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- [00:00]
A
This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on Marketplace and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for, from a browse to a bike ride this summer. Find more on Facebook.
- [00:31]
B
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A
You're saying YMCA summer camps are now allowing boys in girls cabins, the locker
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B
rooms, changing spaces, and then also overnight accommodations at camps. Either girls, boys, girls plus, boys plus, or all gender. What gives me the biggest chills? This also applies to counselors and supervisors. If your state does not specifically have a policy that is the same as Title nine, we're seeing it sneak in all over the place. It's also actually erasing the diversity of people because there go the tomboys and you're telling them that they're a boy based on the activities that they enjoy. It is actually doing the complete opposite of what they allegedly intend to be
- [01:41]
A
doing in the pursuit of radical self acceptance, which has always been so ironic to me. Ali Murray, I'm so excited to have you join us on the Isabel Brown show today with the American Parents Coalition. You guys are fighting so many important battles on behalf of families, kids and parents alike, and in particular against the YMCA right now, which I really want to get into about protecting kids at summer camp, women's in women's facilities and girls in girls sports. We'll get into all of that, but first, can you just give us a little brief overview as to who you are and what you do for apc?
- [02:12]
B
Yeah. So our organization, American Parents Coalition, is focused on providing resources for parents so that we can parent in real time. We do a lot of public policy work to kind of affect change on the broader scale. But we noticed that a lot of organizations were kind of leaving out the part that, you know, we also have to make these decisions for our kids and our families every day. So on our website, we provide a ton of resources for parents to be able to have those conversations with your local ymca, sports league, doctor's office, et CETERA while our organization does the kind of backend work advocating for the public policy because oftentimes those two things just
- [02:47]
A
don't travel at the same speed 100%. And honestly so important for young parents like me who have come into the realm of parenting and not really realizing how insanely controversial and politically charged just day to day decisions over your kids life has become in the last couple of decades. I never remember my parents having to go on offense and to bat in our doctor's office or with our school or with after school rec sports at the, at the rec center in our neighborhood. And yet that is what young parents are having to deal with every day. You guys are fighting a lot of these battles right now against the YMCA in particular, which I think is shocking to a lot of people that the YMCA has, has become this battleground for the protection of girls in girl sports, of women in women's only spaces, and in protecting the rights of women everywhere under Title IX in America in particular. What is going on with the YMCA and what battles are you guys fighting on that front?
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B
So the biggest thing that parents need to know is that in many of the locker rooms, changing spaces, and then also overnight accommodations at camps, these spaces are no longer just women's and girls spaces and men and boys spaces. And it's not necessarily always just happening in those quote, blue states. If your state does not specifically have a policy that is, you know, the same as Title ix, we're seeing it sneak in all over the place. So about a year ago we put out a report that was much more focused on the locker rooms. So instances and examples, because we were seeing these stories pop up all over the country of women who were complaining about men and boys in their locker rooms. And, and the YMCA had slowly started adopting policies that were based on gender identity instead of sex. And when women were bringing these issues forward, they'd go to the front desk and say, hey, there's a man in here. I'm in here with my 8 year old daughter. The Y would say, well they identify as a female and they have every right to be there and you can leave if it makes you uncomfortable. And so we noticed this kind of popping up all over the place and compiled a report and put that out to our parent subscribers so that they would be aware that they needed to start asking these questions.
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A
Wow. Can you tell us any particular stories that come to the top of mind of instances like this happening?
- [05:02]
B
One that got a lot of attention was out in Washington state. There was an elderly woman who was in Changing her clothes after swimming. And she noticed that there was a man in there also changing his clothes, and he was watching two girls who were changing their swimsuits. And she went out to the front desk and told them that this was happening. Same thing that we just discussed. Oh, well, he identifies as a female, so he has every right to be there. And not only did they not do anything about it, but the woman who complained lost her membership from the ymc. She was kicked out.
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A
Are you serious?
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B
Kicked out? And that's not an isolated incident. A very similar thing has happened in Oregon. It's happened in Connecticut, all over the country. And so we noticed these things happening, put out that report so that parents across the country could be asking these questions. But what's particularly offensive about the ymca? Of course they have, you know, the Christian origin, which would make you ask those questions. But the YMCA is publicly funded to the tune of $600 million a year. That's taxpayer money. And so what makes this example much different than something like a Planet Fitness or a Gold's Gym is that there actually is an enforcement mechanism to make sure that women and girls are protected in private spaces and in summer camps, because if you're not complying with Title ix, which is a federal law, which the YMCA is not, then they should not be eligible for that money. So that has been the nexus of our argument that there actually is an enforcement mechanism, and we should be making an example of the YMCA because we can tell them that they can't do this.
