Unnamed Protester (9:59)

There was a march through Manhattan today in support of congestion pricing. Dozens of people rallied from Times Square to Union Square. They're expressing outrage over the sudden decision by Governor Hochul to put congestion pricing on an indefinite pause.

Matt Walsh (10:14)

It's been fully vetted. It's a funding source for the MTA for years and years to come. Vital services, ADA upgrades, signal upgrades, all of these capital projects that we just don't have any other way to pay with. I'm here to protest because we've been the subject of a great betrayal by the governor. If you want to explain to someone how cities like New York and so many others across the country are collapsing, just show them that clip. You know, according to the residents of the city, it's a great betrayal that the government isn't taxing them. They're mad that they aren't being taxed. I mean, this is how these people think. Now, to be fair, the first guy was arguably a little less pathetic. He was talking about all the alleged benefits that will result from this tax scheme. He's saying that they'll be able to improve the subway system to make it more accessible, which is a talking point that a lot of these protesters used.

Unnamed Protester (11:09)

Watch a unique rally today in favor of congestion pricing. Dozens of strollers parked outside a Brooklyn subway station amid growing calls for the plan to be put back in place. The march was held near the Hoyt Schimmerhorn station, which was slated for elevator upgrades before congestion pricing was stopped. Parents brought their strollers out, showing why they need an easier way to reach subway platforms.

Matt Walsh (11:33)

Yeah, that only 25% of our transit system is accessible is not okay. Right? Folks need to get to work. They need to get to school. We have a message for the governor. Today, the parents of New York City demand congestion prices. We demand to be taxed. Take more of our money, please. Now, one of the many false assumptions these people are making is that more money will improve the subway system. But, you know, which is, of course, the left. That's what they assume about everything. Just throw more money at it will automatically make it better. And no matter how many billions you spend on something, and it just gets worse and worse, they never. They never. The correlation there, they just never pick up on, because, of course, it doesn't work that way. And we know that because the New York subway system is a comically obvious example of waste and mismanagement in government. For example, the Second Avenue subway that was recently constructed in Manhattan somehow costs more money than any other similar subway system on the planet. By a lot quoting from Bloomberg. At $2.5 billion per mile, construction costs for the 1.8 mile phase one of the Second Avenue subway were 8 to 12 times more expensive than similar subway projects in Italy, Istanbul, Sweden, Paris, Berlin, and Spain. Keep in mind, too, that these are people that they want to build. You know, they have dreams of high speed rail across the entire country, right? And they, and they say that we can easily do this because they do this in European countries, because like, they don't understand that these European countries are not even the size of one of our mid sized states. But with this kind of cost, I mean, how much would it cost if they tried to do this across the entire country? Trillions of dollars. So that's one potential way to raise revenue right off the bat. They could just stop lighting money on fire. Secondly, if you're worried about congestion in Manhattan, you could try a lot of things besides charging people to drive their cars. You could, for example, try opening more lanes instead of closing them for cyclists. Anyone who's ever driven through Manhattan or any large city can tell you that. Here's just one example I want y'all to see.

Unnamed Delivery Driver (13:39)

This is New York City. This is what they're doing to the lanes. Look at that, look at that. They bottleneck in the lanes, bro. This is 8th Avenue, right? So one, two, three lanes. That's it. There's only three lanes uptown. And I wish I could have showed you the camera prior to this because the lane that I'm driving in now, they cut off, look at them. They cut this lane off right here. This is another lane. Look at that, look at that. They killed three lanes. And they talking about congestion.

