Introducing: What We Spend

Summary

The Moth Podcast Summary: "Introducing: What We Spend"

Episode Title: Introducing: What We Spend
Release Date: April 23, 2025
Host: The Moth
Episode Focus: Kelly's struggle with outstanding student loan debt

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Introduction to "What We Spend"

In this inaugural episode of "What We Spend," hosted by Courtney Harrell, The Moth delves into the often-taboo subject of personal finances. This new podcast series offers an intimate exploration of individuals' financial lives by documenting a full week of their monetary transactions, emotions, and challenges. By bringing transparency to how money influences daily decisions, "What We Spend" aims to foster open conversations about financial well-being.

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Meet Kelly: Navigating Student Loan Debt

The episode spotlights Kelly, a 32-year-old from Salt Lake City, Utah, who embodies the financial struggles faced by millions of Americans burdened with student loan debt. Kelly recently married Ben, an engineer earning approximately $78,000 annually, while she herself makes around $50,000 as the Director of Client Experience at a medical spa and an online mental wellness coach.

Notable Quote:
"I have $150,000 [student loan debt]. I remember pressing submit on the payment and just being like, holy shit." — Kelly [03:42]

Despite receiving substantial financial support from her family—her parents covered half of her debt—Kelly still grapples with the remaining $150,000, which she describes as feeling only "50% better."

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Living with Financial Constraints

Kelly and Ben's combined income places them just below the average for married couples in Salt Lake City. Their monthly expenses total approximately $4,800, not including debt repayments. These expenses include:

• Rent and Utilities: $2,800
• Gym Memberships: $108
• Car Insurance: $254
• Gas: $125
• Phone Payments: $75
• Pet Insurance: $76
• Physical Therapy: $250
• Groceries: $600
• Medications and Supplements: $650
• Streaming Services: $76
• Hair Care: $40
• Miscellaneous Subscriptions: Including Dropbox, SoundCloud, and Spotify

Notable Quote:
"It's kind of this tug of war." — Kelly [05:16]

Kelly describes her relationship with money as "all-consuming," likening the persistent stress to having "the monkey on their back." This constant mental burden affects her daily life, making financial planning both a necessity and a source of anxiety.

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The Reality of Student Loan Debt

With a total debt of $202,728, primarily from her education at Belmont University and a master's in mental health counseling, Kelly reflects on the pressures that led her to incur such debt.

Notable Quote:
"The dream or the lie that was sold to my generation was like, if you don't go to college, you're going to end up working at McDonald's." — Kelly [08:23]

Kelly acknowledges that she did not anticipate the financial strain of her education, noting, "I didn't think about how I'm going to pay this off...your prefrontal cortex is not developed when you are making those decisions." Her honest admission highlights a generational issue where the push for higher education often overlooks the long-term financial implications.

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Managing Finances: A Week in Kelly's Life

Each week on "What We Spend," participants track every dollar they spend to uncover deeper insights into their financial habits and emotions. Kelly approaches this task with a mix of nervousness and curiosity.

Notable Quote:
"I'm feeling nervous because maybe I will just realize...I'm very irresponsible and this is all my fault. But I'm feeling curious." — Kelly [10:30]

Her meticulous budgeting involves a detailed spreadsheet, where she categorizes every expense—from essential bills like rent and utilities to personal indulgences like hair care. This rigorous tracking aims to provide a clearer picture of her financial landscape and the emotional toll it takes.

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Insights and Reflections

Kelly's journey underscores the complexity of managing finances amidst significant debt. Her experience reflects broader societal expectations around education and financial responsibility, highlighting the pervasive anxiety that money can induce.

Notable Quote:
"Whatever you're buying or not buying or saving or spending at the end of the day, money is always about more than your balance." — Courtney Harrell [05:16]

Through Kelly's story, "What We Spend" emphasizes that money is not merely a numerical value but a constant presence influencing every aspect of life, from career choices to personal well-being.

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Conclusion

In this premiere episode, The Moth successfully sets the stage for "What We Spend" by presenting a raw and relatable narrative of financial struggle. Kelly's honest portrayal of her debt and her proactive steps to understand her spending habits offers listeners a profound look into the emotional and practical challenges of managing personal finances. As the series progresses, it promises to continue unveiling the intricate ways money shapes our lives, fostering a more open and informed dialogue around financial wellness.