- [06:33]
A
That's a fascinating concept, because I remember reading about a similar story out of Planet Fitness. I think it was in New Hampshire a few weeks ago. A gal came out of the locker room and went to the front desk, said, this man is in the locker room, and he's being incredibly creepy to all of the women in there. The man identified as a woman, and they took her Planet Fitness membership away. Lo and behold, the guy was a registered sex offender and had previously had all kinds of crazy atrocities committed against women. But she was the one in the wrong, obviously. And yet it's a private business, Right? So everybody in the comments section was saying, well, I don't really know what to do about that. I don't know how we can enforce something like that. The Title 9 argument has been invoked across the country a lot over various elements of this conversation for the past several years, but it hasn't really, I've seen, been enforced in a meaningful way across the board as of yet, with some good offense happening from the Trump administration. Over this last year and a half or so, where can we be more on offense from that conversation standpoint?
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B
So I think we had a huge victory a few weeks ago with the Supreme Court decision. Now, of course, that was narrowly defined to sports, but if you're extrapolating on that same reasoning, it is very fair to say that this would also apply to private spaces. And so I think that we're just now going to move to the next phase of that argument. I think when Title IX was formed in its infancy in the early 70s, I don't think anyone ever foresaw having to separate those two parts of the conversation. But here we are. And that's, I think, one of the places where our organization is helpful because the public policy is not keeping up with what we're seeing. Parenting in real time. Like, parents need to understand, A, that this is a problem and B, you don't have to sit there and take it. And our daughters deserve better and they rely on us to be their advocates. What 8 year old girl is going to be confronted with that? And when the adult tells them that this is how it is and this is the policy, they don't know better. And that's up to us as parents to be able to protect our kids and make sure they're being provided with, with equal opportunity and also not being discriminated against. And one thing that's very important in Title IX 2 is that there doesn't need to be a physical altercation or assault in order for it to be discrimination. Discrimination has been applied very broadly and for good reason. When the accommodation is putting undue burden on the girl, that is discrimination. So when these girls are coming home from summer camp saying, I never want to go back there again, there was a boy in my cabin watching me change, that is the person who is discriminated against. And so these are the arguments that we now need to bring into the courtroom to have that second round of the conversation following the recent Title IX victory for sports.
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A
I've heard you mention summer camp a couple of times, which breaks my heart because I am a summer camp kid through and through. I grew up going to the same camp for 10 years. I ended up working there when I was in college. It was my favorite place in the world. And I often say we moved around so much when I was a kid and I changed schools all the time. Everything was constantly in flux. But the one constant I had throughout my entire entire childhood was camp. It was my safe space. It was the place I could go to be my truest self and have my best, best friends in the world. And I always longed to share that with my children. Unfortunately, my camp, not a YMCA camp, has gone full in the woke direction associated with a lot of this stuff. They do a lot of the pro LGBTQ plus pride, everything now. And it's just not a place I could ever imagine sending my daughter, which is tragic. But there's an interesting component here with YMCA camps, because I knew a lot of people who grew up every summer going to YMCA camp. It was favorite thing in the entire world. It had a religious, Christian element typically associated with it. And you're saying YMCA summer camps are now allowing boys in girls cabins?
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B
That's right. So many of the camps across the country have cabins that are either girls, boys, girls plus, boys plus, or all gender. And then there are even some camps where when you register, you're not even prompted to put male, female, or your identification. It's just age based. And so that's why we really stress to families like, you really, truly need to do your due diligence and ask these questions, because it could be anything. And also, the other complicating factor is that many of these camps don't necessarily have a parental notification policy in place either. So if you go into it signing your daughter up for a girl's cabin, they may be roomed with a boy who identifies as a girl. And you wouldn't necessarily know about it until your daughter comes home or calls you.
