Stop Giving Your Best To Everyone Else ft. Thomas Rhett

Summary

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Episode: Thomas Rhett: Stop Giving Your Best To Everyone Else
Date: June 9, 2026
Host: Jefferson Fisher
Guest: Thomas Rhett

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Overview

This episode of The Jefferson Fisher Podcast features a candid, insightful conversation between host Jefferson Fisher and multi-platinum country music star Thomas Rhett. At its heart, the episode explores the tension between public success and private fulfillment, the importance of prioritizing family over professional demands, and the ongoing journey of self-improvement, faith, and authenticity. Thomas shares stories from his upbringing, the reality of marriage and parenthood in the spotlight, actionable communication strategies, and the need to give the best of oneself to those who matter most—at home.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Family First: Who Gets the Best Version of You?

• Main idea: Both Jefferson and Thomas reflect on the sad irony that we’re often our best selves for strangers, but not for our closest loved ones.
  • Notable Quote (Thomas Rhett, 00:30 & 36:01):
    “I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most.”
  • Thomas shares the challenge of being the best version of himself at home, not just in public.
  • The notion of “work-life balance” is challenged—Thomas argues instead for presence:
    “I don’t believe in work-life balance. I believe that you have to sort of be 100% committed where your feet are.” (00:51 & 36:24)

2. Life with a New Son: Parenting and Generational Insight

• Thomas shares his excitement about having a newborn son after accepting he might have only daughters, recounting funny family anecdotes and a string of prophetic dreams predicting they’d have a boy.
  • “We didn’t find out until the day of the birth... the ultimate surprise.” (02:52)
  • Thomas describes parenting as a learning process and talks about the evolving relationship with all his kids—oldest through youngest.
  • The hosts swap stories about being the oldest sibling and the different dynamics of raising children (19:36–20:58).

3. Upbringing and Work Ethic

• Jefferson shares about growing up as a fifth-generation attorney, being trained via the Socratic method—always being asked questions to see different perspectives instead of being given answers (04:31–05:41).
• Thomas shares about his country music legacy, his father’s influence, and his own path into music:
  • “I always loved to be on stage… I just loved to make people smile and make people laugh and dance.” (08:20)
• He details how he navigated following in his father’s footsteps while also finding his own authentic style.

4. Crafting a Unique Lane in Country Music

• The evolution of Thomas Rhett’s career, from early songwriting sessions to developing his “lane” that didn’t always fit the traditional country mold but connected due to his authenticity (13:43–14:22).
• The songwriting process is explored—having the courage to float “bad” ideas, and how grace and ego (or lack thereof) in sessions are crucial for creativity (17:03–18:09).

5. Marriage & Shared Reality versus Social Perception

• Thomas discusses the public’s “couple goals” image of him and Lauren, and the pressure to live up to that—even as a regular couple with regular challenges:
  • "When that is your perception, you sort of innately come back into your house and... kind of in your mind go, but I thought we were the perfect family, right?" (31:30)
• Jefferson notes how difficult it is to live up to “the expert” title when real-life arguments and messy moments occur (34:21–35:03).

6. Communication: At Home and In Work

• Both speakers highlight the necessity of honest, regular communication with their wives and families to prevent overcommitment and resentment:
  • Thomas on decision fatigue and overscheduling:
    “I’m not a good communicator. I’m one of those people that will say yes to a million things and get super fired up about this thing and super fired up about this. And then I get home and I’m like, oh, I really need to talk to Lauren about this.” (41:17)
  • Both agree on the value of a regular family “calendar meeting” where all opportunities or commitments are run through their wives (44:09).

7. Unlearning the “Yes” Reflex; Embracing No

• Thomas shares a transformative piece of advice from Miranda Lambert:
  • “There is no such thing as a country music emergency.” (40:52)
  • He explains the freedom and clarity that comes from realizing not every good opportunity is the right one, and how unlearning the reflex to always say yes has improved his life and family dynamics (41:13–41:33).

8. Faith, Identity, and COVID

• Thomas opens up about the evolution of his faith and personal identity, especially in the past few years and throughout COVID:
  • “As hard as it [COVID] was, God did so many things in my life that year that I did not know they were happening while they were happening.” (46:15)
• Discusses how faith and the stripping away of career trappings led him back to the primary roles of husband, father, and friend.

9. The Gifts We Live By

• A powerful reflection, quoting John Maxwell’s mentor (47:29), on humility and using your gifts as a way of serving, not self-glorification:
  • “You are not amazing. Your gifts are amazing. But those gifts were given freely to you.” (paraphrased, 48:06)
• Rhett now feels compelled to be more vocal about his faith, seeing it as central to his evolving identity and music.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Thomas Rhett on Prioritizing Family:
  “If your wife feels loved and known, if your kids feel loved and known and seen, all of a sudden when you walk out the door to go to work, your family’s going, go get them dad.” (37:53)

• Jefferson Fisher on Public vs. Private Persona:
  “Here I have a platform where I talk about how to have good communication and how to handle conflict... and then it’s really easy to get into a disagreement because you’re married to another human.” (34:21)

• Thomas Rhett on Saying No:
  “Just because it’s a good opportunity doesn’t mean it’s the best opportunity.” (41:33)

• Miranda Lambert’s wisdom via Thomas Rhett:
  “There is no such thing as a country music emergency.” (40:52)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:30 — Thomas Rhett on being known and loved by family
• 02:52 — The “ultimate surprise” of not learning baby’s gender until birth
• 04:31–05:41 — Socratic method of parenting and lessons from Jefferson’s upbringing
• 08:20–09:47 — Thomas’ musical childhood and early bands
• 13:43–14:22 — Carving an “off-kilter” lane in country music
• 18:09 — Songwriting room: No dumb ideas, just progress
• 19:36–20:58 — Parenting different children; blessing & curse of being the eldest
• 26:39–27:39 — Planning, attention to detail, and marriage personality dynamics
• 29:57–31:48 — Public image of “couple goals” and the reality at home
• 34:21–35:10 — Living up to expert or “couple goals” status in real life
• 36:01 — “I want to be known and loved the most…”; giving best energy to family
• 40:52 — “No such thing as a country music emergency”
• 47:29 — John Maxwell’s mentor: “You are not amazing. Your gifts are amazing…”

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Flow and Tone

The episode is down-to-earth, authentic, and often humorous, echoing the same warmth and vulnerability both Jefferson and Thomas bring to their public personas. The conversation is packed with practical wisdom about communication, the realities of marriage and parenting under public scrutiny, and the ongoing work of aligning your values, faith, and daily presence.

