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Gwyneth Paltrow
I get so many headaches every month. It could be chronic migraine, 15 or.
Erin Foster
More headache days a month, each lasting.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Four hours or more.
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Erin Foster
Why wait?
Gwyneth Paltrow
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Erin Foster
When you are pioneering anything or introducing new ideas.
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To the culture, you get criticized.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You do? Yeah, did you hear about that?
Erin Foster
I didn't find the one.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I found someone I respected and we.
Erin Foster
Made it the one in the sort.
Sarah Foster
Of longing kind of view, of love.
Gwyneth Paltrow
People understand each other as if by magic.
Erin Foster
Nothing in itself is addictive on the one hand, but on the other hand, everything could be addictive if there's an emptiness in that person that needs to be filled.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I now know that nobody changes until they change their energy. And when you change your energy, you change your life. I'm Gwyneth Paltrow. This is the Goop Podcast, bringing together thought leaders, culture changers, creatives, founders and CEOs, scientists, doctors, healers and seekers here to start conversations. Because simply asking questions and listening has the power to change the way we see the world. Here we go. Welcome to the GOOP Podcast. I'm Gwyneth Paltrow, and today I'm sitting down with two of my good friends, a pair of overachieving sisters doing it all, hosting a podcast, running a fashion line, and now releasing season two of their hit Netflix show. We talk about the inevitable pivots on the way to success, what it's really like to work with family, and the very real challenges of fertility. Always hilarious, never predictable. Erin and Sarah Foster.
Erin Foster
Hi. The roles are really reversed now.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I know. It's so fun for me to get to do this today because, I don't know, I was just reflecting on. I've known you guys for such a long time and I love you both. And I've gotten to watch each of you go on these incredible journeys, both separately and then together as entrepreneurs. And I'm just. I was like thinking about it and I feel like, God, I'm so proud of them.
Erin Foster
That's so nice.
Sarah Foster
That's so nice. I know we've come, we've. There's been a lot of. There's been a lot of lives lived in our friendship.
Gwyneth Paltrow
There's been a lot of lives lived. So. So let's start back at the beginning. We don't have to traverse across the whole story because we told it on your podcast, the world's last podcast, Best podcast, first PODC podcast. What's it called?
Erin Foster
The world's first podcast. But I was going to say you and Sarah have a. A very deep history. And you and I, our history has really cranked up a notch in the last six months.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Our history. Oh, my God. I mean, since, since, since I did your pod aon. I feel like you're now my best friend and Sarah's below you.
Erin Foster
I know it's. And it's. I mean, the non toxic mom chat, don't be toxic. Has really brought us together because we have such a shared passion and You've been a fant to the chat.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Thank you. I would, I, I would say it's a shared psychosis maybe, but.
Erin Foster
Yeah, that's, that's okay. It's like pretty.
Gwyneth Paltrow
So funny.
Sarah Foster
I said, I said to Aaron, I was like, aaron, you're just like pushing Gwenth to be on your chat. She doesn't want to be on your chat. She's like, why are you pushing her kids are, she's an empty nester now. She want to be in your little baby mom chat. Cut to, you know, to find out. You're very active on the chat. Great addition.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Thank you. I, I take it seriously. I take my role seriously. I take, you know, I, it's, it's a very, it's, it's not.
Erin Foster
By the way, it's a big deal bringing someone new into the chat because I mean, I said this to you on the, on the podcast, but like, you know, I've suggested a few different people and the group's like, no, thank you. I mean, I was one of them.
Sarah Foster
I was one of them.
Erin Foster
And it's not for people who are curious about a non toxic life that's welcome to the world.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It's people you need. Like your fake PhD.
Erin Foster
Yes, exactly. You have to be bringing information, knowledge and a passion. It can't just be like a, you know, living fancy free or whatever.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Anyway, that's right.
Erin Foster
Anyway, you've been a great addition and it feels amazing having you on it and I love having that connection to you. Now I feel closer to you.
Sarah Foster
Me too.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Me too. Me too. And I always love it when I can, you know, find freaks like me to talk about microplastics with. You know, it's very validating and I.
Sarah Foster
Always love giving, you know, Aaron her friends, her other best friends. So. You're welcome, Aaron, you know.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Wow.
Erin Foster
Spoken like someone who's toxic and can't be on our chat.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That's a real development. Did you steal her real best friend?
Erin Foster
Yeah.
Gwyneth Paltrow
No.
Erin Foster
Jen and I have been getting close for the last five years and it's really kicked into high gear and she comes over like three times a week. I mean, she's. Because she's developed like a strong, strong.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Bond with my baby, Sarah. How does that make you feel?
Sarah Foster
I mean, you know that I've, I suffer from this thing that you don't suffer from. It's getting a lot better. Gwyneth, and we said it on our podcast, does not have fomo. She doesn't have fomo. She's securely attached. She's confident she never feels threatened. You know, I always feel threatened. I, I, I, I'm like in this fight or flight mode always, but it's totally better. Like, I'm actually very happy for you two to have this. Whatever this relationship is that you two are building that I'm sure won't, you know, sustain the way that yours and mine has. But, like, I'm happy for you guys to have it. I'm happy for her and Jen. Jen will always be my best friend, but it's, it's good.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Okay, good. Well, this, you know, this brings me actually to my first question because so, So a few years ago, you started a fantastic clothing brand called Favorite Daughter that's like, become incredibly successful. So proud of you guys. You've opened. How many retail stores do you have now?
Sarah Foster
We have Beverly Hills, our flagships in Beverly Hills on South Beverly. It's, it's beautiful. We're proud of it.
Erin Foster
Really, really beautiful.
Sarah Foster
We had Palisades, and then we are looking to. Aaron, we are looking to open.
Erin Foster
I didn't know I wasn't allowed to speak. I didn't know that. I didn't know the rules where I wasn't allowed to talk.
Sarah Foster
No, no, you are. We just gotta get through this. We just gotta get through the one sentence, and then we'll be opening. Hopefully two on the roadmap is two by the end of the year.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Amazing. So I kind of wanna start there because, you know, I feel like you guys have, you know, there are so many young women in their 20s who kind of have an idea of what they want to do, and they're sort of, you know, trying different things or don't necessarily feel fully empowered to go after their dream. I feel like you guys had a gestational period where you were sort of figuring it out, right? It was like, are you gonna act full time? Are you gonna write full time? Are you gonna invest? Are you gonna influence, for lack of a better word, like, there was kind of a lot percolating simultaneously and. And then all of a sudden, like, some major things took hold and got traction and kind of around the same time. So, so Favorite Daughter, I didn't see the clothing thing coming. It was such a good surprise. And sort of starting with the seed of, like, you guys and your, like, fake competition of one another. Obviously, the brand is Favorite Daughter. So inherently in that is, like, the dynamic is, you know, is expressed, brought to light. So will you tell me a little bit about that period in your lives? Right? Like, you're, Aaron, you were totally trying to Find a husband. Sarah, you were sort of like, what am I actually going to focus on? You were raising your kids. That was taking so much of your mind share, but you also had ambitions to do other things. You guys are. It's like, if I think back to five years ago, you guys are sort of like floating, trying to kind of nail it down. So how would you articulate the series of events that happened or what happened energetically to lead you guys into this period of clarity and execution and success?
