268: #268 Comedy Cowboys ft. Henry Cho & John Crist

Summary

---

The Nateland Podcast

Episode 268: Comedy Cowboys ft. Henry Cho & John Crist

Original air date: September 3, 2025
Hosts: Nate Bargatze, Brian Bates, Aaron Weber
Guests: Henry Cho, John Crist

---

Overview

This lively episode of Nateland dives deep into the world of comedy, originality, the evolution of stand-up as an art form, and uniquely American cowboy and rodeo culture. Nate, Brian, and Aaron are joined by veteran comics Henry Cho and John Crist for wide-ranging, hilarious conversation. The group explores the quirks of joke theft, parallel thinking, how stand-up works at the arena level, nostalgia for “real work,” and the line between the myth and reality of cowboys. Along the way, they trade road stories, share advice for new comics and golfers, and examine why obsessions – from power-washing video games to running with the bulls – matter.

The tone is casual, self-deprecating, and quick-witted, fitting the chemistry between comics who know and rib each other well.

---

Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. [00:47] – Introductions & Recent Shows

• Hosts/guests exchange banter about the lineup, with John Crist humorously explaining, "I wasn't invited to this. I was just here." (00:07)
• Nate and the crew plug upcoming comedian showcases and tapings, notably Ryan Hamilton’s Netflix special.

---

2. [02:25] – Jokes, Joke Theft & Parallel Thinking

• Brian relates a military tour bit, sparking riffing about how certain jokes feel “stolen” but are often just common ground.
• Henry Cho on his joke becoming a viral meme:

  “A couple weeks ago, my wife got her identity stolen, but the guy's spending less money. I'm going to let it ride.” — Henry Cho (05:55)
  Discusses how it spread far and wide, out of his control.

• Gilbert Gottfried's legendary twist on “I just flew in…” is retold and praised for making an old joke original (03:29).
• Parallel thinking vs. outright theft:

  “It's more parallel thinking than anything.” — Henry Cho (04:44)

• Role of cadence and delivery in making a joke unique to a performer.

  “Their style and the way they tell a joke... that's the secret sauce that makes everything funny for a person.” — Nate (05:06)

---

3. [07:01] – Internet, AI, and Declining Joke Origination

• How memes, AI, and virality compress the pool of true joke creators:

  “The origination of the idea is less and less and less people.” — John Crist (07:29)

• ChatGPT writing for preachers and comedians:

  “Every pastor is like using ChatGPT... and they're all coming up with the exact same sermon.” — John Crist (07:41)

---

4. [09:32] – Stand-Up Style, The Arena Era & Comedy as an “Event”

• Nate details his journey from clubs to arenas:

  “There was never a leap. It was always like, I just went to the next thing. It was like a slow build into it.” (19:52)

• Adapting performance for the round, cameras, and large audiences:

  "You gotta come do it… it can feel very intimate in, like, a club. Even though it's big and it's a lot of people, you're just kind of in it.” — Nate (21:33)

• On openers having to be real headliners:

  “Your openers got to be able to be headliners on their own.” — Nate (20:25)
  “If they'll stand for him, I'm guaranteed. That's how hot this crowd is.” — Henry Cho (23:09)

• Arena shows are dissected, including the difference in pacing, camera work, and delivery needed to succeed in the format.

  “I was going to say it's almost performance art. Because you're moving.” — Henry Cho (24:33)

---

5. [31:36] – Prop Comedy, Magicians, and The Risks

• A hilarious segment on prop comics, Carrot Top, and disasters:

  “Carrot Top had to cancel the Tonight Show… because my act burned. He had no act.” — Henry Cho (31:36)

• The risk in relying on props:

  “It's a risk. I'm willing to take it.” — John Crist (32:20)
  “We always have it to have backups.” — Henry Cho (32:23)

---

6. [33:44] – The Process: Building, Trimming, and Burning Material

• How bits evolve before and after specials, frustration of material “burnout”:

  “Sometimes the beginning, you're like, dude, I got 16 months out of this joke.” — John Crist (34:14)

• Advice from comedy elders:

  “You take a two minute bit and you stretch it to four, and then you make it two again.” — Henry Cho (35:00)

---

7. [41:16] – Rapidfire: Golf Advice, Weather Disasters, and Earthquakes

• Advice for young golfers:

  “Play fast; don’t take your score super serious… If you play fast, you play with anybody you ever want to play with.” — Nate (41:48)

• Earthquakes vs. tornadoes:

  “There's nowhere to go. It was the most helpless feeling I've ever had in my life.” — Nate (47:58)

• Brian and Henry’s wild earthquake/tornado stories, including a tension-breaking punchline about running outside without pants (45:06).

---

8. [50:58] – “Fantasy” Cowboys, Dude Ranches, and the Allure of Hard Work

• John Crist shares about visiting a dude ranch:

  “I'm a comedian. Got my hands dirty and so you went in.” — Brian, teasing John (52:18)

• The concept of paying to do "real work" for fun, like cattle drives, power washing, and even mowing lawns.

  “When do you think the era of doing things for fun, like camping, began? People used to camp to live.” — John (53:22)

• The hosts riff on pressure washing video games and the satisfaction of completing simulated manual labor:

  “I have a video game where I pressure wash. Pressure washing video.” — Aaron (56:02) “That's like redneck Minecraft right there.” — Henry (56:08)

---

9. [61:12] – Addiction, Obsession, and Video Games

• Discussion of how obsessions can be positive or negative:

  "I wish I could get addicted to something that's like working out." — Nate (63:27)

• John shares a story about a real MLB pitcher getting addicted to MLB video games:

  “He would go to Walmart, buy a TV and an Xbox, play, stay up three nights in a row… and then leave it.” — John (59:21)

• How real-life success and fantasy addictions intersect; gaming as escapism.

---

10. [64:18] – Cowboy Attire, Tools, and Rodeo Lore

• Cowboy hats, chaps, spurs, boots, and practical uses:

  “Cowboy hats… it's always when I'm outside doing stuff. And it's about weather, sun. If it's raining, I wear a cowboy hat.” — Henry Cho (66:07)

• Functionality leads into style, identity, and status; the difference between real cowboys and "drugstore cowboys."
• History and function of rodeo events, lassoing, and bull riding.

  “The main wrangler though… had a lasso… In case something went awry…” — John (67:23)

• Explanation of rodeo rules, random bull draws, and the judging system.

  “You get judged though on the bull as well.” — Brian (71:07)

• The (now) infamous way bulls are made to buck:

  “They cinch them. Their testicles… that's why they're going nuts.” — John Crist (71:52)

---

11. [73:03] – The Running of the Bulls & Chasing Thrills

• On running with the bulls as “ultimate adrenaline”:

  “There's no higher high than that.” — John Crist (77:07)

• Debate about why humans chase danger, from roller coasters to Everest.
• Exploring archetypes: Cowboys, astronauts, and fighter pilots as American icons.

---

12. [83:13] – Westerns, Outlaws & American Myth

• The real vs. Hollywood cowboy debate:

  “Billy the Kid, Jesse James… Are they cowboys? Not really.” — Brian (81:41) “Famous cowboys… John Wayne… He probably did all that riding… four packs a day.” — Henry (82:21)

• Hosts admit most haven't gotten into Westerns; discuss why the genre resonated in the past versus now.
• Origins of Wild West shows & Buffalo Bill Cody; lasting influence on sports (Buffalo Bills, Ravens).

---

Timestamps for Notable Segments

• 00:47 Introductions and line-up jokes
• 03:29 Legendary joke structure (Gilbert Gottfried)
• 05:55 Henry’s viral meme joke story
• 07:41 AI, ChatGPT and the decline of real joke origination
• 13:44 Stand-up as an event, arena logistics
• 21:33 Arena intimacy, audience engagement with cameras
• 23:09 & 23:43 On openers and crowd energy
• 31:36 Carrot Top's act burning, the risk of prop comedy
• 34:14 Joke “mileage” and last-minute rewrites
• 41:48 Golf advice, etiquette
• 47:58 Earthquakes vs. Tornadoes: Helplessness
• 52:18 John’s (fantasy) cowboy experience
• 56:02 Obsessive satisfaction in pressure washing video games
• 59:21/61:12 MLB pitcher addicted to MLB The Show
• 66:07 Authentic cowboy gear and style
• 71:52 Bull riding, and what really makes bulls buck
• 77:07 The thrill of Running of the Bulls
• 81:41 Who were the “real” cowboys?
• 84:13 Annie Oakley, Buffalo Bill, and western folklore

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "It's more parallel thinking than anything." — Henry Cho (04:44)
• "Your openers have to be real headliners." — Nate (20:25)
• "You realize how different people's cadences are and how much you're in your own cadence." — Brian (12:11)
• "I wish I could get addicted to something that's like working out." — Nate (63:27)
• "I'm a comedian. Got my hands dirty." — Brian, ribbing John about cattle drive vacation (52:18)
• "Pressure washing simulator... That's like redneck Minecraft right there." — Henry (56:08)
• "Running with the bulls… there's no higher high than that." — John Crist (77:07)
• "Cowboys, astronauts, fighter pilots… now it's pressure washer." — Aaron & Henry, on pop culture icons (85:46)

---

Closing & Upcoming Shows

• Nate discusses prepping to host the Emmys:

  “I feel much better knowing that I’ve done that kind of thing. I want to do me and I think we have the right team around helping me and we got...a couple ideas that are pretty different.” (95:47)

• Plugs for upcoming shows: Henry in Shreveport, Milwaukee, Chicago; Aaron in Phoenix and Denver; John on a 25-city tour (99:41-101:09)

---

Summary

This episode is a masterclass in loose, behind-the-scenes comedy conversation, peppered with nostalgia, real-world advice, and meta-commentary about performing in the modern era. The blend of serious topics – artistic originality, career transitions, addiction, and even livestock physiology – with the crew’s comic timing makes for an entertaining, insightful, and relatable listen.

A recommended listen for fans of comedy history, stand-up process, Americana, and anyone who’s ever wondered what REALLY happens at the intersection of work, play, and obsession.

---

Transcript

[A]

Natland is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Pay Progressive Casualty Insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations.

[B]

Hello, folks and hey, Bear. Welcome to the Nate Land podcast on Nate Bargetsi, Brian Bates, Aaron Weber and and for a good time, filling in for Dusty, Henry Cho and John Chris.

[C]

Takes two of us.

[D]

Well, John wouldn't leave.

[E]

He back.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I wasn't invited to this.

[C]

You were. We know.

[E]

Yeah, I was just here.

[C]

Trust me, we know.

[E]

I'm waiting on the open.

[D]

You just never got up from last week.

[B]

What's too good of a hang, though? Like, it was like, we're all here. You're like, well, I should be hanging out.

[A]

Yeah, stick around.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, we should do this.

[B]

A couple Nateland presents to showcase season three is here. Tune in the Nateland YouTube channel for the premiere of Jeremy Adler Alder. Right. Alder. Jeremy Alder. Showcase premieres this Friday night, September 5th. Also, we're taping Ryan Hamilton's Netflix special two shows October 4th at the Neptune theater in Seattle. There's some tickets left for the 7 and some tickets for the 9:30 as well. Come out to that. It's going to be an awesome, awesome taping. Ryan is unbelievable. So. All right. We really, you know, we weren't anywhere because we're. Yeah, well, we. We had Labor Day.

[D]

I was in Chicago.

[B]

Oh, that's right. We were pre recording this. So I'm.

[D]

I'm actually going to Chicago.

[B]

Went about the way you thought. Yeah.

[A]

Sold out. Standing out.

[B]

Yep. Normal. Typical. Yep.

[C]

Chicago and Labor Day. That's good.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Well, I mean, where.

[C]

And, and where was this show in Labor Day?

[D]

Zany's.

[C]

Oh, good for you, man. It was sold out.

[D]

National Guard came in.

[C]

I did hear that.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

National Guard. Yeah. They're talking about for looking for ice.

[D]

How about that?

[E]

That's a different thing.

[B]

They go.

[C]

Two separate things.

[B]

They go. We hear Brian Bates's show sold out. He goes. I'll tell you. I bet I know what it is.

[D]

It's a lot of ice. Agents.

[E]

Agents.

[B]

Oh, no, yeah. No, I wasn't.

[E]

We weren't saying the agents.

[B]

Yeah. Why he does shows for. He'll do shows for anybody.

[D]

I will.

[B]

Brian Bates. That's your new tour.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

My border is wide open. Come on in the show.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah, I think I did. I think I had a joke about that. I did a. A military tour for the troops in the Middle east. And I was like, well, who's troops?

[B]

They were like, let's do a joke. Like, yeah, I would say that's my joke.

[C]

Bob Hope did that joke.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know.

[E]

I thought it was the first. That was the first.

[B]

Yeah. That's everybody after.

[C]

After Steve Allen, everybody did that joke.

[A]

I wrote, boy, are my arms tired. I wrote that.

[B]

You know.

[C]

You know Gilbert Garfrey's joke about that, right?

[E]

No, it is.

[C]

Have you ever heard this?

[B]

I mean, maybe.

[C]

So, Gilbert, can you do it in his voice? That's what I'm getting ready to do. So Gilbert goes, henry, you got to come down. I got. I wrote this joke. So we all go down. He goes, ladies and gentlemen, I. I was in Dallas, Texas, when John F. Kennedy got shot. Died right in my arms. I was in Memphis when Dr. Martin Luther King got shot. Died right in my arms. Ladies and gentlemen, I just flew here from Jonestown, and, boy, are my arms tired. Greatest joke ever.

[B]

Yeah. To be able to do. To do something so different. That's why, like, on. Just that. It's, like, perfect. Yeah. Yeah. It's unbelievable. Oh, it was.

[C]

We were all in the back, just going, God, he's so good.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Just.

[E]

I never had the. I never had the, like, the guts to say, someone stole my joke. I don't have that much confidence in my, you know, people.

[D]

I said it to you.

[B]

But.

[E]

Yeah, no, people have. But I feel like, hey, that's my joke. If it's something, like, very surface level like that, you're like, I'm not.

[B]

I don't believe stealing is as much as people think. We're all.

[E]

That's what I say about the same joke.

