← The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast
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- [00:01]
A
The Lonely island and Seth Meyers podcast show. Hey everybody. Welcome to the Seth Meyers and Lonely island podcast. And man, oh man, we're coming in hot today. Andy, I just want to say something. First of all, Yoram's not here. Yeah, Andy.
- [00:17]
B
Yeah.
- [00:18]
A
The last episode, you, unbeknownst to the rest of us host recorded a queen bee update.
- [00:25]
B
That's right.
- [00:25]
C
What? So I didn't listen to the final one. There's an Andy interruption.
- [00:30]
A
Yeah. Andy jumps in.
- [00:32]
C
When did it come in? At the, just in the middle of.
- [00:34]
A
The, like in the middle of my wrap up. And then it ends with him saying, suck it, Seth.
- [00:39]
C
Yeah.
- [00:39]
A
And then it comes back to me saying, hey, bud. Andy, I hope you feel better. It's like a real.
- [00:46]
C
That's right.
- [00:47]
A
It really makes you seem like a piece of shit.
- [00:49]
B
I feel like, fine, if you want to call me a piece of shit for that, fine. But in my world, there's two different realities, okay. One is real life where you value your friends and your loved ones and you care for them and you take the time to express that. And then the highly competitive world of spelling bee where you take no prisoners, you slit throats and you fucking go for broke.
- [01:12]
A
Well, don't let us forget to close this one, you know, with asking, wait, Andy, do you know what story is in the news that like multiple people have reached out to me on social media being like, oh my God, I hope Andy's going to be on the show. No. What have you heard about crotch gate?
- [01:29]
B
No. What's crotch gate?
- [01:30]
A
Ski jumping has been pushed into the spotlight after a whistleblower uncovered a cheating scandal that involves of all thing crotch manipulation. So it turns out, I guess there's something about the suits. All right, here we go. The Norwegians. It's of course the Norwegians.
- [01:47]
B
Norwegian.
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A
They found rules violations that initially went unnoticed during the competition. Stiffer non elastic thread had been sewn into the suits to pull down the crotch area during flight, increasing the surface area and creating more aerodynamic lift in a sport where inches can be the difference between meddling and missing the podium.
- [02:05]
B
So they're tucking.
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A
It seems like they're tucking.
- [02:07]
B
Yeah.
- [02:08]
A
But it does seem like, I mean, I think like we've established on our show that when there's sort of a wang related Olympic news.
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B
Yes.
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A
You're kind of our go to source.
- [02:16]
B
Kind of.
- [02:17]
A
I'm shocked.
- [02:18]
C
That's not legal. You, you wear a suit to be more aerodynamic and why wouldn't it be reinforced to push things down and make it slicker in that Area for the air to go by. Why not? They're regulating the kind of thread that your suit can use.
- [02:31]
A
A lot of stuff. It seems like a lot of the Scandinavian countries are behind all of this. Vermulin. This is. A previous scandal later described ski jumpers putting modeling clay in their underwear to lower their crotch to floor measurement by 5cm. Again, I can't even picture what that looks like. I need picks, right?
- [02:50]
C
Definitely.
- [02:51]
B
Or it didn't happen.
- [02:55]
C
Anyway, Seth, you look ridiculous. Will you smile for the camera and I'll take a picture that we can share and. Got it. Thank you so much.
- [03:03]
A
Yeah, I do look ridiculous. I was saying that I think I messed up my headphones a little bit. So when I wear the hat over the headphones, it keeps it in place better. I want to hear everything you guys are telling me.
- [03:14]
C
He's wearing a beanie on top of headphones. Big headphones over ear headphones.
- [03:18]
B
And in a pinch for Halloween, you can go as Parappa the rapper.
- [03:22]
C
Did he have a loose beanie or did he have a backwards baseball? I can't remember. You might be right.
- [03:26]
B
I can't remember.
- [03:28]
A
I have an incredible bit of information for you guys, courtesy of a writer on my show named Matt Golditch. Okay, listening to the discussion of 56 and Lennox, one thing that immediately registered with me as a Harlem resident is that Lenox Avenue is one of the main streets up here and that local residents often drop the one off the names of numbered streets. For instance, 118th street would be known colloquially as 18th. But since 156th street and Lenox Boulevard don't intersect, I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt that it was a Brooklyn reference. However, knowing that it came from Alicia Keys and she spent most of her childhood in Harlem, I am fairly confident that the 39th and Lennox in the song is 139th Street.
- [04:09]
C
139Th in Lenox. That makes more sense.
- [04:12]
A
Where there was once a famous soul food restaurant.
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B
This is the shit I like.
- [04:17]
A
Yes. And then somebody else wrote in. Alicia Keys is referencing the Pan Pan restaurant, a now closed legendary soul food diner that was on the corner of 135th and Lenox, aka Malcolm X Boulevard in Harlem.
- [04:29]
B
But is it where they shot the video?
- [04:31]
A
Great question.
- [04:32]
B
Yeah, I'm sure there's an answer.
- [04:34]
C
Just an update on Pau Rappa. The Rappa. He looks exactly like Seth. If you check the chat right now, not only is he wearing it over his black ears that look like your headphones, but it's orange with a little square. It's the same side by side it.
- [04:50]
A
Let's side by side it on our. On our IG stories.
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B
Hit us in the. Titus, you be the judge.
- [04:56]
A
Oh. The last thing I'll say is Matt Goldage said, I know I don't seem like the kind of guy who'd be an expert in Harlem geography, but I've attached a photo of myself for reference. And the photo was a picture of Brian Tucker, which made me laugh. I like that sometimes people who watch this, watch your shorts when they were kids are now in, like, you know, the workforce.
- [05:17]
B
Right.
- [05:18]
A
And some of them are in finance. Oh, I'm sorry. Real quick. Ash has something genuine to say real quick to Andy.
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C
Okay.
- [05:24]
A
And Akiva worked on it, too.
- [05:26]
D
I liked your commercial. Dad showed it to me.
- [05:30]
B
Thank you very much.
- [05:32]
D
Thank you very much.
- [05:34]
A
All right, thanks, guys.
- [05:35]
C
You know, Lauren often said a good super bowl commercials worth as much as a movie. Did he say that? When we used to work there, he would talk about how it can be a bigger deal than a movie, but I think that was back when there weren't a hundred of them and they weren't on the Internet, like two weeks before they aired. Yeah. So that it felt like an event when it happened.
- [05:52]
B
Right.
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C
Interesting.
- [05:53]
A
And now my hat's off. Look like a dork.
- [05:56]
B
I actually was just thinking, you look like a dork.
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C
Yeah.
- [05:59]
A
Hey, Andy, I do want to reference some shade that was thrown your way by a listener.
- [06:04]
B
Oh, man, not again.
- [06:06]
A
Said man. Sandberg won't even deign to read a podcast ad. But when Hellman's comes calling.
- [06:13]
C
Yeah, well, that's because he loves mayo so much.
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A
You get paid in mayo. That's the difference.
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B
I mean, if the podcast ads want to play Big bank, take Little bank with Hellmans.
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C
If Fiore wants to throw in some.
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A
Mayonnaise on the side, it's a great commercial. Did you direct it, Keith?
- [06:29]
C
No, no, no. Okay. I barely worked on it. I just. I just helped Andy record the song a little bit along with Mike Diva's brother, David.
- [06:35]
B
Yeah. Dave Dahlquist. It was directed by a director named Tom Koontz, who's awesome and has done a lot of really rad commercials and music videos and stuff.
- [06:44]
A
It's awesome.
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C
I kept Andy company on set for the first half of the day.
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B
He did keep me company at Canter's.
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C
Ate a couple snacks.
- [06:50]
A
It's very, very funny to me that all these years after I first met you, you're still doing, like, sandwich based comedy.
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B
It felt like kismet when the offer came in. Because I do love a sandwich.
- [07:04]
A
You love a sandw Love sandwich. As a comedy construct, it makes me smile.
- [07:11]
B
The premise and sound of the word sandwich, all of it is just like, yeah, sandwiches, they're fun. And, you know, we all had our fluffernutter phase when we were kids. Obviously.
- [07:20]
A
Of course. Obvs. Somebody just wrote in. And again, I like anytime there's a collection of words that have never been uttered before. You know, as we live in this AI future where the computers can come up with anything, I bet they'd never come up with two Burrito Brained to Bone Patrol. That was somebody's standalone.
- [07:39]
C
That's the way we beat the machines.
- [07:41]
A
Speaking of that, do you know what the Winter Soldier activation word in this week's spelling bee? Andy turns up a lot.
