282: #282 Boats featuring Connor Larsen

Summary

The Nateland Podcast – Episode 282: Boats (Dec 10, 2025)

Hosted by Dusty Slay (guest host), Aaron Weber, Connor Larson (guest), and Nick Kate Bargetze

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Episode Overview

This week’s Nateland Podcast sails into the topic of Boats, and as is tradition, wanders across tales of parenting mishaps, stand-up road stories, and music debates, all delivered with the show’s signature blend of self-deprecation and observational humor. Connor Larson joins as special guest, bringing boat expertise and comic camaraderie. The group reflects on boating experiences—both tragic and hilarious—with plenty of diversions into comedy life, personal milestones, and why pontoon boats might be the ideal vessel for land-loving comics.

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Notable Segments & Timestamps

1. Welcoming Guest Connor Larson & Recent Parenting Scare

• [00:46-05:15]
  Connor recounts his daughter’s fall out of a high chair and their first ER trip as parents. The other comics share similar parenting anxiety stories and swap tales of accidents and resilience.

  "She just leans forward like lunges out of the high chair, smacks on the kitchen tile floor. Loud noise. And doesn't scream right away. It was one of those, like, you're building up to a scream. So I grab her, blood all in her mouth... And then here's the scary thing. She just passes out."
  —Connor Larson [02:38]

  The crew discusses the universal panic parents feel when kids get hurt, with Aaron injecting a story about his own dad's priorities as a nervous parent:

  "Instead of getting me out of the pool, my dad got on one knee and goes, 'Now, Tom, you don't throw your brother.' And my mom's like, 'Get the kid.'"
  —Aaron Weber [07:13]

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2. Banter & Comments from Listeners

• [08:43-32:53]
  Dusty reads audience comments spanning podcast nicknames, mowing lawns, and Dusty’s New York Times feature. There’s discussion of show memory, gig preferences, and minor-league hats. Dusty's recent media recognition is playfully roasted:

  "Big write up in the New York Times. This is not the Murfreesboro Quarterly. This is the New York Times. Huge write up about Dusty, about the Nashville comedy scene."
  —Connor Larson [15:11]

• Musical taste disputes and travel playlist debates spark comic tension:

  "I like more things than you. I think that's what the difference is."
  —Connor Larson [11:56]

  "I think you like worse things than me. That's what I think."
  —Dusty Slay [12:00]

---

3. Boat Stories, Living on a Boat, and Life as a Comic

Aaron’s Boat-Dwelling Days

• [35:25-47:11]
  Aaron shares in detail his time living on a 16-foot sailboat in Toronto to chase stand-up comedy:

  "I went to Toronto and then everybody had to tell me. They go, hey man, no one moves to Canada to do entertainment. We're all trying to get visas to go back."
  —Aaron Weber [36:17]

  The group presses for specifics—accommodations, no toilet, a box that “slides closed,” sleeping on a table-turned-mattress, and emptying “pee buckets.” Hilarity ensues as he recalls sinking the dinghy with too many passengers:

  "We maybe make it 10ft and a big boat's coming in. And, dude, I just swapped. Just swamped and the boat immediately. And, I mean, I just jumped off."
  —Aaron Weber [48:07]

Car & Road Comedy Anecdotes

• [51:14-52:12]
  Talk shifts to the etiquette of picking up comics in dirty cars and the importance of car cleanliness on tour.

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4. Getting to the Boats: The Main Topic

Boat Comedy & Performing on Boards

• [54:51-86:43]
  The cast finally steers the conversation toward real boats (and, inevitably, boats in comedy):

  "The two best days of a boat owner's life is when they buy it and when they sell it."
  —Dusty Slay [85:38]

  Connor adds the classic:

  "You know what boat stands for? Bust out another thousand."
  —Connor Larson [85:49]

  Nick and Dusty champion the merits of pontoon boats—relaxed, social, safe. Yachts, houseboats, and kayaks are contrasted. Connor rates kayaks as his personal nightmare, recalling a harrowing story from Argentina involving a wetsuit and an uncomfortable fit.

Being the Host and the Comedy Scene

• [72:31-74:52]
  Famous “Boatman” intro story:

  "He just keeps doing it. And then he goes about the show. Nashville. Anybody watch Nashville? … Well, he wasn't on that. Where he lives."
  —Connor Larson [73:38]

  This becomes a running joke about poor show hosting and dubious road credits.

---

5. Boat Facts, History, and Musings

• [70:05-104:34]

  • Boat History:
    The group riffs on the invention of boats (hollowed logs > the wheel), Polynesian navigation by birds, and the ongoing Nile vs. Amazon 'longest river' debate.

    "Just measure it and let's just go ahead and figure that out."
    —Dusty Slay [70:48]

  • Mariners’ Wisdom & Safety:
    "95% of boating accidents are caused by human error. Not water."
    —Dusty Slay [91:32]

  • Music:
    Boat and sea shanty songs get surprisingly deep coverage. Connor sings “What Shall We Do With a Drunken Sailor,” diving into YouTube sea shanty trends.

  • Jet Ski and Kayak Joys & Woes:
    Jet skis bring universal joy—kayaks, less so.

  • Boat Terminology:

    "A boat technically becomes a ship when it can carry another boat."
    —Nick Kate Bargetze [98:36]

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6. Closing Thoughts & Final Frivolities

• [108:07-end]
  The episode closes with shanty jokes, a brief philosophical inquiry (“Would you ever get in a submarine?”), and the recognition that when it comes to boats, most comics are happiest as the friend of the owner—not the owner themselves.

---

Memorable Quotes

• "You want one to really fall asleep to? I have a personal one where it's just me talking."
  —Dusty Slay [17:05]

• "I don't have a lot else going on. You know what I mean? My life is outside of it. It's pretty sparse. This is kind of... This kind of it."
  —Aaron Weber, on remembering clubs & gigs [23:05]

• "It is a lot—I mean, expensive, right? You know what they say? You know what boat stands for? Bust out another thousand."
  —Connor Larson [85:43]

• "I think boats are cool. I don't like being on them."
  —Dusty Slay [84:47]

---

Thematic Highlights

• Comedy and Risk: The perils of living life for the joke, whether it’s letting your kid fall or sleeping on a fold-down table in a Toronto marina.
• Boating as Metaphor: From parenting panic to comedy gigs gone wrong—being adrift, waves rough, and sometimes needing to ditch (sell) the boat.
• Comedic Camaraderie: Through music, road horror stories, and gentle ribbing, the group navigates the “waters” of creative friendship.

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Listener Guide – Key Timestamps

• Parenting ER Story: [02:00-05:00]
• Listener Comment Highlights & Dusty’s NYT Mention: [14:47-16:38]
• Aaron’s Boat Life in Toronto: [35:35-47:11]
• Boatman & Comedy Hosting Tales: [72:31-74:40]
• Jet Ski vs. Kayak Debate: [88:25-97:30]
• Sea Shanty Music & Shanty Banter: [105:43-109:49]
• Boating Facts & Safety: [91:32-92:03]
• Final Boat Musings: [108:11-end]

---

Summary

Episode 282 of Nateland delivers exactly what long-time fans expect: off-topic hilarity, genuine storytelling, and an “anchor” topic (boats) woven in and out of conversation. Whether recalling ER trips or floating Canadian comedy ambitions, the hosts and guests channel the unpredictability and camaraderie of both boating and stand-up. The result is a relaxed, laugh-heavy episode that turns nautical trivia and misadventures into comedy gold.

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“Anyway, give the sea shanties a try.”
—Connor Larson [109:42]

Transcript

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Dusty Slay]

Okay. Hello, folks. And hey, bear there. Welcome to the Nateland Podcast. My name is Dusty Slay. I'm hosting this week and I got with me Aaron Weber, as always, wearing this brown corduroy shirt that I love so much.

[Connor Larson]

I didn't know it would be this much of a topic of conversation.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm sorry. I loved it so much. He wore it again. And our special guest host with us today, Connor Larson.

[Aaron Weber]

Hey, everybody.

[Dusty Slay]

All right.

[Connor Larson]

Long time friend of Dusty and I of me and Dusty and first time guests.

[Aaron Weber]

That's true.

[Connor Larson]

On the Land podcast. He's been on the road opening for Dusty all over. He's done some shows with me. He's a groomsman in my wedding.

[Dusty Slay]

And we also do a show together on YouTube called Dusty and Connor React. Although the name is always changing so.

[Connor Larson]

It seems pretty good. I don't have to ask what it's about exactly.

[Dusty Slay]

That's what I like.

[Aaron Weber]

A descriptive. I will say that people still do.

[Dusty Slay]

One person said we should call it the Dust Bin.

[Connor Larson]

Why?

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I don't.

[Connor Larson]

Well, your name's Dusty. That's where the dust comes from.

[Dusty Slay]

And they said Connor should change his name to Bin Laden.

[Aaron Weber]

They really did.

[Dusty Slay]

They did say that.

[Connor Larson]

Like Ben Larson.

[Dusty Slay]

Ben Larson. Oh yeah.

[Connor Larson]

It's close, I guess.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Ben Larson. Like Ben Carson. He's a guy too.

[Connor Larson]

Siamese twins.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. But here we are, exciting episode. We are pre recording this so we don't have weekends to talk about.

[Connor Larson]

But I have one thing I want to talk about because I, you know, I had.

We were recording this after Thanksgiving. Yeah, we had our first ER trip with the, with the baby. Oh, no, first, like, you know, you're a parent, you don't know what's going on. You take your kid into the er. I'm told it's very common. You take your kid in because you don't know. What happened was I'm feeding the baby. We're about to fly to Dallas for Thanksgiving. We got a lift picking us up.

[Dusty Slay]

At 10:30am or PM just for context.

[Connor Larson]

10:30Am So I go, all right, 9:45, let me feed the baby and then we'll be ready to get picked up.

[Dusty Slay]

All right.

[Connor Larson]

She finishes the meal. I take the tray off the high chair. The baby just leans forward like lunges out of the High chair, smacks on the kitchen tile floor. Loud noise.

And doesn't scream right away. It was one of those, like, you're building up to a scream. So I grab her, blood all in her mouth. Chip bit her lip or something.

[Dusty Slay]

Blood all in her mouth.

[Connor Larson]

And, you know, our baby doesn't scream, really. She doesn't cry or scream. So when she does, it's like, what is happening, dude? She's screaming like, I never. So I'm just freaking out. I'm like, the lift's coming in 30 minutes. She's got blood all over. I have no idea what to do. So I'm just, like, trying to console her. And she won't. She won't stop crying. And then here's the scary thing. She just passes out.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, no.

[Connor Larson]

Goes to sleep. And that's like. My instinct is that's probably not good. So I start, like, trying to, like. I go, come on, wake up. Won't wake up. The lift's coming in. We got a flight. I was like, we should. You gotta go to the er. So we took her. Took her to the er.

Doctor looked at her. He determined she was fine, basically. Thank God. And then, dude, we got in and out of that Mount Juliet ER in time to make the flight.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Connor Larson]

We ended up. I remember having like, all right, well, Thanksgiving's canceled because we got to go to the er. Yeah. I have to cancel the flight. Eat the flights. Airbnb. Gonna have to eat that. You're doing all that in your head, and the whole time you're like, obviously, hope the baby's fine, but you're like, the whole week. Anyway, it all worked out, but she's got just a nasty black eye right now. The baby does. It didn't come in for like, a day or two, but I was carrying her around the airport. Connor has a joke about, you know, if your girlfriend has a black eye from boxing or something.

[Dusty Slay]

If you date a girl that's a boxer. Yeah. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Always talks about, I don't want to.

[Connor Larson]

Do your whole joke.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

But without context, people are going, what's this comedy about?

[Connor Larson]

But I'm just holding the baby with just a shiner on her all the whole weekend.

[Aaron Weber]

But you gotta get her a big hat.

[Connor Larson]

I mean, it was just a couple hours later, she was back. Back to her form. But it's such a scary thing because you're like. You realize. I don't know. I had a moment where I was like, there's no one around to tell me what to do right now. I mean, my wife And I just had to decide.

[Dusty Slay]

It's so terrifying when they trip and fall and hit their head on a hard floor and you're like, oh, no. But to fall out of the front of the high chair.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, it's about two and a half, three feet up. Is onto tile, like, not carpet. So it just sounded bad. And then it just looked all blood.

[Aaron Weber]

I was just like, oh, but it's a slam dunk. Go get medical help. Not fly. If you go on the flight and you go, I think she's fine. People are going to be like, don't. No, no, no, no, no.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, she's napping, guys.

[Aaron Weber]

She seems tired.

[Connor Larson]

Napping for three hours now. No problem. Yeah. So we got it.

[Aaron Weber]

Are you getting a new high chair? Do the. I would blame the design of the high chair a little bit.

[Guest Advertiser]

No.

[Connor Larson]

You know what happens?

[Dusty Slay]

Forgot to strap around.

[Connor Larson]

It's just the baby's more and more mobile now. But you get used to, like, I got used to. I can take the tray off, turn my back real quick. And she's not gonna. Now she's just. She's moving all over.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, I. It just makes me, like, shiver because I'm like, I know those mo. Like, I had. Sam was like, I have this patio chair where it has a little thing for your feet, but if you're a baby, you step inside of that to come to me. And then when he backed out, tripped over it, and fell and hit his head on the patio, and he's just screaming, and it's just like. And then for a while after that, we thought, he's not talking as well as he used to. And we were like. Like, we were like, he used to say this, and now he doesn't say it anymore. But he's fine.

[Aaron Weber]

He's bad.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, but it's like.

[Aaron Weber]

And you know it's gonna happen. Like, it's like every. Your parents have stories of, like, when you were a baby, you did this thing. So it's like you're just waiting for the day where you go, it's gonna happen. They're gonna do something.

[Connor Larson]

Right? And now I have that perspective now. But the first time that this happens, you don't want to. I thought, how dumb. If we were like, she needed help. And we were like, nah, she's probably fine. And we didn't go take. Take her in or whatever.

[Aaron Weber]

My parents have a great story. I got an older brother, and my. My dad is like a very kind of a. Kind of a nervous parent. My mom's like, if I hit My head. My mom's the one dealing with it. But I guess my brother, when he's like, I'm two, he's four, he threw me in a pool. And instead of getting me out of the pool, my dad got on one knee and goes, now, Tom, you don't throw your brother. And my mom's like, get the kid.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Get the kid.

[Aaron Weber]

First order of operations.

She also told me one time, I guess I think one of us had like a seizure or something. And my mom, who was like the one handling it, goes, I'm gonna go around the side of the house. Cause if your dad sees this, he's gonna melt down. And I go, what a great move to make yourself the meltdown parent.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Where then you're not even involved. You go, I can't handle it.

[Connor Larson]

You don't have to with anything.

[Aaron Weber]

Don't worry about it. I'll bring the kid back later. Like, it's. I think he's kind of a genius.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, that's great.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Good.

[Aaron Weber]

Good move.

[Dusty Slay]

I love that. Your dad's discipline first, then rescue very much.

[Aaron Weber]

You've met my dad. He's always. Good intentions. Maybe. Maybe the decision making on that one was off.

[Dusty Slay]

His dad's a lawyer, and he's done a lot of accident cases or whatever, so he has a lot of warnings about every product.

[Aaron Weber]

He's like the ghost of Christmas Future. He just tells you, like, what could go wrong about anything.