[C]

It's more parallel thinking than anything.

[E]

But it's kind of arrogant to say.

[C]

Now when it's verbatim, you kind of go, hey, hang on.

[E]

Now.

[A]

If a white guy goes up and goes, I was born and raised in Knoxville, Tennessee, and I'm Korean.

[C]

Yeah, that would be something which I have done, Chicago. And it's the only one that worked.

[B]

Right.

[D]

I do it whenever I'm not with Henry.

[B]

That's right. Okay. Cadence is what you gotta. Cadence. I think people take people's cadence, right? Their style. Their style and the way they tell a joke. Cause that's the secret sauce that makes everything funny for a person is kind of how they deliver a joke and a punch.

[C]

Yeah. And I mean. Cause Norm MacDonald would say, Totally different than Gilbert, than you. And then I. You know, and then Bates would throw his version in. I'm kidding.

[E]

You think you're.

[C]

So here's the thing, though, with the Internet, you know, like, one of my jokes has become a meme, and some guy just put it out there. And I actually had some random woman in the grocery store came out, goes, hey, I heard a joke you should maybe try. And I said, what is it? And she told me. And I go, you know that's mine, right?

[B]

I started like, what was it?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

A couple of weeks ago, my wife got her identity stolen, but the guy's spending less money. I'm going to let it ride.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

And so that was.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Right. Yeah.

[C]

And I mean, gosh, I don't know, 20 years ago.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And now it's a meme. And I mean, people.

[E]

I like, this guy's funny. You're like, that's.

[B]

Yeah. That's where stuff is getting stolen.

[E]

That's where stuff.

[C]

Yeah. By non professionals.

[B]

By non. Prof. Yeah. Meme.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Movies. Yeah. Movies are another.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

What do you mean?

[C]

And commercials.

[B]

Yes, commercials. I mean, that Brian Regan that got that one joke with Brian. The commercial. YouTube. Yeah. Is insane.

[E]

Oh, yeah, he started that. Yeah, yeah. Dude. I heard, I heard.

[B]

I'm not even saying that another person might not have come up with that, but the. So it's. You could even say, like, maybe they didn't steal it intentionally. But when that joke is so associated with one person.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

That's when it's like, all right, like.

[E]

That'S a great way to put it.

[B]

It's almost. You could tell me, look, I didn't intentionally. Still, you're like, that's fine, but you're going to pay for something.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Because that's, like, too crazy of a thing he said.

[E]

I think I heard it say with like, AI. And with the. Where the Internet is going now that the people with the origination. That's what we were talking about, the last pod is like, it's hard to write jokes. It's hard to write jokes.

[C]

Right.

[E]

And then there's like, somebody that takes it, does a voiceover of it, does an audio of it, and then podcast reacts to it. Like, all the origination is getting is less and less people because all those advertising agencies are looking at the stuff that's already on the Internet. They're not Coming up with the new. It's all.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

The origination of the idea is less and less and less people.

[B]

Because now, like, there's no creative. There's people are less and less creative.

[E]

Dude, with every pastor is like using ChatGPT.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

They were like, what are five characteristics about David and Goliath that these people wouldn't know? And they're all coming up with.

[C]

It's like the exact same, sir.

[E]

None of it is. Is original. That's what I was saying. The Brian Regan joke was so original, but now it's in the lexicon of like. Everybody does that. Everybody says that now. But yeah, he was the first guy.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Just to make it.

[C]

He thought.

[E]

Observation. He thought. He thought of that and now it's everywhere. Like, bless your heart. Is that now everybody says that but somebody. It was the first person.

[B]

John Reed.

[E]

Was it.

[C]

But then there's tons.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

John Reap.

[B]

I don't know. John Reap. Say it. I just said that because I thought it was John Reef. Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Have you ever thought somebody stole your joke?

[B]

No, I don't think I've ever would have given it any weight if. If, you know, I had one. When I talk about shaking the baby and I joke, there's some comics came and did a joke about that, but I never think they stole it. They had a baby and a comic had a baby, and so they went and saw what I saw and wrote a joke about a comic having a baby. Yeah. And so it was never. No, they didn't take it from me. I could tell. I always looked at it. I remember someone saying once is like, if you steal a joke or if someone stole your joke, it's like, you. Then you gotta write one.

[E]

Yeah, it should be better.

[B]

And then. And so any joke that I had that was like somewhat stolen, it was usually a pretty broad topic where it was like, you know what? Yeah, I could see it. But again, if my. It would be like, my dad's a magician and clown and blah, blah, whatever you're like, then it would have been more obvious. But if you put yourself in the story, you're not putting yourself. I mean, I'm just. In my stories, I'm talking about myself kind of evolving, revolving around me. It's almost like you can't.

[E]

Can't take it.

[B]

Take it. And then you're just doing your. Your Persona and then, you know.

[C]

Right. It's. It's. It's.

[B]

It's you.

[C]

It's you not even telling the joke. It's just how you would tell a story.

[B]

They're buying a ticket, right? Like, that's the difference.

[E]

Who's the most stealable comic on this tier, on here, of all five of.

[B]

Us, Henry's got the most materials.

[D]

Yeah, that's.

[C]

Yeah, but. And, yeah, I mean, just through the.

[E]

Years, it's there just. Yeah, but.

[C]

But. But Trust me, about 80% is not worth stealing. Maybe 85.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

And then 5% of that's Asian, so there's 10% of my accuracy.

[D]

That's what I take.

[C]

So actually, I have the least am. You can actually still. But you. So, you know, the old guys out, you know, I brought up Bob Hope and those guys. Those guys used to tell each other's jokes when they would go these. Do these casinos and things, you know, because some guys were in New York, some guys were in Vegas, some guys were in la, and they would just tell each other's jokes, and it wasn't a big deal because there wasn't television. They didn't go on the radio to promote. And.

[E]

Did you ask? You ask or no, you just do it.

[C]

I think they just kind of did. You know, I was.

[E]

That's crazy.

[C]

I was. You know, I've been very blessed meeting these old guy heroes back in the day, you know, And I got to meet Milton Burrow, and I was talking to Uncle Milty about this, and he goes, oh, yeah. You know, when I did Catskills, I did part of mine. I did a little bit of Bob, I did a little bit of. And I'm like, okay. He goes, you know, kind of how singers do cover tunes. That's kind of how we did it.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

And I joke with musicians all the time going, you know. You know, I'll do the Opry and somebody will do three songs, not one of them theirs. And I go, you know, I'm gonna go out and do five minutes of Cosby, five minutes of Seinfeld, and then two minutes of mine.

[B]

How's that?

[C]

And they're like, what? You can't do that. I go, yeah, yeah, you're right. I can't do that. Yeah, yeah, but you just sang, you know, Devil Went down to Georgia.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

So, yeah, yeah. I think in Vegas, they were. Somebody was workshopping, like, a comedy karaoke. But then they were like, racially, it would get a little tricky, but you're.

[B]

Like, play the Chris Rock.

[C]

That'd be great.

[E]

You're like, look up, look up. The Jim Gaffigan. But you could scroll through and then you do the bit.

[B]

Yeah, they have that at the Comedy Museum.

[E]

They do.

[B]

Yeah, they have a carry. They. You go and put like a Seinfeld bit in it. Then you stand on stage and it shows you the words and you read it in their cadence.

[E]

Wow.

[C]

But it's. But it's. But it's. Yeah, but it's not his voice. You're.

[B]

It's your voice doing his joke. So you got to really know their ca. Like, I was able to. I could do Seinfelds because I just had. I had that CD memorized and. But it's. Yeah. You realize it's an interesting thing to even do as a comic because you realize how different people's cadences are and you realize how much you're in your own cadence that it's hard to kind of come out of it.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

It'd be fun to see you do like Earthquake or something like that.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Just to see Bruce.

[A]

Bruce.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it's like I, I just saying it. Reading it would be tough. I mean, maybe if I could look at the joke and be like, all right, let me do this joke and like, write it the way I would have to write it a way that I would say it. Because that's the. There's a lot of stuff that you. The way you write it, you're like, ah. You're like, I gotta. You know, it's like when someone gives you a tag or something, you're like, look, that's very funny. I. I'm not going to.

[E]

I was going to say that. I wouldn't say that. Yeah.

[B]

I just can't say it.

[C]

But, but the. But at the museum, that's more. Is it. Is that for comedians to go in and try for.

[B]

No, no, no. It's more just.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. Patrons.

[B]

Got it. Yeah, got it. And I just did it because we were there. But. Yeah. The fun thing about stand up comedy, Stand up comedy, it's. Again, I was, I was tell. It is. It's a very newish art form. The fact that you even met Milton Burl is insane. Like the. But that's how new it is, Right. You know Cosby's still alive, right?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

So you're in the form that we know. Stand up. I know it was around all the blah, blah, whatever, but the form of how we kind of know it. I mean, would it be Cosby is kind of like the fur. Like, he talked about his family. Yeah. Made personal observation. Observation. And I'm sure there's people I'm missing. But in that general scheme of the years of when that was.

[E]

That's not that long ago I saw him in college.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

20 years.

[B]

And then. So if you see where we're at now with stand up, it's kind of becoming its own kind of thing where it's like you're. You're almost gonna. You're almost gonna get, I think, get to see music. The way music got hot.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Is you're going to be able to see stand up, where. Stand up is going to be looked at as music, where people are going to try to find someone very young, maybe new, and they want to just see them develop and watch them along the way. But stand up comedy is. Is in a different place than it's ever been. And that's what's so fun about the biggest.

[E]

When I. I mean, I've been stand up for 15 years.

[B]

I mean, you're doing like, look, we're all just doing stand up comedy now. We're doing this podcast, but in the.

[C]

No. We make a living telling jokes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And that was. Not everybody could do that.

[E]

No.

[C]

Back in the day, very few. And the difference nowadays than like the big wave in the 80s, early 90s, when people would go to a comedy club just to go see comedy. And then a lot of people, we all blame my generation, we blamed it on oversaturation of television because we were on every night and there are so many opportunities to be on TV that people stopped going to clubs. And then, you know, Seinfeld, Roseanne, Tim Allen, all these guys got their own TV shows. So all of a sudden there was only a handful of comics out there that had a name that was even semi recognizable. And so guys, you know, I was fortunate. Brian Regan, Jake Johansson, probably Bobby Slayton just got over the hump. And we could still bring a crowd into a comedy club, but no one else could because no one heard of you. And the newness of, hey, let's go to the comedy club was gone, but now it's back. There are people who go come here to Zany's just to go see a comedy show. They're not going to go see Brian Bates just because Brian Bates is here. They're just going to come.

[B]

I mean, when we do this Monday Nateland Live show is you don't know who's on the lineup. They just come and then and they do new material, Zany's, and you don't know who's online. So, I mean, people are starting to.

[D]

Yeah, I was on the Zany's All Star show here this past Saturday.

[C]

You're an All Star.

[D]

Well, no, but I was on the show and 845, great crowd. They didn't know who was on lineup. But there's.

[E]

There.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

They just go, yeah. So you're right, Nate. There is a new attitude towards comedy.

[B]

Look at sports. It's the way I think stand up. You're going to see it kind of change with, you know, a sports where it was like this thing, and then it's evolving into this newish thing where it can probably start getting broken up into. You know, there's going to be entertainers and there's going to be. Because with the Internet, you got all these different personalities, but it's still going to have to come back to that. Can you create an act? Can you. To me to buy a ticket to. And come and be happy and satisfied and enjoy the show.

[C]

Right. But it has become an event where it wasn't always in an event.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I mean, look what you're doing. Yeah, yeah, look what you're doing. Your show is an event for that many people to go and show up and park and go up an escalator. I never thought I'd ever hear of anyone having to take an escalator to go see a comedy show unless it was in a mall.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, okay.

[E]

We've been there.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

That's what. Yeah. Like when you like Seinfeld, Like, I remember Seinfeld telling me with Yakov Smirnoff, he was like, open for him and a theater and 3,000 people, and he's like, I just couldn't. You know, that would be like doing Madison Square Garden. Like, it was like, no one saw a comedian in a theater.

[C]

No, it was crazy. No one could see you, and you felt like you couldn't. I remember touring with Reba McIntyre back in the 90s. We're doing 12,000 people outside.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And, you know, unfortunately, I had to go out first and it was still daylight, so there's no imac. They hear my last minute. They could barely see me on the screens. And, you know, I was just up there just taking one on the chin for the paycheck and saying, I opened for Tour de re McIntyre. But it was. It was too many people, you know, And, I mean, I commend you because, you know, I. I haven't gone to an arena show ever, and it's nothing. I just, you know, heck, we're both busy. It's not like I can follow you on tour, but I don't even know how you do it. I wouldn't know how to do it to me and where my being and my creativity and what the way I do it. I mean, it's just like you just said Seinfeld. I mean, that's the whole generational thing. I think I told you before, we went and saw Steve Martin at Universal Amphitheater. Bunch of comedians, Larry Miller and all these guys, Dennis Wilberg. And we're like going, how do you do that? How do you do a room this big? You know, we were doing 300 seat comedy clubs.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Every night. And that's all we knew. And then at the theaters you do. Yeah, okay, maybe there's 500 or maybe there's 700. Okay, that we can handle. But then you get into the 3,000. You know, when Foxworthy started the Blue Collar tour, you know, Jeff was selling 2000, Engvall was selling 1500. Then he. And both of them went and did a show and all of a sudden they could sell 5,000.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And both of them were like going, but that room is so big. It's so big because just, you know, the generational generation I came up in, that's just so big. I mean, if I do 2000, you.

[E]

Sound like the NBA. You're like, dude, in the 90s, you're like, yeah, but that was different.

[C]

Yeah, we wore bigger shorts.

[E]

Yeah, it was a different comedy.

[B]

It was the round is big in the arena. So being in the middle is what, like I. When I did end stage, for me, how. What helped was I just had to go through every single phase. So there was never a leap. It was always like, I just went to the next thing. And so it was like a slow build into it. So you're able to kind of like wrap my head around more and more. The arenas are intense. I would agree. You can't have you really. Your openers got to be able to be headliners on their own. Right. Like, you cannot put people too young up there.

