Inside the Minds of Andy and Jacqueline Elliott

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Mello Millionaire with Tommy Mello

Episode: Inside the Minds of Andy and Jacqueline Elliott
Date: October 31, 2025

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Overview:

In this powerhouse episode, Tommy Mello sits down with Andy Elliott (founder of The Elliott Group) and his wife and business partner, Jacqueline Elliott. The conversation dives deep into elite performance, the evolution from sales domination to holistic people development, family integration in business, leadership, work-life balance, and what it truly means to build and sustain excellence. The Elliotts reveal their philosophy of relentless personal growth and discipline, discuss the role of family in entrepreneurial life, and share actionable insights and raw stories about overcoming adversity, sustaining momentum, and leading teams to greatness.

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Main Themes and Key Discussion Points

1. From Sales Domination to People Development

• Andy and Jacqueline’s background: Andy was a dominant force in automotive sales—holding record-breaking numbers—before pivoting into sales and leadership training with Jacqueline.
• Evolution of focus:
  • Started by teaching salespeople to make more money, but realized many struggled with fulfillment, addiction, poor family relationships, and personal discipline (04:00–04:46).
  • Expanded coaching to “sustainable success”: mind, body, faith, family, finance.
• Notable quote:

  “We can’t teach other people to have what we’re not.” —Andy Elliott (00:49)

2. The Importance of Total Transformation and Stretching Yourself

• The Elliotts practice and preach radical self-reinvention:
  • “We’re constantly trying to stretch people to become better versions of themselves. That’s what we’re here for.” —Jacqueline Elliott (05:41)
  • Reinvention is key not just for individuals but also for marriage and leadership (27:23–28:06).
• Personal anecdotes:
  • Andy discusses his personal transformation, physically and mentally—recalling past photos and how reinvention changed his life and business.
• Memorable moment:
  • Jackie grabbing Andy's "love handle" as a symbol of transformative accountability and change (05:35–05:39).

3. Family Integration and Redefining Work-Life Balance

• Rejecting the “sacrifice” myth:
  • “We don’t try to separate our family from our business. We bring our kids along because we want to teach them what we’re doing…” —Jacqueline Elliott (07:41–08:33).
  • Elliotts travel extensively for events but involve their children, treating business as a family endeavor.
  • Emphasis on being intentional with both work and family time.
• Notable quote:

  “You want to be good, you want to be great, or you want to be the goat? You gotta decide.” —Andy Elliott (00:00, repeated at 07:14)
  “We believe we can have it all.” —Jacqueline Elliott (08:23)

4. Discipline, Delegation, and Building a Scalable Business

• Moving from operator to owner:
  • Elliotts explain the difference between being an operator (doing everything yourself) and being an owner (building teams, delegating, and empowering others) (09:19–10:44).
  • Growing pains as they ordered themselves to let go of control and empower their team.
• Art of delegation:
  • “There’s an art between delegation and dumping…” —Tommy Mello (10:53)
  • Empowering team members, accepting their mistakes, and building leadership within the ranks.
• Culture and work ethic are central:
  • “You can tell how hungry somebody is when they get successful, whether they let off the gas or not.”—Andy Elliott (12:05)

5. Maximizing Time and Focus for High Impact

• Time management myths:
  • Jackie's famous “168 hours a week” breakdown: There’s always enough time if you’re intentional about your priorities (16:33).
  • Most sabotage themselves with wasted time and distractions (17:49).
• Intentionality and focus:
  • “Time isn’t the most important thing in your life. What gets your attention is the most important thing in your life.”—Andy Elliott (19:27)
• Daily routines:
  • The Elliotts structure their days efficiently, reserving blocks for family, work, and personal growth.

6. Accountability, Commitment, and Consistency

• Accountability systems:
  • Accountability primarily to each other—spouses hold each other to a high standard (20:12).
  • Strong advocate for writing down commitments and reviewing them publicly (21:11–21:58).
• Consistency and keeping your word:
  • “Nobody wants to stay in a relationship with somebody that constantly lied to them… If you lie every day to yourself and you don’t do what you say you’re going to do, internally, you don’t like you.” —Andy Elliott (29:07–29:33)
• Leadership failures:
  • Most common: Breaking trust by not keeping your word and failing to make people feel significant and part of the company's future (32:42–33:08).

7. Sustaining Energy, Avoiding Burnout, and Setting Boundaries

• Recharging by design:
  • After a grueling year of travel (200+ days), the Elliotts put in place new boundaries:
    • “One week every month is blocked off. No appointments, no meetings, nothing.” —Andy Elliott (23:51–24:12)
• Saying No:
  • They learned to turn down requests or delegate lower-priority items to protect their energy and focus.

8. Wealth, Legacy, and Living a Rich Life

• Money magnifies who you already are:
  • “We decided to become marriage millionaires. You didn’t have to have any money to do that. You just had to be good to each other.” —Jacqueline Elliott (31:41)
  • Living a rich life is about being proud of yourself as a parent, being close to God, and leading well, not just external wealth (32:11–32:39).
• Focusing on impact vs. just dollars:
  • Compound interest and legacy are valued above simple accumulation.
  • “We don’t make decisions based on money.” —Jacqueline Elliott (35:26)
  • “If we don’t make any more money, even what we’re making now, I’d still want to live this life.” —Andy Elliott (35:40)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• The GOAT Mindset:

  "You want to be good, you want to be great, or you want to be the goat? You gotta decide."
  —Andy Elliott (00:00, 07:14)

• Authenticity in Leadership:

  “We can’t teach other people to have what we’re not. You know, we gotta be real, not frauds.”
  —Andy Elliott (00:49)

• On Sacrifice vs. Integration:

  “A lot of people get confused on what sacrifice really is. I believe in having it all, and we don’t try to separate our family from our business… We’re raising little entrepreneurs.”
  —Jacqueline Elliott (07:41–08:23)

• Reinvention:

  “If Jackie sees the same man show up every day, is she going to fall more in love with me? Reinvention never lets anyone outgrow you...”
  —Andy Elliott (27:23–28:06)

• On Confidence:

  “Confidence is the mental muscle you have to train every day… people can’t make decisions with you if they can’t see that certainty in your eyes.”
  —Andy Elliott (28:06–28:48)

• On Consistency and Self-Betrayal:

  “If you lie every day to yourself and you don’t do what you say you’re going to do, internally, you don’t like you.”
  —Andy Elliott (29:07–29:33)

• Patterns and Cycles in Success:

  “Once I understand if an alcoholic does these things, these patterns and cycles, they can get out of it… If you understand patterns and cycles, that’s how you fix anyone, that’s how you fix any business.”
  —Andy Elliott (29:55–31:21)

• Living a Rich Life:

  “We decided to become marriage millionaires… Living a rich life is this: I want to be a good daddy, I want to be a good husband… That’s me being rich.”
  —Jacqueline & Andy Elliott (31:41–32:39)

• Leaders’ Most Common Failure:

  “By not keeping the word… the circle of trust gets broken.”
  —Jacqueline Elliott (32:42–32:46)

• Game-Changing Advice:

  “Quit trying to please the wrong people.”
  —Jacqueline Elliott (33:46)
  “When I was around the wrong people, I’m gonna do bad things.”
  —Andy Elliott (34:02)

• Stretching Yourself:

  “We find comfort in discomfort. We want to stay uncomfortable because it stretches us to grow.”
  —Jacqueline Elliott (34:12)

• On Personal Development:

  “The greatest gift you can ever give yourself is to just spend time working on you. Your mind isn’t your friend… if you can just spend 30 minutes every day programming yourself first thing in the morning… you’re gonna kill it.”
  —Andy Elliott (37:59–38:40)

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Important Timestamps

• Opening—GOAT Mindset (00:00–00:20)
• The Elliott Journey and Pivot to People Development (03:02–04:25)
• On Total Transformation & Marriage Performance (05:29–06:04)
• Family Integration in Business (07:41–08:33)
• Owner vs. Operator and Delegation (09:19–11:32)
• Intentional Time Management: The 168-Hours Rule (16:33–17:32)
• The Power of Accountability and Commitment (20:01–21:58)
• Blocking Time to Recharge (23:28–24:12)
• Consistent Reinvention (27:23–28:06)
• On Confidence (28:06–28:55)
• Patterns, Cycles, and Habit Change (29:55–31:21)
• Living a Rich Life (31:41–32:39)
• Most Common Leadership Fails (32:42–33:08)
• Biggest Lessons from Their 20s (33:46–34:53)
• Personal Growth as a Daily Practice (37:59–38:40)

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Tone and Style

The episode exudes high energy, directness, tough love, and a blend of raw honesty with encouragement. The Elliotts are no-nonsense about discipline, authenticity, faith, self-reinvention, and the power of relentless personal growth, and they consistently stress practical, actionable habits.

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Highlights for Action

• Decide whether you want to be good, great, or legendary (“the GOAT”).
• Integrate family with business; don’t buy into the separation myth.
• Invest more in who you become than just what you achieve—or what you earn.
• Time is abundant if you are intentional and focus on priorities.
• Reinvent yourself daily; don’t let anyone, including your partner, outgrow you.
• Lead with trust, empower your team, and be prepared for (and tolerant of) mistakes.
• Program your mind every morning—personal development isn’t optional.

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Closing Thought

As Andy puts it:

“The greatest gift you can ever give yourself is to just spend time working on you… No one’s going to do it for you. You gotta make the time to do it.” (37:59–39:08)

Transcript

[A]

You want to be good, you want to be great, or you want to be the goat? You got to decide. And I told Jackie, we're after the goat trophy, and the goat trophy is just built different. You know what I mean? Like, over my dead body am I going to die without changing hundreds of millions of lives. And I know she's a big part of that, too. I think that's why we were born. It's our ministry, bro.

[B]

Introspective, passionate, cutthroat. Our guest today is one of the most dynamic performance coaches in the world.

[A]

Turn your wounds into your weapons.

[B]

Andy Elliot is the founder and CEO of the Elliott Group, a top growing sales and leadership training company.

[A]

I need to make sure I wear my heart on my sleeve because I really care about people.

[B]

After more than two decades dominating the automotive industry, Andy built a company to train millions of professionals and transform how people sell lead and win.

[A]

We can't teach other people to have what we're not. You know, we got to be real, not frauds.

[B]

From Scottsdale, Arizona, Andy's coaching elite athletes, CEOs, and top performers to reach levels they never thought possible.

[A]

Ground and tell the truth.

[B]

Get ready. This episode today will change the way you think about your mindset and leadership skills.

[C]

All right, guys, welcome back to the Mellow Millionaire. Today I got Andy Elliott and Jacqueline Elliott. The Elliott Army. I'm part of the Army. I don't have my thing with me, but they inducted me into the hall of Fame.

[A]

He's one of us. We're one of you.

[C]

And, well, it's a pleasure. You guys were in Vegas right now?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You guys are in here for some huge event with Russell Brunson and his. His amigos and Tony Robbins. Yeah, I was in here for Ryan, and you guys are about as busy as me. If not busy. You guys are traveling more probably. I'm just busy, like, with my head down. Like. You guys are amazing. I see you guys all over the planet, and you bring the family with you a lot. You bring the whole army with you.

[A]

But yeah.

[C]

How often you guys travel?

[D]

It depends on when you ask. For this year, we haven't really traveled much, but, I mean, we just started the year, but, I mean, there was. We counted. What was last year, the year before, we traveled, like, 200 days. It was insane.

[C]

200 days?

[A]

Yeah. So we're in Vegas now. Our team's here. We go back home. We fly out to Miami on Monday. We go to Miami for a week. We're taking our kids with us. We rock a big Event down in Miami. And then, you know, we come back, we got the Dean and Tony deal in Scottsdale, and then we fly to Dubai.

[C]

You guys both seem like you started out, and I got the accolades here, and I don't need these, but, you know, 19 top car salesmen in the state hold a sales record for the most money ever made by a car salesman in a month and a year. 74,500, 715,000. You know, three kids. Obviously, you started out, it was sales training, and then at some point, it pivoted not just to sales. Mind, body, soul, faith. Where are we at now? When you say Andy's coming to Dubai and Andy, Jacqueline, the whole team, what is that? What is the message they're waiting for? Is it discipline?

