How One Mother Turned Her Son's Autism Into Hope

Summary

Episode Summary: "How One Mother Turned Her Son's Autism Into Hope"

Podcast: Living Your Legacy
Host: Jay Slangan (guest-hosting for Rudy Mawer)
Guest: Matilda ("Tilda") Tartt
Date: July 28, 2026

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Episode Theme & Purpose

This episode centers on the remarkable journey of Matilda Tartt — a mother, author, cognitive specialist, and founder of Blue Butterfly Writing LLC — as she transforms the challenges of raising a neurodiverse child into advocacy, community-building, and practical tools for families. Listeners gain an intimate look at the realities of autism diagnosis and parenting, as well as Tilda’s mission to empower special needs families through literature, cognitive tools, and accessible support.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Recognizing the Signs and Early Parenting Challenges

• Tilda’s Story: Her younger son displayed atypical behaviors from a young age (sensory issues, hiding, smiling at inappropriate times). Despite a 25-year-old neurotypical daughter, her instincts told her something was different.
  • Quote: “As a parent, you just know that something’s off.” (05:08)
• Barriers to Diagnosis: Tilda describes the difficulty and expense of finding answers, including doctors attributing issues to ‘behavioral problems’ and insurance failing to cover costly assessments.
  • “...they don’t tell you that the insurance doesn’t cover any of this. So a lot of it is paying out of pocket to figure out what’s going on with your kid.” (07:08)

The Journey to an Autism Diagnosis

• Catalyst: Daycare providers suggested looking into autism after her son was expelled from 15 daycares. Reading about Asperger’s Syndrome was a revelation.
  • Quote: “We read the article and it was our kid. Right. And we were like, classic our son. And we just couldn’t believe it.” (06:40)
• Overlapping Diagnoses: Tilda highlights the complexity—her son has sensory processing issues, ADHD, dyslexia, and anxiety, which are not wholly explained by an autism diagnosis.
  • “With kids that are on the spectrum, they usually have multiple other disorders as well... those are all different diagnoses that are neurological conditions.” (12:09)

Building Support Where None Existed

• Lack of Community: Tilda notes there were few supportive communities for parents navigating similar struggles, inspiring her to build an ecosystem for resources and connection.
  • “What I’m doing is I’m trying to build that. Like, I don’t really see a whole lot of that... I’m the first in my niche to help try to bridge that gap.” (13:36)
• Mission Statement: Providing a one-stop resource for special-needs parents, consolidating hard-won knowledge and tools.
  • Quote: “I did all the hard work for them. There’s one central location that they can go to.” (31:08)

From Parent to Entrepreneur: Developing “Cognitive Tools”

• Terminology Matters: Developed sensory and behavioral products, but insisted they be called “cognitive tools” (not toys) so they’d be permitted in classrooms (IEP/504 compliant).
  • “...if you call them toys, they’re not allowed in the classroom... But if you call them a tool, which is what I coined them, it’s a cognitive tool.” (14:49)
• Examples:
  • Weighted pens and pencils for test-taking.
  • Relaxation tools — including a camouflage children’s fishing set (“Fishing is a cognitive tool,” 25:15).
  • Educational books that teach children about emotions and facial expressions, drawing on seven years of play therapy insights.
• Reimbursement: Tilda’s cognitive tools can be reimbursed by Medicaid Part B and for disabled veterans through the VA—she provides the necessary billing codes on her website.
  • “You can buy it from my website, go back to Medicaid and to the VA and get reimbursed for it.” (16:07)

“How Am I Feeling?”: Teaching Emotion Recognition

• Many neurodiverse children mask emotions or mimic adults. Tilda created materials to teach facial expressions and self-reporting.
  • “I had to teach my son the seven facial expressions because he didn’t know what the expressions were.” (08:18)
  • She condensed years of play therapy into accessible journal/workbook formats for parents and children. (28:58)

Medication and Holistic Approaches

• Honest Perspective: Tilda shares the difficult decision-making around medication—initial resistance, trying holistic interventions, and ultimately seeing her son thrive on a combination of medications (including medical grade CBD).
  • Quote (re: medicating her son): “It took a lot for me to do that because I didn’t want to medicate my child, but I had to. And when I did, I saw a change in him and I saw a light in my son that I had never seen before.” (19:26)
• Sleep Difficulties: Her son never goes into REM sleep—he’ll often stay awake three to four days straight—so tailored routines and sleep medication became necessary.
  • “My son never goes into REM sleep... I’d recommend that you do that exam for your kid, because then you learn a lot about your child.” (21:56)