[C]

Right.

[B]

They cannot handle it. Especially you're in the round now. The round helps a lot when you're in the round. And we got it set up now where we got these. I've made the stage a circler. I've gotten the screens bigger for people. I gotta make sure the audio's everywhere. So it's this setup that I want you to feel like you're watching a live special taping. And what's fun about the cameras is, look, if you're in a, you know, if you're in a 2,000 seat theater, if you're in the back, I can't see your face.

[C]

Right.

[B]

So it. Screens help. No matter what you're going to be in. Well, with this, the screens, you just embrace it. And I mean, I just play into those screens and you get laughs off looks that I never got.

[A]

You can play smaller than you can even. Even at a club.

[B]

Yeah, it's going to laugh. It's crazy to get a laugh sometimes. And you're like, why are they laughing? And. Because I'm just used to, like, I always make that face, but no one can see that face. Right. And then. But now, because of the way I'm doing it into this camera, it's just. You hear this pop and you're like, o, dude, this. Like, it just adds so much. So much. You got to come do it, like, because you. I mean, you see it where it's this.

[D]

It's.

[B]

It's awesome. I would like y', all, because that's like, I do like seeing some of the. The guys, the older guys to be like. I would like y' all to come see it to be. Because it's that idea. Everybody thinks you can't do it in this world. You can. It's. It. It's like. I mean, they're just on you. It can feel very intimate in, like a club. Even though it's big and it's a lot of people, but you gotta. You're just kind of in it and you're make your little circle and stuff and. But people have to be real headliners. I mean, you cannot. That's like the idea of young comics. I mean, newer con, like, it's. It's just too big. It's too big. It's too big of a situation. And I mean, honestly, I have to keep an eye on it with. We have a lot of great openers. We start with guys here and like. But it's like, I keep an eye if. If you know, because you're getting to where you're like, you can't. It's too big of a thing.

[E]

Yep.

[B]

And I want this show to be so. I want everybody to be murdering.

[C]

Right.

[B]

It's this big, big, big show. And so.

[C]

But that's the right attitude. I mean, that's how you know all the. All the guys. I mean, even Brian Regan asked me, why do I use, you know, guys like Aaron and. Well, not you, Brian, but guys like Aaron Bates.

[E]

You never called me either, brother.

[C]

All these guys just Aaron. Why are your openers so strong? I said, because I want my show to pop. I mean, I had Jake Gullage Would get up a standing O opening, you know, and people were like, that's crazy. I go, no, you don't understand. If they'll stand for him, I'm guaranteed.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's how hot this crowd is.

[B]

Yeah. You want to. Yeah.

[C]

So you want your openers.

[B]

You want to follow that. You want to follow that energy. It's like when you go up behind when it's bombing, I. It's infuriating. Well, I'm not gonna dig out of that.

[C]

I'm not self inviting. But yeah, I. I would love to come see it and.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

And if I get to be good enough headliner, I'll. Maybe I'll do it with you. If I can.

[B]

If you think, if you can figure it out. If I'll figure it out. Yeah.

[C]

How to. But, but it'd be a totally different thing. I mean, you know.

[B]

Yeah, but you, if you would know how to do it. Like, I just want you to see it and feel it and it's like, that's great. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's crazy.

[E]

Do you have a joke? Work at a, like work at a club. And then you're like, this is not gonna work in an arena.

[B]

It's bigger. I mean, like, so this special I was thinking about not. When I taped this next one, I was like, I don't know if I'm gonna tape it in arena again and whatever. Which I don't know for sure what's gonna happen, but it almost probably has to be in an arena practice. I mean, it's made me a lot bigger. I was never someone. If you put me back on a theater, I'm not going to move. If I. When I do Vegas, I kind of go back to not really moving. I stay in the middle. But when I'm in the round and I'm. And I'm just the whole time making this circle, I mean, I do so much more because it just naturally doesn't feel as you walk in a circle. Yeah. Because I'm in the round. So I just do a. I pace and I hit the cameras. But I've started. I mean, now I can hit the cameras. Like, I mean, it's awesome. It's performance.

[C]

I was going to say it's almost performance art. Because you're moving.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah. So you're not just standing there telling jokes, you're actually performing some.

[B]

I mean, now you can picture, like when I'm talking about my house or my fan. I think I can make you picture my house. You can picture me standing however I'm Standing in whatever way and.

[C]

Right.

[B]

It's, it's, I, I, it's like the most addicting thing I've ever done.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

You ever thought about a revolving stage.

[B]

And just staying there and not the stage. Let the stage do it.

[C]

That's why Dusty thought it was. Some guys thought it was.

[B]

That's that a lot of celebrity theater is the In Phoenix.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yep.

[E]

That's going to be my prop show. It's part of it.

[B]

Yeah. But you want to, like.

[C]

But you'll get dizzy. You may get dizzy.

[B]

You're going to get dizzy, then you're going to have.

[C]

And then it's not going to work.

[B]

The crowd's going to be like. Once they pass you, then they just got to sit and wait.

[C]

It's kind of like on a merry go round.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Go get some popcorn. Wait till he comes around again.

[B]

Yeah. Because I'm moving around a lot quicker than that. Like. So if you're good for you not to get dizzy. I mean, once you pass someone, you'll be 25 minutes before you.

[E]

I'll be back.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

You tell the, do you tell the openers where the cameras are or. No. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know where they are.

[B]

Yeah. Whether they use them or not. They should, but they, you know, but they got to know how to use them. That's the thing. You got to be. It's not a, it's, it's, you know who it is.

[E]

Like Joel Osteen.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

He. When he delivers. When he delivers the punchline. Not the punchline, but his. He goes, he goes, crowd, crowd. And then he goes right to the camera. Watch Joel Osteen and go right to that camera. He draws you.

[C]

That's just tv.

[E]

That's how I got saved.

[B]

Yeah, that's just TV by Joel Osteen.

[E]

No, I'm just joking. But, yeah, he makes you feel like you're.

[C]

I would give another attempt at that. No, but that's just tv.

[E]

I mean, yeah. To watch. But you've delivered the punchline right to the lens of that camera, is what you're saying.

[C]

You know where they are.

[A]

You know, if there's an act out or something, do it at the camera or facial expression.

[E]

I got a lot of. I go, hey, go down to the stool when I go to this part, you know.

[B]

Oh, you got your kid.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. He's got a lot.

[A]

Keep it on the wide shot.

[E]

They're not on a tripod.

[D]

They're on the shoulder.

[B]

You got a, you got a roamer.

[E]

Hey, I'm Gonna go to. I'm gonna go behind the stool. So really zoom in on that again.

[B]

Does that camera go outside? Yeah, my closure is outside. You gotta take the whole. So you gotta take the whole. The whole theater's gotta go outside.

[E]

Get it?

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

You know that feeling when you're a kid sitting cross legged in front of the tv, Saturday morning cartoons blasting. You're diving into a giant bowl of colorful sugary cereal.

[D]

Oh, y was my heyday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That kind of nostalgia. What if I told you that feeling never had to go away? Brian, let me introduce you to Magic Spoon, the high protein, zero sugar cereal and treats that basically rewrote the breakfast rule book. It's crazy. I'm reading this. You're the breakfast guy. Yeah, because I'm the food guy. So it's a. Yeah, it's a tough balance to strike, but it's your childhood favorite. All grown up and absolutely loaded with goodness. This is Magic Spoon. Each serving of Magic spoon cereal packs 13 grams of protein, 0 grams of sugar, and only 4 net carbs. Those numbers mean nothing to me. But it's all low. It's crunchy, it's flavorful. It comes in one of those iconic nostalgic flavors like fruity cocoa and frosted. I mean, what more do you want?

[E]

By the way? The bowl.

[A]

Because I have a magic spoon bowl where it's like a silicone.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

It's my favorite bowl.

[D]

Yeah, my daughter loves it.

[A]

It's like.

[D]

No, I'm serious.

[A]

No, it's just me and your daughter eat the same.

[D]

Yeah, it's a fun bowl.

[A]

Whether you're trying to be carb conscious or just want a simple wholesome snack that actually tastes amazing. Magic Spoon, is it. Get $5 off your next order at magicspoon.com nate or look for Magic Spoon on Amazon or in front of your. Or in your nearest grocery store. That's magicspoon.com Nate for $5 off.

[E]

Yeah, I got a new. My new show. I have a new. It's kind of a prop slash illusion.

[B]

Props.

[C]

I know. Caretop told me you were done.

[E]

What?

[C]

Chris is still in again?

[E]

Yeah, when he retires, I'm looking for an opening.

[C]

He's got a warehouse.

[B]

He's got a warehouse. Maybe you just go get his old stuff.

[E]

Yeah, I'm just gonna ease in. I think this tour.

[B]

I think it'd be. You go to Carrot Top, I think. I've never met him. Henry knows him. He's awesome.

[E]

I know him.

[B]

Yep, you know him. So go. Give me. Give Me three things.

[E]

Let me. How do I.

[C]

Give me three things from 19. 1997.

[B]

Yeah. Come on. No. Yeah, I know.

[C]

You don't do them anymore.

[A]

You don't got a toilet seat somewhere I can get.

[E]

How do I. Wait, what's my. How do I start?

[C]

It's the bat with the umbrella. Bat with the umbrella.

[B]

Yeah. Just go.

[C]

He's got a baseball bat with an.

[B]

Go to Carrot Top. I think you would just go. Give me. Give me a couple of things.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Again, 1997. Carrot tops. Carrot tops. One of the more prolific.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Entertainers of all time.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

How much stuff he makes and how often. And he's doing great. So.

[C]

But.

[B]

So. But I'm sure he's got stuff you, like. Send me to the back corner of a warehouse.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. What's. All right, let me pitch one more. Can I pitch one more? Okay. So the. The glass. It's a clear glass of water on the stool. I keep drinking out of it. It keeps filling back up because the water.

[C]

So you're a magician also.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

You just want to do magic.

[E]

Thank you, dude. That's awesome, dude.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

No, no, but it's a comedy show. The. The illusions are not the main thing. They're just, like a part of it.

[C]

You went from prop to magician?

[E]

Well, well, it's. Who's to define it?

[C]

You know what, Nate's dad does that.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Well, I'll go on tour with him.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I bet Nate's dad has some stuff you could.

[E]

If I have three things.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. My dad. You know what you could do? An easy solution. Might get hard. You're going to Vegas next week, though. You're talking next week?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

You're going to Vegas?

[E]

Yeah, I'm going to.

[A]

Let me pop around.

[B]

You actually are probably at Vegas.

[C]

Oh, you're at Vegas.

[E]

Yeah. Let me pop around to the other shows, see what's going on. I'm trying to get into.

[C]

That's what we used to do.

[E]

I'm trying to get into it.

[C]

We used to always just pop. Pop around.

[B]

Everybody go to my. You can come to my dad's house. And I. I guarantee my dad. I said, if you want to try a prop out, my dad could get you. I bet he has a prop.

[E]

Something cool. But mine's going to be different because what if I never mention it?

[B]

Well, yeah, but you need the prop. So I'm just saying don't worry about creating the prop. Just let. Let people that have done it. Here's the thing with never mentioning it. That Is everybody thinks that that never works.

[E]

It doesn't.

[B]

Because that's always. It's a very funny thing for us to talk about. And we all laugh in the moment.

[C]

And that's the only thing.

[B]

And that's the only time it's funny. Yep. And when they're out there, and then, I mean, maybe if you're lucky, 50 years from now, some guy goes, yeah, I got it.

[C]

The last thing was.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I want to be, like, a comedian's version of, like, you know, like, Taylor Swift always drops, like, little hints. Yeah. About things. I want to be that. You're like, oh, this guy's on the next level.

[C]

Good luck with that.

[B]

Really good luck.

[C]

I think. Yeah.

[E]

It starts this fall. It'll start. I'm starting to ease it in, you know.

[C]

You know, Carrot Top had to cancel the Tonight show way back when. He was. Have you ever heard this story? So he was doing the Birmingham Comedy Club, not the Stardome.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

There's a Birmingham Comedy Club. And he was supposed to do the Tonight show the following Tuesday, and he kept his trunk at the comedy club, and it burned down. So Scott calls me and goes, you and all my haters. He goes, you're not a hater. But all the guys who don't like the prop guys will love this. I go, what? He goes, I had to cancel the Tonight Show Tuesday because my act burned. He had no act he couldn't build. Rebuild the props.

[E]

That's tough.

[C]

So there you go. So just think about that.

[E]

It's a risk. I'm willing to take it.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

I'm willing to take it.

[C]

We always have it to have backups.

[B]

Yeah. Don't sit on that stool. Not that one.

[C]

Not that one.

[B]

Yeah. Not that one.

[A]

A Funny. My favorite part of that story is when Jay Leno mentioned it on the tonight's show. He made fun of the club.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

He said, like, a little rinky dink comedy club. And then he felt so bad about it that he called Bruce at Stardome and was like, I feel bad that I trashed the club. And he recorded all these radio spots for the club for free to give.

[B]

Them because he felt bad. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I love that.

[C]

Well, Jay. That's Jay. Because Jay's a comic.

[B]

Yeah, Jay's a. He is a comic.

[C]

Jay's a comic.

[B]

Yeah. All right. Read. Yes.

[A]

Let's get started.

[B]

I'm gonna see that. The Stephanie Sellers. Last time he was on the podcast, I 100 believed Henry Cho called his wife a B word and was so upset. Then I went Back and used closed captioning and was comforted to know he said best.

[C]

Wow. Yeah. The guy who's never cussed on stage in 40 years, on podcast and caller.

[E]

Seems out of character.

[B]

Well, stand up's going in a new direction.

[C]

Yeah. Hey, that's.

[A]

It's also no reaction from the rest of us either.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, we get it.

[D]

We hear you, buddy.

[C]

We've met her.

[D]

We know her.

[C]

We've met her.

[B]

Seth Lynch, I was wondering, have you ever worked on a joke forever, finally feel like you got it just right, maybe even filmed it, then after all that, you find a better way into it or make it funnier? Does that drive you nuts or is that just the way it goes and part of the process? It's the way it goes and it's part of the process. You always film it and then make it the best it's ever been.