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Takeaways & Lessons

• Be present where your feet are: Give your best energy and attention to your family, not just your public/work life.
• Unlearning “yes”: Protect your time and family by considering which opportunities truly matter.
• Communication as an ongoing practice: Regular, honest conversations—with your spouse and kids—prevent misaligned expectations and resentment.
• Your platform is not your identity: Job titles, success, and social media don’t define you; your relationships and character do.
• Faith and humility anchor everything: A healthy sense of self comes from recognizing your gifts, their source, and your real-life roles.

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For anyone seeking inspiration on family, communication, integrating faith with work, or “giving your best to the people who matter most,” this episode is a heartfelt must-listen.

Transcript

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[Thomas Rhett]

I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most. You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

That's so good.

[Thomas Rhett]

And it's like you're your best self in front of complete strangers, but you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admire and respect

[Jefferson]

you the most or my family getting the best version of me.

[Thomas Rhett]

And that's like buddy, that is the whole. The world loves to talk about work, life, balance.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't believe in it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't. What do you believe? I believe that you have to sort of be 100% committed where your feet are.

[Jefferson]

Now. I have to say congratulations.

[Thomas Rhett]

Thank you.

[Jefferson]

For what? Your son.

[Thomas Rhett]

My son.

[Jefferson]

That's right. The biggest thing that going on right now, like the number one thing that could be going on right now. Yeah, just like how is it being. Have I have a son?

[Thomas Rhett]

No, dude, it's incredible. I mean, you know, when I feel like when babies are under six months, it's hard to fully tell personality or anything. But he's like, he's eight weeks and he's like one of those babies. He was huge. He was £10 when he came out and now he's like £13. And so he's like, he's already doing things that a five month old should be doing at eight weeks, which is wild. He's smiling, he's like eye contacting. Like I feel like his little personality is coming out and I don't remember my other kids having that much personality at eight weeks old. Yeah, he's already in like six to nine month clothing. That's unbelievable. I think he's gonna be a linebacker for sure. He did not get that from me. I don't really know what gene that came from.

[Jefferson]

Came from somebody.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, I was a nice like slot receiver, you know What I mean? £145. He's probably going to be huge. But yeah, it's been amazing, bro. I'll be honest with you, for the first 10 years as being a parent, I just sort of accepted the Fact that we weren't going to have a boy. And I was good with it. Like, I always wanted a boy, but the more girls we started having, I was like, I can. I can do this. This girl. You're four. Four daughters. That's right. Yep. And, man, I just. I don't know, I just never thought it was in the cards. And this. You know, obviously last year, the Lord kind of opened up some wild doors for us and we got pregnant. And I think Lauren has it. My wife Lauren has it in her phone of like 20 different people that called her before we got pregnant and during our pregnancy that said, hey, even people she hadn't talked to in a long time, there's like, hey, I just had this crazy dream. You're pregnant with a boy.

[Jefferson]

That's awesome.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, 20 recorded dreams. Like, our kids had some, our friends had some. And so we all, like, we didn't find out until the day of the birth, which we've never done that on any of the other kids. And for all of you listening, I highly recommend it.

[Jefferson]

Really?

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Because there's no surprises in this world.

[Jefferson]

That's like the most ultimate surprise.

[Thomas Rhett]

Is the ultimate surprise. And so watching little boy come out was. Was one of the coolest moments of my life.

[Jefferson]

That's awesome, man.

[Thomas Rhett]

But it's awesome.

[Jefferson]

Super, super happy for you all. Thanks for tasting. So my. My son is eight.

[Thomas Rhett]

Okay, cool.

[Jefferson]

And I know is now your son how many months now?

[Thomas Rhett]

Two months.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. Okay. So I like, he's. You're. He's already at the perfect age, so like, talking to. To him about, like, the weather.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Stuff of like, this. First thing you got to know is

[Thomas Rhett]

that you gotta have the.

[Jefferson]

The radar, like, immediately. Like, my deck can just whip out the radar at any moment.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Just like this is a cell that's coming. Coming in. It's only gonna last a few minutes. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

You have to know weather, you have to know a few things about life,

[Thomas Rhett]

sports, how to change a wall.

[Jefferson]

That's true.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

And my. My dad didn't. My dad was like, this is how they handle stuff in the courtroom. But that was exactly. Yeah, that was. That was his way of an oil change.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. So what was it? Can I ask you. Am I allowed to ask you a question?

[Jefferson]

You can.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't do podcasts a lot.

[Jefferson]

I don't know if you know this, but we're just chilling. Okay, cool. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

So, like, when you grow up with a dad that's a lawyer.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Did you ever win any argument, like, growing up, like, if he ever like laid a law down or like a rule, were you. Did you ever try to like combat that rule? And did he come at you like law your dad or just dad?

[Jefferson]

Just dad.

[Thomas Rhett]

Okay, that's great. So he was able to disconnect the two.

[Jefferson]

No, they're one, they're like, they're like. So I'm a fifth generation attorney, so just everybody throughout my family, through DAs, federal judges, you name it. And so you didn't win an argument, you just got taught a lesson.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's a plea deal.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. You got a plea deal. That's a good way of putting it. And so he would teach me. Not in terms of this is what you do. He used what they call the Socratic method, which in law school is you ask questions to teach the lesson. Whoa. And so like Jesus. Exactly. So it was almost very parable esque where he would. Instead of me getting upset and what you would hope a dad would do or mom would, you know, get mad with you or get mad at you, he didn't really show anger. He showed disappointment, which almost makes you

[Thomas Rhett]

even more mad, which was terrifying.

[Jefferson]

You know, it was just like, oh, my God, pitting my stomach. But he used a lot of. And so he would always. His thing was he would teach me the other side of the argument. So if I was mad at my mom about something and I would want to come to him, I'm not going to find any comfort there. He's going to say, well, what do you think she's thinking in that moment as your mom? What do you think she's. What do you think she's afraid of right now? Like, he would always flip it to the question and it didn't feel good as a kid because I'm like, come on. Like, you don't.

[Thomas Rhett]

But now as a grown man, what a toolbox.

[Jefferson]

Oh, my gosh. Now it's. I'm trying that with my son.

[Thomas Rhett]

And how's that going?

[Jefferson]

He's equally as frustrated about it. He didn't, he didn't really enjoy it. Now, like with yours, you know, your dad, songwriter, singer, songwriter, and did you feel like that was just part of your natural calling? You saw it, you grew up with it. Like, I feel like your life is just a toy box of 90s country. Like, that's just like, that's what you grew up in.

[Thomas Rhett]

Definitely. I mean, my dad, I was born in Valdosta, Georgia, really small town, south Georgia. We had more than a chili, so I will say that we had a little bit more Than Chili's.

