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The Mindset Mentor is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the Name your price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try it@progressive.com, progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law not available in all states. Brought to you by the Capital One Savor card with Saver, you can earn unlimited 3% cash back on dining, entertainment and and at grocery stores. That's unlimited cash back on ordering takeout from home or unlimited cash back on tickets to concerts and games. So grab a bite, grab a seat and earn unlimited 3% cash back with the Savor Card. Capital One what's in your wallet? Terms apply. See capital1.com for details. When you own a small business, the workday doesn't end at 5. Your business is always on your brain, even on the days off. So when it's time to hire, you want someone who puts in the same hustle. And that hiring partner is LinkedIn jobs. When you clock out, LinkedIn clocks in. They make it easy to post your job for free. Share it with your network, and get qualified candidates that you can manage all in one place. And LinkedIn's new feature can help you write job descriptions and then quickly get your job in front of the right people with deep candidate insights. At the end of the day, the most important thing to your small business is the quality of candidates. And with LinkedIn, you can feel confident that you're getting the best. Find out why more than 2.5 million small businesses use LinkedIn for hiring today. Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com dial that's LinkedIn.com dial to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another episode. And if you're out there and you want to learn about yourself, I created an identity quiz to figure out who you are. If you want to go and take it for free, it's absolutely free. Go to identity unlockquiz.com once again. Identity unlock quiz. Com today we're going to be talking about the hidden addiction that controls your life, and today's episode might just rock the foundation of how you see yourself in the world around you. We're going to dive into something that I'm sure many people listening have never thought about before, and that's what I want to do. I want to challenge your thinking. I want you to think outside the box. I want to help you think and see the world differently so that you can see yourself differently, so that you can see the world differently, so that you can act differently, so that you're not stuck in these same patterns day in, day out. And I promise it will shift your clarity, your power, your purpose, and your peace when you start to realize these unconscious things. You bring them to the surface and you start to work through them. And so what we're going to talk about today is what you worship. And I don't mean religion or anything like that. I mean what you actually put in the center of your life, whether you realize it or not. Like, you could say, oh, yeah, my children in the center of my life. Cool, maybe. But there's also something that's probably unconsciously behind that as well. And so usually we have something or a couple things that we put into the center of our lives. And consciously or not, and we. We kind of worship these things. And everyone worships something. Most people just don't know it. And so most people hear the word worship and you start to think of going to church or Bibles or temples or gods or goddesses or. Or something of that sort. That's not what I'm talking about. Whatever might pop up when you hear that word is not what I'm talking about. That's only like one tiny slice of the pie. The truth is that worship isn't just about religion. Sure, it can be if you want it to be. That's not what we're gonna be talking about. What I'm talking about, what you worship is what you're putting in the center of the universe. What you're putting your focus and attention on the majority of your days. Because what you focus on and what you give your attention to owns you. It creates your perception of reality. And if it creates your perception of reality, it is actually going to change what you become and what you get in your life more than anything else. Like what you become, sure, but also what you grant. The power to define your worth, I guess you could say. And so let me repeat that real quick because I kind of stumbled over my words there. Worship is what you allow to define your worth. What you allow to define your worth. There's a quote I love by David Foster Wallace. And he said, there's no such thing as not worshiping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship. And here's the thing to finally realize. You didn't choose, like you don't get to choose whether or not you're going to worship something. You only get to choose what you're going to worship. And so you don't consciously choose most cases until hopefully after this podcast episode, you're going to shift and you're going to consciously choose. Because if you didn't consciously choose what matters to you and what you decide to worship, guess what? The world will choose it for you. And that's already happened to 99% of people listening to this. When I'm talking about the things that we worship, I'm going to tell you, I fit in almost every single one of them in my past in some sort of way. So what does the world want you to worship? Go through a few of them real quick. Money. Things. You know, you'll never feel like you