[Connor Larson]

Because he's seen it all. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You go, like, I'm gonna walk the dog. He goes, I don't know.

[Connor Larson]

With a leash.

[Aaron Weber]

A lot of. A lot of people never come back. You're like, I think walking the dog. Most of them come back.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. I've driven Connor on the road, and if you're up behind like a logging truck, Connor's like, why don't you go ahead and. Go ahead and change lanes on this?

[Aaron Weber]

My wife is like the. She can't believe how many things I'm like, that's actually. You should be afraid of that. And she's like, you gotta stop. You got to stop being afraid of that.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. It'll get you.

[Aaron Weber]

I won't stop, but here will get you.

[Connor Larson]

We get these comments.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

The comments come to us from Twitter, or as we call it X and everybody calls it that come From X. Instagram, YouTube, Apple podcast.

[Connor Larson]

Changed it on your. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Apple Podcast reviews.

[Connor Larson]

You reference it again.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, they gave me this pen.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

And so now I'm like, I got to put it to use and [e-mail].

[Connor Larson]

Don'T you love a pen and a paper? Isn't it a good feeling?

[Dusty Slay]

I've been. I've been drawing a little bit. I like to underline things, you know.

[Connor Larson]

Many times I sit down at a desk with a pen and a pad and then don't do anything. Yeah, but it feels good.

[Dusty Slay]

It does feel good. That's why people get mad at us for shuffling the paper.

[Connor Larson]

It feels good.

[Dusty Slay]

But how much are you holding paper these days? It feels good to hold paper. You go, this is real. I can touch this. I can feel this. You can smell it. I bet they smell good. They say you can look at something and know how it would feel on your tongue and know how it would taste. I think they say you would know how it would feel like if you look at this paper. Do you know how that would feel?

[Connor Larson]

I can imagine it.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. But you know, I mean, you know what it would feel like, even. Like to lick the table, I'm sure. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

It's weird that, you know that.

[Connor Larson]

It'd be weird to be surprised by it, you know?

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

It actually feels.

[Aaron Weber]

You'd be blown away.

[Connor Larson]

Quite nice.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

All right.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay, this first one's coming from Willie.

[Connor Larson]

P. Willie P. Is the Willie P.

[Dusty Slay]

Not the comic in Atlanta. That's Willie B. Willie B. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Willie P, I think, is a white phosphorus. That's what they call white phosphorus. And like the military, they call it Willie Pete.

[Aaron Weber]

Really makes it more cheerful.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Drop a little Willie Pete.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Just gassed a village somewhere with Willie.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, maybe that's why this guy made his name that.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Willie P. Wednesdays have slowly started to become my favorite day of the week. It's always great to see the title of the episode and see if more or less than 25% of that episode will actually cover the topic. Less it feel. It always feels like we get to learn right along with Nate and hear his either amazement or utter disgust slash boredom at certain topics. Keep up the good work. I didn't finish the word discuss. I had to do discuss in two parts.

[Connor Larson]

I love the podcast. I love watching people get bored with what you're talking about. Thank you, Willie Pete. That's now. I appreciate it. Thank.

[Dusty Slay]

Thank you, Willie. And I underlined, keep up the good work.

[Connor Larson]

Wednesdays. You know what ruined Wednesdays for a while? You remember that commercial, Hump day. You remember that?

[Dusty Slay]

I love that commercial.

[Connor Larson]

I hated that commercial, dude. It was quoted. I mean, every Wednesday for 10 years.

[Aaron Weber]

I can't tell you how many times I've been on the road with one of you. And then the next week one. And I'll. We'll. We'll talk about something that's going on, and that'll be the. I absolutely love it. I absolutely like in that. Almost like, I can guess, be honest.

[Connor Larson]

Who hates more things?

[Aaron Weber]

It really depends. There's, like, a few topics where I go, oh, he's gonna hate.

[Dusty Slay]

I hate a lot of stuff. I do hate a lot of stuff. You hate a lot of stuff, too. But we. We hate a lot of the same things.

[Connor Larson]

That's true.

[Dusty Slay]

We don't always agree, but we hate a lot of the same.

[Connor Larson]

That's true. We're bonded by hate.

[Dusty Slay]

We mainly lose each other with music, I think, but music's the big one. There's some crossover, but.

[Connor Larson]

Because I think I just. I like more stuff than you. I think that's what the difference.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know. I think you like worse things than me. That's what I think.

[Aaron Weber]

Think the playlists have very little.

[Connor Larson]

It's kind of circular. I like. I like more things. You like less things, I think.

[Dusty Slay]

I think there are things that you can go, well, I like this. You don't like it, that's okay. But then there are also something.

[Connor Larson]

That's how I feel about all of it. I like all the stuff.

[Dusty Slay]

No, but some things I'm like, that's bad, though. Like what I. You know, you'd have to pull it up, but I bet you could, you know, any newer country that.

[Connor Larson]

But I think I like everything that you like. I've never heard music you didn't like.

[Dusty Slay]

Tom Petty. It's a Tom Petty song called Southern Accents that I put on for you one time, and you told me that.

[Aaron Weber]

It sucked.

[Dusty Slay]

And I'll never forget it.

[Aaron Weber]

On a road trip, when you. When you get the Aux, you go, I'm gonna play this. And the other comic goes, no, that's a brutal moment.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. I'll never forget it. I'll never forget it. Change the whole.

[Connor Larson]

The worst is when you're out on a road trip with a. With, like, a friend, and you go, hey, dude, really listen to the lyrics on this one. I want you to, like, listen to.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

The lyrics, and then you can just.

[Connor Larson]

Tell they're not listening to the lyrics.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, and they. And they go, you know what I like? And they go, no, no, this is still going.

[Connor Larson]

Okay, I want you to shut up. Listen.

[Guest Advertiser]

This is.

[Connor Larson]

This is the turn right here.

[Guest Advertiser]

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[Dusty Slay]

Okay, David Bushy. Bushy dash. New York Times article here.

[Connor Larson]

And that's. That mean.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know what that means.

[Connor Larson]

That they were just including the link for us.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay.

[Connor Larson]

That was in the side.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

After Aaron Weber and Brian Bates dog Dusty slave for his recognition in Nashville a few weeks ago. This is hilarious. This has to be addressed on the pod. The public figure strikes again. Hashtag Team Dusty.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I don't think we've mentioned it on the podcast yet, but huge write up in the New York Times.

[Dusty Slay]

Yes, guys.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

This is not the Murfreesboro Quarterly. This is the New York Times. Huge write up about Dusty, about the Nashville comedy scene, about Nate, Leanne. But Dusty's really the focus of this. And my favorite part of the article is where it says Slay, who hosts a podcast with Bargetzi and two others.

And I thought, I'm in the New York Times, dude. I'm one of the others. But very flattering, very nice piece about the Nashville comedy scene about Dusty.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, I would say had Brian and Aaron not humiliated me on the podcast when I won, you know, best local comic, and they really, you know you.

[Connor Larson]

Won the media vote.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, they drugged me through the. The dirt and the mud. And then more media came to my.

[Connor Larson]

More media. I mean the most media. The New York Times came to my wrestling failing. New York Times. I'm just kidding. But it's awesome, man.

[Dusty Slay]

They came to my rescue and they said. Also, I think believe they said at some point in here, I don't know, but I believe they said that I was one of the best working comics today.

[Aaron Weber]

My aunt sent me this article and she said, you know these guys. Which I was grateful because I was wondering, I said, were they at my wedding?

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, that is them. Yeah.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

So thanks, David Bushy, for saying that.

[Connor Larson]

That's very nice.

[Dusty Slay]

Thanks for bringing that up. Because you know what? I wouldn't have brought it up, but I'm glad that it got brought up. Noel Marie. I am a repeat listener. Thank you, Noel. I've listened to several episodes more than once to relax and unwind. I work out, cook, clean, drive, mow, try and fall asleep to this podcast, my favorite. No politics or bs. Thank you all. Pure comedy.

[Connor Larson]

Wow, that's incredibly kind.

[Dusty Slay]

You want one to really fall asleep too? I have a personal one where it's just me talking.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I think the coolest part of that is she said she's mowing. Yeah, that's pretty sweet. Mowing is a good mowing. The lawn. I got big into that this year.

[Connor Larson]

We got our first, like, you got a riding mower?

[Aaron Weber]

I did for my turn for my wedding. So I bought a push mower and everybody in the neighborhood was like, that was not a good decision. It was, it was taking me four hours.

[Connor Larson]

You got a pretty big yard now and then.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. And then they, for my in laws, for our wedding, got us the zero turn.

[Guest Advertiser]

Wow.

[Aaron Weber]

It's. It's the greatest thing besides the wedding that ever happened. It's incredible how much fun it is.

[Dusty Slay]

You know, they, they ordered the zero turn. They told me at the wedding, they go, we got, we ordered him a zero turn and it's coming today. And then we were like. So we were all hanging around.

[Connor Larson]

That's better than Christmas.

[Dusty Slay]

We were hanging around waiting for that thing to come. And eventually I go, I gotta go. We had a babysitter, I gotta go home. And then it came two weeks later or something.

[Aaron Weber]

It came a month later and they left it in the driveway. Just no, like, no knock on the door, just it appeared and I go, I feel like you should have said something. I feel like there should. And I just. Yeah, but it is it is the best gift I got for the whole. I mean, it was pretty awesome.

[Connor Larson]

It's tough to beat, man. Those. Those. Andrew Dorfman, one of the owners of Zany's, has a. Has a farm, and he had a bunch of people over for 4th of July this year, and. And I had told him I always wanted to just ride on one of those big riding lawnmowers just to. Just to do it. And I get there, and he goes, hey, I left a. I left a little patch of land for you out there, all right? And everybody's at the pool having fun, grilling out. And I just mowed, dude. I just mowed his lawn. Yeah, it was unbelievable.

[Dusty Slay]

It's fun to mow. Yeah. I got a zero, turn two, and I let my son rides it with me. I don't know if that's allowed or safe, but I. I go slow. He loves it.

[Connor Larson]

He can't put safety goggles on, of course.

[Dusty Slay]

Right.

[Aaron Weber]

You go. You do this ar. I'll do this arm. Yeah, we'll mind melt like that.

[Dusty Slay]

He loves it.

[Aaron Weber]

He fought.

[Dusty Slay]

He fell asleep on my lap the other day doing it. Ah, it's so great.

[Aaron Weber]

It's the best. Yeah, it's like driving, but there's none of the, like, responsibility of, like, where am I in the road? You know what I mean?

[Connor Larson]

Still kill people.

[Dusty Slay]

Just a blade underneath, though. There is a. There is a blade going pretty fast.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, big one.

[Dusty Slay]

All right, next one comes from Ashley Graham. Yesterday was a horrible day, but I woke up this morning knowing I would get to tune into Nateland a day late, as I always do on Thursday mornings, and that the N Land guys would provide some laughter to give rest to my soul. You guys do so such important work. Thank you for this one today.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

All right.

[Dusty Slay]

You know, Ashley, I'll give you a little. Give you a little something on that horrible day. Would you go ahead and. You're a day late. Would you go ahead and put that podcast on that day?

You know, don't spend the whole horrible day. Go and put it on that day.

[Connor Larson]

You don't gotta wait till the morning, pop it on. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, if it's giving. Rest your soul, as I'm going to underline here, go ahead and pop it on on Wednesday.

You know what I mean?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay, here we go. Oh, this is one of my favorites.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Old friend Joe Foosh Jr. Yeah. Is this the same Foosh?

[Connor Larson]

It's got to be.

[Dusty Slay]

Incredible.

Joe Foose Jr. I just found this podcast a week or two ago, and I Can't get enough. I've always been a Nate and Dusty fan, all right, since I saw them on their seasons of the stand ups, but I had no idea they would be this funny at podcasting too. You guys are killing it. Keep up the guest and rotating regulars.

It makes it more interesting than other pods. Keep it up, guys.

[Connor Larson]

I can tell this guy's new.

[Dusty Slay]

I feel like this is a. This a repeat comment. I feel like. I feel like this is the last one we of his. I don't mind it. I could read this one every podcast.

[Aaron Weber]

No.

[Connor Larson]

Is it the same comment that was in last time?

[Aaron Weber]

That was Joe Fush Senior.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

This is Junior.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. And they love it. They go, listen.

[Connor Larson]

That's really nice.

[Dusty Slay]

Either way, they're rotating regulars.

[Aaron Weber]

It is very nice. It is funny that he saw you do stand up and then was like. And also you can podcast. Like, usually it's the inverse where you go. They can also do stand up, but that is. That is very nice.

[Dusty Slay]

Tim Cochran, what is your dream gig? Where and what venue? Who would open for you? I do feel like that's a repeat.

[Connor Larson]

Probably the San Francisco Punchline there next week. Oh, yeah, Never been.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, you know what? I'm gonna be there next week. I'm gonna be at off the Hook Comedy Club with Connor in Naples. Naples, Florida.

[Connor Larson]

Dream gig.

[Dusty Slay]

My dream. That is my dream gig. Drink. Dream City. Dream venue.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

And come there.

[Connor Larson]

How about what?

[Dusty Slay]

And see us live our dream?

[Connor Larson]

Isn't that crazy? All of us are living our dreams this weekend.

[Dusty Slay]

Come see us live our next weekend. Off the Hook Comedy Club, San Francisco Punchline.

[Connor Larson]

Best club.

[Dusty Slay]

You know, wherever you're at. Sacramento, if you're on the west coast, go to San Francisco.

[Connor Larson]

We got options here.

[Dusty Slay]

If you're in the Southeast, if you're.

[Connor Larson]

In the Northeast, just. Just stay in.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm sure Brian has a show.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. Brian's still sick, by the way. Yeah, I'm sure by now he's better, but when you're recording this, he's still sick. And you can actually see him in Austin, Texas, and Dallas, Texas this weekend too.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

If he's still sick when this comes out. And Houston, we got something going on. You know what I mean? Yeah, that is a good point.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. After like a week from now, it's start to get serious, start to talk.

[Dusty Slay]

About to do another trip to the er.

[Connor Larson]

You know, I have to.

[Dusty Slay]

Alyssa Wren, how can y' all remember every venue and how the show went, etc? It reminds me of listening to golfers talk about every course and what Their scores were. Well, you have incredible memories.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. You also just lie and say they all went well.

[Aaron Weber]

I don't have a lot else going on. You know what I mean? My life is out. Is outside of it. It's pretty sparse. This is kind of. This kind of.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, this is a. This is really special, this next one.

[Connor Larson]

Oh.

[Dusty Slay]

Get ready for this. Mookie Blaylock.

[Connor Larson]

Is that.

[Dusty Slay]

That's not the. That is the Mookie Blaylock.

[Connor Larson]

How do you know that?

[Dusty Slay]

It's the NBA superstar Mookie Blaylock.

[Connor Larson]

Spelled different. And he's asking me about baseball.

[Dusty Slay]

Aaron. Aaron.

[Aaron Weber]

It's him.

[Dusty Slay]

How many minor league hats do you have, and which is your favorite?

[Connor Larson]

Well, I have a New New Jersey Nets hat and Atlanta Hawks hat and a Golden State warriors hat. Mookie Blaylock.

[Dusty Slay]

Are those minor league hats?

[Connor Larson]

No, but if it's the Mookie Blaylock, I want to relate to him.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay.

