Robbie Hoffman (7:15)

Thanks for having me.

Mike Pesca (7:16)

What we do on the show is I like to think of jokes as premises and arguments about the universe. I mean there's a way a lot of comedians look at jokes too, so we talk about it. And so for instance, I'll start with this. I think a lot of your humor, you tell me if you agree is pointing out or you being annoyed at the elevation of very boring or non exceptional people or statements into something that we're supposed to make a big deal about and Your job is to point this out and say, this is not exceptional at all.

Robbie Hoffman (7:46)

It's one facet of a million things that I do. And yes, that's become an epidemic in this country. Interesting. People are few and far between and. And that's it. You know, not everybody can talk, not everybody can do, can act. Not everybody. And we're seeing that. It's it. We're seeing the survival of the fittest, especially in a talk medium, something like podcasts. You know, I think why my podcast has resonated and we are the Too Far podcast is Patreon only. I have been demonetized on every platform. We're on Patreon, and doing well is because I take talk as seriously as I take any other craft that I do. I take talk as serious as I take stand up. My writing. I'm in two big television shows coming out. I took those very seriously. I don't just think I can do anything. I wouldn't go to space. I have no interest. I know there's experts who do space.

Mike Pesca (8:48)

Yes.

Robbie Hoffman (8:50)

And it's the reason I think we're seeing it fundamentally play out in at least entertainment culture where late night shows are, you know, empty. Late night shows, I mean, there's just. It's archaic because we have talk show hosts who do not know how to talk. And it seems basic to say you should have a talk show host who knows how to talk. But of course, we have people reading off prompters. If the prompter goes down, they're way out. And I think the medium of podcasting has blown up because the talkers have finally a place where we'll see if you can talk.

Mike Pesca (9:31)

Yes, the revenge of the talkers. But now with Instagram, it's the lookers too. It helps.

Robbie Hoffman (9:37)

Well, I happen to be a cutie.

Mike Pesca (9:39)

Yes, Wes.

Robbie Hoffman (9:40)

So you know what? I am a cutie in my own way. I am a cutie in my own way. We weren't sure how I would get through it, but there is a market for me out there now, which is very nice for me. For Hashem. Yeah.

Mike Pesca (9:51)

When you say you take talking as seriously as anything else, do you mean when you're going on a show and if you know of the topic, most of the shows you go on, I think are improvised or just they talk about what comes up. But you think about it beforehand. You think about, maybe this is a good word order. This isn't. I'm going to be interesting. You plan it out.

Robbie Hoffman (10:09)

Like when I'm doing standup.

Mike Pesca (10:10)

No, no, no. You say you Take talking.

Robbie Hoffman (10:12)

It's seriously. I just talk a lot and I practice it a lot. I do one or two podcasts a week. I'm certainly on the talk circuit. I take a dinner party seriously. I mean, there was a time in old books that I've read and I stopped reading in 2004, but when I used to read, you know, it was important to people how they sat people at a dinner party, right? This so and so would get along with so and so. I'm the same way now. You know, if somebody's at a dinner party and their story is not moving, I'm going to move it along. We're here for a finite amount of time. I cannot waste time. I mean, I realized this early that people were not good at stories. And some were good at stories. I had this friend in university who got into class and she came in and a half like as if she had this like huge story. And she was like, I went to fill the meter for the car and there was already a quarter in there. That was the story.

Mike Pesca (11:11)

That was it.

Robbie Hoffman (11:12)

I go. I remember snapping. I go, that's not a story. Absolutely nothing has happened to you. You get into class, you sit down, you shut up. Who hasn't gone to a meter and there's already five minutes. Like, there wasn't. It was so the delusion.

Mike Pesca (11:32)

Yes. Now, do you think that that's not a story? Because just inherently not a story and shut up about it? Or could you, as a good talker, if that was bothering you, would you gussy it up? Would you make it into a story? Would you use your skin? No.

Robbie Hoffman (11:45)

You just know there's nothing to gu. It's not a story. It's not a story. Sometimes I think of something. I'm so thrilled that I get to work in so many different mediums. I write television and I do stand up and I talk and sometimes I have a thing, and it's just a tweet. Sometimes I have a thing. It's a stand up bit. Sometimes I have a thing, it's a feature. Sometimes I have a thing, it's a script. A thing is a thing. You don't have to have everything. You know, for me, I think it comes off when you said, like, oh, I point out to me also, this is how I enjoy. For me, to complain is to enjoy. Of course, if I'm not complaining, something is awry, right? Something has. I could be on, you know, Jeff Bezos's yacht and find it too shaky. I mean, it's like I would have that's how I enjoy things is it could be perfect, but I'll see a crack and it's, you know, that's just how I enjoy it. Means everything I didn't mention is fine. Yeah, everything I didn't mention is actually great.

Mike Pesca (12:40)

This is a process of elimination.

Robbie Hoffman (12:41)

Yeah. So people are surprised to find how positive I am IRL in my life because they think, well, this is. I said, but everything I didn't mention is fantastic.

Mike Pesca (12:51)

That's right. Do you know how often you're not talking? It's actually most of the time taking into account sleep and just letting the other person talk. So take that as your endorsement. Robbie Hoffman endorses you by shutting up about your flaws.

Robbie Hoffman (13:05)

That's it. I barely talk when you take into account the time I'm sleeping. You're totally right. I'm what they call shy.

Mike Pesca (13:13)

Are you a shy sleeper?

Robbie Hoffman (13:15)

No, I. Thank God, sleep good. That's why I'm somebody who's on time and that sort of thing. You know? Something I revere about comedians. I love a lot of different comedy. I think when I started this, I might not have known, but now I like anybody who does it, you know, especially people who can do it well. But I like people who do it way differently than me. You know, people give Pete Davidson, somebody like that a very hard time. I find him just a delight. Is he doing much? No. Is it a joy of an hour? It is. I'm more on the Taylor Swift side of things where I work and do and try a lot. I'm putting out a lot. I'm always trying, I'm always doing a lot. And that really works for me. But I like the guys like Pete who do, don't do. It's both styles can work, right? And I like kind of. I don't know, I can appreciate something that's very different than me, but they're doing that good.

Mike Pesca (14:09)

So in your recent act that I saw a few days ago, when you criticize Taylor Swift's 30 songs, none of them as bangers.

Robbie Hoffman (14:16)

No.

Mike Pesca (14:17)

Is there a self critique in there?

Robbie Hoffman (14:19)

No. Because I love Taylor and there's nothing self. There's nothing deeper. I always wonder, like sometimes, maybe not even poetry, but sometimes a dead author or something, they're like, what did he mean by this? Like, we don't know. Maybe he just meant what the fuck he meant.

Mike Pesca (14:35)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (14:36)

Often I said what I said. Often I said what I said. And I clarify anything I said. I'm not pithy. I will go into a long reason of why I think I. You know what I mean? So there shouldn't be any. Oh, is this. If I'm talking about me, I will talk about me. You know, but Taylor, we're just such big fans of. And I think it's more of a commentary that, you know, kind of a more. A less obvious take on the fact that, you know, her music is better when she's going through heartbreak.

Mike Pesca (15:11)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (15:12)

Rather than when she's in love with, you know, an NFL ballplayer. So to me, it was kind of not the obvious take on it. It just. The music speaks for itself. And the music's bad. Her personal life is going well.

Mike Pesca (15:24)

What about you? You're in love. You talk about your girlfriend a lot. She talks about you on her show. You're addicted to the vape.

