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It's a mailbag. Munder, you got problems there. I'm gonna help you from the comfort of my chair. It's a mailbag Monday. Hello and welcome to the J Train Podcast. This is J Train Jared Freed coming to you live. Ah. From Delray Beach, Florida. That's right, every Monday. It is a mail bag Monday, where me, the comedian, gives advice to you, the listener. And, you know, who am I to give you advice? I'm just a guy with a microphone. I'm just someone that doesn't have to make eye contact with you. That's the real power here. That's, you know, anyone could give this advice. And I'm going to be reasonable. I'm going to be thoughtful. I'm going to try and put my own biases aside side. But I, you know, I have my own biases. I, I guess I'm, I, we, we're all bias. You know, it's like my dad, you know, always says, everyone judges, everyone's judging. Do we care? Do we care? No, I, you know, I would love for you to take my advice, but I move on. I don't care. I don't need you to take my advice. This is my answer to your question. Hopefully it helps you out in some way. And if you're listening, what a great thing, you get to be on the fly, a fly on the wall for someone else's problem. Now here's my ask of you if the problem relates to something in the life of someone you've been talking to recently. And now I've given the advice that they wouldn't listen to from you. Send this episode to a friend, a coworker, a brother, a sister, a mama, a papa, anyone who needs to take their brain and put it on the shelf. Put. Send this episode to someone. My book. Yes, I have written a book, Walking Red Flag. It is out for preorder the pre order here. If you're going to buy the book at some point, buy it now. That's. That is what I will consider. I hate this word. I hate the word support. It is used against you. I believe I want to support. That's someone letting you know they're doing you a favor. There are no favors given in life. My book is funny. You going to love it. You're going to get some perspective like you get. You know, I don't have to sell this book to you. You listen to this podcast. This is so. You know what I do. It's going to be funny. It's going to be thoughtful. It's Going to be. No, I. I hate that. I. The minute it came out of my mouth, I hated that. No, I hate when people say I'm. No. Yeah, okay. We're all bull. We're all bullshitting when we're all judging the book. Pre order it because I want to be a New York Times best selling author. I. I said that to my parents last night. We were sitting around the table having dinner and my dad said, you know, I was talking about the pre order process and I'm like, well, you do pre order because all the orders go through on day one of the book and it's. Supposedly it can get you on the New York Times bestselling list. And he started laughing so uncontrollably that it was insulting. So now I want to be a New York Times bestseller to. To really make my dad think that he's died and this is some sort of weird alternate universe. He can't believe it. He can't believe that there's a book for me. So pre order the book for that reason alone. Also, you'll laugh when you read it. Walking Red flag. I got shows in New York and Toronto this weekend. Toronto's probably sold out. New York, first one sold out. We added a second one. Adding a second show has been tough for me. Hasn't been easy. I don't want to hear from you if you can't make it. Let's just keep our relationship a silent partnership. Yeah, I get annoyed. It annoys me, and I. I feel I have a right to be annoyed. I have a different relationship with the people that like my stuff. I talk with you. This is an ongoing conversation. I don't need to hear that. It doesn't have to. Well, we want to come, but it's so late. I'm not your best friend, okay? I have a product I put out there. I've. Listen, if you submit, if you like things that I do, that's great. Let's leave it at that. We can just quietly. Two ships passing in the night. I'll be on my way to my show. You'll be on the way to bed where you're not going to my show. I hope you support the sponsors. I hope you like my Instagram stuff. I hope there's other ways that I can make money from you for what I do, but if not, yeah, you're a real fucking asshole. What am I gonna say? This podcast is really turning into the rantings and ravings of a crazy person. All right, let's get to the emails. Jtrain podcast gmail.com email me so I can rant and rave about you. I have three emails in front of me. First one is thorough. I don't read these. Before we start, I want you to get a live reaction. Mailbag Monday. Jared, first off, thank you so much for all the entertainment over the last few years. You're welcome. Thank you for being involved. I love doing this. I first found you via Juliet Lippman's bachelor party podcast in 2020. Never looked back. Love, Juliet. Good friend. I was at her apartment a few weeks back. The baby is the cutest baby ever. She's wonderful. I'm writing for some advice. Okay. I recently had a birthday party at my house with some of my closest friends. Maybe like 15 people total. Everyone who was invited has been my friend