[A]

I think from 18 to 39 was. Andy Elliott was an automotive guy. Right.

[D]

So in November, it was all sales, I think.

[A]

Yeah. So November of 2019, we pivoted out of the automotive industry as a W2 employee to train the automotive industry, and we rocked that for two years, and we really niched down.

[C]

And this was. You guys are doing crazy youtubes.

[A]

Yeah. And we just took over the automotive industry. So basically, from 2019 to 2021, we dominated, destroyed, and crushed the automotive industry. That'd be like you crushing garage doors. Right? That's what, you know, that's your niche. You're like, dude, if I'm gonna something out, I'm gonna take down some garage doors. Right? And then you. I've noticed lately, like, you've even pivoted from garage doors to some other products and some other things, and now you're in other businesses. And just like you did with all of that stuff, I. Every time I talk to somebody, like, yeah, Tommy, invest in my business, he's doing this. And it ain't garage doors. I mean, you're a businessman now, and you went from garage doors to business, and we went from automotive to business.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And so I would say, honestly, me and Jacqueline are just in the. In the. In. In the people development space now. Yeah, fully. And we understand sales. We understand business because we are business owners. We understand life. You see people with their marriages being torn apart because they want to be successful all around the world being bad parents. Right. I mean, it's just, like, you see these things that are happening, and we've decoded, like, how to be successful because we had to screw it all up.

[D]

Well, sustainable success. I mean, we started by training people how to sell and make money, but we saw a lot of people were lost and they really weren't keeping the money. They were still cheating on their wives. They were still having bad, you know, their bad. Not the best parents. They were just lost, like addictions, a lot of things that were going on. So we started, you know, focusing on people just in general.

[A]

Yeah, a lot of people don't like themselves. Do you remember. Do you remember when me and you got together and, you know, like, nobody would believe it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But like, this is where, like, I almost like, sometimes like to pull pictures up. Yeah, you were very successful. You were making a lot of money in those things. But, dude, there was another man in there and. And I was like, dude, I was like. And by the way, it had nothing to do with money though. No notice. I. I never once told you I help you make more money. I would be a fool for doing that. You were going to do that regardless. But I said, dude, there is a leader inside of you that I promise you, if he comes out, he's going to freaking rock the world. And. And so that's really the space that we've gone into, is making people their most dangerous elite self ever, dude. And we're passionate as hell about doing.

[D]

Stretching people because we've stretched ourselves. Like, you're probably going to pull out pictures of Andy the way he looked before.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

And then I grabbed him by the love handle and all of a sudden.

[A]

He hated that guy.

[D]

You know, that guy was lost.

[A]

That guy was a loser.

[D]

That's the stuff that we're. We're totally in the total transformation in recreating stage of our lives. So we're constantly trying to stretch people to become better, better versions of themselves. And that's what we're here and going back to, like Dubai, you know, we shot content for years for free. Like, we really want to go bring the kids with us and show them, like, hey, this is how you start a business. This is how you get going. This is how, like they have to live that.

[A]

If people think I got lucky, wait till they're about to see what's going to happen.

[C]

Yeah, no, I love it. So 200 days out of 365, I guess 366 last year.

[D]

That's not all. That's not what we plan on doing, like obviously forever. But that was.

[A]

That was what we needed to do to build our brand. There's a. There's a season for certain things, being in the field with your men to get them ready. So, you know, like that. That was our season.

[C]

I mean, though, if you build in Dubai, you Get into Australia, you become a legend in Europe, and you start going, obviously, England, France, Italy, Greece and the whole thing. And then all of a sudden, Asia's not off the table. It starts to become. And then there's a bigger purpose because you're. You're. It's kind of addicting. Like, it's addicting when you help others. It's like Zig Ziglar once said, you could have anything you want in life if you help enough people get what they want.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

But you also have three kids that depend on you and a family that you need to raise. Where do you draw the line? Because I see last year you both were like, next year did head focus, head down Fountain Hills. We're not. We're not. But you still going to do events, and I know that you're going to go to Miami, you're going to go to Vegas. How do you. How do you balance that? Because I'm. I'm asking selfishly. Okay, can I.

[A]

Can I. Can I answer then? I'm going to let her answer.

[C]

Yeah, I'm going to let you guys answer. I'm not.

[A]

Well, no, because. Because here's the deal. You want to be good? You want to be great, or you want to be the goat? You got to. You got to decide. And I told Jackie we're after the goat trophy, and the goat trophy is just built different. You know what I mean? Like, over my dead body am I going to die without changing hundreds of millions of lives. And I know she's a big part of that, too. I think that's why we were born. It's our ministry, bro.

[C]

Yep. So you're willing to. There's obviously discipline, sacrifice that comes along with that.

[D]

Well, I think a lot of people get really confused on what sacrifice really is. I believe in having it all, and we don't try to separate our family from our business. I think a lot of people, when they achieve success, quote, unquote success, or they make money, they believe in separating family from business and all of that. We bring our kids along with us because we want to teach them what we're doing, and they find value and become better kids because of it. We. We're raising little entrepreneurs, so we don't try to separate that, you know? And of course, we have our time. We're like, hey, phones aside, we're going to spend some family time. That's. That's always important. And we believe we can. We can have it all. But I think a lot of stress comes into families when they teach when they think that society teaches them like, hey, family and business are different, are separated. With us, it all runs together. And the kids know that, hey, we're out to change the world. And you guys are a huge part of it.

[C]

I love that.

[A]

Yeah. You know, Tommy, what are you after an easier life or do you want to. You want to make the history books?

[C]

Yeah, you know, the, the deal, the idea of discipline. I put, you know, can I put you guys and listen, I put you in the realm of the ultimate sales a little bit in the discipline side of like the David Goggins, but two separate. Like, not this idea, though, but at the same time, I think you guys really enjoy working out. You enjoy the, like the lift and the pumpkin and your team does, and you're getting them like, you watch the way they smile. Some of the people on your team would be still looking down, not making eye contact, not being, you know, stuttering all over the place just because they didn't believe in themselves. So I guess it's the idea of getting addicted to changing lives is what you guys have been just. Yeah.