[Jefferson]

So a metropolis, basically. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And then when I was one, we moved to San Antonio. Okay. And that was when my dad. My mom and dad went to uga. University of Georgia. My dad played football there for a year, and then they had me at 19, and we moved to Texas. My dad. Did you remember Fiesta Texas? Do I remember Fiesta Texas? Yeah. I didn't live there long enough to know if, like, everybody was like, we know.

[Jefferson]

Okay.

[Thomas Rhett]

So we stayed.

[Jefferson]

My dad had attorneys, have to have continuing legal education credit every year. And so which means it could be at a hotel or something. Well, we didn't have enough money to go on vacation. So what we did was if you went on the CLE and brought your family, then it got paid for by whatever the firm.

[Thomas Rhett]

Gotcha.

[Jefferson]

And so we would stay at the Hill Country Hyatt, which was right next to Fiesta Texas. And that was my vacation, only vacation for a good solid 11 years. That was it.

[Thomas Rhett]

And it was fantastic. I bet. I bet I was too young to remember it, but I've seen pictures in. My dad basically got hired by some talent agency to basically go and do, like, George Strait covers.

[Jefferson]

Nice.

[Thomas Rhett]

At Fiesta Texas. And so he did that, and I guess, like, someone was there that sort of thought he had talent and so moved to Nashville when I was four. He signed a record deal with this company called deca. And they're not. They're not around anymore. But so we moved to Nashville at 4. And so I grew up in a little town called Hendersonville, Tennessee, which was, like. It used to be 20 minutes north of here. Now it's like an hour north of here.

[Jefferson]

Traffic.

[Thomas Rhett]

Traffic. And so I grew up, you know, with a dad that in. During his, like, artist career, you know, he. He would tour 200, 250 days a year. I mean, just always gone. And so I would always ask my dad, like, can I go on the road? Can I go on the road? Can I go on the road? And I'd been singing since I was, like, four. I mean, I could. I was like a walking jukebox. I knew every song on. On. On country radio. And my first instrument, actually was the drums. I loved to play the drums. And so I loved getting on the bus with my dad to go play whatever, you know, fair festival he was going to play. And I would. I was. I would get up and play Sweet Home Alabama or Last Dance, Mary Jane's Last Dance on the drums.

[Jefferson]

Okay.

[Thomas Rhett]

Okay. And I just remember being like, this is awesome. You know, And. And so that kind of morphed into like, I had a couple little bands, know, in fifth grade, sixth grade, we were like a punk rock band, one of these. And my dad's brother was always a production engineer, slash like front of house guy. And so he recorded my very first album.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

In my dad's living room. We recorded five songs, played one show. Nice that 10 people attended. And I knew that I always sort of had that bug. I loved to just entertain people like my sister and I would always, you know, make up like little skits and my dad would film and we'd write scripts out and stuff and so you and your sister, huh? You have.

[Jefferson]

How many siblings do you have?

[Thomas Rhett]

So I've got a wide range. So my, my sister is four years younger than me.

[Jefferson]

Okay.

[Thomas Rhett]

My parents divorced when I was nine, Both got remarried. So my mom and my stepdad have a brother of mine. He's 21 years old, just turned 21. And my dad and my stepmother have a six year old son, so. So I have.

[Jefferson]

That's quite a range.

[Thomas Rhett]

All over the range.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

But anyway, you know, going through high school and stuff, I always played the talent shows. I was always like the lead and the, the Christmas play or whatever I did at school. And so I always loved to be on stage and I just love to make people smile and make people laugh and, and dance and so. But when I got to college, I never really thought I could make a career of it. And so I went to Lipscomb University here in Nashville. Yeah. Was headed towards a communications degree.

[Jefferson]

Hey.

[Thomas Rhett]

But for me, it was the fastest route out. It was the easiest major in market.

[Jefferson]

Just in business school for the same reason. Like, just get me out of here.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, get me out. And then my sophomore year, my dad had completely kind of quit his artistry career and just pursued full time songwriting. And so him and a group of guys were having a lot of success in like the early 2000s. Sort of like when bro country sort of entered the world. Like Bryan's and the Jason Aldeans.

[Jefferson]

And my speakers go boom boom.

[Thomas Rhett]

Speakers go boom boom. Yeah. And so like they, they were called the Peach Pickers. That was their little writing group. Oh, nice. Not little, their big writing group.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

And literally, dude, I mean, you couldn't turn on the radio for more than 20 minutes without hearing two or three songs that they had written for artists. It was nuts. I was like in some cover bands in college. And then one day I just asked my dad, I was like, can I come sit in on these writing sessions? I just want to. I just don't understand it, really. Like, I just want to watch how y' all do this. And it really is just like this.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Hanging out. Somebody starts playing a little chord on the guitar, and you're like, hey, I had this idea that I wrote down on my phone yesterday, and I'm like, whoa. So this is how it works. And offered up some of my, know, terrible lyrics into the room. And fast forward a couple months. I played a gig downtown with my dad, and there was a guy there that offered me a developmental publishing deal.

[Jefferson]

Nice.

[Thomas Rhett]

Because he thought I had some talent. And from then on, dude, I started writing with a bunch of other people who were just getting going. And got my first cut ever with Jason Aldean. It was like 2011.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

On his My Kind of Party album, if you remember that record.

[Jefferson]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And. And then I started to get a bunch of cuts as a songwriter. And then one thing led to another. I started playing for record labels, got offered a few deals, and signed my first record deal, 21. And here I am, 16. 16 years old. Like, the.

[Sponsor Voice]

The first ones.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's my first number one song.

[Jefferson]

Okay. That's what. And you've had 20 number ones?

[Thomas Rhett]

25.

[Jefferson]

25.

[Thomas Rhett]

Nuts. It doesn't feel real.

[Jefferson]

Did you ever think that was going to happen?

[Thomas Rhett]

No, absolutely not. If you ask my wife, my wife was banking on it not working.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

She was like, this is cute. Yeah. Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Go.

[Thomas Rhett]

Go try your little record deal thing, dude. Okay.

[Jefferson]

I love that because the first video I ever made and you'll know I make videos in my car.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

My wife said, go be my little influencer. That was like her first thing. And so, like. Like, never let that support.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, yeah. You really.

[Jefferson]

She really.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

It's like, so there you go. She goes, go, go, go do your little artistry stuff.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. So we did. We did the premarital counseling, counseling deal. And we got married at 22 years old. And our marriage counselor, my wife graduated from University of Tennessee with a nursing degree.

[Jefferson]

We all high school sweethearts, sort of.

[Thomas Rhett]

We've known each other since first grade, and we. We dated in high school a little bit, and then we broke up and then didn't. Didn't get back together until a little bit later.