Erin Foster
Well, I can just say for myself, because Sarah and I, we both have different paths, is that my first professional writing job in TV was when I was 29, and I'm now almost 43. And so it was a long time ago, but it was also a little bit of a late start for someone about to turn 30. And I was immediately met with a really challenging situation, and it sort of shook my faith. I was like, very clear, I really want to be a writer. I really want to be a professional writer. I loved having that opportunity. But then there was, like, a stumbling block where I got fired, and I questioned if I was good at it or not. And I didn't really know what to do next. So then enter barely Famous. We end up send, you know, selling a pitch that we write and produce and create and do our own thing. And it's like, you know, very guerrilla style. We don't make any money on it. We actually, like, lose money on it. People really like it, but it doesn't really get good ratings. It barely gets a second season. We still continue to not make money on the show, and you can't.
Gwyneth Paltrow
This was the reality show you did.
Erin Foster
Well, it's not. It wasn't a reality show. It was a scripted show about making fun of two people who would be doing a reality show.
Sarah Foster
Right?
Erin Foster
Yeah, exactly. So it was like our curb. And that sent us on a different path, but still, you're not making money doing that. And so from there, I, as somebody who wanted to be a writer, creator, showrunner, wasn't really able to have consistency in that. Like, I sell a pilot, they. They don't make the pilot, but you get a little money. I sell a pilot, they make the pilot, but it doesn't get picked up. You make a little money. So during that process, if anybody came to me and said, hey, I have this other interesting business idea that I think you should do, I would be like, I could try that too. If it was close, if it was a podcast, I was like, I want to stay busy. I want to stay Proactive. I, I don't know how to make my writing career take off. I don't know how to make it make me a millionaire, make me super successful. So I'm open to things that are interesting and creative to me. And I think in some ways being open to your life looking a different way does end up putting you on the path you kind of always intended to be on, just differently than you thought it would look.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right?
Sarah Foster
And Sarah, I mean, I think if I'm being really honest, I spent most of my life not having agency, like at all, like really just not living in this forward moving energy. I really sat back most of my life just thinking things were going to fall in my lap because things fell in my lap as a very young person. You know, when you're, when you're, and you're five, nine and people tell you you're attractive and you're you, you just sort of think like, okay, well I'll, I'll get opportunities, you know. I moved to Paris when I was 18. I was like, I can make money modeling. I can. I just, I didn't know who I was. As, as I've been very open about. On our own podcast, I had no, I had really no self esteem. I didn't know what I was good at. People told me, oh, you'd be good at this. I would try this and I'd be kind of good at it. But I just, I, I didn't have a plan. I really just didn't have a plan. And I always ended up landing on my feet. So the optics were that like, oh yeah, she's, she's doing well, like her.
Erin Foster
Life is good, blah, blah, blah.
Sarah Foster
But like my life wasn't really good because when you don't have agency and when you don't have a North Star and when you don't know who you are, you're not, as you love to say, you're not living in your integrity. Like it's really just sort of this gray thing. And I, you know, did I think what a lot of people do, which is I found my identity and who I was dating. So I would date men who did have agency and who were these like larger than life people because it gave me self esteem, like, oh, they want to be with me. So then I guess I'm okay. I guess I'm, I guess I'm interesting, I guess.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Do people know who those people are? I'm not gonna say. I'm just wondering if they do or not.
Sarah Foster
You know, I don't know. I mean, I'm everything. Every.
Erin Foster
Every paparazzi just wasn't around the same then, or else we'd have so much more evidence.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You bagged some whales?
Erin Foster
Yeah. Yeah, definitely bagged some whales.
Sarah Foster
Guys. The. The whales that I could have bagged that I didn't bag, That's a far more interesting story.
Erin Foster
But.
Sarah Foster
So, yeah, I guess my life really got good when I started being open to new opportunities. Like, I used to look at opportunities and go, okay, if this isn't leading to the thing that I think I want to do, I'm not going to do it. When I started being open to opportunities, not knowing where those. Those opportunities would lead, not necessarily thinking that those opportunities were. What's the word? I don't want to say below me, you know? But, like, when we took the Bumble position, everybody told us that was a crazy thing to do. People were like, you're finally now just being taken seriously as actress comedians with Barely Famous. Because it did. It wasn't. It wasn't a huge hit, but the industry took notice. The industry was kind of like, wait.
Erin Foster
Even though Gwyneth thought that it was.
Gwyneth Paltrow
A reality show, guys, that's a compliment that I couldn't tell the difference. Yeah.
Erin Foster
Oh, yeah.
Sarah Foster
That means we're really good actresses, Aaron. But. But it was kind of like the first time that. That, you know, comedic agents and. And executives were like, wait, those girls are funny. Like, we. We need to develop something else with them. So we kind of went from that to then taking the position at Bumble, where we were just.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I mean, and what was the role at Bumble? You were sort of ambassadors.
Sarah Foster
We were heads of creative. So Whitney, basically, that she loved Barely Famous.
Erin Foster
Her.
Sarah Foster
Her team love Barely Famous. She hired us to come speak on a panel and. And she was launching the BFF and biz arm of the app, and she was like, I don't know, guys. I think those girls should kind of come in and. And be our heads of creative. Make. Make finding a friend and a business partner feel relevant, feel cool, feel all the things, right? Like, and so everybody was like, why are you.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Why are.
Sarah Foster
Why are you doing that? That feels like, why aren't you writing another show anyways, that pivot. And I know we talk about pivots all the time. That pivot led us down a really fruitful, fruitful road.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And in what sense?
Sarah Foster
I'm. I'm. I'm. Well, I think it was the first time that Aaron and I really worked together.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And because you're ideating ideas about how to amplify Bumble and their mission. And it's like, I think just opened.
Erin Foster
Us up to seeing ourselves differently. You know, I think that I'm sure in some ways for you, Gwyneth, you're like, I identify as an actress, and then you start goop, and you're like, I'm a founder. I'm a businesswoman. I'm an investor. I'm a shareholder. Like, you become all these different things, and it opens up your mind to, I don't have to be this one thing I set out to be and, like, limit myself that way. And I think that Whitney was a big part in teaching us. You know, Whitney has a lot of confidence in business, and she doesn't really limit herself in any way.
Gwyneth Paltrow
But don't you feel like we're. We're kind of living in this interesting age where, you know, as soon as you have a platform, you can develop any number of business lines or creative lines out of a platform. It's actually like, in one way, it's so incredible, and it's so democratizing and empowering. And then in another way, it's sort of like anyone can do it, and the possibilities are limitless. But you guys have had real success at it. So why do you think that is? Like, for example, obviously, and we'll get to the show. But from a favorite daughter perspective, I just find it so interesting, right, because you weren't like, oh, I. My life's dream is to make a clothing line. No, no, no. So tell us about the process of that coming to you.
Sarah Foster
I mean, honestly, that falls in the same bucket as. As what I was saying, like, being open to new opportunities. Like, it actually. And I don't know if you want to tell this story, Aaron. You can tell the suburban riot story, but it stemmed from an opportunity that came our way that I was like, came my way. Okay, it can't be your way. Here's the story.
Erin Foster
Sarah and I have different strengths. So Sarah is very hardworking. Right. She has almost like a better work ethic than I do. She's got, like, more ambition than I do. But I am much more open to opportunities because I don't fear failure the way that Sarah feels fears failure. But that's because I failed a lot as a kid and Sarah didn't. Sarah was straight A student. She was always the best at everything that she did.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And I was eldest girl.
