Podcast
The Men we Are
Hosted by Kieran · EN
The Men We Are is a podcast about meeting ourselves where we actually stand—not where we’re told we should be.
The Men We Are is about support over solutions, honesty over hype, and community over comparison.
By listening to other men’s stories, we begin to accept who we are now, without shame, and soften the disappointment that comes from believing we should be something else.
You’re already good enough; now let’s prove it together!
25episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Why are only men drafted for war?
Mar 2300:27:00Tap to summarizeIn this episode of The Men We Are, we explore the complex and often uncomfortable reality of military conscription and what it reveals about masculinity, equality, and civic duty. Why are men still overwhelmingly expected to fight in war? Is it biology, tradition, or deeply embedded cultural expectations? As global tensions rise from Eastern Europe to the Middle East, we unpack the ethics of the draft, the social contract between citizen and state, and whether true equality means shared responsibility in both peace and conflict. We examine historical roots, modern perspectives, and personal implications, asking a powerful question: what does society really expect from men when it matters most? This thought-provoking episode challenges assumptions and invites a deeper understanding of gender roles in modern life.
Transcribe →The Stoicism trap
Mar 1900:23:16Tap to summarizeWe explore the powerful intersection between ancient philosophy and modern masculinity in this episode, unpacking the true meaning of stoicism and how it applies to men today. Drawing on real-life experiences, we dive into the difference between emotional suppression and emotional regulation, and why confusing the two can impact mental health, relationships, and personal growth. We explore how men are often conditioned to appear strong and composed, yet quietly struggle with anxiety, uncertainty, and isolation. By revisiting authentic stoic principles like self-awareness, resilience, and intentional response, we challenge the idea that strength means silence. This episode offers practical insight into building emotional intelligence, fostering genuine connection, and developing a version of strength rooted in understanding, not avoidance.
Transcribe →The rise of masculinity influencers
Mar 1600:20:08Tap to summarizeIn this bonus episode of Men We Are, we explore the rapid rise of online masculinity influencers and the powerful role they play in shaping modern male identity. Figures like Jordan Peterson and Andrew Tate have attracted millions of followers, sparking intense debate about whether their messages are helpful guidance for young men or harmful distortions of masculinity.In this episode of The Men We Are, we explore the rapid rise of online masculinity influencers and why millions of young men are turning to figures like Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson for answers about identity, purpose, and what it means to be a man today. We examine the powerful appeal of clear messages around responsibility, hierarchy, wealth, and dominance, and why that clarity resonates with young men navigating uncertainty. We also explore the social and psychological gaps that may be driving this movement, from changing gender dynamics to the search for meaning and structure. Along the way, we unpack the influence of social media algorithms, the risks of hyper-dominant masculinity, and the potential benefits of messages about responsibility and purpose. Ultimately, we explore what healthy modern masculinity could look like, and why defining it matters.
Transcribe →Is being the provider helpful?
Mar 1200:18:18Tap to summarizeIn this bonus episode of Men We Are, we explore the evolving meaning of the provider role and what it means for modern masculinity. For generations, a man’s identity was closely tied to his ability to provide financially, protect his family, and produce results. But in today’s world where dual-income households are the norm and women often out-earn men, the traditional definition of being the “provider” is changing.We dive into the psychology behind male identity, purpose, and self-esteem, examining why employment and income can feel so closely linked to how men see themselves. Drawing on research from psychology and sociology, we explore how shifting economic realities can create confusion, insecurity, or even identity crisis for men who grew up with traditional expectations.More importantly, we ask a deeper question: is the provider role really about money, or is it about contribution, responsibility, and purpose?This episode unpacks the tension between traditional masculine roles and modern relationships, offering a thoughtful perspective on redefining provision in a healthier way, through stability, emotional reliability, leadership, and presence, rather than simply income.
Transcribe →Porn: helpful release or relationship ruiner?
Mar 900:24:59Tap to summarizeIn this bonus episode of The Men We Are podcast, we explore pornography, OnlyFans, and male sexual psychology, and how digital sexuality is reshaping modern masculinity. We take an honest, balanced look at how porn consumption affects men’s mental health, motivation, intimacy, relationships, and expectations around sex.We unpack the neuroscience of dopamine and libido, discuss “super stimuli” and parasocial relationships, and examine how platforms like OnlyFans monetize digital intimacy. We also explore the psychology of shame, loneliness, performance pressure, and emotional avoidance, asking not “Is porn evil?” but “What kind of man are we becoming through our habits?”From relationship satisfaction to discipline, confidence, and connection, we consider how private behaviors shape public lives. This episode is not about moral panic, but awareness, moderation, and responsibility.
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