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A
Honestly, I have no idea how these people sleep at night and still call themselves progressives when they're destroying women's rights day in and day out. But I'll tell you how I slept last night. Incredibly well. Ever since my family finally switched to a Helix mattress about a year ago, I honestly didn't realize how much sleep I was losing until I became a mom. You kind of realize it throughout pregnancy, and then postpartum hits you really quickly and all bets are off. And now, between a toddler waking up in the middle of the night, the early mornings, and the schedule that just never really slows down, I was constantly running on empty. I'd wake up really groggy. I'd hit snooze a whole lot more than once. Sorry, it's my husband, you know? You know? And I just need way too much coffee to feel like myself throughout the day. But since we switched to a Helix mattress, my sleep has completely changed. And what I love the most about Helix is they understand everyone sleeps differently. So they have more than 20 different mattress options. So whether you're a side sleeper, a back sleeper, a hot sleeper, or just a tired parent who needs better rest. There is an option designed for you. They ship straight to your front door for free. You get 120 night sleep trial and and they're happy with Helix guarantee, makes it completely risk free so you can try it out for yourself. They're also the most awarded mattress brand out there. If your sleep is off right now, your whole day is probably off and it's easy to fix. Head to helixsleep.com isabel for 27% off site wide.
- [12:19]
B
There's another part to this which I think is probably what gives me the biggest chills. This also applies to counselors and supervisors. So you could send your 8 year old daughter off to her first overnight camp and she could have a counselor that's a male who identifies as a female as her, like, you know, bunk room leader. And I can think of no greater invasion of privacy, of safety than having my kid in that situation. And so it's really, really important for parents. And this is the ymca, a once Christian organization. And so if you are sending your kid to any summer camp, any overnight summer camp, you have to be asking these questions because if you're not, you have no idea what you're gonna get.
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A
How are parents finding out their daughters are just and saying, mommy, I had a man as a counselor living in my room the whole time.
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B
Some of it is that and some of it is in the signup process because you'll see, you know, the prompt is, how does your son or daughter identify instead of like checking the box for sex. And so for conservative leaning parents who kind of get that code language, you know, they then know to start asking the questions. But yeah, for people who aren't paying attention, oftentimes it's a text or a phone call from their child when they're there or when they come home. And they say, you know, we went around the circle on the first day and said our names and pronouns, which is just not, you know, what the YMCA camp experience was like when I was growing up?
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A
No, not at all. You said that there are a couple different classifications for cabins. You guys have found. There's girls and boys, which is the obvious, but there's also girls plus, boys plus and all gender. What does that mean?
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B
It's very much what it sounds like. So you could be in a cabin that is allegedly exclusively biological.
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A
Girls. Okay.
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B
Then there's girls plus, which means it could be girls or it could be boys who identify as girls. And then there's all gender, which is just the age based, kind of free for all. And so depending on the camp, the region of the country, the state, their state laws, they're kind of picking and choosing. But one thing that I think is very interesting is we've been on this for a year now where we've been calling out the YMCA over and over and over again for these policies. And they try to make the distinction that every state has different laws when it comes to gender and gender identity. And they're following the state's laws. But as a recipient of Title IX funding or as a recipient. Yes, of Title IX funding to the extent of $600 million a year, they have to comply with Title IX. And so when they're not providing those sex segregated spaces for males and females, they're not eligible for that money.
- [15:04]
A
Fascinating. Yes. Okay, this is interesting to me because there was currently over the last couple of months a huge debate over all of these state laws related to my home state of Colorado and a summer camp that was right near my hometown that I knew many, many people who grew up going there over this idea of sex specific spaces. And the camp is Christian in nature. Basically the state of Colorado is arguing you're violating state law. You have to accommodate for gender identity. They said no. It ended up escalating all the way to the Supreme Court. Incredible conversation surrounding all of this. But the federal law trumping state law is the fascinating concept here because these YMCA camps arguably only exist because of that taxpayer funding that they're receiving. Is that right?
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B
That's right. And we, in our report, we looked into specifically whether or not these branches have received federal funding. Because you know, if you were going to give them benefit of the doubt, maybe they didn't route their federal funding to Oregon, but they did the transfers there. So these are branches that have funding for from United States taxpayers and therefore must comply with federal law.
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A
Are you finding that it's only the camps in the blue states allowing for some of this stuff or is it kind of across the board ymca?
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B
There's certainly some purple ones too. Like Pennsylvania has a few camps that they. Pennsylvania has a full on YMCA pride camp in addition.
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A
Sorry, what?