[Connor Larson]

Those are the teams he played for.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, okay.

[Guest Advertiser]

I have.

[Connor Larson]

Embarrassing to say out loud. I probably have over 100.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Connor Larson]

Probably.

[Dusty Slay]

Who knew there were that many minor league teams?

[Connor Larson]

Well, they all got, you know, a couple options.

[Dusty Slay]

Chattanooga's building a new stadium. Have you seen. Yeah. You know that when you're going down the interstate into Chattanooga, where that old warehouse is? Yeah, they're building it right at that old warehouse.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, good.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Tearing that down.

[Connor Larson]

Let's take a lane out of the interstate, too, while we're at it.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

I mean, let's just make it even.

[Dusty Slay]

Worse to drive Cheryl Carner at a baseball game. I overheard an older man use Eddie Murphy's material from Raw to hit on a much younger girl.

He presented the anecdotes as his own.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I couldn't help myself. I joined in unison with him on the last two punchlines. He stormed off and gave me a death stare. I think it took 10 years off my life. Was it worth it? Did I do the right thing? What would you do?

[Aaron Weber]

I mean, she. Absolutely. That's. That's the best thing I heard all day.

[Dusty Slay]

I gotta disagree.

[Aaron Weber]

Was you. Okay.

[Connor Larson]

I'm just thinking of the very first bit from that.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. I am trying to imagine which bit he does. Let me. This will get her.

[Dusty Slay]

I just.

[Aaron Weber]

So, wait, what do you think? You think.

[Connor Larson]

I think you should have let.

[Dusty Slay]

I think Cheryl should have mine her own business.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Wow.

[Dusty Slay]

Let the guy. I mean, he memorized Eddie Murphy's material just for this moment.

[Aaron Weber]

I don't know if this is why.

[Dusty Slay]

He memorized or maybe. Maybe Cheryl really wanted to go out with a guy. And Cheryl was like, you know what? I know. Maybe that's what should have happened. The guy should have gone, oh, you know this. Let's go on a date. Cheryl, respond to us, let us know, would you have gone on a date with this guy?

[Aaron Weber]

I think the only thing that I'm starting to come around because I would have liked to know, could he. Did it work if he successfully. If this girl goes, yeah, I met him. And he said, like they're telling how they met years later, people going, is that from raw? Like that would be worth having happen?

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, can you imagine? They're sitting at home one night and they're just watching. And she goes, you got those things you told me you got from this guy?

[Connor Larson]

I saw a guy in front of me at a basketball game trying to hit on a young girl with emo Phillips material.

Just trying to think of a random guy.

[Aaron Weber]

I met my wife doing Bernie Mac.

[Connor Larson]

Steven Wright. I put spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

[Aaron Weber]

That's a good one, though.

[Dusty Slay]

Neil Hamburger. Why are Aaron J. It's so sweet how completely opposite Dusty and Aaron's upbringings were, and yet they are close enough that Dusty was in his wedding.

[Connor Larson]

Were they that opposite?

[Dusty Slay]

Can you believe it? Can you believe it that in this world, a man that grew up as poor as me could one day achieve heights like to be an Aaron's wedding.

From the trailer park.

[Connor Larson]

You're projecting a little bit from the.

[Dusty Slay]

Trailer park to a wedding.

Wow.

[Aaron Weber]

It is amazing.

[Dusty Slay]

How do I do it?

[Connor Larson]

Was it that different?

[Dusty Slay]

I don't think so.

[Connor Larson]

Fundamentally.

[Dusty Slay]

You had silver spoons under your couch.

[Connor Larson]

We didn't use them.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

How Alyssa C. Oh, how come there's always a bunch of we miss Dusty and glad to see Dusty back comments, but they never get addressed on the pod. Oh, Oh, I like where you're going with this, Alyssa. I didn't know at the beginning they don't have to be read on the pod. But it would be nice to see hear Dusty get his props from his pod mates. He's the best. Yeah. Circle that. Alyssa C. Shout out Alyssa, my new favorite podcast listener.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, let me take a break from talking about the New York Times write up just to say, hey, Dusty, give you your props, man. You're doing great.

[Dusty Slay]

People missed me.

[Connor Larson]

Keep it up.

[Dusty Slay]

And they're glad to see them back.

[Aaron Weber]

Keep it army, dude. The Dusty Army.

[Dusty Slay]

All right, two more to go. I didn't skip any, but I do think it seems like the army is not doing well.

[Aaron Weber]

The thought that Counts.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Yeah. Catherine Stowe. Dusty, don't put your coffee beans in the freezer. It causes condensation on them and they lose their flavor. Oh, wow.

[Connor Larson]

Interesting.

[Dusty Slay]

I got several bags in the Fringe right now. Just keep them in an airtight container in your pantry. Yeah, just any old airtight container.

[Connor Larson]

Don't they come in an airtight?

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know. I learned this from a guy that ran a coffee farm in Nicaragua. Oh, well, he probably didn't have a freezer.

[Aaron Weber]

Listen, you're both not wrong.

[Connor Larson]

Why do you. So why do you. Why do you keep them in the freezer?

[Dusty Slay]

Well, I. I just felt like it was preserving the freshness of them.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh.

[Connor Larson]

Do you keep a lot of stuff in the freezer?

[Dusty Slay]

Well, yeah. I mean, a decent amount.

[Connor Larson]

You put bread in the freezer, stuff like that?

[Dusty Slay]

I do, yeah. If I buy. Sometimes I'll buy a lot of bread.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Dusty Slay]

And then I'll put it in the freezer, and then it thaws out. It's still good. And. But this is good info. I am happy to know this. I appreciate this, Catherine. I'm making jokes, but I am. I do appreciate what you.

[Connor Larson]

Stow that away.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Appreciate that. Last 1. Rachel McLaughlin in the arms of the angel. I may have missed y' all talking about this earlier on the podcast, but I just watched Dusty's latest special and noticed his hat. Did he make an exact replica of his Kodiak hat with.

[Aaron Weber]

With.

[Dusty Slay]

With his cat phrase. Catchphrase, cat phrase for the special taping. My husband thought it might be because he needed to cover the branding for his special. Well, you know what? I did do that, Rachel. I did do it. I made my own hat. And it was for that reason, because we were worried that Kodiak, for whatever reason, might be up. I don't know why, but Kodiak might be upset about me wearing the hat. Right. So we made our own version of the hat.

[Connor Larson]

That's very cool.

[Dusty Slay]

And we sold a limited amount with the str. Stripes on the side. So those are all gone.

[Connor Larson]

Wow.

[Dusty Slay]

We sold. Yeah, it was only about.

[Connor Larson]

Did you autograph them?

[Dusty Slay]

No.

If you bring. If you wear that hat to my show, I will autograph it for you.

[Connor Larson]

Wow.

[Dusty Slay]

And I. But it's.

[Connor Larson]

While you're on stage.

[Dusty Slay]

While I'm on stage.

[Connor Larson]

Throw it on stage.

[Dusty Slay]

Yep. And with, you know, some money in there. And.

[Aaron Weber]

And.

[Dusty Slay]

But the. But yeah, we. And now I'm gonna start selling them again, but without the stripes, because it was expensive to get the stripes on there, so very limited amount with the stripes.

[Connor Larson]

Have you ever heard. I think we're. Hopefully we're gonna have him on the podcast soon, but that's one of my favorite stories with Monty Mitchell, longtime Nashville comic. So funny. Everybody loves Monty. So funny. When he was at south street in Jackson, people started throwing change at him. He was bombing. People start throwing change at him, like quarters and stuff. And he was like, whatever. Just started picking them all up, put them in his pocket, and left the stage.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

He said, I'm not just gonna let this go to waste.

[Aaron Weber]

Wow.

[Dusty Slay]

I love that. And that is also shocking to me because I did South Street a bunch of times and I bombed. Never bad enough to get change thrown at me. But you would think that would be Monty's crowd.

[Connor Larson]

I've worked with him there, and he demolished. I think sometimes it's just the perfect storm of. I think he may be antagonized.

[Aaron Weber]

I was going to crowd a little bit.

[Connor Larson]

I'm leaving out details of this. Okay, let's say there was a build.

[Dusty Slay]

Up that was a bad. It was a bad club. Liked Harvey. I liked the guy that ran it, but it was a bad club.

[Connor Larson]

And it's one of your first gigs ever, right?

[Aaron Weber]

My first ever road gig. And you know who the headliner was? Dusty's wife.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

First ever. I remember calling my dad, going, I got a hotel room.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

And he was like, is it good? And I go, let's not get distracted.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

And then we just drove home the next day. That was a. That was a welcome to comedy gig.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a terrible place. Terrible.

[Aaron Weber]

Plus, they had a funny sign. I remember it said at the time, hogan, Hannah Hogan. And then under it said, dishwasher wanted. And I go, you got to put these on other sides of the. You got to put on the other side of the sign. Don't put it under it.

[Dusty Slay]

You know, they. When I did it, I headlined Friday and Saturday, and they had. They told me that the sales were pretty low for the Friday show. And then when I showed up, they only had Saturday on the marquee. And I go, well, maybe go ahead and put both. Both show dates up there.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. But I've noticed clubs like to tell you that the ticket sales are low. When I go headline, they're always saying.

[Connor Larson]

They're always. Isn't that crazy?

[Aaron Weber]

I go, this is like your thing, guys.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. And they're saying it more and more.

[Aaron Weber]

I go, yeah, of course they're low. It's a Friday.

[Connor Larson]

It's a Friday. What do you want it's not really a comedy night.

[Guest Advertiser]

Wait till.

[Aaron Weber]

Wait till it do.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay. All right. Well. Okay. So we're gonna take the break.

[Connor Larson]

We are gonna take a break and you won't even notice a thing happen like it never even happened. Serve pro.

[Guest Advertiser]

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[Commercial Narrator]

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[Dusty Slay]

All right. Okay. Thank you for your comments guys. That was really great. We appreciate you sending those in and now we're going to get in today's topic with a extra special guest. Please give it up for Nick Kate Bargetze.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Thanks for having me, guys.

[Dusty Slay]

Bring in the big guns.

[Connor Larson]

Call in a few favors.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

This week's topic is gonna be on boats. So we wanted to have it be extra funny.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Perfect. Because we got the bottom and the top.

[Dusty Slay]

Exactly.

[Aaron Weber]

The keel and I don't remember what the crow's nest up there.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, we want to cover it all.

[Aaron Weber]

That's what it is.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

We want to make sure everybody's covered.

[Aaron Weber]

And.

[Dusty Slay]

And not only is Connor also comic, he's a boat expert.

[Aaron Weber]

I'm a boat comedian.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, but.

[Dusty Slay]

And. And Aaron's wearing this shirt.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You're performed on a boat.

[Aaron Weber]

I've never performed on a boat, but I lived on a boat when I started stand up, so. So less good version of being a boat comedian. Yeah. I lived there for.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think you would perform on them, but why would you not get into some cruises?

[Aaron Weber]

I don't know.

[Connor Larson]

You think that's like a sales pitch?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

To the cruise company. Listen, I live on a boat, so obviously I could do it, handle it.

[Aaron Weber]

How's your comedy? I go, that's not what we're here.

[Connor Larson]

Were you good enough at the time to do cruises when you're. No.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I wasn't good enough to do land.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I was.

[Aaron Weber]

I was. It was a tough. When I started comedy, like, everybody. I was terrible.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And you were in Toronto, right?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I went to Toronto and then everybody had to tell me. They go, hey, man, no one moves to Canada to do entertainment. We're all trying to get visas to go back.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Where are you from?

[Aaron Weber]

Florida.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

They were like this guy. They thought I was an interesting guy.

[Dusty Slay]

And they're like, you moved from Florida to Canada on a boat?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. That's where it's got to be. What podcast do you listen to that made that suggestion?

[Aaron Weber]

The Robinson Caruso comedy podcast. Like, no, I just.

[Dusty Slay]

The Edmund Fitzgerald.

[Aaron Weber]

It was a thing where I just, like, stopped saying it after a while because it would inevitably people be like, hold on. Walk me through how you've made all these mistakes. Like, it. I just stopped doing. I started going, I'm just visiting.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm just visiting.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

First stop, New York City. Everybody gets off. I guess Toronto. We are going.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. It was a great time, man. It was.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But I'm saying you could do cruises now because you lived on a boat. Like, if. So, like, right now, if you got.

[Aaron Weber]

Again, I don't think that's why I could do it now.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think that's the only way, because you're coming. Go do it there, brother, because it's gonna get. You need some boat stuff.

[Aaron Weber]

That's true.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's how I would. I will. I'll get a hold of my cruise agent. I had a cruise agent, and at one point I'll get a hold of her and I go, I got a guy and I go, I think he's got a decent 30 on boats. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

And he's lived on.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Go. Now she goes on boats. I go, that's out of the gate.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I go, I'm not. She goes, what about his land stuff? I go, look, I don't know about his land material, but I know he's got a decent 30 on boats. I think he can make some of that land stuff become boat stuff.

[Aaron Weber]

I think I could. I could retrofit it, but I never aspired to be a sea comedian, you know what I mean?

[Connor Larson]

Like.

[Aaron Weber]

Like to get out there. I was like. I was always trying to get to the land, which I thought was where it was at.

[Dusty Slay]

A lot of people work from the land and then end up cruises. You started on the boat, now you're on land.

[Connor Larson]

Was it a boat? You actually sounds so dumb. Was it just a boat that was docked?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Have y' all been talking about this or.

[Connor Larson]

No, we just brought it up.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Okay, so you're from Florida. You lived on a boat in Florida?

[Aaron Weber]

No, no, I had a whole family and home and, and regular life. I. I just.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Like your wife and kids at home.

[Aaron Weber]

I go, see you and I undo the rope and they. I go, I'll be back and I'll bring you. No, I graduated school and I had like. What school? Florida State.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, I graduated Florida State.

[Aaron Weber]

Florida State.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, hold on. Don't skip right to that.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I had no boat experience prior to this.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Aaron Weber]

Except that my. I mean, my dad was like a big sailing guy, so it was always. It was a reasonable idea.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Dusty Slay]

This gets classier as you go along.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But you have a ton of.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, you go, I flat rated from. Graduated Florida. My dad's a sailor.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Sailboat. Hold on.

[Connor Larson]

That's why I'm saying it wasn't a linear path to Florida State from the.

[Aaron Weber]

From where?

[Connor Larson]

From childhood?

[Aaron Weber]

No, no. I attended a few of the finer community colleges in Florida and Jimmy John's University for a year. Yeah, I had a very non linear path to the boat.

[Connor Larson]

Okay. Yeah, yeah. I just want to make sure you didn't come out, go to Florida State, then Go live on a sailboat.

[Aaron Weber]

No, I don't want people to think I'm brilliant.

Straight to Florida, stay here.

But, yeah, I did eventually make it to Florida State.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Did you go to Toronto so you could do your comedy in French?

[Aaron Weber]

I got a language barrier. People don't like what I say in this language. No, I really went, just. Cause I, you know, comedy's such a. You're like, how do I get into it? And I had a cousin who goes, you can live on this boat for free. And I go, I know. Free rent will be a big part of my comedy journey. So that's why I went up there. And then I. It was kind of great. Cause you're.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Wait, his boat was in Toronto?