Matt Walsh (14:15)

That's something that no one ever mentions as a possible solution in every city to deal with congestion. There's a lot of it here in Nashville. Get rid of the stupid bike lanes. You know, you'll find the same thing in cities all over the country. You have to sit in traffic because the city has blocked off entire lanes so people can ride their bicycles in the street. As I've said many times, they might as well block off lanes so that you can use your ab roller or your bench press in the middle of the street. I mean, if you want to exercise, that's great. I support it. You shouldn't be doing it in the road when everyone is trying to commute to work. Now, one of the arguments you'll hear from these activists is that somehow this new tax will reduce carbon emissions and change the weather and save the planet. This is science. You see, Step one, you pay a toll. Step three, hurricanes stop happening. The problem is that step two is a little bit foggy. And anyway, even if you assume that reducing carbon emissions by a tiny amount will change the weather for the better, it's a moot point because this won't actually reduce carbon emissions. Instead, traffic is going to move elsewhere. People living in New Jersey understand that pretty well, which is why they. They tried to sue to stop the tax from taking place. But regardless, even if you don't buy any of the counterarguments, even if you think that New York's government urgently needs more money to improve the subway, it's still not clear why congestion pricing is the best way to raise that revenue. Why not raise taxes on those evil corporations the left claims to hate so much? Why didn't they do that? Instead, they raise it on regular citizens. It only makes sense when you realize, again, that the objective is to force more people into public transit and get them off the roads. And admittedly, this whole fiasco may seem irrelevant to anyone who has the good sense to not live in New York. But this sort of madness can be found in varying degrees wherever Democrats have power. I mean, the idea that Trump's reelection would be some kind of wake up call for elected Democrats is a fantasy. They can't be woken up because they aren't asleep. They're not in some sort of trance. They're doing exactly what they want, and their policies are having precisely the effect that they intend. Here, for example, here's just an image for you. This is an image from the New York subway system, and this is how people wait now for the train to come. You'll notice that everyone is standing against the wall in a line because they don't want to get pushed on the tracks by some psycho. I mean, it's. Which is. That's smart. I mean, that's how you should line up. But it's just straight up dystopian that it's come to this. And you have to wonder how long people will put up with it. If there's any waking up that can happen and must happen, it's among the average citizens in places like New York and cities across the country. If they ever come to their senses and realize that the people they put in power are actively and intentionally making their lives worse in every measurable way, then maybe things will start to change for the better. But unfortunately for everyone living in New York, based on the celebrations we're seeing in support of this tax, which is really a tax on using your own property and going about your daily life, it doesn't look like that will happen anytime soon. Now, let's get to our five headlines. Did you know that 80% of resolutions fail by February? Well, this year. This year can be different. It really can, because I discovered something that's transformed my approach to health it's called Lumen, the world's first handheld metabolic coach. Here's what makes Lumen special It measures your metabolism through your breath, showing you whether you're burning fats or carbs. Every morning, I take a quick breath into my lumen and it gives me personalized nutrition recommendations for the day. I can even check before and after workouts to optimize my fitness routine. Make sure I'm staying on track for my 2025 goals. You see, your metabolism is like your body's engine. It's central to everything from energy levels to sleep quality. What I love about Lumen is how it adapts to your body's needs. Because your metabolism is at the center of everything your body does, optimal metabolic health translates to a bunch of benefits, including easier weight management, improved energy levels, better fitness results, better sleep, et cetera. And who doesn't want all that? The best part? Lumen provides clear insights and guidance to help you make informed decisions about your health. It's not about quick fixes. It's about understanding your body and making sustainable changes. Take the next step to improve your health. Go to Lumen Me Walsh to get 20% off your Lumen, that is L u m e n me Walsh for 20% off your purchase. Thank you Lumen, for sponsoring this episode. So we'll begin our five headlines with the news over the weekend. New York Post reports President Biden bestowed woke Democratic mega donor George Soros with the Presidential Medal of Freedom on Saturday, outraging critics who ripped the old selection as a national disgrace. Soros, 94, 94 years old guy just refuses to die, just just lingers on was among the 19 people chosen to receive the nation's highest civilian honor