B (3:35)

You're listening to the Best of Glenn Beck program.

A (3:40)

Attorney General Ken Paxton, also running for the U.S. senate now.

C (3:45)

Ken, how are you doing?

D (3:47)

Great. Primary is just about over. Run up. It's just about over, May. You're breaking up, people. Get. Get.

A (3:56)

Oh, geez.

C (3:57)

Can you find a better place?

A (3:58)

Can you find a better place? Stop moving. Can somebody take him off the air, Sarah. And see if you can find a better place for him to be so we don't lose him in the middle of this. He's running for Cornyn's job. And remember, he said, if Cornyn would push through the SAVE Act, I'll drop out. I'll drop out. And Cornyn scores.

C (4:25)

Like, I want to do that. You bet I'll do that.

A (4:27)

He didn't do that. He didn't do that. We're still looking at the SAVE Act. Nobody's doing anything about it. And like I said, with Cornyn and, you know, his whole, you know, I'm gonna look, I'm gonna look into this Epic City thing until people stop paying attention to it, and then we're gonna drop it. That's exactly what Cornyn does. He's there now. Ken, are you there? We have a better connection. Yes.

D (4:52)

Yeah. Better.

A (4:54)

Yes, better. Okay, good.

D (4:56)

Okay, good.

A (4:57)

Yeah. So.

C (4:58)

So. So tell me, what is. Tell me.

A (5:00)

Tell me first on what's happening with this Epic City thing. The Meadows.

D (5:05)

Yeah. So this. This group, whatever they call themselves, they actually call themselves Community, initially known as Epic City, a Muslim development, actually, in my county, next door, close to where you used to live in Collin County. And they sued Texas Workforce Commission, saying that they were. That The Workforce Commission had agreed to certain terms and that they no longer were. EPIC was no longer committing any violations of fair housing laws. Unfortunately, for epic, more complaints were filed, and the Workforce Commission found more violations. And then HUD started investigating, and they're. They're now reviewing this whole Epic City situation. And then, of course, we. You know how it is in Austin, Texas. We have a liberal. Judge Amy Clark Meacham comes in and says, no, no, no, you. You have to go forward with this agreement despite these violations. You have to allow them EPIC to proceed with their. With their development. So we appealed, which you were discussing the little intricacies of the legal world. Our appeal stops for injunction until that appeal is resolved.

A (6:14)

So, good thing is, it's a 15th Circuit Court. What are the violations that you see?

D (6:21)

So the violations are actually determined by the Workforce Commission, and the initial violations supposedly were worked out. But the problem is there. There have been new complaints, and I don't know what the new complaints are. I just know that people have filed complaints with the Texas Workforce Commission. They're now investigating those complaints, and HUD's also investigating. So neither the Texas Workforce. The Texas Workforce Commission does not want to go forward with this agreement when there are other violations outstanding that have not been resolved by epic.

A (6:53)

So, Ken, for people who don't know, I mean, there's a lot of people in Texas, they don't understand that the entire culture of Texas is being lost and that Texas is a major target of an Islamist movement. I mean, this is how you have no go zones in cities all over the world. Explain this to somebody who's really not paying attention to what. What your. Your problem is or what people are fearing. This is. Actually.

D (7:26)

Yeah, I think it's interesting because it's. It seems like it's been over. You know, it started out kind of slowly. Now there are more and more of these developments that are exclusively Muslim. And supposedly Sharia law governs. Well, you know, obviously people have the right to worship how they want to, but they do not have the right to have their own laws. And one of the reasons we sued EPIC separately from this Workforce Commission issue is we felt like they were violating our state and federal securities laws. And we think there are other issues involved with how they structure the transaction that are legal. And we certainly think that they violated fair housing laws, which are not really ours to enforce, the federal ones anyway. But, you know, if you live in our country, you have to follow our state. State and federal laws, and you have to follow our constitution. You can't develop your own little community and then decide that you're going to determine your own laws that are separate and apart from the laws. Nation. And that was happening.

A (8:25)

Why are they, why, why are they so intent on, on building a Muslim community this size, especially in, in Texas? How many developments are there and why is Texas such a big target?