[A]

And this and the sales space. I mean. Okay, so we are a sales company, right? Our company, sales. We. We built a nine figure business through sales. If anybody would train on sales, it's like what we live. We live sales. But if you want to really own your own business one day, you know, there's a difference between being an operator and an owner. Right, Right. Most people don't know that. Yeah, they're the operator.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And they call themselves the owner. They're. And they're. They're an employee. Me and Jackie are becoming an owner. We are an owner now. We are. That's why we're going to Dubai, is because we own our business. Everyone in our company is set. We don't even have to go into the office. Do we want to go to the office?

[D]

We have to let go of some control in order to get there. Like, you can't.

[A]

This is a big part of this last few years.

[D]

You can have control and grow at the same time. And that was a huge, huge problem for me and him. But mostly me, I think, because I handle a lot of the operations, a lot of handling a lot of things that I wasn't delegating. But in order to grow, I had to learn to delegate. I mean, we talk about climbing a rope. You can't climb the rope without letting go of one hand. You're always going to have to let go. So we've been getting very good at delegating and trusting our team. And when they actually feel empowered and we have the right leaders because they take that on very well and they actually like, surprise us. I used to believe that nobody was going to do the job as good as I did and nobody was going to care as much as I did. And. And they actually do care. We just have to be tolerant as business owners that they're going to make mistakes.

[C]

You, you built your life off of mistakes. You just, you're like, we look at people sometimes, we say, what were you thinking?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Because you already made that mistake.

[D]

Of course.

[C]

And the delegation, there's actually an art between delegation and dumping.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Is a lot of times you're like, if you should call me, but if they learn to rely on you, but let them make their mistakes. I kind of like it when people make mistakes. I'm like, look, we've made that mistake. Just don't do it again. I just had a guy blow 50 grand, made a big mistake. Not the end of the world. I'm like, we learned a lot and it was, was a really important guy in the company. And that's like my job. If I asked you guys right now, I need you guys to 20x next year, 20x, you wouldn't say, Andy and Jackie need to be. Instead of two, you don't have more days, right?

[A]

No.

[C]

So you need to start hiring better and interviewing more, checking references and inspiring more and building the team.

[D]

Right.

[C]

If you build a team 20x, that's a quick 20x. I mean, what's the, what's the other way to do it?

[A]

No, that's the math equation.

[D]

But you're also delegating power, you know, and that's the hardest thing to delegate. Right. Because you're delegating responsibilities that you don't think anybody's equipped to have. But if you're not preparing these people and you're not tolerating, like you said, mistakes, then you're never going to grow. But I think the biggest thing.

[A]

Try to stay in control too.

[D]

Exactly. And a lot of, a lot of times people like, they ask us, like, what, how did you build your, like your leaders? How do you build this culture? And a lot of people are like, hey, culture is the most important thing. I think with me and Andy, it's mostly like work ethics.

[A]

Yeah. You can tell how hungry somebody is when they get successful, whether they let off the gas or not.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, let me ask you this. This is something I've been talking a lot about because I used to work 90 hour weeks and I'm not kidding. I put in more hours.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I was never equated to dollars or success. It wasn't. And I hear like Ed Milette say, dude, I start three days. I work three days. You're working one day. Because I'm working three different shifts. And I'm like, dude, if I out delegate and I want to work out and I want to have a family, I don't have kids yet. And you know, future self and faith. And we talked about a little bit about Travis Hearn, who we'll talk about a little bit. But, you know, I don't equate, man, if I could get to 100 hours, man, I'd be two and a half times more successful than my 40. Because I look at Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, I look at the top, top. I don't even cut to like, ooh, this guy's pretty good. I go straight to the top. Most elite, I think that's the piece is this idea. Because listen, I'm really asking, is it out working?

[A]

No.

[C]

Or is it because I don't think Elon's like putting in, into going to Mars and his Space X. I don't think he's putting in 60 hour weeks into that. Yeah.

[A]

No. People, people trade time for results. That's how money comes. Money comes from results. Like, you don't trade time for money, you trade time for results. Just to be for real. Like me and Jackie, like, I work out every morning. I don't even get into the office most of the time. My, my meetings don't even start in my day until 10 or 11am yeah. Like, you can't get on my schedule before 11. You can't.

[D]

But before it was like we were the first ones there, last ones to leave.

[A]

My kids, I take my kids to school or. I mean, I mean, I'm sorry, I. Kids, a dance class and all that stuff. By, by 4:00', clock, I'm done. But everything in the machine is running.

[D]

But he's working so hard during that time. I think a lot of people think that, you know, time is like, okay, you come in at a certain time and go out. Like, he works efficiency. Exactly well.

[A]

But also, I've been working. I'm 45. I've been working since I was 18. Yeah. For 25 years. I work 19 hours a day. So the idea of it is just like you, you put all that time in and now you're finally getting wiser. You've built enough credibility in the marketplace. You had enough lessons so.

[C]

And I know you guys invest a lot of real estate, and I think it's amazing. And there's tax, there's cool things that you could do with that. I think the smartest people in the world made their money in real estate. But for me, it's going internal rate of return. How many doubles do I have left? Wagon still enjoy them. How many doubles could I double once I get to a billion? So I'm like, probably 12 doubles. If I'm really good, I got 12 doubles left. But do you guys realize if you double a billion or Double a dollar, 12 times what happens goes to 1 to 2, to 4, to 8, to 16, to 32, to 64 to 128. It turns into hundreds and hundreds of billions of dollars. But then I'm like, how many lives can I impact? Don't I got a fiduciary and a mental and a faithful duty to like, make this work? And now I'm not going to be able to impact lives. I don't think as much on stages. Like, you guys have a way of moving people that I've never seen.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

And most of the time, the people that actually make it. So what is it? Is that the idea? You guys are doing marriage counseling in some ways now?

[D]

We do couples masterminds.