at the White House, a group that included U2 frontman Bono, actor Denzel Washington and who was the other one? Hillary Clinton also awarded one George Soros spent this is Montana Senator Tim Sheehy. George Soros spent millions electing soft on crime politicians that let criminals wreak havoc in our major cities. Hillary Clinton abandoned our Navy Seals in Libya and yet she's winning the award. Of course, Biden said that of Soros said his inspiring generosity reminds us all of our capacity and our obligation to stand up to the abuse of power and to be guardians of democracy and all people yearning to be free. Biden repeatedly thanked Soros for what he called all you've done to help this country. Yes, all he's done to help this country by making it less safe, less prosperous, less free, more dangerous, more plagued by crime and drugs. George soros next to Barack Obama, has inflicted more harm on this country than probably any other single human being living in the world today, maybe ever giving him a Medal of Freedom. And Hillary Clinton also, and nearly everyone else on the list, is a joke. I mean, if anything, maybe you give Hillary Clinton the Medal of Honor for all of her confirmed kills, but really the award they both deserve is to die in prison and instead they get the Medal of Freedom. I hope, rather than just complaining about this cuz that gets old after a while, I hope that Trump. This is one of the many things that I hope Trump responds to when he's in office, and I hope he responds to this by immediately awarding the Medal of Freedom to Daniel Penny when he takes office. I mean, I wanted him to do that. Regardless, even if George Soros hadn't gotten the award, I'd still think that that should happen. Daniel Penney should get it because he deserves it. But now, now that Biden is giving it to George Soros, I mean, he's using the Medal of Freedom to troll conservatives. That's what he's doing. That's the only reason that he did it. That's what this is all about. So in that case, I mean, I'd like to see Trump give the Medal of Freedom to Derek Chauvin. Give it to Derek Chauvin. Derek Chauvin also deserves it. The guy's been sitting in prison for the crime of protecting his community from a dangerous drug addled criminal. So here's the roster of people that I think Trump should give the Medal of Freedom to, like in his first week in office. Daniel Penny, Derek Chauvin, Kyle Rittenhouse. Give it to those three guys. And also, who was that guy who shot the climate protesters down in South America or Central America somewhere? It was like Brazil or Panama, I think. I think he was an American citizen, I believe. And there were climate protesters blocking the road and he shot him, which I don't condone. I'm not condoning it one bit. Just to be clear. I would never condone something like that in a show that's on YouTube. But give him the Medal of Freedom too. I mean, he's, he's more deserving than George Soros and he's killed far fewer people. Actually, we didn't even mention the most absurd recipient on Saturday for some unknown reason. Bill Nye the Science Guy was also given a medal. I think we have a clip of that. So Bill Nye was a popular. If you don't remember, he was a popular, somewhat popular children's TV character for a brief time in the 90s, he has not been relevant or done anything that has made any cultural impact of any kind at all since the 90s. It's been at least 30 years since Bill Nye has contributed anything at all to the culture, if he ever really contributed much of anything to begin with. If you're gonna give the Medal of freedom to 90s TV characters who haven't been relevant in two and a half decades, why not give it to the Power Rangers? I wanna see Trump do that also. That's the second week. Bring all the original Power Rangers up there in their suits and give them Medal of Freedom. Teletubbies. Barney. How about Barney? Barney in his dinosaur costume, give him the Medal of Freedom. These are all ideas. And you know what? If we're giving the Medal of Freedom just to troll people at this point, I'll volunteer to take. I'll take one. You can give one to me. I'm at least as deserving as Bill Nye. Here's my proposal to the Trump team. Give me a Medal of Freedom, but make it clear it's specifically for my contributions to dei. And I'll wear the man Bug bun wig for the ceremony and everything. Because the Medal of Freedom means absolutely nothing now. So you just use it to troll your political opponents. That's my thing. That's my specialty. So just an idea. Just throwing it out there. Just throwing it out there. All right, let's go all the way back to two weeks ago. This is one of the many stories we haven't had a chance to talk about because we haven't been on air. So it was right before Christmas the Biden administration announced that they were commuting the death sentences of almost every inmate on federal death row. Almost every inmate, New York Post reports, or reported at the time. They said. This was a couple weeks ago. President Biden on Monday commuted the sentences of 37 of the 40 men on federal death row, a list that includes at least five child killers and several mass murderers, while leaving out three notorious fiends in the stunning act of clemency. Just two days before Christmas, Biden, 82, gave the reprieve to some of the nation's most violent murderers, nine of them found too