D (8:39)

Well, look, I mean, I don't know, but I mean, you can only surmise that this is a pretty important state, that if it doesn't stay strong, if it doesn't stay really conservative, if it doesn't stay as a Republican state, the country overall is be harmed by that and potentially, you know, we may not ever elect another Republican Congress or another Republican president again. And of course that affects the Supreme Court. So all branches of government that are controlled by one party, which I think is the ultimate goal here. The ultimate goal, whether, you know, through these developments or just generally the progressive movement in this country is to have a one party system where the elections are rigged. But they don't. No one says they're rigged. They just are rigged through mail in ballots and illegal voting and you know, no photo id, all the things that we're trying to do with the Save America act. And it looks like we're having fair election. Ultimately what the Democrats want and the progressives want is they want a one party country where most of the elections are rigged, but they never say they're rigged and they control the government through, you know, a few people. That's what they want.

A (9:41)

And it is the red green alliance. You know, if you look at, I was just on with Piers Morgan. I'm going over to Tommy Robinson's rally here in a couple of weeks over in, in England. And you know, this is what's happening to England and all over the, all over Europe and it's becoming a real problem. And I was talking to Piers Morgan and he just said, well, there's, there's not a real problem here. It's, you know, why, why does everybody keep single singling out the Muslims? I don't think anybody's singling out Muslims. You're singling out Islamists. 48% in a recent poll in Europe, 48% of those immigrants say they want Sharia law in Europe, that that's their goal, is to have Sharia law. You're running and I'm going to be encouraging every single person to ask their politician of this and if they answer the wrong way, don't vote for them. Don't vote for them. Ken doesn't know what I'm about to ask him, but I think it's going to be pretty easy. Will you support a nationwide ban on Sharia law?

D (10:48)

Absolutely. It's inconsistent with our Constitution. It's inconsistent with most of our federal and state law. And there's no way we can have a dual operating legal system in our country and sustain that. We will crumble and we will have serious issues like Europe is having. I mean, the foreshadowing is already happening in Europe. Right. We already know that. We already know how this plays out. So if we're not diligent in Texas and we're not diligent in our country, we will lose our country. We will not have our constitutional freedoms that our founders put in place.

A (11:26)

I was at the 911 memorial, the museum here in Manhattan this week. I think it was on Monday. I went in and walking through it, the thoughts of everything that this country is going through right now and what we're debating or not debating because, you know, you're forced into silence, is remarkable. That that was 25 years ago. And here we are.

D (11:49)

Yep. And the fact that we haven't maybe learned our lessons from that incident, you know, it's a problem. And, you know, look, I've spoken to Muslim leaders in Texas and I've said to them, you've got. You cannot expect us, the rest of this state, to allow you to push Sharia law and. Or even to be in a position where you won't speak out against terrorism when it happens from your, you know, your. Whatever your religion, you need to speak out against it and let us know that you're with us and that you don't support terrorist actions in our country, and you guys don't speak out when it happens. Enough.

A (12:33)

Ken, tell me about the race.

D (12:35)

The race is going well. You know, we've got early voting starts May 18th through the 22nd. We've got five days of early voting and the day after Memorial Weekend. So it's gonna be a low turnout vote. However, my opponent, $100 million in the first round to lie to them, to the Texas people, to convince him that he's pro Trump and he's pro border wall, that he's amnesty guy, which is all false. He's an open borders, you know, anti Trump guy. And he's running, spent, you know, $100 million to tell people that he's. He's good and I'm bad, and that I'm. I've adopted his positions, which is crazy. You know, some. I'm for LGBT funding. I'm for the transgender movement. You know, I let child predators off, you know, easy. I mean, just crazy. I'm not kidding. Look at his commercials. He has spent $100 million trying to convince people that those things about me. And it's ludicrous. And the things that he is saying about him are ludicrous. But look, this is a guy that has no record. You cannot find anything that he's accomplished good in 40 years. You look, Glenn, nothing good in 40 years. But he has money from D.C. that he's taken from Republicans to tell them, to convince Republicans here that, you know, he. All of these things about him are not true. And then he's. He's been a great. He's been doing a great job. He's awful.