[C]

Couples couple masterminds.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But I think the biggest thing is that we, we just value the family.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, at the end of the day, like, anybody that even works for you in your company or that you run into, you're always going to tell them, dude, take care of your family. Oh, yeah, right. Like, I mean, like, I don't know why, but like, that's, but that's not typical for coaching anymore to talk about taking your family.

[C]

What do you, you know as well as I do, what do they say when you're on a plane and the mass drops.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Put it on your butchers on first.

[C]

Put yours on yourself first. And the deal is, you guys want to be so helpful to your families, but you don't. You don't take care of yourself. You're not gonna. You come home and exhausted and you can't. You crack a beer and you're exhausted and, and you eat fast food all day, especially the trades. You know what I mean?

[D]

You're bringing home leftovers.

[C]

Yeah. And that's really tough for a kid to grow up and not have a father or mother figure.

[A]

Watch this. How many boys in this generation right now aren't going through manhood because we're in a fatherless nation. Or we have a bunch of dads that think success is what they need. They need to make money. And they don't take on the responsibility of taking their sons right through boyhood to manhood.

[C]

Yeah, well, that's how the, that's how the generational curse comes.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And so that's why it's hard to get out of that. Well, that.

[A]

Well, that's what we're doing. We're going out there and freaking cracking their heads.

[C]

Dude, I, you know, Jack, one day you said I was creeping on your Instagram and it said 168 hours. And I quote this, I stole it from you. If every, the whole world knows this, I stole it from you. You get 40 hours to, you know, you said 50 hours to work, 50 hours to sleep, 10 hours working out. You still got 60 hours left. And I, I even added that I go, you could take each child on a date, you take your wife on a date. You could watch your favorite show that night. You could read 10 pages of a book and still have 20 hours left. Yeah, it's just this mismanagement of time. I think that's the biggest culprit is this idea of, you don't understand. I don't have any time. But that breakdown you did, I mean, I memorized it 160 hours. I mean, literally, what is it that we do? But we're human beings too. There's got to be some downtime, some kids time, some. Even if you're on and your nutrition is perfect and your T levels are right. Because that's one thing that I needed is to get my levels right. I have a lot of energy, but.

[B]

I still like a little bit of.

[C]

Downtime, a little bit of me time, a little bit of focus. Just think, reflect what could be prayer, could be anything. But I can't go. There's not 168 hours in my week of just full blown capacity. So how do you tell the average person to maximize scheduled time?

[D]

Well, most people, what they do is they're spending time on social media watching other people live their lives, or they're wasting time just trying to keep up with the neighbors or trying to prove to the wrong people that, you know, they, that they have a good life and it's all fake. I mean, that's the truth. So I think a lot of it is just being really intentional with your time. That's what we talk about, like when we're with our kids. And I think like, you give priority to what's important to you in Your life, you'll always find to find time for what you want to do. And I think a lot of times, like, we make excuses or we say, hey, you know what? Like, my family is like, really important, or I work for my family. But those are the people that you take for granted the most, and you don't show them either. So it's like, well, focus.

[A]

Fool can be to distract a genius.

[D]

It's true.

[A]

I'm not very smart, but I kill people for a living.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I'm focused. And. And. And I think that I got our life changed and we built this business really quick. Tommy.

[C]

I know.

[A]

Not because. But not because we were smart, but because me and Jackie really wrote down what was important. We got intentional, and we attacked relentlessly on these things that we wanted to be great at.

[C]

And it's what. Actually, I had a podcast with the number one person on the planet, this psychologist, Daniel Lemkes.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And she said our bodies. It wasn't made to get caffeine or heroin or dopamine is created in the morning, usually by doing really hard things.

[D]

It's a natural way to getting it.

[C]

And this. This discipline creates dopamine, and it creates these things. But what do you think is more important? Focus or discipline or leadership? And I know there's a combination, so.

[A]

I'm going to say this real quick. When you work out really hard in the morning and do hard things, that releases a biological reward in your body. Oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine, and endorphins, they all release. It is crack that your body releases because you do hard things. So that. That's. That also where it. Look, time isn't the most important thing in your life. What gets your attention is the most important thing in your life. And so what gets your attention to me is what you're focusing on. And so if social media gets your attention, you're out.

[C]

I don't even know what you guys want to talk about it, but is there any accountability partners that you keep. What Is it to keep you on track with the workouts? Is it to keep you on track with. Is there anything that ever. You guys are afraid to fall off on?

[A]

I will tell you this. The accountability to me has. My biggest accountability has been number one, her. I have told her who I'm going to be, and she has to hold me.

[D]

She gave me permission to grind him when he got off. And also we've. We've learned that discipline, you know, prevents you from making mistakes. So if you have a routine like you're going to not make as many mistakes. You're not going to veer off. It's like, you know, like, I listened to something like Conor McGregor said a long time ago, and it was like, he's. Like, he never lost a fight because the other fighter was better than him. It was getting off of his routine. Like, he didn't eat right, he didn't sleep right. He didn't do certain things that made the other fighter win. So he always talked about, like, discipline. You know, when you're on your game, when you follow your routine, you're not gonna get veered off. You're not gonna be tempted by making mistakes and eating bad or, you know, not going to the gym or whatever it is.

[C]

So. So this idea of. It's called commitment. And in Robert Cialdini's book Influence, who's the best psychologist of all time?

[D]

I love Robert Cialdini.

[C]

He explained commitment. He said there's three things that need to happen. Number one, it needs to be your commitment. Can't be anybody else's. Can't be your trainers, can't be. Andy's telling me this. It needs to be you come up with your own commitments. You've got to tell me what you want to weigh, how you want to look, what your body fat needs to be. You need to tell me how much you want to make. I can't pick that for you. Number two, it needs to be written down in front of a group. And number three, it needs to be somewhere that we can remind each other every day what we stayed committed to each other. Now you create that every time. Yeah, on social media, but you've got people reminding you every day. Well, what about marriages? Because I think there's a lot of misalignment most times now, you guys are the perfect. You guys both want this. It seems like you're both. You're not living his dream and he's not living yours. It's a combined dream.

