Brandy Explains Loving Ray J From A Distance: When Family Becomes Too Much

Summary

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Podcast Summary: “Love Them From A Distance: When Family Becomes Too Much”

The Latest with Loren LoRosa — April 9, 2026 (Black Effect Podcast Network & iHeartPodcasts)

Episode Overview

This episode of The Latest with Loren LoRosa dives deep into the complicated realities of family relationships and the difficult but sometimes necessary decision to create distance from certain family members. Using the backdrop of Brandy’s newly publicized decision to step back from brother Ray J, Loren opens a candid and relatable conversation about generational expectations, sibling dynamics, healthy boundaries, and the power (and struggle) of self-protection—even when it comes to those closest to us. Joined by regular guest Brandon and a caller named Sophie, the discussion navigates personal stories of family friction, lessons learned, and how cultural backgrounds shape these dynamics.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Checking In: Burnout and Creative Passion

Timestamps: 04:44–07:31

• Loren opens up about experiencing ebbs and flows in creative motivation, describing how even when you love your work, it can sometimes feel like the fire isn’t always burning bright.
  • “Sometimes I feel like my fire isn’t as lit as other times, and it changes the way I enjoy what I’m doing...I’m such a passion person that I hate that.” — Loren (05:12)
• Brandon reassures: it’s natural to have ups and downs, and “the lows will make the highs feel that much better.” (05:35)
• Loren relates this to “adulting”—accepting that chasing your dreams isn’t always full of optimism and butterflies.

2. Main Topic Introduction: When Family Dynamics Get Complicated

Timestamps: 07:31–09:58

• The episode was inspired by Brandy’s remarks about needing distance from Ray J, noting, “she’s choosing to just take a distance from Ray J, because a lot of the things that he’s doing right now, she just doesn’t support.” (07:48)
• Loren brings personal context, reflecting on her sibling relationship and her empathy for Brandy, especially the feeling of being “the shadow” versus “the light” as siblings’ roles differ.

3. Personal Stories: When Family Becomes Too Much

Timestamps: 09:58–13:42

• Brandon shares a story about an aunt who held on to a grudge from when he was a child, highlighting how family members may have long memories and strict standards, especially within his African household.
  • “She held that beef...she was talking about when I was seven years old and I was playing with toys and I ignored her.” — Brandon (10:53)
• Loren emphasizes cultural differences in family dynamics, especially when it comes to setting boundaries, and jokes about “Africans gonna be on your ass” for Brandon’s comments (10:53).
• Both share frustrations about family members who bring back negative gossip or fail to let go of past slights.
  • “If you always call me, telling me what someone said about me, I don’t like those people...” — Loren (11:56)

4. Dealing with Public Criticism and Internet Slander

Timestamps: 15:41–18:51

• Candor about how public-facing work (Lauren in particular) invites unsolicited commentary; Loren details dealing with negative comments on social media and learning not to let it affect her deeply.
  • “I have no hate in my heart...but I just don’t feel like the—I don’t want to have to cuss him out because he’s my dad—and I don’t want to have to do that.” — Loren (23:45)
• Practical approach: sometimes you have to tune out the noise and focus on the love and support that matters.

5. On the Line: Listener Call with Sophie – Boundaries, Sibling Roles, and Hyper-Independence

Timestamps: 19:19–33:41

Sophie's Story

• Sophie from New Jersey calls in and shares her experience distancing herself from her biological father due to unhealthy dynamics while affirming she doesn’t hate him or her family.
  • “It's not that I don't like my family or hate my family. It's just I need something different right now in my life. And I'm growing and I'm changing.” — Sophie (20:07)
• She touches on being the “black sheep” (in a family of business professionals, she chose film), feeling less-than, and sometimes even needing space from her high-achieving sister whom she loves but resents being compared to.
  • “Even though that’s my best friend...I kind of got this feeling sometimes that my dad had more of a relationship with my sister...sometimes I have to distance myself from my sister.” — Sophie (28:03)