[E]

I don't like it when you get a huge joke really close up to the special. You're like, you didn't get much mileage out of this because I only told this joke a month.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

And now it's burned. Versus sometimes the beginning. You're like, dude, I got 16 months out of this joke.

[B]

Yeah. But sometimes it's exhausting. Like, it's like, because you have it.

[E]

You don't like telling anymore. Yes.

[B]

Like, you're tired of it by the time you tape. And you're like, I haven't been telling it that long. Now I know. Like, I can get like, my. The history joke is one that I told. Whatever mold. I can't remember anything but about your surprise. The surprise.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Every history movie I watch, I watch on the edge of my seat.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

But that was a longer joke. And then I cut it down to those words. But I knew the whole time I did it, I was like, it's just too clunky. It would get a laugh. And you're like, that's too many.

[C]

But then you shortened it and it worked.

[B]

It worked perfectly. Yeah.

[C]

That's what I tell all the new guys. Well, you know this. They always. Guys go, hey, what advice? I go, well, I said, I was always told by Seinfeld and Shanling, these guys, you take a two minute bit and you stretch it to four, and then you make it two again.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Just take the best two minutes. And you know, and they're like going, what if the bits. I go, look, it's just. It's a one minute. Make it two. It's just. Yeah, 30 seconds. Make it one minute.

[B]

It's yeah.

[C]

You don't have to make every bit. Four minutes. And they're like, okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

But you don't never have any. I know you. I don't like a current events joke. It's funny that it's like, there's diminishing returns as you keep going. You're like, the event happened. And then it's like, hilarious the first week. And then it's like, all right, I gotta get.

[C]

Maybe three days.

[E]

I gotta put this on the Internet or get rid of it.

[C]

Right.

[E]

Because there's nobody.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah.

[E]

I mean, I still gotta prick. 20, 25 minutes. About COVID But I'm getting rid of. I'm getting rid of it, though. It's killing, dude. It's killing.

[C]

It's at least 28 minutes.

[E]

Yeah, it's killing.

[B]

Well, that's the most fun to get back into something when you. When you already done it. That's the best. I've always. You have a Christmas joke and it's.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Around. And it's like March. And you're like, you guys, it's about to be summer or so you, like, spring's coming. My favorite holiday, my favorite time of year.

[C]

Christmas.

[B]

I love getting back. Like, it's so funny to. Because every comic's done it. And it's just very fun to see. You know, you got.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

The Olympics.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Olympic joke that you can pull out.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Only once every four years.

[C]

Well, it's every two now, because, yeah, it would be a winter jokes, but by God, the summer Olympics are happening.

[E]

But it's.

[A]

It's like any big sporting event is a way into.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right.

[A]

So you can find.

[C]

You can segue whatever you want.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Somehow I gotta find a way to get into this. Yeah.

[B]

It's very fun.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

I always enjoy it. I like watching it, too, because it's like when it's Christmas time or something, you're like. Yeah. I mean, it's like you're dining off of it.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

And then it gets, you know, then it's like, you know, July and you're like, done work.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Trying to be like, figuring out it's too hot. Can't wait till Christmas. How would you get into. Yeah.

[E]

The neighborhood. I have a neighborhood act. Joke about the neighborhood app about Halloween.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

And I'll be like, last Halloween. Or like, Halloween's coming up the easy way. But I have a. Like a six months that you're like, how are you gonna get to Halloween here?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If you're talking about something specific that happened at Halloween.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

You could talk about that app. I would make it more broad about the app. And then you can just go, like, in Halloween. Or you just go when Halloween's around. I mean, it's a zoo. It's the. You know.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Because then you're broadly talking about it. But I know what you mean. You have to go, like, last Halloween. But when you're straight up. Yeah, like, exactly six months away from it.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

And it's December.

[E]

Like, beach. Beach humor. And it's like this December.

[B]

You gotta find out yeah's favorite holiday.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Here, Halloween in the back.

[E]

Speaking of, it's your birthday.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I was. It's always. My dad was like, dude, you say like. He's like. You say like the other day a lot in your show.

[C]

You did.

[A]

The other day was a big day. The other day was a big day.

[E]

Yeah, the other day. There's like, dude, like, you see somebody on the Tonight show, he's like, the cab on the way over here. I go, all right.

[A]

You write your Tonight show in the.

[E]

Cab on the way over here. But you can't say in a cab three months ago. So you're like.

[B]

Yeah, you just kind of. Yeah. You just kind of figure it out.

[C]

It's poetic.

[E]

We need, like, a comedy. We need, like, a comedy fact checker. Like, when did this happen?

[B]

Yeah, Well, I mean, but you can tell. I mean, I remember telling jokes about my daughter. And then you're still telling them, and then you'll be like, I mean, she's three years older than.

[E]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Trust me.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

People do. How are your kids? I go for this show there. Simple. Very simple.

[B]

That's a great.

[E]

For the show.

[B]

Yeah, that's so. But that is the best tonight. 18.

[E]

Yeah. Or like, something. Yeah, you're referencing. I think you're referencing, like, a. A style. I've. I heard a comic reference, like, dude, jeans are, like, so skinny now that you. Can I go. That will. We don't wear those jeans. Like, we don't wear that anymore. So either. Everybody's like, this is old.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

This joke is old.

[B]

No guy is noticing that someone's doing a skinny jean joke and it's out of season.

[E]

Yeah. Well, I did you. Well, I got a lot of.

[B]

Look this maniac up here, he goes, did you hear him? He said, ain't wearing skinny jeans no more.

[E]

That's why I'm moving out of stand up. I'm moving into prop comedy.

[B]

Golly.

[E]

I make a lot of Observations wearing camo pants.

[B]

Yeah, sometimes you accidentally show people stuff, like your references.

[E]

You do.

[B]

I don't think you would have done if you really would have known what was going on.

[E]

This guy's wearing moisturizer. There's no way he would wear that in April. What? Oh, you guys didn't think. Okay, never mind.

[B]

Never mind. No, didn't notice the moisturizer.

[E]

Never mind. Okay, that's fine. It's fine. It's fine. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, boy. Look at this. It's our old friends Delete Me. Delete Me makes it easy, quick, and safe to remove your personal data online at a time when surveillance and data breaches are common enough to make everyone vulnerable, including you, Brian. You're the most vulnerable. With Delete Me, you can protect your personal privacy or the privacy of your business from doxing attacks before sensitive information can be exploited. The New York Times wirecutter has named Delete Me their top pick for data removal services. I like to keep my private life private. It's very important to me. Nate and Laura have been using Delete Me way before they were a sponsor of this show. You can quickly become a victim of identity theft, harassment, and doxing, but not anymore. Take control of your data and keep your private life private by signing up for Delete Me now at a special discount for our listeners. Get 20% off your delete me plan when you go to JoinDeleteMe.com Nate and use promo code Nate at checkout. The only way to get 20% off is to go to JoinDeleteMe.com nate and enter code nate at checkout. That's JoinDeleteMe.com nate code nate.

[B]

Graham Esling. I'm 11 years old and recently started listening to the podcast with my mom and enjoy tuning in each week. I also enjoy playing golf and started playing almost three years ago. Some of you guys also play. Do you have any tips or words of wisdom for a newer golfer?

[A]

I wish Dusty was here for this one, but y' all go ahead and take it.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, just have fun.

[C]

Yeah, have fun, Graham. Just play Brian Bates or Aaron anytime.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

Build your confidence.

[A]

Well, my advice is play fast.

[C]

That's true.

[B]

Play fast. Don't take your score super. There's gonna be plenty of times to be super serious about golf.

[A]

And don't. Don't hold people up.

[B]

Yeah, Play fast is everything. Yeah, you do that, you play. Doesn't matter if you're good or bad. If you play fast, you play with anybody you ever want to play with in your whole Life just kind of move it along.

[E]

I would say that. Do you ever. I think somebody told me one time, you can tell how selfish a person is by how many times in 18 holes they touch the flagstick. Do you, like, you never attended it.

[C]

If they never touch it, they're selfish.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

They're.

[E]

You're like, dude, you never, like, hey, should I pull this?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Or like, you never, like, people hit their balls and what, you never helped another person.

[C]

Right.

[E]

I'd say when I play with those guys.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, the first time I played with Henry, he did a joke where he was like.

[B]

Like, yeah.

[A]

Did you feel the. What was the joke you made?

[C]

And you're like, yeah, how much that weighs?

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Because I didn't know you were supposed to grab it for other people. See how much that weighs.

[E]

Thanks. There you go. Yeah, that's a better way.

[C]

This is what it weighs. This is what it weighs.

[E]

Yeah. Never help look. Sometimes you go help look for, like, you go, I know this ball's in the water, but I'm going to go over here and help you look for the humor. Those guys are always. I like playing with those guys.

[C]

I'll look to a point, like, if you hit your ball in the weeds and then, you know, it is cut from, like, you know, six inches a foot to three. I'll go to the edge of the foot and look, I ain't going in there. Yeah.

[E]

Now I'm. I'm famously. I'm famously banned from inviting guests to play with Nate because he said my guests are not good.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

And do you still dress like Tiger when you play?

[E]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

We're not talking about Tiger. Only on Sunday at Augusta.

[C]

Yeah, I got. I got a call about that. Where were you? You were there, and you're going to go play someplace. And the director of golf called me.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Actually texted and goes, you know John Chris. I go, is he wearing Tiger red?

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Anyway, depends on if it was Sunday.

[B]

Goes out, shoot a hot 87.

[A]

You didn't do face paint or anything, did you?

[E]

No, I should have. Okay. Yeah, I should have.

[B]

John Brocado. I grew up in Huntsville, Alabama, but moved to Los Angeles with my band after college. Having. Growing. Having grown up in the South, I had never experienced an earthquake before getting to Southern California and living through two big ones, the Landers quake of 1992 and the North Ridge quake of 94. These were the two scariest moments of my life, even after experiencing countless tornadoes and hurricanes as a kid.

[D]

A couple weeks ago, we talked about weather. And Nate said earthquake was the scariest thing.

[C]

Yeah. I was there for the Northridge. It was crazy. 4:30 in the morning.

[B]

Yeah. I think it feels the most out of control. There's nowhere to go.

[C]

Nowhere to go, and you don't know it's coming. I mean, that thing threw me completely across the room.

[B]

Really?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, and I used to joke about it, you know, after everything, you know, people lived and everything was stable. But. Yeah, because the joke was because when I was single, I slept with no clothes on, so I was single at the time. And everything's shaking. I grabbed some sweats and I was running out and I looked at them and I was going, please be the bottoms.

[D]

You also said it helped you because you were bowling.

[C]

That was the first earthquake. First earthquake I ever had in Los Angeles. Wasn't bad because it helped me because I was actually. I was bowling.

[A]

It was at exactly 4:30am I.

[C]

4:30Am that's crazy.

[A]

You remember the exact time, Dude, You.

[C]

You get slammed, thrown out of bed, up against the wall.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

4:30Am and my.

[C]

My. My clock was destroyed and it was stuck on 4:30.

[A]

Yeah. 9, 000 people injured, property damage up to $50 billion.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

And I told jokes about it that night.

[B]

Yeah. Was that not the. Was it. Which one was on the. The World Series?

[C]

That was 89.

[B]

Yeah. Here's the other thing.

[C]

I was. My buddies were at the game at Candlestick, and I was supposed to make that game and my plane got delayed, so I just jumped on another one. I went, forget, I'll just go home. So I went to la.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And my buddies. This is back in the day of answering machines, and it was Carlos Ozraki and Rick Clay. Carlos still does comic. He wasn't Reno911, guy like that.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

And they left a message from payphone. They said, hey, you big loser, you're not making the game. Are you kidding? Why did you go home? Hey, whoa.

[B]

Hey.

[C]

And it was like three hours later. So I went, what was that? I flip it on. There's Mark McGuire in the middle of the infield with his kids. And I was going, holy crap. So I turned it on, saw what happened. Three hours. Took three hours before they could get back in touch with me. I didn't know what happened to him. Yeah. And I was like going, wow. Thank you, Lord. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

That's crazy.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

Yeah. If you still had that machine recording.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That'd be a good one.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Do you think the Earth earthquakes are upset that they don't get names like tornadoes.

[B]

No, we just.

[C]

No, we just didn't. North Bridge. Those aren't names because you don't. You can't predict them. You can't say, hey, the next.

[E]

No hurricanes. Hurricanes. Got the names?

[C]

Yes.

[E]

Yeah. Sorry I messed that up. Yeah. I think the hurricane is just a location earthquake.

[A]

It's just location of the date.

[C]

Earthquake Abigail.

[B]

Yeah. Earthquake Betsy. And you go, man, this will be a big stuff. That's insulting, but you're right.

[C]

So the earthquakes you've been through, right. They're. They're.

[B]

It's. I think it's crazy because there's nowhere you can when you're in it. It's not like you can go run five feet and it's not shaking. That's what the part. I know. Tornadoes and stuff. I think it's. Yes. If you were in them, it would be insane. But at least you. You feel like I see it and I can at least go away from it. I can move. Earthquake. There's nowhere to go. It was the most helpless feeling I've ever had in my life.

[C]

Oh, yeah. I'll never get my. One of the first or second ones. I've been in LA just a few weeks and we're in this restaurant and there was a tremor and I mean, it shook the table. You know, the glasses were everything. And I ran and stood in the doorway and no one else even flinched. I was the only one because everybody else was like, what are you doing? I go, dude, it's earthquake. They go, that's not nothing. And I'm over there like this.

[B]

What? I mean, it's wild.

[E]

You don't just run out to like. Like a field or something.

[C]

No.

[B]

In la, I don't know what you do.

[C]

No.

[E]

Where do you supposed to get. Man, what are you supposed to do?

[C]

Supposed to get in a doorway.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Really?

[B]

That's the strongest part of the house. Yeah. I guess if you're outside, you just. That's the thing. There's nothing really to do but hope it doesn't break on you and hope it stops. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, it's. It's so much moving. It's crazy. I was. We were in New York City when I talked about on this, but we lived in New York when New York happened. I mean, imagine all of Manhattan, every building that's the biggest building on Earth are all just going like this.

