← Living Your Legacy
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A lot of people have been through trauma that can directly affect how they're able to communicate with others. And until we get down to where these breakdowns happen, you know, they might have communication difficulty their whole life.
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Renee Varduniotes is the visionary founder of.
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The Edge Academy, where she's redefining how teens and families build confidence, resilience and real life skills.
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With over two decades of experience as.
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A speech language pathologist, she combines her clinical expertise with mindset education to create lasting transformation.
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Transformation.
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Through her programs, speaking and books, Renee empowers individuals to overcome challenges and unlock their full potential with clarity and purpose. I provide a bridge between academic skills and real life skills.
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Most people don't ever want to take that and that's why they live this sub average life or life that they're not maybe fully fulfilled in.
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The most important part of it is.
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It spans the globe like a super high is called Internet. Elvis Presley. Today Apple is going to reinvent Lefon. It's not over until I win. The Living youg Legacy podcast. For those who live to leave a legacy that's extraordinary. The impossible has been. Oh, that is sensational. Jordan Open Chicago with the lead Usain Paul is the fastest man on the planet. You can live your dream foreign. Welcome back to another episode of Legacy Makers TV here with Renee. And we're going to dive into the world of communication and mindset and really how she specializes. Helping people communicate exactly what they're trying to do. A lot of people struggle with this as I've met a lot of amazing people, but I don't understand what they do. And you know, you specialize. Whether it's teenagers, young adults and all walks of life, you've helped hundreds of people. So excited to dive into today's episode. Well, you too.
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Thanks for having me.
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B
So let's, you know, communication, everyone's listening. It's like obviously a basic skill. I think entrepreneurs are generally good at it. That's what makes them good entrepreneurs. Most people aren't great at it. I've learned even after hiring tons of people, a lot of the time I'm like, what do you mean? Can you just break it down for me? Right. Why do so many people struggle with this?
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I think a lot of people are unsure of themselves.
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B
Okay.
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So that manifests in, you know, struggled communication skills. Because if you're not solid in who you are, you're. The way you communicate with others is not going to come across really that strongly. A lot of people have been through trauma that can directly affect how they're able to communicate with others. And until we get down to where these breakdowns happen, you know, they might have communication difficulty their whole life, but it's also awareness. Right. So becoming aware that you're not a good communicator and seeking out people, that can help you become a better, more effective communicator.
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B
And let's just, you know, to have, have everyone understand how you got into this. I know you've been doing this for 20 years, working with, you know, obviously in schools and stuff. How did you come across this and see it as such as a gap?
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Throughout my whole entire career, I've just, you know, really honed in on skills, you know, building up my kids, the students I worked with, their skill set with the communication based on whatever struggles they were having. Some children really would soar and be, you know, really good with meeting these communication goals that I set for them, but some would just be stuck and I couldn't figure out why. You know, with all the work and the techniques and the strategies and the book, you know, book kind of intervention that I learned, why was some of this not working? And it, it wasn't until I started integrating mindset work with my students that I saw leaps and bounds growth with their communication skills.
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B
Well, and it's fascinating. So you came from the academic route, teacher and stuff. Right. And you know, I, I don't know how it is here, but in England, you know, you do everything's around passing the next test, right? Yeah, the school, the schools are assessed based on how, which is a sad reality, but it is what it is. So, you know, the idea of mindset in a school, at least for me in England, is just most people in England don't even know what mindset and personal development is. Right. How did you start to integrate that and like, how are you doing it now?
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I have, I've gained so much knowledge in this space of just learning who I am even as a human that when I started learning these concepts about even growth, mindset, what. What is that? And when I started really learning and diving into it, I. It was like a light bulb went off in my head and I said to myself, why am I 41 years old learning these concepts now? Yeah, I went to school, I went to, you know, college, grad school, married, house, kids. I did all like that, what society called success. But I was feeling empty in a strange way. So when I was introduced to personal.
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Development, how did you start? Was there a book or so there.
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Was a phone call from a person who found me on LinkedIn. She really was saying things to me that I had never heard anyone talk about before. And it led me to invest in a program, you know, money I didn't have. But I said, this. I have. There is. This can't be it.
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B
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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This cannot be it.
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B
And you were teaching at the time?