have enough if you worship money. If you're constantly focused on getting money or that's your end goal, that hunger that you have for it, it won't go away. It's only going to get louder. And when you make money, guess what? You're going to need more of money. So that's one thing that people worship. Another thing that people worship, their body and looks. And the mirror will become your judge, your jury, your executioner. If that's the case, you need to look better. You'll constantly judge yourself. So that's another thing that people worship. Another thing that I found, intellect, your knowledge. You will always feel like a fraud or like you're not smart enough and you need to learn more and become more worthy and because you'll never get to the end of learning because it just goes on forever. Other things that people worship, Power. You know, if you worship power, then you'll feel weak at certain moments, you'll feel afraid, unsafe. You need to control everything in your life or other people to soothe your fear. You'll always feel like you need more power in some sort of way. And so these things are these, these soul sucking worship habits. They don't like devour you all at once, they just kind of slowly eat away at you quietly. So I want to dive deeper into these and give you some examples of, of what I see that people tend to worship in their lives, especially unconsciously. And let's see if maybe from this you can start to go, oh, I'm noticing myself here. So the first one, I said it a minute ago, but money, why? Because money feels like safety. And for a lot of people who didn't have a safe childhood, they want to create safety in their adulthood. And A lot of people equate money with safety. Like, when I'm speaking this, I'm speaking from 100% experience from me growing up as a child to me being an adult until I finally woke up to this, you know, because money feels like safety, it feels like freedom, it feels like power all rolled into one. So if you worship safety, if you worship freedom, if you worship power, any of those, it's a good chance you might have money at the center of your universe, whether you think you do or not. You might unconsciously have it there. You also might consciously have it there as well. Many people do. So we think, you know, like, and I. I see this all the time with people that we think, like, once I have enough money, I'll finally relax. Doesn't work that way. But you know, what's enough, for instance, because the bar always moves. And you have to understand this. You don't worship the money like the actual physical paper that's in front of you. You worship what you think it will solve in your life. And if you worship it for too long, you won't really understand how to get out of the pattern of the worship. I was reading a Reddit post a couple weeks ago, and it was in the subreddit Rich, where people who are quote, unquote, rich go in and they talk about different things. What they like, what they don't like, what they struggle with, all of this. And there's this one person I was reading, and you're gonna be like, oh, my God, boo. Who for this guy. But I'm just gonna tell you what it's. What he said. He was. He said some of the lawns, if you like, he was worth $55 million, and he was worried about retiring, and he couldn't figure out how to turn it off because he was. What happened was his greatest strength became his greatest weakness. So he made a whole bunch of money. That was the strength of his. But it's also his weakness. He doesn't know how to turn it off. And so people think that they'll stop when they hit a number. This guy had $55 million in net worth and couldn't figure out how to stop because his worry drove him to be a certain way. So, yeah, maybe money's the thing that you are. So maybe worrying is the thing that you worship. If you go to money. Like, one of my favorite quotes around money is Bob Marley. And he says, money is just numbers, and numbers never end. If it takes money to be happy, your search will happy, for happiness will Never end. So you will never really get there if that's the thing that you want. So maybe you should start figuring out something else that you want to worship outside of that. So that's one thing that I see that's very, very common, especially in our western world. And so is this next one, number two, which is achievement and success. Once again, I've been in this bucket. Why? Because we're taught that from, from very early age that gold stars and stickers create your worthiness. You know, it's ingrained into us in school. Get a gold star turns into get good grades. Get good grades turns into make sure you graduate with good grades. Graduate turns into make sure you make six figures. Make six figures turns into buy a nice car turns into buy a nice house turns into get more likes on social media, whatever it is. And so you might develop this inward hustle like your life depends on it. I've done that before when I was in my early 20s, working 110 hours a week for three years straight at my first business. You might hustle like your life depends on it because part of your identity actually does depend on it. And part of your self worth comes from your achievement and success. And maybe that came from childhood or maybe it came from the fact that you felt like you're only. Your only time you ever got love from your father was when you achieved something in sports or in school or whatever it might be and it's ingrained into you. That's