The John Clay Wolfe Show #177 – Summary (12.08.18)

Main Theme:
This episode of The John Clay Wolfe Show, powered by GiveMeTheVIN.com, is a high-energy romp through the usual turf: cars, sports, sex, drugs, and rock & roll, packed with funny banter, wild stories, outrageous opinions, hard-nosed car bids, and constant ribbing among John and his crew. Behind the fun is the business of buying and selling cars, and this week, there are updates on a massive upcoming auction. As always, the team also riffs on current events, pop culture, and listener calls, maintaining a raw, unfiltered tone.

Table of Contents

• Car Culture, Autopilot, and Legal Quirks
• Behind-the-Scenes: Syndication & Radio Execs’ Visit
• Rock & Roll Tangents, Mock Interviews, and Tour Dates
• Inside GiveMeTheVIN: Auctions, Security, and Tweaker-Proofing
• Car Calls & On-Air Negotiations
• Life, Lies, and Lessons: Relationships, Contractors, and Getting Burned
• Sports, Holiday Giving, and Building Repair Woes
• Pop Culture Bits: Songs, Cancel Culture, and PC Christmas
• Notable Skits, Characters & Wild Tangents
• Listener Interactions & Closing Thoughts

Car Culture, Autopilot, and Legal Quirks

• Tesla Autopilot and DWI Debate (00:08 – 01:42)
  • The show opens discussing a California incident where a man was found asleep at the wheel of a Tesla on autopilot and arrested for DWI.
  • JCW and team riff on whether you should be held responsible for DWI if the car's driving itself.
    • Quote: "He wasn’t driving. He was riding... I think you give Elon Musk the DWI, Mr. Fancy Pants." – John Clay Wolfe (01:15)
  • Ultimately, the law is clear: still illegal to be drunk in the driver’s seat.

Behind-the-Scenes: Syndication & Radio Execs’ Visit

• Radio Execs Visiting the Studio (02:45 – 05:45, 61:01 – 63:05)
  • JCW announces reps from Intercom Philly are in for a “sphincter test”—their way of seeing if the show is "safe" for national syndication.
  • The crew jokes about weird corporate evaluation metrics and “being open to new ideas.”
    • Quote: "They’re gonna give us the sphincter test… It’s like how hard did it hit their sphincter?" – John Clay Wolfe (03:36)
  • Corporate brings a Fender guitar as a gift, reinforcing the theme of sell-out anxiety vs. keeping the show authentic.
    • Quote: "They’re going to make us rich and famous—if we’ll sell out." – John Clay Wolfe (61:19)
    • Longtime crew recall high-as-a-kite conversations about never selling out.

Rock & Roll Tangents, Mock Interviews, and Tour Dates

• Keith Richards “Interview” & Old School Rock Jabs (05:45 – 13:14)
  • JD Ryan impersonates Keith Richards discussing Rolling Stones trivia and gripes about old tour dates, misadventures, junkies, and record execs.
    • Quote: "Do you ever know your tour dates or do you even know what city you’re in?" – JCW, in character banter (08:51)
  • Real tour schedule banter touches down—Pasadena, Houston, no Vegas yet—segueing back to the show’s car auction.

Inside GiveMeTheVIN: Auctions, Security, and Tweaker-Proofing

• Christmas Auction & Car Buying Blitz (12:14 – 13:32, 45:17 – 45:46, 86:26 – 87:27)

  • JCW builds excitement for the year’s biggest car auction—aiming for 500–700 cars.
  • Shoutouts to regional offices, need for “big stars” (i.e., exotic cars) to liven the event.

• Remote Check Printing & Tweaker-Proofing (14:32 – 16:01, 20:00 – 22:23)

  • JCW describes security measures for remote check printers and explains “tweaker-proofing” the system against fraud, riffing on Oklahoma meth culture.
    • Quote: "We need to think like an Oklahoma tweaker. What would an Oklahoma tweaker do?" – JCW (15:16)

• Bank Fraud Prevention (19:49–21:59)

  • A banker caller offers advice, but the hosts riff on condoms, foam, and vasectomies as analogies for security.