[Aaron Weber]

Yes, he lives in Toronto.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, so the boat was in.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, the boat's in Toronto.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You have a cousin in Toronto?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, he's. Well, the cousin's his wife, but I call him cousin for ease of telling the story.

[Dusty Slay]

My cousin in law.

[Aaron Weber]

My cousin in law. But I had never met him. Isn't that. He just told me. He goes, I used to live on this boat. Now I'm married. I obviously can't keep living on a boat. It's a tiny little boat.

[Connor Larson]

You went to Toronto on a whim to live on a boat with a guy you'd never met?

[Aaron Weber]

He wasn't on the boat.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Aaron Weber]

That would have really changed it up. This is the boat bunk bed.

[Connor Larson]

Your cousin's not even just your cousin's husband. Okay.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But you go live on a boat. That's why you go to Toronto, because you go live on a boat for free. Because there wasn't. You couldn't have done it in Florida. I would imagine you could have just as easily lived on a boat for free.

[Aaron Weber]

Well, I knew. I knew Tallahassee didn't have a comedy scene that I knew about. I was like, toronto?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You looked everywhere from your balcony.

It's like, it's not here.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I didn't know. I just was a dumb kid. And I went, I know there's some there.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I get it.

[Aaron Weber]

And then I went. And it. The great thing is, when you're new and horrible, all those people, once you leave, they can't prove you were there. You know what I mean? Like, all my six months, get good.

[Dusty Slay]

In a place and then leave.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Does you have. Does anybody in Toronto go, yeah, no, I remember you.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I know a few of the guys from, like, Ryan Long was there when I was there, and a few of the other people were still long.

[Dusty Slay]

And did you know.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

The same size.

[Connor Larson]

Guys, only guys built like.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I'm supposed to be there.

[Connor Larson]

Did you know Dusty's wife when you're up there?

[Aaron Weber]

I did not. I did not know her, but I think she was like a Yuck Yucks comic or something.

[Dusty Slay]

She did do Yuck Yucks. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. And a bunch of comics now who were there at the time, just, like, at a higher level than me, but not just, you know, doing it locally. Yeah, yeah, they were. I think Steph Taleb was there. I think Robbie Hoffman was there.

[Connor Larson]

Graham K. Was here.

[Aaron Weber]

I saw him on a show.

[Connor Larson]

He was probably in New York by then. Right.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

When was this?

[Aaron Weber]

This would have been 2015.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He moved back and I don't remember when he got. He might have been there.

[Aaron Weber]

I think I saw him headline at a Yuk Yucks. Because I saw him later in Colorado and was like. I was in Toronto and he was like, right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, That's a big country. That's what he said.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And you weren't even on it. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

He goes, what shows were you on? I go, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's not what's happening.

[Dusty Slay]

Toronto's a good scene, though.

[Aaron Weber]

It is a good. I mean, there's a shocking number of the comics who have left Toronto and now are doing something.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, there's nowhere to go from Toronto except the U.S. yeah. But it's. It's a good.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Were you there during the winter?

[Aaron Weber]

I was there. I got there in April, and then I was there till, like, the beginning of November when they were like. I was like, it's getting cold. I gotta. I gotta get off this boat.

[Dusty Slay]

Did the boat have a heater?

[Aaron Weber]

The boat had a space heater that I plugged in, but it didn't have, like a. It had a. Dude, everything was dual use.

[Connor Larson]

Tell me about the boat. Was it how nice? How nice was it not? Listen, were you misled? Were you misled about it, or did you know that you'd be walking in?

[Aaron Weber]

No, I think I was, like, romanticizing it. I was like, I'm doing this crazy thing. I'm an artist, dude. It's like camping where you picture the. Like the sunrise, but then the rest of the day you're like, I'm pretty uncomfortable. You know what I mean? Like, so no. No toilet on the boat. You have. You got a box that slides closed, and then if you want to. If you gotta walk up to the marina.

[Dusty Slay]

What do you mean, a box that slides close?

[Aaron Weber]

If you just gotta go number one, there's a box on the boat. And it's literally the system is you pull a handle and it opens up and then you close it and it.

[Dusty Slay]

Dumps it into the ocean.

[Aaron Weber]

You're not supposed to do that, but that is what you do. Yeah, I will say. And I definitely had a few nights coming home from an open mic. Like, you know, my three minutes didn't go great, and I'm emptying out a pee bucket.

I go, I hope no one sees this. And there were other people in the marina, and they were. I was like, I hope none of them saw me do this.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Is it kind of like when you walk your dog and it poops and you're, like, hoping you're, like, it's exact?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You go, yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

But then it's kind of a code of, like, they're probably doing it too.

[Dusty Slay]

So where would you dump it otherwise?

[Aaron Weber]

I think you're supposed to take it to, like, a.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Sounds like guy that never did it.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He doesn't even know where you're supposed to.

[Aaron Weber]

Never want to once did it. Never even really considered it, honestly. I just went, this is water and this is yellow water.

[Connor Larson]

What body of water is this that you're in?

[Aaron Weber]

One of the Great Lakes.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, it's not the Atlantic?

[Aaron Weber]

No, no. The Toronto's in. Yeah. I'm trying to remember. It was one of the big lakes, but it's one of those lakes that you think is.

[Connor Larson]

Okay, Lake Ontario.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Huge lake.

[Aaron Weber]

Huge lake.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. Basically an ocean.

[Aaron Weber]

And there's an island in Toronto called Toronto Island. That's, like, very fun. It's like Coney island kind of.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Aaron Weber]

And then you kind of go out there. I had a.

[Connor Larson]

You go dump it out there.

[Aaron Weber]

If you type in Leslieville, that is the marina, or that's the neighborhood where the marina was. I think it's called Outer Banks Marina.

[Connor Larson]

That's even Old Toronto.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, it should be. It should. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

See that little strip of land right here?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

The water shot on yellow right there.

[Aaron Weber]

Ash Bridger's Bay, they downgraded it to good lake because I kept dumping stuff in there somewhere in here.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What was that there? What's that one out there? The Rocky.

[Connor Larson]

The Rocky Point.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Rocky Point Point. So if you got to go number two, do you just do the thing and you go, I'm gonna go swing out to Rocky Point.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, that was what he called it. We go, you're going to Rocky Point.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Would you go grab a newspaper and then head out to Rocky Point? And just so you didn't have to.

[Aaron Weber]

It Was. It was a long walk. It was a long walk.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

If you were like, I don't picture you walking. And I think you ride your boat. Why is that one boat out in the middle doing nothing?

[Dusty Slay]

And then you go anchoring down.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He anchors.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm anchored down at a rocky point.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And then you come back in and you go, wow, what'd you go out there for? You go, just seeing how deep it was up there.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, it was. It was. There were some characters in the marina.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You eating Taco Bell. And you run into your boat and you get in here and then you're just trying to get out far enough.

[Connor Larson]

There was a dingle it.

[Aaron Weber]

The dinghy was how you got around. So there's the sailboat, which was like 16ft. And then there was like a five foot, like, plastic dinghy. And it was awesome. That thing was. That's how you zipped around the marina.

[Connor Larson]

Oh. So like almost I'm picturing like survivors, like from a crash, like inflatable.

[Aaron Weber]

It's got a motor. It's a little better than that. It's one step up from that.

[Dusty Slay]

You had a bit of an experience on that dinghy one time.

[Aaron Weber]

I might have sank it. I did sink it. I sank it one time. I only sank it one time, though.

[Dusty Slay]

He said he had another comic.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, this dude. I'll give you the whole humiliation.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So you mean the floaty dinghy that.

[Dusty Slay]

Like on Tommy Boy, when he's out there with that girl and his. Oh, and his dad's like, quit playing with your dinghy. It's like. That's what the boat's called.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Oh, the boat's called a dinghy.

[Aaron Weber]

Yes, exactly like that. Except it had a. It was a little more substantial. It had like a. Had a seat and a thing, but. And a motor.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So the boat. So you're on a boat and that's how you would go around you. The actual boat you're living on, you don't really ever move.

[Aaron Weber]

We took it out sailing a few times because my cousin would come down and sail. But like, I took it out once, but. But I was already. Once I sank the little boat, I go, I should probably leave the big boat.

[Connor Larson]

Did it have a name? Did it have a name?

[Aaron Weber]

It was knife in Italian. I can't remember. I don't remember what that is, but it was knife in Italian.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That sounds like cousin you don't mess with.

[Aaron Weber]

He was the best.

Yeah. I think that might have been a different.

[Connor Larson]

Like a slime.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

A fork.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Type in fork in Italian. He goes he might have messed up. Yeah, Forchetta. Yeah, that sounds more right.

[Guest Advertiser]

Forqueta.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Forget that.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. But I did have a. It was perfect pronunciation. They're really coming so far.

There was a comic who was like a legit comic, and he said he had a gig on the other side of the city. And I'm trying. Anything I can do to make some inroads. So I go, I could drive you to the gig in a boat. You could avoid all the traffic. Which was true if it had just been him. But then he goes, great. And then he points to these three girls that he's gonna bring. And I go, all right. And at that point, I didn't know enough to go like, hey, this just can't happen.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

So we get out there and I told Dusty this. I saw a boat like a month earlier called a Boston Whaler, which is the whole lore of it, is if you cut it in half, it won't sink. They're, like, unsinkable. And my cousin goes, yeah, but they have holes in the back. The water comes out. I took that to mean no boats can sink. That's like. I was 23. I was an idiot. So we go out, the nose of the boat is like this. I mean, we maybe make it 10ft and a big boat's coming in. And, dude, I just swapped. Just swamped and the boat immediately. And, I mean, I just jumped off. I remember a girl, her phone was in the little glove box. She goes, my phone? I just got a guy's number. I need my. I go, get off the. You gotta get off the boat. I don't know. Whatever happened to your phone. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. And then we. Yeah, I had to call. We had to get the crane. I had to call my cousin who's, like, a great guy, and go, hey.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You'Re, like, all wet. You're just got in the. You're in the water.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Great legacy.

[Connor Larson]

It's gotta be.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Swim back.

[Dusty Slay]

Ice cold.

[Connor Larson]

But we're not far.

[Aaron Weber]

We're not. We're like where the door is from. Where it should be.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Is it? Yeah. Freezing cold.

[Aaron Weber]

It's pretty cold. The lakes stay cold, like, even in the summer. The lake is, like, shocking.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

But the. So I just swim back. Everybody gets on shore, and then you go through. I call my cousin, go, remember that boat? I sank it. And then we had to get, like, union guys to operate a crane to pull it out. And it. I mean, he was like, we did keep driving It. The motor was, like, shockingly resilient, but.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And did that guy make his gig?

[Aaron Weber]

No. You know what? We don't talk. I don't know what happened to that guy.

[Connor Larson]

Did he ever book you on anything?

[Aaron Weber]

He didn't book me, and I still send him a veils anywhere that's not near the water.

[Dusty Slay]

You're like, I'll drive. I'll drive you.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's what I love about comics is it's two dumbs do not make. They don't make a right. But I understand. I'm calling myself that in that situation because I can see being bugged.

[Dusty Slay]

Both.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I understand that you can. Like, dude, we could get there super quick. And then the other dumb's like, yeah, dude, that makes sense. Because, like, he's not as right as. You're not as right. Neither one of you are right. But you get in there together and you just go, like, of course this is going to work. And then it. Then it does what it does well. And if you're. Did you have a joke about it ever?

[Aaron Weber]

That's all my. The first year, all I had was like, I live on a boat.

[Connor Larson]

You were the boat comic.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's good, though.

[Aaron Weber]

That's all I had.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's what you should.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, yeah. And it was like, then I had to. After a while, I couldn't be like, hey, two years ago, I lived on a boat. Like, it was like, all right, I'm writing this stuff.

[Connor Larson]

This can't.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

It was great, though. I kind of blame him. But the other day, we did that gig in Ohio, and we were doing another spot after, like, an indie show, and a guy after, he goes, you know, good set or whatever. And I was like, oh, are you a local comic? And he goes, yeah. And I go, you want to drive me to the gig? I'll just cancel the Uber. And he's like, sure. And then I get in his car and I realize, like, this car is like three tires that should not be driving. Like, it was.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

The same situation where I think he thought, like, oh, this is good. This guy's working the club and I'm networking. But it was just a. We would all been better off not doing that. You know what I mean? That kind of the same scenario.

[Connor Larson]

You remember when you had a car, it was so dirty, and then you had to give somebody you cared about a ride, and you're like, I need about 30 minutes with my car before you even sit in this thing.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, that's like, when comics do come, like, like, crackers Indianapolis. They used to always have the host come pick up the feature and the headliner. And then it would be like a 30 minute drive to the club and the host show up and his car was filthy. I'm like, we just find out just now that you're going to be picking us up. You couldn't do a little something here? Like, I don't need the car to be exquisite, but don't, you know, get the fast food bags out of the seat.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Throw your. Throw the trash away.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's all you want.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You don't have to vacuum it. Just throw the trash.

[Dusty Slay]

Exactly.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. It's frustrating when someone gets in your car and you're like, you didn't see it coming. You're like, God. Oh, man. Try to get rid of everything thing that as I get out of the car. I won't sit with it in the car just because I. I don't even like moving. When you got jackets and hats and you're just trying to throw stuff somewhere.

[Connor Larson]

There's a car wash right by my house and I got the. They talked me into it, but it was easy. Like the VIP pass or whatever. I can go as often as I.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Want for you or the car.

[Connor Larson]

Come on.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I know. I just was trying to just walk.

[Connor Larson]

Through it all the way.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. I just didn't know if this story was gonna be funny, so I was trying to get a job.

[Connor Larson]

It's not going to be funny.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Exactly. So try to make it easy.

[Aaron Weber]

Saying I can go as often as I want.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

About a car wash is very fun.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

As you just walk.

[Connor Larson]

I don't got to pay. I just pay once a month.

[Aaron Weber]

But it sounds like you were like. They were like, come back tomorrow. You've been here. You've been here this week. All right. Don't space it out.

[Connor Larson]

How to pay everything.

[Dusty Slay]

How often do you go?

[Connor Larson]

I go probably every other day.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Connor Larson]

Because the vacuums and everything is what that lady's like.

[Dusty Slay]

I didn't think you would be doing it. This, this.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

They're losing money on me, baby.

[Dusty Slay]

There's vacuums by my house that are for free.

[Guest Advertiser]

They don't even.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I could go through a car washer. I don't know if I could vacuum. I could maybe I could see it.

[Connor Larson]

But I could as well on the way out.

[Dusty Slay]

What's going on?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I can see going through a car wash every day.

[Dusty Slay]

What's going on in your car that you're vacuuming every other day?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What are we talking about here, man? What's going On.

[Connor Larson]

Well, it's baby stuff now.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That.

[Connor Larson]

That changes everything.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. It's not. It's not. It's. And also baby stuff, right?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, that's right.

[Aaron Weber]

Your baby's eating Big Macs.

[Dusty Slay]

What's going on?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, my God. Your baby. Wait a second. Your baby had a Whopper. You go, yeah, my baby's into Whoppers.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You just go, yeah, dude. What do you feel?

[Aaron Weber]

Babies.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's the new baby formula.

[Dusty Slay]

She's got a black eye. I had to fight her off. Sorry.

[Connor Larson]

Fighter off.

[Aaron Weber]

Sorry.

[Connor Larson]

Baby has a black eye right now.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He didn't.