- [07:49]
B
In this week's or today's.
- [07:51]
A
Yeah, this week there was a word where even when I punched it in, I'm like, oh, we're getting Winter Soldier.
- [07:56]
B
Oh, no, I'm blanking.
- [07:58]
A
Mondo.
- [07:59]
B
Oh, mondo. Mondo butts. Damn it, they're after us.
- [08:03]
A
Somebody said this about Great day. This sketch came out when I was in college and was having the occasional cocaine weekend. And I would definitely put this on while cutting lines.
- [08:12]
B
Memories. And I'm like, aw, don't do drugs.
- [08:15]
C
But I love that.
- [08:17]
A
It is like somebody completely missing the point of the.
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C
It's also like the tempo changes and crazy singing. It's not like a good time party anthem. Like, musically.
- [08:30]
B
No. It's like, you know, watching Mad Men. You want to drink, even though you see it tearing their lives apart.
- [08:35]
A
It's true. It's true. Saying it's like a pro cocaine song is a little bit like Ronald Reagan using Born in the usa.
- [08:42]
B
I'm with you on that, by the way. The one that me and Keef like drinking to the most. You guessed it, Mank.
- [08:48]
A
The Mank movie. Mank.
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B
He's like, drinking himself to death. Me and Keith were texting each other. Watching Mank be like, being like, I.
- [08:55]
C
Gotta pour myself a big listen.
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B
Something about this mank is really making me wanna have a couple sippies.
- [09:01]
A
I mean, it is the truest thing in the world. I mean, I will say leaving Las Vegas doesn't want to make me have a drink. No, but I agree. Like, Mank where somebody is still being charming and everybody's like, you're drinking yourself to death. Mank. You're like, he's fine.
- [09:14]
C
Watching somebody with, like, a shopping cart at a Ralph's put a handle of the cheapest vodka in it doesn't like. It doesn't ring the same as watching, like, Deadwood and having them go into the bar and poor whiskeys.
- [09:27]
A
Yeah. Brown liquor over ice. I'm just like, yeah, no, they're fine.
- [09:30]
C
Yeah.
- [09:32]
A
Deadwood also came up because, you know, we've had Oliphant on the pod. We've talked about, obviously, Ian McShane and hot rod, and someone was saying they're rewatching Deadwood and it's very funny to see it through the lens of the.
- [09:45]
B
Lonely island, of us watching it and loving it.
- [09:47]
A
Well, we all loved it.
- [09:48]
C
Of just knowing that that's Rod Kimble's dad.
- [09:51]
B
Oh, I see.
- [09:51]
A
Yeah, everybody. I mean, that was a big show for us. I think genuinely as like also that that show is super funny.
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B
So funny.
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A
The funny part.
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B
I mean, the writing. The writing is so good.
- [10:01]
A
Yeah.
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C
I saw Yoram's movie. It's very good and very fun and he's good in it. Mr. Oliphant.
- [10:07]
A
Oh, I'm saying some people go into a different. Before my children interrupted, here's how, you know, people have grown up and some of them have gone from Lonely island fans into finance. Someone said about Great day. I probably watch this digital short once every fiscal quarter.
- [10:22]
C
That sounds responsible.
- [10:24]
A
It does sound responsible. Crossplay thoughts, Andy? Have you done Crossplay with anybody? It's a New York Times game.
- [10:30]
B
No, I'm not taking the bait on that.
- [10:32]
C
I see it. I always see it on there. But it's not just Scrabble, words with friends from afar type thing.
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B
I clicked on it once to see what it was because I'm always curious. And then it took me to, like a website to sign in for stuff. And I was like, bye. Yeah, I got enough on my plate.
- [10:48]
A
Hey, I forgot to go and look at this. But a couple of people said, asked I should say, why was a certain person on your fridge in Great day. Do you remember what, there's one football player in your fridge.
- [11:01]
B
Is there?
- [11:02]
C
Yeah, like a. Like a newspaper clipping or something.
- [11:05]
A
It's a photo of a bunch of people said it was Ryan Leaf. The first round bust of Diego Chargers. Yeah. Yeah.
- [11:12]
B
I have no memory of that and I'm sure it was set. Set folks did it or properties.
- [11:19]
A
It is kind of an interesting little detail about Dennis that he's also like holding out hope that Ryan Leaf. Yeah, it's Ryan Leaf. Unbelievable. I'm just looking at it now.
- [11:27]
B
He's just a big leaf head.
- [11:28]
C
But what kind of. What context is the photo on the fridge? Like like it was a newspaper clipping that someone hung up on.
- [11:33]
A
It's like an action photo. It like just kind of looks like. Like he cut it out of Sports Illustrated.
- [11:38]
C
I was like, dude, this is cool. All right, hold on.
- [11:41]
A
Yeah, it was him. We decided, are we doing a listener episode or do you guys want to talk about that summer?
- [11:46]
C
So, yeah, on the text thread today, when we realized Yorm couldn't make it. So it's the summer, so we forgot last week we should have said great day was the season finale of that great season finale.
- [11:55]
A
I think we knew because you were doing your sort of ode to May.
- [11:59]
C
Yes, well, sure. I can smell the lotus blossoms on cherry Lane. And we had talked about that the writers party was that week, which if people have paid attention, the writers party's always on the Thursday of the last show. Do they still do that tradition right now?
- [12:15]
A
Yeah, I think they do.
- [12:15]
C
Just would keep it alive.
- [12:16]
B
It is crazy to like just put that out there. Cause now everyone knows if you want to rob the writers offices, it's the last Thursday, the last show.
- [12:24]
C
They leave the interns there as security.
- [12:26]
A
And the writer's party used to be in the writers room. And then there was an incident my first year where it got so trashed that they had to off site it.
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B
Oh, yeah. I had heard only rumor of that.
- [12:37]
C
Anyway, so we were texting earlier and when we realized that yhorm couldn't make it. But we still wanted to do one today. Cause the three of us could. But it is. So it's the summer where MacGruber comes out, where we go back to the house in Encino where we did incredibad to start on what would become Turtleneck and Chain. And we should cover all that stuff. And it's very. It's. Yhorm's very involved with all of it. But, you know, it feels like another Q and A is not quite right. So why don't we.
- [13:05]
A
I have some questions about that summer then. Because part of it I was not present for. So first question is, what were the commercials you guys were talking about? Was that that summer that you were sending those out for?
- [13:15]
C
Yeah, the ones that I put in the text chain today.
- [13:16]
A
Yeah.
- [13:17]
C
So the first one we did was that Klondike ice cream bar asked us if we would make some web shorts for them. And me and yor more so were like, yeah, I think we can squeeze those into the corners of the summer and just figure out some little clips. But the real thing that sealed the deal was that they said they'd give us a lifetime supply of Klondike bars of every var variety.
- [13:43]
A
That's right.
- [13:43]
C
We were like, lifetime. That's a big deal. And by the way, they're in breach of contract for decades right now.
- [13:51]
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Haven't seen a clown dyke in October.
- [13:53]
A
Wait, when did it. When did. Did they actively turn the tap off?
- [13:56]
C
I. I feel like there was at one point where it was like we tried to get them and there was like none of the contacts even still worked through our management.
- [14:04]
A
Yeah.
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C
But we, I think, kept asking for them way more than they ever thought somebody would. Do you remember the fridge?
- [14:11]
B
Well, this is what I was. What I was going to say that we stay this like, crazy McMansion in the valley in LA.
- [14:17]
C
Same one.
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B
And it had a second fridge in the kitchen which we filled with only Klondike bars.
- [14:25]
C
It was the Klondike freezer for the whole summer.
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A
Flavors. Did you ever need to re up your Klondikes from the first filling?
- [14:34]
C
Yeah. Well, do you remember, Seth? I mean, I think you would have said it if you did, but the 17th floor had Klondikes for the next couple years. The fridge by the. Where the interns all sat.
- [14:44]
A
Yes, it did.
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C
Was full of Klondikes.
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B
But it was funny. Like, anyone who came to visit us at that house that summer would be like, hey, can I get you a drink? Klondike.
- [14:53]
C
It was like in a Dre and Snoop video when they opened the fridge and it's all 40s and like the. And the dry ice kind of pours out over the 40s and it's like, damn, this is crazy. But it's all.
- [15:04]
A
The whole fridge was a freezer?
- [15:06]
C
No, it's just a huge. One of those huge sub zero fridges where the freezer is sizable and was just very well organized. So it felt really just flexing. Like, grab as many as you like.
- [15:18]
A
And did you. I would assume you also got some money.