[C]

That's crazy.

[B]

That's the most out of, like, you're like, I hope this all works out. Like, I mean, it's unbelievable.

[C]

Yeah, you nailed it.

[B]

Helpless, help us.

[C]

Helpless feeling.

[D]

Yeah, we've all been there. You get blood work done, you wait a week, and the doctor says everything looks fine. Maybe they tell you to drink more water, get some exercise, but there's no breakdown of your hormones, no insight into inflammation, toxins, or nutrient deficiencies. Just vague advice and a quick send off platitudes. Yeah. Superpower is a completely different experience. It's a new kind of preventive care. More comprehensive, more personalized. And you can do it all from home. See, I love this because doctor's office, now they have the patient portal, which is great.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

But then they post your results and like, you know, you don't know what we're even talking about.

[A]

You don't know what you're looking at.

[D]

Yeah, that's why I love the this. Here's how it works. One blood draw, 60 labs, and a complete look into what is going on inside your body. They test over 100 biomarkers covering everything from heart, liver, thyroid function to hormones, metabolism, vitamins, minerals. So it scans for thousands of different diseases. You can also get a personalized action plan based on your results, all laid out in the app. Plus your own dedicated medical team to help guide you through what to do next. The price is very accessible. Superpowers used to cost $499. Now it's just $199 for the full experience. It's a fraction of what others charge. I just signed up and I can't wait to get started. So head to superpower.com to learn more, more. And lock in the special $199 price while it lasts. After you sign up, they'll ask you how you heard about them. And please make sure to mention this podcast to support the show. Your biology decoded, your blueprint activated with Superpower. All right, we can get back. Get in the. So, Henry, last week John was on. He just got home from fantasy cowboy camp.

[E]

Not how you say that.

[A]

I was on a ranch.

[E]

Cow Cowboy.

[A]

Ranch.

[C]

Contributing a fantasy cowboy.

[A]

Yeah, he was larping as a cowboy.

[C]

In the third round.

[E]

Any meat that.

[C]

Wait, wait, you went on to a cowboy?

[E]

I went to a ranch for a couple. And basically any meat that you guys are consuming, you know, this week or next, just. You're what we. I kind of.

[C]

That was you?

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I don't. Again, I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but.

[C]

So wait. Okay, so you did the fantasy rant?

[E]

No, I just did some.

[D]

You know, was it like city slickers.

[E]

That'S what everybody said in the comments. But yeah, no, we just had to do some cattle driving and stuff like that to make sure you get them down to the ride. Yeah, I was riding on a horse. You can go up to the and you can get the cows to do what you want to do. You got to bite them and stuff. I don't have to make the horse bite them, right?

[D]

Really?

[E]

Yeah, you got to bite them in that back.

[D]

The horse bites them.

[E]

The horse bites the ones that are going the slowest.

[C]

You bite the horse and the horse bites.

[E]

Yeah, it's wild.

[B]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[C]

So how many wrestlers were.

[E]

They say like nine. And I think there's two guides and I'm pretty sure the guides could have. They could have done it without. Without us. We were part of the. I don't know if I was being driven or if I was doing the driving.

[C]

And so you, you did this on purpose?

[E]

Yeah, yeah. It was like, you know, a thousand dollars or something.

[B]

You wanted to see what some real blue collar work was.

[E]

Yeah, I'm a comedian.

[B]

Got your hands dirty and so you went in.

[C]

Did you wear skinny jeans?

[E]

Nah, not for that. Yeah, you got to wear some wranglers for that.

[B]

Next week he's going to hotel that lets you clean. Very expensive.

[E]

It's an immersive experience.

[B]

You have to do it yourself.

[E]

What's this like?

[B]

Until you say, I don't want to do it anymore.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

And then you used to have cattle.

[C]

Yes. I still have probably a handful right now. Black Angus.

[E]

And that's the true sign of Rich.

[C]

The bull. Yeah.

[E]

Having your own cow.

[C]

The big well. No, shut up. The bull we had was the biggest animal I've ever seen. And my ranch hand was like curly and city slickers down in Alabama and Jackson named this bull Marshmallow. He was three years old. That's what you name that bull. Jackson goes Marshmallow. So this.

[E]

That's a good name.

[C]

So my ranch hand, I go, hey, how the cow's doing? He goes, 1137's doing pretty good. I go, that's not his name anymore. What's his name? This old guy had to go Marshmallow hated me.

[B]

Mad.

[C]

He hated me.

[E]

Well, that would be the. When do you think the era of like doing things for like fun. Like we paid to do them. Like camping people used. That's how people live.

[B]

They pay that. You do that now.

[E]

Yeah. When did.

[C]

When did these activities, they became activities.

[E]

Like, you know, like, like, you know that like the adventure races where you like crawl through the mud and, like, do the, like the warrior dash and you, like, crawl over and like, this sounds like. Like we don't have any challenges left like that. I'm cattle driving. I paid to cattle drive, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

I was like, this is.

[C]

That shows you have a lot of money.

[E]

No, I think. No, I just said the country, not me. I just said, yeah, oh, let's go work on, like, a ranch for the week. It'll be fun. The guy that actually works on the ranch, like, I hate this.

[B]

John pulls up behind people as flat tires.

[E]

Let me help you with that.

[B]

So he goes, let me do it. I just want to feel what it feels like.

[E]

I have fantasized about that. Honestly. I'm being honest.

[C]

All you gotta do is hang around Bates.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

He's had two flat tires around me.

[D]

I mean, right out of the gate. Right when I first met him, I don't think I'd been on the road with him yet. The first one.

[C]

The first. It was in Lenore, North Carolina.

[D]

Well, the first one, I think was at the Comedy Catch, wasn't it?

[C]

No, that was the second one.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah. That's when he joined aaa.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Right there on the spot.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

You can't tell me.

[C]

Go ahead.

[E]

You didn't. You never saw someone cutting grass and you're like, let me get on that thing, dude.

[C]

No, because I've done it.

[A]

No, I see that all the time. But also, I'm only looking at the fun part of it. Like, you're not thinking about the reality of the job and that it is hard work.

[B]

Oh, you're saying, watch them cut grass. I think I want to do it. Yeah.

[E]

Let me get on that thing. Just. It would be therapeutic.

[C]

So you've never done it?

[B]

Yeah, I've done lawn. I worked. I did cutting grass like in. When I was, like, right out of high school. Yeah, it's a brutal. Yeah, brutal now. Yeah. In your, you know, your mansion, you have. Yeah, it's probably a pretty good time. You sit on your little thing.

[E]

Sounds fun.

[B]

Yes, that is. Would be very. People do think it's very therapeutic cut their yards. Yeah, I do understand that.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

But I mean, the actual, like, being out in.

[A]

That's what I mean, the reality of it is.

[E]

You ever seen those tick tock videos of the pressure washer washing?

[A]

Yeah, I watch it all the time. I have a video game where I pressure wash. Pressure washing video.

[C]

You guys not own a pressure washer? Y' all really not own a pressure washer?

[B]

I play.

[A]

I play. It's A pressure washing simulator.

[E]

Don't really.

[A]

I play on Xbox.

[B]

That's insane. What do you mean? John, serious.

[D]

John's pulling away from it.

[A]

Hey, man. John, I got your back, dude. Jump in on this.

[C]

Oh, my words. Look at that.

[A]

It's a pressure washing simulator, man.

[E]

That's. No. Why not?

[B]

And then you just.

[A]

And you. You complete jobs and you get more money and then you can buy new nozzles and.

[C]

Oh, wow. That's like redneck Minecraft right there.

[E]

I want to pressure wash that house. Dude, that looks.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Don't you just.

[C]

I have a.

[B]

Why don't you go do it in real Life?

[C]

I have 61 steps and a deck. You guys can pressure wash at the lake.

[E]

I'd be happy.

[C]

I'll be doing that in about nine days.

[A]

See, this is what I mean, though. This is the fun part of pressure washing.

[E]

This looks awesome.

[A]

Lugging the thing to the house. House. And getting the water and getting the gas and all of that. That's the not fun part. But you just wanna. You just wanna clean some stuff.

[C]

Okay, I'll have it all ready. All you gotta do is pull the trigger.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

And go down the steps.

[A]

I was playing this game. I've only maybe played this game. Like an hour.

[C]

Well, 11 minutes long.

[E]

Look, Nate can't stop looking at it.

[B]

I don't know. I don't know if I. But this would be.

[A]

I was like halfway through a backyard and I was like coloring. I'm starting to feel like I do it a real job. Where I was like, man, this stinks, but I just gotta finish. And then I was like, I don't.

[B]

Have to do this.

[A]

I could just leave.

[B]

Look at that.

[E]

Dude. This guy's killing.

[B]

And then you went to your nap game.

[A]

I got Farming Simulator. And then there's a couple grass cutting.

[E]

Okay, when again, when. I don't know if this. The answer to this is on the Internet, but when do you think the first person camped? Like a recreation for the whole. All of human history, people were camping to live.

[C]

You mean, like, let's go for the weekend.

[B]

It's borderline impossible. Yeah. Even when they.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Like it's. It's.

[C]

Whoever had the first house.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Let's go stay outside.

[B]

Exactly. Whoever had the first house.

[C]

Yep. They probably. Hey, let's sleep outside.

[E]

I mean, the. The real losers really are. When cars were invented were the horses. They were like, did we used to run? And now people ride them for.

[A]

Not for work.

[E]

Yeah, they just ride Them for fun. They got to be like, dude, yeah.

[C]

But how do you know? I mean maybe the horse is like, I'm sick of working. This is great. I got guys coming, trying to be cowboys.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Maybe they got a lot of cow or cow. Every once in a while they got.

[E]

A guy like me coming on there. Like, did we hate this guy? Yeah, yeah, they hated me for sure. Yeah, it's.

[B]

It's in. I mean, I can't believe you have this game.

[C]

I can't believe you're still playing it.

[A]

Yeah, I'm not playing and I'm watching a guy.

[C]

I can't believe it's still.

[A]

I'm watching a guy who's good playing.

[B]

How many people have watches? 273.

[A]

273, 000 views.

[C]

So let me ask you this, Aaron, are. Do you get penalized if you go too deep and like cut into the wood?

[A]

Not. Not so far in the game.

[C]

Because in real life that is something that can happen.

[A]

100.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And I pressure wash in real life too. That's why I like it.

[B]

This is.

[A]

But like when you start out, I've.

[C]

Done a lot of things in real life that I don't play games. I don't. I don't find them on the Internet.

[E]

I will say, you guys are not going to believe this story and this does not break any confidentiality, but I was in rehab in 2019 and a guy was in there, I believe that addicted to video games.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah. He played mlb the show. I get it. He was in the mlb. I'm dead serious.

[B]

Oh really?

[E]

He was in the. He would. He. So he would every. Every.

[A]

He was an active player.

[E]

He was active player. I can't say what team and no.

[C]

No, you don't have to.

[E]

He's a player.

[C]

And then he got addicted to the video game.

[E]

Addicted to the video game.

[C]

And then he was in rehab for.

[E]

He would go to. So he. Every city go to four game road trip. He would go. He would go get to the city, swear off of it. Of course. He'd go to Walmart, buy a TV and an Xbox, play, stay up three nights in a row because he's on the road play. And then.

[C]

Oh, so he was a pitcher.

[E]

He was a relief pitcher.

[C]

Yeah, he had to be.

[E]

We're getting closer. To have this guy, you're like, what city? Yeah. And then. And then he would swear off of it, leave it.

[B]

What city did not travel to.

[E]

That's what I'm saying is like in real life you don't Want to do it. But like, it. He, he was.

[A]

Was he better at the game than he was in real life?

[E]

Yeah, but he was in the pros. He. That's the top.

[B]

How do you be addicted to, like, I mean, I understand being addicted to it.

[C]

How do you get addicted to a sport you play? Yeah, you're in the 1%.

[B]

And I mean, like, I could see like going, yeah, this is a problem.

[E]

But, but, but there's like the rehab.

[A]

Because you're, you start to do it at the expense of other things. Like, oh, people.

[E]

You don't think people can be addicted to that?

[C]

Yeah, people wouldn't be addicted to anything. Power washing.

[E]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now power. If you were like, hey, what game are you? And you're like mlb, the show. You're like, all right, well that. If you were in for this. Yeah. All right, guys.

[A]

Yeah, I, I used to play World of Warcraft when I was 16. I played every day with a guy from Canada who got hit by a bus and collected disability from the government. And he played world of Warcraft 24. He'd play all. He would literally just sit and play all day.

[B]

Yeah, that's.

[A]

That was his whole life.

[C]

But he was disabled. He was disabled. He wasn't playing in the major league.

[A]

You can turn off the game and read a book and oh, I see what you're feeling like, yeah, this is all he did was play this game. And we would get on at night and go, how's everybody's day? And people go, work was good. And he would go, yeah, you know, I've been playing. He would just talk about the game because that was his life.

[E]

Was.

[A]

Yeah, the whole game.

[E]

And you do, and you do. Like, if you, your reality is not great, but on there, oh, you're killing.

[A]

He turns off the game and he's a horrible. He's a. Yeah.

[E]

Horrible Canadian guy with one leg. No shot. The Canadian.

[B]

Yeah, but he's.

[E]

But you're a God in the game.

[B]

He's disabled.

[E]

That's what addiction is.

[B]

Like. I think it's like, yes, but you're picking like an athlete.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

That's a once in a generation athlete that makes it the pros.

[A]

Well, this guy was really good at the game.

[C]

Well, yeah, you don't need your leg.

[B]

Your guy was good at the game.

[A]

Yeah, he was the main 24 hours a day. Yeah, he was the main tank of the guild. He was pretty good.

[B]

Yeah. You're like, well, how good?

[E]

How good?

[C]

Be glad you don't know what that means.

[E]

I don't know what that.

[C]

I don't either.

[E]

Video games never, never got me. How do I get into it?

[C]

You don't. This too.

[A]

It's too. You got too much going on.

[E]

You have to get married.

[A]

Productive life.

[B]

I started playing DJ sometimes at on my bus, but I only do it on my bus.

[E]

But it doesn't get you going.

[B]

You know what it does? It? I. I can kind of, if I need to think about some stuff and I can kind of zone out.

[E]

Helps you that way.

[A]

That's what this is.

[B]

Focus.

[A]

That's what this is.

[B]

Go. Huh?

[A]

That's what this is.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm playing PGA and you're doing power washing. That looks like. I don't, I just don't like. It's crazy to me.

[A]

Well, some of those games like World of Warcraft, you had to. If you wanted to get anything done, you had to play four or five hours at once.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I wanted something or in reality get nothing done for four and a half hours.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I agree with you.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I agree with you. I had just moved to Tennessee. I didn't have any friends. This is what I was doing.

[E]

Now you gotta go.

[C]

But you had to invest time to play that game correctly. You had to put in four or five hours. That's what you're saying.

[A]

To get anything done. I would play 10 or 12 hours on a day, on the weekends sometimes for a while.

[D]

Were your parents ever concerned?

[A]

Probably, yeah.

[E]

It's a lot of videos.

[A]

But I just moved to a new city. I was going to football workouts in the morning I would come home and.

[C]

I would get on there and get.

[A]

On there and they'd play that.

[E]

Yeah, that's a. I think if you're gonna pick up something vice wise, this is the one. Yeah, I think so. If you had to pick.

[A]

I've seen them.

[B]

I do think about that sometimes. If I wish I could get addicted to something that's like working out.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Because people get obsessed with it.

[C]

Yes, they do.

[B]

You're like, I wish I could get obsessed with that. Yeah.

[C]

So you know what you need to do? You got to get addicted to something bad and then go to rehab and then replace it with whatever.

[B]

Oh yeah.

[C]

That's what every, every executive in Los Angeles.

[E]

Mine is.

[A]

I don't really know.

[B]

Oh really? That's what it is?

[C]

Yeah. They replaced that addiction with something else. I mean that's every manager, agent low rung, whatever, non successful, they've all been through rehab and they'll tell you that, you know, this is the greatest. And. Okay. How long you been doing it? Well, I got out of rehab.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Background's great.

[D]

We got the expert here.

[E]

Sounds familiar.

[C]

Oh, right here. That's why he's riding horses.

[E]

Yeah, that was. Yeah, yeah.

[D]

So we started talking about cowboy attire, and we only think we'd got to was chaps. And then John said he opened for dance review. Guys and chaps. And we kind of got off course here.

[B]

Well, it got off course now.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah. Back on the court.

[A]

What's the topic?

[B]

Cowboys.

[A]

We're back.

[B]

We're back.

[D]

We're just gonna finish up a little bit.

[A]

I played Red Dead Redemption, too. I'm a cowboy in that video game anyway.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

With prices going up on just about everything lately, dealing with money can be stressful. Trying to manage subscriptions, track spending, and cut costs can feel overwhelming. Luckily, Rocket Money can relieve some of that stress and help you feel confident in the financial decisions you make. Rocket Money is a personalized finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Rocket Money shows you all your expenses in one place, including subscriptions you forgot about. If you see a subscription you no longer want, Rocket Money will help you cancel it. This just happened to me. My daughter accidentally ordered something online, and when I went to cancel it, I noticed I had other stuff on there I totally forgotten about.

[E]

Right.

[D]

That's what's great about Rocket money. They have 5 million members that have saved people a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, with members saving up to $740 a year when they use all the app's premium features. So cancel your unwood subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com Nate today. That's RocketMoney.com Nate. RocketMoney.com Nate.

[B]

All right.

[D]

Cowboy hat. John, you got a cowboy hat?

[E]

I got a couple. Yeah, Stetson's. I got one from a rustler. Now, this one cost me like 900, so I don't think that's what the cowboys had in mind.

[A]

What is the function of a cowboy hat? Because now I just. Anyone I see wearing it now, they're choosing for style reasons. Most people like, what's the function of moving.

[C]

There you go, son. Cowboy hats. So I have several. And oh, yeah, I wear them different times when I'm doing different things, but it's always when I'm outside doing stuff. And it's about weather, sun. I mean, I have one. If it's raining. I wear a cowboy hat because it's on the back, you know?

[A]

Sure.

[C]

Yeah. The brims on the back.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

So it protects me.

[A]

But it's no different than, like, a bucket hat or something like that.

[D]

They could also.

[C]

But you know what? I've never had girls that look at me like they look at me in a cowboy hat.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

There's a difference. It is style.

[D]

The original cowboy hat was for sun protection. And you could dip water.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

Oh.

[D]

And drink from it. Or drink for the horses or let your horses.

[C]

Yep.

[E]

Whiskey for my man. Yep.

[D]

Did you. Did y' all try lassoing?

[E]

We. We had it on hand if we would have needed it, but.

[D]

But did you try it?

[E]

No, I never tried it. It's.

[D]

Yeah, it's hard.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

While riding. Yeah.

[B]

Have you tried it?

[D]

Yeah, just. I've never been able to do it, but I've been around. It's. To me, it's almost like a yo, yo, where you got to know the right hand motions to do it.

[B]

Or.

[D]

Or it just doesn't.

[C]

You have to have the correct rope, too. I mean, you didn't have just like, a rope, right?

[D]

No, it was a real lasso.

[C]

Okay. They have lasso ropes.

[B]

Right.

[C]

Which are very rigid.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

So that loop stays.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

We didn't that. The. The main wrangler, though. He did have a lasso, though, on. On his horse in case something went awry. I let him in the wrong direction or something like that. Yeah.

[D]

Do you have spurs?

[E]

No, we didn't have spur. We could kick them, though. We could kick the horses to get them to go. No spurs, but horses, you gotta, like.

[A]

What are spurs? What. What does spurs do?

[D]

Get the horse to go more.

[A]

But what. So it just hurts him a little more?

[D]

Yeah, just a little bit sharper.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It's hard. You gotta kick a horse. I was just. I mean, Harper loves horses. I rode with her a couple weeks ago.

[A]

So it's not just like a little tap. You gotta. Really.

[B]

I mean, you gotta. Even for me, I would see her have struggling, and you're like, all right, well, she's little and whatever. But when I wrote it, it's like. I mean, I even gotta kick it harder than you think. Okay.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

They're big power animals.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

Cowboy boots were designed the way they were the high tops to protect the leg from snakes or shrubs or whatever. And then the point was to get in the stirrup.

[C]

Yep.

[D]

Easier.

[C]

And then the hill is to stay on the back of the store.

[D]

That's right.

[B]

Yep.

[E]

All right.

[D]

Then rodeos became. Guys got so good at doing calf roping, all stuff like that, that they started having competitions to see who was the best at it. 1883, two guys got an argument and one was a roper, the other one was a cattle driver and they did a contest that was the first ever rodeo.

[C]

Where was it?

[D]

Frontier town of Pecos.

[C]

Doesn't say Texas.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Oh, fighting. Seeing who could stay on the bull the longest. That.

[D]

What? They didn't do bull riding, but. But they were doing other thing. But that was like the first demonstration.

[C]

Wow. That's crazy.

[D]

And now rodeo. You ever been to rodeo?

[C]

I have many rodeos, actually.

[B]

Ever done a show for one?

[C]

I did. Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

We were in the dirt.

[E]

I did one too.

[C]

Have you done one?

[B]

I don't think I have.

[C]

Yeah. You've done one. Yeah. Yeah. Were you with me?

[E]

I was in Raleigh is where I was.

[C]

Springfield, Missouri.

[E]

No, that was you.

[A]

I did Springfield, Missouri with you. It was like the rock and ribs festival or something. And it was in. It was on dirt.

[C]

It was on the dirt. That's right. So we were in a rodeo rink.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Yeah, that's where we were.

[E]

Yep, I remember that.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

There's a family that kind of dominate the rodeo circuit. Settle brock portion of it. The right family out of Utah and there's like, like seven boys and they all just win championships. For what?

[E]

Lassoing or roping or what?

[D]

Brock riding.

[E]

Oh. Oh, yeah. I got you riding the horses. Yeah, yeah.

[D]

And then the all time best rodeo cowboy is Trevor Brazil. He's won 23 world championships.

[E]

How old is he?

[D]

I think I know that guy.

[C]

I think Trevor's the one who got his face. He went down and people came up and got his food.

[E]

Man.

[D]

You know they wear helmets now.

[C]

They wear helmets. They wear face masks.

[E]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How do they agree? Where does the bull come from? It's like a neutral bull.

[C]

Yeah, it's kind. So the bull I was talking about, Marshmallow, was so big and I mean, he was crazy. He. He busted down a fence and went and did his bull thing with a bunch of cows. So I got a bunch of calves for free. All that kind of stuff.

[E]

I wouldn't allow. They was in charge.

[C]

They wanted him some rodeos, you know, local, smaller, LA stuff. They wanted him as a rodeo bull, but I wouldn't sell it to him for that.

[A]

So like, if I. If I'm a cowboy, I want to compete in a rodeo, I show up. They already have A bull there.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

It's not a bull that I have a relationship with in anyway.

[C]

No, no, no. It's a random draw and it's a rant.

[A]

Okay. A random draw and they're all using the same bull.

[C]

No, no, no, no, no. That's why you don't. There are different bulls that are. That are harder to rather than other.

[B]

So you're.

[A]

It's just the luck of the draw.

[B]

So the pro. Like, when comes it against the championship, they. You don't know what bull you're.

[D]

And you get judged, though, on the bull as well.

[A]

Do they take into account the difficulty level of the bull?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And what? It's just a. A group of people neutral, that just assess.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How crazy that one is.

[C]

Anything's judged. It's. You have judges.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

It's subjective on some level.

[B]

Maybe it's the, like. Yeah. That was not that hard. That bull didn't care that much.

[A]

That bull's was pretty cool with you.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

But that's how I got started. They used to have to break these horses, and then some guys were better at it than others by staying on. And then they started having competitions to see who could do it the best.

[B]

And. Yeah, that's another way that the bulls.

[D]

They were like, let's try with a bull now.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Do you know why they get so mad?

[B]

Why?

[E]

Why they buck like that?

[A]

Why?

[E]

You don't know?

[A]

No.

[E]

They cinch them. Their testicles.

[A]

They cinch them right before they go out.

[C]

Right before.

[E]

Yeah, that's why they're going nuts. What?

[A]

I didn't know that. I thought.

[E]

Is that. Am I wrong? They'd like snap.

[B]

They cut them off.

[E]

No, they like squeeze them.

[C]

They're grabbed.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Is that correct? Who's doing that information?

[A]

A competitor?

[C]

No, no, no.

[E]

I think there's a strap and they just pull it and then they want to just go nuts.

[A]

I thought they were just let loose and they were just going.

[D]

I did too.

[E]

As soon as they fall off, they pull the thing and then it loosens them up and then they relax.

[B]

Facts.

[E]

Wow. You didn't know that.

[A]

No, I had no idea.

[E]

Proud to have some information.

[B]

Yeah, I like that.

[E]

Although you did know that information. I wasn't going to be the first guy to say it.

[C]

You're fine. That word on the air.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

When they. I think when they put them in the thing, they're not. They're calm. They're not calm.

[C]

They're not calm. They know what's coming and then they that's the thing.

[E]

They know what's coming and then they go.

[C]

I mean, imagine if you knew what was coming. You'd be in that.

[A]

Yeah, I'd be pretty upset.

[C]

You'd be in that stall going, really? You better not.

[B]

Wow.

[E]

That's why that. Yeah, that's why they. People. People like some.

[B]

You kind of get going off of you just trying to.

[E]

We go to, like, SeaWorld, and you're like, I don't. If. If you're. If these animals aren't being treated well, we don't need this entertainment. I think that's what a lot of rodeos ago. Hey, we shouldn't. We shouldn't be doing this to these animals. I think it's what a lot of people recently have said.

[A]

I think a lot of people. Now it's matadors. That's the. The bull fighting people. People don't like anymore. But on the rodeo, they're not hurting the bulls.

[C]

No, they're fine. They're bulls.

[E]

Yeah, they don't.

[D]

I mean, Peter doesn't like it.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I can't remember the. Oh, gosh. This was some San Francisco comic in the early 90s. Used to matador. He goes, yeah. The bull comes up, Matador puts a sword in him. Yeah, I'm smarter than a bull.

[E]

Outwitted.

[A]

Outwitted a dumbbell.

[B]

Yeah. So the matador, they. They. They kill that bull.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

I think they're stabbing it with a sword.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

And the running of the bulls is. It's just like a. Like a. And they just open the gates, and everybody just.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Now those bulls are just running. They're not.

[E]

They're.

[B]

But the privates aren't tied or anything. People are getting.

[E]

They're just running through the streets, and it's blocked off.

[B]

Go do that.

[E]

My buddy Cortland did it this year, and he was like. He said it was the wildest thing. He's there. He's like, there's no. Yeah, they run through that. The bulls run through that.

[B]

That.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

What did he do when he went through it? He.

[E]

I mean, there's like, they.

[C]

Now that's where I'd be.

[E]

They don't let everybody wears the same outfit, and they don't let. And everybody do it. Now. It used to. Because people. Too many people just.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

It's not usually that packed when they start.

[C]

No, but people got. Get hurt.

[E]

That's 20, 23. Oh, yeah. But it's like a rush. If you're gonna get addicted to something, dude, what are you addicted?

[B]

So they're about to open that and let the bulls run to that crowd.

[E]

Find a better video it. Yeah, There you go. They're. They're.

[A]

How long's the run?

[E]

That's absurd.

[B]

Gosh, that one looked like it waited for people.

[C]

Yeah. He.

[B]

Figure it out.

[C]

I don't have to go anywhere.

[E]

Yeah. They shoot, and then they open it, and they all run down the street. Is that all the guys right there? That's insane to me, dude. Look at that. No shot.

[B]

I would. Yeah. I mean, I would be, like, I could see maybe running up for a second, Then I would get against the wall. Like, I would do it enough to be like, I did it. Yeah. And then. But, I mean, guys, are.

[A]

Do you know how far the run is? Is it like a. It's not like, a half marathon or something, Right?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's a 5K.

[E]

But I think once the. Once the bulls are past you, the rush is over, so you want to stay out in front of them. Yeah, but if you go to the side, you're, in essence, giving up.

[B]

Yeah. But then you go to the same thing right there. You're touching it, and then.

[E]

That's crazy, dude. Yeah, it was crazy. Yeah. I want to go do it next year. Nate, you want to get.

[A]

You would do it.

[C]

Y' all do that and film it.

[B]

Oh, and they run it.

[E]

They run it into the. Yeah. Oh.

[A]

It's an average of two to three minutes. I could do that.

[E]

And then they're all.

[A]

I was worried more about just the run. Just having to run.

[C]

That's the actual average. Some people run, like, five seconds.

[E]

Depends on who you are.

[C]

There is an over. Under.

[B]

It would be. Yeah. Where do you got to go? Like, I mean, man, it would be just.

[C]

I wouldn't do that.

[B]

Spain.

[D]

I'd be afraid they'd all get past me, and then I turn around to Aaron would just pull over me.

[B]

I would think you could get up. Like, I think, you know, I would like to thank him athletically enough not to.

[E]

To get right.

[B]

I can, like, figure it out.

[D]

Yeah. Rodeo clowns, they have to, I mean, risk their life sometimes.

[C]

Yep.

[E]

Situation.

[B]

That's. That is.

[E]

Oh, Jim did it.

[B]

Yeah. Now, he did a joke on it.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Yeah. It's a little different. It's a little different.

[E]

Yeah. But this is the same as. This is the same as video games or gambling or any type of. If you're, like. You get addicted to, like, adrenaline, you're like, this is unbelievable.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, that's all I want right there. That are in the thick of it just running straight in front of them.

[E]

Is, dude, imagine how now this guy is living. That guy in the red shirt is the best day of his life. This is the best day of his life. I promise.

[C]

And the shortest.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Potential.

[E]

There's no higher high than.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

When people are running with the bulls. I mean, it's.

[C]

Oh, there's more.

[E]

Imagine if. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Imagine if. If you're. You're a wife with three kids and your husband goes, I think I'm gonna go, oh, yeah. I think I'm gonna go with bulls. This. Look at that, dude. I think I'm going with the bulls this year. You do what?

[C]

Well, yeah, well, you're gonna have a wife with no kids. Who's gonna go, yeah, yeah.

[E]

With anybody.

[A]

I think the same thing of that is a guy that's like, I'm gonna go hike up Mount Everest or something. You know, the same thing.

[E]

You could also not do this.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

We're not supposed to be up there.

[B]

Oh, well, they. Yeah, they want to do Everest or.

[A]

Even, like, the more dangerous ones. Everest is really not.

[B]

Well, I feel like if that person is like. Yeah. That person's a person that does that kind of stuff.

[A]

Yeah. Thrill chasing.

[B]

Yeah. And so skydiving.

[D]

But at least Everest is there. We create this.

[A]

That's true.

[D]

This whole scenario.

[B]

Well, you got to get them over there. Yeah.

[D]

You got to get.

[B]

Do it with the empty street, but.

[A]

Yeah, it's tough to clear out a street.

[B]

Tough to clear out a street.

[E]

But the. The. Why, like, if you go on a roller coaster, what's the thrill of it? You're like, we might die, but you're not gonna die. It's like. Yeah. You're so close to, like, potential harm. Yeah. That's why it's fun.

[A]

I was telling Nate. So my Lucy, my wife, her grandfather was in a club called, like, the Roller Coaster Enthusiasts of America.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Where they would just go. If a new roller coaster opened up, they would just go and just work, test it.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

They just love. They just loved it. See, that is love. Do a thrill of it. It doesn't do anything. There's nothing for me.

[E]

I don't.

[A]

I don't. Terrified.

[E]

I don't like it.

[A]

No desire to do that.

[B]

Yeah, it's. It's. Yeah. I think it's like. Like, man, we rolled one in Universal or an Epic. It was crazy.

[E]

Epcot.

[A]

What you say you rolled one rod?

[B]

I don't know. Rode one. We rode one, and it was in Epic, the new Universal and It was. I mean, it's intense. It was like. Yeah. Do we. I think we talked about it on here, right? Like, it was. I mean, it was. Yeah. That stuff's intense.

[E]

Yeah. Well, that. That's, like, kind of. It's not a secret, I guess, but you watch nascar. Like, what's so exciting about this? That guy could die.

[B]

He's going 200 thinking that. I don't think anybody is watching it for. I mean, that. That is. That can happen.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

But you seem to be the only one that is rooting for death.

[E]

I'm not.

[C]

He's not rooting.

[E]

Like, look at the chances it could be.

[B]

Be. I don't think if any of the NASCAR drivers would like to talk to John before the race when he goes, man, it's crazy. I know one of you could die.

[E]

Isn't that. Isn't that Running of the Bull?

[B]

Did you have that logo on that car?

[E]

What?

[B]

On your nascar.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

The hair logo.

[E]

That was last episode.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, yeah, I did have that on the. Yeah.

[D]

A dude ranch is a ranch for tourism and visitors that want to pretend to be cowboys.

[E]

That's not where I was.

[D]

Reddal in. Used to have a dude ranch.

[A]

Oh, yeah?

[C]

Did you really? Yeah, out in Waverly. Wow.

[D]

Drugstore cowboys are guys who wear the clothes but don't actually do anything but sit on the stool of a drugstore sort of fountain place.

[B]

Oh, really?

[D]

Yeah, it's called drugstore Cowboys.

[E]

Never heard of it.

[D]

They also say all hat and no cattle.

[E]

Same thing.

[D]

Just grab somebody that dresses the dress but doesn't do anything.

[A]

And probably a bunch of words you can't say on the podcast.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

We quoted a couple of your jokes last week.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Stolen.

[D]

That's how that works about playing cowboys and Indians.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Wow. That's 1986. My first joke.

[E]

Oh, yeah, though. That you were the cook.

[C]

That's right.

[D]

You played army.

[C]

Yep. Neighborhood against me. You know, it's crazy thing. My buddies got interviewed early in my career, and they go, yeah, that cook. Y' all make Hen Henry be the cook. They go, no, man. Yeah, that's a joke.

[A]

Yeah, Right.

[E]

Never happened.

[C]

We played Bonanza. He was Little Joe.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And they go, really? Yeah, I was Little Joe. I don't. Hop sing. Get out of here. Hop sings. My dad.

[D]

Some famous cowboys. Billy the Kid, Jesse James.

[B]

Are they cowboys? Where were they? Not really. Yeah, I was gonna say. Yeah.

[D]

Wyatt Earp. None of these, really.

[B]

Yeah. Who's a famous cowboy then?

[E]

John Wayne?

[D]

Billy the Kid, Troy Aikman.

[E]

Okay.

[C]

There you go.

[A]

Michael Irvin.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. Oh did. But they had the. You go out in the middle of the street and you try to shoot each other, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

A duel.

[B]

Is that they would be cowboy. Like. I don't know. That'd be a cowboy. Not really.

[D]

Just in the traditional sense.

[B]

They're outlaws.

[C]

Yeah, they're outlaws that rode the transportation. That was.

[B]

I think.

[A]

I think the line's been blurred between that. I think we're all talking about the same thing though.

[B]

I think if John. John Wayne.

[E]

John Wayne.

[B]

Could he be a legit. He was probably legit doing it. It.

[C]

I think John Wayne. Yeah. He probably did all that riding.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I mean he wasn't four packs a day.

[A]

Yeah, he did four. How many Westerns did he do? 100.

[C]

Oh gosh.

[A]

100 or something. Yeah, he was in all of them.

[B]

Why are Wes. You know, it's funny, I never got into.

[E]

Me neither.

[B]

Really.

[E]

Neither.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you watch Django Unchanged. Like Django Unchanged. You ever see that?

[E]

No, that's probably not the first one.

[C]

Would.

[A]

No, I'm just thinking of.

[B]

It's the world. I don't know if it's the world I never got into. Like I don't. It doesn't. Like I have a fantasy like game. Like Game of Thrones and that kind of stuff. That world doesn't. I know. Does it interest me where I can stay? But westerns are the one that like. It's. The people made it the most and people love them. And I for some reason am just like.

[C]

But. And it's not a made up world. I mean it was how.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

How this country was.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Beginning.

[B]

Me.

[A]

What about Lord of the Rings?

[E]

You do that or.

[B]

No.

[C]

No, I don't.

[D]

Nothing.

[A]

You can't immerse yourself.

[E]

Harry Potter.

[B]

I can't immerse myself. It's.

[C]

You don't.

[E]

You can't go in.

[A]

You ever get lost in a good.

[E]

Book or something like that?

[B]

A good book?

[D]

You ever met him?

[B]

Yeah, I can get lost in my own.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

In my own.

[B]

In my own.

[A]

My own world.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, I'm thinking. Yeah. I get lo. I can get lost in my act or something.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Like that.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

But I don't know if I can get lost in. Yeah.

[A]

That's world building. Movies hard world building in your own way.

[E]

I don't watch movies.

[C]

Silverado. That's a good western to watch.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

Buffalo Bill Cody started a traveling show that kind of. A lot of the stereotypes we have with cowboys kind of started with his Wild west show and he would bring along Annie Oakley. He could shoot sharpshooter.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Andy. Annie.

[C]

Annie.

[B]

That was her.

[C]

Yeah, his sister. Andy.

[E]

Related? They're related.

[B]

Did you know who Annie Oakley was?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Get your gun.

[B]

That's what it's from?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I didn't know.

[C]

You don't know anything about westerns.

[B]

I don't.

[C]

It's fine.

[D]

This is history. This is a Westerns. This is history.

[C]

I'm trying to help.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

I watch. Every history movie I watch is on the edge of my seat.

[C]

That's right. That's why I'm.

[A]

What happened. Gunfight at the O.K. corral. Is that from.

[D]

Okay, okay.

[E]

But what era of. Of the United States was this?

[A]

Turn of the century.

[C]

Before. Before.

[A]

Around the 1900s. Right around there.

[E]

So the 19.

[D]

Mostly 1800s. Late 1800s.

[E]

In the 1960s and 70s was when they were popular, the Westerns.

[A]

A lot of them.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

They don't make them anymore.

[B]

But what if it's an age thing? Because if you're. You Western, you like, you would have heard older stories about your people being. Growing up on horses and riding horses is. Versus when do you start getting less and less and less.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, because you're.

[C]

I don't know, what do you think? The Butch Cassidy and stun dads. Kid. Paul Newman, Robert Redford. Watch that one.

[E]

But they make these new worlds now, like Avatar.

[A]

But I think there was an era where the archetype of like an alpha American man was a cowboy.

[C]

Right.

[A]

That's what it was.

[D]

John Wayne.

[A]

And I don't exactly. And I don't know if that's what. I don't think it's that anymore. I don't know what it is. Astronauts. Another one that was like the archetype of that.

[B]

That.

[E]

And then that's.

[A]

But I don't know what it is for, like, guys closer to our age, like, what. What is the.

[B]

An athlete.

[A]

It must be. It must be like.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. Top Gun. I mean, you know, fighter pilots.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

There's some military stuff.

[D]

Pressure washer.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

It's gonna be the next movie. The Pressure Wash kid comes up in the minor leagues.

[D]

So Wild Bill. Wild Bill Hickok was a outlaw and he got invited to be part of this Wild west traveling show, but he didn't enjoy acting. He would often hide behind the scenery, and in one show, they put the spotlight on him and he pulled out his gun and shot out the spotlight. So they asked him to stop coming.

[C]

They only had one line. Yeah, yeah.

[D]

So they had to stop, right?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, I would almost be like, yeah, just.

[C]

That's pretty good.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Did the people know who he was? Yeah. So he was famous?

[D]

I think so.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I would be like, that's not a good promoter.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Do whatever you want. Shoot more stuff, dude, you know what?

[E]

Do the, like, that's the only one we're talking about.

[D]

I don't know how back then how famous anybody was because I mean, news just didn't travel like it does now.

[B]

I bet they were famous in whatever area, but could mail.

[C]

They had the dime knob.

[A]

Could mail travel at all?

[B]

Yeah. What is that?

[C]

It's a book that. That would cost a dime. And they wrote stories about Billy the Kid and Doc Holliday and Wyatt Earp and all those. They're called dime novels.

[A]

You got any Pony Express stuff on there?

[D]

I don't, but we talked about that. I guess we did on a previous episode.

[C]

You know the stop was up there in Gallatin.

[D]

I did not know that.

[C]

Yeah, there's a Pony Express stop up in Gallatin. Sure is. Right off. What does that be? The Veterans? Yeah. You get into Gallatin, it's up there.

[A]

Johnny Cash.

[B]

Really? Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Did you do it?

[C]

No, I didn't. I fed the horses. I fed the horses and I cook for the. The riders.

[D]

Those I do remember, they were mainly like 13 year old boys and they had to weigh like no more than £100.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then they went, wow, we're going to make them jockeys.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

And that's how it all started.

[E]

Is it?

[C]

Yep.

[D]

But the Buffalo Bills are named after Buffalo Bill Cody.

[E]

Wow.

[B]

Wait, so he was.

[A]

I didn't know that bad.

[B]

He was an outlaw. You said a cowboy.

[D]

Well, Wild Bill. Wild Bill Hickok was the. Buffalo Bill Cody's the one that was the. Did the show, the Wild west show. And the Buffalo Bills were named after him.

[C]

And he'd wear buffalo skin around.

[B]

Yeah. Do you know what the Ravens are called? The Ravens?

[A]

Edgar Allan Poe.

[B]

Of course. You knew.

[E]

Is that true?

[A]

Yeah, that was a guess. But yeah, I knew that because he's from Baltimore.

[B]

Baltimore. Yeah. Yep.

[A]

Never more. Never more.

[B]

That's awesome. Yeah, that's why I didn't know that until this weekend. I had a joke about it. They go, I go, why is the Ravens called the Ravens? And they told me, ed Ground Pole Poe. And I go, that's not the joke. And he goes, he goes, edgar. Because of Edgar Allen Poe. I was like, oh, yeah, he's safety, right?

[C]

No, very funny.