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Yes, therapy. Full time. I. I've been doing that for so many years, but I. I often felt like I was meant for more. I didn't know what that looked like or how that would manifest in itself, but it was. It was just this nagging feeling. I've always felt like, I know I'm doing really well and right. By the students that are right in front of my face, but I know I can do more outside of this school, you know, because schools, they'll keep you where they want you.
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B
Yeah. I mean, it's. Everything's taught in a curriculum, right?
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Yeah. So when you have outside ideas or you're creative in your way, it's not really received that well.
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No, I've heard that for sure. Yeah.
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So for me, it was like this. This gut feeling that I. I felt like I had to pursue helping these students and even other kids around the world to learn these concepts.
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It kind of sounds like you, you know, you went down a bit of a rabbit hole and see this whole new world now. Right. It's like the Matrix almost, sort of.
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That's exactly what it is.
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Yeah. Yeah.
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And it's so funny because once you bust out of that nature, she can't go back.
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B
I was lucky because I. My parents weren't typical. They were pro athletes, so I never grew up in this normal environment. And I did, like, personal development books at 16. So I was always like. My whole life I've felt different and been different, and so I've never really, like, done that switch over like most people have. I was very fortunate, I think, born into it almost in this different world. I want to ask you, it must be frustrating seeing how the education system. Now you've seen this side of it, right?
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Yeah, it's really. It's really something that I try not to speak too much about because I know people will frown upon it. I'm kind of. I. I have both ends of the spectrum. Right. I worked in the school systems in New York and in Pennsylvania, and then now I'm not. I do work with students, but not full time in school. And when I hear about what they're learning, even my own children, what they're learning and what they're memorizing how is this going to help you in life?
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Well, I mean the problem with the political, any political system is I came from the health, you know, industry. I was a trainer and a nutritionist and a sports scientist. And it's pretty well known in the health world when they teach the food pyramid and what they teach there is it's pretty BS and very outdated. And it's research from 50 years ago. But then you learn like it's probably never going to change because if they change that, they have to change how they fund third world countries. Nutrition Pro. There's a lot that goes into it, Right. It's not as simple as like, hey, let's just change the guidelines, right? This, it becomes a whole political thing. And an education system I imagine is exactly the same. It's not this, you know, easy tweak and everyone answers to someone. Right. So if the school doesn't do well, the principal answers to the board and the governors and then. Yeah, so there's a big ripple effect. So I think change has to happen outside of these systems because of that. Yep.
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The bridge I call oftentimes what I do a bridge between what our kids are learning in the academic, you know, environment, which a lot of the concepts are great for them to know, but they're not going to help them excel in life. It's really a game of memorization, regurgitation, and then you get a score.
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B
Yeah, I think learning happens once you leave school. Right. Like in school you learn whatever, you know, some of the foundations of obviously maths and English spelling and reading. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But real life happens outside, you know, learning. Life happens once you finish.
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And Rudy, you're finding now that kids that are exiting school are more confused than ever.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Because they're, they think they're doing really well because they have good grades, but none of that applies to their life outside of that. So what I like to say is that I provide a bridge between academic skills and real life skills.
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And I do think the next 50 years will be a big change because like with the Internet and Covid in the last 10 years, entrepreneurship, like some millions of people are taking courses now and you know, learning how to sell online and starts, it's very different. Like the Internet I think has changed things, but change like a worldwide level takes decades. So like you see the effect of all of this because it's not necessarily like, you know, I'm an example. Right. Like I've grown with the Internet and created businesses, but my change effect will happen on my kids. So it's like one generation behind almost, I feel.
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Exactly. And first, for those who have no interest in personal development, this seems like Woo Woo buried us to them.
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Yeah.
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When it's really science.
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Yeah. But even personal development I think is more mainstream now. Like you've got like David Goggins books become New York Times bestsellers now. That's all mindset. Right. Tony Robbins, like a random person in the street starts to know who that is. You know, and even when I travel, like I travel so much, you'll be on a plane and some random person's got a personal development book. So it's slowly changing. But, but so I want to ask you, you know, when was the day you were like enough's enough. I'm. This is, I gotta go do this myself.
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It was when I resigned from my full time job in 2021.
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Before the day of resignation, there was a decision made.
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Oh yeah.
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Right. So what, why, what happened?