Erin Foster
Exactly.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You know, that is. That is an affliction. It's. It's like a. It's a. It's almost like a personality disorder. And I would know.
Sarah Foster
Yeah, totally.
Erin Foster
It is definitely a disorder. No, but I was very used to failing. I didn't get good grades. I didn't make the team. I didn't get, you know, all those things. So I was kind of comfortable in that zone of, like, I don't know, maybe I fail. And that won't define me because I've failed before. Sarah had a real fear around that and a fear around failing in front of other people. And so for her, she was very resistant to trying these things because she would think about what are. I don't want to put words into her mouth, but, like, the fear of what it would look like to other people, that if we tried this thing and it didn't work out, like, what would that say about us? Whereas for me, I would look at it as, like, how cool would it look to people if we tried something new and different and put ourselves out there? And if it doesn't work, I'm okay with that because it's not that I'm such a big person. It's more like that was kind of always part of my process is starting and failing, starting and failing. So it wasn't something, to me that was going to define me the same way, really.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I'm sorry to interrupt, Aaron, but I. I really. I really respect and admire that because, you know, as mentioned, I'm from the same campus, Sarah. Right. Where, like, when you're the firstbor daughter, like, I cannot stress this enough. It's like the. The implicit responsibility that gets put onto your shoulders in terms of reflecting back to your parents that they are good and important people and looking after your siblings. I mean, it's so intense. And I do think that creates a situation where we feel like if we're not perfect, we're nothing. Like, we're valueless unless we're perfect. And it's a really, really difficult catch 22. So do you feel that you've been able to kind of imbue Sarah a little bit more with this feeling of, like, it's okay to try and fail? Like, Sarah, do you feel, having watched Aaron's philosophy around this, that you feel a little bit more freed up or healed around this subject?
Sarah Foster
Yeah, I mean, Aaron always. I mean, Aaron and I are very different. At, like, at 20, I was always so concerned with. With what I looked like to people or what people thought of me. I mean, it really meant something to me. At least I thought it meant something to me. I was like, okay, if I go on this audition and I see appear there, they're gonna think, you know, that I've failed as an actress because I'm auditioning for this, like, you know, Tampax commercial when I was just in this big movie, but I'm not really a good actress, so I didn't get another role in a big movie. And now I'm at a commercial audition for Tampax, Truly. And I would suffer. I'd be like, I'm. I'm not good. I'm not this. I'm not that. Where Aaron. Aaron's like, I gotta pay the bills. I'm gonna get a job at Free People. And I needed to do that because I needed money. But I was like, I can't go do that, so I'm gonna. I'm gonna go figure out other ways, you know? And Aaron had no ego around it, you know, at all.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I love that.
Sarah Foster
But, yes, Aaron has definitely helped me, you know, in so many ways. But when it came to the clothing, that the seed was planted for us in the clothing business as a little T shirt collaboration with, like, a little random company that had reached out to Aaron, who just made T shirts and sweatshirts, saying, you and Sarah are really funny. Would you guys ever want to do captions for T shirts and sweatshirts? Okay, now Aaron goes, this sounds cool. I hear that. And I go, okay, I'm a copywriter now.
Erin Foster
Okay.
Sarah Foster
I'm. I mean, this was such a little deal that we didn't even have a contract.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Okay, so that's where the Favorite Daughter name came.
Sarah Foster
Yes.
Erin Foster
Well. Well, we had one. A contract. Just no lawyers looked at it, which was really smart. We signed it at Hugo's over lunch. So basically, we, you know, like, 15, no, 20 years ago or something, we started. Our dad wanted us to have an LLC with our sisters for, like, legal things. And. And I being the person who always had to do everything, was the person who exec it, named it or whatever, and, like, was the executor who would sign, sign things. So I just named it Favorite Daughter Music. Because, like every other parent, you know, our dad would joke when he was alone with us that we were the favorite. And so everybody's being told that they're the favorite when you're alone and then you talk to each other and realize that he's been telling everybody this. So it was just like a joke, like a nothing, you know, call it Favorite Daughter Music. So then when we were doing these T shirts, I thought I was so clever coming up with, like, dying alone with, like, a cat on it or, like, currently peeking, like, all these Things that I thought were super clever. Undiscovered model. They are. Thank you, honey.
Sarah Foster
They didn't sell. They didn't sell and they didn't sell.
Erin Foster
Sarah goes, oh, let's do one that says favorite daughter. And I was like, that's cheesy. No one's boring. And she's like, aaron, we're doing like 20 of them. Let's just do one. I was like, fine. So we do favorite daughter. Put a little heart on it. And $2 million of sales in one T shirt.
Sarah Foster
Come on.
Erin Foster
Weird. Yeah. Nothing else sells except for this dumbass T shirt. And so we're like, that's interesting. And basically this company, Centric took notice of it because this T shirt started being everywhere. And by the way, and therein lies our partnership. Right?
Sarah Foster
Like, it's like the things that, you know, she came up with this idea 20 years ago, but then I brought it back around. She on it. But I did it anyway. You know, it's like the ebb and flow and, and this sort of.
Erin Foster
It's just because I wanted it to be edgy. I wanted us to like come up with like snarky things and yeah, felt like cute. You know, all these people were buying it for their eight year old daughters and like buying it for all three of their daughters. They'd wear it in a picture together like a joke. And I was like, cute, but that's not what I'm going for. I'm going for like hard comedy. And I was wrong. This is the thing that worked. And so, wow. A company came to us, Centric, and they said, we want to start a fashion brand around this ip. And it was something that had never occurred to us. We weren't trying to do something bigger. And I think again, Sarah's instinct is fear. Like, no, no, no, no, no. Like, I don't want to put ourselves out there like that.
Sarah Foster
Where I was just sort of like, we're not doing a fashion brand. We're not fashion girls. Like, we don't even care about fashion. Like we don't.
Erin Foster
We, We.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You know what's so refreshing about it in a way too, you know, it's like, because what you are is like, you know, your personal style. You guys always look really cute. You're. It's a very California brand in my mind, you know, so it's like it turns it on its head. Like the whole point is that you're not like New York fashion who take yourselves too seriously in that respect. Right? You're like these gorgeous blonde dress like yourselves Always look great. Sisters. Thank you. Thanks.
Erin Foster
I think that what we realized is that there's Fashion is such a strong identity of the it bag and the it coat and the two thousand dollar this and, yeah, coveted stuff, and you have to be on the list. And. And that's not who we are. And so that's not our brand. Our brand. It turns out there's way more women in the world like us, right? Yeah, it's. There's more girls like us because girls can't afford to be that person. And, yeah, even if Sarah and I could afford it, it's just not who we innately are. So I think that the special sauce is a combination of us staying very true to ourselves, not who we want to be, not who we wish we were, who we actually are. Because I've always been intimidated. You know, my best friend Jamie, she's like the most stylish person on the planet. Like, that's intimidating for me. Right. I wish I could effortlessly throw something on. It's like a caftan with, like, feathers hanging off. And it, like, looks effortless, but, like, that's not me. So I think big part of it is accepting the truth of who we are and turning that into a superpower. And then also, if we sign up to do something, we really, really, really follow through with it. We stay focused on every detail. Just the same way you did when you started goop. It's not like you started something and then walked away. Like, every single detail is being paid attention to, and you can't take your eye off all at any point. Sarah and I are still in every fitting.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That doesn't change Same. So when you say, like, I thought that was really interesting how you just said, you know, we're very true to who we are, not. Not who we want to be or think we are. Like, how do you distill that down for yourselves? Like, do you think there's a. A freedom and just full acceptance of, like, okay, I'm letting go of this aspiration that I'm gonna be X You what?