- [15:21]
C
Yeah, yeah. We didn't just do it generally, you know, they didn't throw in any mayo, so I'm shocked we did it at all. But there was a cash.
- [15:28]
B
They key them off the Klond brother.
- [15:30]
C
Yeah.
- [15:31]
A
Were you mad when you realized that you weren't getting any more Klondikes or did you kind of always assume that it was not.
- [15:37]
C
We had done it for enough years that like, even our manager was like, really? You're gonna ask them again? We're like, they said lifet.
- [15:46]
B
I remember being both. Seth is the truth. Like, we were definitely a little burnt on Klondike bars. But also, we were like. They said lifetime.
- [15:55]
A
Yeah.
- [15:56]
C
Even if we had just given them all away, they should have said five years. The fact that they said lifetime is so crazy.
- [16:02]
A
One of my favorite. So I don't remember a lot of jokes from improv scenes over the course of my life, but I remember Ian Roberts once doing a scene with Matt Walsh at UCB where Ian's character was not comfortable agreeing that they could use his likeness in perpetuity. And he goes, just. And it's. But that was in the contract. He's like, just say. Just say a million years. And they were like, well, that's what. They go. You'll be dead. So, like, it's just gonna be. He's like, I'm not comfortable that it's imperpent.
- [16:32]
C
But he was okay with a million years.
- [16:33]
A
He goes, put a. Put 2 million years. But, like, that's. I feel like the Klondike people had a chance. Exactly.
- [16:39]
C
To say five. They could have said it. Yeah.
- [16:40]
A
Don't say lifetime.
- [16:42]
C
I mean, technically, we could dig up that contract right now and go to Klondike and say, hey, like, let's get a shipment over. And they contractually have to give it to us.
- [16:50]
A
Would be an awesome.
- [16:51]
B
I actually am curious if that's true.
- [16:53]
C
We should. We should look that up for next week. We will definitely be able to find that. I think that contract, because we have the same lawyers we've had this whole time. It should be in a file somewhere if it's legit.
- [17:01]
B
Keef.
- [17:01]
C
Yeah.
- [17:02]
B
I mean, it'd be nice to have some Klondikes at the office, you know.
- [17:05]
C
Offer to our guests the amount we've already talked about it is worth whatever that.
- [17:09]
A
Yeah.
- [17:11]
C
They've already earned. We've already earned that shipment 10 times over.
- [17:15]
B
But is it, like a small shipment, or is it a shipment with one of every flavor?
- [17:19]
C
You know what I mean?
- [17:20]
B
One must.
- [17:20]
A
Yeah, one must wonder if your lawyers listen to this pod. I don't know if they do or not. Right now, they're like, f. That's true. Oh, this is coming up again.
- [17:31]
B
The weekend.
- [17:32]
A
Go to the Klondike files.
- [17:35]
E
Support comes from Bombas. Smooth Yorm here, guys. You know that people keep asking me about my 20, 26 resolutions. Ooh, get off my back, guys. And I have the usual goals. Sure. Read more. Hit the gym. Look like Jeremy Alan White's dad. Learn how to crochet, stop falling off of ladders. But this year, there's a new one at the top of my list and that is get foot comfy. Both feet, even the one that's numb from nerve pain from my accident. And that's where bombas come in because they are bringing seriously comfortable socks to all my everyday go tos. Seriously, I love bombas. I wear them all the time. They're cushioned where I need it most, right on my nerve damaged foot. And the other one too. They have sweat wicking which everyone knows that Me Jorma likes. And they're loaded with other tech features like radar guns and laser beams.
- [18:39]
A
Just kidding.
- [18:39]
E
It doesn't have those. All of their tech features are actually just to keep me comfy and locked in. Here's a list of places that I wear bombas. My living room. A bookstore called Books are Magic. Big up Brooklyn.
- [18:53]
C
Ooh.
- [18:53]
A
Ooh.
- [18:54]
E
They also have other items guys. Like the luxurious Sherpa Sunday slippers. Ooh, that feel like walking on clouds. Cumulus. I don't know the other names of any clouds. Ooh, they also have this one. The new squishy Saturday suede slip on shoe for comfort on the go. Keyword is comfort here guys, head over to bombas.com island and use promo code island for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O M B A S.com island code Island at checkout Support also for our lovely program comes from Good Chop. Good Chop delivers high quality American meat and seafood straight to your door, vacuum sealed and frozen at peak freshness. Who doesn't want that? You know what I ordered guys, because I'm a high class dude? The grass fed filet mignon.
- [19:55]
A
That's right.
- [19:57]
E
It was primo. They also have grass fed rib eye steaks and I pronounced that one correctly. Here's a true story. I cooked up that filet mignon and everyone I fed it to kept saying it's not pronounced that way. And I was like, does it taste good? And they said yes, it tastes amazing. So it comes out in the wash guys. Unlike many other companies, Good Chop sources its meat and seafood exclusively from American Farms and Fisheries. And as a hyper patriot, I approve of that. Good Chop sources only the good stuff, hence the name. Which is why they feel confident about their 100% money back guarantee. Love Good Chop or get your money back. Wawa we wah. As this other guy would say, go to goodchop.com podcast and use code 50 island to get $50 off plus free shipping on your first order. That's $50 off plus free shipping at goodchop.com podcast code 50 Island. It's all one word. And tell them that J Dog sent you.
- [21:12]
A
Hey, Keef. But how are you?
- [21:14]
C
I'm doing just fine, thank you.
- [21:15]
A
I have a dream, Keev. One day, I have a dream that our families go on vacation together.
- [21:19]
C
That would be very, very fun.
- [21:21]
A
I feel like my kids would love your kids. Yours are a little older, too.
- [21:24]
C
Yeah. But they like babysitting and they like hanging out with younger kids and showing them stuff and doing things and. Yeah, they'd have a blast.
- [21:30]
A
They got good vibes. One of your kids does magic tricks. I feel like that would be a real hit.
- [21:34]
C
Yeah, they are into all the stuff little kids are into. They would have a blast.
- [21:37]
A
But, you know, what I'd like to say is I don't want to do it at a hotel. You know what I mean?
- [21:42]
C
No, no. We need. We need the full experience. We need a pool in the backyard. Yeah.
- [21:46]
A
We need a table that's big enough for us to throw out. A big old jigsaw table. You know what I mean?
- [21:51]
C
I love a puzzle.
- [21:52]
A
A jigsaw table that would. You know what? Are we onto something? A table. You.
- [21:55]
C
3D puzzles are pretty cool. And one that at the end of it, you can eat dinner off of. Yeah.
- [21:59]
A
Well, look, Airbnb is a fantastic platform. I love staying in welcoming homes that I book on Airbnb. They offer us more privacy, more space, better locations. Also, check out the guest favorites, which are the most loved homes on Airbnb. That's where I like to stay. They're the highest rated homes. And, you know, when Keem and I take this vacation, we're going to have space to spend time without hanging out in the hotel lobby. We're going to have a place to cook and dine together.
- [22:21]
C
Kids can run around and do stuff, and we're not worried about other guests being annoyed by them.
- [22:26]
A
Not bad. Not bad to have all that.
- [22:28]
C
What's the destination, you're thinking?
- [22:31]
A
I think we should go Cambodia. I don't want to.
- [22:33]
C
No, go ahead.
- [22:34]
A
No, I think that was Cambodia.
- [22:35]
C
Okay, great.
- [22:36]
A
I was going to say someplace with no jet lag, but then you went so far away that I'm like, I think that might just line right up.
- [22:41]
C
Yep. It just goes around the horn. You just got to do it.
- [22:44]
A
Book a good trip on Airbnb makes for a better trip. You could be traveling with family, looking to discover authentic and local experience. Lifelock. How can I help? The IRS said I filed my return.
- [22:55]
E
But I haven't 1 in 4 taxpaying.
- [22:57]
C
Americans has paid the price of identity fraud.
- [22:59]
D
What do I do?
- [23:00]
C
My refund, though. I'm freaking out.
- [23:02]
A
Don't worry, I can fix this.
- [23:03]
E
LifeLock fixes identity theft, guaranteed, and gets.
- [23:06]
C
Your money back with up to $3 million in coverage. I'm so relieved.
- [23:10]
A
No problem. I'll be with you every step of the way.
- [23:12]
C
One in four was a fraud. Paying American. Not anymore.
- [23:16]
E
Save up to 40% your first year.
- [23:18]
C
Visit lifelock.com podcast terms apply okay, that was one ad. That was one of ads. The other one that I sent you that. I think we should watch some of these together, because I did not hit play on any. I just went and sourced them. Was. It's just, again, Jorm was very. The klondike is like 75% yorm.
