The Kristen Boss Podcast

Episode 231 – Part 2: The Fall
Host: Kristen Boss
Release Date: September 22, 2025

Episode Overview

In this raw, vulnerable solo episode, Kristen Boss shares the most difficult chapter in her personal and entrepreneurial journey: the fall after building a multi-million dollar empire, and the unraveling of her identity, business, and sense of self-worth. Following last week’s "the rise" episode, Kristen describes the warning signs she overlooked, her season of “invincibility,” the spiraling consequences of tying her value to her business' success, and the very real dangers of achievement addiction—including suicidal thoughts and the near-collapse of her marriage. She concludes the episode at her lowest point, setting up next week's continuation on healing and recovery.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The True Cost of Chasing Business Validation

[04:25 – 16:30]

• Kristen shares how, despite outward success, her entrepreneurial journey masked a deeper need for validation, safety, and belonging.
• She outlines a feedback loop where business wins became her emotional "fix":

  “Am I loved? Am I safe? Do I matter? …My business answered them all for me.”

• The highs of large cash infusions and launches created an addiction to “winning” and the feeling of being irreplaceable.
• She admits to not recognizing or denying the warning lights flashing on her “emotional dashboard,” likening ignored emotional warning signs to the check engine light in a car.

“My business, in many ways, was becoming my supplier. Like a drug dealer, I would go to my business and it would give me what I needed.” — Kristen Boss [12:40]

2. Warning Signs and Seasons of Invincibility

[16:31 – 28:10]

• Kristen describes her sense of invincibility and the denial that anything could go wrong, even while witnessing peers burn out.
• She identifies warning signs she dismissed as “normal entrepreneur problems”:
  • Feeling pressure to always “win bigger”—every launch needing to outperform the last.
  • The anxiety and restlessness in between these highs.
  • An inability to separate self-worth from business results.
• Kristen reveals she felt expendable and feared irrelevance, leading to exhaustion that surpassed any external workload.

“It wasn’t my calendar that exhausted me… It was the mental and emotional conditions I had subjected myself to that was killing me slowly.” — Kristen Boss [26:55]

3. Dissociation and Escape Mechanisms

[28:11 – 38:20]

• When business success no longer provided her emotional fix, Kristen emotionally shut down and disconnected, describing a period of intense numbness and escapism.
• She used compulsive reading as her escape, binging on fiction to numb reality:

  “If you’re doing something and you’re justifying it by saying, ‘I’m not hurting anyone,’ check in with yourself. That’s a huge warning sign.” [32:00]

• She also highlights having resources to “buy her way out of” any uncomfortable emotion, whether through travel, shopping, or distractions, rather than confronting pain.

4. The Spiral: From Disconnection to Catastrophe

[38:21 – 50:50]

• Kristen describes the emotional unraveling—shoving down emotions, longing to run away, and secret fantasies of temporary escape ("getting sick enough to be in the hospital so no one would need me").
• The overwhelming responsibility for her team and family only increased her anxiety:

  “Under the weight of the responsibility, I was crumbling. …I was drowning, and I was like, I don’t know how to fix this.” — [47:00]

5. The Breaking Point: Exposure and Consequences

[50:51 – 1:06:25]

• Kristen candidly recounts the moment she was "found out"—away from home, seeking validation in “catastrophic ways to my marriage.”
• She references a friend once telling her that being discovered—having the truth come out—was the best thing to happen to them.
• During her darkest hours, while alone in luxury hotels for keynote speaking, the only things that kept her alive were professional commitments and the loving intervention of friends.
• She describes the moment of total self-loathing:

  “I had never hated myself so much as I did in that moment.” [58:18]

• The episode details the power of unconditional love—a friend sitting with her in her lowest moment, and friends supporting her husband.

Memorable Quote:

“There is nothing better than someone who can love you in that moment, who can get in a Ritz Carlton bathrobe with you, order room service while you are falling apart and ... say, I still love you and you’re still worthy. I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than that.” — Kristen Boss [58:35]

6. Contemplating Suicide and the Significance of Being Needed

[1:06:26 – 1:14:25]

• Kristen shares with brutal honesty the 72 hours where she seriously considered ending her life, finding herself clinging to her next commitment—a keynote speech—as a reason to survive.
• The comedown after each speech was “terrifying,” and she reveals that friends stayed on the phone with her so she wouldn’t be alone overnight.
• Despite deep shame and fear, she finally chose to go home, prioritizing saving her family over business opportunities.