[Dusty Slay]

His baby fell.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Anyway, I thought the joke would be a bigger hit. I'll be honest.

[Connor Larson]

That was good.

[Dusty Slay]

Maybe we get into some boating things.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Sad.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, He's. He wasn't here for the.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's okay. He could have laughed it off, but you made it sad.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, he did.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But then we thought it was out of line, you know?

[Connor Larson]

You don't think I laugh off stuff? Well, on this podcast, dude, I think you do.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think that moment, I felt like a real.

[Aaron Weber]

Wow.

[Dusty Slay]

These. You know, I've never crossed the line. Yeah, he did, didn't he?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, we. You know, Nate wasn't here when the whole Nashville scene thing happened.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah, that was this podcast.

[Dusty Slay]

Guess. No. Well, we talked about it a little bit because we had a comment about it where Aaron and Brian diminished all my accomplishments.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Search that on YouTube.

[Connor Larson]

Certainly a way.

[Aaron Weber]

On YouTube.

[Connor Larson]

Search. Certainly one way of framing it.

You were talking about when Aaron and Brian dehumanized me publicly on the podcast.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

A car wash for the boat would have been incredible. I would tell you that the inside of that boat was like, are there.

[Connor Larson]

Not equivalents for boats?

[Aaron Weber]

I mean, there might be, but I. Whatever there is for boats doesn't mean I knew or found out about it. Did you.

[Connor Larson]

You have to clean the boat regular. Was this the agreement that you would maintain the boat?

[Aaron Weber]

My cousin said nothing. He said, you can live on this boat, and that's it. And he never checked on. He. Like, he was really letting me live free.

[Dusty Slay]

It was.

[Aaron Weber]

I had a George Foreman.

[Dusty Slay]

He never checked until he sank the boat.

[Aaron Weber]

I'm telling you, even then, he was kind of like, things happen. Like, he's the man. I still see him. He's a great guy. They came to. I did a whatever comedy bar this year up there. Okay. And they came to the shows and they were like, oh, that's why you were so sad.

[Connor Larson]

I'm doing that in two Weeks with you, by the way.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, yeah. Maybe they'll come to the show. That'd be cool.

[Dusty Slay]

Here's some. I never seen the notes before. These are not done by Brian. I don't know who did these, but this is very good.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, this is good.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, wow.

[Connor Larson]

We got a lot of boat stuff.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, we got actual notes.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Isn't that nice?

[Dusty Slay]

This is. This is another name.

[Connor Larson]

How efficient things are when Brian.

Finally we're running like a real.

[Dusty Slay]

This is really organized. Potential warm up questions. Probably shouldn't read it like that, but I just want to know how impressed I am by it. Did any of you guys grow up boating?

[Connor Larson]

I think we're past.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, but we know Connor.

[Connor Larson]

We just got into introduce yourself for the podcast list.

[Dusty Slay]

We know that Connor grew up boating.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, I did. My dad used to.

[Connor Larson]

He said his dad was a sailor.

[Dusty Slay]

But we don't know if Nate came from.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Nate?

[Connor Larson]

You think Nate came from a boat?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, my dad's a lawyer, so it would be hard to. Hard to beat the accusations.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Oh, my God. Sailing fsu. And he wants to go. Yeah, yeah, he had to go. He had to go move to live like you.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, I know.

[Connor Larson]

He had to go slum it in Toronto.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Comedy is great for really being like, I want to see how the other half lives. All right, you go start doing open mic comedy, you will make no m.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, well, then that's what's beautiful about comedy is you will go do something like live in a boat because you're just so blinded and obsessed and, like, in love with. With it that you just throw everything out there. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

And it gives it this, like, it makes it. It's like a mirage where you're like, no, no, this is cool. And then all your friends are like, I'm telling you, like, objectively, what you're doing is not cool.

[Dusty Slay]

You got a pee bucket from the.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Outside and it's not good.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. And then I, you know, why would you even.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Would you just pee off the boat?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, but. But occasionally you, like, it would be daytime.

There's other people.

[Connor Larson]

Is it a busy marina?

[Aaron Weber]

It was a busy marina. And the dude, this marina was like central casting. Like, I. I'm not making this up. I would come home from an open mic where I had done poorly, and you're walking down the marina and there was a guy who'd be on his boat every night playing that song by the band player. Baby, come back. I swear, he would just be. It would just be playing. Baby, come back and I'd be like, dude, come on already. I'm already sad. Please don't do that.

[Dusty Slay]

He's sad too.

[Aaron Weber]

I mean, he was very.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Did she have like some cold nights, like towards the end, I guess? November?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. I found out there's a thing when to keep, like the. To keep the ice. Cause you know, a lot of the stuff ice over. They have a bubbler. Cause it just emits like a thing that makes a bubble. So nothing freezes because it can't, you know, get me still long enough. And once people started telling me about that, I was like, I gotta get back to America. I gotta get out of here.

[Dusty Slay]

Gotta get back to Florida where nothing.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Would you be like free freezing when you're going to bed? Or would it. You could have enough covers in the space heater that you'd be all right.

[Aaron Weber]

You close the hatch, you put.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You.

[Aaron Weber]

Well the. The table folds down into a bed. You take the. You take it up and then you pull out a smaller piece of pipe.

[Dusty Slay]

That may be the saddest thing. You bomb at the open mic. You walk past the baby come bad guy and then you take your table.

[Aaron Weber]

Apart to make a. I'm telling you.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You eat, you eat. I'm trying to think one of their best. You go to. What's their gas. Their gas station.

[Aaron Weber]

Tim Hortons.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, you go, you come back. Yeah, you eat. Tim Hortons.

[Dusty Slay]

Got throw it away.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Debate. Do I just sleep on the table? Do I turn it into the bed? And then you get into the bed. How much would you just leave it to the bed?

[Aaron Weber]

I would just like. I was also. I was. I was boozing these days, so a lot of times I would just come home and be. I fell asleep outside the boat once and got sunburnt real bad. And that's when I was like just on the dock. Just on. No, no, no. So like you got the outer boat and then you go into the hatch to your layer or whatever.

[Dusty Slay]

It probably seemed cool though, when you fell asleep out there. You go, this is cool, man.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I'm living life, man.

[Aaron Weber]

I was fully diluting myself. I would wake up and be like, it's crazy that I'm just this free. Like as if I had like a wife and kids. I had fled or something.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I really free right now.

[Aaron Weber]

I needed that delusion though, cuz people.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Just walking by and just going, look at this. People saw you.

[Connor Larson]

Were you working a job?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Woke up to people seeing you.

[Aaron Weber]

I was working two days a week at a kickboxing gym, but I did boxing in college. I Had never kickboxed. And the kicking really adds another layer. The first day, a guy launched a head kick at my head, and I, like, barely got out of the way, and I was like, I should work at Tim Hortons.

[Connor Larson]

And you worked there. What were you doing?

[Aaron Weber]

I was off the books working as, like, a pads, because I had. I could do the pads for people.

[Connor Larson]

But just none of the kicking, not the main thing.

[Aaron Weber]

I kind of just would, like, riff. When they talked about the kicking, I'd go, it's not the kick you practice once. It's the kick you practice a thousand. Like, just. I would just say, whatever. And then they'd be like, huh?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But why didn't you just go to boxing gym?

[Aaron Weber]

Because I couldn't legally work anywhere.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I know. Well, but still.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, because you needed to work. Whatever.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Call it a visa.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I was very much.

[Dusty Slay]

This is not making the FSU education look good.

[Aaron Weber]

No. Well, wait. I mean, that's not. That's not me doing that. What am I tarnishing a brand?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Guys. Bert, Main guy scholar.

So it's. But, like, I mean, what. I know. You couldn't work on a table. Did you go to a box? Did you first try to go boxing?

[Aaron Weber]

No, my. My comic hooked me up with it very quickly. And then once he did that, I was like, this is it. I'm locked in. And I. You know, I was looking back, there were a million things where I should have gone, let's try one more time before we just settle into this routine. But I was so, like, yeah, confused that I would just go, they're giving me some money. I'm going to do it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And did you box in, like. Like, you really box for FSU or you did box?

[Aaron Weber]

So Florida State had, like, a deal where they said, we'll let you put Florida State on your shirt. You register as a club for, like, 50 bucks. But there was a professor who had a. He was like, a legit. He was a pro sparring partner. He started a gym, and it was like, this awesome industrial building. And he was, like, a legit guy who started, like, a free thing. So we'd go, like, to Gainesville and box their club team.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

And then we had one guy who was. He went pro. His name was Willie Farrell, which is like. I go, you know, your name is Will Ferrell. He had been an LSU linebacker record recruit, and he was accidentally concussing people all the time. Like, he was the nicest guy, and he would just very lightly tap you, and you'd be like, my life Is different now. Like, it was incredible how strong he was.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Did you spar with him? I sparred with him because they were like, well, you're tall. I go, well, there's more at play here. Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Did you learn how to box? Is this. Or did you know how to box?

[Aaron Weber]

Growing up, I didn't know how to do anything, and that's why I was like, I should learn how, because I feel. I also, you know, I think if, you know, you don't know how to fight, you're like, that's. That's the worst scenario you want to be. Like. Once I realized how many guys could beat me up via boxing, I was like, I'll chill out a lot. It was very helpful for me in that way.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Once everybody's into mma, you're like, I can't really just fight out here anymore.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, there's guys that'll really hurt you.

[Aaron Weber]

And it's not like. Like, even the amateur matches we'd have where you'd win, you'd be like, I'm in a lot of pain. Like, it wasn't. It was never fun. Or, like.

[Dusty Slay]

My buddy joined a gym, a boxing gym, for exercise, and he said one day, like, the coach came in and was like, yeah, this one guy died. He got. He started getting a lot of headaches, and then he died. And my buddy's like, I've been getting headaches. And then he.

[Aaron Weber]

I so.

[Dusty Slay]

And then he quit.

[Aaron Weber]

I got concussed. The reason I quit, I got concussed three times in nine months, which is more than they tell you to do. And the one time I got concussed, I. I had asked a girl out in my class to go on a date date, and I still went. So I got concussed at, like, 4, and I went at, like, 6. And I was asking her, like, where'd we meet? Like, I was really not doing a good job.

[Dusty Slay]

But she boxed, so she got it.

[Aaron Weber]

No, she didn't box. She just went to school.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, okay.

[Aaron Weber]

I need my English class.

She was very nice, though.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

She.

[Aaron Weber]

She was like, I'm gonna drive you home. Like, not in any romantic way. I just don't think you should drive. And I go, all right.

[Dusty Slay]

You're like, but I live on a boat. I'd rather not.

[Aaron Weber]

I didn't live on the boat yet. I was like, okay. She was in a whole new guy.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Did you go to the hospital? You just slept off?

[Aaron Weber]

No, I just slept it off because that's what, like, all the. All the guys on the team were like, yeah, you just like, don't fall asleep, but if you do, it's fine.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, that's who you ask the team.

[Aaron Weber]

I was very impressionable.

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[Connor Larson]

You can hear my daughter.

[Guest Advertiser]

She's getting excited about it too.

[Dusty Slay]

I got one. Have you ever been on a boat and immediately regretted getting on?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think so. I think almost all of them.

[Aaron Weber]

Do I got to answer this?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Should I say nothing?

[Dusty Slay]

See, that's how I am. I'm a little bit of a control freak in that way. And like the moment I'm on a boat, I'm like, ah, now the guy driving is in charge of my life.

[Connor Larson]

Yep.

[Dusty Slay]

For the rest of the day.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, I'm. Yeah. I think once you get on, you're like, God, I should have done this.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And you. And then because you can't, you just your control, it's all gone. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Big cruise coming up, by the way.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, we do have a big cruise coming up.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, that's true. Well, I'm not.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But that's a bigger boat.

[Dusty Slay]

Bigger boat. A little more room.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

More room. You got your. You got your place to go to.

[Dusty Slay]

You're not just trapped with one guy listening to his story.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

We'll be busy. You have a lot of shows. You have stuff to do.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, boat guys do have some long stories.

[Dusty Slay]

That's telling you things.

Okay. Yeah, I mean, I got, you know, I don't normally do the questions on the podcast, but. Do you get sick or are you lying like the rest of us? These are great. These are great questions. Very good. I'm not making a joke about you. These are good. I don't think I get seasick.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think you try to blend the questions in. Not so point blank.

[Dusty Slay]

That's a good. That's a good advice. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Turn to guest.

[Aaron Weber]

Guest. How do you feel about it?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So it says you lived on a boat. Oh, we already did that one.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. I mean, we used to. My dad would sail to Mexico.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Let me see.

[Aaron Weber]

From Florida in the 70s or 80s.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, he would sail to Mexico from Florida.

[Aaron Weber]

There's a photo of him. There's like a boat at a crazy angle, you know? Cause they're going fast and it's him on the boat. And he never. We had a photo of it in our bathroom, and he never told me until it was like 20. He goes, oh, yeah, I'm on that. I go, well, then I like it a lot more than I. I just thought it was a thing.

[Connor Larson]

Random boat.

[Dusty Slay]

You guys ever scared ski?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I've never skied on the. No, I've done the water ski.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Oh, water ski. Like, I've tried wakeboarding. Anything.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I tried to wakeboarding.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I. I tried and ruined all my friend's day for about an hour.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Kevin. Kevin James has an unbelievable.

[Connor Larson]

Such a funny bit.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Bit.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And it's like, the first time, it's on his sweat.

[Connor Larson]

The small. Sweat.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Small stuff. Unbelievable special. One of the best. And then it was. If you haven't. Well, you really should go watch. It's so funny of a special. And he. But he talks about that going on. Going to skiing for the first time and. And it was so funny because the. When I first watched that special that weekend, like a day or two before, I did exactly what he was saying.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, really?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Where it's like your first time, you're going on a boat, and then you're just like, you don't know what to do or, you know the bill.

[Connor Larson]

And you hear your. Hear your friends, and you're skiing.

[Dusty Slay]

He's down again.

[Connor Larson]

I didn't invite him.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You invite and you're on. Yeah. They talk you into it. You don't really want to be doing it, but you go, all right. You're waving them through. Yeah. And then every the second they get going, it's like you just hear them go.

Stops. And they got a circle. They got a circle and drag.

[Connor Larson]

Talk about when you're just waiting for the boat to come back around.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You're just floating around, dude. I was like. Like, I remember I crying because I just. It was like. I just. I think it helped me even to try to. When you try to write jokes and be relatable, it was like, that's what you wanted it to be. Because that laugh is like. There's not a laugh you cannot get. That laugh's the best. It's, like, the most. You feel, like, better. Yeah. Like. Because you're just like, the release when you're like, dude, I can't. That. I just went through this whole thing. It's so funny.

[Aaron Weber]

Is that the special with the mother dolphins?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Is that the same one?

[Connor Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I think it really only has the one, right? He has the one.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No, he's had some other ones come out lately, but that one was classic one.

[Dusty Slay]

I remember that.

[Connor Larson]

Transformative for me.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It was a big. It's a big special.

[Aaron Weber]

It would be on Comedy Central when I was a kid, and I'd be like, this is crazy.

[Connor Larson]

Something about the mini muffin. He's, like, taking an aspirin.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

I think I got a blueberry in that one.

[Aaron Weber]

In Florida, everybody would tube and tubing is like, you don't have to do tubing. None of the skill of. You can't throw people off.