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For more episodes and stories, follow "What We Spend" on your preferred podcast platform.

Transcript

[Podcast Host]

Hi, everyone. As a moth listener, we know you enjoy the magic that comes from first person storytelling and are deeply curious about people's lived experiences. That's why we'd like to present a new podcast we think you'll enjoy. It's called what We Spend, and it allows us a unique window into a subject matter that feels taboo to openly. Money. In each episode, host Courtney Harrell talks with one person as they document a full week of their lives and all the ways money has factored into it. People from all over the country and all walks of life share the ways they make money, the ways they spend money, and all the thoughts and emotions they have along the way. The conversations are intimate, thoughtful, often fun, sometimes emotional, but always real. In this preview, we hear from Kelly as she navigates life with the all too familiar burden of outstanding student loan debt. For the full episode, be sure to search for what we spend on your favorite podcast platform.

[Courtney Harrell]

You know how you always want to know about everyone else's money? You do, right? Like, you'll see someone buying something you want or taking some amazing vacation and you think, how can they afford that? Or you meet your friend's new girlfriend and she has some very impressive job and you think, how much money does she make? I think when it comes to money, even if you don't want to admit it, we're all a little nosy. But I don't know, I actually think that's good. I think we should be talking about money more and all the ways, big and small, that it impacts our lives. On this show, we are actually going to do that. We are going to go somewhere that we almost never get to go deep into the heart of someone else's finances. Here's how this is going to work. Each week, I'm going to introduce you to a new person from somewhere across the country, and they are going to tell us everything about their finances. How much they make, how much they want to make, what they worry about, or if they don't worry at all. And then for one week, we'll follow them through their daily routine. Every day they'll record an audio diary with all the nitty gritty details of how they're spending their money. I mean, the coffees, the groceries, the rent that's due, the car accident that suddenly upends everything. And after that, we'll talk about what the week brought up for them, what it's made them feel. Because whatever you're buying or not buying or saving or spending at the end of the day, money is always about More than your balance. I'm Courtney Harrell, and this is what we spend. How much school debt do you have?

[Kelly]

I have 150,000. I had more. I had 300,000 after my master's. I had a great uncle pass away who was an artist. And my parents chose with their share of that that they would help pay off all my private loans. And so that was a crazy night. We, like, I remember pressing submit on $150,000 payment and just being like, holy shit. And they were like, yay. Doesn't that feel so much better? And I was kind of like, it feels like 50% better. And it still feels like I have still $150,000 of debt.

[Courtney Harrell]

This is Kelly.

[Kelly]

I turn 32 in one week, and I live in Salt Lake City.

[Courtney Harrell]

Kelly is One of the 42.8 million Americans who has student loan debt. And also, like a lot of her generation, she wants to buy a home and have a baby, and she's trying to figure out if it's possible to make all that work. Kelly married her husband about a year ago, and eight months ago, the two of them moved from Tennessee to Salt Lake City, Utah. Ben is an engineer for a software company. Kelly's a director of client experience at a medical spa, and she's also an online mental wellness coach.

[Kelly]

I used to be a therapist, and for lots of reasons, I'm not right now, but I will always have therapy or coaching in my life, and I will probably go back to that full time at some point.

[Courtney Harrell]

Kelly is paid hourly, but she makes about 50k a year, and Ben makes about 78k. That's before taxes and health insurance together. That puts them just under the average income for married couple families in Salt Lake City. How would you describe your relationship with money consuming?

[Kelly]

Oh, I would describe it as all consuming. Yeah. The thing that keeps, like, coming to mind is, you know when someone has, like, an addiction or a struggle and they call it like, the monkey on their back. Yeah, because you just can't get away from it. It's just clinging and it's present with you all the time. It feels like that. And I try really hard to, like, be in control, like, maintain my control.

[Courtney Harrell]

Yeah.

[Kelly]

But it's kind of this tug of war.

[Courtney Harrell]

What do you do on a weekly basis to manage your expenses?

[Kelly]

On a Sunday, I will sit down and look at the budget. And I made a spreadsheet.

[Courtney Harrell]

Okay. Yeah. So walk me through your spreadsheet. So I would love to hear what all of your regular expenses are and, like, what you kind of Typically pay in each category.