Robbie Hoffman (15:31)

No, I know, but I just bought Alan Carr's book, How to Quit Vaping.

Mike Pesca (15:35)

I know, but is it working?

Robbie Hoffman (15:36)

You have full blown. I haven't read the book. And you're still hitting the. No, wait, I haven't read the book yet. Babe.

Mike Pesca (15:41)

What about your laryngitis? You don't.

Robbie Hoffman (15:43)

You don't need a book to tell you the book. What is your vocal cord? Step one, order the book. Am I going to have to get you Alan Cars? How to. How to quit the Zin?

Mike Pesca (15:52)

No, I don't want to quit. I'm full blown.

Robbie Hoffman (15:54)

She started yesterday.

Mike Pesca (15:56)

I don't, I don't have. I don't have an addictive personality. I can quit whenever I want.

Robbie Hoffman (16:00)

You're addicted to me. It's very hard for me to enjoy the good. I think I do very well in a disaster. So that's why it was like Covid happened. I sold a show. Everybody was like, you know, Trump. People are freaking about, freaking out about Trump. It's disastrous times. I tend to do very well in disastrous times.

Mike Pesca (16:22)

You think you get calmer, you get calmer or the rest of the world falls apart and you just stay the same as you were as your baseline.

Robbie Hoffman (16:29)

I don't know. I think that I'm just wired to do well in depression era times. I think the way that I grew up juxtaposed with society on the outside of something more religious was just. And just growing up so poor that, that I'm like, prepared for that. Like, I think deep down I'm like, always looking at a room. Like, I would make this the nicest apartment alive. Like, if this was my whole life, it would be just like sensational because I am so used to that. So when I have more and stuff, when Things are going well. I do. I'm a little shakier when things are doing well.

Mike Pesca (17:16)

Yeah. They say a lot of Jews, a lot of people who live through the Holocaust, a lot of people who live through trauma, a lot of people live through the Depression are like that. Like, that's their comfort zone. And they go to many psychiatrists to try to point that out and unpack.

Robbie Hoffman (17:30)

Yeah, no, I try. And, like, I'm trying to get used to the good times, but for as many years as I. You know, I think if your childhood is so. It's gonna take me double as long. I have to really be in good times for a long time because it's not as potent.

Mike Pesca (17:46)

So you had nine brothers and sisters, and you first born in Crown Heights, just a couple blocks from where I live now. Then you. Then you. Yes. Then you moved to Montreal. You're very poor, and your parents split up, and your mother was trying to raise 10 kids on just welfare.

Robbie Hoffman (18:02)

Yeah, yeah.

Mike Pesca (18:03)

Trying to get to the dentist early and doing whatever she could to mitigate her circumstances. But some of that, obviously. Well, it all created who you were. But some of that is great fodder. And even though it was hard, you probably look back and say, not just the cliche of, oh, it made me who I am, but this exact skill that is very marketable and is core to my appeal to thousands of people. It's all because of these horrible things that happened to me.

Robbie Hoffman (18:31)

I mean, it can be. I know. So I have some very wealthy friends, I mean, who are able to speak from within that and speak to their own stuff. You know, Jerry Seinfeld grew up. Okay. And I. You know, he's one of the best. I don't think there's ever rules.

Mike Pesca (18:47)

Yes, you're right.

Robbie Hoffman (18:48)

I think it's how you play your deck. I don't. I am hesitant about rules, about growing up or whatever. Can you be good? Can you not? You know, there's a million Nepo babies now who, you know, they're fine. They're good. Like, what do you want? You know, I. You know, I mean, there's obviously Nepo babies that, you know, are not. You know, there's, you know, Jaden Smith is the son of Will and Jada Pinkett Smith. I mean, he's best friends himself, Jaden Smith with Justin Bieber, one of the greatest pop artists of my generation. His parents are the most connected. He's been making music, jaden Smith, for 10 years. Best friends with Bieber. His parents are the Smiths. Friends with everyone. And he doesn't have a single hit. I mean, you're making music for 10 years and there's not a single hit. Justin Bieber is sharing his music. I mean, that is unbelievable. So there's people like that, his engineers, his know how.

Mike Pesca (19:52)

Stand in front of my studio, I'll tell you everything. I know. Jaden can't do it right.

Robbie Hoffman (19:57)

And then there's other people who do very well with famous parents. So I don't think there's ever there's a rule necessary necessarily how you play your cards. I think it's tougher and tougher to play unfair decks.

Mike Pesca (20:12)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (20:14)

You know, I think poverty sucks. And I wish I didn't have to be talented. And I wish I didn't have to be so unique and talented. You know, I have siblings who are good, hardworking people and, you know, and they don't want to be public. They're private people. And I think they're entitled to a life of dignity. And I think that, you know, one of the only ways to get out if you're poor is like, because I had a friend tell me this. He grew up very wealthy. We know him, he's a comedian here. Very wealthy. Father's on a Harvard whatever. And he said, well, you're here. Yeah, we took a walk. And he's like, so you got out, like as if nothing. And I'm like, but I shouldn't have to be special. You didn't have to be special. You have two brothers who suck and they're fine. They have a house and the whole thing. You know, it's like, why do you have to be special if you're poor to make it?

Mike Pesca (21:05)

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Robbie Hoffman (21:47)

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Mike Pesca (22:18)

We'Re back with Robbie Hoffman of hacks and so many other things are your nine brothers and sisters. I'm sure nine of them, nine different stories. But have they achieved some level of success? Middle class?

Robbie Hoffman (22:29)

No, no, no, no, no. My family. Nobody is hungrier than the Hoffman's. My family has done very well. There's certain members of my family who want simpler lives. And I actually, you know, they live in Canada still. And it makes me happy knowing they live in Canada because they can work a 40 hour week, have the dignity of an apartment, maybe have a pet, have a bus pass. And here I just don't think that's achievable.

Mike Pesca (23:00)

Do you think Canada is better for most people, but the United States is better for you?

Robbie Hoffman (23:06)

Yeah, I mean, in entertainment, the us, you know, is king.

Mike Pesca (23:10)

But even, I mean, this is what many successful Canadians point out. There's a limit. There is not even just a cultural limit because of the tax code. They don't wanna make superstars. And the United States is for boomer bust.

Robbie Hoffman (23:22)

Yeah, there's no, no, no, of course, of course. This is the entertainment industry. You go, you know, if I worked in finance, I'd be on Wall Street. So I totally get that. But it is, you know, I think back to your original point. I think it depends, you know, the cards you play, there are certain hands that are easier to play and that even if you don't play them and you fold, you're still in an ice house.

Mike Pesca (23:44)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (23:45)

You know, with cards like mine, you have to play them. You have. No, we can't fold. I mean, I had to play whatever 2 and 4 I had. I'm taking the subway with my 2 and 4 and seeing what the fuck I can do.

Mike Pesca (23:59)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (24:00)

So, you know, I don't know.

Mike Pesca (24:03)

So of the things that mark you as an outsider, which is great for comedy because you observe the mainstream, you have, you're lesbian, you're poor, you grew up in not just Jewish, but chabad, which is very ultra orthodox religious community. And then you have the Canadian ness, which I don't wanna downplay. I mean, so many comics come from Canada and they say, well, we're American enough to get your culture, but outside of it, enough to comment on it. So probably all of those things.

Robbie Hoffman (24:34)

I've always been on the outside. Like when I'm in so many ways.

Mike Pesca (24:37)

Right.