- [23:37]
B
I mean, it's all, like, Sloth's vibes.
- [23:39]
C
Or I'd say creatively, it's all him and then it's me helping him. Yeah. And then the Rock Vodka is all of us. And that was Diageo, which is, like, the largest liquor company in the world that owns half of, you know, everything from Johnny Walker to, I don't know, Kettle one or whatever. And they came to us, and this was at the height of, like, the beginning of celebrities endorsing liquor brands. It's not like now where everybody has one, but they came to us. Diageo, this huge liquor brand, being like, hey, would you guys want. We have this new vodka we're going to launch that's like, at the level of, like, Sky Vodka. It's like a Swedish vodka like that. And would you guys want to be the, like, creative directors of the brand? And now I feel like nobody thinks about that type of thing as selling out or being whack. But it was still long enough ago that we had our, you know, we're not technically Gen X, but the Gen X ethos of, like, you don't do that shit. But we were right on the edge of it, and we could tell that there was something so funny that we would have our own liquor when we're making also fake pop albums, slash rap albums. So at first we immediately bristle, like, no, no, no, we're not doing stuff like that. And then we were like, this might be a real opportunity to kind of combine the fake characters of these guys that we are when we're doing our albums with. Because we were working. If we weren't working on the album, we wouldn't have done it. But we were just starting on the album and we were like, oh, this could Make a lot of sense. So we ended up doing some very polished ads, and we were able to even use some of the money from the shoot where we're like, they had Lamborghinis and stuff in front of a mansion to also be like, we, like, were straight up with them. We weren't sneaking. We were like, hey, since we're going to have a camera crew and all this cool stuff, can we also just shoot some, like, a few takes for a music video? And they were like, no, we love it. It's a partnership. Do it like. They were really.
- [25:27]
B
They were great.
- [25:28]
C
Nicely great about it. And it's in the We're Back video. Right. That we'll play, because it's the first song. So that's why. So when you watch this rock ad that we can watch, but then you watch the We're Back video, which was a video we made knowing it wouldn't be on snl. It's the first song on Turtleneck and Chain, but we just wanted to make it as kind of an announcement video on our YouTube of like, yo, there's a. This is our album. There are shots in the We're Back video that are clearly at the same place as the rock thing. And there were cases of rock vodka at SNL for the next two years as well. And if you remember the interns and people, like the assistants, we'd give them bottles all the time. So, like, Rachel Lynn, she should send us a voice note. Should we text her right now for a voice note about rock vodka?
- [26:12]
A
How did you spell rock vodka? R, O, K, K. And is it a round spell?
- [26:16]
C
Cause it's Swedish. It's like Viking stuff. No, it is no longer around.
- [26:20]
B
I remember how it spelled Seth because Keev was always like, Seems like it's missing a K, but okay.
- [26:27]
C
I see.
- [26:28]
B
Yeah.
- [26:30]
A
By the way, not to sideline it, but you guys know James Acaster.
- [26:35]
B
I love James Acaster.
- [26:36]
C
Yeah.
- [26:36]
A
James Acaster was just on my show, and it was one of the most batshit and wonderful 15 minutes of my life. Because he constantly does what you just did to Keev about me.
- [26:46]
B
Oh, yeah.
- [26:46]
A
Like, he just makes me a bad guy.
- [26:51]
B
I gotta watch it. I've never met him, but I'm a big fan.
- [26:54]
A
He's the best. And he made me laugh harder than anyone's ever made me laugh before because I did a live taskmaster with John Oliver in New York City.
- [27:03]
B
Brag.
- [27:04]
A
And James had been on the whole. He'd done an actual season. They asked you to do it? Yeah. Here in the States. I couldn't do it.
- [27:11]
C
I didn't want to do it. I didn't want to try. But you did great, by the way. Well done.
- [27:16]
A
You didn't see it, huh? No, I heard all about it.
- [27:18]
C
I did go and see it.
- [27:19]
A
I was in the audience.
- [27:20]
C
I've watched it and like, they were. I did.
- [27:22]
F
I saw it.
- [27:23]
C
It was really hardcore.
- [27:24]
A
The tasks that they do on the.
- [27:26]
C
Live one are way hardcore. Make a dog. Oh, man, it was so. I can't believe you could say that on tv.
- [27:38]
A
Shocking. I mean, you can't. We beeped. It should probably be here. It's fucking jarring. So, Rock Vodka. Can we watch a Rock Vodka?
- [27:47]
C
Yeah, let's.
- [27:47]
A
Can we watch a Klondike ad too?
- [27:49]
C
Yeah. I found them all online and I have not rewatched them, so I have not really seen these since we made them. But let's look at the Rock one first because it's has, you know, real production value and stuff. I had a wonderful dream of a place where luxury.
- [28:09]
A
Status.
- [28:14]
C
Desire.
- [28:19]
B
Oh, God. A Viking.
- [28:23]
F
Viking and a vodka.
- [28:27]
C
Vodka transcends space and time to a moment soon forgotten. This is my incredible dream. What's yours? Rock Vodka. It's not a dream.
- [28:59]
A
Sure I do. I want to explain real quick because not everybody's going to go and watch this ad, but it does. It feels like a normal vodka ad. Black and white, like sexy shots of. Of Yoram and Kee. Not like winking too much yet. You guys look handsome.
- [29:13]
C
Yeah, Like a cologne ad, honestly. Like a Calvin Klein.
- [29:16]
A
Then you're kind of Fabio Andy lying in the surf while water actually washes.
- [29:21]
B
Over you wearing jeans.
- [29:22]
A
Yeah. Then we see an actual Viking. He's eating a big old turkey leg. Then it's the three of you in a hot tub, kind of sexily with like flowy white shirts on, jumping around in a hot tub. And then the music cuts out and it cuts to a wide. And the Viking we saw earlier is just spraying you guys with a hose in a hot tub.
- [29:42]
C
Yeah, he's just up on a ladder. Yeah, it's beautifully shot.
- [29:45]
A
And then there's just like a smoke show. Swedish lady who at no point winks to the fact that this is crazy. Yeah, she's kind of narrating it.
- [29:52]
C
Yeah.
- [29:52]
A
Super fun. I love, I love, I love the people who worked for the ad agency who were okay with this. And it was 100% the wrong call.
- [30:04]
C
We weren't the only things. They also sponsored a bunch of nice, like GLAAD type events in New York City.
- [30:11]
A
Well, they're obviously like. They're vibes, right, Keith?
- [30:13]
B
Nice save.
- [30:13]
C
It was true. You can find the billboards online still. I know it was good. And I don't even know if there was an ad agency. I think it was just Diageo cut us a check, and then we just went off and made the ad.
- [30:24]
A
Diageo sounds like a guy. The name of a guy who would.
- [30:26]
C
Okay, this Mr. Diageo came by and he's like, this is fabulous, boys.
- [30:31]
A
They tell Diageo, I'm throwing my money away. That's not a Diagio.
- [30:35]
C
Things.
- [30:37]
B
Does Rock Vodka still exist? This whole episode of the Pot is just plugging products. I think.
- [30:42]
A
I know.
- [30:43]
C
I thought. I thought it was gone for sure. You think they just told us that, like, don't worry, guys. We're shutting down the whole vodka.
- [30:50]
A
Here's what I've got. Rock Vodka appears to have been discontinued or phased out shortly after its release.
- [30:56]
B
Yeah.
- [30:57]
C
Yeah. It did not.
- [30:58]
A
It did not last.
- [30:58]
C
It.
- [30:59]
B
Does it say it's specifically because of the marketing stuff or it doesn't say.
- [31:02]
C
It turned out sarcastic marketing did not work.
- [31:06]
B
Turns out most people hate sarcasm.
- [31:09]
A
Oh, my God. Especially people are looking for, like, a new vodka.
- [31:12]
C
Yeah. Like making it fake sexy, where you're, like, uncomfortable with the sexiness. Not what people like. Well, and then the end of. I guess the rock story is that it worked out so well because, number one, we got to shoot part of another video. And number two is when the album started coming out, they loved that we were doing all this cross promotion and they bought us tons of billboards all around New York City.
- [31:32]
B
Yeah, it was amazing.
- [31:33]
C
And they were like, what do you guys think the billboard should be like? They just.
- [31:36]
B
And la, by the way.