Loren & Brandon’s Reflections

• Loren empathizes and shares her own complicated relationship with her father, including periods of estrangement:
  • “There are certain things you should never say to me. You should never want me to accept that from a man. So you, as my father, shouldn't do it either.” — Loren (23:20)
• They discuss cultural scripts around “you only get one parent” versus personal boundaries and self-care.
• Brandon provides insight on not letting sibling success or family comparison erode closeness:
  • “Don’t let that interfere with the love you have for each other...there’s ways you can make it look good.” — Brandon (31:17)
• Loren urges, “If you have to distance yourself for what you need to do, distance yourself. Do it. Brandy’s doing it herself. Make sure you win.” (33:03)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “You can be passionate. You can love what you do, but, like, you're not going to love every day is what I've had to tell myself.” — Loren (07:31)
• “I never want him to feel like he’s in—like, a no way out situation because there’s been this shadow cast over him...but the shadow is naturally there because he’s my brother and he's younger than me.” — Loren (08:29)
• “You don't know what it's like to be in your shadow, because you're not the shadow, you're the light.” — Loren recalling her brother’s words (08:18)
• “It’s not that I don’t like my family or hate my family. It’s just I need something different right now in my life.” — Sophie (20:07)
• “Sometimes the distance that you might feel from a person when they choose to choose themselves, it’s not even about you. Sometimes that person is locking in and kind of surrounding themselves with something that blocks out the noise…” — Loren (30:10)
• "If you have to distance yourself for what you need to do, distance yourself. Do it. … Just win. You know, I mean. And pray." — Loren & Brandon (33:03–33:14)

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Important Timestamps

• Ebb & Flow of Creative Motivation: 04:44–07:31
• Brandy & Ray J, Sibling Dynamics: 07:31–09:58
• Strict/Unforgiving Family Members (Aunt’s Old Grudges): 09:58–13:42
• Dealing with Internet Slander: 15:41–18:51
• Sophie’s Call: Family Boundaries, Sibling Comparison: 19:19–33:41
• Advice & Closing Reflections: 33:03–34:22

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Tone & Style

The conversation is authentic, humorous, and vulnerable, peppered with relatable stories and real-life examples. Loren and Brandon banter naturally, mix in personal anecdotes, and keep things grounded even in the face of tough topics. Sophie’s contribution adds depth as a listener story, and all parties emphasize empathy, protection of self, and hope.

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Takeaways

• Family relationships are complicated, and sometimes stepping back is necessary for self-growth and protection of peace—even if you still love them.
• Sibling comparison and roles can deeply affect individual self-worth, sometimes requiring boundaries.
• Adulting and chasing dreams come with natural ups and downs, and feeling burned out doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path.
• Internet noise and criticism is real, but focusing on true support and setting boundaries can help protect your mental health.
• Culturally and generationally, expectations about family closeness vary—but it’s okay to do what works for you.

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If you’re seeking advice or comfort in your own family struggles, this episode delivers honesty, perspective, and a reassuring sense that you’re not alone in needing to love some folks—from a distance.

Transcript

[Lauren LaRosa]

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[Lauren LaRosa]

Hey, y', all, it's Lauren LaRosa with the latest with Lauren LaRosa on Black Effect. And I cannot wait to see you guys at the fourth annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. We are coming back to Atlanta, Georgia on Saturday, April 25th at Pullman Yard. And it's hosted by me alongside DJ Envy and Charlamagne. The God. We got Drink Chance with Noriega and DJ efn. We got Keep it Positive, Sweetie with my girl Crystal Renee Hayslet. We got Reality with the King with my guide and my brother Carlos King. And y' all know he does reality commentary like nobody can. Now we also have Don't Call Me White Girl, the podcast I Love Mona, and Club 520 podcast along with the Grits and Eggs podcast. So this lineup stacked, baby. You're also going to want to check out the panels that we have lined up too, featuring Kev on Stage, Tika Sumpter and John Hope Bryant, just to name a few. Of course, it's way bigger than podcast. We're bringing the Black Effect marketplace with black owned businesses, plus the food truck court to keep you fed while you visit us. Okay, listen, you don't want to miss this. Tap in and grab your ticket [e-mail] podcast festival. Let's get to it. Time to do it. I'm the homegirl that knows a little bit about everything and everybody exclusive.

[Brandon]

No, she don't lie about that.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Right?