Robbie Hoffman (24:38)

When I was living in Montreal, I obviously Came off very American. You know, in Canada, I was known as from New York. I'm an American. You know, my mother moved 10 of the Jewish Jews alive to Canada. I mean, we stuck out, you know, I mean, I have brothers in Regina, Saskatchewan. I mean, there's not a single Jew, let alone Shmuley, you know, in Regina, Saskatchewan. Which, by the way, they could pronounce Regina. It's the same spelling. But they go out of their way. They go out of their way to pronounce it Regina. Same spelling. Same spelling. Easy fix.

Mike Pesca (25:16)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (25:17)

Will not do it.

Mike Pesca (25:19)

So they could rename it Moose Jaw. They don't.

Robbie Hoffman (25:21)

I mean, there are a lot of choices. There's already a Moose Jaw.

Mike Pesca (25:24)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (25:26)

So it just. It boggles the mind. But I think that. And then when I'm here, people remember I'm Canadian. So it's always, you know, I've always been sitting kind of on a binary of two things. Yeah.

Mike Pesca (25:44)

When you say so one of the things you say that always gets a laugh from my wife is just demarcating currency. In USD. This cost 24 USD.

Robbie Hoffman (25:53)

Yeah.

Mike Pesca (25:54)

And to us, it's funny because it's. We don't expect it. But to a Canadian, everything will either be in USD.

Robbie Hoffman (25:59)

USD is like, yeah, it's a trauma. When things are in USD. It's just like 12 USD could be 65 Canadian. Like, you never know what the exchange is. Like, it's going to be bad. But I do remember it's always going to be bad.

Mike Pesca (26:14)

Right.

Robbie Hoffman (26:15)

It's always been never going to work.

Mike Pesca (26:16)

Out in the Canadian sphere.

Robbie Hoffman (26:17)

But now I go to Canada and it's like going to Mexico for me. I'm like, buying this, I'm buying that. But my father, we have an estranged relationship, but when I was a kid and we moved to Canada when he had the money, occasionally I remember a couple birthdays, I got 100 USD USD in one bill. One bill.

Mike Pesca (26:37)

Wow.

Robbie Hoffman (26:38)

I mean, it just. There's nothing like a hundo. There's just nothing like a hundo. You know what? Gabby laughs Because I like to keep actually the seller here. When she puts me on, she's mad. I live in LA and I get two, three. I mean, it's crazy because I do so well here, you know, this. But when she gives me 100. Yeah, I like to keep it in my wallet. I like to have 100 in my wallet. There's something like, again, it's that depression mentality. If this all goes, I have cash.

Mike Pesca (27:13)

On me, at least you're not sewing it into Your jeans or something?

Robbie Hoffman (27:17)

Yeah, no, literally, it should be my jeans brand should be 100. But yeah, there's certain things that just. You can't beat. A crisp hundred is just Chef's kiss.

Mike Pesca (27:28)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (27:29)

They just nailed it with the US $100 bill and Ben Franklin.

Mike Pesca (27:34)

Very uncontroversial. Like, probably the best or funnest of the founding fathers.

Robbie Hoffman (27:38)

I don't even know who's on it.

Mike Pesca (27:40)

Every single time.

Robbie Hoffman (27:42)

I don't know who's on it even. I just. I would have a little lockbox. I had a master lockbox, not a piggy bank, you know, and with a key. Put the hundo under my bed. Nobody knows what I'm sitting on. It was excellent.

Mike Pesca (27:59)

When you had it in Canada, would you go out and spend it and would they.

Robbie Hoffman (28:02)

You would get 150 Canadian for it. About. So I would wait for something that I wanted, and I don't know. It was just very depressing when I spent it. I just liked having it.

Mike Pesca (28:18)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (28:20)

My favorite thing about money is just having it.

Mike Pesca (28:22)

Yeah. So spending it. Does it make you a little depressed?

Robbie Hoffman (28:26)

If I have enough of it, yeah. I also like to spend, but I'm particular. I don't buy a lot. I buy specific, and I trade up a lot. You know, my first car, I bought for 3,600, and then I sold it for six. Then I took that six. I bought an old Porsche 21,000, took the six off. I got it for, you know, like 15,000. No car payment. Still driving it. It's amazing. It's a Porsche that nobody would want. Base model came in Porsche. People are like, you know when they get. And I don't care because it's a Porsche. Porsche is a Porsche. Porsche. I got it for $3. I have no car payment.

Mike Pesca (29:16)

How do you. I thought the whole thing about. You drive off the lot, it loses half its value. How do you turn a $3,600 car?

Robbie Hoffman (29:22)

No, because I buy used.

Mike Pesca (29:25)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (29:26)

Yeah. So no Porsche. Porsche. Porsche can appreciate.

Mike Pesca (29:29)

I'm talking about the first one. It goes from the first.

Robbie Hoffman (29:31)

The first one became vintage. It was a 1983 Toyota Corolla.

Mike Pesca (29:34)

You buy it with that in mind.

Robbie Hoffman (29:36)

It turned 30 years old.

Mike Pesca (29:37)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (29:38)

And I had a buyer for 9,000 who fell off. And then I just took the second one, 6000, because I got it for 3600, but it became vintage in the time that I owned it. So it. It was a car show. Show, officially. So that's how it appreciated. Because you just can't find it.

Mike Pesca (29:55)

Are you a Car person or do you?

Robbie Hoffman (29:56)

I've become a car person by. By de facto at first, only being able to afford an old car, then enjoying the tinkering lifestyle of having old things. And, you know, I feel like people are young at heart. I've always been old at heart.

Mike Pesca (30:16)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (30:16)

Like a trans person, they get all their surgeries.

Mike Pesca (30:19)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (30:19)

Like, you know, they get their bottom surgery, their top surgery. They look in the mirror after all this expended effort and money and surgery, and finally their body matches who they are inside. I feel like I'm gonna turn 73, I'm gonna catch myself in the mirror, and finally my body will match who I've been inside. My program will be on in the other room. You know you're not transgender.

Mike Pesca (30:44)

You're trans ageist.

Robbie Hoffman (30:46)

Yeah, yeah, a little bit.

Mike Pesca (30:47)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (30:47)

So the old cars actually worked for me.

Mike Pesca (30:50)

But then you also have a joke in the show where someone asks you, are you transgender? And so the first joke is like, people just are asking this, but then I think you come down a little hard on yourself. In contrast with your observation a few minutes earlier, which you gave to me today, you're a cutie. So which is it?

Robbie Hoffman (31:07)

I am a cutie.

Mike Pesca (31:07)

Is there something weird or are you a cutie?

Robbie Hoffman (31:09)

It's weird, and it's a cutie.

Mike Pesca (31:10)

Is the weird hot?

Robbie Hoffman (31:11)

Weird hot? Weird hot is in.

Mike Pesca (31:13)

Okay.

Robbie Hoffman (31:14)

Weird hot has always been.

Mike Pesca (31:15)

What's your version of what? The rat guy? You don't know?

Robbie Hoffman (31:17)

I don't know. I don't know who the rat guy is, but weird hot has always been in. I was. I was with a couple comedians. We were at, like, a comedy festival, and we ended up hanging out in one of my friends hotel rooms. A bunch of the girl comics, and we were all just, like, kikiing, having a good time, and one of my friends said, she slept with an old fat guy. She's smoke show. Both of these girls were just so hot. She was like. And she was like, yeah, she's been sleeping with this old fat guy, and it's been really hot. And the other friend goes, I want to sleep with an old fat guy. Like, it's just sometimes if you're in a mood for weird hot, you're in a mood for weird hot. I think I hit that. I'm not an old fat guy.

