company like Vayner. And we're able to provide that insight and strategy and execution to our clients.

[Moderator]

Gotcha. Thank you so much.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Thank you.

[Moderator]

Oh, Diana.

[Diana]

Hi, Gary. I'm Diana. I am from Toronto. I'm a PCs resident. Super excited. I just want to first thank you so much for creating this program. It's been kind of revolutionary to just imagine like the. This new generation of advertisers who are coming. It's like pretty iconic and I'm super happy to be part of it.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Thank you.

[Diana]

And also like having Canada as one of the newer offices that you opened. I have to tell you, it's a gorgeous office and it makes me kind of think about what you were saying before in regards to how you started the first office with kind of like from scratch, practically from no office to what you are creating right now. So, like, it's pretty crazy. I'm sure you probably have had many amazing ideas and probably have had people told you something in regards, like, not every idea is gonna land or like sometimes you have to like kill your babies and not get too attached to your ideas.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yes.

[Diana]

Is there a way that you go about it that makes it a little bit easier to not get attached to like, your ideas and that kind of vibe?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

By wrecking. By wrecking. Recognizing that humility is the single most important trait for a leader besides conviction. And that if I get stuck on my own shit, that the world of merit doesn't care about my feelings. I'm just completely detached because I don't get to choose. I don't have the insecurity or delusion to think that I get to vote. The reality of the situation is the vote. And so, you know, how do I get there? By knowing that if I don't, I'll be out of business.

[Moderator]

Yes.

[Diana]

I like that. I also enjoy it because, like, that kind of connects to some of the maybe thoughts in regards to like allowing other people to like, listen to their perspective first and allowing them to give their perspective first and then you put your perspective second. But yeah. Thank you so much. It's one quick question. I know that gratitude is also like really important to you. Any practices that you practice, like on a daily basis for gratitude.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

I basically have a conversation every day of my life with myself in that. I can't believe I'm lucky enough that here is Another day that my parents, siblings or children didn't die. Pretty much every day. Diana. And so I think I've gone to the ultimate state of gratitude. And because of that, I stress and I have anxiety like any human, but it's so different than most people. I just don't dwell on shit, you know, I can't sit on shit because whatever I'm upset about is so disproportionately secondary to what I just said to you. And I think that most of the people on this call right now take that part for granted. I'm not sure it's so healthy that I think, you know, it was really challenging as a kid cuz I thought about it my whole life. I'm not sure it started in a healthy place, but I think it ended up in the healthiest place, which is really interesting. I believe that if I was a modern child, that my parents probably would have taken me to therapy because it was such a big thing in my life. I was petrified of my parents dying because both my parents lost a parent very young. I've come to realize my mom lost her mom at 5. My dad lost his dad at 15, 16. So it was just always in the air and I think I internalized it. I love my mom so much. And then later I got to spend more time with my dad and I love him so much. And I think that it started off not healthy and ended up making me completely unstoppable, you know, it's pretty interesting to think about, period.

[Diana]

Thank you so much, Gary.

[Moderator]

Brandon.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Hey, Gary.

[Brandon Towns]

I'm Brandon Towns. I'm a PM resident on Kimberly Clark under Christina Braxton. Matt Garcia as an svp. First of all, I want to say thank you so much for coming to the Vayner Noir event. Last month I got together with Steph and Bri. It meant a lot. With that being said, as the. As DEI is being beginning to disappear in many places in the industry, how are you ensuring Vayner is continuing to hold space for black and white brown folks?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

By having dinners with Brit and talking to her every day to make sure it matters as much as making sure we make payroll. You know that it is crazy, brother. It's. I care about DEI and I for only two reasons. One, because I do not understand how people don't understand that different perspectives. I mean, look at this screen. It's crazy. This is amazing. Like people are gonna have different looks and different angles. It's just. It's good for business. And two, I also subconsciously got very lucky. You Know, I grew up with so much diversity. I mean, I went to Martin Luther King elementary School, I went to a 92% black college. So I Black and Latino college. I got lucky in hindsight that it was just around me and I didn't even see the world any different. But just effort, my man, just effort. You know, the six hours that I've spent with Brit in the last two weeks on different things are six hours that most CEOs are spending on making money or you know what I mean? Like, just by. It's very easy to prioritize it. When you prioritize it, it's just like, why is our culture good? Because I care for it to be good. And my man, you may know this, like this industry does not do a good job of getting black and brown people into the industry. And so, you know, this residency program was, was very much knowing that I'm just taking anybody. You didn't have to go to Miami ad school. You guys all know people coming from all over the different angles, you all know. And so, you know, it's important. I just think it's important. And listen, it's a challenge on, especially on the upper levels because there are so few leaders in the industry. It's like I got to. I feel like I have to build it from scratch, you know, and that's why this shit matters.

