B (11:07)

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A (12:06)

Dial and now back to the show, the reframe that you want to kind of take is, yeah, you missed a day, but just because you missed a day doesn't mean you failed. When you miss a day, you make micro adjustments. That's what you do. Missing a few days and not getting back up, that's the failure. Failure's not messing up one time. Failure is messing up and not getting back on the horse, not figuring out how to bounce back. The real flex is bouncing back when you do screw up. Success is not this perfect streak over years of your life. It's the speed that you recover after you screw something up. And so let the new rule that kind of guides you to be, hey, it's okay to mess up one day and, you know, to miss the gym one day, but never miss two days in a row for whatever it is. It's okay to not write one day, but I'm never going to miss two days in a row. So you can at least make sure you're batting above.500 more than 50% of the time you're showing up. What's another thing that holds you back with this trying to be consistent? Emotional avoidance. Most people think that they have a consistency problem, but in reality, what they really have is a feelings problem, you know, so they avoid consistency because it triggers emotions that they haven't learned to sit with. Like what I've been saying. The fear of success. What if I become successful and I can't keep it up? Or the fear of being seen. What if people actually notice me and then when they notice me, they judge me? Or the fear of failure, like, what if I try and it still doesn't work out? It's just easier not to try. If I'm not going to succeed in the first place, why would I try in the first place? Like, let me just not try because it's not going to work either way. Or the fear of not being good enough. Like, what if. What if I try and then I'm exposed as a fraud? And so, you know, like you say you want to post content every single day to grow your business, for instance, but what happens when you don't get as many likes as you want? You start questioning your worth. You don't think that you're good enough. That's the emotional risk that I'm talking about. And your brain doesn't like emotional risk. It's easier to not put yourself out there. It's easier to do nothing than to do something and then to be disappointed by it. And so that's why people Always choose the easy route. But the truth of all of this is that consistency, it's not just about the structure and the plan to execute on it, it's also about emotional regulation. Like you have to learn to feel discomfort and still keep going. Discomfort is not going to kill you. I promise you it won't. There might be little alarms going off in your brain of no, we don't want to be out of our comfort zone. We don't be out of our comfort zone. Discomfort is not going to kill you. Feeling fear and doing it anyways is not going to kill you. Consistency requires that you step out of your comfort zone. And so you just got to ask yourself, like, can I keep showing up even when it feels unsafe, even when it feels uncertain, even when I don't see the results, can I just keep showing up? That's how you'll eventually get to success. And then the last thing is you might just not trust yourself yet. That might be the other thing that's really holding you back from being consistent. Like this one hits deep for a lot of people. Like you've probably, if you're like most people, broken promises to yourself over and over and over and over again. So your nervous system, it doesn't actually believe you anymore. It's like being in a toxic relationship. But this relationship is you being in relationship with you. You say, oh yeah, I'll start Monday. But you know, deep down you know that there's a voice that says, ah, you said that last week. It's like if somebody says I'm going to take you out to a date on Friday and then they cancel and they take out, I'm going to take you out next Friday. And then they cancel, I'm going to take you out next Friday and they cancel. Aren't you going to lose trust in them? You're not going to believe them anymore. And so even if you want change, your body doesn't feel safe or doesn't believe in you. And so once again it's not you being lazy or being broken, it's self protection from the pain of disappointment. And so I want you to understand that you don't need more goals. You need to rebuild trust within yourself. And you start with micro consistency. Like you think to yourself, like, what's the smallest promise that I can keep to myself Today I'm going to meditate for 60 seconds. Cool, that's a win. I'm going to drink a glass of water first thing in the morning. Cool, that's another vote for I can trust myself. When you do it. I'm going to write one sentence for my book. Still counts. You see, as you stack these little teeny tiny wins, these little promises to yourself, and you keep your promises again and again and again, and eventually your nervous system learns, we're safe now. We're safe to grow. It's not big wins that build your life. It's these little teeny tiny wins that build the foundation of your life and your own self respect. And so when you look at consistency, I want to show you how I did some research on people that are very successful, that were extremely consistent in how it shows. Shows that it's not about the being the most talented person. It's about being the person who just never stops, right? So Stephen King has written every single day, even on Christmas, and has written over 65 novels because of it. Because he has written every single day, four to six hours a day for over 50 years. Holy shit. Right? That's a lot of writing. But it's just brutal consistency that has made him successful. When you look at Jerry Seinfeld, I would say probably the most successful, at least financially comedian ever, he has this method called Don't Break the Chain, where he puts an X on a calendar. He started this in, I think it was the early 80s, puts an X on a calendar every single time that he writes. And he started doing this in the 80s, like 1980, I think, is when I was reading it. 1978, 1980 was when he started. It is when he would. He goes, I'm going to write every single day. And when he would write, he. He would put a red X on his calendar, and he started doing red Xs and red X's and red X's, and his goal was to basically keep the chain going. And he just realized that he. After five days, ten days, and he saw the chain going, he's like, well, I don't want to break the chain. So I got to keep writing, even if it's just a little bit. Even if it's just crap. And so he has written every single day for over 40 years. And he says most of his jokes that he writes, because he writes every single day are trash. But somewhere in there, he finds some. Some gold that's hidden in there. Written every single day for over 40 years. And so I remember when I first started this podcast, I thought, okay, I just need to be brutally consistent. That's it. Like, I'm not as big as Stephen King and I'm not as big as Jerry Seinfeld, but I've Never missed an episode of this podcast since 2015 