[Movie Trailer Announcer]

Lauren came in hot.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Hey, y', all, what's up? It's Lauren LaRosa. And this is the latest with Lauren LaRosa. This is your daily dig on all things pop culture, entertainment news, and all of the conversations that shake the room, baby. Back on the grind. Now checking in behind the scenes of the grind, which for the low riders here on the podcast that have been listening, you guys know, means this is, you know, where we just find out how we're doing. Like, it's the time where you stop and say, hey, how are you feeling? For everybody that is new here, that was the definition. And I actually want you to take some time to do it as I do it as well. So we have Brandon on the podcast with us today.

[Brandon]

Thank you for having me back again, Lauren.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yes, yes. So checking in behind the scenes of the grind. I right now am just feeling very motivated. I go through periods of times sometimes where like, I'm just like, head down doing the work so much that like, my. I wouldn't even say it's my motivation, but like, just my. Like, you know how, like, there's that, like, spark, like, when you're really excited about something, sometimes it becomes.

[Brandon]

The fire is lit under you.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yes. Yes, that's it. Like, the fire is lit. Sometimes I feel like my fire isn't as lit as other times, and it changes the way I enjoy what I'm doing. And I don't.

[Brandon]

Ebbs and flows and different, but it's

[Lauren LaRosa]

like, I don't know how to control that. I feel like it's life and you can't control it, but I don't. I'm such a, like, passion person that I hate that.

[Brandon]

I don't think you need to control it, because the lows will, you know, make the highs feel that much better. So I don't think you need to be on 10 all the time.

[Lauren LaRosa]

But I love being on tape. Time to go.

[Brandon]

This is why y' all made me call you a crackhead, by the way.

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[Brandon]

I never heard you make that noise before. Leave that in.

[Lauren LaRosa]

That was kind of crackhead. Yo, play that back. I don't know. It's just because I'm so passionate about the things that I do, and I love the things I do. Like, I love talking to the people, the lowriders here, you know, the latest with long. The rose of the podcast. I loved just talking through everything, celebrity news. And I don't even think it's just being in people's business. I think I just love conversation. Like, I'm a people's person. I love to talk. I love to ignite conversation. I love to engage. So I'm always excited about anything creative that does that, whether it's the reporting, it's fashion, like, you know, so for me, whenever I don't feel that fire under me, if, like, sometimes I'm. I. I'm, like, sitting, and I'm wondering, like, all right, is this burnout? Am I doing something too much? Like, too much of something? Am I not resting the way I should be? Like, I just start going down this rabbit hole of, like, why do I feel that way? And then I just recently realized, like, no, girl, as an adult, sometimes that's just life where, like, the fire isn't lit as much sometimes as it is others. So, yeah, so, yeah, I've had to. I've had to teach myself that, you know, it's just adulting now. You got to deal with your real life when you're dealing with your dreams as well, too. It's not all just, like, Optimism and, you know, butterflies and lies.

[Brandon]

It's great advice. Great advice, Lauren. No, I'm saying I'm not. I don't be sound sarcastic when I say things, and I've noticed that about myself if you say that. But I'll be serious. That's. That's, like, great to hear, you know, somebody that's, you know, a few years younger than you. So I'm like that.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You can. You can be passionate. You can love what you do, but, like, you're not going to love every day is what I've had to tell myself. So. So, yes, but there is always another day. And we are about to get on the line for on the line with Lauren LaRosa and. And talk about, you know, something that I feel like also has a lot of its ebbs and flows, and that's relationships with family, period. Like, that's all you got to say about that. Because Brandy is out, and she's promoting her new book, Phases. It's a memoir. It is currently out right now. And in promoting that, she's been having conversations about her relationship with her brother Ray J, and where they stand. And she was talking to Parade magazine. She covered their magazine, and they asked her, how is Ray J doing? And this is what she had to say. Right now, she's choosing to just take a distance from Ray J, because a lot of the things that he's doing right now, she just doesn't support. Look, y' all know we love Ray J. Here at the Latest with Lauren LaRosa. If you haven't checked out some of me and Ray J's exclusive interviews, please check them out. You will see exactly what Brandi is talking about. All the stuff that Brandi is saying that Ray J has been doing, you will see exactly what she was talking about. I'm sorry, Brandi. Maybe I was a catalyst for the bs But I think the reason why I have so much empathy and so much patience for Ray J is because I have a younger brother who doesn't always get it right. And I know what it's like to be the sister in that situation who, like, everybody thinks gets it right all the time and kind of what the opposing party goes through. Like, you're almost like my little brother for the first time. We had a conversation, and he was telling me, like, I remember this. This sticks with me to this day. He said, you don't know. You don't know what it's like to be in your shadow, because you're not the shadow. You're the light. And I was like, damn. Like, as a person that loves my sibling, like, I never want him to feel like he's in, like, a no way out situation because there's been this shadow cast over him. But he does. There's. There's no. Like, the shadow is naturally there because he's my brother and he's younger than me. So I think sometimes, you know, being that sibling makes you do things and explore things and just kind of go like, the very irrational way. So I can understand Brandy feeling like, you know, the distance. I've been through that as well, too. But you. The. The love is so unconditional in a brother, sister relationship or just with family sometimes. But there are people who create that distance and don't ever go back. I don't know if you've had similar situations. I know your family is very.