[Brandon Towns]

Thank you so much. I feel really welcome. Vayner. I've never worked anywhere like her before, so I see your effort and I appreciate it so much.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Thank you.

[Brandon Towns]

My friend and I asked a question that's unrelated to Di. If something cast trapped to happen and social media and Internet disappear tomorrow, how would you adapt to the new normal?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Well, if the Internet and social media disappeared off the face of the earth, selling shit in advertising would be the last fucking thing on my mind. Just to give you the preview, if that shit happens, there's gonna be straight anarchy. It's gonna be crazy out there. Like I'd first like go to my parents house and dig up my gun that I buried back there because shit's gonna get wild if that happens. But if you're saying it from a different angle, this agency will only forever be focused on attention, not social media. When social media looks like television and print in the future, there'll be a day where we'll be at the forefront of VR while everyone's still trying to do social media. And I'm going to be the guy at 62 yelling at all of you, saying the fuck are you doing social media for? That Shit's overpriced, it's whack. You got to do this VR stuff. And so I'm unemotional about the platforms. I could give a about social media. I care about where human attention is and that's what we live on.

[Brandon Towns]

Thank you so much.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Of course.

[Tanvir Oila]

Thank you. Brandon. Hi, Gary. First of all, very, very excited to finally meet you. Emit you. Thank you, thank you so much for, you know, first of all, like having the residency program. Very, very grateful for the opportunity. I'm Tanvir Oila, I'm a media resident at comcat podcast. I have two questions. Just one question is a very generic question. I wanted to know in general, how, how do you deal with fear and the comparison in general on your day to day basis, how do you stay authentic in that sense?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

First, by not deploying it on anybody around me. So I think one of the most terrible things about fear is that it's the greatest virus of our time. It is humans greatest virus. That when people take on fear, they immediately try to deploy it on someone else to feel better. And so one of the things I'm most proud of is one of my greatest strengths, but also when it goes too far, one of my great vulnerabilities is I take on my fear and I don't express it out. What I tend to do, it's very rare for me to get to the stage that I'm going to take, tell you, but occasionally when I'm at the highest point of fear or concern that I can get to, I tend to just go home and just like sit within myself and almost like if I was like a superhero, I would like go into like a ball and it's almost like, you know how like snakes shed their skin. I shed my fear by deploying gratitude to myself in almost like a meditation state. And I've only done that two or three times. Every other time I'm just doing it naturally. As I'm moving, as the fear or anxiety comes in, I'm in parallel pounding myself to shed it. And usually that works for me. It never tips over. So that's how I deal with it. I don't think most people are like me. I think most people deal with fear by talking to their safest person, their mom, their husband, their best friend. I think that's nice. But what I'm very happy about is that we finally destigmatized therapy. I think the right way to deal with fear is to talk to somebody who isn't your friend or family to get it out because when you get fear out of your mouth, you feel better. And that's what I think people should do.

[Tanvir Oila]

Awesome. And just one last follow up question is I know your philosophy emphasizes a lot on the importance of hustle, you know, hard work and perseverance in achieving success. However, in the world, like where burnout and mental health issues are increasingly very like important, how do you balance and like drive for achievement with knowing that there's a need for self care and like well being? What advice would you give to the ones who are struggling to find this balance?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