Mike Pesca (32:08)

Right.

Robbie Hoffman (32:08)

But I hit something for some girls that is, you know, and do you.

Mike Pesca (32:15)

Think that's always been. Or, like, did you luck into, I don't know, changing the zeitgeist or taste or something like that?

Robbie Hoffman (32:22)

I've. Listen, you know, I equated it. Listen, I got no dick, right? So I'm good at talking. I can text, you know, it's kind of like your senses. Like somebody who can't see smells very good.

Mike Pesca (32:33)

Right, right, right.

Robbie Hoffman (32:34)

My senses, I've been, you know, I've been okay with in that department. Thank God.

Mike Pesca (32:41)

Although. And this leads me to something I wanted to ask. I was listening to your girlfriend's show, and she was talking about. And I had to look up what this was, that you have acquired a packer.

Robbie Hoffman (32:53)

Mm.

Mike Pesca (32:53)

Did you know she talked about this?

Robbie Hoffman (32:56)

No idea.

Mike Pesca (32:56)

Okay, so here we go.

Robbie Hoffman (32:58)

So I'm learning right now.

Mike Pesca (33:00)

Right. So a packer is a little mini appendage. And she talks about when she goes out to the club, she likes to grind. Grind against you. Okay. I have no Packer specific questions, unless you want to fill me in.

Robbie Hoffman (33:11)

Okay.

Mike Pesca (33:11)

My question is more about lines. And do you each. Since you do comedy and she's out there doing podcasts, do you have to check in with each other afterwards or.

Robbie Hoffman (33:20)

Do you have any reasons for it?

Mike Pesca (33:21)

I don't care. You don't care.

Robbie Hoffman (33:22)

We don't care.

Mike Pesca (33:22)

Did she say anything on her show that would piss you off?

Robbie Hoffman (33:25)

No.

Mike Pesca (33:26)

No.

Robbie Hoffman (33:26)

And if it did, I would tell her. Who cares? Yeah, I mean, it's okay to be pissed off. I also think, like, it's okay, you know, people are. I think we're moving past this, but this idea of people being offended and whatever. I don't think being offended is that bad. I think, like, I don't know anyone who expects to live a life not being offended, you know?

Mike Pesca (33:45)

Right.

Robbie Hoffman (33:46)

I just don't think being offended or pissed off is that bad. You're not in Gaza. Calm down. Like what? Like, it's not.

Mike Pesca (33:51)

And their problem is an offense.

Robbie Hoffman (33:53)

Yeah, it's just like, there's so many. Like, I accept life with the full rainbow of life that I'm, you know, happy and sad and excited and nervous and sometimes pissed off and sometimes elated. I think you need the entire stew. So I don't think. Let's say she pissed me off. Okay.

Mike Pesca (34:19)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (34:19)

I don't. Nothing is. I'm not expecting not to ever be pissed off.

Mike Pesca (34:24)

So this actually fits in with what we were talking about earlier. Conversation and people being.

Robbie Hoffman (34:30)

As you're talking about packing. All I see is unpacking in that unpacking profile.

Mike Pesca (34:36)

Oh, yeah, the word unpacking.

Robbie Hoffman (34:39)

I should just take my packer out.

Mike Pesca (34:41)

You could do packing videos, right? An unpacking video. That would probably sell pretty well. That could be for Patreon subscribers. Yeah. Yeah. So early on, we were talking about how just people are boring and they don't bring any conversational skill or think they need to. And I was thinking about this, and so the etymology.

Robbie Hoffman (35:01)

And by the way, I love boring people. This is the thing. I don't hate anyone. I just. Whoever you are, be you.

Mike Pesca (35:07)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (35:08)

I just like people when they're people. I don't think I don't have a definition of boring except for somebody trying to be who they're not, trying to who they're not. Something. There's a dissonance, and that's where the bore comes in.

Mike Pesca (35:21)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (35:21)

I think I love boring, or what people would consider boring people. I don't even know that. It's just. It's awkward. Yeah. Even though I complain about all these things again, I also love everything simultaneously. I hate and love equally.

Mike Pesca (35:39)

I probably mischaracterized what you said. You don't talk about boring people. You talk about our national or international personality deficit.

Robbie Hoffman (35:47)

Right. Yeah. There's a bad personality disorder that's taken over the country and a lot of people have bad personalities, but we don't talk about it. I think it's actually symptomatic, these foodies. It's symptomatic of a larger issue going on in this country that nobody is talking about. Nobody is talking about it. Millions of people being affected, millions of people being untreated, undiagnosed. But Zero personality disorder has become an epidemic in this country. It's the reason we have white people rock climbing and white people slacklining in the park, balancing on a string between two trees, 33 years old. Have you seen this? But it's sad, the suffering. And my heart goes out. It really does. It really does. What we've started doing with personalities is attributing to all the people with interesting personalities. They now have add, adhd, neuroad. They have all these things. Right. When it's just. We forgot that people have various personalities. I don't know where the word personality went, but it went away. It was replaced by neurodivergent type of diagnoses and, you know, regular people who, you know, we just. We stop. We forgot that some people have bad personalities.

Mike Pesca (37:34)

Yeah. Because when we talk about personality, when someone with expertise talks about personality, the word that always comes next is disorder. Right.

Robbie Hoffman (37:42)

I know.

Mike Pesca (37:42)

Like here, what's wrong with your personality? No one just celebrates, well, this guy's got a good personality.

Robbie Hoffman (37:48)

I know some people have just a great Personality. Some have a bad. I'm like, bad, like, people who. And it's funny because people go, don't I always. You know, my joke about the personality was like, you know, that's why we have white people rock climbing or white people slacklining in the park, you know, because slack line, you know, because bad personality disorder has become, you know, I. But the truth is, I rock climb, so people are mad that I rock climb. And I'm like, I'm joking. Like, it's always amazing when people think that, like, I'm the news that, like, that we should be like, we are. We have any factual basis for anything we say. It's like, the news isn't even real anymore yet. You want me to be real. The news is not fact checked. I'm fact checked. Like, it's just like, people hate when they're like, don't you rock climb? I'm like, yeah, I love it. And they're like, but you just. I said, yeah, I'm joking. Everybody here but me has a personality. Obviously, that's not true, but do you lead with them?

Mike Pesca (38:52)

Will you tell people rock climbing stories if they weren't interested beforehand? You know, not to do that.

Robbie Hoffman (38:57)

I found out I've never done that. Right.

Mike Pesca (39:00)

I know that you. I didn't know that you rock climb, even though I've heard you on dozens of podcasts. Because you understand what it means to be.

Robbie Hoffman (39:06)

Yeah, no, I don't need to hear about somebody's workout, per se.

Mike Pesca (39:09)

Yes.

Robbie Hoffman (39:10)

That said, I've started working out. I mean, I don't mind telling somebody that, but no, I just. This all comes very natural to me.

Mike Pesca (39:20)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (39:20)

These are not thought. Like, this is not. I'm not thinking about. I remember when I was straight, I would go out with a guy, like, and I would remember being so nervous with my friends before. Like, what am I going to talk to this guy about? Like, suddenly with my friends, we were all funny and all, but I would get alone with a guy, maybe 16 years old, 15, 14, I don't know. And I would write topics like, I can talk about this. Like, because I literally was so nervous to be with a guy alone because I had no interest, like, that I would have to think of things to talk about because I was so bored out of my goddamn mind that I'm like, how am I gonna sit with this guy for two hours? So I would immediately try to get the handjob as soon as possible just.