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B
Yes, they have a pride camp. Not just, you know, your typical YMCA camp with, with the co ed housing. They have a full on pride camp. So there, there is a lot all across the country. It is not just in the blue states. However, it is easier to find many more examples there.
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A
You're absolutely right. I had to look this up because I didn't believe IT Pride Camp is a new opportunity to serve LGBTQ campers in a safe space non gendered village where they can form lasting bonds through their shared stories. In addition to customary camp activities and fun, our Pride campers will have special daily programming as a group slam poetry night, social justice conversations, mindfulness workshops and writing and arts workshops. There's also family camps surrounding a Pride Family Camp May 8th through May 10th happened this year and Adult Camp Adult pride camp for individuals 18 plus. That is wild.
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B
Another nugget on the parental notification side of this. So if your son or daughter goes to camp and decides while they are there that they are no longer who they were when they got there, the why doesn't necessarily share that information with the parents upon sending them back home. A lot of their safe space policies would preclude them from doing that. Another piece of this that's really interesting in terms of the national organization and the federal funding side of it is anytime the Y has actually been pressed to respond to charges from us, they lean back on the different states. But then they also say that we YUSA do not provide guidance. Every branch has to operate the way that they would. However, they had guidance on their website, which they deleted when we put out our first report. They deleted it within 1215 hours. They took it down. And then when we did our second report this summer, we found that their YMCA Digital Services has a website that each of the branches can use as like a template. When they set up your Powhatan county ymca, you can use the YMCA corporate branch template on it. It has their DEI policy and all this stuff and it has all of that language already built in with that guidance. And then there are also little nuggets like we talked about. The girls plus and boys plus cabins and all of the YMCAs who have those policies, they call it the same thing across the country. So that's coming from somewhere. I can't imagine that the Oregon YMCA is on a conference call organically with the Connecticut YMCA and saying what should we call our summer camps? That has to originate from somewhere. So there's a lot more going on behind the scenes on the corporate side of this that the YMCA is really hiding the ball on. That I think deserves some further scrutiny.
- [19:14]
A
Oh, 100%. I'm actually really glad you brought this up because I found that website that they had taken down. I think it was Originally Posted in 2017 July 3, 2017 how to create a safe space for LGBTQ campers by the entire YUSA staff that is the author of this webpage that existed on just ymca.org their their national organization's website. They say that the 30% of LGBTQ+ youths have attempted suicide and LGBTQ/ youth are nearly five times more likely to have attempted suicide in comparison to heterosexual youth. So how can youth development professionals AKA summer camp staff create a safe and welcoming environment for all children and teens? And they give nine specific recommendations on their website for how camps should be accommodating for this first, recognize that every child is unique in their self identity across all dimensions of diversity. No two people are the same. Include all of this in the conversation. The Intersectionality piece Number two Be an ally, support and celebrate openly LGBTQ staff, youth and families. I wish more parents knew that was a mandate from the national organization. Number three Work to confound gender based assumptions regarding toys, activities and attire. Use gender neutral language and invite all children to participate in all activities. Avoid assuming that boys prefer to play sports and girls prefer to make arts and crafts. 4. Ensure all campers and staff have access to the facilities aligned with their gender identity and comfort staff you mentioned earlier that is horrifying to think of. 5. Provide training opportunities to foster education, awareness and knowledge building. 6. Use gender neutral pronouns when referencing guardians slash parents, partners, families and significant others. So no mom or dad, right? Just, I don't know, unspecified parent of some kind? Caregiver wild. 7. Lift up stories of LGBTQ plus inclusion in training, marketing and camp activities. Do your camp marketing or training materials include people from all walks of life, including same sex couples, families or transgender individuals. 8. Celebrate Pride Month while you're at camp in June. June is the official month, but Pride can be celebrated year round. Communicate early and often that your camp is a safe space for LGBTQ youth, families and communities and 9 build partnerships with local organizations that serve the LGBTQ community such as houses of worship, health care centers and educational institution. At the Y we believe that a diverse world makes us stronger when we are inclusive and our doors are open to all. Parents have no idea that's going on.
- [21:49]
B
No clue. No clue. And here's the thing that's that's so messed up about it is that it's that false argument that diversity must be about, you know, gender and sexuality. We as human beings are fascinating people and everyone is so unique. And I know for me the Y stuff always hits really, really close to home because I grew up probably the top patron in my county at the Y. I was there every single day after school. I would not have played college sports if I didn't spend two, three hours a day at the Y playing basketball. And so I was so looking forward to my kids growing up and having that, that same experience. And at no point when I was at the Y did anyone ever ask me anything about my identity.
