Bernie Somers: Women and Children - The Moth

Summary of "Bernie Somers: Women and Children" – The Moth, June 29, 2009

Host: Dan Kennedy
Storyteller: Bernie Summers
Recorded At: Moth Story Slam Competition
Theme of the Night: Songs

Introduction to the Story

In his engaging and heartfelt story, Bernie Summers takes the audience on a journey exploring the intertwining of creativity, relationships, and personal growth. His narrative begins with a humorous take on the Broadway musical adaptation of the Titanic disaster, setting the stage for deeper reflections on love and self-expression.

Creating the Titanic Song

Bernie opens by recounting his reaction to a Broadway musical about the Titanic, finding it peculiar to perform extravagant show tunes about a tragic event. This led him to craft his own version of a song for the musical.

"Imagine the deck of the Titanic and people are running back and forth in a frenzy because they're all gonna die and they're all singing this song." [(02:15)]

He humorously presents his self-written song, acknowledging his lack of professional singing abilities but emphasizing that the story is the focus, not his vocal performance.

The Song Lyrics and Initial Reception

Bernie's song features the repetitive chorus, "Women and children first," reflecting the historical protocol during the Titanic's sinking. He shares the lyrics to illustrate the frantic atmosphere he envisioned.

"Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first." [(02:45)]

He explains how he shared this song with his then-girlfriend, Wendy, who appreciated its creativity and encouraged him to pursue songwriting.

"She said, you know, you should be a songwriter." [(03:10)]

The Party Incident and Conflict

At a party, Wendy passionately promotes Bernie's song, urging him to perform it for the attendees. Despite his reluctance and dismissive attitude toward his creation, Wendy persists.

"She starts singing my song, but she's butchering it first." [(04:00)]

Her misinterpretation of the lyrics and melody frustrates Bernie, leading him to confront her about her handling of his work. This confrontation marks the beginning of their emotional disconnect.

"How dare you? I wrote that song. I had to come up with words. I had to put them together." [(06:10)]

Breaking Up Over the Song

Bernie's insistence on preserving his artistic integrity culminates in a breakup with Wendy. He reflects on the irrationality of ending the relationship over a song, highlighting how trivial disputes can have significant emotional impacts.

"I can't be with anyone who doesn't get my music, man." [(07:20)]

Self-Reflection and Realization

After the breakup, Bernie discusses the conversation with his friend Joey, who points out the irony in Bernie condemning Wendy for the song when Bernie himself had dismissed it as "a stupid little song."

"You yourself said it was a stupid little song. Remember, you said when you wrote it, you weren't serious." [(08:05)]

This moment of clarity helps Bernie understand that his feelings for the song mirrored his feelings for Wendy—what began casually had evolved into something meaningful.

Lessons Learned

Bernie extracts two key lessons from this experience:

Evolving Feelings: Initial casual and carefree emotions, whether in creativity or relationships, can deepen unexpectedly.

"Sometimes when you start something was like casual, carefree feelings... sometimes those feelings can turn serious." [(08:45)]
Creative Expression: Personal turmoil can inspire new creative endeavors, as evidenced by Bernie writing a second song inspired by his melancholy.

"My melancholy mood over losing Wendy inspired me to write another song." [(09:10)]

The Second Song: A Reflection on Loss

In an emotional continuation, Bernie shares his second song for the Titanic musical, this time infused with sadness and regret. The narrative centers on a man disguised as a woman to board a lifeboat, only to regret the deceitful act.

"I'm sorry I did not want to drown. That's why I dare don this gown." [(09:55)]

This poignant song underscores the themes of sacrifice and the complexities of human emotions, illustrating Bernie's growth from humor to heartfelt introspection.

Conclusion

Bernie Summers' story encapsulates the delicate balance between artistic expression and personal relationships. Through humor, conflict, and self-discovery, he conveys the profound ways in which our creations and connections shape our lives.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

Song Creation: "Imagine the deck of the Titanic and people are running back and forth in a frenzy because they're all gonna die and they're all singing this song." [(02:15)]
Encouragement to Songwriting: "She said, you know, you should be a songwriter." [(03:10)]
Conflict Over the Song: "How dare you? I wrote that song. I had to come up with words. I had to put them together." [(06:10)]
Friend's Realization: "You yourself said it was a stupid little song. Remember, you said when you wrote it, you weren't serious." [(08:05)]
Lessons Learned: "Sometimes when you start something was like casual, carefree feelings... sometimes those feelings can turn serious." [(08:45)]
Reflection through Music: "My melancholy mood over losing Wendy inspired me to write another song." [(09:10)]

Final Thoughts

Bernie's narrative is a testament to the unexpected emotions that arise from creative pursuits and romantic relationships. His ability to weave humor with sincerity provides a relatable and moving story for listeners, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and emotional honesty.

