The Moth Radio Hour: Fathers Release Date: June 17, 2025
Host/Producer: Jay Allison, The Moth
Produced by: Atlantic Public Media, Woods Hole, Massachusetts

Introduction

The Moth Radio Hour’s episode titled "Fathers" delves into the profound and varied experiences of fatherhood, paternity, and paternal relationships. Hosted by Jay Allison, this episode features a collection of compelling true stories narrated live by individuals who share their unique journeys involving fathers, grandfathers, stepfathers, and the transformative moments of becoming a parent themselves. Through vivid storytelling, listeners are invited to explore the complexities, challenges, and deep emotional bonds that define the paternal role.

Andrew Postman: Conquering the Fainting Bug to Embrace Fatherhood

Timestamp: 02:29 – 15:15

Andrew Postman opens his narrative by recounting his lifelong struggle with fainting spells, a condition that often placed him on the edge in intense moments. Starting with his first fainting episode at his cousin's bris at 18 years old, Andrew describes how these incidents plagued him through emotional and stressful situations, including witnessing violent film scenes and medical procedures.

Notable Quote:

“I think telling myself this made me feel somehow morally pure, as if it was something that it was good that I had gone through.”
— Andrew Postman [09:45]

Despite these challenges, Andrew's story takes a pivotal turn with the birth of his first son. Determined to be present during the delivery, he prepares meticulously by watching intense film scenes to mentally steel himself. However, faced with the sudden emergency of a breech birth, Andrew experiences a life-altering moment of vulnerability. Holding his newborn son, he finally overcomes his fainting episodes, symbolizing a profound personal transformation.

Two years later, during the birth of his second son, Andrew confronts his fears once more in an amniocentesis procedure. As he nears fainting again, his wife, Alex, displays remarkable strength and quick thinking, saving both Andrew and their unborn child. This near-tragic event forces Andrew to confront his fears head-on, leading him to embrace fatherhood with renewed courage and resilience.

Key Insights:

• The journey from fear and avoidance to embracing responsibility.
• The symbolic overcoming of personal vulnerabilities through the act of fatherhood.
• The vital role of a supportive partner in navigating life’s extreme moments.

Boris Timonofsky: Honoring Ancestral Memories

Timestamp: 20:36 – 36:33

Boris Timonofsky shares a poignant story about his attempt to honor his late grandfather’s memory during a business trip to Russia. Tasked by his mother with distributing secondhand clothes and visiting his grandfather’s grave, Boris’s journey becomes an exploration of family legacy and personal connection.

Upon arriving at the cemetery, Boris struggles to locate his grandfather's grave without the provided map. He interacts with a cemetery attendant and an inquisitive young boy who assist him in searching through multiple graves bearing the same name. Despite identifying 17 possible graves, Boris is unable to discern his grandfather’s resting place solely based on the lack of portraits distinguishing each tombstone.

Notable Quote:

“And if this is really my grandfather who's laying there, then all is well and good and he got the most. But if not, then let this be a consolation to the stranger.”
— Boris Timonofsky [34:30]

In a moment of reflection, Boris decides to place an additional flower on the graves he visits, creating a gesture of both hope and consolation. The following day, upon returning home, Boris learns that his mother's second cousin saw the flowers, confirming his visit's authenticity and deepening his connection to his heritage.

Key Insights:

• The emotional complexity of reconnecting with ancestral roots.
• The struggle between fulfilling familial expectations and personal uncertainty.
• The enduring impact of family stories and memories across generations.

Anneliese Rakiz: Navigating Stepfather Relationships

Timestamp: 20:36 – 36:33

Anneliese Rakiz narrates her experiences growing up with a stepfather named Bill amidst her mother's turbulent relationship with her biological father. Her Palestinian father’s mental illness led to the family's move to live with grandparents until Bill entered their lives, bringing stability and structure.

Initially, Anneliese and Bill share a tumultuous relationship marked by frequent arguments and defiance. One significant source of conflict arises during mealtime, particularly over eating vegetables like Brussels sprouts. Anneliese’s inventive attempts to dodge vegetables lead to a memorable incident where she tries to dispose of them discreetly in the bathroom, only to be thwarted by Bill’s keen observation.

Notable Quote:

“When Bill first saw my brother and I, people were saying there was something wrong with us. But he took one look at us and he said, they're just depressed.”
— Anneliese Rakiz [31:01]

Despite the rocky start, their relationship evolves as Bill becomes more understanding and supportive, especially after Anneliese later learns of his battle with Alzheimer's disease. The culmination of their bond is beautifully illustrated when Anneliese recounts bringing humor into their strained relationship by sharing a story of her vegetable antics, which elicited laughter from Bill even in his condition.

Key Insights:

• The dynamic challenges and eventual bonding in stepfather-stepchild relationships.
• The role of humor and shared experiences in healing and forming deep connections.
• The impact of parental substitutes in providing emotional stability.

Dori Samadzai Bonner: A Daughter’s Witness to Her Father’s Turmoil

Timestamp: 38:34 – 56:37

Dori Samadzai Bonner provides a gripping account of her family's harrowing escape from war-torn Afghanistan to the United States. Growing up during the Russian occupation, Dori grapples with her father’s mysterious absences and the harsh realities of war, including bombings that brought constant fear to her childhood.

Upon escaping to the U.S. with forged papers, Dori's family is granted temporary asylum, but their sense of security is shattered during an immigration appointment that nearly results in deportation. Faced with the possibility of becoming traitors, Dori becomes the family's translator, navigating the tense and demeaning interactions with immigration officials.

Notable Quote:

“Through my children, my two-year-old son and my unborn child, I will make sure that this gratitude that overflows in my heart every single day will continue to live on long after I am gone.”
— Dori Samadzai Bonner [54:24]

The climax of Dori’s story occurs during a courtroom confrontation where her father, under immense stress, reveals the physical and emotional scars inflicted by the communist regime. This brave and vulnerable act of sharing his painful history persuades the judge to grant their asylum, allowing Dori’s family to remain in the United States.

Reflecting on her journey, Dori emphasizes the significance of securing a safe and hopeful future for her children, symbolizing her unwavering gratitude and determination to honor her family’s resilience.

Key Insights:

• The profound impact of war and displacement on familial relationships.
• The emotional burdens of immigration and the fight for asylum.
• The intergenerational commitment to securing a better future.

Conclusion

The Moth Radio Hour: Fathers masterfully weaves together diverse narratives that highlight the multifaceted nature of fatherhood and paternal relationships. From overcoming personal fears to honoring ancestral legacies, and from navigating stepfather dynamics to surviving the trials of immigration, each story underscores the resilience, love, and profound impact that fathers and paternal figures have on their families. Through these heartfelt and transformative tales, listeners gain a deeper appreciation for the complexities and enduring bonds that define the paternal role.

Production Credits

• Host/Producer: Jay Allison
• Directors: Katherine Burns, Maggie Sino
• Directorial Staff: Sarah Haberman, Sarah Austin, Janess, Jennifer Hickson, Meg Bowles
• Production Support: Whitney Jones
• Recording: Argo Studios, New York City, supervised by Paul Ruest
• Music: The Drift (theme), Chandler Travis and various bands
• Funding: Corporation for Public Broadcasting, National Endowment for the Arts, John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation
• Special Thanks: Odyssey, Executive Producer Leah Rhys Dennis

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