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A
Why would you?
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B
Because I liked basketball and I was a girl there to play, pick up basketball with the boys. Nobody thought I was a boy. You know, it's. You as a human being are unique and beautiful and you are interested in your own things just as much as the person next to you is. And there are so many ways to celebrate the uniqueness and the individuality of a person without ever touching gender identity and leaving conversations like that to your familial structure and still being able to celebrate the uniqueness of every single person. And it's just, it's wild that this is what it's become.
- [23:05]
A
And on the note of fighting for our kids, if you guys have been following me for any amount of time, you probably know how important fighting for our preborn babies are in the pro life movement is to me too. Right now, somewhere in America, there's a young woman who's sitting alone. Maybe she's in the parking lot of an abortion clinic. Maybe she's sitting in the waiting room scrolling through her phone. She's looking for answers. She's looking for someone, anyone, just to help. And that's exactly where our friends at Live Action come into play. They meet women at that exact moment before the abortion, before a life ending decision is made. They put truth and hope right in front of the women who need to hear it the most. We spend a lot of time talking about how to change our country's laws surrounding abortion. And that's really important. But ultimately, it's not laws that change hearts. And that's what Live Action is focused on, changing everyday. Live Action reaches millions of people online with stories that remind moms they are not alone, that their baby has value and that there is hope for them. One in five women who see Live Action's content decide not to have an abortion. Think about that. One video, one message, one single moment of hope can save a baby's life and change the entire trajectory of their Future. For about 50, you can reach another woman searching for answers. You can be the reason that she chooses life for her baby. If you feel that need to help too, you can text Isabel to 70723 or visit liveaction.org donate Isabel what uniquely terrifies me as a parent now, but especially knowing the autonomy that you experience
- [24:27]
B
as a kid at Camp that's what
- [24:29]
A
part of the magic of camp is, that it's all about being a kid, but on your own, right? Your parents aren't there, and you get to have this unique, independent experience. This idea of the lack of parental notification is terrifying, because I'm wondering, based on these mandate guidelines provided by the national organization that they sweep under the rug and they pretend don't exist, how often do you think kids are being told by their counselors, oh, you're a girl who likes to wear pants. You're a girl who isn't super into glittery dresses and princesses, and instead you want to go pick up bugs outside like we did all the time in the mountains of summer camp. That makes you a boy, actually. You may have never been told that before, but I'm here to enlighten you because your evil, oppressive parents would never have this conversation with you. You're actually a boy, and we can help you change your name and your pronouns and all of these things while you're here at camp. How often do you think that's happening?
- [25:18]
B
I think it's probably happening a lot. And what's interesting, too, is that it's also actually erasing the diversity of people, because there go the tomboys and the girls who like to dig in the dirt and look for bugs, and you're telling them that they're a boy based on the activities that they enjoy. It is actually doing the complete opposite of what they allegedly intend to be doing. And I'm sure it happens a lot more than we're even hearing about, because these kids come home and it remains a conversation within the family. And in most cases, I'm sure parents are able to either nip that in the bud or have the conversation with their family and their local YMCA and not send their kids back. Back. But, yeah, it's a real worry. It's a real worry.
- [26:02]
A
You know, I hate to even bring this back up to Colorado because sadly, they've become the blueprint for how crazy the country can get. It makes me very sad. That's my home state. It's not the place I grew up. But in states like Colorado, they're even passing laws. I think this exists in Washington and California, too, where in school, if your child decides to start identifying as the opposite sex, that you can have the state take custody of your children away from you. If you do not agree with that at home and you misgender or deadname your child at home, do you see a path where that could also include extracurricular activities or Summer camp as well.
- [26:37]
B
It wouldn't surprise me, but I have not seen that yet. But it is part of the growing larger trend of what you said, where we're kind of putting a magnifying glass on the autonomy of a child and saddling them with expectations and responsibility that far exceeds their physical human development. Children are not able to make those types of decisions yet. My kids, I have four kids. They're all eight and under, and some days they tell me they're a cat. They are not cats. They are watching my cat lick her paws and they lick their wrists. It just is kids being kids. And to think that your child being in an environment where many of the things that we've talked about are being normalized and them thinking that that is the way that it is. And then you get a trusting adult. The people who these kids are looking up to, whether it be a camp counselor, a librarian at the school, a sports coach who's telling them that, oh, this is normal, this is the way of the world. I mean, it's very easy to see how a child can start down that path and then to have the school step in and affirm that child and tell them that their parents are wrong as they enter teen angst. Right. I mean, it's very easy to see that pipeline. And it is extremely dangerous.
