The Magnus Archives: Sheeplechase 5 – "Coke-Conspirators"

Release Date: October 30, 2025
Host: Georgie Barker
Co-host: Celia Ripley
Produced by: Rusty Quill

Overview

This episode of Sheeplechase—the Magnus Archives’ spinoff focused on conspiracies—dives deep into the mythology, controversy, and conspiracies surrounding New Coke, Coca-Cola’s notorious 1985 recipe change. Hosts Georgie Barker and Celia Ripley use their signature mix of skepticism, snark, and genuine curiosity to explore whether the ill-fated soda was a marketing blunder, a Machiavellian ploy, or something even stranger.

Main Discussion & Key Points

1. Social Media Drama (04:38–06:04)

• Georgie updates listeners about a recent spat with well-known paranormal investigator Melanie King, who publicly insulted Georgie’s podcast, calling it a “misinformation podcast.”
• Quote:
  • “After all, the ghost hunters came at me for being a Flat Earth Illuminati cult leader. Which, if they’d actually listened to our episode on the Illuminati, doesn’t even make sense.” — Georgie [05:04]
• Georgie thanks supporters and announces a break from social media due to the backlash.

2. Episode Introduction & Topic Choice (06:56–08:03)

• Celia reveals today’s topic—chosen based on Georgie’s joke from the previous week—is “New Coke.”
• Lively tone set with playful skepticism and banter, poking fun at 1980s corporate America.

3. The New Coke Debacle: What Happened? (08:03–10:54)

• Celia narrates the business history: Coca-Cola’s declining dominance in the market, loss to Pepsi, the appointment of CEO Roberto Goizueta, and the decision to overhaul the century-old recipe.
• They note the internal business logic: Baby Boomers moving to Diet Coke and Pepsi’s growing younger market.
• Quote:
  • “New CEO Roberto Goizueta now has one job. Beat Pepsi at any cost. And it’s time to shake things up.” — Celia [07:13]

4. Public Backlash and Cultural Reactions (09:55–12:41)

• The new formula performs well in taste tests but bombs publicly due to backlash. 10% of focus group participants hated the change, becoming extremely vocal.
• They discuss Americana and regional pride (Atlanta-based Coke versus New York’s Pepsi).
• Quote:
  • “Some Southerners even framed it as a continuation of the American Civil War… So people from Southern states were calling to complain that Coke was surrendering to the Yankees.” — Celia [10:12]
• Emotional public responses, escalated to the absurd:
  • “There are only two things in my life. God and Coca Cola. Now you have taken one of those things away from me.” — Quoted by Celia [12:29]
  • “We went to war in Japan over that freedom.” — Celia quoting a complainant [12:41]

5. Conspiracy Theories Explored

A. The “Deliberate Flop” Theory (13:05–13:43)

• Suggestion that Coca-Cola introduced New Coke intending it to fail, stoking nostalgia and love for the original.
• Key rebuttal:
  • “We’re not that smart and we’re not that dumb.” — Goizueta, quoted by Celia [13:22]
• But the marketing push does appear to have helped Coke win the “Cola Wars.”

B. Bottling Company Dispute Theory (14:05–16:08)

• Celia explains Coke’s messy business with bottling companies: bottlers complained that the value of Coke syrup was tied to its “unchangeable legacy,” which New Coke undermined.
• Theorized corporate machinations: The new recipe shifts the value debate and, after settling disputes, Coca-Cola buys up its bottlers.
• Quote:
  • “A monopoly with extra steps, essentially.” — Georgie [14:53]

C. Hidden Ingredient Change Theory (16:15–17:09)

• Celia unpacks the internet suggestion that New Coke distracted customers from a broader switch from cane sugar to high fructose corn syrup.
• Georgie cracks jokes about the infamous removal of cocaine, shifting into comedic territory.

D. The Cocaine Conspiracy (17:09–18:15)

• Georgie spins a theory: What if there was still cocaine in Coke up until 1985, and the whole New Coke debacle was a cover for removing it due to Reagan’s War on Drugs?

• Celia, surprisingly, notes Coke does have a special license to import decocainized coca leaves.

• The logistical and economic challenges of this conspiracy are raised and debunked with humor.

• Quote:

  • Georgie: “It just needs a little kick. A baby kick.”
  • Celia: “Babies can kick quite hard.”
  • Georgie: “A puppy kick, then. From a baby dachshund.” [18:54–19:11]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “When they took old coke off the market, they violated my freedom of choice. It’s as basic as the Magna Carta, the Declaration of Independence.” — Celia, quoting a letter [12:41]
• “All is fair in love and soda war, Celia.” — Georgie [19:16]
• “Conditional vindication.” — Georgie, on her half-baked theory [19:31]

Timestamps: Important Segments

• 04:38 — Show begins; Georgie addresses recent online drama.
• 07:01 — New Coke becomes the week’s topic.
• 08:45 — Taste tests and surprising public response.
• 10:12–10:22 — American Civil War & regional pride invoked in Cola disputes.
• 12:41 — Outrageous complaint quotes.
• 13:05 — First conspiracy: “They did it on purpose!”
• 14:05 — Bottlers’ dispute and “monopoly with extra steps.”
• 16:25 — “Hidden ingredient” and shifting blame away from recipe changes.
• 17:09–18:15 — The playful “cocaine theory” segment.
• 19:37 — Switch to sponsor/joke ad and episode wrap-up banter.

Tone & Style

The conversation is wryly comic, with Celia as the eternal skeptic and Georgie as the gleeful conspiracy theorist. Genuine business analysis and cultural history are peppered with absurd digressions (“puppy kicks of cocaine”), satirical fake ads, and mutual ribbing.

Conclusion

Sheeplechase 5: Coke-Conspirators treats the New Coke saga as a springboard for examining the overlap between public perception, marketing blunders, and the endless human appetite for conspiracy. While the hosts ultimately think there’s little evidence for dark corporate master plans—or secret 1980s cocaine in your Coke—they admit that the mixture of nostalgia, business, and collective hysteria was more than enough to fuel fiery debate for decades.

Final Takeaway:
“As long as soft drinks are involved, sometimes the truth is weirder and funnier than any conspiracy.”