The Lazy Genius Podcast: Episode #413 - Office Hours

Host: Kendra Adachi, The Lazy Genius
Release Date: April 14, 2025
Description: Kendra Adachi blends systematized organization with compassionate permission-giving to help listeners focus on what truly matters while being "lazy" about the rest.

Introduction to Office Hours

In Episode #413, titled "Office Hours," Kendra Adachi dedicates the episode to answering listener-submitted questions, offering tailored Lazy Genius solutions to a variety of everyday challenges. This format, conducted quarterly, allows Kendra to directly address the concerns and curiosities of her audience, fostering a sense of community and shared experience.

General Insights on Problem-Solving

Kendra emphasizes two key principles:

1. Empowerment Through Questions:
   “You do not necessarily need me or anyone else to solve your problems. Asking the question might just do the trick because you are smart and you know your life better than anyone does.” (04:20)
   Kendra highlights that formulating a problem as a question can often lead to self-discovery and personal solutions, reinforcing the listener's innate ability to manage their own lives.

2. Shared Experiences Alleviate Isolation:
   “Hearing what other people are experiencing is wildly helpful in contextualizing our own lives.” (07:15)
   By sharing stories, such as her experience speaking to Senate Moms, Kendra illustrates that feeling overwhelmed is a common human experience, thereby reducing feelings of isolation among listeners.

Listener Questions and Lazy Genius Solutions

1. Prioritizing Self to Combat Burnout

Question from Melissa Marie:
"It seems like the world moves so fast. I try to prioritize myself and rest, but I still feel like I have a cycle of feeling burnout. How can I, lazy genius, say no to more to leave more margin for myself and the things I care about?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Metabolize Your Stress:
  “We often pay attention to the stressors rather than the stress.” (09:10)
  Kendra recommends focusing on daily practices that help release built-up stress, such as mindfulness and relaxation techniques, as emphasized in the book Burnout by the Nagoski sisters.

• Understand What Matters:
  “Every single thing that matters to you comes at the cost of something that matters less.” (12:45)
  She advises listeners to clearly define their priorities, accepting that saying no to one thing allows space for what truly matters, thereby preventing burnout.

2. Connecting with a Spouse Without Wasting Time on TV

Question from Becky Fowler:
"I'm trying to spend time and connect with my husband after our son goes to bed, but I'm also wanting to use that time for hobbies or tasks that need fun. Connection is important, but sitting in front of the TV seems like a waste of time, which is my husband's go-to after dinner."

Kendra’s Response:

• Create Varied Evening Routines:
  Drawing from her own relationship, Kendra suggests alternating evenings between shared activities and individual hobbies. For instance, “There are evenings where he's watching something and I'm painting, or I read with earbuds while he's on TV.” (16:50)

• Ensure Quality Companionship:
  Emphasizing that being together doesn't always require simultaneous activities, Kendra encourages finding harmony in shared silence or parallel activities that respect each other’s preferences.

3. Managing the Laundry of Hand-Knit Socks

Question from Kate (4 Present Joys):
"Washing hand-knit socks feels overwhelming due to the intricate process and limited space in our small apartment. How can I lazy genius this task?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Designate a "Sock Day":
  “Declare it Sock Day. Make the main activity of the day tend to the socks,” (20:10)
  Kendra advises allocating a specific day to handle sock washing, simplifying the process by reducing daily clutter and integrating it into a fun, cherished routine with her toddler.

• Streamline the Process:
  Suggestions include using designated containers for soaking and drying, and incorporating playful activities to make the chore enjoyable, thereby reducing the perceived burden.

4. Overwhelmed by Possessions Before Moving In

Question from Sue Bay:
"After my husband died 20 years ago, I moved to a new city and into a condo to be near my daughter and her family. Now, at 81, I'm overwhelmed sorting through my possessions. It feels like I'm preparing for death while still alive. Do you have any thoughts?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Honor the Season of Life:
  Kendra encourages embracing this transitional phase with compassion, suggesting “Live in the season. Make decisions based on what you need now, not what you normally do.” (25:30)

• Utilize Donation Over Yard Sales:
  Instead of the exhausting yard sale idea, she recommends donating items to meaningful causes, such as organizations supporting women fleeing domestic violence or helping foster children, which provides a sense of purpose and ease in letting go.