- [31:37]
C
Yeah. They must have just had unlimited money. So we were just like, well, we have the COVID of our albums. Really nice. So why don't we combine it? So all of a sudden, we had billboards, we had the top of taxi cabs everywhere. I'll find some of these photos and we can put them in. This is. You know, we're jumping forward to when the album was coming out, you know, so it's actually in the future from this pod. But it was amazing. It was. It said turtleneck and chain, like, album date, and then just had a giant bottle of Rock Vodka. That honestly kind of just seemed like a joke. Like part of the joke of what if we were legitimate, we would have this vodka? It didn't have any negative part to it.
- [32:13]
B
It was a massive promo push for the Album. It was awesome.
- [32:15]
C
Yeah. Yeah, it was really great.
- [32:17]
A
It did feel like, in that exciting way for fans of yours, that you guys were getting away with something.
- [32:23]
C
Yes. Agreed.
- [32:24]
B
I would never speak on their behalf.
- [32:27]
C
But we weren't tricking them. They were just down. It was so nice.
- [32:30]
A
Yeah, no, they sound awesome. Can we watch a Klondike?
- [32:33]
C
Yeah. Now I believe there was three. And this is where yhorm will come in next week. And I think one maybe never came out, but I have the ones I found online.
- [32:40]
A
Yorm famously has never made three of a thing where anyone's been okay with all of them.
- [32:46]
C
By the third, they always learn their lesson after the second.
- [32:50]
A
The worst thing you could do is tell yhorm I love the first one, and he's like, oh, okay.
- [33:03]
B
Hello.
- [33:03]
D
What's going on, man? How you doing? What is up?
- [33:09]
B
Nothing.
- [33:09]
D
Nice. Did you see SVU last night?
- [33:13]
B
No, no, I missed it.
- [33:14]
D
Oh, man, you didn't miss much. Although Abrams is pregnant.
- [33:19]
E
Right.
- [33:20]
D
So you want to come over? Maybe help me set up my new surround sound?
- [33:24]
B
No, I'm good.
- [33:25]
F
Come on.
- [33:26]
D
Will you do that for me?
- [33:27]
B
I think I have work.
- [33:28]
D
Oh, right. That's cool. Oh, I don't know if I told you, but my girlfriend broke up with me.
- [33:38]
B
Sorry to hear that.
- [33:39]
F
Yeah.
- [33:40]
D
Yeah. I gotta move my stuff out of her apartment. I can use the hand.
- [33:43]
A
Mm.
- [33:44]
D
It's a lot of stuff. I mean, we were together for almost two years, but, I mean, you knew that.
- [33:48]
A
Yeah.
- [33:48]
D
Yeah. So you want to help me move? I mean, will you do that for me?
- [33:52]
G
Yeah.
- [33:52]
B
I don't think I can, Grandma.
- [33:54]
D
You owe me. I do stuff for you all the time. Remember when I took you to the dentist?
- [33:58]
B
I took you to the dentist.
- [33:59]
F
Right.
- [33:59]
D
I mean, that was so fun though, right?
- [34:02]
B
No.
- [34:02]
D
God, I'm so lonely. You wanna come over and snuggle me?
- [34:05]
C
What?
- [34:06]
D
No. This is snuggle. Come on. No. Did you water my plants while I'm gone?
- [34:10]
A
No.
- [34:10]
D
What do you mean no?
- [34:12]
C
Leave me alone.
- [34:13]
D
What'd you say? I'm sorry, what?
- [34:15]
B
I said leave me alone.
- [34:16]
D
Whoa. What's that for?
- [34:18]
B
You're just kind of a dick.
- [34:19]
D
I'm a dick? You.
- [34:21]
C
You.
- [34:22]
D
You bird.
- [34:23]
A
No, you.
- [34:24]
B
Man.
- [34:24]
D
If you don't come over here right now, I'm gonna tell everyone you your pants at that party last night. So you to come over.
- [34:33]
C
Fine.
- [34:34]
D
Be outside in 20 minutes.
- [34:38]
A
So, I mean, it's.
- [34:40]
C
It's because it's. What would you do for a Klondike bar set? Yeah, that's their famous thing. So He's. It's like, would you help him move?
- [34:46]
A
Right? So you guys, in this case, it's actually normal.
- [34:49]
C
Straight ahead marketing.
- [34:50]
A
You decided to make the Klondike bar, which is the product they're trying to.
- [34:55]
C
Sell, kneadable that Andy hates.
- [34:56]
A
Terrible. A terrible person, a terrible friend.
- [35:00]
B
You. The word you is very. Is loose.
- [35:03]
C
It's Yorm.
- [35:04]
B
This is all Yorm.
- [35:07]
C
Doritos saw this and was like, can you guys give us some of that magic?
- [35:12]
A
But take your foot off the brakes, if you know what I mean. Feel free to go for it.
- [35:18]
C
Yorm's comment in our text chain when I lay these, he's next level, literally hating the product being sold. Groundbreaking.
- [35:26]
B
Jesus. We're not going to get our free Klondikes with all this kind of talk.
- [35:30]
A
Well, that's. I do feel like that's what happened, right? Whoever agreed to Lifetime Klondikes loved that. And then again, you know, they move on. And somebody else comes in and then a new request for, like, a fridge full of Klondikes, and they're like, what's it for? They watch this and they're like, fuck them.
- [35:45]
C
They can take us to court. I stand by that, though. In today's. In today's world with social media and stuff, something like that could work because they could be like, whoa, Klondike's on one. Why are they doing crazy ads now?
- [35:57]
A
I mean, did it. Did it not res. Did it not work then did.
- [35:59]
C
I don't think. I don't know if it worked or didn't. There just. Wasn't it just.
- [36:02]
A
Yeah, I mean, I will say it's. It is perfect for vertical brand integration on a. On a TikTok video or something.
- [36:10]
C
That's why the way that people get, like, share all of Wendy's tweets. Because whoever runs Wendy's Socials doesn't hold back, and it doesn't feel corporate in that way. Yeah. Anyway, so we got Wendy's. We got Rock Vodka.
- [36:23]
B
What is happening today?
- [36:26]
C
Listen, man, the Super Bowl's coming up. I got ad fever.
- [36:29]
B
Jesus Christ.
- [36:31]
C
Fuck off, man. Here's the second one. Ready?
- [36:36]
D
Hey. Hey. I just had an idea.
- [36:39]
C
What?
- [36:40]
D
We should have a staring contest.
- [36:42]
B
You don't want to start that with me.
- [36:44]
D
Says you, Archie.
- [36:45]
B
I'm not an Archie.
- [36:46]
E
You're an Archie.
- [36:47]
D
Then prove it. Staring contest.
- [36:49]
B
Fine. Staring contest. Losers and Archie.
- [36:53]
D
Fantastic. Here we go. Hope you're ready to bring it. Cause believe me when I say that, I go, oh, wow. So that's how you're gonna Play it.
- [37:01]
C
Yep.
- [37:01]
D
Well, you are gonna have to bring more fuego than that. And here's why. Number one, I have style.
- [37:07]
C
Hey, fellas. What's.
- [37:09]
F
Damn it.
- [37:09]
D
I should get the.
- [37:10]
C
That's Bill entering.
- [37:11]
E
Yeah.
- [37:12]
B
Don't distract us, Archie.
- [37:13]
C
Oh, can I just stay and walk?
- [37:15]
D
No, no. Get the out.
- [37:18]
F
Okay, then.
- [37:18]
D
See you later.
- [37:19]
F
Byeeee.
- [37:21]
B
Why is your eye twitching?
- [37:23]
D
Uh, it's not. Yours is.
- [37:24]
B
No, it's not.
- [37:25]
A
Looks to me like both y' all's eyes is twitching.
- [37:27]
F
What did I say? Auntie?
- [37:29]
D
Get out.
- [37:30]
F
Get out of here.
- [37:32]
D
Nobody wants you in here. Go away and jump on, you son of a. Get the out.
- [37:39]
G
Okay, I can tell when I'm not wanted.
- [37:41]
D
Get out here, you dump truck. Okay, great. Thank you. Take care, buddy. Oh, someone looks like they're losing it.
- [37:55]
F
Damn it.
- [37:55]
D
Oh, you're so molded. I beat you.
- [37:58]
G
Who won?
- [37:59]
D
I did, Archie. Thank you for asking.
- [38:01]
A
It's really fun.
- [38:03]
C
Fantastic. Fantastic.
- [38:04]
A
I also didn't. When it started and called each other Archies. I just thought that was some slang I didn't know. And then it was really fun that it turns out they just have a friend named Archie that everybody hates.