Erin Foster
I just think there's a freedom in it. I think that resisting the truth makes you go crazy. And I think for me, at least, it's not like I was born comfortable. It took me a really, really, really long time to stop trying to be something else. And I just got comfortable asking what a word meant. Or, you know, on a trip, someone goes, what's the last book you read? I'm like, oh, I don't know. I haven't read a book in a year I would have panicked and lied to somebody at that point. If I was 25, I would have got like To Kill a Mockingbird. I don't know. I'd make something up that I thought was impressive, like I just read it for fun.
Sarah Foster
But that would be insane. If you said the last book you read was To Kill a Mockingbird at.
Erin Foster
A dinner, some annoying guy on a date would say that, you know, and it would send me into a spiral about it. But I don't know. I just couldn't live like that any longer.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I get so many headaches every month. It could be chronic migraine, 15 or.
Erin Foster
More headache days a month, each lasting.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Four hours or more.
Botox Advertisement Voice
Botox Onobotulinum toxin a prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine. It's not for Those who have 14 or fewer headache days a month. Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor. Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. Alert your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems or muscle weakness can be signs of a life threatening condition. Patients with these conditions before injection are at highest risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue and headache. Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms and dizziness. Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions including als, Lou Gehrig's disease, Myos or Lambert Eaton syndrome and medications including botulinum toxins as these may increase the risk of serious side effects.
Erin Foster
Why wait?
Gwyneth Paltrow
Ask your doctor. Visit botoxchronicmigraine.com or call 1-844botox to learn more. So how do you define yourselves, each of you? What are like the 3 to 5 kind of main values that you each carry?
Sarah Foster
Oh, you mean. Oh man.
Erin Foster
That's a good question.
Sarah Foster
Gwyneth.
Erin Foster
Those heart.
Sarah Foster
See, I told you Aaron. She's a hard hitting journalist.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That's not hard hitting journalism, honey. No, I'm just really curious. I. I want to hear how like you were talking about the truth of who you really are. So what are some words that help elucidate that for us?
Erin Foster
I mean, I think for myself, truth and honesty is sort of like the forefront of my Persona and how I live. And, and for me having integrity is really important. And I understand that might be obvious, but I mean like if I'm, if I'm talking about someone behind their back, it is really important to me that I don't go then kiss their ass two days later. Like I have to stay true to the things that I say. And I try really hard to do that. I also am an anxious person and I'm a really reactive person. It's really hard for me to not get like, activated by things and to not have like a jump reaction of defensiveness or justifying something. It's hard for me to apologize some, saying some of my negative things. And I really also accept myself, you know, good and bad. Good and bad.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Sarah?
Sarah Foster
Yeah, you know, I'm. I'm in an interesting place because I only really started taking a hard look at myself like four years ago, as you know. You know, we would sit at the dinner table and you'd say to me.
Erin Foster
Like, well, are you in therapy?
Sarah Foster
And I would just look at you and be like, no. And you would look at me and be like, okay. I mean, and you would lovingly be like, I know some people, if you'd.
Erin Foster
Like their number, this is an intervention. But like, I really realized over the.
Sarah Foster
Last four years that I have a lot of unhealed. And it's really crazy looking at it so late in life. I mean, it's like, it's such a disservice I've done to myself because there's nothing you can't overcome. You can wake up tomorrow and change. I believe that.
Erin Foster
Yes.
Sarah Foster
I believe, you know, we are who we are. And there are certain things about me. I'm always just gonna kind of be flaky. I'm always gonna kind of be bad on text. Even though my therapist is actually. He's literally, he texts me at 5:30 every day and he's like, what's your text count at? But I've, I've realized I.
Erin Foster
This is a very good time to be texting Sarah because her therapist has mandated that she respond to people.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Maybe I'll. Maybe I'll try again then, now that I know it's part of the protocol.
Sarah Foster
But I do have deep anxiety. Like, I want to be a perfectionist. I am a people pleaser. I, I avoid conflict. But yet then when I'm in conflict, I thrive in it because I love to just scream at somebody. I mean, I'm really like a fucked up person.
Erin Foster
Like, it's crazy.
Sarah Foster
Like I will have. I stay in a bad relationship for way long, longer than I should, because I'm too.
Erin Foster
I don't.
Sarah Foster
I want to avoid the conflict of leaving a relationship. I mean, I'm talking like, you know, along, you know, earlier relationships. I'll stay with like a bad agent. Like an agent who like won't Return my calls for two years, still stay. I'm like, oh, well, you know, I don't want to fire him, even though he would love to probably get rid of me. I've just never known how to face conflict. But then I'm very combative, you know, Like, I love to say to someone, like, you can go yourself. Like, I. That doesn't stress me out to say that to someone which is not normal.
Erin Foster
I know when it comes.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yeah, like that.
Erin Foster
But when it comes to business, whatever, I'm like, I'm not putting up with this. This is. Sarah panics, and it's like, no, no, you can't say that to the person. Like, she has a very, like, we're lucky to be here kind of mindset where I'm in the whole house down.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It's like a peacemaker mindset, you know, which, which, which. It's kind of like a let's. Let's not, let's not do anything to blow up the situation.
Sarah Foster
But also, in business, Aaron is more confident because Aaron has an innate talent. Aaron is a writer. She will always be able to fall back on being really talented at something. I am more of a connector and a. Like, I don't even know what you want to say about me, but I feel like I always have to be, you know, churning. I have to always be. I don't know what the word is. So when Aaron is like, no, let's walk away from this deal, I'm like, wait, what? No, you can't walk away. Because then if you walk away, then the deal might explode. And then where's my security? Because financial security is a very.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right.
Sarah Foster
I'm always. We had a mom who was an amazing mom, but our mom, you know, supported us on child support checks. Like, that's how it works, right?
Gwyneth Paltrow
Like, there was scarcity. There was scarcity, yes.
Sarah Foster
And I, I knew when the child support check was late. I knew. I knew as the oldest. As the oldest daughter. So in my mind, I'm like, I don't, I don't want to be living my life like that. So I have to constantly. I'm always in fear that I will lose everything, that I will have nothing. It's just a thing. And it's right.
Erin Foster
So.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right. So that makes sense. Then you want to keep things sort of a status quo because they, they, you know, you could make something worse. Right.
Sarah Foster
By terrible way to live.
Erin Foster
But.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Well, but I, you know, I, I just want to say, you know, I think there's been a lot of growth from, from that and you know, like even, even deciding to, you know, around this time when you started to look at yourself about four years ago, I think there was like, you were very brave in how you started to think about the kind of life that you wanted going forward and for example, how your romantic relationship dovetailed into that. And you know, that is, that is a very brave, difficult thing to do, you know, to. As we've talked about a lot, you know, when you make a decision to, to not be with the father of your, of your children and. But it is also a very self honoring choice, you know, and Tommy's awesome. It's not about that. It's about. Right, like the reckoning of this is I need to release the real me and be able to make decisions from that place.