not what you want to worship because you'll never be happy, you'll never get to the end of achievement, you never get to the end of success. The same way you'll never get to end of money. Because money's never, never end. Money never ends. Right? So that's another thing that I see. Another thing that's very common is body, your self image. The way that you look, the way that your body looks, the way that your face looks, the way that you dress, which you present yourself to other people. Why? Because being attractive in our culture but also in your own mind might mean validation for yourself. So you don't feel necessarily worthy. So when you get validation for other people, it makes you feel more worthy. And sure, some people are working out for health, but most people are not. Working out for health might be a piece of it, but the majority of that is approval. So some sort of approval that they want from it or some sort of attention that they want from it, or control or to feel like you're worthy because you feel like you're Unworthy. And so, you know, I used to work out when I was younger just because I hated the way that I looked and I was real skinny and linking. I wanted to get bigger. So it's like I kind of worship that for a little while. And when your reflection in the mirror doesn't match your ideal, it'll wreck your day. And so that's a form of worshiping in some sort of way. So you go to the gym more or you diet again, or you put on more makeup and you say, oh, but I like putting on makeup. There's nothing wrong with putting on makeup. I don't want you to think that. But you might be putting on makeup because there's a deep seated unworthiness the way that you look without makeup. Think about that for a second. So, because maybe what you look like defines your own self worth and the world. It's really cruel because everybody ages and that beauty will eventually turn into wrinkles. And if you worship the way that you look in the mirror, you're gonna have a really tough time as you start to get older. And then you want to fix and you want to cut and go under the knife and get surgery and get stuff pulled back or stuff removed. I don't know what people do nowadays, stuff shot into your face and so all to show that you can't worship something like that. So the, the universe has created this, this moment where it's like your beauty that you worship will eventually disappear to show you that there's something else that you should worship. And we will be right back. This is an advertisement from BetterHelp. If you listen to this podcast, you know that I think your mental health is the most important thing that we should all be focusing on. Mental health awareness is growing, but there's still progress to be made. And many people avoid seeking mental health support due to fear of judgment or stigma. When people hesitate to get help, it doesn't just affect them, it impacts their families, workplaces and entire communities. Let's encourage everyone to take care of their well being and break the stigma. The world is a better place when we are healthy and happy. Better help has over 10 years of experience matching people with the right therapists from the diverse network of credentialed therapists with a wide range of specialties. BetterHelp is fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient. Serving over 5 million people worldwide. Each easily switch therapists at any time, no extra cost. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise we're all better with. 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Another thing that people worship is intellect. Being smart or being right. I don't know about you guys, but I'm starting to be like, oh my God, I can see so many of these buckets that I fit into in the course of my life. Why? Because knowledge gives this false sense of control. It feels like safety. It feels like it makes you smarter than somebody else. It gives you some sort of power maybe. And so maybe you obsess over knowing more or Being known as the expert or winning every single argument. You might be worshiping your intellect in some sort of way, but if you do, it might come with this constant imposter syndrome and this fear of being exposed and not being smart enough. Why? Because you'll never know everything. There's always going to be someone else that's smarter than you. There will. And just as money never ends, knowledge never ends as well. And so you got to start to look at yourself and be like, is that something that I worship? You do, maybe don't. Another thing that people worship as well is romantic love and relationships and what somebody else will give me by being in a relationship with them. Why? Because love promises, like love promises to fill that empty space inside. If you notice a lot of these things I'm talking about, worshiping comes back to your own self worth. And oh yeah, if I make money, it'll fix my self worth. If I look better, it'll fix my self worth. If I get into a relationship and somebody find me, loves me and I find my other half and it'll fix my lack of self worth. So you might find a partner or cling to a partner or crush or even an idea of finding the one. Like your soul depends on it. Like you're lost without this person. So you've made them your source. You've made not even necessarily the person a lot of times, but just the idea of having that person that loves you. You've made them a source of your happiness. You've made them your, your savior, your