FIRE EPISODE🔥 How you treat your husband or boyfriend plays a huge role in the quality of the relationship. Typically one person teaches the other person how to treat them and what the dynamic of the relationship will be like.

Disclaimer: If you’re unhappy in your relationship, it’s most likely 1 of 2 things. Either you’re an unhappy individual who needs to work on yourself OR you’re with the wrong person.

Why do we treat our significant others poorly? Unresolved personal issues, lack of communication, unrealistic expectations, power dynamic, stress or burnout, lack of empathy, emotional immaturity, cultural differences, neglect of the relationship, lack of self awareness, toxic dynamic

What should you focus on to make your relationship better?

1. Resolving personal issues aka working on yourself. No one can fix you. This allows you to show up whole. When you show up whole to a relationship, the person you choose to be with is now part of your world instead of your whole world. One person can’t be your everything. Not only is that a lot of pressure, but it will put stress cracks on the relationship. Depending on yourself, knowing who you are and trusting yourself lead to confidence. Because you have done the work, you are able to identify why things are bothering, you have the words to put your emotions into context and can then communicate the issue rather than use further damaging tools such as passive aggressive, screaming, gas lighting, avoiding the topic altogether.

2. Communication. Communication can mitigate just about every other problem in a relationship.So many bigger issues pop up due to people not speaking up. No one is a mind reader. AND there is always a nice way to say what you want to say. Learning simple techniques like walking away and speaking it about it later when each person has cooled down or staying solution focused instead of blaming are easy ways to improve communication. Consider practicing what you need to say. Work on a short script, practice it and then think through the conversation to where it could go. Knowing the conversation can go multiple directions will help you recognize how you feel.

What does a healthy relationship look like? Open communication, mutual respect, trust and honesty, equality and partnership, healthy conflict resolution, support and encouragement, emotional and physical intimacy, individuality and independence, fun and joy, shared goals and values.

Important: give yourself permission to be in a healthy, happy, loving, fun, kind, trusting relationships. After leaving a toxic relationship, you are driven by chaos. The tumultuous ups and downs become normal which isn’t normal at all. The healthy relationship will feel boring and you will poke the bear for a reaction. Unconditional love is SUCH a beautiful thing. Unconditional love IS NOT treating someone poorly and expecting them to always be there. It's doing things for someone when it's inconvenient for you. It's caring for them when you are sick. It's putting their needs equal to their own.

Tangible action items to a healthier relationship: -Stop what you’re doing and greet him when he comes through the door. Give him your undivided attention -Make an effort to not be on your phones and have a conversation -Have date night once a week -Say I love you -speaking highly of him when he’s not around -The body will tell you how you feel about someone. In a healthy relationship you Hug, grab each other’s butt, cuddle, snuggle, hold hands. If you’re grossed out to do any of these, it’s time to go! -Simply choose to be all in, 100% and give yourself permission to have a happy relationship. -Hang out with friends who have quality relationships with their spouse, speak positively of them and are proud of them

Let's Connect

:📸 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool

🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool

🟥 Follow us on YouTube: @thehotgirlschool

TALK TO US! We want to hear from you!

💌 thehotgirlschool@gmail.com