- [28:00]
A
Oh, yeah. I mean, I disagreed with my mom about the color of the sky when I was 15. Right. That was such a normal experience as a teenage girl. And I have a daughter. I'm sure I will be karmically repaid for all of that someday when she's a teenager. But I can't imagine someone taking advantage of that vulnerable state that I was in to destroy my life, destroy my health, destroy everything about myself in the pursuit of radical self acceptance, which has always been so ironic to me. You mentioned summer camp. We talked a little bit about adults being kicked out of their YMCA memberships. But you grew up playing after school sports at the Y and wanted to share that with your kids. Are we seeing any of this creep into the recreational sports and extracurricular activities side of things, too?
- [28:40]
B
Oh, absolutely. We did a report last year where we focused on some of the bigger sports leagues, like AAU and the like, and what they were doing as far as their gender policies. Some have since changed their tune a little bit once the Trump administration came in, changed back Title IX and made some of those broader landscape adjustments. We have seen a handful of organizations kind of pivot back and do the right thing, but it's very much on a case by case basis. And I would actually caution parents to not assume that it has swung back, because I think that is the natural tendency for many of us who do care about this issue but aren't involved in it. Day to day, you think, oh, okay, well, you know, President Trump is in charge. He's made this executive order, and Title IX says this, so it must be fine. But as we've been talking about with the ymca, that doesn't necessarily mean these organizations are complying, especially if it's a private organization. So if your child is part of a private sports league that's not receiving Title IX funding, you absolutely need to be asking those questions, because there's no enforcement mechanism there, except for angry parents.
- [29:49]
A
We talk a lot about women's sports right now, I've realized, and for good reason, obviously, because of very courageous people like one of my dear friends, Riley Gaines, and the headway that we've made in protecting professional women's sports and collegiate women's sports. Occasionally I'll see headlines about a high schooler who might be protesting a boy on her track team or her swimming team. And that's tragic and insane that teenagers are still having to deal with this. But we rarely, rarely, rarely ever talk about little girls in sports with this conversation. Is that a problem that you're seeing and what do you think psychologically that's doing to the next generation of kids?
- [30:24]
B
I really do. I think it's cutting girls out of the sports pipeline in its infancy. So when you think about, you know, girls, especially in the youth sports age group, you know, fifth grade to eighth grade, middle school, when you are just entering puberty, when your body is changing a ton, and that's, of course, the pubescent changes, but also, like, you're gaining muscle and you're becoming a better runner and you're stronger, and everything in your world is changing. That is when in the sports world, there's a lot of ebb and flow of who makes the team, who gets cut. And so when you're thinking about the girls that those sports teams are most important for. If you're looking at a basketball team, it's the girls that would be in spots nine through 12. Those last couple girls on the team, those are the ones who stand to benefit the most from the physical activity, the camaraderie of the team, the jokes on the bus to and from games, the mentorship from the coach and those relationships. And those last few girls are the first ones to get cut. When we bring a transgender person onto the team because they're on the Cusp and they no longer have a spot at the team. So we spend a lot of time focused on the girls on the podium, and rightfully so. They have earned those spots. They deserve them. But the girls on the Cusp are the ones who really get left behind. And if you get cut in sixth or seventh grade, statistics show that's it, you're done. Like your self esteem is already in the tank as a 1112 year old girl. And if someone's telling you you're not good enough, then you're not gonna go back. And there are countless statistics. If you're looking at women in leadership positions, 94% of women in C suite jobs played sports. And that that is not a fluke. So sports is so much bigger for women than going on to play in the WNBA or be an Olympic athlete. And those are crucially important. But the women who go on to be our business leaders, who are nonprofit leaders, who are PTA moms, these are women who grew up learning leadership skills, camaraderie, teamwork, and the ability to talk to each other from sports. And we are slashing that pipeline at 10 years old. And I think it's one of the biggest disservices to this next generation and
- [32:37]
A