Sarah Foster
Yeah. I mean, I just spent, I've spent way too long just living in autopilot in so many ways. I used to say to you, I used to be like, it's like I'm at 37,000ft in the clouds, like asleep at the wheel. Like, I just don't. And that's not even. That was in every aspect of my life. I even found myself in the way that I parent. You know, that's no way that we should live our lives as a mother, as a partner, as a founder of who. As a human, as a woman. As a woman.
Gwyneth Paltrow
But don't you think it's like also no accident that, you know, you sort of stuck a stake in the ground, claimed yourself, claimed your agency.
Sarah Foster
Yeah.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And then like all of this success started coming. You know, I don't, I don't think that's an accident.
Sarah Foster
Yeah, I mean I, I also, I'm so lucky that I have Aaron as a partner because Aaron, Aaron wakes up and, and she has an abundance mindset and not an abundance and get rich, but just an abundance. Just an abundance can be a million things and it's such a great way to live. And I wake up the opposite of that. So if I didn't have a partner with that mindset, like, I don't know, I mean, I would just. Well, I'd be on OnlyFans, I guess, which still not know, you know, still not.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It's always an option.
Sarah Foster
We should collaborate. We should collaborate on that.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And Erin, one of the things that really like fascinates me about you is that you do, you are an optimist. You have this, you do come from a place of abundance. I mean, of course you have your like dry, wicked sense of humor. But you, you are an optimist. And my. And you.
Erin Foster
You.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You do have this sense of abundance, that life is behind you. It's. So how have you been able to. Like, when something really difficult like, like you had 81,000 rounds of IVF, like, how did you remain so positive?
Sarah Foster
That's crazy.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Like, I've never. I've. I've never had a friend who's got. Been through the ringer more on that front. And I know you've talked openly about it, otherwise I wouldn't have spoken about it. But how. Like, I. I'm so interested in, like, what was your philosophy around doing it, Continuing to do it. The resilience. How did you conjure the resilience? Like, how did you stay so positive until you got the result?
Erin Foster
It's crazy.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I mean.
Erin Foster
There were a lot of times I didn't feel positive. You know, I mean, there was a time where, like, I think after maybe 10 or 11 rounds, I, like, kind of had a mental breakdown. And I was like, I need to go somewhere. And I. I don't remember if I asked or if she offered, but our little sister Jordan got on a plane. She had a baby. She lived in New York, and she got on a plane and we. And met me in Sonoma. And we, like, turned our phones off for three days and drank wine and rode bicycles and got massages and disconnected. And it, like, kind of saved me. It gave me another. I don't know, three or four years of going through it. Like, it gave me some stamina because I just felt like I was going to lose my mind a little bit with the frustration. So I hit breaking points. It's not like I was always positive, but, you know, I. I had a. I had a really strong faith that it was going to work out. And it. I can only think of the comparison to finding my partner, because when I was flailing and going on bad dates and not in a place where it seemed like it was going to work out, I just had this strong feeling that it would work out. And I didn't know how, but I did think it would. And I think a big part of it, the fertility faith and the love faith and the kind of faith everyone should have, is it might not work out how you want it to, but it will work out if you allow it to. And I really felt like I will meet my person. And I remember having a very clear age in my mind at, like, when I was like, 32 or something. I might not meet my person till I'm 41. That was an age that scared Me, like, I might not meet my person till I'm 41, and he might already have kids, and I might be a stepmom. And if that's how it works out, but it works out, I have to be okay with that. I don't like how that looks. I don't like how it sounds. I don't like how long it's going to take, but I have to be okay with it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And sort of letting go of the. Those, like, prescriptions, like the prescriptive. My life has to look like this.
Erin Foster
Yeah. And I don't know where that comes from. I think just because I had a harder time the first half of my life, and Sarah had a easier time the first half of her life, and then we sort of switched roles, and Sarah started to have a hard time because she was looking at herself, and I started to have an easier time, but my life didn't turn out the way I thought it was going to. It's very different. And I ended up having a baby at 41. And that's not when I thought I was going to have a baby, you know, but now I look at it and I go, wow, the timing was really perfect.
Gwyneth Paltrow
So, like, it sounds to me, listening to you, that you have faith. That faith. I don't. You know, it courses through your body like this, knowing, like, I know it's going to be okay. I don't know how. Right. Or I'm going to let go of these preconceived ideas about how my life is going to look in the timeframe, which are very, very difficult for young women to do, especially in our culture, I think. So then you meet the love of your life, and it turns out that he's Jewish, and you have to convert to Judaism. And I'm so curious because, like, there are so many beautiful things in Judaism, especially the mystical side, which really resonates with me. And I come from this long line of mystical rabbis. Like, when you went through the process of converting, was there anything about the Jewish faith that you learned about that sort of, like, ratified or the. The. The internal faith that you had already were? Like, did you combine those things in. In any way, or were you just like, no, I'm just converting so that this hot Jewish guy will marry me?
Erin Foster
I mean, a little bit of both, I guess, but. But, you know, like, 15 years ago, my girlfriend, Sophia Rossi, she got more religious in her Jewish faith, and she decided to sort of dive deeper into Judaism. And I went to a few Jewish classes with her just because I had nothing else to do. And I was fascinated by it. And I weirdly, like, posted a Picture on Twitter 15 years ago that was me holding a book about Judaism. And I said, like, attention, Jewish guys who make great husbands. I'm willing to convert. And it was just a joke. You know, I just obviously, in my mind, heard, jewish guys make great husbands. And I thought, like, that would be a great life for me. And then, you know, 15 years later, it was happening, and. And I manifested it in some way that I didn't even understand at the time, which is so funny. I really think that the thing about Judaism that I really connected to was the idea that you're allowed to question everything, and you're actually expected to question everything.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right.
Erin Foster
So when I started to convert to Judaism, I was really nervous that I was going to end up having to do something that didn't align with me internally and that I would be faking it. And that really, really scared me. I didn't want to sign up for something that didn't feel right to me.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right.
Erin Foster
And. And it was when I voiced that concern and the rabbi was like, great. These are exactly the conversations we should be having. I was thinking, wow, I'm in the right place.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Has it been additive for you?
Erin Foster
Yeah, it has. I don't connect my faith to my life working out with religion, but I really like this feeling I have with Judaism where it's this framework that we can always come back to when we're feeling a little out of sorts. Simon and I travel, we work, and it's like, let's do Shabbat together. Let's have friends over. Let's have dinner. Simon's really good at saying, let's light the candles tonight and talk about our week, and let's talk about what we want to do better next week, and let's reconnect and let's be grateful for each other. That stuff is really, like, comforting to have. And I chose a partner who is very sentimental and very, you know, focused on a connection and constantly reaffirming the connection and re establishing it. And to me, there's a connection with Judaism in that, because, I don't know, it's, like, inherently a part of the culture.
Sarah Foster
But I also think we grew up around chaos. And there's something about the Jewish religion that is the opposite of that. It's like, I've clinged to Judaism through.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I was gonna ask you.