God in some sort of way. That's way too big of a responsibility for another fallible person to try to live up to. And so maybe that's a part of it where it's like, oh yeah, I'm not good enough or I'm not, I won't finally be there until I get into the relationship. And then, you know, people get into a relationship and they get married and like that's still, I still haven't found the end of it. So like, maybe I need kids to fill this self worth hole that I have. So that's another thing that people really go after. Another thing that people really go after in worship validation. This is the reason why social media attention is so insane right now and why people really are just like addicted to it. Why? Because dopamine hits from getting likes on social media or seeing other people's stuff. It's easier than working on your self worth. So you worship the likes and you worship the followers and the algorithm gods that are out There, you check your phone, you know, you post something, and then you check to see how many likes you got two minutes later. It's sneaky and it feels like really harmless, but your worth and your peace are tied to that screen. That's dangerous. That's not what you want to be worshiping. Maybe another thing that you worship is control or certainty. Do I? Because, you know, life feels really chaotic. And it is chaotic. It's just the universe is chaotic. Things are made and stars are made by things slamming into each other and exploding, right? Everything is chaotic. That is one of the biggest truths and it always will be chaotic in the entire universe. And so when you want to control things, it feels like you're protecting in some sort of way. So you might micromanage your schedule, or you might micromanage every person that you work with or the employees that you have, or you need everyone to behave your way in the house. So you've made order your religion in some sort of way. But it'll never be that way. Real life is messy. And you know, if uncertainty comes, it'll wreck you, that's for sure. And so maybe you've also made. Another thing that I see with a lot of people is busyness or productivity. I've definitely fit into this one before. Is something that you worship. Why? Because being busy means you're important, right? You're doing something important so you can't sit still. You fill your calendar, you feel guilty for resting. I've done all of this. I'm definitely in this category as well. I've removed myself from it and been working at it for years, which is what's great. But it's not about time management. It's about worth management. And so you're. You're always checking on the clock and trying to do more, and you're busy, busy, busy, busy, busy. Got to be productive, right? Because it's like, oh, that shows that I'm important. Shows some form of self worth. Another thing and last thing I'll cover before I keep going deeper into. I just want to try to hopefully give you ideas is your victim story or your past pain story. You know why? Because it's familiar. And your identity loves familiar familiarity. But you attach this and it gives you some sort of, you know, oh, you replay the trauma, the betrayal, the thing that they did to you because it makes you feel like, oh, they did it to me. You know, this story makes me feel important. It gives you some sort of meaning. So you worship the wound because you haven't learned how to live without it. Yet there's a million different things that we worship. All of the stuff I covered. Fame, hustle, culture, perfection, status, your children, your trauma, celebrity figures, political ideologies. Oh, my God, that's a big one. Political. Oh, I'm this group, or I'm that group, your career, science, whatever it might be. So going through all of this, you start to think to yourself, all right, well, that makes sense, but what should I worship? Well, this is for you to figure out. Let's be real. This isn't me saying, like, hey, you need to go find God or you need. You need to find a religion. It's me saying, if you don't pick something that is life giving to you to anchor yourself, your soul to what you're trying to create in, in the world, the world is going to hand you a bunch of options that slowly eat you alive. You need to figure out what it is that you want to worship. Because if you're. You've gone, you know, like, I went for, for productivity and for. For safety and for money and all those things because I thought what it was going to give me, it didn't. And, you know, what you want to find is something that actually nourishes you versus depletes you. It could be, yeah, maybe for some of you, a higher power or spiritual practice that humbles you and connects you to something bigger might be also service to others. It could be tiny acts of love and good deeds and unseen, unsexy things that you do. It's, you know, you do things for other people just because it makes you feel good and you get to do it for other people and it makes them feel good. Maybe you decide to worship a core set of values that you create, like compassion or patience or courage or truth. Even the simple awareness that you're not the center of the universe, because everybody acts like they're center of the universe. Oh, this person's driving slow in front of me. Oh, are they in your way or are you in their way? And so this is about you figuring out what means the most to you and who you want to be. So many people don't have a North Star that guides them through their entire