calling it feminism, ironically, in the meantime, as a mom of a daughter, that breaks my heart because I can't imagine how many little girls today are being reinforced at a very, very early age, this backdoor misogyny, actually, that men not only are better at sports than you are because they're men, men also make the best women, and they are the best women's athletes or the best female campers or the best counselors or the best teachers. That's insane to me that we are raising an entire generation of little girls to look at men as their school counselor, their summer camp counselor, their sports coach, their teammates, and to reinforce I'm less than that, or somehow I don't have the autonomy or the freedom to say, I'm not okay with that even. Back to it with Ali in just a second. But first, one of the coolest things about building an audience online is seeing you guys become a real community of real people. It all starts with the same people watching your videos or listening to your podcast over and over again. And before long, you guys have shown up at events, you've worn my merch, you've shared our message, and become a part of something so much bigger than just you and. And me. Since joining the Daily Wire, that's also been my experience. Here with dw and one of my favorite ways to see that is with the Daily Wire store. Whether it's seeing you guys wear our apparel out in airports, reading our books out and about, or even rocking your favorite leftist tears tumbler on the go, it's so cool to see people support the creators and causes that they genuinely care about. And the reason that experience is so smooth is because it's all powered by Shopify. Whether you're launching your first product or you're managing a store with thousands of customers, Shopify gives you everything you need to to start selling from day one. And when your customers are ready to buy, the Shopify checkout feature helps make more of them actually complete their purchase because returning customers can check out with just one tap with their information already saved. That's why so many entrepreneurs, creators and brands trust Shopify. They handle all the behind the scenes work so that you can spend less time focusing on your website and more time building your community and growing your business. Whatever you're passionate about, Shopify helps you turn that passion into something real and you can start your free trial@shopify.com Isabel what can the average parent of a daughter do at home to make sure that they're equipping their kids to fight against this appropriately?
- [34:48]
B
I think the first thing is making sure that you have a broad understanding of your social circle. Your digital parental controls is a huge one. You know, you may think that as a family your child understands your values and you know, you have your kitchen table conversations and your rules. But if you hand your kid a device that does not have parental controls or a device at all, you know, before a certain age you're playing with fire. And I know that's not always a popular thing to say because kids want to stay in touch with each other, whatever, but you need to find a way to really lock that down and have those conversations. Because the ideology is so pervasive among young kids because of the pipeline that we've discussed, it's going to find its way into your home. And then the other side of that is if you're not having conversations about it explicitly at a certain age, I would not recommend at preschool, of course, but once your child starts playing sports, when there are opportunities to have those conversations, when you come across these types of scenarios in the wild, talk to your child about it too. Don't just go and handle it on your own as a parent, which you should do, but have those conversations with your kid too, so that they feel confident in the decision that your family is making and understand the why, because they are gonna get questions as well. Like you as the parent are gonna get pushback from the league, from other parents, but your kid is too. And so to make sure that they're really bought in and understand the why and what you're doing to protect them and to promote your family values, they have to be explicit conversations. You can't just take it on faith that they agree and understand. And then the final plea I'd make for that is, we need our dads. Oftentimes sports kind of falls in the, quote, dad portfolio. And our dads, like, nobody should have more pride in protecting the privacy of their daughter and preserving the innocence of a little girl. And I think oftentimes most of the communication to and from schools or sports teams or whatever falls into the realm of the moms. And we have a lot of mama bears that have come forward and are standing up for this and they cannot stop. Like, you know, we have to stay on this. But it's different when it comes from dad, it's different when it comes from five dads. It's different when it comes from united parental forces. And so we need our dads to really join the conversation here. And you know, every dad I talk to that feels this way is like, oh yeah, go get em. And I'm like, what did you do? Did you talk to your daughter's sports team? And so that's not to disparage involvement or lack thereof. It's to empower dads to join us in this fight because we really need you.