[Connor Larson]

You just have to hang on.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, but that was kind of the fun is trying to throw people off. Like, really cut in a corner.

[Dusty Slay]

And then they go, yeah, here's some boat stuff. Mayday.

[Connor Larson]

Good segment.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He goes, people don't even. People listening going, I guess Dusty got rid of that paper because he's just off the dome. He's just off the dome right now.

Or you're asking for a mayday.

[Dusty Slay]

Mayday comes from the French mater, meaning help me.

[Aaron Weber]

I think that's how you say it, too, mater. I think Dusty said it in French perfectly.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

All the, you know, like, loose cannon, groggy. What are the. A bunch of them are all, like, nautical words.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. They're like, I see a fun fact thing here. And it says, the longest river in the world is still debated now versus Amazon. How. Like, how is that still. How can it be dependent.

[Aaron Weber]

I bet I know the sides. I bet I know where each group is that defends it. You know what I mean? I bet the guys in Egypt are Saying Nile and the guys in Brazil are going Amazon.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But why do they. How is it. How could it even be right?

[Dusty Slay]

It's like, just measure it. Just measure and let's just go ahead and figure that out.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I think it's where it starts. Right. Because they all start in mountains and then they run down. So you gotta be like, where do you. Right now, China has a river that eventually becomes India's biggest river. River. And China's like, building a dam there. And India's kind of like. I don't know if you're. That's kind of our river, too. It's like, interesting. Who's got what river?

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Why do you know this?

[Aaron Weber]

I'm a big river guy most of my set. If you see my new hour.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So you're not boat. Open boats.

[Aaron Weber]

I did boats.

[Connor Larson]

Really?

[Dusty Slay]

A water guy?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Water guy.

[Aaron Weber]

Well, most of my fans are nautical fans, and I don't want to. Nautical.

[Dusty Slay]

Some Blakes have their own laws separate from state boating rules. Rolls.

[Aaron Weber]

Oh, not the one I love.

[Connor Larson]

It's a private scene.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Open water, the movie.

[Connor Larson]

Not in a long, long time.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Dusty Slay]

Didn't you do a casino where you said this was, like, in Indiana?

[Aaron Weber]

I did a casino in Indiana and there was some, like, bizarre rule. It had to be a riverboat casino because you got the Mississippi right, like, going up. So they had just like, essentially dug a big ditch around a building and went. See, it didn't connect to any other body of water.

[Connor Larson]

It said a moat.

[Aaron Weber]

And they. And they called it, like, riverboat casino. And I remember the guy I was with had done the Tonight show, and we were in a ballroom, and the lady running it comes out. She's no mic. She goes, weren't you on the Tonight Show? He's, like, waiting to go up. And he goes, yes. And she goes, okay, that's enough out of you. And then I just remember him being furious the whole gig. And then I had no mic and bombed for 20 minutes.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow. He just said, yes.

[Aaron Weber]

And she said, that's enough out of you in front of the whole. All 20 of the audience.

[Connor Larson]

Have we talked about Boatman on here before?

[Dusty Slay]

No, I don't think so.

[Connor Larson]

Boatman. I did a show. Where was it? Michigan. It was in open for Dusty at a bar.

[Dusty Slay]

It was on a lake on Lake Michigan, but a bit north. Pentwater, maybe. Pentwater, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And the host of the show was a radio personality named Boatman RIP by the way. Oh, he did pass away.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. So.

I heard the conversation. He Talks to Dusty. He goes, I'm bringing you on some stage. Do you want me to say? He goes, well, you can say, you know, from Nashville. I was on tmz. I was on last. Last comic standing.

[Dusty Slay]

I got interviewed outside of Zany's one time on tmz and I was milking it as a credit.

[Connor Larson]

This was. That's how long ago this was. And then Jimmy Kimmel Live was your. You just done Jimmy Kimmel Live? Yeah, it's before you did the Tonight Show. And Boatman gets up there, no material, and he goes, all right, your headliner.

And you guys watch tmz.

He does this. Everyone's like, no, it's a bar in, like, rural Michigan. Everyone's like, no. And he goes, yep. All right.

Jimmy Kimmel Live. Anybody watch Jimmy Kimmel Live?

He just keeps doing it. And then he goes about the show. Nashville. Anybody watch Nashville? A couple people. And he's like, well, he wasn't on that. Where he lives.

Please welcome. I had the video of this. I edited this for you at one point because it was so funny. Please welcome to the stage Dusty Slay.

[Aaron Weber]

Just.

[Connor Larson]

Dusty goes up. Keep it going for Boatman.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Gonna ride this energy. I'd never seen that before.

[Aaron Weber]

Such a intro.

[Dusty Slay]

The show was actually okay. Pretty fun show, but it was. Yeah, he was so bad.

[Aaron Weber]

You guys brought me to. I've done Egg harbor with both of you with Wisconsin. And I went back to go do it just via. Like, I just booked it via email. And they asked me before the show. I'm featuring. They go, do you have any credits you want to say? And I go, no, it's fine. Just bring me up. And the guy goes up and he goes, we were supposed to have. I was a fill in. He goes, we were supposed to have. And then he read that guy's credits. And then he goes, but now we have Connor Larson. I go, what if you had told me we were doing that?

[Connor Larson]

Think about how good the show could have been. The show was about to be great.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Is they probably don't know they're supposed to have either. Yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah, it's not like we're supposed to have. They name a name. Everybody's like, what?

[Connor Larson]

All right, yeah, we're just here.

[Aaron Weber]

I could. I could have competed with that. I didn't know we were doing this.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, we're just. Yeah, it's like we're just old people in this room. Like, me and Aaron did it. I hated that gig so bad. I got. I got the show. Ended. I got off stage. As I was walking out, the guy handed me my check. We beat the people.

[Aaron Weber]

We beat everybody out.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean like we were all walking out together.

[Connor Larson]

Dusty gets to the his merch pitch and he picks up his T shirt and he goes, nah.

It just does his clothes.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Did you have to. Oh, oh yeah.

[Connor Larson]

He was like, I don't want to stick around.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, like he was going to pit.

[Connor Larson]

He was about to do. He picks up the shirt now puts.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It back, puts it down. So you just left with his shirt. You went up with a shirt and just left with the shirt. No mention of the shirt. Why do you bring the shirt up? Cuz Aaron, imagine when that joke would have been.

[Dusty Slay]

Aaron was actually having a really good set. And I thought, this is going to be great.

[Connor Larson]

You know, I remember about that. That weekend was I brought, I had two left shoes the whole weekend.

[Aaron Weber]

I remember, go on.

[Connor Larson]

I forgot, I forgot a belt and I. And I had two of the same pairs of shoes and I grabbed two left shoes and I had that all weekend and I was so uncomfortable.

[Dusty Slay]

We hiked a little bit down at Eggon Opportunity. We didn't hike, we walked around the.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Woods a little bit. Should I go buy another shoe?

[Connor Larson]

At the time I was like, no. I, you know what I did do was I ordered a belt. Tell you the belt was the priority at that point.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Over the shoes.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So you.

So you're at a point in your life where you're, why you go, look, you can get a belt or you can get the right shoe. And you thought, and a belt.

[Connor Larson]

I thought for everybody's benefit, let me go ahead and get a belt.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

The shoes, the least of the selfless, that is.

[Aaron Weber]

Thanks, man.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And maybe because if you're at a place where you need a belt that bad, you can make a left shoe, a right shoe. You know what I mean?

[Dusty Slay]

You just, he's like, no, I can break it in, I'll break it in.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

There is no left or right shoe at that point. It's just a shoe.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It'S like those wooden shoes.

[Aaron Weber]

I don't think they're, I don't think.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

They'Re left and right. I think they're just a shoe.

[Aaron Weber]

Left shoe's an opinion. I'll make the shoe what I want.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. Good times.

[Aaron Weber]

All right, man.

[Connor Larson]

I never saw this movie. So what's the plot of it? They get, I mean, I vaguely remember watching this. They're out in the water, they get left out.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And so they get, you know, they're on like a trip and then, you know, like, scuba diving, and then they come up and the boat's gone.

[Connor Larson]

Blair Witch Meets.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Have we. That's what we'll watch. Have you watched this? Oh, have you watched it? It's.

[Connor Larson]

You're seeing Shawshank Redemption.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No. Yeah, me neither.

[Aaron Weber]

This is like that. But, you know.

[Connor Larson]

You know, if you watched it with them and not me, that would hurt my feelings.

Go watch it this weekend.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You throw a golf ball to the fence without me. That's how you. That's what you would do back at me.

[Connor Larson]

I would do that immediately.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And I would be so mad that.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't get that reference, I guess, but.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, you were here for all of it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But yeah.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

In the. Your body was. I guess. Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

We do a podcast, and.

I've never watched sh. I've never seen Shang.

[Dusty Slay]

I know that.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And then he says he can throw a golf ball.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay, okay.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But we've said. We both said that we. I would be mad. He can't do it without me being there. I did. If I went and watched this movie, he'd immediately go, yeah, at a small field where it hits the fence.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And he told you. I do that.

[Aaron Weber]

I remember.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I wish we could watch it. Could we do, like. Could you do Shaw Shank? You know, like, where they film you?

[Dusty Slay]

What's that, like a react. Like Mystery Science Theater 3000?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, why not?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But can you put that on YouTube?

[Connor Larson]

No, you'd have to figure out how to.

[Dusty Slay]

I think if you talk throughout, as long as you're interrupting it enough, I think it could go.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Is that a movie to do that too, or is it not?

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know.

[Connor Larson]

I don't know. There's not a lot of stuff on this.

[Aaron Weber]

Tough scenes to narrate.

[Connor Larson]

We're gonna fast forward past these shower scenes real quick.

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, it is a prison movie.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, it's a prison. It's a prison movie. And prison's not good for a lot. The main character has a tough time.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What's gonna happen when I watch this? Like, is it, like, what I. I feel like it's gonna be?

[Connor Larson]

I feel like it's gonna reinvigorate your human spirit.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

You know what I mean?

[Dusty Slay]

It is good. I mean, I know that vinegar.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I did say that.

[Aaron Weber]

Weird.

[Connor Larson]

Reinvigor.

[Guest Advertiser]

Reinvigorate.

[Dusty Slay]

You guys ever been on a pontoon boat?

[Connor Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I love a pontoon. That's the only kind of boat I really like.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Why is that?

[Dusty Slay]

Well. Well, obviously I've not spent a lot of time on yachts, so I guess that could change it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yacht is crazy.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I've never been. I don't.

[Dusty Slay]

I've never been on a yacht, but of regular.

[Connor Larson]

Did that big. That thing for.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, that. There's a cruise ship.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, okay.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

Of regular people. Boats. I like a pontoon boat. I had a buddy that had, like, a speedboat one time, and he would take me out on it, and it was. That was one of those where I was like, this is fun for a minute, but now we're like, we're out here.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't want.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You see all those, like, you know, like, those famous. Everybody's famous. Like, going to do the yacht thing in, like, France or something. Something. Right, Whatever, you know? I bet that's crazy. Yeah. You don't think so?

[Connor Larson]

I bet it's cool. I'm just basing it off the show Entourage where it looks like.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah, that can.

[Connor Larson]

You know what I mean?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah. No, but I said, I bet it's awesome. I feel like. I think you.

[Connor Larson]

I said, yeah, I don't have a ton. I'm just basing it off the show. It looks like that's.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That's kind of all I'm basing.

[Connor Larson]

Okay. All right, then. It is.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You just see it in, like.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

TMZ or something like that.

[Dusty Slay]

But I just think, like, where they go.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Maybe they go to can. Yeah, maybe it is that.

[Dusty Slay]

Like, what are you doing out there? Once you're out there on the boat, that makes it fun.

[Connor Larson]

Whatever you want, dude.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think it's. I bet it's, like, quiet, and then I bet, you know, you got a lot of stuff.

[Connor Larson]

You know, it's quiet or not quiet.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You can have, like, a big party out there, and it basically just like.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You know, it's like a big house.

[Dusty Slay]

I guess I'm saying, if you're married and sober, what are you doing out there? Fishing?

[Connor Larson]

You're asking, what would you do out there?

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think you're swimming. You're jumping off of it.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay.

[Connor Larson]

Like, you know, fine dining.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You're. You're snacking. You're taking in the view. You're going. You're. You're going to like this part. You're, like today.

[Aaron Weber]

For some reason, calling it snacking, not eating.

[Connor Larson]

They got almonds, and you guys got cheeses.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

They got cheeses. I think they. They. And they probably made the cheese. Probably from the cheese it got.

[Aaron Weber]

Right.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think you go and up to, like, near a cliff and you go jump and Y' all snorkel through there and you spend your day snorkeling.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Water ski, jet ski, you can do.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

All that and then, you know, like have a good big dinner and then you have, you know.

[Dusty Slay]

That's true.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

All that stuff.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I guess if you have the whole thing, you have like a crew that's cooking you some meals.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, I think that's all baked in. It's all baked in.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Yeah, it's all in the price.

[Aaron Weber]

By the time you're there at a yacht, like, life's pretty fun in general. I bet.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I mean, you're not having a lot of bad.

[Connor Larson]

Well, how long have boats been around? A long time.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, you know.

According to some research I've done, some people say that the earliest boats were dug out canoes over 10,000 years ago, but the canoes were already born. But I don't believe, you know, the earth is even that old. So, you know, that's tough.

[Connor Larson]

It's tough to square that.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. I would give it about 6,000 years. Okay, but what do you think?

[Connor Larson]

It was started with boats, but I.

[Dusty Slay]

Would think, yeah, a humans hollowed out logs before inventing the wheel.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Dugout boats are cool. Like when it's one tree, it's like a 60 foot thing. It's one piece of tree. Those are very cool. You can take. Take those like in the ocean. I mean, you should. I wouldn't do it.

[Dusty Slay]

The first guy that invented a boat. That guy's pretty cool. You gotta think, I bet, I bet.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

There'S no one first guy. I think it's like everybody kind of figured it out on their own.

[Dusty Slay]

What do you think they were doing? They were like, we would like to get over there and we're tired of swimming.

[Connor Larson]

I think you see a piece of wood floating and you're like, oh, oh.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I bet I can.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, that's true.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

And that maybe is why they invented that before the wheel. Do you think the wheel was an invented thing or you think they saw round logs rolled and they go, if we just cut this small.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, I bet it wasn't. I bet there's more people embarrassed how long it took them to figure out the wheel.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, my gosh.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Than it is the will. I think. I think there's tribes, if whatever you would call them back then that are like, it's shocking how much I go, we had. I knew a. I knew a family that had four wheels, but we just never thought about. I thought, well, they're rich.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

If you met a different Group and they had come up with the wheel and you hadn't. You would be like, oh, don't tell them.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't even.

[Connor Larson]

I don't even want to show you my hut.

[Aaron Weber]

Just. Just curious. What do you call it?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, you would call it. I bet you would. Absolutely. Go. You got wheels? Yeah, yeah, we got wheels. We got wheels. We got wheels. You know, I ride this for fun because it's more exercise.

[Guest Advertiser]

You got.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You're riding on a square, a triangle bike, and you go, this is just what we do for fun. He goes, we got all. We've had will so long that we do this sometimes as exercise because you're so embarrassed to go. And then you just go back to your. And you go, idiots.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It's a circle, and it's so much easier. I bet that's. I bet that's hard.

