Summary of "To Judaism and Back" by Judy Gold

Podcast Information:

• Title: The Moth
• Host/Author: The Moth
• Episode: Judy Gold: To Judaism and Back
• Release Date: February 6, 2012

Introduction

In the episode titled "To Judaism and Back," comedian and actor Judy Gold shares her deeply personal journey navigating her Jewish heritage, familial expectations, and her own identity. Told with humor and poignant insight, Judy’s story explores the complexities of growing up in a strictly religious household, the challenges of personal rebellion, and the eventual reconciliation with her cultural roots.

Early Life and Upbringing

Judy begins by recounting her mother's unwavering commitment to Judaism. Her mother, born in 1922, was a trailblazer who attended Hebrew school alongside boys, even when it was uncommon for girls to do so. Judy reflects on her mother's dedication:

“My mother made us go to Hebrew School. And she made us, my brother and sister and I, she made us go to Hebrew High School. And I hated it so much.”
[03:45]

Growing up in a kosher home in suburban New Jersey, Judy describes the strict adherence to Jewish customs. Her mother enforced these traditions rigorously, leading to tense household dynamics whenever rules were broken, such as using the wrong utensils for meat and dairy.

Rebellion and Identity Struggle

As Judy entered adolescence, the pressure of her religious upbringing led her to rebel. She contrasts her experiences with those of her peers, highlighting her feelings of being an outsider:

“Everyone else was smoking pot and drinking, and I was eating cheeseburgers in the backyard.”
[08:15]

Judy's rebellion extended to embracing behaviors starkly different from her upbringing, seeking solace in non-traditional activities and distancing herself from the religious practices she was raised with. This period was marked by a struggle between adhering to her heritage and forging her own identity.

Turning Point: Father's Death

A pivotal moment in Judy’s life occurs with her father's heart attack and subsequent death. This tragedy acts as a catalyst for introspection and reevaluation of her relationship with Judaism. Judy narrates the experience with emotional depth:

“When we finally unplugged him, my brother, sister, mother and I were standing around his bed when he took his last breath. And we all looked at each other and recited the 23rd Psalm.”
[11:50]

The funeral and mourning process, steeped in Jewish customs, provided Judy with a renewed connection to her faith and community. Participating in traditions such as washing hands after visiting the cemetery and sitting shiva deepened her understanding of her cultural identity.

Reconnecting with Judaism

Following her father's death, Judy consciously decides to reconnect with her Jewish roots. She integrates her religious practices into her life as a stand-up comedian, finding a balance between her career and cultural obligations:

“I decided I was going to go wherever I was doing stand up, I was going to find a synagogue and go, say mourners cottage every Saturday.”
[13:20]

This commitment extends to her personal life as she begins to embrace Jewish traditions once more, despite her non-traditional lifestyle. Her efforts to maintain these practices signify a profound shift towards honoring her heritage.

Raising a Jewish Family

Judy’s journey culminates in her decision to raise her children within the Jewish faith. Opting for a Jewish sperm donor and establishing kosher practices in her home, she strives to create a Jewish environment for her sons:

“I decided to kosher my kitchen because that's how I had grown up. And I decided that I wanted my son to have Friday night dinners just like I had growing up.”
[14:45]

Despite unconventional aspects of her personal life, Judy integrates Jewish customs into her family’s daily routines, ensuring that her children are connected to their cultural roots.

Emotional Culmination and Legacy

The emotional apex of Judy’s story occurs during her son Henry’s bar mitzvah. This event symbolizes the fruition of her efforts to blend tradition with her modern life, highlighting her transformation and acceptance of her Jewish identity:

“I thought to myself, oh my God, I am the ultimate Jewish mother. I have created a Jewish man.”
[15:50]

Witnessing her son's bar mitzvah reaffirms Judy's journey back to her faith and the importance of maintaining cultural traditions amidst personal evolution.

Conclusion

Judy Gold's "To Judaism and Back" is a heartfelt narrative that delves into the intricate dance between personal identity and cultural heritage. Her story underscores the significance of family traditions, the impact of personal loss, and the enduring strength of cultural ties. Through humor and vulnerability, Judy illustrates the transformative power of embracing one's roots while navigating the complexities of modern life.

Notable Quotes:

• “I hated it so much.”
  — Judy Gold on attending Hebrew High School
  [03:45]

• “Everyone else was smoking pot and drinking, and I was eating cheeseburgers in the backyard.”
  — Judy Gold on her rebellious phase
  [08:15]

• “When we finally unplugged him... we all looked at each other and recited the 23rd Psalm.”
  — Judy Gold on her father's passing
  [11:50]

• “I decided I was going to... say mourners cottage every Saturday.”
  — Judy Gold on reconnecting with Judaism
  [13:20]

• “I am the ultimate Jewish mother. I have created a Jewish man.”
  — Judy Gold on her son's bar mitzvah
  [15:50]

About Judy Gold: Judy Gold is a renowned comedian and actor, best known for her Off Broadway one-woman shows, including "The Judy Gold Show" and "25 Questions for a Jewish Mother." Her work often explores themes of family, identity, and cultural tradition with comedic brilliance and heartfelt sincerity.

Additional Resources: For more stories like Judy Gold's, visit The Moth or explore the "Best of the Moth Volume 16 CD" available on The Moth Store and iTunes.