A (13:53)

How the polling. How's the polling look?

D (13:55)

So the pulley's good, but I don't want to rely on it. Like, my polling is really good, like double digits. But I don't trust polling until. Because all that matters is what. Whether people vote.

A (14:05)

Turnout. Yeah.

D (14:06)

Yeah. If I. If I tell people on my head, I don't want them to be overconfident. I need people to vote. I need them to take their friends. I need to take their family. Because no poll means anything until they actually deliver and show up and vote. And that's what I need. I need votes. Yeah.

A (14:19)

Ken, thank you very much. I appreciate it. Thanks for being on.

D (14:22)

Thanks, Glenn.

E (14:23)

Have a great day.

A (14:24)

You bet. Ken Paxton, the Texas State Attorney General and candidate for the U.S. senate. This is the best of the Glenn Beck program. Emma Morris. Hi, Emma. How are you?

F (14:37)

Hello.

B (14:37)

Good morning. Thank you so much for having me. It's an honor.

A (14:40)

So you were at the New York Post and you get a call, right?

B (14:48)

Yeah.

A (14:48)

And it had to be surreal. Tell me about the call that came in.

B (14:53)

Yeah. So thank you. First of all, thank you so much for having me. And, yeah, so it's. I think, like, the context matters, too. Like, I was 20. I was 27. I had been working there for, like, six months or so.

A (15:05)

Crazy.

B (15:05)

Yeah, I was certainly under qualified. I think I probably got hired because I was a conservative with a pulse in New York City. And they were like, I guess she knows what she's doing. Okay, let's toss her the keys. And then all of a sudden, yeah, I get a call from Steve Bannon in September of 2020 saying, I have a story that's going to change your life. And I didn't know him, so this is, like, really random. And I say, okay, like, what? And he says, I have Hunter Biden's computer. And I was obviously shocked by that. I didn't, like, fully believe it. I didn't know what to Think. And they start to explain, you know, I didn't know Ben, and I was connected with him through a friend of mine who was working for him. And he starts saying he's addicted to crack and forgot it somewhere, and now we have it. And you're listening to this.

A (15:56)

It's every reaction that even I had when it first came out. I'm like, okay, this could be. This sounds insane. Sounds absolutely insane.

B (16:04)

Exactly, right? Yes, exactly. It sounds like a lie. And I'm thinking to myself, like, can you just not get me fired? Like, whatever. Like, whatever. Like, you entering my life is. Can it not end with me being fired? You know, it's like. So it's quite unbelievable. And I'm kind of. They start sending me documents, you know, to, like, I guess bait me into it. They get me interested, and I'm like, what is this? Like, the documents were making me feel better.

E (16:31)

It was like, how did you feel

A (16:32)

better about the truth of it?

B (16:34)

They were not making me feel better about the truth of it. I'm like, how? Like, what is this, like. Like, Photoshop, like, job that you did where you made these up? Like, I didn't believe it. The story just, to me, felt too crazy. And when my point did you go, you smell a rat? You smell a rat? You know, listen to your gut.

A (16:52)

At what point do you say it is crazy? But crack addicts are crazy, right?

B (17:00)

Yeah. So that's it. So the way that I got in touch where Steve Bannon got in touch with me was I had a friend who was working for him as a producer on War Room on his podcast, and this guy. So he came from kind of a rough background, and, I mean, maybe you can gather. I did not. And so I went to a few private schools growing up, and I had a very charming little thing going on. So I'm like, this is insane. I don't believe it. Who would act this way? And my friend calls me up and he goes, emma, you just come from too nice of a neighborhood for this. You never met any crackheads? I've met crackheads, and they forget things. It's not unbelievable. So I'm like, okay. Like, that actually makes sense. It's so, you know, simple that it has to make sense. I tend to like simple, true. Like, simple stories. They feel true. And. And he's like, just go see it. Just go see it. It's at Rudy's lawyer's house in Long island, so. And he was like, if you're not interested after that, then, like, whatever, it's fine.

A (17:59)

So this is at the time, because I remember when it first came out. I love Rudy Giuliani.