Mike Pesca (40:12)

So as not to cover up all conversational.

Robbie Hoffman (40:15)

I have nothing to say to this boy. Like I have Nothing.

Mike Pesca (40:19)

Are these 16 year old yeshiva kids from Montana.

Robbie Hoffman (40:22)

They're not yeshiva, but they're like, you know, nerd, whatever, nice boys. And I'm just like, take your pants off and you know, I'm gonna hand rape you now. And basically, you know, they can't say no, no, they were, they were hard as you know, it's two minutes and then I would, it would cut the time because after that I'm going home. I don't want to be here with you sitting in that disgusting mess. So. But these guys, these kids were always kind of in love and it was, yeah, they were always very in love. And I used to think I was so mean to love interests because I would be like, why are you crying at my locker? Like, I'm like this guy, I'm like, no, do not talk to me at school. I have no interest. Okay. And then with girls, I'm like the kindest, most romantic. Like I realized these poor guys that were in love, it's like a. Guys have a sick thing where they want somebody who doesn't want them.

Mike Pesca (41:20)

Uh huh. Women don't want that. I thought women want.

Robbie Hoffman (41:23)

I've never been into people who don't want me, which is good. I do know dykes who like to go for a straight girl or something like that. I've never liked to be predatory or feeling like somebody's not into me. I want somebody into me and I want to be in the person. Like I just, I like being into each other. I like that feeling. But yeah, the guys in high school who were so kind and I would just maybe give them hand jobs, they would know, like to keep the chit chat slow, to keep it, to keep it low. And that's what we were doing. But I would have to think of things to talk to them about because I, it didn't come natural. And over time as I became comfortable, even though talk was always natural. So yeah, these are not things I think about.

Mike Pesca (42:14)

When I said I mischaracterized your description of our national personality deficit. You're right. You never criticize boring people. If boring people are boring and more or less know it. And don't try to adopt some personality that's more elevated. That's fine with you.

Robbie Hoffman (42:32)

I love people who are themselves.

Mike Pesca (42:35)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (42:36)

Like that's something I really, I love. I think always be the most you.

Mike Pesca (42:43)

Yeah. And I think, and tell me what you think of this.

Robbie Hoffman (42:46)

But it's hard, it takes time to do that too. So I'm not, not out of the Gate. Everybody has to have themselves figured out. I mean, we're all on different. I think it takes the amount of a life to figure out a life.

Mike Pesca (42:56)

Yeah. Because we all get pushed or rewarded. The stimulus that we get as animals interacting with each other dictates what the next interaction's gonna be. So I do think society is probably not doing anyone a favor by kind of giving the message that here are some. Here are some topics of conversation that are gonna go well or even. And I know you're attuned to this. Here are some phrases to use in your conversation to make more interesting. Like talking about my truth. I mean, this is like another. Yeah, this is like another joke you have was like, you know, this is just true for me. And your observation was, well, of course it's true for you. That's what we're doing. Conversation.

Robbie Hoffman (43:37)

Yeah. Like, you're going to. Yeah, you're going to talk about you.

Mike Pesca (43:39)

Yeah, yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (43:40)

And I'm going to talk about me.

Mike Pesca (43:42)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (43:42)

That's how this is going to go. I'm not. I don't know your shit. You don't know my shit. So let's tell each other each other's shit. That's kind of conversation. You know, it's this other idea that the world doesn't revolve around you. I think you were getting to that. These are things I heard. Sometimes they would say, the world doesn't revolve around you. And I would just be sitting there, like. But it literally does. I am only on the vantage point of my two feet. Everywhere I look, I can look around. I can still only look out from my eyes. Our world's literally quite like if we're a protractor in math. You're standing on the feet of your protractor. And you can look around, but you can still only ever see from your vantage point, from your perspective. So the world does revolve around you, and it revolves around you and you and you. It revolves. That's the whole thing. You have your own world. It collides with another world. And we have Venn diagrams that go. And so we're gonna share our worlds with each other. But I don't like to be assumed to know yours or you assume to know mine.

Mike Pesca (44:55)

Right. And so this is a point of conversation that I think people are forgetting. And you're pointing this out, you know, comes from the word. Or a related word is converve, which is to try to change someone. The reason we converse is to some extent to convince them to tell them, maybe even Not. Maybe even not to win them over, but just here's my point. And now you're different, and now you're convinced, and we've begun to apologize for that in a big way. We're going to converse, and we might disagree, and I might actually change your mind. I'm not sorry about that. I think I've done you a great favor.

Robbie Hoffman (45:28)

Yeah. I'm just so comfortable, I think, growing up in. In close quarters with nine other siblings, my great uncle Eddie and my mother. I think, may he rest in peace. I think that I'm just so comfortable disagreeing and existing.

Mike Pesca (45:46)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (45:47)

It's just. It to me, is not a. It's. It just is like, you know, I think rich people. I've talked to this to some extent, but I'm sure not to your audience, but I think that rich people, maybe they had their own room growing up, so maybe two sisters or brother and sister had a fight and they disagree or whatever, and they don't want to talk anymore. They go into the room and they close the door. I shared a room with some of my sisters, so it's like, you know, whatever the bitch has to say, I got to sleep with her. You know, it's like, at certain point, we're not. There's nowhere to go. You know, my mother. You know, our phone was in the middle, like, hallway of the. Of the house. So it's like we had one phone there. And if my mother was crying on the phone because, you know, I don't know, some. Some horrible financial thing, we'd be like, ma, is it not going well? Like, you know, it's like we didn't get to not know anything. We just lived among conflict and got comfortable with it. And I'm fine disagreeing. One of my brothers, Schneer, is pretty. Is very homophobic, but loves me. I think it can be true. And it is true, because that's my experience. We speak often. He calls Gabby toots. He doesn't like it, but he loves us. Like, I don't know. We don't cut people off either. We all just let and let live. I don't know. I don't find it. It's easy for me to disagree. I think rich people cut each other off more. So, like, you disagree with me, and my father's a Republican, and this, like, we just didn't have. There's no cutting off. I was sleeping in a bed. Right. Like, that's it. So I don't mind disagreeing. And I think where that's hard for people is I can lean into confrontation, I can lean into argument. I love discussing and I love differences. So I actually, yeah, it's. For me, it's become a point of value.

Mike Pesca (47:52)

Do you ever try to convince Schneer about something about the validity of. Well, he's homophobic. Try to convince him off that or just live your life and be yourself and hopefully he gets there.

Robbie Hoffman (48:02)

No, I don't even care if he gets there. I don't care.

Mike Pesca (48:04)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (48:05)

If he likes gay people. We don't. I don't give a fuck. Like, who cares? I just. I don't care what he thinks. I just like who he is, but I don't care if he gets anywhere or doesn't. I want him to live in dignity. I don't want him to hurt people. Obviously his own opinions are his opinions, but he's been limited by his life experience and, and he loves me. And I just. Listen, it's not a great answer, but it's just this thing that's like. It just is what it is. I don't have any opinion about how he should be or shouldn't be. I just want him to be healthy, happy. I want a baseline for everyone.

Mike Pesca (48:46)

So if you're comfortable in conflict, when does that not work? When are there. What are the characteristics of a conflict you had where there was bad feelings or where things did fall?