For more stories and live events, visit themoth.org.

Transcript

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Dan Kennedy (1:22)

Welcome to the Moth Podcast. I'm Dan Kennedy. The Moth features true stories told live without notes. All stories on the podcast are taken from our ongoing storytelling series in New York and Los Angeles and from our tour shows across the country. Visit themoth.org the story you're about to hear by Bernie Summers was recorded live at a Moth Story Slam competition earlier this year. The theme of the night was songs.

Bernie Summers (1:52)

So a while back, I think even before the movie came out, there was a Broadway musical called Titanic. And it was a musical based on the sinking of the Titanic. And I remember thinking, this is odd. I mean, like, what possible razzle dazzle show tunes are performed for one of the great disasters of our time? And as a joke, I wrote my own song for my own version of the Broadway musical Titanic. And I'm gonna sing it for you right now. Please know I am not a professional singer, so judge the story, not the voice. So imagine the deck of the Titanic and people are running back and forth in a frenzy because they're all gonna die and they're all singing this song. Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first. I'm on the Titanic. Everything's a panic. I think we're sinking. What was I thinking when they asked me to go? I should have said no. Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first. Women and children first. I wish I was on dry Land I wish I took sweet swimming lessons Women and children first Women and children first Women and children Women and children Women and children first so I'm dating this girl, Wendy, and I didn't see myself falling in love with her or anything. You know, it was nothing serious. I was just having fun. And I sang to her my Titanic song. And she. She loved it. She thought it was cute and clever. She said, you know, you should be a songwriter. I said, no, no. It's just a stupid little song. So we're at this party, and Wendy's telling all these people about my song, and she wants me to sing it for them. I was like, no, no, no. It's just a stupid little song. And Wendy's like, no, come on, come on, sing it. Sing it. I said, no, no, no. I wasn't serious when I wrote it. I was just having fun. It's just a stupid little song. Song. When he says, okay, then I'll sing it. And she starts singing my song, but she's butchering it first. She's singing, Women, Children First, Women, Children First. Is that Women, Children First, Women, Children First. It's women and children first, Women and children first. And then she sings I'm on the Titanic. Everything's frantic. It doesn't go like that. It's, I'm on the Titanic. Everything's a panic. So after the party, Wendy and I are in a cab, we're heading back home. I say, you know, Wendy, in the future, when you feel like singing a song, do me a favor. Don't sing my songs. You want to sing a song, sing a Beatles song. Sing your own song. Sing a Hanukkah song, but don't sing my songs. And when he's like, what's the matter with you? What's the matter with me? What's the matter with you? You're singing my song all wrong. You get the words wrong, the melody wrong. And when he said, well, it's just a stupid little song. I said, how dare you? I wrote that song. I had to come up with words. I had to put them together. They had to rhyme. I had to come up with a catchy melody. That's my song. My song. And look what you've done to my song. So I broke up with her. Cause you know, I can't be with anyone who doesn't get my music, man. So a couple weeks later, I'm talking to my friend Joey and telling him about the whole Wendy thing. And he knew about my song. I sang it for him, and Joey said, bernie, Let me get this straight. You broke up with a girl because she didn't like your song? I said, that's right. She said it was a stupid little song. And Joy reminded me and said, bernie, you yourself said it was a stupid little song. Remember, you said when you wrote it, you weren't serious. You were just having fun. And I realized he was right. Because when I did set out to write the song, I wasn't serious. I was just having fun. But a funny thing happened. Once the song was written and once I sang it a few times, I found myself kind of caring about it. And I realized my feelings for the song paralleled my feelings for Wendy. Because when I started dating her, you know, it wasn't anything serious. I was just having fun. But when I broke up with her, I found myself kind of missing her and kind of caring about her, too. So I was going to call her and apologize and ask her if she wanted to go out, But I heard through the grapevine she was dating another guy, a musician. The ones that can actually sing and play guitar. Ooh. But two good things came out of this experience. Number one, I did learn a lesson. And that is sometimes when you start something was like casual, carefree feelings. Whether it's writing a song or dating someone, sometimes those feelings can turn serious. The other good thing that came from it, my melancholy mood over losing Wendy, inspired me to write another song for my version of the Broadway musical Titanic. Do you want to hear it? Good. It's a sad song. For years, there was a story going around that when the Titanic was sinking, a man dressed up as a woman in order to get into one of the lifeboats. So picture a lifeboat. And they discover the man dressed up as a woman, and they're about to throw him over, and the man says, no, wait, let me explain. And he starts singing this song. So the moon is sort of like spotlighting him, you know, he's still in the dress. He sings, I'm sorry I did not want to drown. That's why I dare don this gown. Then everyone in the lifeboat sings, he's sorry he did not want to drown. That's why he dared don this gown. I did not want to.