[Jefferson]

We were high school sweethearts. Cool. But it sounds like you, like, wander back and you're like, it's always been you. It was always.

[Thomas Rhett]

It was always her. It really was. But, yeah. So we got married at 22, and our marriage counselor advised Lauren to not pursue her. Her nursing thing for just One year she was like, I think y' all just really need to be together because the first year of your touring is an absolute nightmare.

[Jefferson]

You're imagine.

[Thomas Rhett]

I mean, I think we played 280 shows that year or something. So my wife rode the bus with me and my seven other band dudes for an entire year. And after that year was over, she was like, I have put my time in. I'm done.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

With the road. But, yeah. So I put two singles out before it goes like this. That did okay. But it goes like this was my first number one. And then, man, wildly, like, I'm, like, thinking about it now. I think we only had one miss, right? There's only one single I put out radio. Is that right?

[Jefferson]

During the.

[Thomas Rhett]

In my whole career.

[Jefferson]

Correct.

[Thomas Rhett]

Well, besides the first two, yeah. There was one that I put out in the middle of my career that didn't go number one, but it, like, it streamed and sold like it was a number one.

[Jefferson]

That's unreal.

[Thomas Rhett]

I remember calling radio stations, being like,

[Jefferson]

hey, can you play this?

[Thomas Rhett]

Why aren't you playing this? Oh, what's the deal?

[Jefferson]

What's wrong with it?

[Thomas Rhett]

They were just like, it's just a little like, not doesn't fit the box. And I was like, all right, that's fair. You know, Agree to disagree. Agree to disagree. But that was a lot of the songs in my career, man. I. On my second record, dude, I put this song out called Crash and Burn that was just super. Just not what country radio was playing at all. And when that song went number one and a song called Make Me wanna, it sort of carved this, like, weird, unique lane for me where the songs were sort of so off kilter. But I think people recognized my voice. And so I've kind of made a living off of kind of always playing a little bit outside the lane of what, quote, unquote, you know, country radio is definitely.

[Jefferson]

You've definitely found your own.

[Thomas Rhett]

Found the lane, yeah.

[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

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[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

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[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

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[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

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[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

I'm going to ask you a question that. This is a selfish question.

[Thomas Rhett]

Okay.

[Jefferson]

So in a different life, I would have been a songwriter.

[Thomas Rhett]

I love.

[Jefferson]

That's true. We're not done.

[Thomas Rhett]

And I can be a lawyer.

[Jefferson]

There we go. Oh, let's go. We'll just switch. Switch trades. So I grew up James Taylor, Jim Croce. Like, that was singer, songwriter era. How does. When you're in that room for the first time and with your dad and guys, is it like super nerve wracking when you're around people who know how to write songs and you're like, actually, I think it might be cool to add in this. This. And they're like, totally. Like, how. How did they. How did they politely kind of say no, but no, or like, how does that.

[Sponsor Voice]

Walk me through that process?

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, but it still happens. Like, I was. I mean, I don't. I hate the. The term professional. I hold fully, loosely as a singer or an artist. Yeah, but walk me through that. What happens? Yeah, I mean, the thing that we do now is if we. If we hear a line from someone who even is a great songwriter and. And they say something, we're like, oh, that's cool.

[Jefferson]

That's it.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean?

[Jefferson]

That's your.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's like the polite way of saying that's not the line. Yeah. Oh, that's cool.

[Jefferson]

That's cool.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's cool. Yeah. Anyway, you know, but when you're an unexperienced rider, like, I was in that room, even just having the courage to speak is horrifying. I mean, it's like. It's like stepping on the first tee box at Augusta.

[Jefferson]

It has to be like, I think of, like whenever I see any bluegrass circles, you know, man, if I was, I might have to jump in on a. I would just be terrified if, like, you. You're going in there, like, just.

[Thomas Rhett]

I will say that's more nerve wracking if you're just kind of an okay guitar player.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Hopping in with a bunch of professional bluegrass players. I just wouldn't play, but in a writing room. So this. You have a little more. It's. It's different.

[Jefferson]

It's a little bit. Okay. It's more.

[Thomas Rhett]

There's more grass there.

[Jefferson]

Okay.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Because you just physically can't be as good as those bluegrass guys.

[Jefferson]

I feel like in. In communication, we say, yeah, that's crazy. Like, the things that aren't crazy, but we don't want to say.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's most of my conversations with a stranger.

[Jefferson]

You know what I mean? You don't want to say, like, that was kind of useless information. I don't know what to do with that. Whoa. Yeah, that's crazy.

[Thomas Rhett]

That means I could care less.

[Jefferson]

That's exactly. That's. That's. It's saying, thank you for the nothing you just gave me is what it really is. But it's, like, similar.

[Thomas Rhett]

It's very similar.

[Jefferson]

Thank you for that help, that heaping help of nothing.

[Thomas Rhett]

But I do think with songwriting, everyone has their own unique style. I mean, just like in law, I would imagine not every lawyer goes about the courtroom the exact same way. Like, no. Like, in the same with parenting. Like, your dad definitely parented different than I'm parenting now, but I cannot wait to adopt the way that your dad parented into my children. But in songwriting, dude, everybody just has their own style and their own brand. And unless you're writing with people that have the grace to allow you to say some stupid stuff, you're never going to. You're never going to get any better, because if you don't say it, it's definitely not going to be put in the song. You might as well just say it. So we start off every session by saying, hello, There are no dumb ideas in this room.

[Jefferson]

I like that.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Because you almost have to leave the ego at the door.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. And you're going to go through a lot of terribleness in every session. I don't care how good you are to get to something that's, like, this great.

[Jefferson]

And I feel that's, you know, it's life.

[Sponsor Voice]

I would say that's life.

[Jefferson]

Yes. Right. Now. How do. How does. I want to pick that up for here? Here you are, the son, which hits different than girls, but you love your girls.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

You love your son. You have all your kids.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

For me, like, I've lived different lives. In each one, I learned just a little bit more. In each one, I get a little bit more proud of who I am and what I'm doing, how I'm showing up.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

You find, like, in this season, this Stage of your life right now is your. Is your favorite.

[Thomas Rhett]

Do I feel like this is my favorite?

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yes. Yeah. I mean, yes. I'm. I'm my most true self today than I have ever been.

[Jefferson]

Do I love that?