[D]

But we came from a lot of shit, too. Like, we are trying to catch up for lost time, you know, I mean, that's just the truth. We're like, I'm 43, he's 45. And you think, like, you're not that old. No, but we feel like we don't have time to waste. Like, we've got our kids, they're watching us. We have people, you know, that are counting us, counting on us everywhere, that we want to make sure that, like, we live up. Live up to what we're preaching.

[A]

Yeah, but also, Tommy, I Want to say something to you. Listen, do you want to be the father, the mother, right, the parent that shows their kids what's possible?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Because at the end of the day, people say, well, yeah, your kids can't live up to your shoes. I never had a leader grown up. You know what it would have been like to have someone in my bloodline to look up to and say, man, I could become that.

[C]

I don't know, 100%. You're right. I mean, I get it.

[A]

There's always going to be a different set of eyes looking at it and be like, oh, you shouldn't have went that hard, dude. Me and Jackie, now that we've we're world.

[B]

So this is.

[C]

Okay, so 45, 43, this is sustainable. Okay? We do this all day. We talk on stages, we do podcasts, we've got it going on. What's the unwind time?

[D]

I mean, I can't tell you really what it is. You know, obviously God only knows how long we're going to have the energy that we have. But right now I can tell you that, like there's nothing that's going to get in our way. And we feel like we have more energy than ever. We feel like we have the health. I mean, we're going to go for it. We're going to go for wherever, I mean, whatever we can get right now. And then our health might change. I mean, a lot of things can happen.

[C]

Only God is there like unwind time though. Every quarter you're like this weekend, three days.

[A]

Dude, check this out, number one. Okay, so that's a great question because so our whole year it was blocked off last year.

[D]

And this year, after the 200 and something travel days, we decided to put something in place for the following year.

[A]

There's a week that's blocked off, one week every month that nothing can get scheduled on. No appointments, no meetings, no nothing.

[C]

Once a month.

[A]

Once a month.

[C]

One week.

[A]

One week. It's blocked off. You can't touch it.

[C]

One week, you can't touch it. We just got one week a month.

[A]

One week every month.

[C]

And this is. You're not going into work.

[A]

We don't go into work. It's blocked off. I'm with my kids, my wife, my family. But we just handed it to our assistant and we said, hey, you see these blocked off times, nothing can happen here.

[C]

It's very hard to say, you know, knowing, saying no is because a lot of people, they don't have bad intentions.

[D]

No.

[C]

And the deal is, is like people will Look, I started work, you know, here's the deal. Today, you think about the meetings, and then, look, I left Phoenix at 2. I will be back in Phoenix at 11. I will be back to bed by 12:30. Yeah, let me start over tomorrow. And it's not even a big deal to me because I'm hanging out with you guys, taking a lot of notes, thinking through a different lens, right? And if this is work, I mean, I don't feel like I ever go to work in a way, but I still got to perform. I still got a schedule. You know what I mean? And it's. It's a lot.

[B]

It's a lot.

[C]

It could be draining. People are like, how do you keep going? And I'm like, dude, we're just getting started.

[D]

Well, you have a lot of energy, but also a question that you have to kind of train yourself. And I think that that's something that we've learned recently is like, can you do it? The answer is yes. Right? Because you're so driven. You have the energy. Yeah. Is. Should I really do this? Like, what is that? What is that?

[C]

What is the litmus test of does any. Or Jackie do it? Or do we delegate it? Or we just say no?

[D]

I mean, we didn't do this before. Obviously. This is something that we've, like, recently gotten good. Gotten good at. You know, we blocked that week out of the month, but we also look at, hey, how many events are we going to plan? Let's say we have one event per. Oh, how many speaking? No matter how many, like, come up later, like, Andy, we need you to speak in such and such. We already have the year pretty much planned out. Our team can handle so much. We've given them so much power. And with us.

[C]

Yeah. Are you ever afraid? Now, here's the question I have for you guys, because you guys. So how do you get over getting burned? Because this is the biggest problem is people lose. They start not trusting, Right? And I'm sure you got the checks and balances, and you'll pop in and still let people know who Big mom and Big Daddy are. But what.

[A]

What.

[D]

What.

[C]

What do you. What do you do when that happens?

[D]

I think a lot of people are scared of being burned, and it prevents them from really going all in and really giving their business and everybody else their best. With Andy and I, yes, of course we've been burned. And people tell us, hey, don't get close to your people because they're gonna take advantage of you or don't share this with them. We're like, you know, we share pretty much everything. I mean, and probably not, as I.

[C]

Say, never let them at your house. I see everybody's at your house every day. I mean, you've let us. Oh, my God, your house.

[D]

Yeah, we're so. We're so open. But I think the best example you can give to your team, though, is when those people do burn you, and by you showing them, like, hey, you know what? I'm still going to be the same person with you no matter what, and I'm not going to let this person affect our relationship. They respect you more.

[C]

What about firing? You guys find it. Who does the firing? When somebody screws up or lets the client down or, like, I'm not good at that. I never wanted to do that.

[A]

Pretty rare.

[D]

It is very rare because, I mean, the people that we have, like, they really do.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

They have great hearts.

[C]

The relationship you've built with them.

[D]

Yeah, exactly. But we do have things now, like, we have scorecards of things that are kept. So it's like, we make sure that they follow a certain data. So we've gotten really data. Yeah, we've gotten very data heavy.

[A]

But we also love everybody's heart. So, like, you know, I'm going to.

[C]

Go through some speed questions, and I'll get you guys out of here. So total recreation. In order to get what you've never had, you have to become someone you've never been. Yeah, let's hear that.

[A]

Well, you got to. You got to reinvent daily. If. If Jackie sees the same man show up every day, you think she's going to fall more in love with me, it's going to stay the same, or she's eventually going to love me less. I mean, what do you think?

[C]

I mean, love you less eventually. If it's mundane, boring, it's the same.

[A]

Gym workout you go in every day. The trainers put you through the same workout every day. You're gonna stop going back. If you quit getting results, you're not gonna go anymore.

[D]

Well, the newness wears off and everything.

[A]

Yeah. So. So me. Reinvention never lets anyone outgrow you. This is a very important thing for a marriage, for a father, and to be a leader and also to prove to yourself what you're made of. The daily art of reinvention and to be reborn is huge.