dangerous to live after butchering fellow inmates as part of his effort at ensuring a fair and effective justice system. Make no mistake, I condemn these murderers, grieve for the victims of their despicable acts, and ache for all the families who have suffered unimaginable and irreparable loss Biden said in a statement. But guided by my conscience and my experience as a public defender, chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, vice president, now President, I am more convinced than ever that we must stop the use of the death penalty at the federal level. In good conscience, I cannot stand back and let a new administration resume executions that I halted. Biden, who opposed the death penalty, lowered each of the 37 sentences to life in prison without parole. The three men on federal death row who did not get a commutation were Boston Marathon bomber Zokar Tsarnaev. Dzhokar, however you pronounce it, of course, killed three people in the Boston Marathon bombing 2013. Robert Bowers, who killed 11 at a Pittsburgh synagogue in 2018, and of course, Dylann Roof, who killed nine black Charleston churchgoers in 2015. Among those getting some holiday cheer is Thomas Sanders, who in 2010 kidnapped and then shot 12 year old Lexus Roberts four times and cut her throat in Louisiana days after the girl watched as Sanders murdered her mother on a road trip near the Grand Canyon. Also, there's Anthony Battle, who murdered an Atlanta prison guard with a Hammer in 1994 while serving a life sentence for raping and murdering his wife. There was another guy, Jorge Avila Torres, who sexually assaulted and stabbed to death two girls, 8 and 9 years old, Laura Hobbs and Crystal Tobias. Four years later, he strangled Naval Officer Amanda Snell inside her barrack in Arlington, Virginia. There's also Caboni Savage was convicted of committing or ordering the deaths of 12 people, including four children, as a drug dealer in Philadelphia. So, and that's, you know, that's just a say. It's like three or four of the, whatever it was, 39 people who've had their death sentences commuted. So this is a horrific injustice. Obviously, all of these people deserve to die for their crimes. Biden is giving a giant middle finger to the families of these victims, many of whom were children. The fact that he did it right before Christmas just makes it all the more despicable. I mean, this guy is just a soulless, rotten hunk of flesh at this point, just a deeply evil person. And that's very clear. That's undeniable. What I want to talk about instead is the incoherence of this. Right? It's totally incoherent. The leftist position on the death penalty, along with being morally vacuous, is logically absurd. It doesn't even make any sense. So let's just start with the fact that this commutation, this magical get out of the death chamber free card was Granted to everyone but three. Why is that? I mean, in his explanation of this, he said he doesn't believe in the death penalty and that the federal government should not be executing anybody. But you're still gonna execute three people. I mean, how can you wave this magic wand that grants mercy and clemency to all of these scumbags? But three? The three who still have to die, apparently, are, as we just said, the mass shooters who shot up the black church in Charleston, the synagogue shooter, and then also the Boston bomber. Now, yes, these are all terrible people. These are all evil monsters. They all deserve to die. Absolutely. But are they worse than a guy who murdered or ordered the deaths of 12 people, including kids? Are they worse than child rapists who kidnapped, raped, and killed children? I mean, the one guy I mentioned, he kidnapped these two young girls off their bikes in the neighborhood and raped and murdered them. Really, he's. These other guys who are. Who are still have to die, they're that much worse. They're, like, categorically worse than a child rapist and murderer. Really? KABONI Savage killed 12 people. Dylann Roof killed nine. But Savage won't be executed, and Dylann Roof will. Why? I mean, really, why? There's no explanation. That's what's so incredible about this. No explanation was given, just randomly said? Well, yeah, not these three. Imagine being those three guys on Federal Day. You know, someone walks in and says, hey, all you guys, you're not gonna be executed. You all get to leave death row. Except for you three. No, you're staying. Sorry. Not that I feel sorry for them. I mean, it's like I said, they deserve. They should be executed already. My only problem with Dylann Roof, with the treatment of Dylann Roof and the synagogue shooter and the Boston Marathon bomber, my only problem with their treatment is that they're still alive. They should have been executed a long time ago, but same for all these other people. It's so arbitrary. So going back to this again. This guy killed 12 people. Dylann Roof killed nine. The other guy won't be executed in Roof will. Why? Is it because Roof's victims were black? Is it more evil to kill black people than people of other races? Well, this guy was a drug dealer. How many of his victims were black? Probably like all of them in any way. Why does that matter? Why does the race of the victim matter in the first place? Now, I'm being intentionally obtuse here. I know why. I know what's going on. I'm just pointing out the logical