Restoring Hope: The Power of Advocacy and Community

• Vision for the Future: Tilda remains driven by her goal to empower and support as many families as possible, easing paths that were so difficult for her to navigate alone.
  • “What I’m most excited for is to help the special needs community and helping them understand how can you help your kid… my ecosystem is here, so that way they don’t have to do any of the hard work.” (30:47)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the power of community:

  • “Why don’t we build it and why don’t we create it, and why don’t we stick together and say, we’re here, we’re together.” (13:50)

• On masking and misunderstanding emotions:

  • “Kids on the spectrum, they don’t know… they mask their emotions and they smile and they laugh because that’s the only thing they know.” (08:24)

• On the courage to medicate:

  • “It doesn’t make me a bad parent. To give my son medication to help him function in society is just an aid to help him do better.” (20:40)

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Memorable Product/Resource Highlights

• Cognitive Tools Line:
  • Weighted pens and pencils (IEP/504 compliant)
  • Sensory-friendly, relaxation gear — including a child-sized fishing kit with matching bag and accessories
• Educational Books:
  • “The How Am I Feeling Journal”—teaches emotions, facial expressions, and daily self-awareness
  • “Poor Little Sunshine”—A guidebook for parents to identify symptoms, track notes, and navigate diagnoses

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Important Timestamps

• Discovery & Diagnosis Journey: 00:00–07:46, 10:08, 12:09
• Community Building & Resource Creation: 13:36–14:45, 30:47
• Development of Cognitive Tools: 14:45–16:44, 25:02–28:58
• Insights on Medication & Sleep Issues: 17:07–24:53
• Teaching Emotional Awareness (Books): 28:58–30:16
• Advice & Closing Message: 30:47–31:21

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Episode Takeaways

• For Parents: You are not alone; the path is difficult but resources and community do exist—and now are growing thanks to driven advocates like Tilda.
• For Educators & Community Members: “Cognitive tools” and the right language make inclusivity possible in classrooms.
• For All Listeners: A vivid window into the challenges and ingenuity required to raise—and empower—neurodiverse children.

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Connect with Matilda (“Tilda”) Tartt and Blue Butterfly Writing:
Visit her Shopify website for resources, cognitive tools, and more.

Host sign-off:
Jay Slangan rounds out the episode celebrating Tilda’s vibrant spirit, advocacy, and the practical hope she offers families nationwide.

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Transcript

[A]

My son had issues with his ears. Come to find out, when I put the tea kettle on, he would scream and yell he needed blue lenses because the lights were too bright for him. For years, I stopped taking him places. I wouldn't even take him anywhere. How do you get your kid diagnosed? Like, how do you figure out what are the next steps? So then it's like, okay, now you bring your kid to a doctor. How do you do that? So just because you read it on the Internet doesn't mean it exists. Right. So it's finding a neurologist and now you get them tested for it. They don't tell you how expensive this stuff is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They don't tell you that the insurance doesn't cover any of this. So a lot of it is paying out of pocket to figure out what's going on with your kid. So I built my business and my brand based on me figuring out what happened to my kid and what's going on with him. Because no one told you this stuff.

[B]

Matilda Tartt is a pioneering, resilient and purpose driven author, cognitive specialist, and the founder of Blue Butterfly Writing llc. Drawing from her military background and personal journey with autism, she creates specialized tools and literature to empower the neurodiverse community, building a foundation of true inclusion, advocacy and lasting empowerment.

[A]

What I'm most excited for is to help the special needs community and helping them understand how can you help your kid? Right. How can you help them do better and let them know that there's a community out there who's here to support them. And, and my ecosystem is here. So that way they don't have to do any of the hard work to discover where can I find resources for my kid. Yeah, I did all the hard work for them.