[Brandon]

I feel like I told the same story.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Very strict.

[Brandon]

I think we did a holiday story. Holiday episode.

[Movie Trailer Announcer]

Right?

[Brandon]

Yeah, I was here. I feel like I'm about to tell the same exact.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Oh, that same aunt?

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Lauren LaRosa]

That scarred you.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I did. Not like that. Like, she was. Well, for those of you who don't remember, I had a. Who hadn't seen it.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Wait, tell them. You gotta tell them you're African first. You gotta tell them first that I'm African? Yes.

[Brandon]

Does that add con? I don't know.

[Lauren LaRosa]

I think it does. Because every time I listen to you or sim talk about your families and your backgrounds, I feel like some of the strictness and like, the. Like, the no games don't play is so different than my household was because of your background.

[Brandon]

And I feel like sometimes it comes out as like. Like a lack of empathy.

[Lauren LaRosa]

And I feel like you can be like that sometimes. I tell him that all the time. I'm like, damn, Brandon. Like, but.

[Brandon]

But. So, yeah, this I hadn't seen in years.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Wait, Africans. Don't be mad at me for saying that.

[Brandon]

That's too late now. I asked the Africans gonna be on your ass this who makes it out alive. So, yeah, I didn't see her in years. And then, like, I didn't even know I was going to see her this day at a function or whatever. It's like, oh, I'm not going to say your name. I go for a hug and she's like, no, I'm not hugging you, because last time I see you ignore me. And she's talking about when I was 7 years old and I was playing with toys and I wasn't. And I ignored her. So she held that beef.

[Lauren LaRosa]

So she don't fool with you. So you to Ray J,

[Brandon]

That's. That's. That's a tough comparison because I was just playing with toys and Ray J. Yeah. But, yeah, I guess I am. And I guess I had another cousin who. I mean, these are not like, serious situations. This doesn't really happen to me. So maybe this story could be a reach about a cousin who, like, every time she'll come back to me. Like, she'll come back to me about how somebody says I'm bad about me.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Oh, yeah, I don't like those.

[Brandon]

He always. And then she would also, like, snitch on me, too. Yeah, she always had a story like. So this about. You know, why everybody talking about me to you?

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yes. I don't like those people. If you always call me, telling me what someone said about me, I don't like those people because I feel like number one. Even if it's just something that you're seeing on Internet, why is that all that you're ever seeing when it comes to me? Like, you know what I mean? Or all you're ever calling and I try not to be that person.

[Brandon]

Yours is different because. Yeah, they're gonna bring back.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah, no, my friends. No, my friends. Like, my friends.

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[Lauren LaRosa]

For real. They don't even. It gotta be. It could be the craziest thing. They don't. They don't even bring it to me because I feel like they think I'm. I'm going through it in real time.

[Brandon]

And also because they be calling you, like, bald headed on Twitter and stuff like that and gets back to you. So I know that's tough, but. What did you say?

[Lauren LaRosa]

What?

[Brandon]

No, that was just an example.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You what?

[Brandon]

You f. No, I saw one yesterday. That's why I.

[Lauren LaRosa]

What?

[Brandon]

I didn't send it. I just saw it.

[Lauren LaRosa]

All right? Brandon just called me bald head.

[Brandon]

I did. Not that the person on Twitter called you bald head.

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[Lauren LaRosa]

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On the Serving Pancakes podcast, conversations about volleyball go beyond the court.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Today we have a little best friend compatibility test.