absurdity of this. What about the synagogue shooter? He still has to die, but the guy who abducted and sexually assaulted and then stabbed to death children doesn't. Why is shooting up a synagogue worse than raping and killing children? Biden seems to think that one is again, not just worse, but like categorically worse. I don't, I don't see, I, I don't see how you rank it. I think you get to a point where you have people who are so monstrous and they've done things that are so hideously awful that there's no way of ranking it now. It's just, it's. These are all people, everybody on federal death row. These are all people who have done the worst possible things that a human being can do in this life. And to get into a game of, well, yeah, this was a little worse than that one. It doesn't make any sense. And one other point about this, speaking of incoherence, I seem to recall about a month long period where many on the left and even some on the right, as embarrassing as that is to admit, were simping and fawning over a guy who executed another guy on the street. And now many of those same people, the same people who were overjoyed by a healthcare CEO getting shot in the back and killed, killed. Those same people are also praising Biden for letting 37 killers and child rapists off of death row, claiming that the death penalty is evil and we have no right to kill anyone, no matter how bad they are, except for the healthcare CEO. Really. So the position that these people seem to hold. And it's not just a few people. It's not just a few. This isn't like some straw man based on a few extremists. This is like millions of people on the left seem to believe that the death penalty is an abject evil and totally unacceptable unless it's carried out extrajudicially by a psychotic criminal against a citizen who has not been convicted or even charged with any crime. That's the one kind of the death penalty that they support. The only kind of death penalty they don't support is the kind where someone is actually convicted of a crime and you know, it's been proven that they killed other people. So arresting, charging, convicting and executing a man who kidnapped, raped and killed children is wrong. But shooting and killing a man who ran a health insurance company is right. This is their position. Again, this is the position of like millions of people on the. It's not just a few. This is what they think. And by the way, that's to say nothing of the fact that they also support the death penalty for 60 million unborn babies and counting. So the two kinds of death penalty they support is if it's some schizophrenic whack job shooting a guy in the back on the street, they support that. Or if you are killing a baby when they're still in the womb. So those are the two good ones. That's the good death penalty. The bad death penalty is when you're charging and convicting a child rapist and child killer and executing him for his crimes. That's the bad kind of death penalty. I mean, it's just. How do you share a country with people that think this way? You can't. I mean, you can't share a country with people like this. You certainly can't have any kind of national unity. I don't want to be unified with people like that. I don't want to share a country with them. I don't want to know them, I don't want to talk to them. If that's your view, if you look at it like that, where you care more about sparing the life of a child rapist than about sparing the life of actual children or like a CEO of a company, if that's your view, we got nothing to talk about. I don't want to debate you. I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to be around you. Because that's not just intellectual confusion, although it is that, but it's also a deep moral failing on your part. You're just like a bad person deep down at your core. And unfortunately I think that describes a lot of people on that particular side of the political divide. Okay, let's talk about a controversy a little bit less, slightly less serious, but still, still serious. So this is a video that's gone viral. There's been a lot of conversation about it, a lot of debates. You know, I did google this to see if there's been some news coverage of this event. Cuz I want to be sure, like it's, it's possible that this isn't even real. Maybe it's some weird skit or something. Possible. But the conversation around it is still real and I think it's legit. I mean, it's great acting if it's not. I mean this is very good acting if somebody, if this is some TikTok thing. Anyway, so the video apparently is a delivery driver doordash or Uber eats one of those two, who I assume frantically Asks a customer if he can come in and use her bathroom. You know, delivered the food, and he wants to use her bathroom, and she turns him away. And so it's become a debate online. People are saying. There are some people saying, well, like, what do you do in this situation? Someone's a stranger. They're delivering your food, they want to use your bathroom. Do you let them in? Some people think that the customer is being very mean here. And so we'll play it and you tell me what you think. Here it is. We can't answer the door right now, but if you'd like to leave a message, you can do it now. Hi. I have diarrhea. Please let me use your bathroom. Please, please, please. I'm going. No, no. I'm going to. Get out of my house.