[B]

It spans the globe like a super high Internet. Elvis Preston I for free. Today, Apple is going to reinvent the phone. It's not over until I win. The Living youg Legacy podcast. For those who live to leave a legacy that's extraordinary. The impossible. Oh, that is sensational. Jordan Open Chicago. With the lead, Usain Paul is the fastest man on the planet. You can live your dream. Hi, and welcome back to another episode of Living your Legacy podcast. I'll be your host today, Jay Slangan in the beautiful World Cup. Ready Miami Beach. There's some craziness down at Ocean Drive. I was just there. They're all getting ready. The game's on. But we have a special guest here today that it's going to be a really important message for a lot of parents out There dealing with kids on the spectrum. Right. It's got a lot of cool products for us to check out and. Yeah. So let us know your name, where are you from and yeah, what's. What you got going?

[A]

Hi, I'm Tilda Tart. I'm an occupational tool specialist. I own Blue Butterfly Writing LLC and also Blue Butterfly Publications. I'm based out of Allen, Texas.

[B]

Okay. Blue butterflies. So I see you're all dressed in blue. Is that your brand color? That was all on purpose.

[A]

Yes, yes.

[B]

So what's the significance about the Blue Butterfly?

[A]

The significance behind Blue Butterfly is growing up as a kid. I love blue butterflies. Right, okay. And so when I was looking for the name of my company, I'm a techie, right. So I have over 28 years of IT experience.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[A]

And so when I was looking for names, they were all techie names. And all the names I kept looking for were all taken. And so I was like, well, what's going on here? I can't find a unique name that doesn't exist out there that someone doesn't have. Well, when you're thinking about technical names, they're all taken. So I said, well, let me take a step back and let me think of something that's so unique and so personal to me that maybe just doesn't exist. And so I just took a look back at my childhood and just thought about the things that I love as a kid. And so I loved blue butterflies as a kid. So I said, well, let me just go with Blue Butterfly and just add writing at the back, at the end of it, because I'm writing books, right? And so I add that on there and I was like, it doesn't exist. I'm like, boom, let's go with it.

[B]

Yeah. Honestly, like, growing, growing up, I had like, I believe, monarch, like orange and bright colored butterflies. And personally, I don't think I've seen a blue butterfly. She's got a Texas thing. You grew up in Texas?

[A]

I grew up in Louisiana, believe it or not. And so blue butterflies are actually pretty rare.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I would sit there and wait for the blue butterflies to come out. And so I just love butterflies because they were always out in Louisiana because, you know, it never really.

[B]

How can anyone hate butterflies? You know, the person that's like, oh, I can't stand them.

[A]

It's like, yeah, like, I hate a butterfly. You're like, okay, then they're not the person to hang out with. Right. Because if they don't like butterflies, it's like, what do you do? Then what do you like?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I can't be around you if you don't like butterflies.

[B]

I know, I know. So I like butterflies. Love your brand name.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

And yeah, so you have a son who I heard on, on the, on the spectrum, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So tell us a little, a little bit about that.

[A]

So my son, when he was growing up, he was just a little bit unique, right? So I have a 25 year old and I have a 12 year old.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And so around the age of three, I started to notice that he was a little bit different.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. So he would hide all the time. So I was thought he was playing hide and go seek. I was like, man, he plays hide and go seek like all the time. And he would smile all the time. So I always thought he was happy. And come to find out he wasn't happy all the time. He would smile when he was sad, when he was happy, when he was scared, when he was just doing things that were malicious. And that was just unique and different because having a 25 year old, she didn't have those same behaviors, right? And so I just knew that something was just different and unique with him. So I kept bringing him to doctors and they just kept saying like, oh, he's okay, he's just having behavioral issues. And so having a 25 year old, I was like, no, just like gut instinct. As a parent, you just know that something's off. Right? So he had a lot of sensory issues with like light and sound. He would run all the time. He would run out of traffic. He kept getting kicked out of daycare. So I was like, that's not normal. You know, he got kicked out of over 15 daycares like at the age of three. That's not normal.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, it's not funny.

[A]

Yeah, it's, it's not. Because when you're working full time and you're working over 50 hours a week and I'm, you know, I'm working in IT and I'm working in a skiff, right? So it's classified environment. So you don't find out that your kid got kicked out of daycare till 5 o'. Clock. So then your kids sitting in office all day long, right? And then they can't go to daycare tomorrow, so now you have to take a vacation day, you know. So I knew that something was just off with him. So then I started to get him tested. But more or less it was like a daycare provider who was like, hey, look, you know, you should check to See if your kid has autism. Like look into this and see if they're on the spectrum. And me and my ex husband were like, we'll look into this and see if this is our kid. And we read the article and it was our kid. Right. And we were like, classic our son. And we just couldn't believe it.