[C]

I love it. Confidence is the mental muscle you have to train every day. Confidence is the mental muscle you have to train every day.

[D]

Yep.

[A]

Yeah, I believe. Well, I'm. Because I'm in sales, Belief and confidence are the two keys to success. Without those two, you're screwed.

[D]

You are screwed. But I think a lot of, like, confidence, like, comes from within. I remember, like, when Andy and I used to go places before we even had a falling or anybody. Like, we had to really believe in ourselves. And we'd walk places and be like, do I know you from somewhere? I'm like, you don't know us. But, like, they just. We just carry that with us. And I think it comes from believing in yourself.

[A]

So the confidence. People can't make decisions with you if they can't see that certainty in your eyes. And people see people on a soul level.

[D]

Yeah. And confidence without the cockiness. Right. Without arrogance. It's just knowing you're confident within yourself, you know?

[C]

Yeah, it's hard. It's actually hard to see a guy that's been working out a lot without the cockiness. But there's walking in and having an ambiance that I know I love myself and I deserve this. And I've always had this idea of why not me?

[A]

Nobody wants to stay in a relationship with somebody that constantly lied to them. If I lied to you, would you stay in a relationship with me?

[C]

No.

[A]

No. What if you lie every day to yourself and you don't do what you say you're going to do internally, you don't like you. So if you do what you say you're going to do, it'll increase your self belief, self confidence, everything will go through the roof. But if you don't do what you say you're going to do, you're not going to like you and your confidence will never be real.

[D]

You can't lead that way either because people can sniff it, you know.

[A]

Well, again, I can look in your eyes and I can see, like, did you don't keep your word?

[C]

Yeah. No. It's a big deal. And there's a lot of people, they walk in, they're timid, they're eye contact, they don't have it, they don't show up consistently. Consistency, I've talked a lot about, I think discipline beats motivation. And this idea of consistency is tough.

[A]

I was telling Jackie, Tony Robbins, who's like one of the number one, like, psychologists in the world, like, he's super smart, right? Yeah. Like, people try to fix people for five years. Tony fixes them in five minutes. You see it all the time. And Tony always talks about patterns and cycles and he's like, dude, first of all, three things that every person must know, a skill. I was telling her night number one, you got to learn patterns and cycles. Like, you got to learn them. Like you got to understand it. Secondly, you got to be able to use these patterns and cycles that other people have. So, like, if I could watch you use a pattern and cycle to stop being an alcoholic, then I would just learn that you're doing a pattern and cycle. That would be skill one, skill two would be. Then I would do that pattern and cycle. I would learn that pattern in that cycle. Now I'm using it. And then three, I would start to create my own patterns and cycles. Now I'm free. But if you understand patterns and cycles, that's how you fix anyone, that's how you fix any business.

[C]

I wanna, you know, I wanna learn more about that. I've never understood. I've not learned enough about Tony Robbins.

[A]

How do you make a million? If I was to ask you, how do you make a business? This times, this, plus this.

[C]

Yeah. There's a formula. I mean, it's pretty simple.

[A]

Yeah. But once you understand that formula, you can make a million to 100 million. Yeah, 100 million to a billion. And once I understand if an alcoholic does these things, these patterns and cycles, they can get out of it. That guy, the gym, that pattern, that cycle keeps them out of the bar. It keeps that edge, that itch.

[C]

You got to teach this new cycle, this. You're almost changing the habits. You're, you're replacing certain things, broke the.

[A]

Pattern in the cycle that was bad, bad and created a good one. And he won. And now he won't let anybody create the Saturn pattern cycle because he's figured out the formula. He knows his formula.

[C]

What do you mean by getting rich versus living a rich life? And what's the difference?

[D]

Well, in the beginning with us, when we didn't have a dollar, like we decided to become marriage millionaires, you know, we didn't have to have any money to do that. We just had to be good to each other. For example, I believe that a lot of people like money magnifies people, Right? You're a good person with money. You can help a lot of people. That's why you talk to a lot of people, you know, people and give them business advice. But, you know, and it magnifies who they are. And we've taught people how to make money for a long time. Like that's what we're really good at.

[A]

Everybody thinks if you make more money, you're going to be successful. Am I right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How many people right now got hella problems at home and they think if they make more money, it's going to fix it. It's not. It's just going to bury all those problems. The money's going to cover it and those problems are going to come back out one day and everything's going to implode. And the second money stops coming in, guess what? All those problems are coming back up. And so basically what I'm saying is living a rich life is this. I want to be a good daddy, I want to be a good husband. I want to look in the mirror and be proud of me. I want to be close to God. I want to put a financial fence around my family. I want to be a good leader of my team. That's me being rich.

[C]

What are the most common ways leaders fail their teams?

[D]

By not keeping the word.

[A]

Yeah, the circle of trust gets broken.

[C]

Trust.

[A]

Yeah, the circle of trust. Once that gets broken, you're finished. And by the way, not accepting also new ideas in the company from other people. Everybody has to see where they fit in the company. Big picture, significant five years, 10 years from now, 15 years from now, because if not, they're not going to be there.

[D]

Yeah. So it always leave you for somebody.

[A]

Else that makes them feel like they're a part of their picture.

[C]

These are all circumstantial. But, but the deal is, is like, look, at the end of the day, I feel like a lot of leaders that I've seen, they, when they come to this, this real money, they go, sorry, this is mine. My families, I've taken the sacrifice and they said they were going to do this stuff all along, but they never experienced what it's like to give. And then look, I've done the math either way. When you're able to give and create an army behind you, these people are loyal and they'll do whatever. And, but, but you should leave from up front. And you guys do lead up from up front. So give me a game changing piece of advice that each of you wish you would have known in your 20s.

[D]

Quit trying to please the wrong people. I think that was like huge like for us, I think a lot of it, like most of the problems that we've ever had as a, as a couple or even Andy or me as a person is that, you know, we tried to find that significance, you know, in, in the wrong people.

[A]

And I was going to say, same thing that she's saying is basically when I was around the wrong people, I'm gonna do bad things.

[D]

But staying uncomfortable was another big thing.

[A]

I'm just an idiot.