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I was going through Bob Proctor sticking into results program, six month intensive program. I met a friend, she was a former teacher and she, and I said, why are we not teaching this to our children? So we ended up. Long story short, she helped me, she guided me through the whole process of going through the terror barrier of, of leaving a really comfortable position that was, you know, I have kids. You know, it's, it's a two family home, a two parent home with double income and removing one completely. And my husband looking at me like I had five heads.
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B
Yeah.
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But you know, at the other, on the other side of it when I made that decision, which is really what it is, is making a decision which we're not taught either in school.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Once you set that parameter, there's no going back.
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Yeah. And I love that. And I think, you know what's interesting with that is everyone has the option to make a decision, but it's a big, normally a big risk. And I always say on the other side of risk and danger is success and greatness. But most people don't ever want to take that. And that's why they live this sub average life or life that they're not maybe fully fulfilled in. And that sounds like it could have been you for a while. Right.
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Like, and it was just feeling, not wanting to go to work.
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B
Yeah.
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And not that I didn't love what I was doing, but there was something pulling me away from it.
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Yeah.
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And it ended up being really hard.
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Well, when I've learned, I, I've known quite a few teachers and a lot of them love it. Or they used to love it. And then, I mean, especially in the last 10, 15 years, a lot changed too. It was more about the grades, about the statistics. Right.
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And they introduce new programs every year. So once, once the teachers and the students get used to one program, boom, it changes and it not doesn't necessarily make any sense to do that.
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Yeah, yeah.
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You know, the way our kids are learning is not how I learned. So I can't even help my kids with their homework.
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Yeah, I've heard that too. It's very different. Yeah. It changes so much.
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Yeah. And it just, it seems like instead of utilizing their, their funds from the government towards new programs and throwing out old ones, let's invest in some bigger and better things that are going to help our kids with their lives.
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Yeah. Let's talk about what you do now. Right. So it talks a lot about leading up to this and the school system, but how are you helping hundreds of people now? And I know it's not just students, so, but let's start with maybe the, the, you know, teenagers, students, young adults. How are you helping them?
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So my whole purpose is to raise their awareness as to what's possible. We come from a long line of generations of people in our families. We usually follow the paradigm that has been passed down that the daily habits. Right. You notice that there are certain things about your, your family that maybe only your family does. And you bring it down to, you know, your life. It's making the decision to. If that's not aligning with you as a person is. It's okay to change. It's okay to be. I call myself the rainbow glitter sheep of my family, where I always felt different. I always wanted a bigger life, better life. I had a great childhood, but it was, it was not my vision to just go through the motions the way.
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Another rest of your family still. Oh, they have.
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They don't understand what I'm doing.
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Interesting. Interesting.
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They support it too, as much as they can.
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Yeah. Yeah.
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But I don't even have conversations about it because I keep switching so much that. And they're very like, oh, but what you just said, you did this before. I said, yeah, but now that changed.
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Yeah.
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So. And so I surround myself with mentors and, and masterminds and community of people that are complete strangers really.
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Well, I mean, in my world it's very normal. I see a friend, see them a year later in a new event or two years later, and they're on a whole new business. And that's just how we are, you know, I don't even blink at it. Three or four companies and I'm only 33, whereas. Yeah, I guess. And I've not been in the normal world for many years or my whole life really. But I guess they stay in a job for 20 years. So it's, it's.
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Well, so for us as educators, it's the, the dangling carrot of the retirement and the pension.
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Yeah.
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That keeps people in, whether or not they're happy.
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Yeah.
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And I was finding myself a part of that.
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And especially in government jobs.
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Absolutely.
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Right. Is. It's like once you get to 20 years, you get this.
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Right. And then, so what, you work for 40 years in order to live the last years of your life to enjoy it.
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Yeah. Well, most retirements is, is barely enough to survive still. Right. It's not like you become a million. Like in entrepreneurship, if you're doing right, you should become a millionaire by the time you retire.
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Yes. And you don't have to wait till you're 60.
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B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 40, 30.
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Live your life now. And that's that. When that seed got planted in my mind, I couldn't stop thinking about it.
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B
Yeah. Okay.
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A
So that for me was a big move. My parents were understanding of it. But what are you going to do? What's going to happen? You know, they get like, fearful.