[B]

So mind opening, you know, it's just like, oh my God, now we have an answer. Exactly right.

[A]

But then now that you have an answer, what do you do with it? Right. So now how do you get your kid diagnosed? Like, how do you figure out what are the next steps? So then it's like, okay, now you bring your kid to a doctor. How do you do that? So just because you read it on the Internet doesn't mean it exists. Right. So it's finding a neurologist and now you get them tested for it. They don't tell you how expensive this stuff is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They don't tell you that the insurance doesn't cover any of this.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

So a lot of it is paying out of pocket to figure out what's going on with your kid. Getting them tested by a sociologist, Right? Yeah. So then it's all of these things that you have to do to figure out what's going on with your kid. So I built my business and my brand based on me figuring out what happened to my kid and what's going on with him. Because no one tells you this stuff. There's no books on it. I actually created the first books based on your kid being on the spectrum. Because nothing exists out there. Yeah, right. Because there's no guide on how do you figure out what's going on with your kid. You know, how do you figure out that they have sensory issues?

[B]

And there's so many parents that have this question also, you know, and it's almost like everyone's concerned when they're having a kid, you know that it just comes up, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So is. Let me, let me rewind back. You know, and you said that your kids always smiling, even during, you know, non smiling kind of emotional situations. So is that almost like, you know, some people kind of laugh when they're nervous, which isn't, you know, kind of like the go to reaction really when you're nervous, but it just kind of comes out, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I don't know, like it, it was just, it was just awkward for you.

[A]

Yes. So one of the things I discovered with my son, you have to remember your kids mimic you. Right. When your kids are born, they only do what they see their parents do. So as a child, my son would laugh because he would always see his parents laughing and smiling. That was the reaction that he knew. I had to teach my son the seven facial expressions because he didn't know what the expressions were. And so kids on the spectrum, they don't know. And so for a lot of kids who are going through these emotions, they don't know what the different emotions are. And a lot of the parents. Parents don't know. So a lot of times they mask their emotions and they smile and they laugh because that's the only thing they know. Like, if you go back and you watch the Joker. Right. The Joker used to laugh and smile all the time. Right. Is because he had Asperger's too. He didn't understand what was going on with him. He didn't realize he was really on the spectrum and he had special needs. He just knew that he had emotions that he couldn't control. Right. He was on medication. Once he got off the medication, then he started to kill people because he heard voices in his head. That's what happens with people who are on the spectrum who have special needs, who, when they stop taking their medications and when their body's erratic and they're out of control. Right. They don't know how to control their emotions. And that's the purpose of my books. Right. Is to help parents learn and understand and help them figure out with their kids at an early age, this is how we can mitigate this. This is how we can help our kids early on understand that there's a problem instead of waiting until they're adults to figure this out.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A lot of times parents don't figure out that the kids are on the spectrum, meaning Autism one. Right. Autism two is easier to detect. Autism one, like my son has. He has Asperger's. It's harder to detect. They usually don't detect it until they're the age of 13 to 15.

[B]

Oh, w. Right.

[A]

And it's because they're usually considered a behavioral problem. They're the ones who act up all the time. They're the ones who are screaming in the store. They're the ones hiding in the grocery store. They're the ones crawling underneath the table in the, you know, the restaurants. They're the ones who just scream and yell for no reason when you put the vacuum on. They're screaming. They're yelling. Come to find out, sensory issues. My son had issues with his ears. Come to find out, when I put the tea kettle on, he would scream and yell sensory issues with his ears. Department stores, Target, Victoria's Secret, scream and yell eye issues. He needed blue lenses because the lights were too bright for him. Okay, so he uses blue lenses, ears, sensory issues. I put on noise cancellation headphones for him. That way it muffles 95% of the sound.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That way he can function in society. For years, I stopped taking him places. I wouldn't even take him anywhere. I would go grocery shopping without him or at order on Amazon prime or have food delivered to my house because I could not take my son out in public.