[Thomas Rhett]

And I think you're. I think you're going to say that hopefully always. Every decade.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. You don't want to be like, oh, this is all right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Well, it was really way better, dude, at 25. Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I think if. If you can't say that every few years and you really have not. You're not, you're not doing any work.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

On yourself. And I think it's. You have to do. You have to continue to work on yourself. I mean, I told my, my 10 year old daughter the other night, we got in the bed and she was saying something like, why are you. I'm trying to remember how she phrased this. Like, why, why do I get in trouble for things? But like, but like Lennon doesn't. Our six year old. And I'm like, baby, unfortunately. And unfortunately.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You are the oldest.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Right. So with that comes great responsibility. With that comes, you're gonna do things before everybody else gets to do them. On the flip side of that, this is the first time I'm dealing with it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying? I've never had a 10 year old before, so I'm learning this in real time.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

With you. You know what I'm saying? Because you know, the whole like, model of like the. The youngest kid always got like, less.

[Jefferson]

Dude, I'm the oldest of four. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Were envious of your younger brothers and sisters for sure.

[Jefferson]

And they were envious of me. You know, I couldn't wait to get my driver's license and just run to the store and get bread. Correct. You know what I mean? But the youngest got to just totally. He. It was me who Saturday mornings had to go with dad to go pick up sticks right from the yard. They were still watching cartoons.

[Thomas Rhett]

But even think about how you hold your first child compared to how you hold your. For me. My fifth child.

[Jefferson]

Oh, yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, my first child, it was like, holy crap.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, you don't want to.

[Thomas Rhett]

My fifth child, I'm like, hey, I'm mowing the grass.

[Jefferson]

Come here.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying? It's just like every kid becomes less fragile and you start to understand that like, oh, these, these beings, these creatures are so resilient and so much tougher than we ever give them credit for. But, but, but the mental emotional side of it is, like, with every kid, I feel like I just become more like, okay, I've experienced this problem before.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

We've been here. We've been through the lying. We've been through the deception. We've been through all the stuff to where now I'm like, I know exactly how to deal with this with you.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Whereas, like, the oldest kid, you're literally learning it as they're learning it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying? So it's a blessing and a curse of being the oldest child, which I am too.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. And I think that's the same way with marriage, man. We've been. This will be 15 years for us.

[Thomas Rhett]

Cool.

[Jefferson]

And I was. I forgot.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

But it has only been even in these past two years. Or I could say even in the last year or six months or whatever. Always seems to be the better version because. And I. Who was.

[Sponsor Voice]

I forgot.

[Jefferson]

Who was I talking to? Who was like, but y' all been married 15 years. I was like, that doesn't mean you gotta figure it out. Like, you need even more Runway to try and figure things out. Like, it's not like, oh, you already have things figured out. No. And I have to imagine this is, like, in for you as a musician. Like, you're singing about the things you're learning about what you're going through. Right now I get to teach things that I'm still learning totally conflict, how to handle disagreements. I'm getting a daily lesson of that every day. And so it is. Has to be this impression of you. Do you feel like there are times when it's easier to write it in a song than actually say it to her?

[Thomas Rhett]

Sometimes. But I want to speak to something that you just said, because I feel like that is why you are having the success that you're having is because, yes, there are people that want to go to someone that has figured it all out.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

But I think people relate so much more to someone that, like, has wisdom but is also actively going through the thing that they're talking about.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean? Like, being able to say, I'm still battling with this, but yet here's some ways I'm working on it is now palatable for the person that has not even begun to work on it.

[Jefferson]

I totally agree with that.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean?

[Jefferson]

Yeah, absolutely. It's like, a lot of the times I feel like the world can just focus on the battle you've been for sure. The battle you've been in. And there are times where you presented with the opportunity. Opportunity to say. Yeah, but let me tell you about my victory.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's right.

[Jefferson]

Let me tell you how I came out of it.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's right.

[Jefferson]

Let me tell you how I can share of. You think that's bad. I got way worse.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

And let me tell you how I got out of it.

[Thomas Rhett]

Well, just the power of testimony of any kind.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Yeah. To know that somebody else has already.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's right.

[Jefferson]

Been in that with you.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Which is why I think everyone needs an old friend. The oldest of everyone needs an old man. A dude needs an old man. And a woman needs an old woman in their lives that they talk to once a month on the phone.

[Jefferson]

Hands down, I have several good. Yeah, I've always been like an old soul, for sure. But that I definitely have some old people that I call up when things are going on. We call it in my circles of having a bucket. So you'll call a buddy and just go, I need a bucket. And that means just lay it all out.

[Thomas Rhett]

Dump it all.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, dump it all out there. And then you start to sift it and sort it. But you got to hear from people who've been through it. Otherwise, you don't. You lose it. I always feel of. Makes me think of growing up. We would have our golf tournaments in high school. The reason I liked going to golf tournaments in high school was because. And I wasn't any good at golf back then. But you got out of school. But we go to McDonald's early in the morning, and they just came out with, I think, the McGriddle. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

What a great day.

[Jefferson]

That is so good. It's so good. But there'd always be this, like, round table of old men just meeting to talk about whatever. And I just want. That's what I want.

[Thomas Rhett]

And more than likely, they have been talking in that. In that same setting for 40 years at least. And crazy, like, how the problems or the successes continue to change over that course of time. You know what I mean? Like, we. My wife and I have been a part of a Bible study now for eight years, which I'm learning is a very long time to be in a Bible study.

[Jefferson]

I would say. Yeah. With all, like, the small group kind of.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Because, like, I mean, between our seven couples in our group, we have, like, 30 children.

[Jefferson]

Oh, that's a lot, dude. Yeah. So like, just, like, homeschool them while you're in Bible study.

[Thomas Rhett]

No, I mean, like, literally, like, the amount of, like, effort we have all put it Put in to be like, hey, Mondays are non negotiable.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

It's pretty fascinating to like look back at eight years. But like we, you know, we. I don't know if you journal or anything. I'm a terrible journaler. But like even just like I say, yeah.

[Jefferson]

I mean I'm pretty bad at it.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like looking back at like what the prayer requests were.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Compared to what? First of all, what prayers were answered and now like what are our prayer requests now are so different than they were seven years ago.

[Jefferson]

Perspective.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Growing with a group of people that are doing life similarly is such a blessing to me. So.

[Jefferson]

And I find that even one. Absolutely too. I do that a lot with Sierra and I. The things that I can look back, we prayed for a year for a year ago. Or the conversations we've even had six months ago.

[Thomas Rhett]

Totally.

[Jefferson]

And the way that that's been tracked and either things that we thought were a big deal got handled and the things that we thought were the biggest thing that was going on weren't. We missed it. You know what I mean?

[Thomas Rhett]

Isn't that so funny? But why do we continue to think that the things moving forward are still such a big deal? You know what I'm saying? Think about all the battles you went through and now you can look back at them and laugh, but you're still sort of doing the same things. But for some reason you can't laugh about them in the moment. They still become this world crumbling thing that when you make it through, you're like, oh, this is just like all the other world crumbling things that happened in the last decade.