C (18:04)

Yeah.

A (18:04)

But this was coming out at the time. Remember he did that awful press conference where he was sweating. It was just so bad.

B (18:11)

Yeah.

A (18:11)

And he had damaged his credibility so much.

B (18:15)

Yes.

A (18:15)

That you were like, I like Rudy, but I don't. I don't know what I can trust. Were you there?

E (18:20)

Yeah.

B (18:21)

Well, so the press conference that you're referring to was after the election. So this was.

A (18:25)

Right.

B (18:25)

A few months before, but obviously, same kind of vibe, you know? And listen, like, I mean, I see Rudy and still see and still do. Maybe more so as a patriot, I do, too. And somebody who wants the best for this country and will fight for this country and will give up everything for this country, actually.

A (18:41)

Yes.

B (18:41)

Which he has and he's proven. But he's also Trump's lawyer. You know, he is an operative for the campaign as far as I'm concerned. Basically, so is Bannon, and I think he would probably say that himself. I don't think that that's controversial. And I am a conservative, obviously. I'm very openly conservative. My last job before the post was Hannity. My job after the post was Breitbart, you know. But at the same time, my capacity as an editor is to relay the truth as closely as I can, not to campaign for Trump. So as much as I like Trump and I wanted the story to be true, I was obviously skeptical of the source because I could agree with them. It doesn't mean that I could just put out whatever.

D (19:25)

Right.

B (19:26)

So that was my concern.

A (19:27)

And, you know, I would have. If that laptop would have come to me, the first thing I would have said to my staff is, run this down every possible way, because this falling, this much of a gift, falling into our laps and then just be handed to us sounds like a way for the other side to shut us down and destroy all of our credibility.

B (19:51)

Oh, 100%. I mean, right now, I'm sitting in front of you, like, six years later, and I'm eight months pregnant. the time, I didn't look like this. I didn't sound like this. You know, I was 27. I wasn't married. I just, like, was in New York, like, in journalism, like, moving fast and breaking things. And I obviously had it cross my mind, like. And I'm sure this is partly true. Again, I'm sure if you called up Bannon and asked him what did you think of the profile of the person that you were offering this to, he would say this is someone who's gonna run it. You know, it's like, just. I was interested in taking risks in a way that, you know, another editor wouldn't have been, or maybe I myself wouldn't have been today. And, you know, like I told you last night, you were like, how did you know that it was all real? And I was like, I don't think I can have a way to know that. You know, what I knew was what I was reporting was real, and that was enough. And that was enough for our editors, and that was enough, you know, I think, for ours.

A (20:54)

What you were reporting were things on the laptop are real. You weren't saying the laptop is 100% real.

B (20:59)

Well, this is like, how could I confirm something that has been through a chain of custody? What I can confirm is what I'm reporting. The way that I did that was, you know, and we're fast forwarding through the story, but, you know, it's good to get to the end. You know, I had to go through this thing. It's like thousands of documents, and I had to find, first of all, what the angle is, what's the story? I remember I called my boss, my editor in chief, Michelle Gotthelf, no longer at the Post, but legendary person. And I was like, I don't know how to make sense of all of this. It's, like, too much. Like, it's. It's too high volume. My brain is, like, glitching, like, I don't know what to think. And she's like, well, listen, like, we know that Hunter Biden is a consultant. We know he's sketchy. She was like, that's been reported. She was like, joe Biden's the one running for president. Like, find me where Joe Biden comes into this if he does. And that was when it clicked. It's like, oh, yeah, duh. Like, this is about Joe Biden. This isn't even about Hunter. Why do I even care about Hunter? And then I just started kind of going through it, and we found, you know, couldn't have been more than 10 documents that were relevant to that. And then. And you go from having to verify a hard drive that has been through a chain of custody that you believe or don't believe, it doesn't matter. It's. Are these documents real? And the way that we were able to do that was very simple. And I talked about this when I testified in Congress about this story, which I guess the real scandal isn't even the story itself. Right.

A (22:23)

But never is.