[B]

Yeah. Because it was, what, a learning journey of just so. So much that you have to just be aware of. And then I'm sure that, you know, getting. Getting the. From the doctors. Right. Okay, look up Asperger's. And then you read that. That article, right? And you're like, oh, my God, that's our kid. And it just starts to open up. And now you're, you know, kind of looking at what's bothering him. I'm sure it's. It's just so, like, eye opening, but also just very like. It's gives you a sense of calmness that you now know what to be aware of. Like, because you're explaining things, they're like, oh, he was probably getting kicked out because he's yelling and screaming because the nursery is so loud, you know, and just kind of like things in the past will have little. Have new meaning, you know, and just open up and you're just like, oh, let's look back at all these things and see if it's, you know, reason. Yeah.

[A]

But what happens, too, is with that article, it only gives you a small subset of what's going on with your kid.

[B]

Right. Okay. Yeah.

[A]

What you don't realize is with kids that are on the spectrum, they usually have multiple other disorders as well. So, see, what I found out was that, okay, he has Asperger's, but there's also more to Asperger's than just him having it. Right. He has Asperger's, plus he has sensory issues. Right. So the sensory issues come into the ears and the nose and the throat. And then on top of that, he had adhd. He has dyslexia. He also has ADD as well. Those things are not covered under Asperger's. Those are all different diagnoses that are neurological conditions that my son has been diagnosed with that aren't part of the adhd. I mean, that aren't part of the Asperger syndrome. Yeah, those are different diagnoses. And so parents who have kids on the spectrum have to realize that it's not just one overall overarching thing. That's why I say my son is part of the spectrum, because it's more than just one spectrum. He falls under.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He falls under Autism 1, which is Asperger's. Then he falls into ADHD, which is part of being under the spectrum, which is part of the old mental retardation. Right. Then he has adhd. He has general mood disorder, during anxiety disorder. He has sensory issues. So it's a nose.

[B]

So are the. Are the communities of. I'm sure there's a lot of communities out there of parents. Right. Are they almost more helpful than the doctors because they can talk about what's going on?

[A]

I would say there's not a whole lot of communities out there. What I'm doing is I'm trying to build that. Like, I don't really see a whole lot of that. What I'm trying to do is I'm the first in my niche to help try to bridge that gap of what's not out there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And what I decided to do with my platform is because I'm the first in my niches, I'm helping to build that community and help to make that alive so that way parents can know, hey, there's a community of us out there. Why don't we build it and why don't we create it, and why don't we stick together and say, we're here, we're together. Why don't we form this to be able to say, why don't we support each other? Why don't we.

[B]

Because I'm sure it's so important to have a support, you know.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

A support crew or a community. Well, I'm sure that there's so many people that are joining this and so happy that you're taking, you know, the initiative to do all this for your son, for the community, for other parents. Right. So. Yeah. Besides kind of starting the community. Right. I heard that you've made a few toys. Right. And some. Some products. Tell us more about that.

[A]

So I created a cognitive tool line. They're not considered toys.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

For the masses. You know, they would look at them as toys, but I coined the term, the term cognitive tools, because if you call them toys, they're not allowed in the classroom. Right. Because we want them to be 504 and IEP compliant. So if you call them a toy, they're not allowed in daycare, and then they're not allowed in the school system. But if you call them a tool, which is what I coined them, it's a cognitive tool. They're a behavioral tool. They can utilize them in the classroom and in daycare. It helps the child to calm down. It helps them with their anxiety. It helps them to de stress. It helps them so that way they can function in society as well. So using the term cognitive tool, it helps them to function, calm down, and de stress.

[B]

It's kind of like normal dogs aren't let into the businesses, but service dogs are let in.

[A]

Exactly, exactly. So it's the same. It's the same thing. You just have to. It's a coin on terminology.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. So if you use the right terminology, then you are able to utilize that. So basically, like with the pins that I have on my line and with the pencils I have on my line, they're IEP and 504 compliant, so they can use them on standardized tests versus some other pens and other pencils. You can't use them on standardized tests. So it's all about what they are and what they stand for, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So it's all about verbiage. Just like with my cognitive tool line, I just wrote an article that's coming out where you can actually take my cognitive tools and you can get reimbursed for it on with Medicaid part B. And if you're a disabled veteran, you can get reimbursed through the VA as well. I put the codes for that in my article that's coming out. So you can go to the va, you can get reimbursed for that, and with Medicaid part B, you can use a very specific code for utilizing cognitive tools and be able to be reimbursed for it. So you can buy it from my website, go back to Medicaid and to the VA and get reimbursed for it.