Robbie Hoffman (48:58)

It does happen. Listen, it happens. I think I have, you know, I think when people are not good with it. I think people who haven't had long term relationships, you know, whether, first of all, I have nine siblings. I speak to six of them. Three and I. We don't get along, but six is still some pretty fundamental long plus 30 year relationships. I have friends from childhood. I have new friends from last year. I'm people who, who don't get used to the ebb and flow of a relationship. Be it romantic, be it friendship, be it familial, that. That's when it becomes too much. They find conflict to be assigned for. You know, obviously there can be, first of all, violence. I don't talk to my father because. Conflict. He's violent.

Mike Pesca (49:45)

Yeah, yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (49:46)

So that's a line for me. I can't tolerate any violence. But. And you know, and that can be. If my brother Schneer was spewing hate speech all the time, I would be sick of it, you know, but we kind of keep to ourselves on some of these things.

Mike Pesca (50:01)

Naira's one of the six.

Robbie Hoffman (50:03)

Yeah, he's wonderful. So it's funny, I just sent him a nightstand because he lives, like, he's very neat, and he lives in an apartment with, like, you know, his bed, his couch. And he said, what am I gonna do with a nightstand? I said, you're gonna use it. Okay. You don't need a cup of water. I don't know. You put a nightstand. You'll put your phone, you'll put a book, your Jergens. I don't know if you jerk. I don't know. You never heard of a nightstand. But it's like. It's like getting him. And then he sent me pictures. He's loving the nightstand. Never lived with a nightstand. Like, you know these people. It's so little for them. At first, he's like, what am I gonna do? Like, he's mad. And I'm like, just take. Just say thank you.

Mike Pesca (50:42)

Right? There's also only one answer to what am I gonna do with a nightstand? He's not literally metal.

Robbie Hoffman (50:48)

I'm like, what do you. You go to the bathroom, you brush your teeth, and then you're in bed. Like, what is. What is your life that he's either out of bed or he's in bed. Like, there's no book. There's no. There's nothing around the bed. Like, it's just need somewhere to put. And it was like a fight to get him. And then two weeks later, I was like, so, any update on the nightstand? Sent me three pictures. Like, love the nightstand. And I sent him one that had a plug in it for his phone. He's like, plug is excellent. I'm like, see? Like, what was he bending? Like? I'm like, these are simple. It's not even a money thing for him. It's just. He doesn't think of a nightstand.

Mike Pesca (51:27)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (51:28)

Let alone gay people. Like, let alone. You know what I mean? He doesn't think of a nightstand.

Mike Pesca (51:32)

So gay people in nightstands are similar to what am I gonna do with the gay people?

Robbie Hoffman (51:36)

He's as ignorant with a small table. He probably has been in Walmart many times and seen nightstands and been like, what retards are using these tiny table? Like, to him, a table is to eat, so you have a table. Like, he's never even evolved, and he's just. I love him.

Mike Pesca (51:55)

It just doesn't make sense to him.

Robbie Hoffman (51:56)

It doesn't make sense to him. It seems extra. It seems like, oh, this is what gay people are doing. They have a nightstand. Like, everything is gay with him.

Mike Pesca (52:03)

So things that don't make sense to him. He puts it in category of gay.

Robbie Hoffman (52:07)

Yeah, he's like, ah, there's some gay shit. They have a little table now. And it's like. It's not like we didn't have night sense. I guess we didn't as kids. But I'm pretty, I guess. My mother had in her room, she had kind of a desk, but it was a cat. It was so close to her bed that she could put stuff on it. I'm trying to think of any room. We had bunk beds, so there was no nightstands when you were a kid. But it's like, imagine a nightstand so crazy that a nightstand is Gabby's. Like, why is he yelling about? He's like, he's returning. He's not accepting the nightstand. Like he's gonna return it to Amazon. I'm like, he's yelling at the guy. So I don't know. I don't even know how we got on that. But that's right.

Mike Pesca (52:53)

No, it's important that we did. His psychology is interesting to me.

Robbie Hoffman (52:56)

I know that we have to. First of all.

Mike Pesca (52:58)

Yeah, I have notes.

Robbie Hoffman (53:01)

Show you the nightstand.

Mike Pesca (53:02)

Okay.

Robbie Hoffman (53:04)

Okay.

Mike Pesca (53:04)

I bet it's a nightstand.

Robbie Hoffman (53:05)

We should post the nightstand because it is just.

Mike Pesca (53:09)

We should enroll.

Robbie Hoffman (53:12)

It's just. It's. Here it is.

Mike Pesca (53:15)

And if we go to Shneur's apartment, this is what we'll say now, because.

Robbie Hoffman (53:19)

He'S come to accept it, loves the nightstand. Here's him standing, and I haven't even.

Mike Pesca (53:26)

It's functional.

Robbie Hoffman (53:27)

I have it on WhatsApp too. He sent it to twice just to make sure I got. Let's see. You can cut all this, but no, this is gold.

Mike Pesca (53:38)

You understand? You understand what drives Patreon listeners.

Robbie Hoffman (53:41)

Okay. But anyway, I don't see it here, but he's loving the nightstand.

Mike Pesca (53:44)

Well, you gotta send it to us. And we'll just cut to a picture of the nightstand.

Robbie Hoffman (53:48)

Okay. I wish I had all the pictures of it because he sent me so many.

Mike Pesca (53:54)

So I do want to ask you, though, about when you were talking about conflict, and people aren't as good with conflict.

Robbie Hoffman (54:00)

Oh, here's the nice thing.

Mike Pesca (54:00)

Oh, yeah. Let's say. Let's say.

Robbie Hoffman (54:03)

Okay. And I had to tell him, it's in the middle of the soil. I said, you know, it's for next to your bed. You have to put it next to your bed. Cause now he just has it in the middle of the floor. He's like this small little gay table.

Mike Pesca (54:14)

This stupid table in the middle of the floor.

Robbie Hoffman (54:16)

And I'm like, are you retarded? But he doesn't like things. He's very clean and neat. So then finally, he moved it by the bed. But look, it's got a little light. So if he wakes up in the middle of the night, it's censored.

Mike Pesca (54:27)

That's nice.

Robbie Hoffman (54:29)

And now it's next to the bed. You see him standing? He's loving the nightstand. We should post this. What, he's single?

Mike Pesca (54:36)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (54:37)

And he doesn't. He's an incel.

Mike Pesca (54:39)

Yeah. It's hard.

Robbie Hoffman (54:40)

And this is the shelves I sent him. He finally put them up, but he wasn't sure that he wanted to put anything in them because he said, there's such small drawers on the top. I said, it's good to have for personal because he has a closet where he hangs his work shirts. But I said, but what about your pants? He said he likes to keep them in the duffel bag. I said, you don't need to live in a duffel bag. It's, like, neat in a thing. And I don't know. He just. He doesn't want to take up too much space. Even in his own apartment. It's his. I said, put it here. He said, where am I gonna put these shelves? So we look out for each other, but we don't understand each other's lives.

Mike Pesca (55:17)

Yeah. Well, that's definitely from how he grew up, with all those brothers and sisters taking up too much space. Do you have some of that, too?

Robbie Hoffman (55:24)

I do. I like small spaces also. I think we're all a little bit into small spaces, but I also can definitely get used to a lifestyle.

Mike Pesca (55:34)

So in the beginning of the show, you make a joke about P. Diddy, and then you reveal to the audience, no, of course I'm not in favor of this.