B (22:25)

Yeah, there was, like, people cc'd on all this stuff, so. And other people involved in all this stuff. So, you know, we had the contact lists in his phone book, which was also on the laptop. It was all part of that icloud or the hard drive. And we just called them and said, hey, it's New York Post. I'm gonna read you something. Can you tell me if it sounds familiar? And that's it. I mean, and then you had, like, you saw, you know, 24 hours after we published, Tony Bobulinski pops up. It's one of those people who's involved. Like there are other people involved. It wasn't Hunter, you know, scurrying around the world himself. There was business partners. And some of those partners had either been burned, some of them had gone to jail, some of them had realized that this is too much. Everyone was receptive.

A (23:10)

I'm so glad you didn't select the porn part to go over, because when it first came out, that was an angle from some people. And the porn was shocking and horrible,

B (23:19)

of course, as it would be.

A (23:21)

Yeah, but the real problem were these sweetheart deals and these backroom deals that you exactly like.

B (23:26)

We're the New York Post, you know, we're not like, you know, we're not pearl clutchers. You know, it's like, you're going to show me sex stuff. It's like, okay, like. Like whatever. Like, I want to see it, but like, I'm not like, you know, scared. It's like. It's not a scandal to me. The scandal to me is Joe Biden and the business.

A (23:44)

So what did you expect to happen?

B (23:47)

I expected, like, conservative media to, like, pick it up. I was like. So I was like, yeah. Like, I went through my social media. I was like, there's nothing weird. There's something wrong here. There's something weird here. You. This won't be a big deal. It'll end up getting picked up by Fox News or something Breitbart. And that wasn't what happened at all, as it turned out. The CIA was upset.

C (24:15)

Yeah, I bet.

A (24:16)

A little upset. A little upset. So nobody did pick it up, at least for a long time. And then by that time, what did it mean?

B (24:28)

Well, I don't. I mean, I think that there was a bit of a Streisand effect, actually about it. Like, I think that if it would have been how I predicted, where just conservative media kind of talks about it, you know, you pick it up and talk about would have been like a conservative media echo chamber, conspiracy theory, Benghazi, whatever. You Know thing that the left just dismisses, but because Twitter. So what happened to refresh the audience's memory? I'm sure they are familiar with this, but. But what happened was we published at 5am by like 7am latest. It was completely blacklisted on Twitter. To the extent that we found out later. It was two hours. Yeah, two hours. Within two hours, it was classified as child porn internally. So if you, like, sent it in a private. Like if I DM'd you privately, the link it would disable as it would if you were sending something criminal. So we found out again later that the reason why it was so immediate and so severe was because the FBI was briefing Twitter executives on a story that might publish around the election about Hunter and what to do in that circumstance. Because it's disinformation, we promise.

A (25:47)

And that is because they had it.

B (25:49)

Yeah, they had it. The FBI had the laptop.

A (25:54)

How long did they have it?

B (25:55)

Months. They had it from before the first impeachment, which was in January before COVID They know I was publishing September after Covid.

A (26:04)

You're streaming the Best of Glenn Beck.

E (26:06)

To hear more of this interview and others, download the full show podcasts wherever you get podcasts.

A (26:11)

Because it is Friday, I guess I start with the biggest news. There is a new American American Girl

C (26:16)

doll that is coming out. It is a sleeveless doll and its name is jcina.

E (26:28)

How dare you?

C (26:29)

Because yesterday we found out. Well, I found out this morning. Jcina, otherwise known as the man formerly

A (26:39)

known as Jason, or the girl formerly

C (26:42)

known as a man, a Marine, even yesterday found himself going for back alley

F (26:51)

Botox when in New York.

E (26:54)

I was tricked.

C (26:55)

How were you tricked? How were you tricked?

E (27:01)

Let me set the stage.

A (27:03)

I thought they were putting heroin in my face.

C (27:05)

How are you tricked?

F (27:06)

If you're watching on the Torch Insider show or stream@glennbeck.com torch it doesn't look like it's yet taken effect.

E (27:14)

Nah, it's supposed to take like a week or two.

C (27:17)

Okay, all right. Okay, okay, okay, Marine. Go ahead. Go ahead, Maureen. Tell me how you got Botox.