[Jefferson]

Right. Are you like I always, I don't know the dynamic between you and Lauren of like, I'm the, it's going to be fine. She's the we're going to have to plan out every single scenario. And she's thought about it a million times more than I ever have.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Do you find like how do your personalities balance each other?

[Thomas Rhett]

Your wife.

[Jefferson]

Oh, yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And my wife is you.

[Jefferson]

She's just like, it's going to be fun. We're going to just going to be good.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. Which I feel like that's. I feel like that's kind of the biggest work I've been trying to do on myself is like, because I do know that my, you know, over attention to things like my wife would say I have a lack of attention to detail, but I have a lack of attention to detail of things that I don't care about. But if I care about them, I have like an ocd, attention to the detail. Like, I'm like, what are we, you know, if we're going on, like, a vacation, Lauren's like, we'll just figure it out when we get there. I'm like, no, we're going to Italy. Like, you have to plan Italy. You can't just. You can't just show up in Rome.

[Jefferson]

All right, we're definitely swamped.

[Thomas Rhett]

And be like, we're just gonna. I don't know. We'll try this gelato out. Can we get on the phone with the travel agent?

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

He's like, maybe in next week. I'm like, no, like today.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, right at this moment.

[Thomas Rhett]

So I would say I'm a lot like your wife.

[Jefferson]

I definitely. I'm a lot like your wife. That definitely vibes. I think this. This is good for our relationship. I can already see what's going to work out, man.

[Sponsor Voice]

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[Jefferson]

I want to talk for a moment on the idea of. You've had a lot of songs about women, marriage, specifically a woman, your wife, and you almost in some way become a model for marriage in culture, in news or whatever celebrity is. How hard is that? What's that like when you feel like, hold up, wait, we're just as normal as everybody else, and all of a sudden we're. People actually care more about our marriage and actually being in it.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, it's a. It's a weird juxtaposition. You know, I was actually having this conversation earlier, but, like, when, you know, being in the limelight, quote unquote, or being like a quote unquote, like celebrity.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You, you know, the world sort of develops this. This framework that you. That they pin you under. You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

They decide for you.

[Thomas Rhett]

They kind of decide for you of just kind of like if you were. And maybe I'm wrong on this, but I would like to think that if you went out. If you went out in Nashville right Now and polled 100 people, like, hey, when. When I say the name Thomas Rhett, what do you think of. They'd be like, oh, his wife.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Okay, what else? His kids.

[Jefferson]

His beautiful kids. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

They're like, okay, what else? Music?

[Jefferson]

No.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Maybe. Doesn't he sing?

[Thomas Rhett]

Doesn't he sing? Exactly. And so. And maybe I'm wrong on that, but I would. I would like to believe that that is more than likely what people will think of when they think of me. And so it's like, it has been this interesting kind of change, especially, like, you know, social media has been around for a minute now, but now it literally is all like, podcasts. Social media is our way that we. That we project. This is the way we, you know, market all the stuff. And so for me, it's been interesting to find this balance of, like, okay, well, when I post a picture of, like, my family on Easter Sunday, it's going to get a shitload of engagement.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

But if I post a picture, a video of a new song, maybe it's not going to connect as much. And so for me, I have to find this, like, weird balance of, like. But I still do this for a living.

[Commercial Narrator]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah. Because I think people have sort of labeled Our family, like, I mean, couple goals.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know, dream family goals, all this kind of stuff. And so when that is your perception, you sort of innately come back into your house and when things are not going well, you're like, you kind of in your mind go, but I thought we were the perfect family, right? I thought I was the perfect husband.

[Jefferson]

Exactly.

[Thomas Rhett]

Everybody thinks I am.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Sponsor Voice]

Everybody says I am.

[Thomas Rhett]

Everybody says I am.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And so it is fascinating, dude, because there we live such a normal life, like, as normal as we can to have done the things that we have gotten to do.

[Jefferson]

Yes.

[Thomas Rhett]

I would like to think that we are very normal. I understand that some of our ways of traveling are different and some of the places we stay are different, but, like, I feel like we are so insanely normal. And my kids think that we are so insanely normal that when we go places and people want to take pictures with me and Lauren, our kids are just like, what the frick is happening?

[Jefferson]

Right?

[Thomas Rhett]

My six year old was like, why do these people like you?

[Jefferson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I'm like, well, you know, do you know that I sing?

[Jefferson]

Right?

[Thomas Rhett]

She's like, exactly. I mean, yeah, yeah. But like. And you know what I mean? And so, like, I'm trying in this season to, like, kind of really teach my kids, really, what do I do for a living? Because it's fascinating if you were to ask your kid, hey, what does daddy do for a living?

[Jefferson]

Right. Exactly.

[Thomas Rhett]

I'd be curious to hear their response.

[Jefferson]

We always say, daddy just helps people. That's it.

[Thomas Rhett]

Right?

[Jefferson]

Because when they stop. And my daughter's very vocal and she'd be like, do you know her?

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, exactly.

[Jefferson]

You know what I mean? And I'm like, well, kind of. Yeah, we know each other. And Daddy helps, you know, like. But that's kind of.

[Thomas Rhett]

But they also think, like, my kids think that because I'm a singer that I just have everyone's phone number. Oh, and that. And that whoever can come over for lunch tomorrow, Right?

[Jefferson]

Oh, there we go.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean?

[Jefferson]

Yeah, I get that last.

[Thomas Rhett]

I think it was last week, or maybe it was Easter Sunday. One of my kids was like, do you think the Jonas Brothers are going to come tomorrow for Easter? And I'm like, no, no, probably not. They're not marshmallows. They're like, but you sing.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And I'm like, yeah. And so I'm trying to, like. I'm trying to, like, really take them through the weeds of, like, what I actually do for a living.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, singing is this Much of it.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Writing is this much of it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Planning meetings are this much of it.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

All the tour design, like all the stuff. And so now that they, they're starting to understand that, oh, my job is more than just singing. Now all of a sudden my kids are like, my 10 year old the other night was like, well, I want to be a designer and I'm going to design dresses. I want to be the CEO of my company. I was like, where'd you learn the word CEO? She was like, I'm going to live in Paris for a year.

[Jefferson]

Oh, there we go.

[Thomas Rhett]

Then I moved to London and then I have eight kids.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. I was like, oh, that's awesome.

[Thomas Rhett]

Perfect.

[Jefferson]

And how old is she?

[Thomas Rhett]

She's 10.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I love that. My six year old last night was like, I think I'm going to move to California for a little bit. And then maybe if you're still in Tennessee, maybe I might come say hi. Yeah. And then. And I was like, okay, yeah. She's already thought this, like, way out, way farther than I need to. I was like, you mean you're not going to stay with me?