Robbie Hoffman (55:44)

No, I know.

Mike Pesca (55:45)

You don't say alleged rapist. Of course not. And I was wondering if you felt you had to let them in on it rather than just think.

Robbie Hoffman (55:54)

No, I just did it for another joke.

Mike Pesca (55:56)

Oh, okay.

Robbie Hoffman (55:56)

Because I let them know. Of course, I'm not. Because I like to say, the guy who came up to me. I started adding that.

Mike Pesca (56:02)

Yes.

Robbie Hoffman (56:02)

Because then I go. Because a guy came up to me and he said, you know, I also thought he was innocent, you know, so that's why I let them know.

Mike Pesca (56:09)

But I think a lot of the things you say, you probably don't quote, unquote, believe. I mean, this is what comedians do. They exaggerate and they play with ideas 1,000%. Yeah. But the only reason you do that with P. Diddy is because of that second joke that's there.

Robbie Hoffman (56:24)

Yeah, I Always do. Like if I think it's funny, I'll say it. So I level with the audience early on to let them know. But I also. It's because, you know, it's not for them necessarily, it's for me. I know I have something coming that was important that I revealed that.

Mike Pesca (56:40)

But then I don't know if a very smart audience member, an audience member wants to take it to this level, can then infer, well, these things that she said, these things that made me laugh or didn't or were perhaps crazy seeming or offensive. Maybe they're in the category of the P. Diddy joke. Maybe they're not things she literally.

Robbie Hoffman (56:56)

Yeah, I don't care.

Mike Pesca (56:57)

Like rock climbing.

Robbie Hoffman (56:58)

Yeah, I just don't care if they. I mean, I don't care. So what are you going to do with somebody who doesn't care?

Mike Pesca (57:07)

Well, the only. That's true, but the only consideration I think would be to have the audience. There is a calculation that some comics do not. To lose the audience, to have the audience on your side. So are you saying at your shows, when you sell tickets to your shows and it's a Robbie Hoffman show, you know, the audience gets you and is gonna be on your side?

Robbie Hoffman (57:26)

I mean, my audience, I have been. Word of mouth, I have been person by person. My audience rides for me.

Mike Pesca (57:39)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (57:40)

You know what you're getting when you're like, they are. They're wanting it. Like, I don't know. I don't. It's only growing person by person. And when you're signing onto this, you're signing onto it.

Mike Pesca (57:54)

When you speak about the audience in the abstract, you're always very complimentary, but at the time. Do you bully the audience a little bit?

Robbie Hoffman (58:01)

Never.

Mike Pesca (58:02)

No.

Robbie Hoffman (58:02)

Come on. No, I don't. This is how, when I rag on you, it's. I'm enjoying you.

Mike Pesca (58:06)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (58:07)

And I think it's like my best friend Carmen, when I call him a faggot, an incel. I love him. These are terms of endearment for me.

Mike Pesca (58:14)

But you also.

Robbie Hoffman (58:15)

My brother is an incel. I'm in my own flesh and blood. It couldn't be. You know, so. No, it's that, you know, I'm a six year old flirting, you know, where a six year old doesn't know. So they poke at and they have a little bit of fun at your expense, but not seriously. And if I ever do cross the line and I actually hurt somebody's feelings, I'm kind of quick to apologize because it isn't my intention. I think like I say, and people are starting to know this about me. I am opposite Ellen. You know, Ellen comes off as kind. She purports to be kind and nice. She's dancing. Right. But she's actually a terror to work with. People have heard this, right?

Mike Pesca (58:59)

Yeah, there's some documentation out on it. Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (59:02)

Well, I'm kind of the opposite. I come out aggressive. I am a little rough around the edges, but I'm actually a fucking delight to work with. So it'll come out one day that I'm kind. You wait and see. You wait and see. Just because I'm aggressive in this, this is a way to be kind, too. You don't have to be the fake nicey nicey, I'm generous kind. All the stuff, I think I have.

Mike Pesca (59:25)

This theory that people who put kind in their Twitter profiles, I don't know how you test it, Are probably less kind than they are.

Robbie Hoffman (59:31)

It's bizarre.

Mike Pesca (59:32)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (59:33)

Just because I'm yelling at you doesn't mean I'm mad. Just because I'm complaining doesn't mean I'm not enjoying. Like, there's nuance to everything, you know what I mean? It's just like, just because I'm aggressive doesn't mean I'm not kind, you know? Yes. When I give a homeless person money, for instance, like, I feel, you know, I say, good luck. I said, please. That's it with the windows. Take this and goodbye. That's it. And I see the same guy every week in la, and I go, no, I'm not in the mood. But here, come, please. My lights, my lights. And if he makes me miss the light, he goes, I'm sorry. I'm like, bro, you know, we have. We love each other.

Mike Pesca (60:11)

Yeah. You know what that guy needs?

Robbie Hoffman (60:13)

And I hate if he's not there. I'm like, I'm here today. Where is he? You know? But so there's different ways. There's not like one way to be anything. There's not one way to play your cards. There's not one role. Everything is everything.

Mike Pesca (60:31)

Yeah. I also think Ellen is definitely unlike you. Cause she's one of these people who falls back onto, you know, I was gonna say psycho babble, but a lot of psychology laden jargon and the phrases like my truth and these kind of boring phrases that paper over and excuse the interesting parts of a personality.

Robbie Hoffman (60:55)

Yeah.

Mike Pesca (60:55)

You know, I. I watched her special and she even did this thing where she claimed something about, you know, I'm just trying, I'm making mistakes, but I'm human. And Then she paused, and of course, the audience had to applaud. And it went on for, like, 18 seconds. And she has the cut on that. And, like, I thought that was the most indulgent thing it made. I don't. I like Ellen. I'm fine with her, but that just made. There's something about that that made my smile.

Robbie Hoffman (61:17)

No, Ellen's a legend. Ellen is a g. There's no question. You know, I think she's one of the greatest to ever do it. I'll say that. I saw that special live at the Largo, and it was amazing. She was a bit more fuckery, which I really liked. I know she's got this whole brand. She's still trying to salvage some kind brand. I wish she just went, fuck off. You know, I just wish she just, you know, for what we put Ellen through. You know, she comes out, you cancel her show. It had amazing ratings. It wasn't. It was just overt. You know, we hardened her. The industry hardened her. Then she becomes hard, and then we yell at her for being hard. I don't. You know, I think everything is a product of everything. So I still think she's a legend. I'm sure all the jimmies aren't any nicer than her. You know, I'm sure. You know, it's not accident that these people. Some of the people we canceled the most are black, are women. You know, Cosby needed to be canceled. There's no question. But you don't think members of the Catholic Church or the government. I mean, you don't think other comedians. I think everybody is just as bad as everyone. Everybody can be just as good as everybody. The people we decide to target are societally more excited. You know, it triggers something in people, I think, think, yeah, I think black people and women get canceled really hard. Roseanne got canceled really hard. And I think, fine. She also. You know what I mean? But I think I'm not excusing what any of these people do. I just think it's interesting to look at who has the biggest cancellations and who gets the forgiveness.

Mike Pesca (63:03)

Do you feel that your appeal.

Robbie Hoffman (63:06)

Like Puff Daddy.

Mike Pesca (63:07)

Go ahead.

Robbie Hoffman (63:08)

How many Puff Daddies are there? Thousands. You know, I don't think. And then Jews Weinstein went down. How many Weinsteins do you think there are?

Mike Pesca (63:19)

Right.