[B]

Lovely.

[A]

So basically, you can buy it for free.

[B]

Perfect. Perfect.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

I mean, yeah, your son's here today, and he's been so well behaved, and he's looking fly. Right. Thank you, Mom. Mom. Keeping him looking good. And. But when you bring him here today and you have to leave him alone in the room. Right. And he's so well behaved. Are what are the things he's got that keeps him kind of cool, calm, collected.

[A]

So for my son today, to keep him cool is first off, he takes a lot of medication.

[B]

All right.

[A]

So in order for him to be here and to be calm, he's on seven different medications that he takes every Single day to keep him calm. One of them that he's on that he doesn't know that he's on is medical grade cbd. So he's on pure one to one ratio. He doesn't know that. He just know that he takes vials. And so a lot of parents are really concerned about putting their kids on medications on several Class 3 to Class 5 medications. All of them are Class 3 to Class 5 is what he's on. And so he takes them every single day. Now, he started off at the age of three on different medications and he's on multiple different types. But it helps him to function in society. And as a mother, I really didn't want him to be on medication. And so when you sit there and you struggle with your child and you try to get them to function in society and they have a hard time just trying to function in life and they struggle just to. Just to survive daily. They can't function in class, they can't sit still, they can't play with other things, you know, other kids, they terrorize classrooms, they hurt themselves, they hurt other people. As a parent, you got to take a step back and you have to say, what can I do as a parent to help my child be sane? Right.

[B]

And just be and be.

[A]

Because at that point, it's no longer about you. Yeah, it's about them. And my son's neurologist had told me six months prior to me putting him on medication, he said, look, you're a good mom. And he's like, you have to do what it takes for your son to function. He's like, you know, you've gone through a divorce and your son's tried to cope with things. And he's like, you have to understand that your son now has to function in society. He's hurting himself and others. You have to do something immediately so your son can function, so you can go to work. One of two things is going to happen. You're going to lose your job because you keep taking time off from work, because you keep taking vacation, because he keeps getting kicked out of daycare or he's going to hurt himself and you're not going to have a son anymore.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so I had to take a step back. And he's like, it doesn't hurt him or you for you to put him on medication. There are tons of kids out there. So he gave me pamphlets to read. He gave me different medication options for me to put my son on. And I took a lot of time to think about it, to Pray on it before I put him on meds, because I was like, I was going to try everything I could before I put him on medications. I did lots of holistic things. I changed his diet. I removed red dye out of his diet. I changed everything that he ate. I put him on everything holistic. A lot of it helped. Didn't help enough. And eventually I had to put him on meds and it was okay. And it took a lot for me to do that because I didn't want to medicate my child, but I had to. And when I did, I saw a change in him and I saw a light in my son that I had never seen before. And it was like he was a different kid. Like, I saw him the same way I saw my daughter. In a sense that he was almost quote, unquote, normal. Right. Where he can actually, like, function and he could, like, think where his brain wasn't.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. Where it was like he could actually articulate his words without him stuttering or being upset or without hitting his head on the wall or without hurting other people. And so I realized that it's okay for him to take medication, it's okay for him to have it, and that it doesn't make me a bad parent. To give my son medication to help him function in society is just an aid to help him do better. So all those parents that are out there who are wondering, do I put my kid on medication? Is it going to hurt them? Is it going to affect them in the future? All medications come with side effects.

[B]

Did you layer them? Like, try one by one to see, or you just took what the doctor prescribed him?

[A]

What I did was I read through what the doctor recommended and picked what I thought was best for him.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then over time, as he grows. Right. As your child grows, you have to change the medications because they may not work as well.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so over time, you need different medications.

[B]

That's very similar to my dad had Parkinson's disease. And it was the same way, you know, after a certain amount of time, some of them may not have the same effect as they used to.

[A]

And so like I said, now he's on 7, so he needs medication in the morning when he wakes up, and he needs medication to go to sleep because my son's brain never shuts off. So he did a brainwave test when he was about 4 years old. And so what the study shows is that my son, with Asperger's, his brain never goes to sleep. My son never goes into REM sleep. Never. And so he needs medication to actually put him to sleep. And even when he takes the medication, he never goes into REM sleep. And so in case you guys don't know what REM sleep is, REM sleep is when you actually go into deep sleep and you actually fall asleep and you actually dream. My son never goes into REM sleep. And so anyone who has a kid who's on the spectrum, I'd recommend that you do that exam for your kid, because then you learn a lot about your child and you learn about their sleep cycle. So my son, every three to four days, he doesn't actually go to sleep. So every three to four days, my son stays up 24 hours.