There is no correlation of hard work to true mental health issues. I think it's been a bandaid conversation. Hard work is remarkably enjoyable when you like what you're doing and it's not when you don't. I think the world in the last 15 years has gotten this thing wrong. From the day I started talking about hustle or hard work, it always was connected directly to having a passion for it. People separated it and tried to weaponize it. And we've. A lot of people have demonized work ethic and hard work without the understanding of the enjoyment. For example, I demonize hard work in the gym. I do not want to do it, thus I would make fun of it or not like it. And so for me, the thought of working so hard that I would be upset is literally the reverse of how I see it. I see it as I work so hard because I enjoy it. It's my game. I got into all of those hours because I didn't want to stop doing it like playing a video game or like reading a book. And so I think the world is very confused. Mental health issues have gotten is a very complex issue. It's a word that's thrown around today. First of all, thank God we have it because there are many people with it. But I don't think anyone's confused. It's also been so loosely used that people today use I have a mental health issue for something that people 25 years ago said, I'm a little inconvenienced today. That's an extreme change of behavior. And so how do I balance it? By knowing the. There's no correlation to it. People putting pressure on themselves because they're insecure is leading to it. Not like if someone's insecure, they may think that I have to work 12 hours a day to make a million dollars because that million dollars is gonna show them that I'm good. That's not work ethic, that's insecurity. Our issues in the world Right now are insecurity and entitlement. You're talking to a DNF student. You know how much I worked in high school? Zero. Do you want to hear something insane? You guys are all pretty young, so this might still be quite easy to remember. I'm going to say something nice and slow. I need you all to hear this. This is not a hyperbole, this is not a lie, this is not a joke. I did zero pieces of homework in my entire four years of high school. I read zero pages of a book in my four years of high school. So I don't think you should work hard if you don't like it. I think the world's got this super reversed and it confused all of you. It confused everyone. Don't burn yourself out, don't even do it. People are looking at the cause, not the root. We created entitlement, which created insecurity. We are a global power. The world is unbelievably ridiculous. Do you understand that? If you're on this zoom right now, how luxurious your life is, but you're gonna focus on it not. Cuz you're gonna see a TikTok that says Gen Z can't be as successful. People are fucking as their parent. Like they are pushing bullshit on you.

[Tanvir Oila]

That's quite a thought. Thank you so much, Gary.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

You're welcome. It's really, you know, just to finish the thought, it's really fucked up. Like the thought that you work yourself into, it's work is a byproduct of what's actually inside of you. It's not the fucking root. There's only two people that work super hard. The people that fully love it and they'd rather do it. I was in the office till 10:30 at night last night because it's more fun for me than going skiing or doing karaoke. And then there's the reverse. The people that are so fearful and so insecure, they think just like getting straight A's in school by working 12 hours, it's gonna fix it. They don't know themselves. And what's really sad is it's convinced a lot of people that don't try. That's real fucked up. This, our prosperous society of the last 30 years has taught people indifference, and indifference leads to depression. If it doesn't matter, the fuck are you doing? All of it matters. Everything matters. Fucking eighth place trophies. I'm gonna be historically right as fuck about 8th place trophies. Just putting it on the right record will be heralded when I'm dead.

[Moderator]

All Right. Go ahead, Jimmy.

[Jimmy]

Hey, Gary. My name is Jimmy. I'm a media resident. I was on the Echo park team, but now I'm the Pearson team.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yes, sir.

[Jimmy]

And my question is a rather specific one regarding your ventures with Rezi, actually. Okay, so you graduated college in 1998, the same year Open Table was released, and then you created Resy 16 years later. And my question is, why or how do you think you won the New York City dinner reservation game? Because, like, from what I've heard is that like, people prefer Resley due to technology use and the fees, but like, there have also been like some people saying that because on OpenTable the reviews are rather public, whereas on Resi, it's private. But I guess I just want to ask, like, why do you think you won the New York City reservation game?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

The day we invented Resi, me and Ben Leventhal, we were having dinner on the Upper east side. And the first initial concept of Resi was to sell premium seats and impossible to get restaurants for a premium, just like first class seats on an airplane. We did it for about a year, a year and a half, and we realized we didn't have the right idea that it was fine, but it wasn't a big business. We also realized, and you asked such a great question, brother. What we realized, Jimmy, was OpenTable was getting old, both in its software and in the kind of restaurants that were hot, were kind of like. It was almost like it was kind of like social networks, right? Like the hottest restaurants in New York were like, eh, OpenTable's lame. Let's just do. They were looking for a different solution. So we had an epiphany in a boardroom that were like, fuck it, let's just make the best SaaS product for. Let's make a much better product than Open Table and let's go hustle our asses off. And I'll never forget I said to Ben Leventhal, who's the CEO, I said Ben, because I really had the Aha. I said Ben because he was in the restaurant scene for 20 years. He had a lot of relationships. I said, ben, if we get 100 of the next 200 best restaurants in New York City on Resi, it's over. And that's literally what happened. We just had the best places. We had the best supply.

[Jimmy]

Yeah, that's what like, because like, currently I'm working on building an app similar Resi, but in the nightlife industry space. And that's what we're relying on, like getting the best venues downtown that's right.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Once you get that, now the problem is two way marketplaces are hard, so you get the best places, but if you have no fucking people, then it doesn't fuck you. Got it. So you have to make sure you're creating demand as well.

[Jimmy]

Yeah, we're going to get like a lot of users on it.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Good for you. Good luck.

