Episode Summary: Ernesto Quiñonez: Spanish Harlem, 7th Grade

Podcast: The Moth
Host/Author: The Moth
Episode Title: Ernesto Quiñonez: Spanish Harlem, 7th Grade
Release Date: September 27, 2011

Introduction

In this poignant installment of The Moth Podcast, Ernesto Quiñonez recounts his tumultuous experiences growing up in Spanish Harlem during his seventh-grade years. Recorded live at The Moth in Denver, Ernesto delves deep into themes of bullying, racial prejudice, and personal growth, offering listeners an intimate glimpse into the challenges he faced and the lessons he learned.

The Bullying by Mario

Ernesto begins by painting a vivid picture of his school environment in the Spanish Harlem section of New York City. He introduces Mario, a formidable ninth grader whose presence instilled fear among the younger seventh graders. Mario's intimidation tactics were both physical and verbal. Ernesto describes Mario's routine:

"Mario had this scene that he would create, and it was that he would wait till lunchtime, and then what he would do is that he would pace in between the tables where the seventh graders were having their lunch."
[02:15]

Mario would carry a carton of milk, using it as a weapon to assert his dominance. His verbal assaults were derogatory, often targeting the Latino students with slurs like “wetback,” which further fueled the tension and anxiety among the younger students.

The Initial Confrontation

The constant harassment pushed Ernesto to a breaking point. One day, while enjoying ice cream, Ernesto decided he had enough:

"I was determined to hit him. I feel Mario doing his little scene, and I feel him on my back... I was determined to hit him."
[04:50]

However, when Ernesto finally confronted Mario, the confrontation did not go as planned. Instead of standing his ground, Ernesto found himself overpowered:

"I was there. He was towering over me, and I barely reached his neck... he took my ice cream."
[06:30]

Despite his anger, Ernesto chose to back down, a decision that left him feeling both humiliated and conflicted about his approach to dealing with bullying.

Escalation and Retaliation

Frustrated by the ineffectiveness of direct confrontation, Ernesto and a friend devised a plan to retaliate against Mario in a way that would undermine his authority. They orchestrated a scheme to have Mario receive a subscription to a men’s adult magazine, intending to expose and embarrass him:

"We knew every family. Spanish Harlem. It's the mother who has the mail key... We went to school and we waited and we waited and we got terrorized."
[09:10]

The retaliation backfired when rumors spread that Mario had been beaten by his father, leading to Mario’s absence from school and a shift in his demeanor:

"The next time I saw Mario in school, when he did come, he had a cast on his face... And he wasn't the same Mario."
[11:45]

Reflection and Realization

Ernesto reflects on the repercussions of their actions, recognizing the depth of the prejudice that fueled the bullying. He acknowledges his own role in perpetuating stereotypes and the impact of societal prejudices on personal behaviors:

"What I had to realize was that Mario wasn't a bully. He was a racist. He was a racist bully... I'm guilty of that because I had subscribed to this notion, this fear of homosexuality that was rampant in El Barrio."
[12:00]

This introspection leads Ernesto to understand the broader implications of racism and prejudice, not just on others but within himself. He grapples with feelings of guilt and the realization that their actions were rooted in fear and misunderstanding.

Conclusion: A Path to Forgiveness

In the closing moments of his story, Ernesto expresses a heartfelt apology to Mario, recognizing the pain and consequences of their mutual hostility. He contemplates the possibility of seeking forgiveness and the importance of learning from past mistakes:

"Mario, I am sorry. We were just two kids stuck in a ghetto. We didn't know any better. It was me. I'm sorry. It was me."
[12:45]

This apology encapsulates Ernesto’s journey from fear and retaliation to understanding and remorse, highlighting the transformative power of reflection and empathy.

Afterword

Ernesto Quiñonez's narrative not only sheds light on the personal struggles of growing up in a prejudiced environment but also underscores the enduring impact of racism on individuals and communities. His story serves as a testament to the importance of confronting and overcoming ingrained biases to foster a more compassionate and understanding society.

Notable Achievements:
Ernesto Quiñonez's debut novel, Bodega Dreams, was recognized by The New York Times as a new immigrant classic and was selected by the New York Public Library as one of 25 Books to Remember. He currently serves as an assistant professor at Cornell University, continuing to influence and inspire through his work.

Quote Highlights:

• Ernesto Quiñonez:

  "What I had to realize was that Mario wasn't a bully. He was a racist."
  [12:00]

• Ernesto Quiñonez:

  "Mario, I am sorry. We were just two kids stuck in a ghetto. We didn't know any better. It was me. I'm sorry. It was me."
  [12:45]

This episode of The Moth stands as a powerful exploration of the complexities of adolescence, identity, and the long-lasting effects of prejudice. Through Ernesto Quiñonez's heartfelt storytelling, listeners are invited to reflect on their own experiences and the broader societal issues that shape our interactions and perceptions.