The Knife: A True Crime Podcast
Episode: The Kill List
Release Date: June 5, 2025
Hosts: Hannah Smith and Paisha Eaton
Produced by: Exactly Right and iHeartPodcasts

Introduction

In this gripping episode of The Knife: A True Crime Podcast, hosts Hannah Smith and Paisha Eaton delve into a harrowing experience shared by a woman, referred to as Susan, whose life was upended by the revelation that she was on a terrorist organization's kill list. Through Susan's first-person narrative, the episode explores the profound psychological and emotional toll of being targeted by such a sinister threat.

Susan's Story: The Unexpected Encounter (02:07 – 07:30)

Susan begins by painting a picture of her ordinary life. A single mother and successful business owner in the Midwest, she describes her routine: juggling work with her daughter's soccer practice, managing a manufacturing business with around 70 employees, and striving to provide a living wage for her staff.

Key Moment: The Initial Revelation

During the summer of 2016, Susan's normal day took a drastic turn when an individual, claiming to be an FBI agent, approached her at her office.

Susan: "I'm here. The FBI has a duty to inform you that we have learned that there is a Middle Eastern terrorist group that issues kill lists."
(Timestamp: 06:00)

Despite the claim, Susan immediately sensed something was amiss. The person was visibly nervous, clutching a laptop and folders, which contradicted her perception of an FBI agent's demeanor.

Verification Attempt

Suspecting foul play, Susan took a prudent step by consulting her CEO.

Susan: "I need to go talk to somebody... He doesn't seem like it. He's really nervous."
(Timestamp: 08:27)

Her CEO confirmed the authenticity of the agent, but shockingly, Susan learned that she was one of only two individuals in her state on the kill list. The agent provided no apparent reason for her inclusion, leading Susan to question:

Susan: "I am in this by myself."
(Timestamp: 13:20)

Law Enforcement's Response: A Mixed Bag (07:30 – 16:23)

Upon receiving the confirmation, Susan reached out to her father, who then contacted the FBI. The FBI advised Susan to inform her local sheriff's department, hoping to keep the threat confidential and manageable.

Dismal Reactions:

However, the responses she received amplified her fears rather than alleviating them.

Susan: "The sheriff's dispatch person... we spent like 20 minutes talking about my cat."
(Timestamp: 15:57)

Her partner remained unconcerned, further isolating Susan in her distress.

Introduction of the SWAT Team:

The situation escalated when a county SWAT team arrived at her home, offering tangible security but simultaneously intensifying her anxiety.

Susan: "They walked me around my yard because I have a lot of landscaping... It's so real."
(Timestamp: 18:56)

Escalation of the Threat: From Abstract to Concrete (16:23 – 27:43)

Susan's fear deepened as she received information about a local sympathizer involved with the terrorist group. This individual lived merely 45 minutes away, rendering the threat immediate and personal.

Real-Life Parallels:

The hosts contextualize Susan's experience by referencing real cases where individuals were targeted by terrorist sympathizers within the United States:

• 2014: Ali Muhammad Brown killed four people in retaliation for U.S. policies in the Middle East.
• 2019: Rondell Henry's thwarted attack in D.C., inspired by a 2016 terrorist act in France.

Susan's Realization:

Susan: "I was starting to be in this very weird suspended place... I was in a big vat of trauma."
(Timestamp: 26:41)

Desperate for safety, Susan temporarily relocated, where she attempted to reclaim some semblance of normalcy, albeit through distressing means.

Coping Mechanisms and Emotional Fallout (27:43 – 46:04)

Over approximately three weeks, Susan's life became dominated by fear and uncertainty. The constant surveillance and lack of concrete answers eroded her sense of security and well-being.

Mental Health Struggles:

Susan: "I felt so alone... I could hardly eat, I could not sleep."
(Timestamp: 24:02)

Through sleepless nights and relentless fear, Susan grappled with feelings of isolation, compounded by the dismissive attitudes of those around her.

Turning Point: Acceptance:

Ultimately, Susan reached a psychological breakthrough by choosing to no longer allow fear to dictate her life.

Susan: "I'm not gonna participate in your little terrorist shenanigans... I'm done."
(Timestamp: 45:13)

Discussion and Insights (46:04 – 53:57)

The hosts and Susan explore the broader implications of terrorist kill lists, highlighting their potential purpose to incite lone-wolf attacks among domestic sympathizers. Research cited by Matthew Levitt suggests these lists are strategic tools for terrorist organizations to leverage domestic support for their violent agendas.

Purpose of Kill Lists:

Paisha Eaton: "They [terrorist organizations] would love to take responsibility for an attack... in your own state."
(Timestamp: 50:23)

Real-world examples underscore the lethality of these threats, emphasizing the critical need for effective law enforcement responses and psychological support for victims like Susan.

Conclusion: Moving Forward (53:57 – End)

As the episode wraps up, Susan reflects on her journey from fear to acceptance. She emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's emotional response, even in the face of genuine threats.

Susan: "I live alone with my animals, and I can lay in bed and be afraid, or I cannot. And at this point, there's no way in hell I'm going to let somebody else dictate whether or not I'm laying in bed feeling afraid."
(Timestamp: 43:51)

Hosts' Reflections:

Hannah Smith and Paisha Eaton commend Susan's resilience and discuss the importance of empathetic responses from those around victims of such terrifying experiences. They highlight the psychological burden of feeling dismissed and the critical need for supportive networks.

Hannah Smith: "It's so scary to be in your home and think that someone might be actively trying to kill you."
(Timestamp: 52:03)

Susan's story serves as a poignant reminder of the unseen battles many face and the profound impact of true crime on individual lives.

Key Takeaways

• Psychological Impact: Being placed on a terrorist kill list can have devastating effects on one's mental health, leading to anxiety, insomnia, and feelings of isolation.

• Law Enforcement Response: The mixed reactions from law enforcement can exacerbate victims' fears, highlighting the need for better support systems.

• Purpose of Kill Lists: Terrorist organizations may use kill lists to inspire lone-wolf attacks, leveraging domestic individuals to carry out their agendas.

• Coping Mechanisms: Personal resilience and acceptance are crucial for victims to regain control over their lives amidst ongoing threats.

• Support Systems: Empathetic and understanding responses from family, friends, and authorities are essential in helping victims navigate their trauma.

Notable Quotes

• Susan on the Initial Encounter:
  "The FBI has a duty to inform you that we have learned that there is a Middle Eastern terrorist group that issues kill lists."
  (06:00)

• Susan on Feeling Alone:
  "I am in this by myself."
  (13:20)

• Susan on Acceptance:
  "I'm not gonna participate in your little terrorist shenanigans... I'm done."
  (45:13)

• Hannah on Fear:
  "It's so scary to be in your home and think that someone might be actively trying to kill you."
  (52:03)

Final Thoughts

Susan's ordeal underscores the complex interplay between genuine threats and the psychological aftermath they produce. The Knife: A True Crime Podcast not only sheds light on the mechanics of such threats but also delves deep into the human experience of living under constant fear. Through empathetic storytelling and thorough analysis, the episode invites listeners to reflect on the broader societal and psychological implications of true crime beyond the headlines.

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