[A]

Oh, you thought Ed perfect.

[B]

Think anything I didn't think anything.

[A]

I know, I know.

[C]

That was very fun.

[B]

Yeah, that's good. Nice little opening in to Baltimore.

[A]

That's amazing.

[E]

And here we are. Yeah.

[B]

Very good.

[D]

In between here is about done with Cowboys. But I wouldn't just. Just skip it.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

All right, let me see if there anything else about Cowboys. The Dallas Cowboys are the most valuable franchise in sports. Have been for 20 something years. Cowboys.

[A]

You think they would be even if like college. If you could buy and sell college programs the same way?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah. No one's gonna buy a college. Yeah. No college program is. Not even. Cowboys are close a brain.

[C]

We're talking about billions.

[E]

Notre Dame. Yeah.

[A]

But I'm saying you think University of Tennessee is worth more than the Titans?

[C]

No, no, no, not even close.

[B]

The NFL's so big. Yeah.

[C]

They're all billions.

[B]

You got think the University of Tennessee is.

[A]

Yeah. So are some of the. Some like the high level college programs. Like the, the, the market value of the athletic program has to be the.

[B]

NFL just like international and everything. Where you go University of Tennessee, you. There's an area you get outside of and they're not going to know it.

[E]

If you get the biggest.

[B]

I mean you said Notre Dame, I.

[A]

Guess because it's Ohio State versus the worst NFL team.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Carolina, even like the Dolphins or something. I bet Ohio State's worth more. If you were to put the athletic program.

[B]

I would say most people don't know about college because most people don't watch college sports. So like up east, like in the Northeast, like they don't watch college sports as much and they, they watch Notre Dame probably. But it's, it's. They know about them but they're not. It's not the NFL. It's not even close.

[C]

No. NFL's were. Yeah. Seven billion.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Dolphins value around seven billion. That's a bad example because they're the eighth most valuable NFL team team. I was trying to pick an out of like a small market.

[B]

But what's. I know that's crazy.

[C]

Well, here's what you have to understand.

[E]

Elephants taking shots.

[C]

A college team may have one all American. An NFL team has 22 plans.

[A]

Right. But I'm talking about all the assets. Every like everything. The TV deals, everything. No, University of Texas, like what's the value of the University of Texas?

[B]

Can you not look it up and.

[A]

See why we can't buy and sell these things? So they're not like on the market.

[C]

And these aren't endowments.

[A]

Speculative.

[C]

We're not talking about Endowments. So.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Like the. Versus athletic, not the facilities.

[C]

1.2.

[A]

Yeah, that's the. That's the value of the athletic facility.

[C]

And that's one highest.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Of like, Texas is worth an estimated 2.38 billion per the athletic, so.

[C]

Not even close.

[A]

Jeez. Well, the. Versus the Dolphins. But what's.

[E]

You know, you're in the. You're in the ball.

[D]

It's closer.

[C]

But what is the lowest value?

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I would say the Bengals have a valuation of 5.5 billion, so it's like, not even close.

[B]

All right, all right.

[E]

I see where you're going.

[C]

Trust me, I know. I know 2.5 billion sounds like a lot, but it's not. When there's 5.5 billion.

[B]

Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I don't know if I believe these numbers.

[B]

Yeah, well, you think it'd be.

[C]

You know what? You should do research tonight.

[B]

I would think college is, you know, college is like a privileged thing, I think.

[A]

Wait, what do you mean?

[B]

I don't mean to be privileged, but it's like in the world, I think most people. Majority can't be going to college.

[C]

No, majority. Don't.

[B]

Don't.

[A]

Has nothing to do with this, but it has the.

[B]

The value of it.

[A]

The majority of people can't play for the Bengals.

[B]

They can know who the Bengals are.

[A]

And they can know who the University of. The only people in Texas know the University of Texas all over the country.

[B]

But what. What value would they like? But you're only going to get those people in that thing like the NFL is. You're just rooting for this team. It's not. You're invested into the school or whatever it is.

[A]

I guess not everybody.

[B]

I'm saying the value.

[A]

It's just.

[B]

You got to have fans to be the biggest value.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, you're gonna have more fans from a professional league that actually can go out and try to do that. Where college is like, you know, you get. You get outside of. I mean, we're talking about outside the country. If you get outside the country, then you're like. Yeah, I don't think if you go to Europe, they're like the Texas Longhorns, but they know. They go. They might know. They know Jacksonville Jaguars because they've played over there a few times, you know.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, those games, the NFL games are sold out in Europe. And I don't think if you took away the United States fans that are traveling to see the college teams, it'd be a hard sell over there to watch A bunch of.

[D]

Because Notre Dame plays over there. Right.

[A]

They just play the game in Ireland. Start the season.

[D]

Georgia Tech.

[E]

Go Jackets.

[C]

That's right.

[E]

We played there last year.

[C]

Yeah, but if you took away the. The. The. Their loyal fans who are going. NFL fans. I mean, that's the thing. You go to Europe and they show the games in Europe, the NFL. You'll see every team represented Jersey wise. Because they don't. They're just going to that CNF NFL game. They're not going to root for a team.

[E]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

So that's. I mean, that's the whole. That's the. How huge and global the NFL is over the University of whatever.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Makes sense.

[C]

Well, Nate's right, because once I. Trust me, you get out of the sec. No one cares that much. They just not.

[B]

I mean, they have big following, but they. I mean, all State, obviously.

[C]

They have Ohio State, Notre Dame, but for the most part.

[B]

Most part.

[C]

You.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. They. They're not gonna. They don't stop.

[B]

Their.

[C]

Their town does not shut down on Saturday.

[B]

I mean. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think, you know, or. Or that just that town does nothing outside of it.

[C]

Right.

[B]

Like, it's. Notre Dame moves the needle more in Ohio State, like, but it's. It's very far. Few between.

[A]

All right.

[B]

It's a dumb thing to bring up. So.

[D]

Thanks for running the podcast, Aaron.

[B]

Yeah. A lot of people talking about the Cowboys. That's pretty much. We're good, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

All right. I don't know where I'm hosting the Emmys. That's after this.

[E]

Let's go. Wow.

[A]

This weekend.

[B]

This weekend.

[C]

That's. That's big dud.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Way to go.

[B]

Thank you.

[E]

Watch party.

[A]

I don't think it's this week. No, I think it's next weekend.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, next weekend. But I won't be here for that podcast.

[A]

So the next time we'll see you. You will have hosted the Emmys.

[B]

I will have hosted the Emmys.

[E]

How do you.

[A]

How do you feel about it? Like, right now? We're a couple weeks ahead. Do you feel, like, good about it?

[B]

Yeah, I'm excited.

[A]

We have more excitement than nerves and kind of just.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. You know, you don't want to blow it. I think I have a lot.

[A]

I think doing, like, the Christmas show and all that is. You feel better because you've done, like, a lot.

[B]

I feel much better knowing that I've done that kind of thing. I want to do me and I think we have the right team around helping me and we got a. You know, I think a great idea is an opening. And another thing, we have a couple ideas that are pretty different that I think people will talk about, but I think it'll be what I do. And, yeah, I'm. I'm excited. I mean, I'm excited to do it, and then I'll be happy to be done with it.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Because it's. You just want it to be.

[A]

Do you think you'll run any of this stuff at your shows at all, or are you gonna keep them separate.

[B]

In your mind right now? My mind I think I keep separate. Like, I don't know if. I don't know if I'm gonna have stuff like that.

[D]

Because you're in Denver the night before, right?

[A]

The two days before.

[B]

Two days before, yes. Lincoln, Nebraska. Wichita, Kansas. We had to. Can. We had to not cancel. We rescheduled, so. And I, you know, want to apologize to them for that. But Denver was, like. It was, like, too insane to get it moved. It would be too crazy. And then. So it was like, yeah, I'll be doing rehearsals on Friday, flying to Denver. One show, two shows Saturday, and then fly back and then do Emmys the next day. Sunday, Sunday, do the Emmys.

[A]

That's got to be up there with one of your craziest weekends.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

We've had some crazy ones.

[B]

I've had some.

[A]

I remember hearing some of them were like, geez, dude. But this is up there.

[B]

We had. Yeah, the one was in Vegas. I did a show of Vegas at. That ended at 12:30am and I had a 3pm Boston Garden Show.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Wow. That was a while.

[A]

That's one of the ones I was thinking of.

[B]

That was a wild one. Yeah. But that was one that you're like, birthday weekend. That was my birthday. Yeah, that was a. That's the one that was recent. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And that was like, one that you're like, no, not this Boston Garden. It was last time. Last time I was there. Okay. But it was. It was like, one that you're like, all right. Like, I love it. Let's. Let's go do it. So this is going. This is kind of that.

[A]

Embrace the. The chaos.

[B]

I love the chaos, and I love it, and I, you know, I. You know where. And the only reason I'm even able to host Emmys is because of the road. So I don't love having to reschedule some stuff, but it's. I think this will be fun and whatever. And, yeah, it'll be fun just to go at least closer Denver's closer. You can do it and then come right back and then host that night and then just be.

[C]

Well. Yeah, you're smart to just do you. Yeah, you got to do.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, you should do that Ravens joke.

[B]

I might. You know, that is good. Yeah, bring that up. Aaron. In the crowd. Air. Ground. Pole.

[A]

Man married his cousin. He died. Died in alcohol.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

He died in the. On a curb. Just on the street.

[C]

On the curb.

[A]

It was a tragic death.

[C]

Same curb as him, anyway.

[A]

Did he die the same Hemingway killed himself?

[E]

Yeah, on a curb, maybe.

[A]

I don't know if Hemingway did or not. Yeah, we'll look into it. Maybe we'll do literature when you're gone.

[B]

Yeah, I would like to be here for literature. Yeah. All right.

[A]

We'll do literature when you're here, if you want to.

[B]

Yeah, okay.

[E]

Literature.

[B]

That's where I have fun. Why would you do the things that I don't do? Are the things the. I don't know if y' all know.

[A]

How come we'll do golf when you're gone, then.

[B]

Yes, that would be exactly. That's how comedy works. You pick someone that doesn't know golf.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

Pick something that doesn't know literature.

[A]

Okay, so we have a lot. That opens up the door for a lot of stuff.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. It's. It's insane that y' all are just learning how comedy works now, so.

[D]

And then we'll do it in two minutes in, he'll be like. And who cares?

[B]

That's cuz. You.

[C]

You.

[D]

Well, yeah, I'll be here.

[B]

All right. I'll be there. We're here.

[D]

September 5th, Cincinnati Comedy Club. Commonwealth Comedy Club. Excuse me. September 6th and 7th, I'm in Indianapolis. September 14th, in Brookhaven, Mississippi. September 21st, Perigul, Arkansas.

[C]

Wow. Oh, is that what we're doing?

[B]

Anything you want to plug.

[C]

September 4th, 14th, Shreveport. September 20th. Something, somewhere.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, Majestic Theater in Dallas.

[E]

Nice.

[B]

That's a great theater.

[C]

September 20th, Pabst Theater, Milwaukee.

[A]

Awesome.

[B]

Great.

[C]

And then October 11th, the. The Vic in Chicago. The reason I'm mentioning those is because we need to sell some more.

[B]

Yeah, the Vic in Chicago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a great venue. You.

[C]

I'm excited.

[B]

October 11th it is.

[C]

Don't worry.

[D]

I'm in. Yeah, I'm in Chicago this weekend. I'll pitch it for you.

[C]

Yeah, pitch it for me.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go out to the Vic. The Vixa.

[E]

I was there.

[B]

Famous. Famous venue. Yeah, yeah, it's a. It's a really cool spot.

[C]

Yeah, that's good. Run there.

[A]

Yeah, sure is, man.

[E]

Yeah, I'm on 20, 25 cities all fall. I think I'm doing two. I'm doing two comedy clubs in September and Knox, or let's see, Lexington and going down to Huntsville. And then I'm out in off all.

[B]

Yeah, I get all figured out.

[C]

Is this props?

[E]

Yeah. Hey, no, hey, don't ruin the prop.

[C]

Like I'm ruining the prop tour. I think it started no fires.

[E]

No fires in the greenery.

[C]

That's right.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

So Aaron Weber here, Phoenix, Arizona, Desert Ridge improv and then comedy works in Denver, downtown. That's a big one.

[C]

Nice. Yeah, that's great.

[A]

I'm hoping we'll get to.

[B]

Oh, yeah, hoping we're gonna get to.

[A]

Add a show there, but that's a good. So Phoenix, Phoenix and Denver. So come on out.

[B]

All right. All right. Thank you, boys, for being on.

[C]

Thanks for having us fun.

[A]

Yeah, thank you, guys. It was a good time.

[B]

All right, we love you. See you all later. Bye.

[E]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

[A]

Feel good and look good this summer.

[E]

With savings on your personal care favorites and earn four times points now through September 9th.

[B]

Shop in store or online for items like Dollar Shave Club razors, hydro silk razors and edge shave gel.

[E]

Plus some favorite brands like Tampax, Pearl, Depend and Poise to earn four times points to use for later discounts on groceries or gas. Hurry in before these deals are gone.

[B]

Offer end September 9th. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[C]

Chances are you've been to the doctor.

[A]

Recently and you probably handed over your.

[C]

Insurance, your ID and even your Social Security number.

[A]

Your doctor is just one of many.

[C]

Places that has your personal info, and.

[A]

If any of them accidentally expose your.

[C]

Details, you could be at risk for identity theft. Lifelock monitors millions of data points a second. If you become a victim, they'll fix it, guaranteed or your money back. Save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code iheart or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off. Terms apply.

[B]

Mmm.

[A]

Ooh, whatcha eating?

[B]

The new banana split cookie from AM pm. All freshly baked with rich real butter with banana, chocolate and strawberry flavors.

[E]

Wow, that sounds amazing. Can I have a bite?

[B]

I'm sorry, but no. But you can't split the banana split. Not even a little?

[E]

Not even a crumb. What if.

[B]

No, please. Mine when it's too legit to split. That's cravenience. Get a 3 pack for 99 cents with our app ampm. Too much good stuff plus tax where applicable. Prices and participation may vary. Terms and conditions apply.