for years. They write in all caps and most brought their significant others. One of my good friends will call her. Sarah has a husband. We'll call him Sean, who is not my favorite. Sean has cheated on her several times and overall just gives used car salesman vibes. Charismatic. Can talk to anyone, but it never feels genuine. I'm sure that's not helped by the fact that you've caught him cheating. He's admittedly cheated, so under that umbrella, it kind of shines the light. You know, you kind of see how the hot dog gets made. So I can understand that. Once was charismatic. It's almost. You're probably more annoyed that anyone buys his because people do. Because you are have now been proven right in some way where you're like, I don't know about that guy. He's. And then he's a cheater. You go, okay, well now everything's now. So he's probably a tough watch for you. Throughout the night, Sarah and Sean occasionally spend time in the garage where we have a TV and a garage fridge. I would love a hang. Garage. Garage hang was like such a sitcom thing. Cool guy had garage hang. Kevin James, King of Queens. He had like a garage thing going on. Okay. The next morning, my husband realized that from his six pack of 2019 Chiefs Super bowl commemorative glass Coca Cola bottles, two were missing from the garage fridge. Sounds like all the pieces are there for cheating. Sean, to be the guy who drank these very special Coca Colas, you may be thinking, so what? Big deal. No, I'm not. I'm thinking, those seem to be special Coca Colas. But you need to know my husband is a huge Chiefs fan. Season ticket holder, watches every game. Those Cokes have been in there for six years. And even my own Children know not to touch them. Is there a sign on them? I, I would assume. Listen, garage fridge, six pack with Chiefs, you know, regalia on it. I'm asking, but I, I, I guess that separates the, the good guess from the, the, the, the bad ones. I mean. Okay, I'll keep going. They carry a lot of meaning for him. And the Chiefs are something people take seriously here in Kansas City. Listen, you don't need to, like, upsell the Chiefs and the relationship with the town. Most NFL football teams. This is my, this kid. I'm annoyed at something I shouldn't be annoyed at. I, I get it. The Chiefs are important to your husband. NFL teams are weirdly important to a lot of NFL fans. This is not just the Chiefs. This is not just you. Go. Well, they're good. They've been good. Everyone's team is very important to them. I, and you don't need to go. You don't need to tell me how great the Chiefs fan relationship is to, to, to, to convince me that these were important co. That these were important Coca Cola glasses. I, I, I get it. If they were Miami Dolphin Coca Cola that came in a specialty, you know, soda can and someone was a big Dolphins fans, I wouldn't be like, well, the Dolphins kind of suck. No, they have a relationship with the Dolphins in the same way your husband has a relationship with the Chiefs. I get it. All that being said, I can't help but wonder if Sean or her husband stole the Cokes. Well, stole the Cokes is gonna be a problem for you because more likely they drank the Cokes and didn't think. You know, there's a spectrum. There's, oh, my God, these are Cokes we can't find anywhere. Let's take them. And we know they're important to your, to her husband. Or it's, oh, I'm thirsty for some Coke. There's a couple in the fridge. Yeah, grab one. And they drank the Cokes. And not knowing the importance, there is room for in between. So let's, let's stay rational. She takes the Coke, she opens them up. Sean goes, oh, my God. Those are like, those are collector's items. He's going to freak out. Oh, my God, we took them. Don't say a word. Or she says that to him. One or the other someone might know. But I'm saying there's a spectrum here. I do trust Sarah, as she has never wronged me or stolen from me in our 20 years. From years of. It is so interesting how you have gone straight to these are stolen Coca Colas. I do understand that someone could see the value in these Coca Cola, but why not take the whole set? 2. What's 2 going to do for them? To me, it's more likely, I think you've gone too far. You do deserve to have anger and emotion from this. I'm not saying you don't. I'm just saying you are going to a space that they have deniability on. So now you're not going to get answers. So they're going to go fists up when you come at them with, you stole our Coca Colas. You knew those were important to us. They're going to come back with, no, we didn't. Instead of, hey, there was a six pack of Coca Cola that means a lot to my husband in that fridge. Did anyone maybe accidentally take a Coca Cola or two? That. That's a more. Bring it in. I'm. I like. Then they go, you know what? We were in the garage. Uh, I said, sean, grab me a Coca Cola. He opened them up right away. And then we noticed they were like chief's memorabilia. We had no idea. We just thought there were Coca Colas in the fridge. We immediately felt bad. We drank them, we hid them. We. We brought them home. We thought maybe you wouldn't notice. I don't know what we thought, but we, We. We have