Sarah Foster
I. Through Aaron and Simon and his parents, Marina and Anatoly, and the siblings Masha and Al. It's like it's this beautiful family that, you know, they, they. They are so loving to one another. And it's not that our family wasn't loving, of course, we're. But it was just chaos. And there's something about, about the way that the families that I've now met that practice Judaism, that it's, it's, it's. It's chaos in a more beautiful way. Does that make sense? Like, it's the coming together, it's the family, it's the connecting, it's the conversations, it's the listening, it's the. It's the showing up for one another. And we've all through Aaron and Simon. Now we get to experience.
Erin Foster
It's.
Sarah Foster
It's. It's a whole new experience for our family.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That's so beautiful. Yeah. Don't you know any nice Jewish husbands for your sister?
Erin Foster
Oh, my God, that would be amazing.
Gwyneth Paltrow
You know what I think? I feel season three of Nobody Wants this coming along.
Sarah Foster
Oh, my God. Should we talk? Nobody wants this. No.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yes. Because this is a perfect segue because you obviously wrote this wildly successful show for Netflix based on. Well, loosely, semi based on your relationship with Simon and the conversion and Sarah, you produced it. I mean, again, like, I cannot tell you how thrilling it was when you guys are like, yeah, we're. I don't know, we're just working on. I'm sure it's nothing like we're doing this show for Netflix. And then it's like the biggest hit of the year and Emmy nominated. So proud. So how. How did you parlay that, this story of your life? Like, how did you even start to. Were you like, this is just a great story because you're a writer, you're like, oh, this is comedy gold. Like, I'm writing all this real life stuff down and I'm gonna turn it into a TV show.
Erin Foster
It was really. Ollie.
Sarah Foster
It was Ollie.
Erin Foster
Yeah, it was a big part. Was Ollie. Ollie Oates, who's our producing partner and manager at 3 Arts. No, honestly, when I, When I met Simon, I kind of stopped writing because I just come off of a pilot that I had shot that did get made that I really thought should get made. I was very kind of, like, disenchanted with everything. And I was almost 36, and I was sort of like, I don't know what I'm chasing, but I don't really want to chase it anymore. I really want to be a wife and a mom, and, like, that's my next. So when I met someone who was not in entertainment really in this side of it, you know, he wasn't chasing that thing. And we started to establish this sort of domestic life together. I just thought, this is kind of what I want now. And this isn't really funny, right? Like, what am I going to write about? I was always writing about my failures or bad dates or bad relationships. And that was really funny to me. And there wasn't anything funny about this to me. I was like, it's really sweet and wholesome and like.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And I read that you were slightly worried that that was going to make you like a less sharp comedian writer.
Erin Foster
Yeah, I definitely was. Because Simon has never dated anyone who's in the spotlight like this. He's never dated anyone whose life is out there. He's very private. He comes from an immigrant family. Like, you don't talk about anything. So the idea that I was going to write something that was inspired by our life was very challenging for us at first because Simon was like, like, no, you can't do that. Like, you can't write about us. That's. No, you can't, like, make fun of my family. Like, that's not okay. So it kind of shut me down creatively. I didn't really know what to pull from if I wasn't allowed to make fun of my relationship. I didn't really know what I was supposed to write about. And Ollie was kind of like, what are you doing with your life? Like, why aren't you writing? This is so weird. We should write about this and find a way to do it. And so he pushed me to. And then, and then, and then I did it and I found a way to not make it. In a lot of ways, Simon probably pushed me to. To tell the better story, which is the more wholesome story, which is about these two people loving each other instead of it being all about the comedy. Yeah, it wasn't about making fun of this connection, it was about celebrating it. And, you know, the irony is that I feared it wouldn't be funny or interesting enough to write about. And then, you know, unintentionally, it ended up being this, like, celebration of healthy love and the celebration of, like, grown up love. And two people who really should be able to make it work, trying really hard to get over their shit for each other. And that absolutely is what we were doing in real life. I just didn't really realize that that was going to resonate for everyone, that part of it, you know.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And Sarah, what's your role in it? Like, what do you hand from a. Hands on Perspective. Are you coming up with story? Like, what does a producer do?
Sarah Foster
Yeah, I mean, when it came to this specific, this was just like one of the five projects that we. We had an overall deal at, at 20th.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And this was sort of cool, by the way.
Sarah Foster
I mean, which is so cool. But as you know, it's impossible. You think you have something great. You know, we were really developing things that we really good and edgy and funny and had all the things. And even if someone buys it, it dies. You know, it's like, it's crazy. It's like just when you're selling, you never know when to celebrate in this business. So Shiksa. Shiksa was one of five, which was, I think one of five projects we had in development under our deal. And originally we had sold Shiksa. I think it was just me, Ollie and Aaron in the room. We sold it to 20th. They were like, yeah, this is, this is great. This is great. And I started thinking to myself, I was like, this business is so cut throat. Like, how are we. How is this not going to be one of the five other projects that is never going to see the light of day?
Erin Foster
Like, what do we do?
Sarah Foster
How do we actually get this freaking bot? So I was like, I think we need to bring in like someone major to come on board. And I think this person needs to come on board and their name and their influence and their. It's going to help. It's going to. As we know, it's like a package situation. Like you gotta, you know, whatever. So we brought Steve Levitan on, who created Modern Family. And, and so that's what a producer does. A producer is like, how can we get this bought? How can we actually put ourselves in the best position to get this on the air? And so from there, you know, you have your relationships at places I had a relationship at, at Netflix. And then once you're, once you're there, then, then yeah, I'm involved in, in breaking story and storylines and editing and on set. That was season one. But this is Aaron's show, you know, I mean, Aaron's the creator and I'm just, you know, and yeah, so it's like, I'm not, I'm not a writer by any means, but.
Gwyneth Paltrow
But you're so funny and you're so clever.
Sarah Foster
I have a pretty good idea of like, what people want. I understand what people want. You know, I think that.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right.
Erin Foster
Yeah.
Sarah Foster
And so, you know, you're involved in casting and you're involved in, in all of those things.
Gwyneth Paltrow
So what Is it, like, now that you're. You know, it's like you guys are. How old are you? 42 and 44. Yeah. So how. What is it, like to, like. Like, at 42 and 44, have this monster hit?
Erin Foster
I mean, it's really validating. It is really validating, and it's cool. I mean, there's nothing. I mean, I. I think that, you know, we. It's so weird. Like, no one ever. I mean. No, it's hard for people to let you enjoy things, you know, because it's always about what's gonna happen next. Whether it's your baby, everyone's after a relationship, or it's your show. And by the way, as big as a hit as the show was, you know, people will be on to the next thing, you know, a year from now, and that. That just naturally happens. And so I can only speak for myself. I'm trying to really enjoy it, you know, for me as a writer. I think that, you know, when you're a writer, you're putting your thoughts and your views on the world and a relationship. I mean, you're married to one out in the world to see what people think of it. And I've done it many times. You know, when people say to me, like, this is so crazy for, like, your first show and it's a hit, I'm like, this is my first show. This is just my first hit, you know?
Gwyneth Paltrow
Totally.
Erin Foster
I've had a lot of stuff that I've tried to put out there, and. And when. When you're getting feedback that's like, it's missing this or it's missing that, or you don't really write real jokes or hard jokes or. It's not really about anything. There's no big event that's happening. You know, what's the engine? It makes you think, like, maybe I'm not cut out for this, or maybe I don't have what it takes. So to have this land the way that it did really kind of undid a lot of those fears that had been instilled in me, which was like, I don't have it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That's so great. And do you feel like it kind of paved those cracks over, like, and gave you more confidence?