E (27:23)

I totally have. Well, so my wife has been exploring New York City. She's like. She's crazy. She's like a master at this point.

B (27:29)

She's.

E (27:29)

She looks like you actually walking through the streets.

A (27:32)

What does that mean?

F (27:32)

Wait, you know.

E (27:33)

You know there's rules when you walk the streets of New York City City. Like, you can tell when someone doesn't belong there. Like when they don't walk all the way out into the lane, you know, And Then just blow past the do not walk. You can tell who the tourists are.

C (27:45)

Yesterday I got into a fight with a biker.

F (27:48)

I'm shocked.

C (27:49)

It was like this biker just whizzes by now. Yes, he had the right of way. Yes, I was walking when I shouldn't have, but he was like, what the hell you doing walking? And I'm like, I'm just going to the other side. I can't take it. I can't take it.

E (28:04)

The bicyclists are now. They're like the worst than the cabbies were back in the 70s.

C (28:09)

Aussie pilots. It's crazy. Anyway, go ahead.

E (28:12)

So anyway, she was supposed to go do a procedure for herself on Wednesday, but she gave me this story like, oh, honey, I. I got lost. I ended up on First Avenue, and it was like 20 blocks away. I'd really need your help to find my way. This was yesterday.

C (28:27)

Wait, wait, wait. Okay, Your second man card is being revoked. You let your wife, who has not spent any time here. You were just gonna. You were gonna say to her, just go find yourself on first time. Just go find it your way. It's only about 20 blocks away. You just go ahead and walk down the street yourself.

E (28:45)

Okay, okay.

C (28:46)

For all the wow.

E (28:49)

For all the torch insiders, everybody, the guys. Are you married to a Latina? Tell Glenn. Instruct him. If you tell a Latina what to do or not.

F (29:00)

Tom, she is her own woman.

C (29:03)

Oh, no, I know she is. I know she is.

A (29:05)

But it wrecks this.

F (29:06)

She has a person

E (29:09)

mark. Scars on my arms when I said don't. Anyway, so I need your help.

C (29:13)

I'm not saying say don't. I'm saying, honey, I will go with you. I would never let. If Tanya was like, I don't. Tanya is a big girl. She knows how to.

A (29:22)

She lived here.

C (29:23)

She knows how to navigate. But if she was like, honey, I can't find it. I gotta go walk. And I say, it's 20 blocks. I would say, let me. I'll just go with you. I'll just go with you. But. But go ahead.

E (29:34)

Go ahead.

C (29:34)

Tell me how you stormed those beaches yesterday. Tell me about it.

B (29:38)

So.

E (29:38)

So. So I walk. I do my man duty, and I'm walking her to this appointment.

C (29:47)

Good for you.

E (29:48)

We show up.

C (29:49)

Yeah.

E (29:49)

And this is like a back alley door.

C (29:52)

Yeah.

E (29:53)

I feel like it was, like three feet wide. I'm having to go sideways into it. We go up this, like, this very ghetto stairwell, going upstairs to, like, the fifth floor.

C (30:02)

This is when I say to my

A (30:04)

wife, we're not going in here.

E (30:05)

I'm. Yeah, I'm thinking there's gonna be a saw angle or something. Something weird going on. So we get in and there's this. It wasn't bad.

C (30:13)

It was a.

E (30:13)

It wasn't a bad place. But she. My wife checks in and she goes, yeah. So we have two Jason Estella Buttrell, you know, for three o'. Clock. And I was like, jason, excuse me. Like I. Honey, I know I've told you time again. I'm not doing this. She's been saying my expression lines are getting out of control, which they kind of are. But I feel like that's just character. That's. That's my point of view for it.

A (30:37)

Wow.

E (30:37)

So I'm fighting.

A (30:38)

I would never say that. She's too busy saying, you look fat in that.

E (30:43)

But she knows exactly how to get to me. She says, but we're going to lose like half the money that I had to put up for, you know, the appointment.

C (30:52)

So then again, that's when a Marine

A (30:55)

says, looks like we lose.

E (30:57)

That looks like we lose money. Well, I. That's how cheap I am. She knew exactly how to nail me. So I ended up getting suckered into this.