- [38:15]
C
Do you think nascar? So for anybody who doesn't bother to go look these up, the way we're doing it is it's just a still frame of a Klondike bar that Yorm then in post, puts two eyeballs and a mouth on top of. So it's very easy to shoot because we're just shooting a Klondike bar sitting there. But NASCAR was apparently sponsoring Klondike. Do you think they appreciated having their. Their. Their logo. Their very protected logo just sitting in the middle of this?
- [38:41]
A
It's great. It's great. I totally missed it.
- [38:43]
C
All right. Yeah. There's a third one where he's driving a car that they never put out that Yorm has. And I know it because it's the only one I've actually seen in the last 20 years, because at some point, he found it on his hard drive and sent it to me. And remember, it has all our little. He keeps changing the radio stations. And me and Yorm had made all these fake, like, radio station, like, as if you like. Oh, five surfing clips. Yeah. And one of them was, like, guitar being like, kind of like surfer rock, and it's just like, surfer guy. You're doing so good on the waves. That's all we ever heard. And we would do, but we kind of love that.
- [39:17]
B
That was surfer guy.
- [39:20]
C
Exactly. We did a bunch of fake radio.
- [39:23]
B
Surfer guy, you're doing so good on the waves. I think we do owe the world a full version of that song.
- [39:30]
A
Yeah.
- [39:30]
C
Very good.
- [39:31]
A
Do you want to. Should we play we're back? Is that maybe the most helpful thing to do next?
- [39:35]
C
That's getting us into Turtleneck and Chain.
- [39:37]
A
Ye, I would love to hear it.
- [39:38]
C
I mean, we talked about not going quite as fast as we buzzed through incredibad. That we could actually go a little slower through turtle licking chain. And so this. Yeah, here's our music video.
- [39:48]
A
Hey, I have a quick question. Maybe while overthinking about it, would a thing. Would a good thing for the pod to be like, hey, hey. What do you guys. Are you watching anything you like right now? Are you listening to anything you like right now? Anyway, think about that and we'll watch this.
- [40:01]
C
That's for the Quaids to answer us.
- [40:03]
A
No, it's for us, like, just to talk. I mean, I feel like it's like, I think it'd be fun for us to talk about other people's stuff that we like. Anyway. Support comes from article. Article makes it effortless to create a stylish, long lasting home at an unbeatable price. My home just added some goosefa Stackable dining chairs in black. Gorgeous. Lovely weight to them as you stack them. And being able to stack chairs. Very helpful when you're living in New York City. Also, apologies if I mispronounced goosefa. I assume you're some Swedish person who's really good with chairs. Also, I can't say enough about the meticulous packaging when our chairs arrived from article. And I am very excited to tell you that article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. To claim, visit article.comisland and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout. That's article.com island for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. You know, they gave us a credit to split among the Lonely island and Keith got there first and he blew it all. Congrats, Keith, on beating us to the punch.
- [41:13]
C
So the album was coming out May 10, 2011. Obviously that's almost the full summer after. That's the spring. That's the next spring.
- [41:20]
A
Yeah.
- [41:21]
C
So we're jumping ahead to April 1st. April Fool's Day of 2011. We're basically jumping a year, but because we're talking about the summer before. But that's fine. It's our podcast. We can do whatever we want.
- [41:32]
B
Yeah, we put this video out on April Fool's day.
- [41:34]
C
We sure did.
- [41:35]
B
We have such a demented sense of humor.
- [41:38]
C
Yeah, and the caption says ask DJ Khaled. We the best Track one intro song off the Lonely Island's new album Turtleneck and chain album store May 10th. Here we go.
- [41:49]
F
Hey yo. New Lonely Island 2011. Let's get him keys. Hey yo, my dick don't work. That's is so pillow. I'm currently looking at me like you for real? Yo, hold up, hold up. We got to come harder than that. Yo, tell him, Andy. I think there might be something wrong with my dick. It's like a mustard stick of butter so soft that it can't feel. Come on, man. This is Lonely Island. People are counting on us. I got to run on these myself. Hey yo, I think I broke my dick in the 6A. So small and ugly smashing flat like it was playing Ruffy. Hold up, hold up. This is serious. Keep letting go. For real though I suffer from stinky dick Every time I take a piss it smells just like haha. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about, Andy. Shown how it's done like the fact that you cut off a steak smashed in like my paws went and stepped on a race Lonely Island Grammy nominated yo straight out the box with my soggy little shrimp I was a 8 year old girl before the doctor found my we make too much money for this murder music a bed cause my dick played a prank on my butt Hit a straight crack when I slept and stuck a laxative repository music what y' all know about I got hepatitis feet from a horse but no confusion, it wasn't from the sex it was a blood transfusion. What got horse blood? What y' all got? I write freaking fan fiction weird cartoons, got cgi Garbia with your mar I would like to see that. This that Garfield sex music now you're just showing off. I got a friend named Reggie who lives down at the D. Every other week I swing by and bring him some lunch. Oh, now that just sounds nice. I'mma call it right there. Game over Lonely Island. We started this fake rap. The world needs us.
- [43:37]
B
Bravo.
- [43:38]
A
I mean ain't nothing wrong with that.
- [43:40]
B
It is fun thinking about that. This was our like announcing that we were gonna do another album.
- [43:46]
C
Yes.
- [43:46]
B
Like little inside jokes to ourselves like Grammy nominated after the dumbest thing you've ever heard because it was true. But also we were just like it's so stupid.
- [43:55]
A
Yeah, you're both great in it. Jorma is insanely.
- [44:00]
B
This is one of the all time great Jorm performances of anything.
- [44:03]
A
I mean, it's. It is a. It's a goat performing. It's crazy how. I mean, I kind of couldn't believe it just listening to it now. How relentlessly great he is.
- [44:12]
C
There was a lot of. At the time, some of it still exists, but, like, people kind of labeling their crew of music. Like, Rick Ross has Maybach music.
- [44:21]
A
Yeah.
- [44:22]
C
And there really was, like, Murder, Inc. And there's just a lot of that kind of labeling. And so that's why we thought it was funny to just keep reasserting what this is by the end. It's Garfield Sex Music, which we did.
- [44:33]
B
Consider as the name for the album.
- [44:35]
C
Yeah, we considered calling it Garfield Sex Music.
- [44:38]
A
Didn't really. Yeah.
- [44:38]
B
Like, kind of as a. Like, Timberlake reference.
- [44:42]
C
Future Sex Love sounds. But also as a. What was the. Because there's Cadillac music. What was the Outkast one, though, called, where it was all in one. There was no spaces between the two.
- [44:53]
B
Southern playlist of Cadillac music.
- [44:55]
A
Yeah, yeah.
- [44:56]
C
Garfield sex music. All one word.
- [44:57]
A
Yeah.
- [44:58]
C
Three X's on the sex, obviously.
- [45:00]
B
Interesting. I didn't even think about the Outkast reference.
- [45:03]
C
Well, the reference was speaker box as well, because of the three X's on speaker box.
- [45:07]
A
Right.
- [45:07]
B
And you were like, I wish they were gays.
- [45:09]
C
And. No, no, Andy again. But the speaker. We were definitely gonna do Garfield Sex, Sex, Sex music.
- [45:17]
A
Right.
- [45:18]
C
All as one word.
- [45:19]
A
How far down the line did Garfield Sex Music come as the title?
- [45:22]
C
Not very. It was just on our list.
- [45:24]
A
Gotcha.
- [45:24]
B
I don't know about that.
- [45:25]
C
It might have gone too far.
- [45:27]
B
I think once we. Once we decided on Turtleneck Chain, we were very happy. But I think there were a few other ideas in the mix for the duration of recording, at least.
- [45:34]
C
Yeah, definitely. We always had a nice list. Yeah. There's nothing wrong with that video. We shot it for very cheap. Just all around New York. Like, I'm in my real apartment, my new apartment. That's no longer the one that me and Andy had had. Like, I believe that's my real bed with America Ferreira.
- [45:51]
A
Yeah.
- [45:51]
B
Shout out America.
- [45:52]
C
Yeah.
- [45:52]
B
Very nice of her to come.
- [45:53]
C
It was so nice for her to just. She just came over. Like, we had no crew. Like, there was two people in the.
- [45:58]
B
Crew just to be in it, to class it up and make us look cool. It was very nice of her.
- [46:01]
C
We had the same publicist, Carrie, and she. She just was like, america might be down. I'll text her. And she just came through and did it. And it's also.
- [46:08]
A
I mean, again, it's that really funny thing of just super cocky. Also, you have a reason to be cocky because you have a new album and it's good. So your second album's also good. So you have real. And then, of course, all you do is rap about how your dicks don't work. Is just really fun.
- [46:23]
C
Yeah.