[B]

Whoa. Wow.

[A]

It teaches you about your child.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And what the neurologist taught me was when he doesn't sleep those every three days, just to allow him to be up in his room. And then he can watch gaming during that time just so he's resting. And then when his body's tired, then he'll go to sleep. And then that fourth day, he'll catch up and he'll go to sleep. But he needs the medication so his body can rest. And so what I had to realize as a mom is to take a step back because I was like, you have to go to sleep. And I was just like angry with him. And it's like, you have to go to sleep. And then I realized that I have to take it down a notch and be at his level. And that's what the sleep study came in to teach me, that his brain never sleeps. And I have to constantly remember that he never goes into REM sleep. So every three or four days, he will not go to sleep. And so I just notice, I keep a camera in his room and I just watch. He doesn't go to sleep. So I just tell him, okay, just rest, you know, you just need to lay down. You may not go to sleep, but you'll just rest for these hours. You just gonna lay down. You can watch gaming, you can do something. Because before he would just roam all over the house. Yeah, he can't roam all over the house because it's dangerous. He's taking medication, he can hurt himself, you know, because then he sleepwalks. So just have to, you know, keep that into consideration. When you have kids who are on class three narcotics, you know, even though he's not sleeping, his body's in that kind of zombie like state until he wakes up from the medication. Because what that medication does is it puts you in a zombie like state for like three, you know, three to like six to eight hours. So even though he's not sleeping, he's kind of like in a zombie mode. So whatever he's doing at that point in time, he doesn't remember.

[B]

You seem so knowledgeable, and it's almost like I was like, thank you for doing this. You know, I'm yet a parent, but I'm, you know, thinking of it. Right. And yeah, it's just great to know that you're doing this because, yeah, a lot of parents out there before, they have the kid after the kid, when they maybe start suspecting things. But anyways, let's see some of these cognitive tools that you got here for us.

[A]

So one of the things that I got on my line, which my son absolutely loves, right. Is fishing. I added this to my cognitive tool line because he had to have it. So believe it or not, fishing is a cognitive tool. So I actually got it in pink and I have it in blue.

[B]

It's a great, great bag. We got like a camouflage pink fishing pole bag, I believe.

[A]

I have it in pink and I have it in blue. Yes. So fishing is relaxation, and it is part of my cognitive tool line. And you can get reimbursed for it. So fishing causes you to relax. So this is a 63 inch, believe it or not, fishing rod. It comes in cool and it comes in blue, and it's camouflage, so it comes all the way out. So it's a whole fishing rod set. So it has everything that goes with it. So it's got all of your pieces to go fishing. Now, I'm not familiar with all the pieces, but it has the whole set in here. So it has everything that you need to go fishing. So it's got your reel, your rod, your. What's this stuff called?

[B]

The fishing line.

[A]

Fishing line. It comes with everything it comes with.

[B]

So this just keeps him calm during the day just to know that he's got it.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

He's not necessarily busting out in class the fishing pole. But. No, knowing that he's got it keeps him like. Okay.

[A]

Yes. So the great part about this is this is great for relaxation on the weekend.

[B]

And then also it looks amazing, by the way, the. The fishing pole has like pieces that match the bag. Yes. And yeah, it's nice.

[A]

So it matches. So the pink camouflage matches the pink and then the blue matches the blue. So it's all decked out and it has all the pieces that go with it. And so with the cognitive two line, you not only does it come with a Matching bag for it to store. But I also have a sitting bag to go with with it as well. So you actually have a sitting chair that you can buy with it. So I have a whole set that comes with this so you can get a sitting chair. And then there's a wraparound bag that you can buy for the kid as well that goes with this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then because the kid wants their own bag. Right. They don't want to put their stuff with yours. So you can put them a sandwich in there. It's. It's actually a six can bag. So you can put their fruits and vegetables in it. Because, you know, kids on the spectrum, you don't want them to have like a bunch of soda and stuff.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

So I give my kids sugar free drinks.