Robbie Hoffman (63:19)

I'm just saying that it continues to be the marginalized that are made the biggest examples. They are shitty. I'm not excusing, but there's a million regular gentile people doing this shit.

Mike Pesca (63:34)

A lot of people wouldn't make the distinction between Jew and gentile. It's just white. It's all white.

Robbie Hoffman (63:39)

No, Weinstein, Epstein. There's a lot of Epstein.

Mike Pesca (63:43)

And not because of what they did, but because they're Jewish.

Robbie Hoffman (63:45)

Listen, they deserve to go down the way they went down. They took a hit for many other powerful people. Bill Gates isn't going down right. Bill Gates is a hit on him. There's many people who can go down who we don't even know of. They're not necessarily on our radar right now. If they pop, but they don't. We need a fall guy every so often for these crimes that many people do. But most definitely, it's gonna be a black guy, it's gonna be a Jew, or it's gonna be a woman. So last thing, I think just pattern of who has gone down the hardest and then who gets to go up again.

Mike Pesca (64:23)

So the last thing I wanna ask you about is something that I didn't realize until I saw you live. And people listening to this will not get even. People watching this, you're an extremely physical performer and bend at very many angles. So. And you're friendly with or. I don't know if anyone's made the comparison. They probably have, since he's a huge comedian. But Sebastian Maniscalo, to me, you. Yes. And I think that. Well, I have a couple questions. He's a trained dancer. Does it just come. Does it come to you naturally? Or is it one of those things where you realize. You realize when you gestured funny, they laughed more. It's like, oh, maybe I'll do that some more.

Robbie Hoffman (65:02)

My body is operating on its own. Just like. I'm not thinking necessarily how I'm talking to you. I haven't thought any place about my hands. It's the same thing on stage. I might be, but my body is. So many of my bits are so visceral, I can feel them, you know? And I could. Like, if I do a bit about how somebody goes to the bathroom, I'm literally walking like them. The conveying of it. The girl on the airplane who closed the bathroom door behind her. I mean, I want you to see what the fuck I saw.

Mike Pesca (65:37)

Right?

Robbie Hoffman (65:38)

You know, And I just. It's. It's as if I'm replaying a movie in my head. Like, it's just. I don't have to think of it again. I know when I say that bit again, it's. I'm gonna watch the movie. It's like rewinding. And I see that bitch getting in the bathroom and I see how she's getting out of it. Like, it's not. I don't even have to remember a lot of my stuff in that way because I could see it.

Mike Pesca (66:05)

You're just telling them what happened.

Robbie Hoffman (66:07)

Like some things like that, the physical parts, I think that you're saying more impressions or whatever. I also come from a loud, talky family, physically. Talky family. Jews are not, you know, we have elbows on the table. We're not. We're not polite. You know, there's a lot of hand talking. There's a lot of my mother from across the aisle in the, you know, in the supermarket going, you know, shut the fuck up with a gesture. Just like gestures. There's a lot of talking. Like, you know, I think you have. So there's a lot of physical talking.

Mike Pesca (66:51)

Yeah.

Robbie Hoffman (66:52)

As much as there is. We use everything at our disposal. And maybe because I'm small, Sebastian's small, too. Maybe I just. I need to be louder or something. Maybe some kind. I don't know.

Mike Pesca (67:05)

Do you think if I watched your show five times, you would bend at the same angles every time for every joke in the same way?

Robbie Hoffman (67:13)

I know, I don't think exactly, but I think you'll get a lot of bending.

Mike Pesca (67:17)

At one point, it seemed to me, is she davening? I mean, you do a full top body bend all the time.

Robbie Hoffman (67:24)

Yeah, people have got. Listen, Gabby says. I'm always moving and dancing with Gabby, but I'm not like a dancer. She's a dancer. She, you know, Dancing with the Stars. I mean, she was an NFL cheerleader for five years. I mean, she's been dancing her whole life. But I'm always dancing and singing. I sing a lot in my day. I don't have the worst voice, singing wise, it turns out that's according to Gabby. But my dancing is abysmal. But I still enjoy to do it.

Mike Pesca (67:53)

Oh, and the last thing I want to ask you is, does anyone still. Does Schneer or any of your relatives, anyone still call you Rifka?

Robbie Hoffman (68:00)

They all call me Rifky.

Mike Pesca (68:01)

Yeah. Rifky.

Robbie Hoffman (68:02)

Yeah.

Mike Pesca (68:03)

And is that a different name than Rivkahla?

Robbie Hoffman (68:05)

Yeah, Rivkah is like my, you know, my given name. But Rifky is like the, you know, Robert, Robbie, do you want.

Mike Pesca (68:14)

Oh, I see. Right. More or less formal. When you tell jokes about your birth certificate and it says Robbie, is that just so the audience doesn't get confused?

Robbie Hoffman (68:22)

Yeah, I don't need. I mean, my mother, when I first went by Robbie, which is my uncle Rob's name. And that's why I took it, because I was, like, just starting stand up, but I was also working in an accounting firm, and I was getting paid every two weeks for the first time and loving the money. I was like, canadian money.

Mike Pesca (68:41)

But still.

Robbie Hoffman (68:41)

Yeah. So I wasn't about to, like, ruin nothing doing stand up because I was like, what could you know? So I wanted a different stage name. So my friend Steph, who was helping me make this show, was like, now's our chance to change your name, whatever. And I was looking for an R. I didn't want to change. Like, my initial felt really fast, and my Uncle Rob was in the family, and I never heard a bad thing about him. And so I went with, you know, I went with Rob, Robbie. And my mother was like, why? You know, it's such a beautiful Jewish name, Rifka, you know, like, why are you ashamed? As if I had shame. And I'm like, ma, you think within 30 seconds of me being on stage, everybody's like, I wonder if she's Catholic.

Mike Pesca (69:29)

Like, it's.

Robbie Hoffman (69:31)

There's nothing. There's nothing to hide. Like, you cannot hide. Like, there's nothing, like, nefarious going on here. It's like, I don't want to be brought up. And they're like, ravuka. Like, nobody knows how to say what the fuck you gave me. So it just worked in the end.

Mike Pesca (69:48)

Robbie Hoffman. Rivka Hoffman, if you will, if you are from Canada. Thank you so much.

Robbie Hoffman (69:54)

Thank you. You can follow Too Far Pod. We are Patreon only. We've made it affordable. $5. If you're too poor and you can't afford it, then you can't afford it. It's like, do not. If you don't have money, don't be splurging on Patreon.

Mike Pesca (70:06)

Right. Like, when you go to the Duane Reed and the toothpaste.

Robbie Hoffman (70:10)

If I was you 10 years ago, I wouldn't be spending on Patreon. It's not a priority if you have an extra five. Okay. But do not be mincing me to do this podcast. And I'm Robbie Hoffman on Instagram nudes and showed it. Thank you.

Mike Pesca (70:25)

Thank you. That was excellent.

Robbie Hoffman (70:27)

Oh, my God, I adore you.

Mike Pesca (70:28)

Oh, that's excellent.

Robbie Hoffman (70:30)

I adore you. You're an excellent interview.

Mike Pesca (70:38)

And that's it for today's show. Cory Wara produced the gist. Astrid Green is our social media coordinator. Michelle Peskas, CBSO of Peach Fish Productions. Ashley Kahn is co. CBSO of Peach Fish Productions. Leo Baum is our intern improve. Thanks for listening. The gist is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses. Monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations.