The Moth Radio Hour: Korea, Colon, Pickups and Pranks – April 30, 2019

Hosted by Kathryn Burns, The Moth Radio Hour showcases real-life stories told by individuals on stage, without notes. This episode features four compelling narratives covering themes of identity, love, resilience, and unexpected twists.

1. Bradford Jordan: A Prank Email and Fatherhood

Timeline: [02:04] – [08:54]

Bradford Jordan opens his story with a heart-wrenching email he received two years prior. The message, purportedly from a woman named Stephanie Miller, claimed that Bradford inadvertently fathered a child during a past relationship.

• Emotional Turmoil: [02:30]

  "I immediately started crying because I think about being a dad all the time."
  Bradford recounts his initial shock and emotional breakdown upon reading the email while visiting his father in California.

• Father-Son Bond: [05:10]

  "He took me to the talking couch and held me the same way he always had."
  Seeking solace, Bradford turns to his father, who reassures him by examining the details of the email, suspecting it might be a scam. Despite the father's skepticism, Bradford experiences a profound moment of unconditional love for the potential child: "...the moment where I felt sane... boundless and limitless love for this kid." [07:20]

• April Fools' Revelation: [07:47] The situation takes a twist when Bradford informs his girlfriend about the email, only to discover it was an elaborate April Fools' prank. This false alarm forces Bradford to confront his feelings about fatherhood and his own identity, ultimately reaffirming his desire to become a father.

Insights: Bradford's story delves into the complexities of sudden life revelations and the enduring bond between father and son. It highlights how even false alarms can lead to deeper self-understanding and personal growth.

2. Charles Fatoni: Finding Love Later in Life

Timeline: [10:05] – [18:22]

Charles Fatoni shares his journey of discovering love unexpectedly at the age of 37, a time when he least anticipated finding a life partner.

• Post-Relationship Reflection: [10:20] After a long-term relationship ends, Charles feels reluctant to seek new companionship, desiring someone his own age. Encouraged by a friend, he decides to visit a gay bar, leading to a serendipitous encounter.

• Serendipitous Meeting: [13:00] Charles meets Terry, a younger man working as a nurse's aide and aspiring opera singer. Their connection is immediate despite the age difference:

  "In that crowd, he looked like a dish of vanilla ice cream."
  This vivid description underscores the purity and simplicity of their initial interaction.

• Blossoming Relationship: [14:02] Their relationship progresses naturally, culminating in a surprise proposal and a heartfelt vision of their future together:

  "Look, that's us in 20 years... May we live that long." [17:45]

Insights: Charles's narrative emphasizes that love can emerge at any stage of life, often when least expected. It celebrates the courage to embrace new beginnings and the beauty of finding a soulmate who enriches one's life.

3. Dana Stahm: Navigating Identity and Family Acceptance

Timeline: [22:20] – [34:12]

Dana Stahm presents a deeply personal account of her struggles with sexual identity, familial rejection, and eventual acceptance.

• Adopted Identity: [22:30] Dana, adopted from Korea, grapples with her place in a predominantly white upbringing. She discusses the internal conflict between wanting to fit in and embracing her heritage:

  "I almost thought that I was white myself."

• Coming Out Journey: [28:00] during college, Dana falls in love with a woman named Cynthia. Her initial coming out to her mother is met with hostility and rejection:

  "You are not my daughter." [27:15]
  This traumatic experience exacerbates her depression, highlighting the painful repercussions of not being accepted by one's own family.

• Reconnecting with Birth Family: [32:45] An unexpected search by her birth mother leads Dana to Korea, where she meets her biological family. Despite fears of rejection, Dana experiences a surprising revelation when her oldest birth sister also identifies as being in a same-sex relationship:

  "She considers us to be the same." [34:00]

Insights: Dana's story is a testament to resilience and the quest for self-acceptance. It underscores the importance of authentic relationships and the unexpected ways in which understanding and acceptance can manifest, even from unlikely sources.

4. Andy Borowitz: A Colon Catastrophe

Timeline: [35:15] – [52:19]

Andy Borowitz brings humor to a harrowing medical ordeal involving multiple colon surgeries and unexpected complications.

• Initial Symptoms and Misdiagnosis: [35:50] Andy describes his escalating abdominal issues leading to a misdiagnosis of distention. The repeated underestimation of his condition by medical staff adds a comedic twist to his suffering.

• Sigmoid Volvulus Diagnosis: [40:00] Finally diagnosed with a twisted colon, Andy faces a tough decision between high-risk emergency surgery and a less invasive procedure:

  "Shove the camera up my ass. Let's go." [40:30]
  His blunt acceptance of the colonoscopy option highlights his pragmatic and humorous approach to adversity.

• Surgical Complications and Recovery: [45:00] Post-surgery, Andy encounters a series of complications, including a leaking colon and additional emergency surgeries. Despite the dire circumstances, he maintains his comedic perspective:

  "He tweets to me, only three months." [48:15]
  His interaction with the stoic surgeon, Dr. Ho, further adds to the dark humor of the situation.

• Life Lessons: [51:00] Reflecting on his near-death experience, Andy shares profound insights about cherishing life and appreciating the present moment:

  "I do two things. I look out the window... I look at my beautiful wife sleeping next to me and I realize at that moment that I've got today and I have everything."

Insights: Andy’s tale blends humor with tragedy, illustrating how laughter can be a powerful coping mechanism in the face of life-threatening challenges. It serves as a reminder to value each day and find joy amidst chaos.

Conclusion

This episode of The Moth Radio Hour masterfully weaves together diverse narratives that explore the human experience's multifaceted nature. From Bradford's false paternity scare and Charles's unexpected love to Dana's battle with identity and Andy's medical misadventures, each story offers unique insights into resilience, acceptance, and the unpredictable twists life can take.

Notable Quotes:

• Bradford Jordan:
  "[...] a moment where I felt sane." [07:20]
• Charles Fatoni:
  "Look, that's us in 20 years. May we live that long." [17:45]
• Dana Stahm:
  "She considers us to be the same." [34:00]
• Andy Borowitz:
  "Shove the camera up my ass. Let's go." [40:30]
  "I have everything." [51:00]

Final Thoughts: The episode underscores the power of storytelling in fostering connection and understanding. Each storyteller's vulnerability invites listeners to empathize and reflect on their own lives, embodying The Moth's mission to celebrate truth through personal narratives.

For more stories and to listen to this episode, visit themoth.org or find The Moth on major podcast platforms.