been talking about this to this day. Like that. That, to me is more likely than let's steal their chief's memorabilia. But I'll keep going. I do trust Sarah, as she has never wronged me or stolen from me in our 20 years of friendship. But I could totally see her finding out her husband did it, maybe on the drive home and feel ashamed to not tell me. Yeah, but you labeling it as a thief, as a stolen item, to me, I don't. That's not necessarily how it had to have happened. I would also say the, The. The cheating husband who took your sodas. Yeah, maybe he's not thoughtful. Maybe he doesn't think of others. Those all kind of work into the cheating angle, too. He could be a cheater who doesn't think of the emotional, you know, attachment people have for things. And he only thinks of himself ahead of others. So it would work into the, you know, the, the character study you've given him. I would also like to note that we had cans of Coke available in that same fridge the night of the party. This is an important part, but people do like drinking from the glass Coke bottles. That is something people like. I would choose glass Coke bottle Over can any day. And even if they accidentally grabbed one as a drink, they would have realized how old they were with one sip. Way past expiration. You're. You've gone, you're over the hump of, of, of Assumption City. You're, you're, you're way out in the ocean on that one. I, I, One sip. Yeah. Then they notice and they go, holy, what are these cans? And then they go, oh, my God. We took, like, the important Coca Cola. So that even hurts your accusation that they've stolen the Cokes too. I even checked the trash. No bottles anywhere to be found. I think this was, again, there's a spectrum. Let's take those Coca Cola bottles. They're worth money. Fuck these people. Oh, my God. We've drank it from the wrong Coca Cola. These are collector items. Bring them with you home. No one can know that we took them. So there's the right and the left side of the spectrum. The answer's somewhere in the middle. You have gone straight to, they have stolen my Coca Colas. I would disagree with you. I don't think I, I, I don't think people do that to people they're friends with. Also, I don't think people want to be caught. Like, if you think about it, let's, let's say they're the most evil people alive. They. You're going to get caught. I mean, and you check the trash. Yeah. I would take. If I accidentally drank someone's collector items, then I would take the trash home with me. This is where I need advice. Do I ask Sarah about it? Yes. Honestly, even if she knew, she'd probably deny it out of embarrassment and cover for her husband. So I'm not sure what good would come from it. On the other hand, it really bothers me thinking one of my friends would steal from me. It taints the friendship. I would love to hear any thoughts you have. A Chiefs fan who may have lost more than just the playoffs. You got my thoughts. I was exactly right about this email. You are coming at this wrong. You are emotionally hurt by the Coca Cola being gone. You have a, you have a suspect, but you're coming at the suspect in an emotional way. Again, I don't know where you got stealing from. You see two Coca Colas gone from your fridge that your husband has an emotional attachment to, and you are reacting emotionally by saying someone must have stole them. I am coming at it from the angle of let's assume most people aren't psychopaths and most people are normal, just like you. And me. And maybe they accidentally drank them, saw that they drank them, said, oh, my God, bring these home with us. No one can know. And hopefully they never see. And enough time passes between now and when they find out that we are forgotten and we have failed, faded into the mist. That is a more likely scenario. So when you say, yeah, do. Sarah might deny. Will probably. When you say, Sarah will probably deny it. Yeah. If I. If someone came up to me, you stole my Coca Colas, I would say, no, I didn't. I didn't steal Ste. I zone in on steel. So if I'm you, Sarah, I got to ask you a question, and I just want to know what happened because I went to the fridge and there's a memorabilia, Coca Cola that says chiefs on it that has gone missing. And I just got to know what happened. I know you and Sean were in the garage. You guys hung out there, watched tv. You're one of the few people who went in the garage. I've already questioned everybody. I just need to know for peace of mind, because my husband is really, like, feeling down about it. And if it was a mistake, we're going to still be upset, but we'll find the capacity to, you know, to like, forgive you. I just need to know what happened because I can't even find the empty Coke bottles. See how different that is? See how that wasn't guns out. That was a hug with a whisper. Sarah, bring it in. Bring it in, Sarah. If you go in there, Sarah, bring it in. I know that you were in the garage, and I know you like to have a Coca Cola every now and again. Yeah. You're not even one of those Diet Coke people. Yeah, you go full Coca Cola. Is there a chance you took the wrong Coca Cola? Is this something? Is this something