Podcast Summary: Jonathan Ames - From Boyhood to Fatherhood
Podcast: The Moth
Episode Title: Jonathan Ames: From Boyhood to Fatherhood
Release Date: September 29, 2008
Host: The Moth
Storyteller: Jonathan Ames
Introduction
In the episode titled "From Boyhood to Fatherhood," Jonathan Ames shares a deeply personal and transformative journey through a series of unconventional jobs that ultimately shaped his destiny and led him to fatherhood. Recorded live at The Moth mainstage, Ames's narrative intertwines humor, vulnerability, and life lessons, offering listeners an intimate glimpse into his formative years.
Early Struggles and the Pursuit of Freedom (00:01:43 - 00:03:30)
Ames begins his story during his sophomore year at Princeton in 1984, grappling with a tarnished reputation due to excessive drinking and problematic behavior. Faced with the prospect of four years of active duty and eight years of reserve duty in the Army—an obligation he undertook to finance his education—Ames seeks a year of freedom as a reprieve.
“This was my last chance at freedom was after, you know, taking this year off from school.”
(00:02:15)
He reveals a turning point: a friend's suggestion that he pursue modeling as a means to make money during his hiatus. Despite his self-deprecating view of his appearance, Ames’s vanity persuades him to give it a try.
Venturing into Modeling (00:03:30 - 00:06:00)
With limited expectations, Ames takes his friend's photographs and contacts a modeling agency from the Princeton library's Manhattan phone book. To his surprise, he receives a call the next morning inviting him to New York City for a contract signing. Ames is introduced to Bruce Weber, a renowned photographer known for his work with Abercrombie & Fitch and Vanity Fair.
“So suddenly with this small agency, which existed for about a year... I was a model and I'm going off to this Bruce Webber photo shoot.”
(00:04:45)
At the photoshoot in the Hamptons, Ames depicts a surreal scene reminiscent of Christopher Isherwood's "The Berlin Stories," surrounded by fellow blonde male models engaging in rigorous physical activities to prepare for their shots. Despite feeling embarrassed about certain aspects of the shoot, Ames navigates the experience, resulting in a photograph that would later find its way into the Whitney Biennial.
“I ended up in the Whitney Biennial. I like to say to my artist friends, I've been in the Biennial.”
(00:05:50)
Ames shares a tangible memento from this period—a photograph by Bruce Weber—which symbolizes both his foray into modeling and the unexpected paths life can take.
Romantic Entanglements and Lessons in Love (00:06:00 - 00:09:00)
During his modeling career, Ames meets a striking assistant of Bruce Weber, sparking a brief romantic encounter. However, the story takes a pivotal turn during a series of "go see" appointments—modeling auditions meant for quick meetings with potential clients.
“It was all fusing in my mind. So I call her and I get her roommate.”
(00:07:30)
Ames recounts an evening in the West Village where, after drinking two bottles of wine, he finds himself making love with his friend's roommate, an older and exotic woman. Reflecting on this experience, he shares a humorous yet poignant lesson about intimacy:
“You never ask a woman if you can have your ultimate moment. You just go ahead and have it.”
(00:08:45)
This encounter, though fleeting, becomes a foundational experience that shapes his approach to relationships and personal confidence.
Modeling Abroad and a Shift Towards Writing (00:09:00 - 00:10:30)
Encouraged by his initial success, Ames travels to Milan to further his modeling career, securing gigs with prominent photographers and appearing in various advertisements. However, his stint in Europe is abruptly halted by a severe bar fight in Paris that leaves him injured.
“I get in a terrible bar fight in Paris, France, and I get my nose broken and my lips split...”
(00:09:15)
Faced with physical scars and a deepened desire to pursue writing—a passion he feels is incompatible with modeling—Ames abandons his modeling aspirations. Instead, he becomes a male au pair in the Montparnasse neighborhood of Paris, working with young children and finding solace in the structured environment juxtaposed against his tumultuous modeling life.
Fatherhood Beckons (00:10:30 - 00:13:00)
Upon returning to the United States, Ames immerses himself in a summer job at Camp Thoreau in New Hampshire, leveraging his experience as an au pair. Despite ongoing struggles with alcohol, a chance encounter with an art counselor leads to a meaningful relationship. A whimsical incident involving a bat crossing their path becomes a serendipitous symbol of their connection, culminating in intimacy.
“It was quite lovely. But the next day it turned out I was terribly ill and I ended up having salmonella poisoning...”
(00:12:30)
Tragically, Ames falls ill, and as his camp year concludes, he reconnects with the art counselor as a father. A letter arrives revealing the birth of his son, a 15-month-old boy resembling him, marking the culmination of his transformative journey.
“So I became his dad. And I have to say it's the best job I've ever had and my son is now 17...”
(00:13:00)
Ames reflects on the intertwining paths of his various jobs, alcohol-induced misadventures, and chance encounters, all of which have uniquely positioned him for the profound responsibility and joy of fatherhood.
Conclusion
Jonathan Ames's story is a testament to the unpredictable nature of life's journey. From the halls of Princeton to the fashion runways of Milan, and from chaotic nights in Paris to the serene settings of Camp Thoreau, each experience, no matter how disparate, contributed to his personal growth and eventual embrace of fatherhood. His candid storytelling underscores themes of self-discovery, resilience, and the unforeseen ways in which our paths converge to shape our destinies.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps
-
On Seeking Freedom:
“This was my last chance at freedom was after, you know, taking this year off from school.”
(00:02:15) -
On Modeling Success:
“So suddenly with this small agency, which existed for about a year... I was a model and I'm going off to this Bruce Webber photo shoot.”
(00:04:45) -
On the Whitney Biennial:
“I ended up in the Whitney Biennial. I like to say to my artist friends, I've been in the Biennial.”
(00:05:50) -
On Learning a Lesson in Love:
“You never ask a woman if you can have your ultimate moment. You just go ahead and have it.”
(00:08:45) -
On Fatherhood:
“So I became his dad. And I have to say it's the best job I've ever had and my son is now 17...”
(00:13:00)
Final Thoughts
Jonathan Ames's engaging narrative not only entertains but also imparts meaningful life lessons. His ability to find humor in adversity and extract valuable insights from a series of unconventional jobs serves as an inspiration for listeners navigating their own unpredictable life paths. Through his story, Ames eloquently captures the essence of personal transformation and the enduring impact of the choices we make.