[Serving Pancakes Podcast Host]

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[Lauren LaRosa]

Now.

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[Lauren LaRosa]

catch you on the flip side.

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Okay.

[Lauren LaRosa]

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[Lauren LaRosa]

We'll put the tweet on the screen. Read the tweet. Brandon, go ahead.

[Brandon]

Oh, shoot. You want people, you bring it up. I didn't have enough people to know

[Lauren LaRosa]

that I'm bald head so like they don't see me in my floor lie as shortcut.

[Brandon]

Okay, Shout out to the Big homie on Twitter. Somebody said, well, let me go to the original tweet.

[Lauren LaRosa]

So we did a segment at the Breakfast Club about Ben the Don, saying that Drake changed all his music because of him. And we, we were talking about this. Even if Ben the Don and Drake, that didn't happen with them. We were talking about it because Iceman still hasn't come out and been the Don be with Drake all the time. So.

[Brandon]

And somebody. So somebody tweeted they seen Benadon say on the stream. Say that on a stream, and they're using it for news. And the Don replied, whole time I was just yapping, Brian switching up because of me. And then Big, the big hobby said, that's Lauren Ball head ass. She looks for anything to try to start up some Drake slayer.

[Lauren LaRosa]

They be calling me a paid throat and everything.

[Brandon]

A paid what?

[Lauren LaRosa]

Throat.

[Brandon]

Like, hey, throat.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah, Like, I only voice certain opinions for certain sides, you know?

[Brandon]

What I do, though, means different things in different places. You gotta be specific. I haven't heard that term before. I'm sorry.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Oh, no, no, no, no. Not that. You know what I don't care about? I mean, what I do is once I see my mentions going crazy, it's certain people we talk about. I know my mansions go and go crazy when we do it. I'll tweet like my podcast episodes.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You know what I mean? Like, I'm like, since y' all here with my bald head ass, go look at something.

[Brandon]

Do they affect you? Because I feel like you are pretty good with at least jokes and slander and stuff.

[Lauren LaRosa]

I can't, like, with the random people and some of the stuff they be saying, I just be having to get off because it don't affect me. But I be a lot of times like, I'm like a progressed crash out. Like in real life. Like, I've grown a lot and I have a lot to lose. And I've been growing a lot for some years, but I'm not all the way reformed yet. So I don't even look at that stuff because I'm like, I will get on here and be going back and forth and I'm never going to see these people. You know what I mean? And in real life, I received so much love. Like, I. I've been through so much in real life that this phase of it, I don't even be tripping. I'll be like, all right, I saw what you said. If I ever see you in real life, I'll come up to you so we can have A real conversation. We'll see how you hold it down then.

[Brandon]

Yeah. I don't comment on people that feel away about the Internet slanting because I don't know what that feels like.

[Lauren LaRosa]

So it's crazy. Actually, you know what's crazy? And we're doing this in celebration. This episode in celebration of the one year of the Latest with Lauren LaRosa. Over 9 million downloads on the audio side. Later in the launch of our video on Lauren LaRosa TV on YouTube. Right. But when I first dropped the video for the podcast, it was so bad because we were, like, figuring it out and I was. Yo, I used to be so burnt out. I was saying yes to every job that would come my way when I first got back on Breakfast Club, because I was just trying to run it up.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Lauren LaRosa]

And I remember people were going on, like, these whole review campaigns about how bad I was and how bad I was as a personality, and I was tight, but I was more mad because I'm like, I'm never going to see these people, and I want to see them.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Was it anybody that matters?

[Lauren LaRosa]

No. No. But that's another thing. The people. It's never somebody that matters.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Lauren LaRosa]

The people that matter, even if you have a bad day, they see the talent, they see the. They see the work, they see the consistency. It's always the people who don't matter. Like, there is literally a. A section on YouTube for the old mad ladies who don't matter. Like, that's what they'd be on there doing in the rage bay people. So. But yeah, so let's get into it. Right? Speaking of things that matter, we're on the line with Lauren LaRosa talking about distancing yourself from. From family members. And we have a caller on the line today.

[Sophie]

Hi, I'm Sophie.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Okay, Sophie, where you from?

[Sophie]

New Jersey, born and raised.