we're gonna have a problem with in the future? Like, that's what I would do. Little hug and whisper right now. I would actually say right now, you're wrong. Jtrain podcast gmail.com jtrain podcastmail.com we're sponsored. If you're refreshing your home this new year, do it with Wayfair. Wayfair is a one stop shop for everything your home needs. Accent pillows, mirrors, faux plants to brighten the living room. Beds, mattresses, bed sheets and towels for the whole family. Home, office and kitchen. Essentials for working days and family dinner, all at amazing prices. And I am huge on Wayfair. I just moved to a new apartment. Wayfair has been a huge help. I got here. I had a lot of stuff furnished but I needed some stuff like kind of some odds and ends and Wayfair just is a one stop shop. I love that you can get anything and everything and it looks good. I am a huge Wayfair fan. Wayfair lets you filter by design style and their huge selection makes it easy to personalize any space. Get organized, refreshed and back on track this new year. For way less head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's W A Y F A I R.com Wayfair every style, every home. We have a second sponsor, Hero Bread. I just had some for breakfast this morning. If you want to eat healthy but don't want to skip the bread, Hero Bread is here to save the day. Hero makes sliced bread, bagels, dinner rolls and more. Higher in fiber, lower in net carbs, zero grams of sugar. You'd never know it's low net carb and high fiber from the texture. It's soft and fluffy just like you want it to be. Check out their tortillas, croissants and buttermil biscuits. I am a hero bread eater, user lover. I put it in the toaster oven with my egg whites. In the morning it is toast. I want toast with my eggs and I'm going to get it and it's going to keep me fuller longer because it's full of fiber. If you already love Hero Bread and it tastes just like any other sliced bread, be sure to check out their biscuits, scones and noodles. I got to try the noodles. I haven't yet. This year hit your goals without giving up your favorite bready dishes. Hero bread is offering 10 10% off your order. Go to Hero Co. Use code feather. That's code featherH E R O CO. So those are our sponsors. Today I got two more emails. Fantastic. First email Jared, long time. First time with a quick question. I'm 25, have been dating a guy who's 27. We've gone on eight dates over the last two months. Things feel good overall. He's actually met my friends already by chance. When we were out, he ended up joining us for drinks. So he's folded into my world a bit this week. He texted to cancel our Sunday brunch because he forgot it was Super Bowl Sunday and he was invited to a friend's party. He did reschedule, which I appreciate. I'm not mad about the mix up, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't give me pause. Part of me wishes he'd invite me to Whatever super bowl plans he has, especially since I'm starting to want to meet his friends, too. I think I'm at the where is this going? Stage. I don't want, I don't need a huge relationship talk, but I'd like some clarity. I want to move towards exclusivity and actually start blending lives, including meeting each other's friends. How do I bring up that, how do I bring that up without sounding needy or like I'm keeping score? Help me with a reveal talk, J Train. I love this email. You reference the reveal. The reveal is saying how I feel and then closing your mouth. That's the whole thing. Say how you feel. Close your mouth. Because then they have to talk. And most people don't hear how someone feels and go, okay, cool. They know, they go on. They say how they feel, and it opens up vulnerability, produces vulnerability. I think you've already done that in your email. I think you can write, read verbatim what you wrote to me. I, I'd like some clarity. I want to move forward with exclusivity and actually start blending lives. I, well, I, I, I would go to this line. I'd be lying if I didn't. Give me, make me pause. That's a little formal. Part of me wishes you would invite me to the Super Bowl Sunday plans that you have. Because I would like to start blending our lives. That, to me is like a great. Because with the relationship talk, it's so vague, you know, my brain with what are we. Goes straight to, okay, I guess we're gonna get married and things are moving along. If you make it about something specific. Hey, I don't know what the super bowl plan is, but I kinda have nothing to do and I'd love to come with you if that's something you're up for. I don't know if this is like a guy's day, but when you canceled super bowl with me or canceled brunch with me, I was like, oh, that's something. I would like to go to and meet his friends. That's how I felt. That is you just saying how you felt. And then he has the right, hey, let me get the story on the super bowl plan. See if people are bringing their girlfriends or if this is kind of a guy's thing. If not, hey, I'd love for you to come. Or he's going to say, I'm not ready for that. Or he's going to lie to you. No. And, and he's going to realize what page you're on and he's going to end it