Car Calls & On-Air Negotiations

• The Heart of the Show: Raw Car Bidding (18:13 onwards, recurring throughout)
  • JCW fields calls from listeners who want to sell their vehicles, from luxury models to beaters, quoting aggressive offers, calling out time-wasters (“strokes”).
    • Quote: “I did this in 15 seconds. I should get it just because I’m that good.” – JCW (19:04)
  • Common theme: JCW is snarky, efficient, and no-nonsense in deals, calling out manipulative callers and underlining the “be ready or don’t call” message.
    • Quote: “Do not call this radio program if you are a stroke or not ready to do business.” – JCW (45:17)
  • Humorous requests for “fat bottom girls” (cool/coveted cars) and the best exotics for the auction.

Life, Lies, and Lessons: Relationships, Contractors, and Getting Burned

• Cheating, Free Passes, and Broken Trust (32:09 – 36:08)

  • Host launches into past infidelity stories; references "Jalapeño Carla," ex-wives, and getting double-crossed both personally and in business.
    • Quote: “We made a pact... not to sell out... we were out varmint hunting, right? We got real baked.” – JD Ryan (61:42)
  • Ongoing riffs on trust, being burned by “car guys,” or sketchy business folk.

• Contractors, Bad Customers, and Cultural Stereotypes (36:24 – 44:47)

  • Contractor callers air grievances on not being paid, leading to a rant about cultural differences in business, particularly stereotypes about Middle Eastern contract practices.
    • Satirical, edgy, and playing with taboos—example of the show’s unfiltered approach.
    • Quote: “They take pride in whacking you. They take pride in chopping you down and beating you out of money.” – JCW (39:04)

• Lessons for Listeners: Only take serious offers, get deposits, and beware of empty promises.

Sports, Holiday Giving, and Building Repair Woes

• OU Playoffs, Tour Listings, and Football (27:40 – 31:16, 63:05 – 64:22)

  • Banter about OU football, playoff hopes, Heisman prospects.
  • The team jokes about aging fans and athletes.

• Tyler Perry’s Holiday Generosity (28:34 – 29:57)

  • Story about Tyler Perry paying off layaway balances at Georgia Walmarts ($434,000+) is shared and praised.
    • Quote: “Merry Christmas to everybody. Go get your layaway!” – Tyler Perry (29:15)

• Home Building Delays & Contractor Blues (31:03 – 32:09)

  • Many tales about construction nightmares and contractor “lies” over cost and schedule.
    • The host invites listeners to share their (mis)adventures.

Pop Culture Bits: Songs, Cancel Culture, and PC Christmas

• “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” Gets ‘Banned’ (74:42 – 76:33)

  • Songs like “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” are discussed as being retroactively declared “rapey” and banned.
    • DJ Pre K debuts parody remix “Baby, There’s Hoes Outside.”
      • Notable Skit: This tongue-in-cheek update is swiftly “banned” on air for its level of political incorrectness.
  • The show revels in poking fun at cancel culture and new boundaries in media.

• Seattle NHL Team Naming (47:17 – 48:24)

  • The crew jokes about the future Seattle hockey franchise, suggesting names like “Seattle Grungers,” poking fun at grunge legacy and making dark Kurt Cobain jokes.

Notable Skits, Characters & Wild Tangents

• Recurring Characters Appear

  • “Satan” (House satirical character) pops in frequently to coolly comment on Christmas, meth, social issues, and to analyze the crew's psychology.
    • Quote: "Contractors, don’t start work without a deposit. If they ain't got no money now, they ain’t gonna have it later." – JCW, with Satan joking along (42:17)
  • “Rush Limbaugh” and “Eddie Vedder” impressions make for knowingly absurd pop culture detours.
  • “Randy the Chipmunk” (nut-protection PSA) and “DJ Pre K” contribute both musical and comedic relief.
    • Randy signs off with: "Keep an eye on your nuts... and have a wonderful Christmas time." (100:47)

• Listener Pranks and Oddball Calls

  • A recurring “donkey singing” caller, wild dialects, and a Muppet-voiced woman keep the phone segments unpredictable.