[Dusty Slay]

The wheels are out of town right now. They took a trip.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, it would be hard if you came up with the wheel to, like, sell people on it. You go, it's just. It's like this. It's like this. Yeah. And it's just. It's waste.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No, but you got to show it to.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, you would have to have a long.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Seeing is believing.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But, yeah, I mean, that is very fun. Funny to just be. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I think I like boats. I think boats are cool. I don't like being on them.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But.

[Dusty Slay]

Listen, listen.

[Connor Larson]

I was watching you flip through it, try to find.

[Dusty Slay]

Brian's had hundreds of episodes to perfect this.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Okay.

[Dusty Slay]

This is my first try.

[Connor Larson]

And you didn't know you were doing it right before.

[Dusty Slay]

And I didn't do the notes. And as I'm looking through this, you know, in the beginning of the podcast, I didn't like boats, but as I'm looking through this, I go, you know what? Like, I do look back, I do like boats.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Is it like, what boat you said, would you.

Speedboat? What kind of boat would you buy? If you could buy any boat, yacht, anything.

[Connor Larson]

I think like a pontoon boat, like Dusty said, you can just take the family out and sit.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But if you could afford a yacht.

[Dusty Slay]

If you could buy.

[Connor Larson]

I have no interest in the yacht. You know, they say, I want to look. If you have a yacht, I want to come hang out on, but what have you, I'll let you do it. Deal with it.

[Dusty Slay]

They said the two best days of a boat owner's life is when they buy it and when they sell it. Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

They all.

[Aaron Weber]

Everyone at the marina would be like, you don't want to be the Guy with the boat. You want to be the friend of the guy. Right? Because it is. It is a lot. I mean, expensive, right?

[Connor Larson]

You know what they say? You know what boat stands for? Bust out another thousand. That's what they say.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Who says that?

[Connor Larson]

I saw it on the show.

[Aaron Weber]

Boatman. Who said that? Boatman said that?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Was that boatman?

Is that how he got off stage?

[Aaron Weber]

That was his merch pitch?

[Connor Larson]

I would say Pawn Stars. I saw that. And they were trying to sell a boat.

[Aaron Weber]

What about a houseboat? You don't have any interest in that because that's sort of a pontoon boat taken to the extreme.

[Dusty Slay]

I like a houseboat.

[Connor Larson]

Houseboat's nice.

[Dusty Slay]

I want a little rigged up houseboat where it's like a trailer on a boat.

[Aaron Weber]

There's a lot. Yeah, you can get that. They got a bunch of those in Toronto. House boats that are like. Something goes wrong, you just untie that rope and you go, I'm moving.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Like a single wide trailer, though, sitting on top of a flat. So it looks like you're in a trailer park, but you're like, floating on a boat.

[Aaron Weber]

The trailer park aesthetic. But on the water.

[Connor Larson]

I'll tell you this, as much as these all sound fun, the least fun I've ever had in my life was in a kayak. That is the least fun I can have on earth. Yeah, I. It's just not. I'm miserable.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Where you get going?

[Connor Larson]

Oh, I don't get going. That's the thing.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No, I'm saying you get going sideways.

[Connor Larson]

I've had that before. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Were you with someone else?

[Connor Larson]

I've done it alone. I've done it with other people, and it's just.

[Dusty Slay]

When was it least fun?

[Connor Larson]

I feel like. With other people.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And I feel like it's so much work, and I feel like nobody's talking about. How much work.

[Dusty Slay]

Is that a kayak or a canoe? Are those.

[Connor Larson]

Basically, I think I'm group them in. I'm grouping in where you have the paddle, and everyone's like, let's just a fun day. Let's go have a fun day. And.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, no, you need a lazy river on a float. Like, a float trip can be fun.

[Connor Larson]

Oh, that would be great. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I've only did float trips while I was drinking, though. I haven't done it in a long time. But, you know, if you're having, you know, if you're, you know, you're doing some light drinking, floating down the river, that's fun.

[Aaron Weber]

You gotta go in a ginger beer.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You want to go with the, with other people?

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I took my wife kayaking and there's like a. I was like, well, I'll paddle because. And then I, I, we got like 100ft out and I go, we should brought two paddles. This is, we're on a lot slower. She's not having as much fun. If I had just given her a paddle, this would have been better.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, you said you should have what?

[Aaron Weber]

I should have given her a paddle as well. I was like, she'll just sit back and enjoy the view. But then we were going slow and I go, she would have not.

[Connor Larson]

It looks like it's going to be so easy to.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

She has nothing to do.

[Aaron Weber]

No. Well, she just can think about. She goes, this is slower than I thought. Yeah, it's kind of all she thought.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I thought I married a man.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

What happened to this? I thought he was a boat guy.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think we're going upstream, hun.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, what about jet skis? You guys get into that at all?

[Connor Larson]

I love a jet ski, dude.

[Dusty Slay]

I never jet ski now jet ski.

[Connor Larson]

The opposite of a kayak. Probably the most fun I've ever had.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh really?

[Connor Larson]

They are so much fun.

[Dusty Slay]

I never jet skied. I was four wheelers.

[Connor Larson]

I love.

[Dusty Slay]

I even did a snow snowmobile one time. But never a ski. Jet ski, no.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. Dude, that's amazing.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I would see.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, it's all Kenny Powers that he's taken over the jet ski thing. Oh, you typed in eastbound. I thought that was me too. Jet ski on Google Image I went, wow, that shows more popular.

[Connor Larson]

It is so much fun.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

But the jet ski people I grew up on like near the beach, you know, Sarasota, Florida. And the jet ski that if you're, if there's gonna be a problem at the beach, it's probably.

[Connor Larson]

Is that a type of guy?

[Aaron Weber]

100% jet ski.

[Dusty Slay]

Someone said this type of guy.

[Aaron Weber]

Somebody had a joke when I first started. They said like a jet ski is a, is a, it's a like the, if the soul patch. If a soul patch was a vehicle, like, you know what I mean? It's a very specific type of guy. And my dad would get furious at jet skis based on nothing. Like they would just go by and he'd be like, I knew it.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, it's also like if you love like peace and quiet and you're out on the beach and then, and then like they're ripping it up out there and having a lot of fun. Like you ever see people having fun in Public. And it just annoy me. You go, what do you guys doing? What are you doing? I was in New York City and I walked by these people. They were on the. They were in. In Times Square. They were on this little pedestal where that thing goes, the camera goes around them, and they're filming some video and they're having the time of their life. And I'm like, what a bunch of losers. You know what I mean?

[Aaron Weber]

I would love to see you see a flash mob, like, right as it starts, you're like trying to do something on your phone, and then it just.

[Dusty Slay]

Starts and you're like, yeah, J. Jesus. Right?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Right.

[Dusty Slay]

Absolutely.

[Guest Advertiser]

This episode is sponsored by Better Help. The holidays are a time of traditions. Some people have many in their family, and some have none. Or they're just beginning their own. My favorite family tradition is decorating our Christmas tree with our daughter. But we all need to incorporate traditions in our life. Incorporating therapy into your new or existing traditions can help ensure you take care of yourself during what can be a very joyful but sometimes hectic and lonely time of year. It's so important this time of year to take care of yourself, which could be stressful and lonely for many. I encourage you this year to try BetterHelp online therapy in December to close the year with clarity rather than chaos. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of5.5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million client reviews. So this December, start a new tradition. Take care of yourself. Our listeners get 10% [e-mail] Nate that's better. H E L P.com Nate is there.

[Dusty Slay]

Any additional things you'd like to say about boats?

Your most fun time was ever was on a jet ski.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think this visited. U.S. coast Guard estimates 95% of boating accidents are caused by human error. Not water. Not the water. Which I think it's funny. I don't know. It's just funny to go like, so 5%. I go, it was.

[Connor Larson]

The water snuck up on me.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It's just kind of funny to be like, the waters. It is. Because that's all else it could be.

[Dusty Slay]

That's like water. That's like comedy. 90. 95's the comic. There's a 5% where you can blame the water. Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yes. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

That is. I'll give it. I'll give it 10.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I don't think it's 10.

[Connor Larson]

10%.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I don't.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I. I mean, when you're. Here's the. Here's the blur. Because when you're first starting, you're not good. So it's a. You're. You're. It's two not goods in front of each other. You're not in a good venue in front of a bad audience.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Neither one of them are good.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But as you get. As you get more professional and you're doing more professional gigs and not the. Then it's like it starts. The crowd knows they're at least. Even if they don't know you, they know they're in a comedy club and they're here to watch whatever they're going to go watch.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And I. So I think it's I. And I think the other 5% you're talking about, I think that's the comic that's egging that on because you learn quickly. If you start talking to that crowd.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Then you open that door. Well, then whose fault if that crowd's bad? It's like, even if you didn't mean for it, it's like you just. You kind of asked for it.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. Well, sometimes.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm just thinking, sometimes the water's rough, though.

[Connor Larson]

Sometimes you walk in and you go, this is. It's an impossible setup.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. I'm talking, like, know that. Well, yes.

[Connor Larson]

If it's noon in Texas last week and I'm the com.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Weirdly enough. I don't know. All right, maybe I could say that. Not being the crowd, that's just this.

[Connor Larson]

It's just the setup. Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It's like you're just in a position that's not going to be good. I've done corporates where. Yeah. They have at 3000 people, and the. The speakers are up to about 500 people, and then 2500. Can't hear what I'm saying. So it's just like they just start talking.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Well, that's just a bad setup. So it's like not a crowd. I think, in general, like, of what that is. It's. Yeah, 5% is. But I've seen some setups. I've seen. I've started. I mean, I remember going in and doing shows when you first start, and you're just like. You're like, I would. I could point and go, that guy's getting kicked out.

[Connor Larson]

You can tell right away.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Show hasn't even started.

[Dusty Slay]

He's on a jet ski.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

He's going to get kicked out.

[Dusty Slay]

Do you have a favorite song about boats that you like?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No.

[Connor Larson]

Wreck of the Fitzgerald.

[Dusty Slay]

That's a good one.

[Connor Larson]

It's got to be up there.

[Aaron Weber]

When I think of boats, I think of Steely Dan. That's boat music to me. I don't know if they're all about rock.

Yeah, that's exactly.

[Connor Larson]

I don't know, like a story about a boat. I don't know.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, Fitzgerald's a good one. L. Lovett has one called if I Had a Boat.

[Aaron Weber]

That's a good song.

[Connor Larson]

That's a good. Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

What about it could buy me a boat. I don't know who sings that? It's a pretty recent. Yeah, that's not a bad song.

[Connor Larson]

Opera. Remember Chris Jensen?

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

It could buy me a Boat.

[Dusty Slay]

It's not a great song, but it's.

[Aaron Weber]

Not a bad song.

[Connor Larson]

It could buy me a truck to pull it.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. I had a list, but I left my phone in another room.

[Aaron Weber]

You had a list of boat songs?

[Dusty Slay]

Top five country songs about boats.

[Aaron Weber]

Maybe it's on here.

[Connor Larson]

That song. That song is so funny. The lyrics are. People say money can't buy happiness. This dude. All right, I get it. You know what it can buy. It could buy me a boat.

[Dusty Slay]

Yep.

[Connor Larson]

It could buy me a truck to pull it.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

It could buy me a yeti cooler. Ice down with some silver bullets. Yeah, that's it.

[Dusty Slay]

And as long as that's not on the way to a canoeing trip. That's happiness.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

I mean, that does sound fun.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What about the. What is it? It's not a canoe. The. Is it a kayak? Or is it when you're. You're like, in the thing.

[Connor Larson]

Vacuum sealed kayak.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, that's.

[Connor Larson]

That's like.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, that's people. You can drown.

[Connor Larson]

I've done that.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Drown up.

[Aaron Weber]

That's what we grew up. I mean, when I was a little kid, that's what my dad, like, he'd send us out in those. And.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You can flip them. Really?

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And how do you get back over? You just.

[Aaron Weber]

You just.

[Connor Larson]

They're designed that they. Can.

[Aaron Weber]

You put yourself back in it. Like it.

[Dusty Slay]

I.

[Aaron Weber]

You do get used to it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, you get. You can get out of it.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You're not.

[Aaron Weber]

You don't have, like, clamps or anything. You're just. You got your feet in there. There are like the. The professional ones, like the guys who go over waterfalls. They're, like, locked in there. And those guys are. Those guys are crazy. That's it.

[Connor Larson]

I was in one that would. Was, like, sealed.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, you shouldn't have been in that.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

I should not have been.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

I got some questions.

[Connor Larson]

It was a little. It was a rubber suit. It was around my neck.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It was a regular one.

[Connor Larson]

It was everybody, but mine was more. And then I remember it went up to the neck, and it was like strangling me.

[Dusty Slay]

Somebody was trying to kill you, bro.

[Connor Larson]

It was really cold water, so they're like. You have to cover your whole body or else you'll get.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But does it have arm things? Yeah, that came out.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. It wasn't a straight jacket.

[Aaron Weber]

Who told you this? Was there a note on the guy?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You were. You're floating. It looks. You're like a lighthouse just going down to. Just a light on your head. Just.

[Dusty Slay]

This is the least fun I've ever had.

[Connor Larson]

This is a real thing.

[Aaron Weber]

That's terrible.

[Connor Larson]

I had an ore and everything. It was just like.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But you had it. So it came up and you put it through your arms and like, a jacket, and it came all the way up to your neck. And that was attached to the boat.

[Connor Larson]

It was like, to the. So, like, a wet suit that zips all the way up, and there's a thick turtleneck, and the whole body's covered. And then there's like, a little rubber sock that comes out of the kayak, and you get in that, and that just seals on you. So trying to create a seal so, like, the kayak doesn't fill with water.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But then if you fell over, could you swim out of it?

[Connor Larson]

Not easily, but they were designed that you could flip back up.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

If you, like, shifted your weight, you could flip the thing back up.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

What was the training course like on that?

[Connor Larson]

I mean, it was like 20 minutes of this guy talking.

[Aaron Weber]

Where were you? Seal school. Where were you doing? This is crazy.

[Connor Larson]

This was in Argentina. Argentina with Lucy's family.

[Aaron Weber]

Damn, that's cool.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

That's terrifying.

[Connor Larson]

I mean, it was beautiful, but it was.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And then I hate being the guy that's not having fun when everybody else is. But I was pretty uncomfortable.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And, no, I'm the biggest person in the country. So they got no. Like, they're like, what size wetsuit? I go, like, what, the biggest that you have available? And it was like, you know, a large.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I was like, golly, you got to take your shirt off in front of everybody.

[Connor Larson]

So I squeezed into it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Can I wear. Do you mind if I put my T shirt back on over the.

[Connor Larson]

I should have done.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You just got to get up. You're just walking with the boat around your waist.

[Connor Larson]

Just Picture.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

They just punch two holes through the boat, and now you're just walking through this town and they're just.

I.

There was one thing I was going to read on this, and I lost it.

[Guest Advertiser]

Mm.

[Aaron Weber]

Mm.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh. A boat technically becomes a ship when it can carry another boat. I didn't know that. I thought people would like to know.

[Dusty Slay]

I thought. I thought a tugboat pulled other boats.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, but that's so. Yeah, but I guess it can carry another boat.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, it's gotta be on top of it.

[Connor Larson]

So you lived in a ship?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No, his was on the backside.