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B
Yeah. Well, they're worried about you. I always teach, you know, most of the time people around you don't support you because they're, they're not bad people. They're actually trying to protect you. But because they don't understand it, they can't. You know, they think it's dangerous and all these.
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Exactly. You're taking a risk. But all I do now is take risks.
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Yeah.
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Me being here is taking a risk. So for me, it's, it's, it's become so normalized for me to continue to change and try and figure this out and. But the most important part of it is surrounding myself with people who are doing the same things. Because I have groups of friends that do mindset and groups of friends that don't.
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B
Yeah.
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And I know how to behave with both sets. You know, I'm not going to sit there preaching about mindset to people who don't. Aren't interested.
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B
Yeah. You learn eventually it's like trying to preach, you know, politics to the other party. Right. It's just, you know, I, because I used to in my 20s, try and educate people, and then after a while you just like, it's not worth it.
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Yeah. In the beginning.
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B
Yeah.
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I was preaching it from the mountains. But people were, it was annoying people.
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B
Yeah, yeah. And it annoys you too, because then you're like, why don't I, don't you get.
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Yeah. It's, it's so true. And I really feel so deeply. Gosh. Convicted to do this.
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B
Yeah.
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Regardless of what people think.
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Well, and that's part of the legacy. So let's transition into that. You know, most people on this show and in this, you know, on a podcast here with me there, there's a bigger meaning. Right. And I, I think everyone follows mostly a trend of something happens to them so they learn something or fix something. They realize how many more people need this help and then they get set on this grandiose mission to impact the world. Right. It's like you could correlate most people that say, sit in this chair to that. Right. So what does that mean to you? The legacy and the impact in the world part?
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So legacy means to me kind of breaking generational curses and being the pioneer in that and the one that really had the strength to do that, which not many people can.
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B
Yeah.
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Or are willing to break. Generally generational. You know, so.
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So let's go a decade or two ahead. If you pull it all off and do what you want to do, how do you see millions of thousands or millions or tens of thousands being impacted through what you do?
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So I see centers all over the edge, all over the place where, you know, cultivating community of like minded individuals who want to get better.
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B
Yeah.
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That understand that we don't stop learning or getting better until we're no longer here. It doesn't just stop. It doesn't stop. So when you're, like I mentioned before, when you're in that community, you don't feel like the outlier. You feel like, oh my gosh, these are my people.
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B
And you see these centers as part of the education system or more for adults out of the education system, outside.
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Of the education system.
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B
Yeah.
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A
But that's not to say we don't have workshops, you know, assemblies in schools that try and introduce people to this, these types of concepts. If we're not happy within ourselves, we can't be happy with anybody if it's not within you. And that's what I tell my own children. You have to love you first because without that, you can't love anybody else.
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B
Yeah. Yeah.
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You have to take care of yourself first and you can't worry about what they're going to think about you. So I, I envision just a shift, a paradigm shift in education and what our kids are learning.
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B
Well, so let me ask you this maybe more controversial question. Do you see the education system changing? No, never. Why?
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I saw something about this once and it really hit me hard.
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Sure.
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So if you think about cars from 100 years ago and you look at our cars now, the change, I mean, they, they don't even look like a similar thing. The cell phone. Right. The phones went. The cord and all that. Now we have a computer in our pockets. But if you look at the at school classrooms from 100 years ago, they look the same.
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Yeah.
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Now.
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B
Yeah. Well, in some ways I think they bet they did PE back then. Now they don't even make people work out.
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A
They shortened their recess.
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B
Yeah. Yeah.
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A
My fifth grader goes to recess for 10 minutes. She's 11.
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B
Wow. It was like an hour when I was a kid. You were running for an hour, you.
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Know, and that is good for their health. You're not meant to sit in chairs all day. They have started really evolving with that, I have to say. But my son's 16. He doesn't even get to go outside at all during the day. I mean, even inmates in the jails get to go out.
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B
Yeah. I was running around playing soccer in soil, you know, and.
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A
And they pull away the snacks. What, because you're in high school, you don't need snacks.
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B
Okay.
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No. That fuels their brain. It just. To me, it's just, it's. It's a huge mountain to move.
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B
Yeah.
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To. To really penetrate an education system that is so archaic.