Unnamed Delivery Driver (38:25)

I'm going to.

Matt Walsh (38:25)

Honey, please, please get out. I'm going to. I'm going to. Please. I'm out of my house. You're scaring my children. Get out of my house. All right, so he's kicked out. Then, oddly enough, he kind of walks away. He walks away suspiciously slowly, because I think maybe at that point, I think it had become a moot point. At that point, there was nowhere to run to. So I have to tell you, I'm surprised this is even a conversation as important as it is, because for me, this would be the easiest no in the history of no's. You're a stranger screaming like a maniac and asking to unleash a torrent of diarrhea in my bathroom. And you want to do that while I try to eat the food that you delivered to me, no less. There is no part of that proposal that I would find appealing. That's a lose, lose, lose scenario. So, no. Now, of course, the main reason you shouldn't let a stranger in your house under these circumstances is that there's a decent chance that they don't have to use the bathroom at all. And this could be a ruse to get into your house so that they can then rob you. Or worse. Although, to be honest, I'm not sure if getting robbed is worse than having a stranger blow up my bathroom. I might actually be relieved if my wife and kids weren't there and for some reason, I let the stranger in and then he just robbed me and he didn't use my bath. I think I might actually be a little bit relieved. I'd say you're just going to rob me. Well, thank God. Just don't, don't on anything, please, and then we'll be fine. This is partly the sad result of living in a low trust society. Maybe in a different time and place, maybe you consider letting a stranger use your bathroom. Now, if he's acting like that, no, it doesn't matter. I don't care what time and place you're living in, that's a no. But if he's outright telling you that he's going to go number two, I mean, I don't want to get too graphic about it, but like, just strategically, if you have to use someone, some stranger's bathroom, don't tell. That's too much information off the bat. You could just ask to use the bathroom and you let there be some mystery about what you're gonna do in there. But I'm saying in a different society, if he was polite and normal and just asked that question, maybe in a different time and place, in a different culture, you would say yes. But these days, no. I mean, you have to deal with reality as it is. And this is, you know, there's many versions of this kind of thing. It wasn't all that long. A few months ago, maybe I was at a gas station and I had a guy walk up to me. And you know, people walk. Especially if you live around a city, people walk up to your gas stations all the time and ask for money. But in this case, he asked me to give him a ride a few miles down the road to his house or something. He had some story in, a whole sob story. And you know what? Maybe it was true. Like, maybe he just needed a ride. Maybe this was a guy that just, you know, I think he said his car broke down or something, whatever. And it's possible, it's possible that all that was true. But these days, sorry, can't do it. I, you know, I have a wife and kids at home. I'm not gonna risk getting like carjacked or murdered by some guy because I can't do it. You know, it's just. Cannot do it. Not, no way, not gonna do it. Not gonna risk that. And it's a shame. I wish we could be more trusting. Anyone in the baby boomer generation, you know, remembers a time when picking up hitchhikers was kind of a normal thing to do. If you wanted to ride, you would just stand on the side of the road and put your thumb up and ask for a ride. There was a time when that was a normal thing these days. No way in hell, no way. Just not gonna do it. Not gonna pull over and pick up some random person. Can't do it. If I'M gonna get murdered by a vagrant. It's possible. Could happen to me, could happen to anybody. But I'm gonna make it a little bit harder on you. It's not gonna be because I invited you into my house or into my car. That's not gonna be. I'm not going out like that. So, you know, they're gonna have to earn it. If a vagrant wants to kill me, I'm gonna make you earn it a little bit more than that. And that's the way it is now. And you know the worst thing about it, though? The worst thing about this particular story is that with the insane system that these delivery companies have, it means that that woman already tipped the guy before he showed up like a madman, demanding to spray diarrhea all over her house. She probably already gave him, like, a 20% tip, which is a whole other problem. But we could talk about some other time. Kick off 2025 with 25% off your new Daily Wire plus annual membership. This year will be one for the history books. In just 14 days, Donald Trump will be inaugurated, and the Daily Wire will be there, bringing you live, uncensored coverage of every monumental moment. But while we celebrate victories ahead, we can never forget the fight continues. 