- [46:23]
B
There's a lot of turns in it that I love, but it wasn't from the sex. It was a blood transfusion. Regarding the hepatitis from the horse, Yorm.
- [46:32]
A
Screaming, he has horse blood.
- [46:33]
B
Motherfuckers got horse blood. What y' all got?
- [46:35]
C
But he's not denying having had sex with a horse blood.
- [46:37]
B
But I like. Yeah, I love a lot of backstory. Super fast like that.
- [46:41]
C
Yeah.
- [46:41]
A
Yeah. That obviously was written to be the first song on the album.
- [46:46]
B
Yep.
- [46:47]
C
Yeah.
- [46:47]
A
Or written to be a song that would promote that the album was coming out. What was the most important?
- [46:51]
C
We all. I mean, we had written it this summer that we're actually talking about the year before as an intro to the album.
- [46:57]
B
Yes.
- [46:57]
C
As track one.
- [46:58]
B
And that beat, we were immediately like.
- [46:59]
C
Oh, I believe it was a fellow named B Sides. And we used a couple of his beats on this record. And they all sounded like, to us, like just Blaze beat style beats that are just sample heavy, but just. They're kind of our favorite kind of beat there is.
- [47:13]
B
But truth, I mean, they sound like B side beats because I remember that this was one of the cases where you guys started writing it, but held a spot for me, which doesn't always happen. Seth, how many push ups can you do? Like, if right now it was like, do as many as you can all in a row.
- [47:33]
A
75, 20, 22.
- [47:35]
C
What? Jesus. No way. Do you work out, Seth? No, but do it proper ones where you really do it. I guess it matters how fast you're going.
- [47:42]
B
Do.
- [47:42]
A
I wouldn't do an unproper pushup.
- [47:44]
B
Will you do it right now?
- [47:48]
C
Move the camera? Get the floor.
- [47:49]
A
It feels like.
- [47:51]
B
Come on, we gotta do something exciting on this episode besides talk about commercials. Oh, my God. All right, we're counting.
- [47:57]
C
This is all right. He moved it down to floor level.
- [47:59]
B
If he's really about to do it.
- [48:00]
C
The mic is on the floor next to him.
- [48:02]
B
Oh, my God.
- [48:03]
C
He's on a carpet. He's in a sweatshirt. Look at how cold.
- [48:06]
B
Look how confident he is. Ready?
- [48:07]
C
He's not gonna over. Well, we can't see if his knees are on the ground. He could be doing it with his knees.
- [48:10]
B
3, 4, 5.
- [48:12]
C
He framed out his knees.
- [48:13]
B
6, 7, 8, 9, 10.
- [48:18]
C
These look pretty good.
- [48:19]
B
11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16.
- [48:24]
C
Definitely tired.
- [48:25]
B
17, 18.
- [48:27]
C
How many friends think you do?
- [48:28]
B
20, 21, 22, 23, 24.
- [48:32]
A
Go for it.
- [48:34]
C
26 is getting red.
- [48:35]
B
27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35. Slowing down.
- [48:45]
C
He's slowing down.
- [48:46]
B
36.
- [48:47]
C
Oh, God.
- [48:47]
B
36. But he held his. Had his headphones and glasses on the whole time.
- [48:51]
C
Yeah, his neck vein was ready to pop, bro.
- [48:54]
B
I'm impressed.
- [48:55]
C
Yeah, that was way more than anything I could do.
- [48:57]
B
36. Is that what it was? Or 37?
- [48:59]
A
No, 35. I think the last one I. You don't get points for going down.
- [49:04]
B
Nice work, buddy. Are you just gassing now? Should we call it? I think we probably could just.
- [49:07]
A
I mean, I think we can call it. I think.
- [49:09]
C
Do you get exercise, Seth?
- [49:11]
A
Not that much. Obviously less than I should to hit this.
- [49:14]
B
That was mind blowing then. I thought you went to the gym all the time.
- [49:17]
A
I have started going again post New Year's, so. That's why I was overconfident.
- [49:22]
C
That's why you were cocky.
- [49:23]
B
Nice work, buddy.
- [49:24]
A
Jeff, can we just edit this in? When I say 75 and 50. 20, 22. And then you guys will be blown away that I do. I do way more than I thought I could. All right, I know you alluded to it, but real quick. Spelling bee.
- [49:38]
B
Oh, yep, here we go.
- [49:39]
A
Jack Black. Spelling bee.
- [49:45]
F
Spelling bee.
- [49:48]
B
I needed one hint.
- [49:50]
A
What was your last word?
- [49:51]
B
I gotta look. It's been a busy day. Seth.
- [49:54]
A
Yeah.
- [49:55]
B
What about you?
- [49:55]
A
I think I'm like, four short.
- [49:57]
B
Oh, you haven't finished.
- [49:59]
A
Yeah, yeah, but I mean, we all have busy days.
- [50:01]
C
Seth's doing the rest of the pod from the floor. For the record, he did not get back up. He's laying down one.
- [50:08]
B
One hint for G. Gamine.
- [50:10]
A
What was it?
- [50:11]
B
Or G, A, M, I, N, E.
- [50:12]
A
Oh, I had that. I had gamine.
- [50:14]
B
Do you know what it means?
- [50:15]
A
It means like it's some kind of animal.
- [50:18]
B
Like it's attractively boyish.
- [50:20]
C
I was wrong.
- [50:21]
B
It's an interesting word.
- [50:22]
C
Seth, did you listen to or watch something you liked? You were saying. Why didn't we talk about it?
- [50:26]
A
I like that new little Game of.
- [50:27]
B
Thrones young woman with a mischievous boyish.
- [50:29]
C
Is that ch. Is that kid appropriate?
- [50:31]
B
The definition of gamine? Yeah. I don't know. It seems off.
- [50:35]
C
Jeez. The new Game of Thrones show, it seemed like maybe it was kid appropriate, but it's not. But it is comedic.
- [50:40]
B
There's like, huge dicks in it and stuff.
- [50:43]
A
Yeah, right away I read.
- [50:44]
C
But it is comedic in a way.
- [50:46]
A
It is. It is comedic and light. Although it's going to get dark.
- [50:49]
C
So it's like Bone Patrol andy. Yeah. Like 28 days later. Bone Patrol. You weren't on that app.
- [50:54]
B
Yeah. Bone Patrol.
- [50:56]
A
Did you see Bone Patrol Andy?
- [50:57]
B
No.
- [50:58]
C
No, Andy doesn't see anything.
- [50:59]
B
Isn't it Bone Temple?
- [51:00]
A
Yeah.
- [51:00]
C
Yeah. But y kept calling it Bone Patrol when.
- [51:03]
B
When I wasn't here.
- [51:04]
C
Yeah.
- [51:04]
A
Yeah.
- [51:05]
C
And he kept.
- [51:06]
B
Don't listen to podcasts.
- [51:07]
C
The zombie dicks and about the zombie blood and could it get it hard. And it was. It was weird.
- [51:12]
A
This has really turned into like not a podcast faster than any episode. Like I'm. Mostly because I'm like been on the floor since the push ups and I'm like trying to wonder what happened that I started doing them.
- [51:21]
B
It's a nice reminder that you can do a podcast while lying on the floor.
- [51:25]
C
Yeah, that's a good. That's good for all of us to remember for next time.
- [51:28]
B
Yeah.
- [51:29]
A
Wait, hold on. Can I share a screen real quick? Sure, man.
- [51:32]
C
It's a free country for at least a little while longer.
- [51:35]
B
I mean, don't get me started, Keith.
- [51:37]
C
I don't want to get you started.
- [51:40]
B
Is it true that if someone starts you up, you'll never stop?
- [51:43]
C
Yeah, if they wind me up, I go nuts.
- [51:46]
B
That seems actually a little inappropriate.
- [51:49]
C
It's just the way it is. It sucks.
- [51:55]
B
Just the way it is. It sucks.
- [51:58]
C
Yeah, I know.
- [52:00]
B
It's a nightmare for everyone. It's sort of the main problem with all of Earth.
- [52:04]
C
Yeah.
- [52:05]
B
But here we are. If you start me up, I'll never stop me. Akiva.
- [52:09]
C
Yeah, Ask. Ask Mick or any of the guys you know.
- [52:12]
A
All right. We have a lot. We have a whole album to go through. It's called Turtleneck and Chain. We can't wait to talk to you guys more about it.
- [52:17]
C
They don't all have videos, you know. A lot of them will just have to listen.
- [52:20]
B
It'll be fun songs and, you know, Quaid Army. Anyone out there, even if you're not quite army, just casual listener. If you hated this episode, be sure to let us know.