life. Like, if you don't have a North Star, that's like, this is who I am. This is who I want to be. These are my traits, my habits, my qualities, how I want to interact with myself, the world, all of that. If you don't have a North star of what you're trying to build, you'll never really Know where you're going. I want you to think about this, and I just want to say it is. Is real freedom in your life isn't getting everything that you want. Real freedom is self awareness, is growing yourself, is the power to pay attention to yourself, to notice when your attention is going to something that you don't want it to be. It's noticing when you get stuck in a feeling or a thought pattern and the ability to look at that and be like, well, that's not who I want to be. And I want to live intentionally. I want to get out of this pattern. I want to not be living on autopilot and to become aware of the unconscious patterns that we get stuck in. These. These things that we unconsciously worship. Like some people unconsciously worship, you know, going and climbing the corporate ladder. So they're stuck in the rat race. And then they realize at some point in time, hopefully that the rat race isn't a job. It's a mindset. It's an unconscious mindset that somebody worships. That's kind of at the expense of your soul. And so what do you worship? What do you want to worship? You know, you need to ask yourself stuff like, what do I constantly think about? What do I fear I'm losing? What do I worry about? What do I chase when I feel like I'm unworthy? How do I see myself spending my time most of the days? Because whatever that thing is, that's like your God, that's the thing, that's your worship, that's your altar, right? That's where your soul is bowing, whether you realize it or not. And I've been there through almost every one of the categories that I've told you that we went through earlier. For years, I unconsciously worship success or money or validation or safety or social media following. And it worked for a while until it didn't. And you know, I got to a point where I had the income, I had the freedom, I had the comfort, I had everything that I. Every single thing that I ever wanted in my life. And it still felt like something was missing. Every box was checked, still didn't fulfill me. And that's what I realized, that I had unconsciously built a throne for a false God that could never give me what I needed. So that's when I started questioning myself. And it was kind of like a dark night of a soul moment. I started shifting my focus. Hey, how can I contribute to the world? What would make me fulfilled? What would make me feel like I can? I'm doing Something good in this world. What do I want my life to be built around? Started thinking about contributing and coaching people and helping people wake up, you know, who I want to be, how I want to act, what my purpose is, deciding for myself why I'm alive and to choose that. Like, we all have the ability to choose that. And, you know, for me, it woke me up from a lot of stuff, and it changed everything. It changed the way that I see the world and everything that I do, I see from a different perspective now. And so I really want you to think about this like you're worshiping something. And maybe through this episode, you've been like, oh, my God, I noticed that I'm worshiping this, this, and this. Maybe you're listening. You're like, I'm not really sure. Okay, well, sit him around and think about it. What's the majority of your focus in your day go to? Because we'll become whatever it is that we worship. We'll become like that thing. And so the question isn't like, what do I worship? The question really should be, what is what I worship worthy of my time, attention in my soul? Because that's really what we become. And so what I want you to think about is, where does that focus? Where does that time, where does that attention go to? Is it money? Is it success? Is it worries? Is it fears that pop up in your life because those things are owning you. And so what's really best thing to do is to take a step back out of your head and to create that North Star of who you want to be, how you want to act, what your characteristics, traits, where your life is going, and have that be the thing that you start to create your life around. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram. Stories. Tag me robdial Junior R B D I A L J R. The only way this podcast grows is from you guys sharing it. So if you would share it, I would greatly, greatly appreciate it. And with that, I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission. Make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day. Did you know that parents rank financial literacy as the number one most difficult life skill to teach? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money app for families. With Greenlight, you can set up chores automate allowance and keep an eye on your kids spending. With real time notifications, kids learn to earn, save and spend wisely. And parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money with guardrails in place. Sign up for Greenlight today@Greenlight.com podcast. This season, let your shoes do the talking. Designer Shoe Warehouse is packed with fresh styles that speak to your whole vibe without saying a word. From cool sneakers that look good with everything. The easy sandals you'll want to wear on repeat. DSW has you covered. 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