2025 reminded us of that fight in its very first hours, with terrorism striking New Orleans and a cybertruck exploding outside the Trump Hotel in Las Vegas. The bad guys don't rest, and neither do we. The battle for truth, justice, and clarity is ongoing, and we're on the front lines every single day to bring you the facts. But we can't do it without you. Join us now and get 25% off your new Daily Wire plus annual membership. Every dollar you spend fuels our mission. Go to DailyWire.com subscribe and get 25% off your new Daily Wire plus annual membership today. Now let's get to our daily cancellation. You know, when a man becomes a father, he's called upon to make sacrifices for his family. And often these will be small sacrifices. Sometimes they'll be larger, though more significant. And on even rarer occasion, the duties of fatherhood will require him to make the kind of sacrifice that, up to that moment, he would have thought himself incapable of making. These are the moments when a man must become a hero and when he must lay his very life on the line. And this may take many forms. Perhaps he's rushing into a burning building to rescue his child from the fire. Perhaps he has to pull his loved one away from the path of a speeding train because they've been tied to the tracks by bandits or whatever. Or most harrowing of all, he may be compelled by his paternal obligations to go to a movie theater and watch sonic the hedgehog 3. Now, a man in that situation would, of course, much prefer to be engulfed in flames or hit by a speeding train, but that would be the coward's way out. He endures sonic the Hedgehog 3 for the sake of his children, whom he loves, and over Christmas break, that is precisely the situation that I found myself in. Now, for the record, I'll say I greatly enjoyed most of the time that I spent with my wife and kids these past two weeks. We had a lot of fun together. We played football, we played outside, we shot BB guns, we played card games and board games. I completely wrecked my whole family in Monopoly. Two nights in a row wasn't even close. We took the kids ice skating. I was ice skating. My wife and kids were left dumbstruck by my gracefulness and elegance on the ice. They didn't say that, but I know they were thinking it. These were all wonderful experiences. Yet things took a rather distressing turn on the final Thursday of the break when my 8 year old son and 5 year old daughter asked me to take them to go see sonic the Hedgehog 3. And I did. God help me. God help me, I did. Now, before I offer my brief review of this thing that I hesitate to call a film, I must first acknowledge in all fairness, I never saw Sonic the Hedgehog 1 or Sonic the Hedgehog 2. It's possible that one cannot fully appreciate the narrative complexities of sonic the Hedgehog 3 without having seen the first two chapters in this epic hedgehog saga. Maybe the other two movies are works of staggering artistic genius that would elevate the third installment and lend it the sort of context necessary for me to have appreciated it and enjoyed it, instead of feeling like I was being waterboarded with high fructose corn syrup the whole time, but I doubt it. I mean, this is the kind of movie where Jim Carrey plays two characters. One is the evil villain and the other is the evil villain's evil grandfather in old age makeup, and the two break into an impromptu dance routine that makes no narrative sense but lasts approximately 87 minutes. It's the kind of movie where those same characters before the dance routine actually look directly into the camera and explain that they're being played by the same actor. I must assume, and I think assume safely, that there is nothing in the other two films that would make this one any less obnoxious or horrifically stupid. Now, I'm not gonna bother explaining the plot of this film in any detail. I wasn't tracking it that closely, to be honest. I was mostly fighting to stay awake. This is the kind of movie that bores you to the point of putting you to sleep, but also annoys you at the same time. It's kind of an odd combination to be both sleepy and deeply irritated simultaneously. As for the plot, I can only tell you that Sonic is the good hedgehog, which you may know. There's also an evil hedgehog voiced by Keanu Reeves, who. And I like Keanu Reeves, by the way. But like every other voice actor in this film and most voice actors in most children's films that have been for the past 20 years, he has no talent as a voice actor and doesn't understand how to act with just your voice. But he's famous, so that's good enough, I suppose. So Sonic has to stop the evil hedgehog and his evil cohorts. That's the Jim Carrey dancing duo I mentioned earlier, from blowing up the world with a big laser. And you know, this has been the evil plan of every evil villain in every blockbuster franchise film for the past three decades. It's a formula that this movie is not interested in deviating from. This is not the sort of