[Brandon]

It's a big Jersey.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Okay, Jersey. So you heard the clip with Brandi, and you know she's talking about distancing herself from Ray J. Have you ever had to distance yourself from family members?

[Sophie]

Oh, 100%, for sure. I feel like it's pretty normal. I feel like there's more people who have to distance themselves from family versus not especially now, because I think either you might not share the same opinions as your family or, you know, they might be stricter and you might want to grow up and kind of spread your wings and do this, that and the other thing. And I think for me, I know some members of my family have made me feel more, less than. Than Somebody who can do this or can do that. And it's not that we hate our family. And I think that's what people always say, you must hate your family. Why do you hate your family when your father's done this or your mother's done this, or your aunts and uncles do this? It's not that I don't like my family or hate my family. It's just I need something different right now in my life. And I'm growing and I'm changing, and I don't think where I'm at. I need, like, somebody on my shoulder constantly telling me what to do or how to be and things like that. And I also think, again, like, you can have a great relationship, let's say, with your mom or your dad, but it's not always necessarily healthy. And I feel like for me, you know, not naming any names, I was in a very, like, unhealthy relationship, I think, with, you know, my biological father. And I don't really talk to him. And it's really hard to communicate with him just because, like, as a kid, there were moments I was put in situations that I shouldn't have been put in. And now that I'm older, I see it a little differently. And I'd like to keep my distance, though. Yeah. Even though I see it differently still. But I think it's best for me to kind of push that out of sight, out of mind, because I want to continue being my most ambitious, good, good to myself, but good to other people person. I think I just need myself for that. And I'm hyper independent. I like to think so.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You know what's crazy? I was thinking about, because at first I was going to ask you, you said, you know, sometimes it's like you need to feel greater than, not less than. And I was going to get into that with you at first. And then you brought up your dad. And I was thinking, I'm like. I mean, my situation with my dad is the same way. And he actually probably listening to this podcast because he watches and listens to everything that I do. So, I mean, if you're listening, hey, dad. But me and my dad are like, when we have a. We have. It's weird because when we do talk, we have such a great relationship because we are very like one in the same. Our temperament, our anger, like, everything. But it's when things fly off the handle. I feel like he takes it further than a father dealing with a daughter should take it. And I've learned to do the same thing, like I give him distance. And now this last go round, I've just been like, you know, I'm good. Like, I remember you said he was

[Brandon]

talking under your YouTube video, which is.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah, he was. I, the podcast listeners on the viewer side saw that. I actually screenshotted the comment. But he does little things like that. And I think what I've had to learn is that because I. You. You mentioned Sophie when you were younger, you know, with your dad. Mines wasn't even about when I was younger because my dad came in my life when. Well, back into my life when I was, like, 13. So at that point, you know, 13 years old, growing up in a neighborhood I grew up in. I'm like 16, 17, for real. So I didn't consider myself younger. But I do think that, you know, I've had to realize that there are certain things that, like, I watch. I watch other men with their daughters, and it doesn't matter how old their daughter is, that's still their baby girl. And I feel like with my dad, there are certain things that, like, he just disregards as I'm supposed to be your baby girl. There's certain things you should never say to me. You should never want me to accept that from a man. So you, as my father, shouldn't do it either. So I've had to put boundaries on the way that I interact with him. Like, every now and then, I used to, like, call happy Birthday, maybe Father's Day, whatever. But recently he can't. Like, I blocked him on my phone. He can reach out on, like, social media and stuff, but I just don't. And it's not because I don't love him. I. I have no hate in my heart towards my dad, but I just don't feel like the. I don't want to have to cuss him out because he's my dad, and I. And I don't want to have to do that. And I don't want to hear that from some. My dad. You're supposed to be my father. You know what I mean? So I feel your boundary, like, strong. And I understand what you mean when you say you don't hate them. Because my grandmother talks to me about my dad. Like, she always says, she'll be like, oh, call your dad. Like, whenever I'm heading to the south for an event or something. Mind you, I've called him before when I was heading there and didn't see him. But my grandmother always tries to remind me, like, you get one parent, one set of parents, period. And I'm Like, I understand that, but at the same time, I have to protect my, like, my. My, like, mental. Like, it'd be a lot going on. I don't have time for something. Sending him off the handle because I'm grown enough to tell. Tell him the truth now.