“There are 5,000 people waiting for me to deliver this. I literally would fight until the next time I get on stage.” [1:10:10]

7. Choosing Radical Ownership and Beginning the Work

[1:14:26 – 1:27:00]

• Returning home meant facing the full consequences, not just of her actions but of how she got to this place.
• With support from her husband, Kristen began the long process of healing, focusing first on herself, then her family and marriage.
• A therapist told her the difference between managing consequences (damage control) and doing the deep personal work. Kristen chose the latter.

“After a major life crisis, there are typically two responses… We always have to look for when someone’s actually ready to heal. And when someone’s ready to heal, it’s—they are beyond doing image management or crisis management to just make the pain go away.” — Kristen Boss’s therapist [1:19:50]

8. Twelve-Step Recovery and Humbling Realizations

[1:27:01 – 1:35:52]

• Though not struggling with substance addiction, Kristen recognized the addictive pattern of her success and validation seeking. She joined an anonymous 12-step program while on vacation with her family.
• The kindness she found in that virtual room full of strangers offered her the first glimmer of hope and acceptance.

“Hi, I’m Kristen and I’m sitting here in Hawaii at a family vacation in a five star hotel and I blew my life up. And I think I have a problem. And that was the start.” [1:33:22]

9. Unconditional Love, Empathy, and the Path Forward

[1:35:53 – end]

• Kristen concludes by acknowledging the transformation that comes through being loved in your darkest moments.
• She links her newfound empathy to her own suffering and reiterates the need to let others in, to accept help, and to believe in the possibility of redemption—even when it feels undeserved.
• She hints at next week’s episode, which will focus on the healing process and what’s changed since.

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “My business, in many ways, was becoming my supplier. Like a drug dealer, I would go to my business and it would give me what I needed.”
  — Kristen Boss [12:40]

• “It wasn’t my calendar that exhausted me... It was the mental and emotional conditions I had subjected myself to that was killing me slowly.”
  — Kristen Boss [26:55]

• “If you’re doing something and you’re justifying it by saying, ‘I’m not hurting anyone,’ check in with yourself. That’s a huge warning sign.”
  — Kristen Boss [32:00]

• “There is nothing better than someone who can love you in that moment… I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than that.”
  — Kristen Boss [58:35]

• “After a major life crisis, there are typically two responses… we want to make sure you’re doing the work for the right reasons.”
  — Kristen Boss echoing her therapist [1:19:50]

• “Hi, I’m Kristen and I’m sitting here in Hawaii at a family vacation in a five star hotel and I blew my life up. And I think I have a problem.”
  — Kristen Boss [1:33:22]

• “In your darkest moments, it is not weakness to cry for help and to say I’m not okay. It is the most extraordinary act of courage to say I’m not okay and I need help.”
  — Kristen Boss [end]

Important Timestamps

| Timestamp | Topic/Quote | |----------------|-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 04:25 – 09:20 | The insidious search for validation in entrepreneurship; business as false supplier | | 12:40 | Memorable quote: “My business, in many ways, was becoming my supplier. Like a drug dealer...” | | 16:31 – 26:55 | Seasons of invincibility and ignored warning signs; exhaustion not from workload but self-concept | | 26:55 | Memorable quote: “It wasn’t my calendar that exhausted me... It was the mental and emotional conditions...” | | 28:11 – 38:20 | Deepening dissociation; compulsive escape into fiction reading; “not hurting anybody” as a warning sign | | 32:00 | Memorable quote: “If you’re doing something and you’re justifying it by saying, ‘I’m not hurting anyone’...” | | 50:51 – 58:35 | The breaking point: being “found out”; seeking validation in damaging ways; friend’s compassion in a hotel room | | 58:35 | Memorable quote: “There is nothing better than someone who can love you in that moment...” | | 1:06:26 – 1:14:25 | Suicidal ideation; clinging to keynote commitments as reason to live | | 1:19:50 | Therapist distinction: image management vs. true healing | | 1:27:01 – 1:33:22 | Entering 12-step recovery; “Hi, I’m Kristen...I blew my life up. And I think I have a problem.” | | 1:35:53 – end | Lessons on unconditional love; moving toward empathy; preview of next episode’s theme of healing |

Episode Tone & Language

• Tone: Raw, confessional, unflinchingly honest, compassionate, and ultimately hopeful (even when describing despair).
• Language: Authentic, emotionally charged, self-reflective, peppered with analogies to addiction, escape, and emotional “dashboard lights.”

Final Thoughts

Kristen’s story in this episode is a cautionary tale for high achievers and entrepreneurs about what can happen when business becomes a source of self-worth, validation, and identity. Her willingness to share her darkest moments offers listeners permission to acknowledge their own struggles, accept help, and believe in the possibility of healing and redemption.

To Be Continued: Next week—Kristen shares her healing journey and the turning point toward self-restoration and healthier success.