movie that deviates from formulas. Now, if you're wondering why the evil hedgehog and the two Jim Carreys want to explode the world and murder 8 billion people in a cosmic blast that they will also die in, it's because the older Jim Carrey's granddaughter, I think, was killed and now he wants to commit murder suicide because life isn't worth living, like that's real. That's in the movie. He actually declares his suicidal intention as well. Now, if that seems like weirdly bleak and dark for a kid's movie where the characters bust out impromptu dance routines and randomly break the fourth wall and constantly speak in Internet lingo from 2019, there's a lot of that, by the way, just as one example, at one point Jim Carrey says, damn you, Autocorrect. If it seems weirdly bleak and dark for that kind of movie, it's because it is. This is a movie, like so many kids movies these days, that schizophrenically darts back and forth from being ironic to painfully self serious to goofy to earnest, and so on and so on. It doesn't try to smooth over these tonal transitions with good writing or performances. The writing is just, just terrible. And the performances are atrocious across the board. Instead, it just flings it all against the wall haphazardly. Because these are all bullet points that the movie studio knows it has to hit. Because this movie, again, like so many kids movies these days, is not the fulfillment of anyone's creative vision. It is just the product of a corporate algorithm. It is loud and ugly and obnoxious and disjointed because nobody who made the film actually cared about making a good film. And they have absolutely no respect for their audience. I mean, this movie could have been made by AI. This is. We are at a point, if they start making movies with AI, we would not know the difference because they've effectively been doing that for 20 years now. Now, you might respond here, as many people on Twitter did, after I gave a very brief review of this film in a tweet on the site a few days ago. You might respond that, well, this movie isn't for me. It's for kids. Well, first of all, tell that to the other people in the theater with us. I could tell you that my kids were by far the youngest people in attendance. There were multiple groups of adults. Just adults, no kids. Whole groups of them who bought tickets to sonic the hedgehog 3. Also tell it to the multiple grown adults who got angry at me on Twitter for not liking the movie. The funny thing is that a lot of those same people say, well, it's not for you, it's for kids. Why are you getting so upset about it then? Why are you tearfully defending a movie that you claim is not for you either? In fact, one person told me that my negative comments had upset, and I'm repeating this phrase verbatim, had upset the quote, sonic community. Now, those are not kids who identify themselves as members of the sonic community. My 8 year old loves Sonic, but he's not on Twitter furiously defending the Sonic community from its detractors. So I agree these kinds of movies are for kids, but I am not the one who needs to be told that. Okay? Second, and this is most important, and it shouldn't need to be explained, but really it does. And that's really my only point here. It is possible to make a children's movie that, although it's for children, is still a good, high quality piece of art. I don't hate children's movies just because they're for children. Quite the opposite. As a father of six, I've watched many, many children's movies. Okay, I've watched way more than the average person. Cause I have so many kids And I greatly appreciate the good ones. A few nights ago, just as an example, we watched the movie Iron Giant with my kids. And that's an animated children's film. It's also well written, beautifully illustrated, brilliantly performed, tonally consistent. It's funny and heartwarming, and at points it's sad. But it works all of that in a way that feels natural to the story. It's a children's film. And it's also a great film, one that I can watch and also enjoy. Because, as it turns out, children's movies are not just for children, they're for parents too. Or at least they should be. If a kid's movie or kids show is so grating and so dumb and so unpleasant that parents can't stand to be in the same room while it's on, that doesn't mean it's for kids. It isn't for kids. It isn't for anyone. It's just bad. And the fact that people say, well, of course it's bad. It's for kids. Tells you everything you need to know about our culture. They act like it's ridiculous to expect the content produced for kids to be high quality or to have any artistic merit whatsoever. But I tend to think exactly the opposite. I think content produced for kids should especially be high quality and should especially have artistic merit. Which is why I hated sonic the Hedgehog 3 and why it is today, I must say, sadly, canceled. That'll do it for the show today. Thanks for watching. Thanks for listening. Have a great day. Godspeed. It.