Erin Foster
Yeah, because the things that I was told I didn't have as a writer are the things that people like about the show. So I don't think that I could write the next James Bond movie. I don't think that is what I'm right for. You know, I just think that there's A lane. Now that I can do. And I don't feel a need to be in every lane. I'm happy to be good at this lane. I'm happy to be good at the rom com lane. I like this lane. I don't need to be all things to all people because I. I don't. I just don't think I'm capable of it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
We need rom coms in this day and age.
Sarah Foster
Anyway, guys, by the way, we have one for you.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Oh, great. Well, I'm retired.
Sarah Foster
Well, you're gonna have to unretire, honey.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yeah, okay.
Erin Foster
Like a vasectomy, they can be undone.
Sarah Foster
But you know, Aaron, it's so true. It's like I remember the studio saying to us about one project or whatever, like, it reads like a play, you know, it's. It reads like a play. Like it's not, you know, And Aaron's like, but that's how I write. Like I. Not, not shiksa, but it was like another project. She's like, but, but I write. I. I have. That's how people talk. That's how people connect. That's how relationships evolve. Like, it's long winded conversations with awkward pauses and, and you know, and it turns out that, like, she didn't change her style to fit into what, you know, executives want. She's like, well, this is just how I write. If it's not going to get bought, it's just not going to get bought. And we have a million other things we can do, you know, and nobody wants this reads like a play because that's how people talk. And that's how you fall in love with characters, you know, so it's.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Oh, sorry, go ahead.
Erin Foster
No, I was just gonna say, I think when it comes to talking about, like, not knowing if your career is going to work out or not knowing if your relationship's gonna work out and all these things and having faith, it's like the thing that I've learned is when you're dreaming about your perfect partner, your perfect job, like, you don't even know your own potential. It could be so much better than you even are imagining. And so when you open it up to being different than how you see it, it's like it. It's probably gonna end up being better than you thought it was, but different. Maybe being a stepmom is literally going to be the most rewarding thing that you've ever felt, or it's going to be the relationship that you didn't realize you were ever going to have. It's like with my engagement ring, I didn't even know my own potential. I was sending this guy rings that were very small. I had no idea when he gave me something I didn't want, it was going to be even better than I had imagined.
Sarah Foster
That is an insane.
Erin Foster
Like, what.
Sarah Foster
Where did.
Erin Foster
Sometimes we don't even know our own potential.
Sarah Foster
But it does. Doesn't it kill you? GP and Aaron, you know when you like thinking going back to our 20s and our 30s and you know, obviously we speak to women on our podcast. I think most of your audience is probably female. Don't you just want to shake the 27 year olds that write us going like, I'm turning 30, my life is over, I don't know what I'm doing. You're like, oh my God, you're an infant. The best years are ahead of you and you can't. We can only look at it, we can only look at it through that lens now that we're here and that life is now good. And you can't see that when you're 30. But God, I mean, our 20s suck so bad.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It's there. The 20s are, are. It's. It's like a double bind is. The twenties are so inherently difficult. None of us know who the fuck we are, what we're doing or where we're trying to go. And then we have this incre. Societal pressure that we're supposed to be married and have a kid by the time we're 30. I don't know where. I mean, this is like a relic from like the days of, of, you know, having to have kids when you're 16. Like when you're, it's, it's so crazy. That's the one thing that I wish the most is that the 30s are the most incredible time for real discovery. That's when you really start to get a sense of who you are and what you want. You can start. I, I wasn't married when I was 30. You know, I, I didn't have a kid when I was 30. I. And I felt so much pressure. I felt like I was failing. You know, I felt. And it, it's so stupid. As you say, like the 30. 30 is so young. And especially now with like fertility technology, you know, you can, you can. There's no, there's no time pressure the way that there used to be as well.
Erin Foster
Yeah, well. And the time that you're just starting to kind of discover your career self and figure out who you are is right when you're supposed to be having the Baby and getting married.
Sarah Foster
And right when they're telling you your eggs are getting old, like, it's exactly right. When you're feeling like, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm living up to my potential. I'm doing the thing I want to be doing in my career. It's like, oh, well, your eggs are going to be, you know, of no use in two years. I mean, it's just.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yeah. Can you. Are you guys allowed to tell me any little tidbit, any little teaser on season two? When does it come out?
Erin Foster
First of all, comes out October 23rd. I mean, the season one was, you know, these two people meeting and figuring out what to do with these feelings, and it ended with him choosing her over his career. And so season two is figuring out how they're supposed to make that work. It's really what the next four months look like in that relationship.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Oh, I'm so excited. I'm really.
Erin Foster
I feel really good about it. I have to say. I feel really good about it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
And I. And I have to say, too, like, I. I love so much. And you touched on it earlier, something that's so original about the show, which is like a paradigm of a good, healthy relationship. And people, you know, so often we see in romantic comedies, it's like the girl, you know, being stood up, and it's like all the examples of terrible guys, and it's like she has to traverse through a series of bad guys in order to. And I just love that it's just about these two really good people that are committed to this because, I mean.
Erin Foster
You'Re in a great relationship. I'm sure you've experienced a version of this, which is being in toxic, complicated relationships is a little easy because you always have something you can blame for why it's not working, and you can always make it the other person's fault. And you can kind of behave badly the whole time because it's like there are no rules. And then when you meet someone and you're in a healthy relationship, you have.
Gwyneth Paltrow
To be all your gets exposed.
Erin Foster
Yes, it really does. You can't really blame them for everything because they're not cheating and lying and pulling and saying one thing and doing another. They're showing up. And so you have to show up and you have to speak respectfully, and you have to listen to their version of the story, and you have to, like, better yourself. And you can't slam doors and you can't cuss them out, and you. You have to, like, be a real Person. And. Yeah, and, and I think that, that felt really interesting to me to have that be the relationship that you analyze when you, you really want to be good enough for the relationship because that person's showing up.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I, I couldn't agree with you more. And I think, you know, we need more examples of that in the culture, you know?
Erin Foster
Yeah, yeah.
Sarah Foster
Don't you feel like we're so used to seeing the dynamic and, you know, modern day television where it's like, it's the guy that's unsure. It's like the guy that's like, I don't know. Like, I don't know. And it's usually the girl, like, really wanting the commitment.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Right.
Sarah Foster
And I think that's something else that people really gravitated to was seeing that reversal. It's like, it was nice to see the man know exactly what he wants. Like, I want you and I'm willing to, you know, do whatever it takes.
Erin Foster
To be with you.
Sarah Foster
And it was her, it was her kind of vacillating between. I don't know, I don't like my career. My. That, like, it's just like. I think people really loved that dynamic as well.
Gwyneth Paltrow
There's a theme here. Nice Jewish husbands.
Erin Foster
Sarah, be open to it. But I think also the, the more, more than that, I felt like I was sick of seeing dynamics in shows where you have a strong woman and the nice guy is sort of passive and soft and you think in real life this would never work. He would never be able to manage a woman like this. He would never be able to, like, you know, hold all of this. And she wouldn't stay attracted to this guy. And so I really didn't want to show a dynamic that I couldn't see working in real life.