[Sophie]

Yeah, exactly. And I mean, we relate to each other. And I think it's really unique in the sense of, you know, I'm 23.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You're 32.

[Brandon]

Way older.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah, no, it's like I'm 34.

[Brandon]

Right.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You said way older. Brandon. What now?

[Brandon]

Let her. Let the color finish.

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[Lauren LaRosa]

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[Serving Pancakes Podcast Host]

On the Serving Pancakes podcast, conversations about volleyball go beyond the court.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Today we have a little best friend compatibility test.

[Serving Pancakes Podcast Host]

Okay, how long have we been best friends for? Since the day we met. As the League1 volleyball season heads towards its final stretch, there's no better time to tune in. We really are like yin and yang, vodka and tequila. You'll hear unfiltered analysis, behind the scenes stories and conversations with leaders making an impact across the sport. Today we have Logan the Necky. I feel like our fan base in general is very connected. Just like a comforting feeling getting to play at home. Whether you're following the final push of love season or just love the game, serving Pancakes brings you closer to the action and the people shaping the future of volleyball. Jordan Thompson had that microphone. Oh, God forbid we make mistakes or cuss at our coach like, one time or two times. Open your free iHeartradio app search serving Pancakes and listen. Now, this has been Serving Pancakes. And we'll catch you on the flip side. Okay?

[Lauren LaRosa]

Presented by Capital One, founding partner of I heart women's sports.

[Sophie]

All right, Sophie, but it's Interesting, like, where you're at in your life. And I'm gonna say, like, that's where I want to be, I think, when it comes to this relationship with my father, because right now, for me, it's almost like I can't even talk to him. I greet him. Nothing. Like, maybe, like, once or twice, like, in a year, like, I'll send, like, a text or he'll send a text or whatever. And I think it also, like, goes to the relationship I have with my sister. And my sister is my best friend, but we went into two fields. Two different. Completely. Completely different fields. I'm in film. She's a psychologist. She's at grad school. Yeah. You know, she does all these, like, crazy things. Always been super smart. And I think my whole life, I felt that. Well, when I was a kid, and I think a little bit now, I feel that my sister was always kind of,

[Lauren LaRosa]

like, propped up. Like, the good kid.

[Sophie]

The good kid, the older sister that knew what she was up to. I was the one that was, like, flying off the walls. And I kind of got this feeling sometimes that my dad had more of a relationship with my sister because she was the one that always was in the middle. She always had to solve things. So it was like, okay, well, if I have a great relationship with your sister, do you really matter? Almost that's how it felt for me. And I think sometimes I have to distance myself from my sister because I kind of. Even though that's my best friend, I tell her everything. You feel away? I feel away because I feel like little bit of the black sheep, especially in a family where, like, everybody went into business and finance and this and this. So I have to remove myself and remember that these people might not always know what I'm doing and what I'm up to, but that makes me happier than going to a family event and somebody going, what do you do again? Even though we've talked about it multiple times. Right. So those things make me want to, like, be in my own world.

[Lauren LaRosa]

You're the. You're the youngest of your siblings. Is it just you and your sister?

[Sophie]

So it's me and my sister. I have two older stepsisters.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Okay, got you. But you. So you're. Yeah. And that's. That's. It's crazy. I think this is the first year for me as an older sister where I even begin to take my brother's feeling like that into account. I always used to be like, yo, suck it up. Like, you should be lucky you have older. An older sister. Who is able and willing to help you and older people in your life. And now I notice certain things or the way people ask him questions about what he does or doesn't do and blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, I don't know. I just feel like even if a person doesn't have it all the way together, there are things that it just doesn't help. Like, everybody had to figure it out. I was just lucky enough that during my season of having to figure it out, I was able to mask it a little bit more. I didn't have a. I don't have kids. I was living all the way in la and it looked good. Like, oh, my God, you're in la. But, like, car was being repossessed. I was struggling. I was living on somebody's couch for a long time. Like, but people just thought it was so glamorous because you're trying to figure it out. It's. You know, it was. And I try to, you know, tell people the distance sometimes that, like, you might feel from a person when they choose to choose themselves, it's not even about you. Like, sometimes that person is locking in and kind of surrounding themselves with something that, like, blocks out the noise to the point where they can focus on where they need to get to. Because it's tough when you're in that phase of, like, figuring it out. I look at Ray J. And again, I have patience for him sometimes. Some of the stuff I'm like, boy, what are you talking about? But I look at him and I'm like, he's a person that has figured it out in his own way. And I think he's still figuring it out a bit. He's just so old now that people are like, why? But you have to look at what he comes from. Like, Brandy is literally called the vocal bible. How do you match up to that? But why also, why should you have to. Yeah, but. But that's how it goes, though, with siblings. And I think it's also tough, too, because it's playing out in front of the world. Like, she's Brandy. He's also a celebrity. Ray J is like, also a huge name, celebrity wise, even though he's not Brandy. So everything they do, whether together or separate, is so amplified because we grew up with both of them in our households forever, and they both run their own lanes of entertainment. So that. That's tough.