[Dusty Slay]

Dinghy was on the boat.

[Aaron Weber]

No. And people. Boat people are very specific with the jargon. They'll yell at you a lot.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, the other one I was. It was the Polynesians navigated across the Pacifics. Polynesian. How do you say it?

[Connor Larson]

Polynesians.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Polynesians.

[Dusty Slay]

Like the sauce at Chick Fil A. Yeah, exactly.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I would call that Polynesian.

[Connor Larson]

I wonder if they're related.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Everything they did, they navigated across the Pacific.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And now they're.

[Dusty Slay]

Now they're whittled down to a sauce.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Polynesia. Am I not singer Polynesians?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, Polynesians.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Polynesians navigated across the Pacific using stars, wind, birds and waves.

[Connor Larson]

How did they use birds for navigation?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

No, I think they just say that.

[Dusty Slay]

I think.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I think they go, long story short, we didn't know what we were doing.

[Connor Larson]

We just went, can you imagine?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Some guys goes, there's that star again. And you're like, they know nothing about stuff.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

And then he goes, all right. He goes, stars there, that. Birds right there. We're going. We're going the right direction. I would find that if I was on that boat with them, I would go, like. I just don't. And they go, look at the wave patterns. And you go, what?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. What are you talking.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What are we doing?

[Connor Larson]

What are you talking?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What are we doing?

[Dusty Slay]

Like, look how that bird's fine. And then they go, what about this.

[Aaron Weber]

One the other way?

As long as you see.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Don't break up that one.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, that's the rule. If you see a bird, it's got to land something.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, we're close. Close?

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. You're close because, you know, comforting in the ocean when people go, we're close.

[Dusty Slay]

I also like that. It's like, well, how'd the other people do it? Everybody was doing it with the stars, wind, birds, and wave patterns. Like, the other people weren't like, I.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Think if you're doing it with the winds, too, you're going like, well, the wind's taking us this way.

[Connor Larson]

When does it say this happened?

[Dusty Slay]

It doesn't give any dates.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

1994.

They're bringing over that sauce from Chick Fil A so Night. Yeah. Maybe early 90s.

[Dusty Slay]

90S.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Wow. They don't say. But if the. The. When they're using star winning birds, you imagine it's zero.

[Aaron Weber]

I think they say it's a long time ago. That's why it's the big deal. Because they like, they think they got to like Indonesia and Australia.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

They don't say it's a long time ago. It look how they got over this. Senate says it's a long time ago. Are you looking for a year to wrap your head around? Who cares?

[Aaron Weber]

Well, but this is. The Amish are getting around like this on land.

[Dusty Slay]

The.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I don't even know how to say. When was this? The 1430s?

[Connor Larson]

I mean, maybe.

[Guest Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

But Christopher Columbus, he couldn't have been using much better than that.

[Connor Larson]

When was a compass invented?

[Aaron Weber]

I think he was. I think this is like thousands of years ago. Yeah, I think that's the. If you type it in, they're going.

[Connor Larson]

To be like, the compass was invented in China with versions appearing during the han dynasty, around 4th century BC.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

So they'd been using it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

So Polynesians weren't. They said, we're using birds.

[Aaron Weber]

They were the Amish of the sea. They said, we will not use your.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What are you. So the Amish used birds?

[Aaron Weber]

No, I'm just saying Amish are like new technology. We don't need it.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Okay.

[Aaron Weber]

Amish people might be using birds. They use birds to build houses and barns and navigate. Right now. Yeah, I think we're downtown. I see a bird.

[Dusty Slay]

Here's an old subject, but it says the deepest point in the ocean could fit Mount Everest inside. But they don't really know the deepest point of the ocean.

[Connor Larson]

We've been to the deepest point of the ocean.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't think so.

[Connor Larson]

Cameron went there on a. He tweeted from there.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't.

[Connor Larson]

James Cameron tweeted from there, dude.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, but there would be the deepest.

[Dusty Slay]

Point that we can go.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

That we know about.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, sure.

[Dusty Slay]

He's not. We not been to the deepest.

[Aaron Weber]

That's a crazy thing to do at the bottom of the ocean. Tweet. Yeah, I would have, like planted a flag. You know, he can't get out of the boat.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, he tweeted something. Just arrived at the ocean's deepest point. Hitting bottom never felt so good. Can't wait to share what I'm Seeing with you.

[Dusty Slay]

It's just not true, though. I don't believe it.

[Connor Larson]

You don't believe what, that he. He went down there?

[Dusty Slay]

That he tweeted from there?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I would believe that someone on the boat tweeted it once they hit.

[Connor Larson]

Okay.

[Dusty Slay]

I don't believe they did it, though. I don't believe they went to the bottom.

[Aaron Weber]

If they have cell service down there and there's like. There's like, motels I've been in that don't have it. I feel like their priorities.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You would think. You go, well, then, yeah, let us know what service. What are you. Goes. He goes, T. Mobile.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah. Also, you're at the bottom of the ocean. Get off your phone for a minute.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, yeah. Take it in.

[Dusty Slay]

What's it take to be impressed?

[Aaron Weber]

Would you guys ever get on a submarine? I would never.

[Guest Advertiser]

No.

[Connor Larson]

I have zero interest in that. I'd rather go on a rocket to the moon than a submarine. 10ft. Now, submarines, I'll go 10ft, but 10ft, you go.

[Dusty Slay]

I wouldn't even want to get in the submarine, to be honest with you, you guys.

[Connor Larson]

That's what I'm saying. I would. No space. That's small.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I've scuba dive.

[Aaron Weber]

Scuba diving is awesome.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, but it's the. Yeah, I would see. Yeah. Submarine would be. I mean, well, how do you not start paying?

[Aaron Weber]

I would.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I would have to have a lot of medication problems.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

And just looks like you did it.

[Dusty Slay]

Especially like the. The one in the. The one in Charleston for, like, the. It's like one of the first submarines to be used in battle. Like, everyone died every time they used it multiple times. And everyone that ever got in it in the water died, but the boat kept coming back. Yeah. Imagine like, being the third crew.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

You're like, everybody.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. How'd the boat come back?

[Dusty Slay]

I don't know.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

That's crazy.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

You don't be the first anything in exploration. You know what I mean? You want to be like the fifth.

[Dusty Slay]

The Hunley. So what it was called to Huntley.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, the Hunley.

[Aaron Weber]

You ever seen the free diving guys? The guys who can dive down to like 300ft, just hold. Holding their breath. That's insane, dude. Those are really. That's like a hobby where you go, how'd you get into this?

[Connor Larson]

We talked about this with Ben Sawyer.

[Dusty Slay]

Okay. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah. Talked about Civil War.

[Aaron Weber]

Civil War submarine is.

[Connor Larson]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

I know it's crazy, but it's like they died. Yeah. I mean, like, I don't know. They used to talk about it In Charleston.

I don't know. Everybody died though.

[Aaron Weber]

That's the point. Oh, yeah, I see. I see. All I can read from here is killing all eight of her second and crew.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Seems like a bad review.

[Connor Larson]

So, Mobile, Alabama.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

Anyway, I've been on the Yorktown and the USS Alabama. Those battleships are really cool. Yeah, they are those. Yeah.

[Connor Larson]

Tight fit on those. Yeah, yeah, some of them.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah, yeah. Just being out there and you're. I mean, you're out. There's just nothing, nothing you can do.

[Dusty Slay]

Is you and a bunch of other dudes just out there yelling at each other.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah. There's like 17 year olds who have gone around the world so solo in a boat and like a little sailboat and you're like, dude, how do you go back? What are you gonna go to senior year now? Like, it's. It's crazy to think about.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Larson]

You ever get into sea shanties? You ever sing them?

[Dusty Slay]

What is that, like a shack? Like a houseboat, but like a room.

[Connor Larson]

Like the songs sailors would say.

[Aaron Weber]

I've been on the road there and I've gotten, you know, listen to some sea shanties.

[Dusty Slay]

Oh, gosh.

[Connor Larson]

Just like you and your boys.

[Dusty Slay]

It's part of that music that we don't mesh.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Singing, it's part of that.

[Connor Larson]

What are you talking about, dude?

[Dusty Slay]

Sing us one.

[Connor Larson]

What shall you do with a drunken sailor? What shall you do with a drunken sailor? What should you do with a drunken sailor? Lie in the morning. You never get into that?

[Dusty Slay]

Nah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Just you and your boys?

[Connor Larson]

No, I just like to play them in the car and sing with them.

[Dusty Slay]

I could see if you're out on a boat for a long time though, just singing that with your friends.

[Connor Larson]

Can't you transport yourself with music like that? Like you imagine yourself?

[Dusty Slay]

I'm too far gone.

[Aaron Weber]

This boat you go, I'm on the hunley right now. I want to get off.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

What channel is that on?

[Connor Larson]

I mean. I mean, how old are you? Spotify, dude.

[Guest Advertiser]

What do you talk?

[Connor Larson]

What channel.

Is that? AM or fm? I got the Internet on my phone. Dude, go to sea shanties, man.

[Dusty Slay]

I thought a shanty was like a shack.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

It can be, but it also can.

[Connor Larson]

Be this.

Traditional folk songs. They used to quarrel, coordinate like that. Used to keep rhythm and time.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. So now you drive in your nice car and try to just remember what it was like to be a slave.

[Connor Larson]

I like to imagine. No, these are.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

You never go sing slaves. These are slave him, basically. Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

A lot of sailors were not there.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

The other day on our yacht. We were all singing slave songs and it felt great.

[Dusty Slay]

I just.

That's something like. You watch the Lord of the Rings or like, what is that the Hobbit? They get into, like, singing. So it's like when you had no entertainment, you had no tv, no radio, it's like singing with a group of people.

[Connor Larson]

Seems like you would love that.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, I would be into the camaraderie of.

[Connor Larson]

I just imagine on the boat with your boys. Yeah, like, you're about. You're thinking about being back at land.

[Dusty Slay]

Just when you seeing your girl. When you don't drink, though, it's like, nothing's fun.

[Aaron Weber]

Rotc.

[Connor Larson]

Well, these guys are all drunk.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, but.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Yeah, well. But I. Yeah, it's like, I think being. Going to war and like, doing like. Yeah, I could see.

[Dusty Slay]

Is this the only one?

I mean, I can get.

[Connor Larson]

You want to get into the.

[Dusty Slay]

I mean, we can do the deep.

[Aaron Weber]

Cuts if you want.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

How many times did you go to that? You always start with that one.

[Connor Larson]

No, I mean, I've never looked at these. I've Never listened on YouTube. The Weller man's a hot one. Oh, yeah. Nathan Evans, he's. He's one of the best.

[Aaron Weber]

Wow. He's got 5 million views. These are. There's.

[Connor Larson]

I mean, this has 447 million views, dude.

[Dusty Slay]

Wow.

[Connor Larson]

People are into the sea.

[Dusty Slay]

Sh. Half of these are Aaron, though, right? Long road trip.

Wow. That's probably copyright, though, huh? Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

But this guy's singing it like a real song.

[Connor Larson]

What do you mean?

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah, this. This guy's good.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah. Yeah, but I mean, so he. Is he recovering an old song?

[Connor Larson]

Yeah, it's like an old folk song.

[Dusty Slay]

This is good. I could get a. Into that.

[Aaron Weber]

I know he's tough at the holidays.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

I don't mind that.

[Connor Larson]

Be honest, Conor. I played it in the car. Be honest, dude. I mean, could you get into it?

[Aaron Weber]

I got into it. I also had. I was pretty exposed. I did rotc.

[Dusty Slay]

I appreciate the gig.

[Aaron Weber]

I'm featuring. Let me just. Let's go ahead and disagree. You know, I got a list of stuff I didn't like. No, I. I see them. They're good. And if you get.

[Connor Larson]

You could tell me to change something in the car.

[Guest Advertiser]

I don't care.

[Aaron Weber]

Well, theoretically, I would. I could, but I would never do that. That's. You got. You got to keep the code. But I like singing it. As long as you start singing it first first. You know what I mean?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

If someone's just. If you're not singing it, I'M just sitting there going, this is weird. But as long as you're singing it and we're both looking straight ahead and don't look at each other.

[Connor Larson]

A recognition of. Yeah, this is absurd, but it's kind of. It's just fun.

[Aaron Weber]

To hour seven on a car trip, though, I'll be like, you want to listen to phone calls from a radio show that ended in 30 years? Like, I'll listen to anything. Exactly.

[Connor Larson]

I'll pull up that Opie and Anthony compilation from 2003. Yeah, yeah, we're listening to all that. Anyway, give the sea shanties a try.

[Dusty Slay]

That's not bad. What was that guy's name?

[Connor Larson]

That guy's name is, I think, Nathan Evans. Add that to Nathan Evans. Yeah, I mean, he was hu. He had a real moment. 2020 on 2021.

[Dusty Slay]

447 million views.

[Connor Larson]

Song was massive, dude.

[Aaron Weber]

Yeah, he does cruises. Mainly.

[Dusty Slay]

Old cruises.

[Connor Larson]

Anyway. All right, that's boats.

[Dusty Slay]

Well, that was great.

[Connor Larson]

That was great.

[Dusty Slay]

It's a good episode.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Yeah.

[Dusty Slay]

One of the best, really.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

All right.

[Connor Larson]

It might be.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Have a wonderful night. We love you. See you.

[Dusty Slay]

Yeah.

[Aaron Weber]

Sam.

Foreign.

[Dusty Slay]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. The holiday season can be exhausting with all the parties and the end of year celebrations. But don't forget to take care of yourself by stocking up on your favorite nutritional products. Now through December 30, shop in store and online and save on items like.

[Aaron Weber]

Cliff Snack Bars, Luna Bars, Boost Nutritional.

[Dusty Slay]

Energy Drinks, Premier Protein Shakes, Z Bar Variety Packs, Open Nature Powder and Body Fortress Protein Protein powder offers end December 30th. Restrictions apply.

[Aaron Weber]

Offers may vary.

[Dusty Slay]

Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Commercial Narrator]

Enjoying a healthy dinner that tastes great means eating out at a pricey restaurant, right?

[Guest Advertiser]

Wrong.

[Commercial Narrator]

Healthy Choice Simply Steamers are delicious and healthy. The Tray N Tray Steam technology delivers crisp veggies and tender protein and tasty selections like Healthy Choice, Simply Steamers Grilled Chicken and Broccoli Alfredo. It's a satisfying meal with 28 grams of protein and nothing artificial. Healthy Choice Simply Steamers. What having it all tastes like. What do you think makes the perfect snack?

[Aaron Weber]

Hmm. It's gotta be when I'm really craving it and it's convenient.

[Commercial Narrator]

Could you be more specific?

[Dusty Slay]

When it's cravinient.

[Aaron Weber]

Okay. Like a freshly baked cookie made with real butter, available right down the street at ampm. Or a savory breakfast sandwich I can.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Grab in just a second at ampm.

[Dusty Slay]

I'm seeing a pattern here.

[Aaron Weber]

Well, yeah, we're talking about what I.

[Commercial Narrator]

Crave, which is anything from ampm.

[Aaron Weber]

What more could you want?

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Stop by AMPM where the snacks and.

[Aaron Weber]

Drinks are perfectly craveable and convenient. That's cravingience ampm.

[Nick Kate Bargetze]

Too much good stuff.