[B]

I think we should all be giving our kids sugar free drinks, you know? Yeah.

[A]

So. And he doesn't know the difference. Right. So I just buy it for him. He loves it. He doesn't know that it's sugar free. So you just give him sugar free drinks. Or you know, the little apple juices,

[B]

if you market to them that, hey, this is the good stuff.

[A]

Yeah. They don't know the difference. Or what I do is I give him water and then I buy the Welch's sugar free packets, you know, the little Kool Aid ones from the dollar Tree, and just put it in his water. He just thinks that he's drinking kool Aid and it's sugar free. And so you just give it to them. And then he's like, hey, I'm, you know, drinking sugar. Like they don't know the difference. It's sugar free. So they'll have that. So this is one of my books. So this is the poor Little sunshine. This is how am I feeling Journal. So with the how am I feeling Journal, this one actually goes through the facial expressions. So remember we talked about. I think we talked about this. My son didn't understand facial expressions. Right. So with this, this actually shows the facial expressions of how am I feeling? So I had to show my son the facial expressions. And so this has how is he feeling? And so it has the six facial expressions. How easy doing. And then he's the middle kid over here, which is Joy. And so the kid gets to write how they're feeling, and then they get to draw how they're feeling over here with the botanical garden. So one thing I discovered is with my son, after going through seven years of play therapy with him, one of the things they did was they would have me come in for One parent session once a month, and they would have him draw out his emotion and with that emotion, that would have me go over that emotion with him for the month. And so what I did was I took seven years of play therapy, put it in this book, and the two and a half years that I taught him facial expressions, put it in this book for parents so that way they can have it for their kids.

[B]

And in the community, other parents, they have that same issue of needing to teach their kids about the facial expressions.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Wow. Okay.

[A]

Yes. And so that's, that's one of the things I discovered.

[B]

It's a very cute book, by the way, everyone. Yeah. Very, very cute. And then you just go in here and you write your facial. Draw your facial expressions every day and. Yeah, great. It's fantastic.

[A]

Awesome. I did all of this.

[B]

Let's check out one more.

[A]

Okay. This is my first book, so I love the first book because this one actually explains to parents how they can figure out what's going on with their kid from beginning to end. This is my very first book. And so this one actually tells you from a kid's perspective, this is what's going on with them. And then it has the parents perspective on the left hand side of what they think the possible diagnosis is and then the type of specialist to go see and then they can write the notes of what's going on with the kid.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And so it kind of goes through that throughout the book.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And what I love is this actually lets you know from beginning to end different diagnoses for your kid. So even if your kid is not on the spectrum, you can go through this book and find different issues that you may have going on with your kid. And it's an easy read as well.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Great. Let me, let me check this out.

[A]

No worries.

[B]

Also very, very cute.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, there's just so much information. And thank you for helping. More information available to everyone. Everything's looking great. Really bright, really colorful. Also really cute characters. And I can see how this could be popular and very helpful. Really quickly. I like to ask everyone, what are you most excited for?

[A]

What I'm most excited for is to help the special needs community and helping them understand how can you help your kid? Right. How can you help them do better and let them know that there's a community out there who's here to support them. And my ecosystem is here, so that way they don't have to do any of the hard work to discover where can I find resources for my kid? Yeah, I did all the hard work for them. There's one central location that they can go to. They can go to my Shopify website. They can go to Blue Butterfly writing that. My shopify.com, and they can find all the resources in one central location.

[B]

Okay. Blue Butterfly, I'm sure. And you have your Shopify page, right? So, yeah, I mean, this is really actually important, not just for parents that have a child on the spectrum, but for all parents, really. I mean, just to understand what others are going through, you know, to help build the community and, like I said, just for everyone to understand. So, yeah, I can't wait to get into her episode. And a lot of good information in there. You are looking super fly. So if you want to. If you want to tune in, you know, to see what she's wearing, I mean, it's just incredible, right? She got the jewelry. She got the blue butterflies going. Blue hair, blue braids. The sun's looking fly, too. I mean, it's just fantastic. Thank you so much for coming here.

[A]

Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it. You guys were absolutely wonderful.

[B]

All right. All right. And thank you guys for tuning in. And tune in for the next episode. Cheers, guys.

[A]

Sam,