- [52:29]
C
Do not. Don't listen to him. We can't take it. We're fr. We're very fragile right now.
- [52:34]
B
I rank it low.
- [52:35]
C
Seth learned he can do literally 50% of the push ups. Thought he did. That's going to fucking.
- [52:40]
A
But 70% of my second number.
- [52:42]
B
Seth, are you like actually in trouble for the rest of the night and A little bit tomorrow as well. Now because of those push ups, I.
- [52:48]
A
Mean, I won't be able to pick up my daughter. Like, I won't be able to lift her in the air.
- [52:53]
C
Yeah, yeah, you'll be so sore your arms won't be able to go butcher.
- [52:55]
B
Here's a thought. Here's a quick thought before we. Peace out. People won't know this was the case until this moment if it was in it. But should we put like lounge music or some kind of dinky donkey little beat underneath me? Counting your push ups?
- [53:08]
C
Yeah, I think so.
- [53:10]
B
Okay, cool. So if you're hearing this now and the music was in, you know that this is. We did it retroactively.
- [53:15]
A
Yeah, we decided after the fact.
- [53:16]
C
Like light game show thinking music.
- [53:19]
A
We did. Famously. Kevin Miller and I were part of a. I mean, did we ever talk about the push up contest? It was a famous thing that happened before you guys were on SNL where basically Tina and Amy, like Tuesday night at dinner was like, who here can do the most push ups? And made every man do push ups. And it was like, definitely. If it was like men who made women do it, it would have been like a giant HR crisis.
- [53:41]
C
There is a typed up, so.
- [53:43]
A
Oh, yeah, that's the typed up.
- [53:44]
C
So Kevin just sent a typed up list of how many everybody did. So it is a typed piece of paper that's all wrinkled. It's a photo of it. It says first Annual SNL Push up contest results. Oh, my God. So somebody is suggesting this happens once a year?
- [54:00]
A
Yeah.
- [54:00]
C
Wait, Kevin has it because he won. Kevin won.
- [54:03]
A
Kevin Miller won. And I should say. So this was.
- [54:05]
C
And you got third place.
- [54:06]
A
I did 53. Yeah. I was third place.
- [54:09]
C
So you were way younger, could do 53 and you thought now you could do 70.
- [54:14]
A
I don't know. I didn't know. I didn't. Oh, and by the way, look at this.
- [54:17]
C
They then.
- [54:18]
A
Did you see the side? The category? I won bottom right.
- [54:21]
B
Skinny dudes.
- [54:22]
C
Skinny dudes.
- [54:23]
B
Metrosexuals.
- [54:25]
C
Metrosexuals.
- [54:26]
A
I was the highest scoring metrosexual.
- [54:28]
C
Boy, that is really of the time.
- [54:30]
B
I like that they had little side sections.
- [54:32]
C
There's categories. There's the over 40 shoemaker got zero.
- [54:36]
B
Just update fathers.
- [54:38]
A
Fathers.
- [54:39]
C
That is a separate category. Rob Riggles, the Ex Marine. Why did he get the fewest?
- [54:44]
A
Why does he have two stars next to him?
- [54:46]
C
Well, it's an asterisk at the end. It says served as a starter. What does that mean?
- [54:50]
A
Oh, I think maybe he was our pacesetter.
- [54:52]
B
Yeah, yeah.
- [54:52]
A
So he didn't quite know how many people were going to actually get after.
- [54:55]
B
And then there was another star that.
- [54:57]
C
Says claims finesse got 50, but it says claims 59 over four. Contested over four. Yeah, yeah.
- [55:04]
A
So that is, I will say so that. What year is that, Kev?
- [55:07]
C
It was definitely before 2005.
- [55:09]
A
So that's 20 plus years ago. And I've dropped 18 pushups. And they say you lose one a year.
- [55:15]
C
Yeah, but what does it say about your mental state that your mental state thought you could do more?
- [55:19]
A
I just think that I'm as one of these many. You know, it's just old man confidence.
- [55:24]
B
Right.
- [55:25]
A
No, I'm just one of these new age guys that is, you know, constantly recycling my blood out with younger blood.
- [55:32]
C
Getting stronger as you do.
- [55:33]
B
Can we add one other thing? And I'll just get it clean now and you guys can put it in during Seth's push ups. So I'm just gonna say it clean and you can just lay it over even if I'm counting and talking.
- [55:43]
G
Go for it, Seth.
- [55:45]
B
Okay, so then if people heard that during his pushups, they'll know that I just did that now also.
- [55:49]
C
Yeah, yeah. Leave it in both places.
- [55:51]
A
All right. Now obviously the other thing I'll say is, you know, there was no prep obviously today, like, you know, I didn't eat right or anything. So once a month, can we do a push up contest?
- [56:00]
C
Like just.
- [56:00]
A
How's Seth doing on pushups?
- [56:02]
B
100% great.
- [56:03]
C
Just to check in for you.
- [56:04]
B
Yeah, I think we were obligated to.
- [56:06]
C
A contest with yourself.
- [56:07]
A
Yeah.
- [56:08]
C
Once again, I don't think I could do as many as you did. But again, you framed your knees out and they might have been on the ground.
- [56:14]
A
I'm telling you on my chill.
- [56:16]
B
I trust Seth. Seth is not dishonest about pushups. That's one thing I know for sure.
- [56:20]
A
Yeah.
- [56:20]
C
All right, we have one last thing, guys. Rachel Lynn just sent me the voice note about Rock Vodka.
- [56:25]
A
All right, let's hear it.
- [56:27]
G
Hi, guys. Rach here reporting in. Genuinely hilarious at the thing you asked for. My commentary on is Rock Vodka. But I guess if there was an expert on rock vodka, it would be me. My memory is that you guys shot a commercial for them over a summer break and then they generously sent you guys a couple of cases of Rock Vodka. And then you guys generously sent gave me one of those cases. And then I decided like a genius that I was going to drink an entire case of Rock Vodka with my friends. My friends at SNL over the course of a season, I think there was 20 bottles in the case. And SNL seasons are, like 21 shows, so that does sound insane now. But I was. Was in my twenties then, and I loved vodka.
- [57:29]
A
So.
- [57:31]
G
Yeah, also, one of the great parts of working on digital shorts, in addition, obviously, to working with you guys, was that my work was, for the most part, done by the live show. So I could, like, really crack into a rock and get to partying during the show so that I was kind of, like, working with a pretty solid piece buzz or sometimes just drunk going into the after parties. And then I didn't need to buy drinks at the party. And so that was sort of just like, solid fiscal responsibility on my part. But, yeah, I also remember that, like, I'm not sure what they put in Rock Vodka, but it would make me go crazy. It would be, like, very, very fun, wild, crazy drunk, where you're just like. Like, yeah, you're just doing nutso stuff. And it would result in. I think. I mean, Andy probably remembers it better because I was drunk on Rock Vodka, most likely, but Andy one time was leaving an after party. I think it was probably Heartland Brewery. And as he was driving away, he saw me walking through Times Square back towards Heartland Brewery with two just, like, tall glasses of beer in my hand.
- [58:46]
C
Who knows, away from Times, go to.
- [58:49]
G
The M and M store or something stupid like that.
- [58:51]
C
She took two to go. She was holding two giant cups.
- [58:53]
G
But, yeah, Rock Vodka. God, what a season. The Rock Vodka. Do they still make that?
- [58:59]
C
Are you.
- [58:59]
G
You guys should do another commercial for them.
- [59:01]
C
We basically did.
- [59:02]
G
And they should send us more cases of Rock Vodka.
- [59:05]
B
Okay.
- [59:06]
G
That's all I remember.
- [59:09]
A
Oh, wait.
- [59:10]
G
If anyone's wondering, we did. We did finish. I did finish the case of Rock Vodka. Over the course of the season, we were rock stars, you know, in the sense of the word rock being Rock Vodka. Okay, bye, guys. Love you.
- [59:25]
B
Love you, Rach. Thank you.
- [59:26]
A
The best thinking. Maybe we're finding out that it wasn't the marketing, but that rock vog had just made people crazy. It was great. It was crazy vodka.
- [59:34]
B
It is still. One of my fondest memories of my whole life was us being in the car, going home and just seeing Rach, like, super casually walking towards Times Square with two full pints of beer in her hands, just double fisting.
- [59:49]
A
Okay, love you guys.
- [59:50]
B
Love you guys.
- [59:51]
C
Love you.
- [59:51]
B
Later, Arnold.
- [59:52]
C
Later, Quaid.