soon. So all of this gets you what you want, which is answers. So, hey, I was a little bit upset that you canceled. Hey, I wasn't upset you canceled Sunday. I was kind of just, like, you know, felt a little bit, you know, Bru, my ego got bruised that you didn't invite me to the super bowl plan. That's something that would have been fun and casual and a great way to, like, meet your guy friends and your. Your crew. Because it sounds like a fun time. If that's something you wanted to do, I would love it. If not, and there's a reason you didn't want me to be involved in it, I would love to know. There it is. Done. That's, like a reasonable, actionable thing. Hey, it's like old friends. We watch football together. It's our fantasy league. This is something we do. I'm not ready for that yet with this crew, but I hear you. I'd love to do that in the future. That is coming up for me. I'm aware of where you are. Super Bowl. Great excuse to have this conversation. I think this is a. I love the email because you're being reasonable. What you're asking for isn't crazy. Hey, I felt a little hurt that you didn't want me to come to the Super Bowl. Even if you say, like, the tone I'm giving is a tone I would want to hear. J Train podcast gmail.com Jtrain podcast, gmail.com One more. Jared. Have been a listener since the TFM days. Huge fan. Thank you. That's so cool. I'm hoping you can help me navigate a wedding dilemma. We love a wedding dilemma. Send them in. G Train podcast. I'm getting married this summer. Congratulations. Trying to decide on how to handle speeches. Ooh, my speech went a little bit varal again. Houston, Dallas, Tempe, L.A. vancouver, Seattle. We added a second show. Jaredfree.com I got shows, but I. That. That bachelor speech, people really enjoyed it. It's on my YouTube. You can go watch it now. I don't have a bridal party, but I do have two best friends who I was made of honor. Okay, let me start this again. I'm getting married this summer trying to decide how to handle speeches. I don't have a bachelor part. I don't have a bridal party, but I do have two best friends who I was a maid of honor for their wedding. If I were signing a maid of honor, it would very clearly be one of them. Let's call her Lauren and not Samantha. Here's the problem. I would love for Lauren to give a speech, but I do not want Samantha to give a speech. Okay? Not because I don't love her. I do. But because I genuinely don't feel as close to Samantha as I do Lauren. I think she'd give an okay speech, but I. It would be sort of superficial and I feel nervous about it. This is very interesting. I love this email. This email is funny to me because it lands in the. It's in the land of female friendship. Goes very wide. You know, you were in both of their weddings, so there's this, like, weird payback that you're giving them. You're probably having them both in your wedding because they're friends too, so it would be awkward. Ax 1. This. This is all started from the same place that we are right now. You probably invited them both to be best the maid of honor because they were both. You were both made of honor in their weddings. They probably know each other, so it'd be awkward for one one and not the other. So now you did both and now you're still at the same place you started at. So I get why you'd feel nervous about it and the speech would be mean more from one. But you're. You're kind of here because you did this to yourself a little bit. However, I feel like asking one friend to speak and not the other is incredibly insulting. To make this worse, Samantha, the friend I don't want to speak, has gone above and beyond during my engagement. She planned my bachelorette, my bachelor, my Bach. She planned my bachelorette, my bridal shower, and has shown up for me in every possible way. I would feel terrible offending her, but at the same time, it's my wedding and I'd prefer Lauren to make a speech to add another wrinkle. My fiance already asked his best friend to speak at the wedding. So if I decide to have no friend speeches on my side, I worry that could be lopsided or weird. My current options seem to be. So she put in bullet points. Her options. She has a wedding coming up. Her husband to be is having his best friend speak at the wedding. She has two bridesmaids. She has one bridesmaid, she liked to speak. She has another bridesmaid, she doesn't want to speak. Here's her thoughts. No friend speeches on my side. Even though my fiance's best friend is speaking. That is not an option. Toss that away. You will be the talk of the town. It will take away and distract from your Special day. If I was at the wedding and no, no. If I was at the wedding, no friend spoke for her best friend in the world spoke for him. I would be like, oh, my God, thank God he's marrying this loser nerd who has no friends who can put together a sentence for them. So take that away. Let both friends speak and accept whatever happens. I am leaning towards that. I know you have said one speech would matter more than the other, but at that point, the one friend whose speech you don't want to hear, sure, it'll be nice. It'll be fine. At a minimum, they might. At a