Parenting-Specific Questions

1. Playing with Kids

Question from Anna Engelmeier:
"I naturally lack the urge and know-how to play with my kids. With summer coming up, how can I lazy genius my way to playing with them for joy and fulfillment?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Redefine Play as Connection:
  “Connection can happen without play and pretend.” (30:00)
  Kendra suggests focusing on activities that foster connection without the pressure of traditional play, such as drawing together, sidewalk chalk activities, or collaborating on simple projects like building a fairy house.

• Incorporate Play into Everyday Tasks:
  Integrating playful elements into daily routines, like painting with challenges or interactive games during chores, can make interactions more enjoyable and less forced.

2. Handling a Child’s Reluctance to Participate in Activities

Question from Kaylin Rine:
"My child, almost 6, does an activity for 30 minutes twice a week before we leave. He whines about not wanting to go and loses interest midway. Do we try again in a few years or keep pushing?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Balance Resilience and Respect:
  Depending on your family's priority on resilience, decide whether to encourage persistence or honor the child's changing interests. Kendra shares her experience with her daughter quitting Taekwondo, emphasizing personal growth over rigid commitment.

• Decision-Making Flexibility:
  Encouraging children to make small, manageable decisions about their participation can empower them and respect their autonomy, fostering a healthier relationship with commitments.

3. Simplifying the Process of Buying Birthday Presents for Kids’ Friends

Question from Brooke Epps:
"Buying birthday presents for our kids' friends is exhausting. I want my kids to learn to be good gift-givers by noticing what their friends like, but the constant trips to the store are draining. Should I batch buy or let them choose individually?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Decide Once, Then Let Kids Choose:
  “Decide once on a category of gift, then let your kid pick within that category.” (35:45)
  For example, select a category like board games or snacks, and allow your child to choose the specific item, balancing ease with personal touch.

• Utilize Online Shopping:
  If avoiding store trips is a priority, opt for online orders within predefined categories, simplifying the process while still involving your child in the selection.

4. Navigating a Summer Pregnancy

Question from Taylor Lamond Rights:
"I'm due in September and the upcoming summer feels daunting at six to nine months pregnant. How can I lazy genius this season to stay comfortable?"

Kendra’s Response:

• Adapt to Seasonal Needs:
  “Make decisions for this particular summer based on what you need, not how you normally live your summer.” (40:20)
  Suggestions include using portable fans, scheduling outdoor activities during cooler times, modifying hairstyles for comfort, and incorporating more cold beverages like smoothies to stay hydrated and cool.

• Embrace Temporary Adjustments:
  Kendra encourages making temporary changes to routines and environments to accommodate the unique challenges of a summer pregnancy, ensuring comfort without permanent lifestyle alterations.

Conclusion

In this Office Hours episode, Kendra Adachi adeptly addresses a wide range of listener questions, offering practical and compassionate Lazy Genius solutions. From personal burnout and relationship dynamics to niche household tasks and parenting dilemmas, Kendra's insights empower listeners to navigate their challenges with ease and intentionality. By fostering a sense of community and shared experience, she reinforces the core Lazy Genius philosophy: focus on what matters, and let go of the rest.

“Be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't.” (35:02)

Notable Quotes

• On Empowerment Through Questions:
  “You do not necessarily need me or anyone else to solve your problems. Asking the question might just do the trick because you are smart and you know your life better than anyone does.” — Kendra Adachi (04:20)

• On Shared Experiences:
  “Hearing what other people are experiencing is wildly helpful in contextualizing our own lives.” — Kendra Adachi (07:15)

• On Prioritizing What Matters:
  “Every single thing that matters to you comes at the cost of something that matters less.” — Kendra Adachi (12:45)

• On Connection Without Traditional Play:
  “Connection can happen without play and pretend.” — Kendra Adachi (30:00)

This comprehensive summary encapsulates the essence of Episode #413, providing valuable insights and actionable advice for listeners seeking to apply Lazy Genius principles in their daily lives.