- [37:33]
A
Oh, absolutely. You know, it reminds me, I saw a great TikTok video a few days ago of a dad who was standing in his backyard and talking into the camera, basically saying the same thing, that it has to be up to dads to say, we are done telling our daughters lies. And he told the story of his three year old daughter sitting in the backseat and they went through a drive through for fast food a few days prior. And the guy that was taking their order for the drive through was clearly a man who had breast implants and was wearing a dress. And from the back seat after they left, he didn't say anything, he didn't make a comment. He paid the guy and went to the next window to to collect their food. After they left the first window, his daughter said, daddy, what's wrong with that man? She's three years old. So a three year old can observe that, like something is wrong here. And he said, I didn't initially know how to respond, but I didn't want to lie to my daughter. I wanted to be honest with her. And so I turned around and I said, honey, I don't know, but I will tell you right now. Me as a dad and everyone else as a dad, we cannot say what society expects us to say, which is actually that's a woman. And it doesn't matter that you can see his Adam's apple, and it doesn't matter if he has a beard, and it doesn't matter if you know that that's a man, but you have to appease whatever their feelings are that actually that's a woman. I'm not gonna lie to my kid, and I don't think three years old is too young for me to be honest with her. I don't know what's wrong with that man. I can't intimately relate empathetically with the struggle of gender dysphoria, but I'm not gonna lie to my kid. And that was so empowering listening to that, because I've never seen dads talk about it that way, especially on the Internet. There's a lot of moms trying to shield their daughters from a lot of this craziness with the trans movement, but I rarely do see dad's way in.
- [39:02]
B
Yep, we need more.
- [39:03]
A
How about apc? What is American Parents Coalition doing from a policy perspective to keep fighting against some of this? And where can we keep supporting you guys, too?
- [39:11]
B
So for the Y explicitly, we have sent a letter to each of the agencies that fund the Y, so hhs, the Department of Education, and also hud, and asked them to review that federal funding. We have had conversations with one of those agencies, so I don't want to get out in front of that, but I'm hopeful that that will be fruitful. And of course, we've seen the great work that the administration has done from the executive order side of things, so I'm hopeful with that. We've also sent a letter to the Hill requesting that they do some investigative work on the funding as well. So for the Y, we're hopeful we're making some progress there, and of course, I'll continue to be a pain for them. More broadly, we do a lot of work looking at parental notes, codification laws. We talked a little bit about what's going on in the schools. That kind of tends to be a state by state fight, but would love for that to be codified into a broader federal policy. And then we also do a lot with digital content and streaming and parental controls, and we have a Lot of resources for parents on all of those issues on our website, americanparentscoalition.org so as the organizations, ours and others have the fights on the public policy side, there are a lot of tools that parents can use to have those conversations with their school, with their ymca, their local whatever, where these fights are happening in real time. And also resources for you to be able to talk to your friends and peers and have good language and talking points so that you're not feeling like you're totally shooting from the hip, you've got a policy primer and you know what's going on to, to the degree where you're comfortable talking to a neighbor about it in like a not weird way.
- [40:50]
A
Last question for you is an important one because I think there's something really to be said about changing these institutions. We can't just build a parallel economy of providing the conservative version or the Christian version of whatever. If we really want to change culture, you have to go into the heart of culture and change it from the inside out. So nothing would make me happier than if the YMCA became a haven for protecting girls and girls sports. But that's not realistic for right now. So where can parents look for alternative options for their kids to be involved in summer camp and after school sports? Going to the rec center and just having a safe place to experience childhood.
- [41:23]
B
Yeah, this varies so much by location. You just, you have to ask questions, questions, questions. We have some good guides for like what questions you should ask and then, you know, anything that's of interest to you. Put that down on your desk. Ask those questions. I wanted to send one of our kids to a nature camp this summer. And I'm thinking, okay, biology, and they're digging in a stream and this and that. And one of the first registration questions is how does your kid identify? And I'm like, how can I trust you to explain the frog you're dissecting and what my child is seeing when you can't apply that same scientific understanding to, you know, to their, their gender. And so I, I raised that example because no, unfortunately no area is safe at this point. You have to ask the questions for everything. If you're sending your kid to a private school, you gotta ask those questions as well. And you know, just be very diligent and find a good group of friends and neighbors who share your values so that you can share and patronize the organizations that do have that.
- [42:32]
A
Well, it was always my retirement dream to run a summer camp maybe that has up to protect our kids since all these camps have gone so unbelievably woke. Ally, thank you so much for joining us on the show. Thank you for the work that you're doing with the American Parents Coalition, and it's our honor to keep supporting you guys in your fight for our kids.
- [42:49]
B
Thanks for having me. What if a few minutes with God could change the direction of your entire Day? With pray.com you can begin each morning with powerful daily prayers, inspiring Bible stories, and messages created to strengthen your faith. Whether you need peace, encouragement, or a fresh start, pray.com helps you make prayer part of your everyday Life. Download the Pray.com app today.