[D]

Staying uncomfortable has been a huge thing for us. Like, we started this whole conversation with, hey, it's. We find comfort in discomfort. Basically. We want to stay uncomfortable because it stretches us to grow. We find fulfillment not by, oh, you. Obviously, gratitude is a huge part of being fulfilled, but it's not it alone. You can't be fulfilled by just being grateful. You're going, like, to us, we're addicted to stretching ourselves by reaching a goal that everybody, like, doubted us for. And all of a sudden we, like, we. We hit it and then it's like, oh, my gosh. Well, now you feel powerful and you feel like, inside another one and another one, another one. It seems like that's where you've reached success as well. And I think a lot of, like, you know, people that have success or, you know, that have built good businesses is because they're addicted to that.

[C]

The field goal always moves. You know, get a billion and that. Most people say that exact same thing. A billion. Here's the problem with 100 million. Here's a problem with a million is most people think about what they're going to do with the money.

[D]

Yeah, exactly.

[C]

And I think that's a mistake. But most losers that win the lottery, they lose all the money because they go, I'm buying this, this, this, this, this, this, this. I think, you know, what I think about now is like, compound interest. How. How do I.

[A]

What.

[C]

What can I do with the compound interest? And then I could do nice things for a lot of people, but if I lose the principal, it's gone.

[D]

One of the things, I think that we made a big decision a long time ago is we don't make decisions based on money. Like, and it's. It's a really hard thing to kind of grasp and understand, but we don't make a decision on how much money we're going to make. We have to feel like that's.

[A]

I think if we don't make any more money, even of what we're making now, I think I would still want to live this life. Yeah, I would. I mean, I just help people for a living. I really do. I'm. I'm finally doing something I love.

[C]

Is there anything coming up that you guys want to discuss? This is not going to come out right away, but is there, like this year something in the summer or fall, like the mega event or.

[A]

No, I mean, we got a big event coming up in April with David Goggins.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

He's going to be here with us in Arizona.

[D]

We have some big things planned, you know.

[A]

Yeah. I love that. Yeah, we want to do things with.

[C]

Like the biggest, the best. Yeah.

[A]

But, you know, like just, just, we just want to be with good people. You know, the main deal is, is that me and Jackie just want to keep, we want to keep growing and we want to keep becoming better people.

[D]

We want to contribute as much as we can to be able to make that connection with people that are lost.

[A]

In a lot of ways for a lot of people. I think 95% of the people in the world are lost.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think we're the comeback kids. And so I think staying out in the public's pretty big deal.

[C]

Yeah, it's a big deal. People need to hear it.

[D]

The coolest thing is like when we have like the 15 year old son that turns his dad onto training or something and they come to an event together and the dad comes up like, Matt, this is amazing. Like I'm a realtor or I do this for a living and my son's been watching your content and got me hooked on this.

[C]

How many people do you think fit the of like that you meet and you get to know them for a while. Was it 20% you went into business with? Is it 30? Is it just.

[A]

I think it's, I think it's 50. 50. But our team does such a good job of vetting people.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[A]

They know like, who me and Jackie are attracted to. Like, they know that we're not too good for anybody. But if you're not coachable, well, they've.

[D]

Seen a lot of the content. They already know that Andy's gonna be hard. They already know that they need to be coachable. They already know what we're looking for.

[C]

And the people I bet you guys have got, you know this and you've seen this a million times. The people that him haul around and they don't dive in and they're like, maybe, maybe, maybe the maybes are the worst. Like a great no, A quick no is respectable, right? Quick yes is like, hell yeah. But maybe is like, dude, don't, don't call us back because they kick you guys around and like your team is very, very outgoing and they, they make the calls. I'm going to let you guys both do whatever you want to. Close a cell.

[A]

No, I just think I'm going to finish with what you said. The quicker that you can make a decision, the quicker you get to success. When you're shorten, when you're, when you shorten your decision making time, you'll be more successful faster. And lastly I think I would say this because you believe in self development. Big time. Yeah. That's how you were built. That's how she was built. That's how I was built. The greatest gift, and I think that we'll finish with this, but the greatest gift you can ever give yourself is to just spend time working on you. I think your mind isn't your friend. And I think if you can just spend 30 minutes every day just programming yourself first thing in the morning, I think you're gonna kill it. I think if you do that for a year, you're gonna have a really big life.

[C]

Programming more than just working out.

[A]

Just spend time working on you. Yeah. This has nothing to do with the gym. This has to do with, like, your brain isn't your friend. It doesn't want you to do big things. You know, the father of lies, which is the devil has brainwashed you to believe that you're not capable of this. I think if you were to listen to, like, a podcast or training or something, plug into it, you start to believe in yourself, you think differently, get in a different state, and then you want to go win. I do it every day still. I've been doing it for five years. So I just think this, that that's the gift. And no one's going to do it for you. You got to make the time to do it.

[C]

So you wake up. That's where you start. You take a shower, you cold plunge. What do you. Where does that start?

[A]

Usually I drink my coffee, I'm reading a book. I'm listening to a book I'm trying to plug into something to get me ready to dominate that day and kill it. And, dude, when I don't do it, I notice a big difference.

[C]

Okay, that's great advice.

[D]

Yeah. So just.

[A]

So just, hey, just try it for 30 days, see how you feel.

[C]

I love that.

[A]

Yeah, I love that. So it's a good. It's a gift.

[C]

Well, you guys are amazing, and it's a hell of a podcast.

[A]

We'll see you back home.

[D]

Thank you so much.

[B]

Thanks so much for listening to this episode, like always. We're gonna close it out with the Tommy Truth, which is a little slice of wisdom from me to you that can help guide you in whatever you're striving towards right now.

[C]

When I started podcast, every single one of the people in my management team said, why are you giving away all of our secrets? I go, well, I'll teach you how to get a six pack, too. It doesn't mean you're going to do it. Everybody knows what they should be doing, but they don't do it. So I don't feel like we're giving away, like, the secret sauce. The secret sauce is we grind, we come in, we work hard, we take care of our clients, and you can tell people that, but it's a different thing from saying and doing, and that's it.

[B]

Guys, we'll talk to you next week.