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Like, she's like, no, why would I. Why would I do that?

[Thomas Rhett]

But no, back to your qu. I think it's just like perception versus reality is a tough, tough battle.

[Jefferson]

And I. I'll share like mine. I will. Here I have a platform where I talk about how to have good communication and how to handle conflict and arguments and model recovery. And how do you. How do you repair after an argument? And then it's really easy to get into a disagreement because you're married to another human. And it's like, well, okay, Mr. Communications Expert, you know what I'm saying? And then it's like, it has to be hard too. Of here y' all are put in this hashtag, couple goals. And then because you're married and human, you get into an argument, all of a sudden it's wait, we're hashtag, couple goals.

[Thomas Rhett]

What are we doing?

[Jefferson]

And then it's easy to. Because you got kids and it's bath time and it's whatever else.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. And I think to that there's a quote that says, what does it say? Cursed is the man who is a prophet overseas, but a burden in his own home.

[Jefferson]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't know who wrote that, but it's pretty brilliant to me. And it's like, what kind of capacity and what space are you giving to use your talents in your workplace? But not for sure in Your house.

[Jefferson]

Was it Paul?

[Thomas Rhett]

I think it was.

[Jefferson]

It might have been like maybe Paul. I think it was a. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a guy. What a pal. What a pal.

[Thomas Rhett]

But yeah, dude, I mean, it's, it's, it's like it's so easy for like me to sit here with you and just be like the nicest dude in the world.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

But if I can't take that mentality and bring it back into my house because it's like the, the old saying of I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

That's so good.

[Thomas Rhett]

And it's like you're your best self in front of complete stranger.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

But you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admire and respect you the most.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. There's a question I always try to ask myself is, is are my fans or my family getting the best version of me?

[Thomas Rhett]

And that's like, buddy, that is the whole. The world loves to talk about work, life, balance.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't believe in it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't.

[Jefferson]

What do you believe?

[Thomas Rhett]

I believe that you have to sort of be 100 committed where your feet are.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

So if you're at home, you have to be 100. That guy.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean? Like, I think that it's, it's a, it's a slippery slope to me to be like, oh, I can take a couple phone calls.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

On a Saturday. Yeah.

[Jefferson]

That's hard.

[Thomas Rhett]

While my kids are playing T ball in the backyard. Because those couple calls turn into an all day thing.

[Sponsor Voice]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And then all of a sudden, I find myself in my studio writing a song that. Of an idea that came to my brain. And then before I know it.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

The weekend is over and I spent no time with my children.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Just a little bit. It.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Sponsor Voice]

I find.

[Jefferson]

I think you would be somebody who would support this. The last year in particular for me, I went by this idea of what's best for the business is what's best for the family. And what I have gone through, man, it is bright line red clear to me of. Is the opposite. What's best for the family is what's best for the business of like what you're doing right now, what's best for your, your children and Lauren is what carries through everything else and how different that is.

[Thomas Rhett]

100. Because think about it like this. Like, if you're. If your job, I'm trying to word this. Right. If things are right in the home. Right. And like, you're spending not quantity time, you're spending quality time with your family, it could be super limited too.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, even if you only get a couple hours a weekend. But. But it's like in very, very, very intentional.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

That's so much more than you just like kind of being there for a week.

[Jefferson]

Just happen it.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I'm saying? And so, like, if your wife feels loved and known, if your kids feel loved and known and seen, all of a sudden when you walk out the door to go to work, your family's going, go get them dad.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Compared to it's that thing.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like he's going to do the thing that continues to take away from us.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Does that make sense?

[Jefferson]

No, I'm right there with you, man. I'm talking because I've. I've lived that too.

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[Jefferson]

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[Jefferson]

get some salty water.

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[Jefferson]

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[Jefferson]

I've heard you speak on kind of this transition of things you didn't do as well in marriage and relationship. And family.

[Sponsor Voice]

And now you're at a place where

[Jefferson]

you feel like you do well. So what is the thing in your mind you felt like you had to unlearn to be where you are now?

[Thomas Rhett]

I was on the phone. I hope she's okay with me sharing this. And if it's not, y' all can just.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, we can cut whatever. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

But I was on the phone with Miranda Lambert the other day. Yeah, she's kind of weirdly always been. Not weirdly. She's been an amazing friend ever since I started in this business.

[Jefferson]

Oh, that's cool.

[Thomas Rhett]

I was kind of seven or eight years behind her, so she's always been doing it eight to 10 years longer than me.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

So she's always had a 10 year sort of wisdom gap ahead of me or whatever. And I called her the other day, Just. Just talk about music, the road, touring. Like, at what point do you, like, not do a 50 show tour? Like, at what point do you decide, maybe we can't. Maybe we can't sell 20,000 tickets? You know, we were having this conversation and they started talking about, man, I just feel like I end up just saying yes always for the sake of more.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And she said, she said, let me just remind you that there is no such thing as a country music emergency.

[Jefferson]

That's good.

[Thomas Rhett]

And I love, I freaking love that quote. Because it's not just a country music emergency.

[Sponsor Voice]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

She was like, you're not a doctor. Like, you're not going in to do a heart transplant tonight. You're not curing cancer. You're literally deciding, should I do this podcast or should I not?

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know what I mean? When you really zoom out a thousand feet, you kind of go, oh, that's really not a big deal.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And more than likely there will be another opportunity to do something else down the line that matches up better with my schedule. And so I think, think the thing that I had to unlearn is that if. If I said no eight to 10 years ago, which I didn't say no eight to 10 years ago. Always a yes. I've had to. I've had to unlearn that. Just because it's a good opportunity doesn't mean it's the best opportunity.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And so I've been very, very fortunate with such an amazing team.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

That sort of knows where my rankings are on my, like, family work stuff to where it's like they have done a great job at just presenting me with a lot of different options and being like, hey, we believe that this Is great. We believe that this is a lot of good exposure. We believe this. We believe this. And so they present the options. And then we haven't done this. Great. But we have now started trying to do once a month, sitting down, not just with me, but with my wife, because I'm not a good communicator. I'm one of those people that will say yes to a million things and get super fired up about this thing and super fired up about this. And then I get home and I'm like, oh, I really need to talk to Lauren about this. As you know. Yeah, when?

[Jefferson]

Yes.

[Thomas Rhett]

When are we gonna do that?

[Jefferson]

Yes.

[Thomas Rhett]

When we get in the bed at night.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's happening?