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B
And there's a lot of political about it. Right.
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A
Yes.
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B
Yeah.
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A
Yeah. And so I've made the decision that I'm not going to try and push my agenda on people who aren't interested in it.
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B
More on the private sector.
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A
Yes, absolutely.
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B
Well, it's the same in the health care. Right. Like a lot of you realize the healthcare system may never change. Interesting. Actually with rfk. Yeah. Maybe it will now. But a lot of it's established in the private sector. Right. New York Times bestsellers trying to educate or big, you know, weight loss programs and influencers. They're the ones that actually can create a lot of the change. And maybe it's the same for you. Right. You build a big enough audience and a big program. Right. And you can have that impact on. I know you focus on everyone, not just students. And, and. But maybe that can be a part of it.
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A
Yeah. I just want to help people.
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B
Yeah.
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A
Like, that is really the bottom line is leaving a legacy for my children, for my family, that I helped this Many people, you know, become awake up and become their best selves and. And feel good.
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B
Yeah.
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A
There's so much negativity.
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B
Yes.
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A
Everywhere.
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B
Well, I think it's. It's almost hot, like, you know, bringing up a child now I hear from friends that have kids and teenagers, because the Internet, like, at least in schools back then, you went to school and switched off. Right. Whereas now, like, you know, it follows you everywhere because the friends are in.
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WhatsApp groups, Facebook, and in your sleep, things are happening. Wake up to it.
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B
Interesting.
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A
It's not unsafe for our kids, I don't think, but I. If it becomes unsafe when a child is struggling.
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B
Well, and that's where the mindset part comes in. Right. Because if they're getting bullied, kids are making fun of them. I think through good parenting and coaching, one child can be trained, you know, coach. To handle that as well as they can as a kid, whereas another kid has no coaching. And that's where it can lead to depression and lifelong anxiety.
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Suicide.
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Suicide.
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I mean, it's awful. Just. That shouldn't even be an option.
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But it comes from the parent because the schools aren't teaching that. Right. It has to be from the past.
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A
Think about it, though, too. Our. So we're going through the same exact school system.
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B
Yeah. Yeah.
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So our parents didn't learn it. No, no, our parents didn't learn it. They just did the best they could.
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B
Yeah. Yeah. Right. Well, back in the day, too, it was more just having a. Toughen it up. Right.
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They're like, stop crying.
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B
Yeah. Yeah. But now it's worse because it's. It's more consistent too, with the Internet.
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A
Yeah, it is. But also the. The parent mentality of generations above. You know, don't cry. Be sure.
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B
Yeah, yeah.
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You know, you're basically telling your child that their emotions don't matter and that they should just suck it up.
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B
Yeah.
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And that just keeps getting bottled up inside of them.
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B
Yeah.
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The. They're not being accepted by their parent.
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B
Yeah.
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And it's. It's not no one's fault.
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B
And this is all the stuff you work on with the students and teenagers. Yeah.
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A
I mean, athletes, mindsets, everything. So I've worked with athletes on just, you know, improving their performance, their mental performance, you know, visualization and all the things that, you know of, you know, just setting their goals and not competing, creating, being their own selves. It's you against you. You know, outside doesn't matter. And the way you measure how you get better is by baselining yourself.
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B
Yep.
- [23:49]
A
Putting in the work and seeing where you come out on the other end. There's no statistics. There's no, oh, the standard score is, you know, compared to that of the population. Blah, blah, blah. No, no, no. It is you against you.
- [24:01]
B
Yeah. Yeah.
- [24:02]
A
How are you getting better every day? How are you contributing every day?
- [24:06]
B
Love it. So, last question. We could go all day, but I want to save. So I want to save some for the episode and all the other stuff. If people want to find you, they want to hear more about this, Read the books, you know, take a course, hire you. Where do they go?
- [24:21]
A
So email me@reneev.com or my website is being built right now. I've pivoted for the 40th time, I think. So that will be reneev.com love it.
- [24:33]
B
Social media.
- [24:35]
A
Renee Double Underscore. V E E is my Instagram handle, and that's really where I like to hang out.
- [24:41]
B
Cool. Well, there you have it. Check her out. Check out the full episode. Learn more about the backstory behind all of this too. And, of course, keep building a legacy. I'll see you guys soon.