[Brandon]

But, yeah, another thing, Sophie, I'm. I'm low key, the black sheep too. But I don't think you should distance yourself from your Sister, you know, I mean, don't let that interfere with, like, the love you have for each other, because me and my siblings are, like, super close. They all, like, are really successful in their own industries as well. But, I mean, we're really close. I was on the phone, my sister yesterday. I talk to my brother all the time. Like, I don't think you should let that outside energy affect that. And, like, even what you were saying, like, there's ways you can make it look good. You know, I send my mom the picture of me of Hattie LaBelle.

[Lauren LaRosa]

That.

[Brandon]

That bought me a few points.

[Lauren LaRosa]

That bought you a few. A few Christmases. But she won't ask you what you do again.

[Brandon]

Dang. Who's the Oprah's protege? The doctor?

[Lauren LaRosa]

Dr. Oz.

[Brandon]

Dr. Oz. My mom loves Dr. Oz. Like, they stop television people and stuff like that.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Wait, ain't Dr. Oz the one that support Trump now?

[Brandon]

She used to love him, but. So, like. But, like, just like, stuff like that could. You know, I don't know if that's good advice, but I don't know where to buy you some points or, like, I don't know. Or like. Or communicate more what you're doing. Like. Yeah, you know, I mean, I'm sure you like film pretty cool people. And, like, you know, I mean, maybe they'll understand. Maybe there's, like, a part of it they can relate to. Like. Or maybe you could kind of show them, you know, how to work cameras or, like, you know, I mean, there's. There's different ways you can, like, connect with them. So I don't think you should, you know, all the way distance yourself from them, because they don't understand. They're just. They're. They're older. They just don't. They just don't get it. In their time, there was nobody who could just make a living, just. I mean, unless you were a Hollywood director.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Brandon]

There's nobody that could just, on their own, start their own business of just filming people, you know, I mean, so. Yeah, and just, you know, just talking in front of a camera so they. They just. They're just not gonna get it.

[Lauren LaRosa]

True. True. And look, and I. If you have to distance yourself for what you need to do, distance yourself. Do it.

[Brandon]

Brandy's doing this yourself. Make sure you win. Just win. You know, I mean.

[Lauren LaRosa]

And pray. Yeah, and pray. Because, you know, that can become lonely and that can become cold, and it can be. Especially if you grew up differently. Right. Because that's another thing, too. Sometimes it's like growing Apart from family or people you're supposed to have unconditional love from. It's tough, but sometimes it's needed for growth. So, you know, we appreciate you for calling in and sharing your story. Our love is with you. Our support. Support is with you. And thank you for being a listener. Thank you for being one of the low riders, girl.

[Sophie]

Of course. Thank you guys.

[Lauren LaRosa]

Yes. All right, y'. All. So this has been another episode of the Latest with Lauren LaRosa, the podcast we are here. I mean, we'll do these segments more and more and more. If you guys are interested in being one of the callers on the podcast when we do on the line with Lauren the Rosa, please email us at info [e-mail] Again if you want to call in, get a topic and talk to us. We'll be doing these periodically and we need people to choose from. Infoowngirlgrinding.com My lowriders. I tell you guys, every single episode, y' all could be anywhere with any old body talking about all of these things. If y' all choose to be right here with me, I appreciate y'.

[Sophie]

All.

[Lauren LaRosa]

I'll catch you in my next one.

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[Lauren LaRosa]

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[Lauren LaRosa]

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league anyways.

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