[Thomas Rhett]

Are we gonna do that? Are we trying to watch Silo Season 3? You know what I'm saying? And it just ends up not getting talked about. And then by the time that whole busy week that we planned gets there.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Everyone's in shock. You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

My wife goes, when did you plan all this? They're like, oh, a couple months ago.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

She was like, well, I didn't. I mean, we don't have. We don't have a babysitter. Like, I'm like, oh, shoot.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And then I just scramble, and then I cancel, and then I become this, like, very unreliable person. Does that make sense?

[Sponsor Voice]

Dude, I. I lived that.

[Jefferson]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Like, in the last six months. All right? Because what would happen is they would say, of course my scale much smaller on tour and everything else. Of they'd asked me, can you be on this show, podcast, whatever? And I go, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then. Or I'd say, hold off. And then I'd ask Sierra, and she'd be like, oh, well, that's Ruby's dance recital. You know, like. Or this is not dance recital, but, like, this is a program at school. I'm getting stressed out, and I'm like. I'm like, oh, it is. Okay. And then I'd have to go tell somebody that's not a good date, and then they have to come back with a different date. And it was like, they just put me in a impossible position. And so what we've done is now Sierra is, like, the number one filter of protecting her job is chief. Number one of, like, any schedule things, any publicity things, any of your stuff like that once a month meeting or whatever, it all runs through her. And so it's. Don't let me make a scheduling decision. Because her brain has the capacity to handle all the Tabs for sure out and open. And that just makes my life and our life like that much better or able to do that.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, 100%, man.

[Jefferson]

I do have to tell you, this number one song that gets played on my house is you're nothing else with Forest Frank.

[Thomas Rhett]

Oh, sick dude.

[Jefferson]

My kids love we all every morning. Every morning is Forest Frank every morning. And so I have to say there's

[Thomas Rhett]

not much like inspiring music out there that feels like you're listening to Fetty Wap at the same time. You know what I'm saying? You can just blast on a Monday night.

[Jefferson]

It's just age appropriate for everybody. Yeah, exactly. And so I'll be making eggs, just going, man, I'm having. This is. Yeah. I do have to say I am encouraged and proud to see what I have seen. And that is more leaning into your faith and being more, I think, just more God focused in your message. And I think that's something as somebody watching from the outside, man, I'm so proud, dude. I think that's just, that's just awesome because that's hard. That's really hard of like, what. What do you. What if you're not the Thomas Rhett that people fell in love with 13 years ago or whatever and like you're in these different life stages and phases and you're in different phase of marriage and everything. And some. A lot of that too is faith for sure.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah, man, it's, you know, it's. It's always been a part of me. I mean, ever since I was young. Like, I. I mean, I think I got baptized when I was 8. I'm not totally sure I knew what it meant.

[Jefferson]

Yeah, I think when I was married, like right at that age.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah. And then. But I, I don't, I mean I've always believed. But I, I don't think that my like faith got really real until I was like a sophomore in college. And then, you know, when I got on the road, it was always a part of me, but it never was as, like, never was as vocal.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

You know, and for some reason I don't know what it is about the human brain turning 30. Like, do you know the science behind. Is it like, is my brain fully developed now?

[Jefferson]

Yeah, I don't.

[Thomas Rhett]

36 year old, man.

[Jefferson]

I don't think so. Maybe I think we're just coming online.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Sponsor Voice]

Honestly, I don't.

[Thomas Rhett]

I don't know if it was. It was either turning 30 or me turning 30 during COVID you know, Covid warped me.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like in the Worst way and in the best way humanly possible. I think that, like, that year, as hard as it was, God did so many things in my life that year that I did not know they were happening while they were happening.

[Jefferson]

Right.

[Thomas Rhett]

Even just like that year, I feel like so much of my identity and what I did was completely stripped away from me. You know what I'm saying?

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

I was talking to Harry about this the other day, but the things that we did for money that year were so hilarious. Like the sponsorship deals we did. I played on Zoom calls for corporate companies, like, 10,000 people, and you can't see any of them in your basement alone jamming. And they would, like, unmute it, and you would hear, like that, you know, and you're like, what the frick are we doing? What's happening? But, you know, when you were in the middle of COVID you really. You really did. I really did not believe that we were ever going to ever be able to go do anything ever again.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, I was so warped and. But God, like, every month would just keep stripping me and keep stripping me and keep stripping me and just remind me, like, hey, first and foremost, you're a husband. Hey, first and foremost, you're a father. Hey, first. First and foremost, you're a son. You're a friend. And then comes this thing. Singer, right? I was at a conference last week. Ever heard John Maxwell speak?

[Jefferson]

I have, Buddy.

[Thomas Rhett]

Like, I don't know if you're a fan or not, but, like, the way. The way that he kind of presented this to me was pretty wild. Or maybe not to me, but it was just like, as part of a conference. And he was just like. I guess when he was kind of getting going early on in his career, he had a mentor that flew out to meet him. And he was like, hey, John, you know, it sounds like things are going pretty well. You know, you're. A lot of people are coming to church and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, I'm doing pretty good. And he was like, yeah. And it sounds like when you deliver sermons, people. People like it a lot. And they're like, yeah, we're getting a pretty good reaction, you know? And he was like, I bet you think you're pretty amazing, don't you? It was like, ah, you know, I don't know. He was like, let me remind you, you are not amazing. Yeah, you're not amazing. Your gifts are amazing. But those gifts were given freely to you. And that was a huge message that I feel like I learned during COVID is like, I guess it's me. It's my voice, it's my songs, it's all that stuff. But those are all gifts that were given to me freely. You know what I'm saying? And so I don't remember what we were talking about, but I guess, like, after Covid was when I just sort of. I couldn't really not be vocal about my faith anymore.

[Jefferson]

Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

And I'm not. I'm not a preacher by any means.

[Jefferson]

You don't gotta be me.

[Thomas Rhett]

I. I'm not a preacher.

[Jefferson]

You don't gotta be. You just gotta follow him. But.

[Thomas Rhett]

But the more I. The more I read and the more I walked, just more. More intimately with the Lord, it just sort of. It just started flowing out of me differently than it had before.

[Jefferson]

COVID Well, so I know you have, you know, a lot of music that's inside of you still and things that I think you're gonna.

[Thomas Rhett]

Yeah.

[Jefferson]

Bring out. And it's not going to be you. It's going to be your gifts, the gifts that do it. And I'm going to look forward to watching it, man. Thanks, man. Yeah.

[Thomas Rhett]

Thank you, buddy.

[Jefferson]

I really, really appreciate it. It was just. All the best to you and your family and especially your new son.

[Thomas Rhett]

Thanks, bro.

[Jefferson]

Congratulations.

[Thomas Rhett]

I appreciate it.

[Jefferson]

Thanks.

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