F (31:02)

Okay, but what a story. You got it. But you need to talk about your reaction after and how you like just. You couldn't come out to Francis Tavern yesterday where George Washington gave his farewell address to the troops because you were in a fetal position.

E (31:16)

Ricky, shut up. Who's doing this interview?

C (31:18)

Tell me that part of the story. You didn't go to what. Where he gave his farewell address to his troops. You didn't go because

A (31:28)

your face had

C (31:29)

a little owie right there under my eyes. Ow, ow, ow. It was like little bug bites all over my face.

E (31:35)

Tell me this is not a.

C (31:36)

It was embarrassing. It was like. It was like. It was like mosquitoes making love to my eyes.

E (31:44)

Okay, for one, maybe it was the trauma, because the surgeon that comes out, I'm expecting, I don't know, like a little petite, you know, cute woman to do this and so.

A (31:53)

Sure. Why are you stereotyping?

D (31:54)

What?

E (31:55)

Yeah, I'm not stereotyping. Maybe this is what I was hoping for.

C (31:58)

Yeah, you know, so get the porn music. He was expecting some cute woman to go, would you like a happy ending with this?

E (32:04)

And oh, gosh.

B (32:05)

Oh.

E (32:06)

So instead. Instead there's, I swear, like a six foot six large woman who. Who speaks in a Russian accent.

D (32:18)

It.

C (32:18)

Of course, you went to a chop

E (32:20)

shop, but could it be. Anyway, she goes, excuse. I don't Know what? I don't know what she said, but what I heard was, you know, sit in the chair and I will poke you for, like, four or five times. I'm like, oh, my gosh. I'm like, honey, is this going to hurt? And she goes, now you won't hear. I asked the, you know, the Russian lady if this was going to hurt, and she just scowled at me. I swear. She just.

A (32:40)

Wow. Like, you and Russian rush and the Russian military somehow losing to you people.

C (32:47)

That's what she was thinking.

E (32:49)

Well, I don't. I don't know if this is a normal reaction or not, but I. When I stood up, I got lightheaded. I was like. I had. I was doubled over. I was sick to my stomach for the rest of the day. I mean, tell me, is. Is this Jason got to be a normal reaction, right?

F (33:03)

Women and some men that we know on television on me. No, no, not Glenn.

E (33:08)

He.

F (33:09)

He's had surgery, but it didn't fix anything on his face.

E (33:13)

Wait, wait, wait.

C (33:16)

What? You know, that wasn't part of the surgery I had to have. I couldn't remember.

A (33:22)

I couldn't see.

C (33:23)

They were like, you gotta cut your eyes open. I was like, grog. Hey, Adrian cut me. So they did that.

A (33:30)

But you keep looking at this. I have the weirdest, most Phantom of

C (33:33)

the Opera face ever. It's like a Frankenstein.

E (33:38)

You've got a facelift.

F (33:39)

That's what it's called.

B (33:40)

That's called a facelift.

E (33:41)

No, actually, can we redirect now back.

F (33:45)

He got a facelift, but it didn't fix anything.

C (33:47)

No, it did. I can see it wasn't supposed to fix.

E (33:50)

Fix the way I look, and I'm taking the abuse.

C (33:54)

Okay, Cuz you know what? I've. I've never had a man card. You can't take it from me. I've never.

A (34:02)

True.

C (34:02)

This is a man. You're a Marine.

F (34:04)

This is a man who went to a Broadway show every night this week.

A (34:07)

Oh, what?

F (34:09)

You are correct because you went to a Broadway show literally every night this week.

C (34:13)

Yes, I did. And I'm proud of it. Proud of it.

F (34:16)

Okay, so, Jason, let's go back to you being in a fetal position because you couldn't take a few pokes on your face.

E (34:20)

Well, I love how you redirected to Glen. I think we should just kind of sit in that bed for a while.

C (34:24)

Wait a minute.

E (34:24)

We're cooking with gas now, baby.

A (34:27)

Everybody's like, of course, of course, Glenn.

C (34:29)

Yeah, we got that. We got that.