when it first came out. And so that's what I call cockroach consistency. And what do I mean by that? When I first got into business with one of my friends, one of my other friends was like, hey, why are you guys getting into business with each other? And my friend who was getting into business with me was like, I want to get into business with Rob. Because he's like a cockroach. Like, he cannot be killed if he makes his mind up on something. He is so consistent and just will not give up. That's not something that I've always been. It's something that I had to build into myself because I know I'm not the smartest person in the world. I'm not the most talented person in the world. So if I can just be the most. Like, I can't. I can't make myself the smartest person in the world. I can't make myself the most talented person in the world, but I can control being the most consistent person in the world. And so I just want you to understand that if you try to be as consistent as you possibly can, and you do it, and you show up as often as you possibly can, especially when no one's watching day in, day out, if you do that, you cannot lose. You will always win, because everybody else gives up at some point in time. What you're doing when you actually start to look at being consistent is, of course, you're building a skill of consistency, but you're not just building a skill, you're actually building an identity. You're building a story about who you are. You know, when you go to the gym, you're not just lifting, you're showing. I'm the type of person who shows up for myself. When you say I'm going to do something and you do it, I. Over and over again, you start showing yourself. I'm the type of person who follows through. When you write daily or post daily or meditate daily, you're slowly becoming the type of person who follows through. Eventually, once you do it over and over and over again for an extended period of time, that becomes your identity. That becomes part of who you are. And when it becomes an identity, it's unshakable. You don't have to push yourself anymore. It's just who you are at that point in time. It becomes something that you naturally do, right? And so let's talk about how to become more consistent. Even if you've never been consistent your entire life, the first thing you need to do is you need to lower the bar. And I mean like way, way down. Like, if you want to write every single day, instead of saying, oh my gosh, I want to write for four to six hours like Stephen King, write one sentence. Like, start with one sentence. If you want to meditate every single day, sit for 60 seconds or two minutes. The goal is not to be like to hit a home run. The goal is to become someone who does the thing, not somebody who crushes the thing. You know, if you become the type of person who does it, then you can always build upon the habit after it's created. So that's the first thing. The second thing is to anchor it to something that's real. This is called habit stacking. You want to tie your habit, your new action, to something that you're already doing in your routine. So like after I brush my teeth, I do a hundred pushups. That's how you get a hundred push ups into your day. After I have my coffee, I sit down and, you know, write two sentences for my book. And so once again, this is called habit stacking. It creates something called a neurological cue loop. And your brain loves that. And so try to anchor to something that already exists in your life. The third thing is to track it visually. Like, you can use Seinfeld's Don't Break the Chain, where you put an X every day that you follow through. Or you can just put a tick mark and you just see it all the time. And what you try to do is make it visual so that you see it, so that you don't forget about it. And as you start to watch the chain grow, humans hate breaking streaks. And so you're going to use this visual cue to keep you on track. The next thing you want to do is focus on the reps, not the results. Forget how good it is, forget how good it looks. Forget writing the perfect paragraph. Just do the thing, do the rep. You don't need to be perfect, you just need to finish. So take messy action if you have to. And then the last thing, the fifth thing is forgive yourself fast. You will 100% mess up at some point in time. If you're like most people, maybe you're like Seinfeld and you go for 40 years, or maybe you're like, you know, Stephen King and you go for 50 years. But if you're like an average person, you're going to screw this up at some point in time. So if you miss a day, cool, no big deal. Use it as a chance to recalibrate, not beat the crap out of yourself. You ask yourself, did I mess this up? I did. Okay. How did I mess this up? And you figure out what you did that made you mess up. And then you ask yourself, how can I make sure to not mess up again? It's not a moment to beat yourself up. It's just a moment to recalibrate. And so the goal is to never not miss. Like, to not miss. That's not what I'm trying to do. The goal is to never miss twice, to be as consistent as I possibly can be. And so you don't need to be the best, you don't need to be smartest. You just need to be the most consistent. Talent fades. Motivation fades. Perfection doesn't exist. But consistency, Consistency is what builds empires. And so what I want you to do is I want you to pick your challenge for this week. Pick one thing that's so small it's laughable, and do it every single day for the next week. Do it every single day for the next 30 days. Go for one walk, read one page, write one post, do one rep, start so small that it becomes easier to show up. And what you're trying to do is you're trying to build yourself into the type of person who does what they say, who follows through, who does this thing. Because consistency isn't just about what you do. It's about who you become. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram. Stories. Tag me in it. Robdial Jr R O B D I A L J R if you want to learn more about coaching with me outside of this podcast to make your life better and to become a high performer, go to coachwithrob.com once again, coachwithrob.com and with that, I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.

B (24:36)

All right.

A (24:41)

Foreign.

C (24:48)

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D (25:17)

My H Vac guy I found on angie.com to change my grandpa's trachea tube? Because I was so amazed by how quickly he replaced our air ducts, I knew I could trust him to change Pop Pop's tube while I was on vacation.

C (25:28)

Make it quick, young man.

A (25:31)

Aw. See?

D (25:33)

Pop up trusts you.

A (25:35)

I think we should call a doctor. Connecting homeowners with skilled pros for over 30 years. Angie. The one you trust. Define the ones you trust. Find pros for all your home projects@angie.com.

E (25:46)

There'S a fire inside you you can't ignore. Stand still. Not a chance. You're a lifelong learner who's come this far. Now we're here to help you keep going.

A (25:56)

Further.

E (25:56)

Capella University. What can't you do? Visit capella.edu to learn more.