[Kelly]

So rent and utilities. 2,800. That's pretty expensive for rent. Anytime I tell someone that, they're like, that's more than my mortgage. I'm like, yeah, I. I know. Please don't tell me what your mortgage is. I don't want to know.

[Courtney Harrell]

Two gym memberships. 108. Car insurance, 254.

[Kelly]

Gas, 125.

[Courtney Harrell]

Do you have a car payment?

[Kelly]

No, we just buy used cars.

[Courtney Harrell]

Nice.

[Kelly]

Ben's car. Basically, the roof flies off, but, you know, just don't take it on the highway, you know, we don't have a car payment.

[Courtney Harrell]

Who needs a roof?

[Kelly]

Yeah, who needs that? It's a convertible.

[Courtney Harrell]

Phone payments, 75. Pet insurance, 76. And physical therapy for 250. It helps with Kelly's chronic back pain and osteoarthritis.

[Kelly]

And then groceries. This one sucks the most right now, and I really feel like everyone will understand. I put 600amonth for our groceries. And I mean, that includes like toiletries and stuff too.

[Courtney Harrell]

They have a Costco membership, but they pay that yearly fee with the cash back they get from their credit card.

[Kelly]

Medications and supplements. Like, Ben works out, so he has like this huge bag of protein powder that he gets from Costco. So Ben's is mostly workout supplements and just one medication. And mine is, I think, like four medications and like a probiotic and some multivitamins. Total for that is 650 streaming platforms. No, we mooch off of our families.

[Courtney Harrell]

Some of the subscriptions are on them, though. Dropbox for 12. Soundcloud for 6. Spotify for 10.

[Kelly]

Hair. My hair. I put $40 next to my hair, and that's so I can spend that $40 and get my hair washed by somebody else one time every month. And it is like the gift to me to have somebody else wash my hair every once in a while. And isn't that shitty that like, even now, just reading my own budget, that it really is just my business? I still feel the need to justify, like I just need to treat myself sometimes and have my hair washed.

[Courtney Harrell]

What does that make your expenses altogether, your regular expenses?

[Kelly]

Around 4,800amonth. But then you get to debt.

[Courtney Harrell]

How much debt do you have?

[Kelly]

A lot. If you are including my student loans, we have $202,728 in debt.

[Courtney Harrell]

Where did you go to school?

[Kelly]

I went to Belmont University in Nashville, Tennessee.

[Courtney Harrell]

Why did you go to school?

[Kelly]

I thought I was supposed to because I was told that, you know, this is. This is the next Step. And I think this is part of, like, the. The dream or the lie that was sold to my generation was like, if you don't go to college, you're going to end up working at McDonald's, you know, and, like, you're going to be a deadbeat and you're going to have to live with your parents and you're probably going to use marijuana even, and, like, you're going to be a bad person essentially, if you don't go to college.

[Courtney Harrell]

Kelly's degree cost about 40 grand a year. And after undergrad, Kelly went on to grad school at the same university. She has a master's in mental health counseling. But as Kelly sees it now, the math doesn't make much sense. I want to ask you something about that, and I mean, no judgment with this. How did you think you were going to pay off that amount of tuition? Or were you at the time? Like, I know I can't pay this off. Like, how did you think about it then?

[Kelly]

Oh, no, it's a good question. I didn't. I did not think about it. I had no clue what I was doing. It wasn't like, I wonder how I'm going to pay this off when the, you know, average annual salary for a therapist is 40 to 60 thousand dollars a year. I was not thinking about that. I had no idea what I was doing, and I didn't really have anyone around me who was explaining what I was doing. Like, your prefrontal cortex is not developed when you are making those decisions.

[Courtney Harrell]

Yeah.

[Kelly]

Ultimately, I don't regret anything because I am who I am and I'm happy, but I'm financially trapped.

[Courtney Harrell]

So that's Kelly. And this week, instead of just tracking it in her spreadsheet, she's going to tell us about every dollar she spends and every feeling that comes with it. How are you feeling about tracking your finances for a week?

[Kelly]

I'm feeling nervous because maybe I will just realize through tracking every expense that I'm actually just a dum dum and I'm very irresponsible and this is all my fault. But I'm feeling curious. I'm just curious to see what comes of it.

[Courtney Harrell]

Yeah, me too. I will check in with you on the other side of your week. Okay.

[Podcast Host]

To listen to more, follow what We Spend An Odyssey Original Podcast. Wherever you get your podcasts.