[Moderator]

Next up is Haley. Hey, Gary, thanks for talking to us. I'll try to make this brief so other people can go, but I was kind of. My question I thought of in the beginning. My hand has been raised for a while, but when we were just talking about finding that thing that really drives you, I really relate to. And I just graduated college in May and I've been dealing with this like existential crisis of not being able to find what that is. And I think vayners, I'm really lucky to work for a company like vayner because I feel like they really foster wanting you to succeed and wanting you to kind of find your niche, whatever that is. So I kind of would love for you what advice you would give someone or how to best go about finding that passion. And I think that for me it's not about a timeline, it's just like eventually finding it. So how do you think is the best way to go about that and how vayner can kind of. I could use vayner to my advantage in finding what that might be.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

So vayner is a place that's willing for you to like switch from media to like client, from client to analytics. So it's huge. So doing things for, you know, you can't be like too squeaky about it. Like, if you decide to go into project management, do that for a year, then you can maybe talk about like six months later. So you're in it for 18 months to your point, like, if you discover it by the time you're 35, you're gonna win. So that's like real and like, I know that's like crazy because when you're 22, 35 seems like a thousand. So if you keep that in mind and you use vayner in two ways. Being able to move if you feel like you haven't found it. And by being social and like doing things like you should be signing up for classes, like, you need to, like, people are like, I can't find what food I like. I'm like, go eat food. Like, if you were to ask me, like, how do I know, Gary, what my favorite food is? It's. I'm like, Haley, by eating shit. Like, you've gotta go eat oysters and sweetbreads and uni and tacos and banana. Like, you have to eat shit. Right? Same with this. Like, you should be spending. Like, people who really dwell or concerned or on the flip side are passionate, excited about finding their thing. Well, you've got to find it. So, like, cool. You have your day job at Vayner, but then join every club, everything that's here, the softball team to this. And then, like, push yourself. Like, go do a ballroom dancing class, right? Take a course on Coursera for, like, accounting. Like. Like, unless you. You're tasting, you don't know. You know what I mean?

[Moderator]

Yeah. No, that totally makes sense. And I feel very lucky that Vayner kind of fosters that culture, because I know a lot of other companies don't do that. So I feel like, yeah, just taking advantage of what I have at my fingertips is probably the best way to go about it.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Appreciate it. Jae Yang. We sold Resi to Amex four years ago, so I have no priority leverage. Sorry about that. Let me sneak one. I only got time for one more. Let's get one in real quick. Yep.

[Moderator]

Let's go, Gracie. All right. So I was just thinking, you know, we have a lot of pushback from clients sometimes here at Vayner, we talk about it a lot. And, you know, being personally in the spotlight as Gary Vee, I know it's probably a way different experience. So how do you handle rejection on a personal basis? I know that you said, like, giving no fucks, like, not giving a fuck is the key to do it all, but how do you really go into having that mindset? How do you build that?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

By knowing I don't have control. Yeah, right, Gracie. Like, I'm not the client on Pepsi, or I'm not the viewer of my video, or, like, it's all based on humility. This is so fun for me to say. I wish there was a God of humility. And she sat down right now and showed all of our scores. I'll bet my life that I'm the most humble person in here, but nobody would think that they would think the reverse. I think people do not understand how much lack of humility is running through their body. As if. As if you should be taken seriously. I love when people are like, yo, I should be taken serious. I'm like, why? I had somebody come in pretty hot from the creative team was like, my ideas are not being taken serious. I'm like, okay. I was like, are you on social? They're like, yeah. I'm like, show me. They showed me all their social. I'm like, I would never take you serious. You're horrible at content. Not because of my opinion, because none of your shit does anything. We lack humility. The reason I can deal with it, Gracie, is because I don't think I'm special. Even as Gary Vee now, the way my brain thinks about it is like, cool. That's what I've done every day before today.

[Moderator]

Right?

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

But today my idea or my thing might be bad. You know, the ability to deal with rejection is completely predicated on your relationship with your own humility. You'll love this one. I'll end it on this. Yes. I don't give a shit about other people's opinions, but I also don't think my shit's right.

[Moderator]

I like that.

[Gary Vaynerchuk]

Yeah. And I think the biggest thing I would tell you is I can tell you for sure. Many of you are incredibly over audacious without having done anything yet. And I say that not as a razz. I say that to liberate you and make you happier. You know, It's a good thing. Very good thing. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's a good thing, like, please have unlimited conviction. I hope one of you have my job in this company one day. I literally pray to God that I'm looking at the future CEO Vayner X. But you know, you gotta get there first. Gotta go. See ya. Amazing. Bye. Love you all.