A (34:31)

Not the Marine, not the what is it? The cupcake motorcycle group that you're in.

C (34:35)

What was the name of that?

E (34:36)

I'm not telling you. Jack now.

C (34:38)

It's like, we're the hot dogs where the Cocktail Weenies. He's got this biker jacket, this big bike, but on the back, it's like. I don't even remember what it is. It's like the Marine Cocktail Weenies. And he's like, yeah, I mean, the Cocktail Wheaties. You're like, I don't think that's a good tough name.

E (34:56)

Oh, my gosh. There's a poll up now for the insiders. You gotta be kidding me.

F (35:00)

Producer Matt for the win.

E (35:02)

Fired.

F (35:02)

Okay, so you want to take this poll? What's. Let's.

E (35:06)

Would Jason have had a botched botok experience if producer Matt was there to supervise? No. Producer Matt would have kept Jason's. What, kept Jason safe or. Yes, for retribution for all the slaps.

A (35:19)

Yeah, no, he would have. He would have been fired if he

C (35:21)

would have stopped you.

D (35:22)

This is. This is.

C (35:23)

This is Comedy Gold First Friday. We haven't had to do any work for 15 minutes.

F (35:28)

Please go vote of this poll now. Glenn beck.com torch oh, my goodness gracious, no.

A (35:32)

Change the poll.

C (35:33)

Change.

A (35:33)

Change the poll. I want a subject.

C (35:34)

I want a different.

A (35:35)

I want a different poll.

C (35:37)

Should the Marines revoke.

F (35:40)

Yes.

C (35:41)

Any.

A (35:42)

Any information they may have on his tour of duty.

C (35:49)

I mean, has there been a Marine that gets Botox?

A (35:53)

Honestly?

E (35:54)

Pretty sure Chesty Puller did Botox.

A (35:56)

Can I ask you Botox? Because he got it all over his face.

F (36:00)

I. I may have. I'm an older woman. I may have, over the years, had

C (36:06)

a little, you know, raise your eyebrows.

B (36:09)

Little shoe.

F (36:09)

I could do it.

C (36:10)

Okay, you can do it. Okay.

F (36:11)

It's relaxed in a few months.

C (36:13)

But he is like.

B (36:14)

But you know what?

C (36:14)

He's not gonna be able to smile.

F (36:15)

Jason. I go.

C (36:16)

He got it all the way down to, like, his.

D (36:18)

The.

C (36:18)

Like down his cheekbone.

F (36:20)

Jason. You get it. And you go to work, you get it. You go to church, you get it. You go do your duties.

C (36:26)

You couldn't do that.

A (36:27)

Don't say that. You don't know what. Daniel.

F (36:28)

Because you got Botox. Like, I have had a lot of respect for you over the years.

B (36:36)

Overnight.

C (36:37)

Yeah, overnight. There was.

E (36:40)

It was there. Interesting, because I think they did go quite further down because she had me, like, smile when I was lying in the chair.

C (36:46)

You're gonna be able to smile.

E (36:47)

I. I have they paralyzed, you know,

C (36:49)

in two weeks, is he gonna be

E (36:50)

like, let you know in two weeks,

C (36:51)

he's gonna look like this, isn't he? He's gonna just.

A (36:53)

I'm very, very happy right now.

C (36:55)

Look at me.

A (36:56)

I'm overjoyed.

F (36:57)

We hired you for your face face.

C (36:59)

Oh, yeah, clearly.

B (37:00)

Right?

D (37:01)

Clearly.

C (37:01)

No, nobody should buy that. Nobody should buy that. They might buy you were a distraction to my ugly face. Wow.

A (37:09)

Glenn is.

C (37:10)

That's hideous. How do you put that? Oh, my gosh.

D (37:13)

Yes.

C (37:13)

I mean, that may be that, but I don't think anybody's buying that.

A (37:16)

Oh, man. Well, thank you, Jason.

E (37:18)

Yeah, you're welcome for that.

A (37:20)

Glad you're not on my detail anymore.

C (37:23)

I was busy looking for.

D (37:24)

For.

C (37:24)

Through my Perth. For my gun. What? I couldn't help.