minimum, it's, thank you. That was nice that you said a few things that didn't really touch me at all. At a maximum, it's. Wow, I had no idea you felt that way. I didn't think you could put together such a speech. Maybe, like, honestly, the friend you don't want to speak might get up there and go, listen, I don't know why I'm talking here for you. We haven't been that close. And then you'd be like, whoa, she gets it. And then it gets you the. Then it alleviates all awkwardness. What I would say is, I don't want this to turn into the lesser friend trying to glom on the better friend and saying, hey, let's do it together. I would say if you say to them, I want you both to speak of my wedding, but I want you both to speak individually to. That's you getting ahead and making sure you get the speech of your dreams. So now you'll get lesser speech with better speech. But at least if you put together a wedding video, you can kind of cut her out and it can just look like you had the two great speeches from your husband's best friend and your best friend. So honestly, it's like, if it didn't get on Instagram, it didn't happen. So you can kind of Photoshop her out afterwards and it will be like it never happened. No one will remember it. The other option, let only one speak and live with the emotional fallout. No, why would you do that to yourself? Why would you create issues where no issue needs to be created? Honestly, the friend who you don't want speaking probably doesn't want to speak anyways, and the friendship is surviving by a thread. And you really. This would end it in a way I. I don't want. I. I think it would be much sadder to go from maid of honor to nothing because of one little thing that you have about them. Giving the speech and maybe taking away from the better speech. I. I don't think that's a way to go. And I don't think this is a. This is from the male side of things. I. I understand our male friendships, not as deep, not as thoughtful, aren't as really engaged as female friendships, but this is one you can learn from the men in your life. We don't just go up to a Jenga tower that's wobbling and start shaking around. Around it. We don't do that. We see a wobbly Jenga tower and we go, all right, just gonna fade away. This is you going up to a friendship and rattling the cage. You don't need to do it. I'm having a welcome party the night before. That is more casual. Perhaps they can both speak then. Or have Samantha speak then and have Lauren speak at the wedding. That's the move. That's your answer. Hey, I put a lot of thought about it. No, this is it. What's the best path forward here? Thank you. I. I got your answer. This is the answer. Don't, don't, don't. If you don't do this, you're the problem. You're the drama. You go to both of your bridesmaids, and you make it about math and weight and keeping things symmetrical. Hey, Samantha, Lauren, big weddings coming up. I know you guys are preparing your maid of honor speeches. My fiance has one best friend giving a speech at the wedding. We want to keep things symmetrical. We don't want to get out of control with time. And then you make it sound like you're doing it off the top of your head. You go, so we're going to do. At the rehearsal dinner, we're going to have one of you speak, and at the wedding, we're going to have another one of you speak. It's because of the wedding planner. They're weird about symmetry. They say it's like a good luck thing. They say when there's, like, two people who speak at the wedding and it's uneven with the husband, it's. It's like a bad marriage is going to happen. It's all bad luck. They're Greek. They have a lot of Greek things that they get into. This is. I'm. I'm giving you the answer to this question. I feel proud of myself. I. And if you don't take it, you're the problem. You're the problem. You're just looking to make a mess where no mess needs to be made. So I'm just saying I'm getting annoyed at you not taking this advice. Our wedding planner is Greek. Greek. If, if you're not Greek, Everyone knows they do weird. They're, they're voodoo magic people. So, yeah, the wedding planner is Greek. They have this weird thing about bad luck if you have asymmetrical speeches. So here's how we're going to play it. Samantha, you're going to do the wedding. Lauren, you're going to do. Oh, no. You want Lauren at the wedding. So Samantha is the lesser bridesmaid. Samantha, so you're. We decided. I picked out of a hat. You're gonna do the rehearsal dinner. Lauren's gonna do the wedding. I hope you guys are cool with this. But this is kind of the way we just picked it out of a hat. Just randomly. I was like, yeah, you'll do the wedding. And that's all you have to say? So you put it on the wedding planner. You put it on this. Voodoo, magic, bad luck, superstitious, you put it on symmetry. It has nothing to do with the relationship and how. You really think that one bridesmaid is a lesser human being than the other? There it is, done. You're welcome. I, I, I can't believe I don't have the biggest podcast in the world based on that answer. I can't believe anyone goes anywhere else for advice other than here. J Train podcast back next week. Boom.