Gwyneth Paltrow
That's so great. Wait, it's so amazing.
Erin Foster
Is Brad Jewish too?
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yes.
Sarah Foster
Hello, Aaron. Where have you been?
Erin Foster
I don't know. I, for some reason I didn't think of him as Jewish, but I guess he is Jewish too. And you're Jewish. God, Sarah, you really need to join the party. I know.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Well, I'm, I'm half, technically, and some of my more religious friends don't accept me because my, my dad is the one who's Jewish, but.
Erin Foster
Yeah, but that's old school. I mean, Reform Judaism totally accepts father and mother. I mean, that was just when you didn't know who someone's father was. You, you just determined it by the mother because you knew for sure that was their mother.
Gwyneth Paltrow
But now I know, guys, there's DNA.
Sarah Foster
Tests like Can I also just say, like, I love this podcast so much. I was saying to somebody you, like, I'm not gonna just now, well, I will toot your horn a little bit, but you are at the forefront of pivoting and doing things where you don't know how people are gonna receive it. And, like, nobody was doing podcasts when you started this podcast. I think when you started this podcast, I was like, what's a podcast? I'm not even kidding. And it's, like, so cool that to be on this podcast that I'm such a. I love this podcast. I listen to this podcast, and I listen to, like, all in and the daily. Yeah, like, that's it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Thank you, Sarah. So nice of you.
Sarah Foster
No, I just, like, you are. You are such a freaking trailblazer. And it's like, you're so inspiring to all of us, to your friends, to people that, oh, my God, what you got to be able to take. You're the worst at taking.
Gwyneth Paltrow
I know.
Sarah Foster
No, everyone knows. You're amazing guys.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Stop talking about it. Oh, my.
Erin Foster
True.
Sarah Foster
All right, well, but it's just so nice of you to ask us to be on your podcast.
Gwyneth Paltrow
No, I'm. I. You know, I love. You know, I really wanted to have you guys on, because I think you are. I. You are. You both are, like, separately and together. This incredibly. Like, I love how outspoken you both are, how honest you both are. I love how you sort of of clash and combine paradigms. Like, oh, we're supposed to be. Like, if we're pretty, then we can't have a personality, and we can't have a brain, and we can't, like, say the. The really true, true thing. Like, I love how you guys are sort of punk rock in that way and how you're so yourselves. And I know you said earlier that you don't like confrontation, Sarah, but, like, one of my favorite things about you is how forthright you are, you know, and how you aren't afraid to say the confrontational thing when it needs to be said. So I just. I just. I'm really inspired by you guys and how. And I love seeing this, like, incredible success blossoming in your 40s. And it's, like, it's so exciting to see, and I think it sets such an amazing roadmap for other women who are like, you know, because so many of us are like, what are we doing? What direction should I go in? And, like, could this ever happen? And so it's just so inspiring.
Erin Foster
Well, I guess we're all really inspired by each other.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It's cool.
Sarah Foster
I think it's also so helpful doing it with someone else. Like, I really encourage young listeners. Find a partner. Like, I want my daughters to go to college. Not because what they're going to major in is going to be the career path they take, but they're going to meet their people there, they're going to meet their future co founders, their future mentors, their future people they're going to start businesses with or who they're going to work.
Erin Foster
Work for.
Sarah Foster
Like, it's all about connection in every which way. And yeah, Aaron and I are sisters.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Yeah.
Sarah Foster
So it was, it's like a built in situation, but not really. I mean, I do encourage, but I.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Think you're absolutely right. Like the, the having a co founder, right?
Erin Foster
Yes.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Oh, yeah, it's. It's so. I mean, I wish that I had a co founder. You know, I've had to build my business by myself as an artist. I was by myself. You know, I, I think you're absolutely right on that. That. Yeah.
Sarah Foster
I mean, there are certain things. It's a, it's a, it's a solo mission. It's a one person thing. But I do encourage people to put yourself out there and, and find a creative counterpart. Find someone to do this with. To do.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Guys, go on Bumble Biz. Yeah. And find.
Erin Foster
Yeah.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Okay. I love you guys. You're the best. Aaron, I'll see you on the chat in about eight seconds.
Erin Foster
Literally. We'll be. I'm sure we have like 26 missed messages on the chat.
Sarah Foster
What do you guys do? You guys just like sit around and.
Gwyneth Paltrow
Like, can't talk about it? Whatever.
Sarah Foster
You guys get a life.
Erin Foster
Okay?
Sarah Foster
I mean, what is this? You're just like, oh, the laundry detergent gp when you want to talk about real, call me up.
Erin Foster
Okay?
Gwyneth Paltrow
All right, guys, I love you both so much. Thank you.
Erin Foster
Thank you so much for having us.
Gwyneth Paltrow
It was so good to have you on here. Thanks for tuning in. This has been a presentation of Cadence 13 Studios. I hope you'll listen, follow, rate and review all of our episodes, which are available for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Odyssey or wherever you get your podcasts.
Host: Gwyneth Paltrow
Guests: Erin Foster, Sara Foster
Date: October 21, 2025
Episode Theme: Listen, learn, explore — Evolving Ambition, Sisterhood, and Authenticity with Erin & Sara Foster
In this lively, honest, and often hilarious conversation, Gwyneth Paltrow sits down with sisters Erin and Sara Foster—creators, entrepreneurs, and hosts of “The World’s First Podcast.” They delve into their intertwining personal and professional journeys, the challenges and breakthroughs of launching a successful clothing brand (Favorite Daughter), the realities of working with family, dramatic pivots (including stints in television and at Bumble), navigating fertility struggles, growing into self-acceptance, and the triumphs and vulnerabilities behind their hit Netflix show. The episode brims with wisdom for women pursuing purpose, meaningful work, and richer relationships—emphasizing that real fulfillment can flourish at any age.
On Authenticity & Self-Acceptance:
"Resisting the truth makes you go crazy...It took me a really long time to stop trying to be something else."
— Erin, [28:14]
On the Impact of Failure:
"I was very used to failing...So I was kind of comfortable in that zone...It wasn't something...that was going to define me the same way."
— Erin, [19:23]
On Partnership in Life & Work:
"Having a co-founder, right?...I wish that I had a co-founder. You know, I've had to build my business by myself as an artist. I was by myself."
— Gwyneth, [67:04]
On Faith and Letting Go:
"It might not work out how you want it to, but it will work out if you allow it to."
— Erin, [41:16]
On the Pressure for Young Women:
"The twenties are so inherently difficult...None of us know who the fuck we are..."
— Gwyneth, [58:13]
On Women's Success Trajectories:
"It's so exciting to see, and I think it sets such an amazing roadmap for other women...it's just so inspiring."
— Gwyneth, [66:08]
On Celebrating True Connection:
"I'm really inspired by you guys...I love seeing this incredible success blossoming in your 40s."
— Gwyneth, [66:08]
This episode is as warm, vulnerable, and irreverent as expected with these three sharp women. They’re unafraid to examine their shortcomings, crack jokes at their own (and each other’s) expense, and celebrate unlikely pivots. Listeners will find reassurance that circuitous paths and imperfect moments can lead to richer, more authentic success—and that it’s never “too late” to come into your own.
For listeners seeking inspiration on authentic living, creative risk, meaningful relationships, and the beauty of trusting your own timeline, this conversation is essential.