• Drugs, Meth, and Outlaw Culture

  • Frequent jokes about Oklahoma being “meth capital,” and “weed in church incense burners” (with altar boys) as headlines.
  • Drug-related “What Were They On?” guessing game led by DJ Pre K.
    • Example: Woman stealing $1,600 of Girl Scout cookies = marijuana story. (124:03)

Listener Interactions & Closing Thoughts

• Listeners Sell (or Pretend to Sell) Cars

  • JCW is blunt, calling out tire-kickers, clock-watchers, and “strokes,” preferring real, ready-to-sign business.
    • Example: “You just want to call and stroke them off and get a free number so you go to the dealership and use their number against the dealer and they do all this work and get nothing done?” (23:37)

• Reflection on Show Style and Pushback

  • The show is self-aware about riding the line between wild and "too much" for national syndication.
    • Quote: "Everybody wants to watch a high wire walker... they hold the ropes in the net." (127:53)
  • Ending riffs on cars, drugs, lease advice, and a humorous “Ride of the Week” review (Kia K900, $65k luxury Kia—“wait till it’s 30 used”).

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “He wasn’t driving, he was riding. I think you give Elon Musk the DWI, Mr. Fancy Pants.” – JCW (01:15)
• “They’re gonna pro stick probes up in all of us… for sphincter testing.” – JCW (03:53)
• “We’re not a whorehouse and you are on the radio. And I’m not doing this stuff for free anymore, dammit.” – JCW (23:57)
• “We need to think like an Oklahoma tweaker… How would he break into the network to get into the file to print the check?” – JCW (15:16)
• “Don’t start work without a deposit… If they ain’t got no money now, they ain’t going to have no money halfway through.” – JCW (42:17)
• “They brought in execs from those Yankees... you can't trust Yankees... and from Philadelphia! And the Cowboys are playing Philly this week!” – JCW (62:58)
• “The only way to learn about getting screwed is to get screwed: firsthand experiences.” – JCW (42:09)
• “They just want us to sell out, Bob.” – JCW (61:19)
• “Keep an eye on your nuts... have a wonderful Christmas.” – Randy the Chipmunk (100:03)

Key Timestamps

• 00:08–01:42 — Tesla autopilot, DWI law debate
• 02:45–05:45 — Syndication, sphincter test, execs visiting, Pink Floyd “Have a Cigar”
• 05:45–13:14 — Keith Richards "interview," Rolling Stones, tour dates
• 14:32–22:23 — Remote office security, “tweaker test,” bank fraud, condom analogies
• 18:13–22:01, Ongoing — Car caller segments (price negotiations, tone-setting)
• 31:03–32:09 — Homebuilding/contractor frustration
• 36:24–44:47 — Stories about getting burned in business, lessons learned, cultural stereotypes
• 45:17–45:46 — Auction hype and buying blitz
• 61:01–63:05 — Corporate gifts, never selling out, radio folklore
• 74:42–76:33 — “Baby, It’s Cold Outside PC” parody and banter
• 100:01–100:47 — Randy the Chipmunk’s holiday message
• 124:03–125:22 — “What Were They On?” Girl Scout cookie heist guessing game
• 130:05–132:14 — Ride of the Week: Kia K900 review

Overall Tone & Takeaway

The John Clay Wolfe Show is brash, quick-witted, and unscripted, thriving on a combination of topical news, sharp car business, biting satire, and real-world war stories. It’s a mix of locker-room banter, regional roughness, and radio-anarchic comedy, unafraid of venturing into political incorrectness or taking the FCC right up to its limit.

For listeners new and old, this episode showcases why JCW and crew have built a cult following: irreverence, honesty, and their refusal to play it safe—even as the corporate eyes linger in the control room.