8: #8 | Westerns

Summary

Public Figures Podcast – Episode 8: “Westerns”

Date: March 25, 2026
Hosts: Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, Dusty Slay

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Episode Overview

In this lighthearted and nostalgia-driven episode, the Public Figures crew—Brian, Aaron, and Dusty—dive into the world of Westerns. From classic Western movies and TV shows to musings on cowboy culture, the guys reminisce about their favorites, debate what makes a true Western, and discuss why the genre has enduring appeal. Sprinkled throughout are the hosts’ signature comedic riffs, personal stories, and quirky tangents—everything from straw-opening techniques to their music-rankings and philosophical takes on “good guys vs. bad guys.”

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Weekend Recaps and Stand-Up Gigs ([01:11-04:00])

• The hosts catch up on where they’ve been performing: Paducah, St. Louis, Minneapolis, and Brian’s upcoming Grand Ole Opry appearance.
• Aaron shares excitement about his first solo gig in Minneapolis at Sisyphus Brewing.
• Dusty and others joke about tour bus culture, contemplating whether they’d go full “rock star” with wrapped buses.

2. Straw-Opening Techniques & Observational Humor ([08:22-10:14])

• Aaron discusses people’s unique ways of opening drinking straws. The others chime in, and Aaron demonstrates his habit of popping it with a fist—a “Brad Pitt in A River Runs Through It” moment, as Brian says.

“The great ones always find their own way.” – Brian ([10:02])

3. Baseball, Old Rosters, and the Romance of Nostalgia ([06:00-08:02], [30:29-33:05])

• The crew riffs on their favorite teams and baseball card collecting; Dusty impresses with his recall of early ‘90s Atlanta Braves lineups.
• Banter about Nashville’s hopes for an MLB team ignites jokes about generic/quirky team names: “Nashville Catfish,” “Nashville Stars,” etc.

“Catfish would be fun. That’s a serious fish.” – Dusty ([31:04])

4. Hangouts, Old Friends, and Uncle Pappy ([16:09-21:16])

• Dusty recounts meeting online personality “Uncle Pappy”—revealing he’s actually a much younger man using a filter. The group laughs over Dusty’s reunion with an old school dance partner, recreated photo and all.

5. Listener Comments & Playful Bickering ([34:55-41:16])

• The guys read fan comments, joke about the dynamic of the show, and reflect on podcast structure.
• Standout comment about Brian’s perceived “cockiness,” leading to Dusty saying: “I didn’t think you were joking.” ([04:08])

6. Bugles, Funerals, and the Myth of April Fool's Day ([43:44-41:16])

• Aaron admits to confusing bugle calls at funerals and a listener reveals that it’s often just a recording device.
• Dusty shares his philosophy on April Fool's Day and his own run-in with prank-gone-wrong on social media.

7. Western Genre: Defining the Classics ([78:04-121:12])

A. The Essence of Westerns ([82:29-84:43], [93:36-94:59])

• Dusty covers why old Westerns endure: clear morality, beautiful landscapes, a glimpse into a rugged era.
• He prefers straightforward good vs. evil stories, where the hero triumphs.

“Most Westerns, there’s a clear good guy and a clear bad guy... No redeemable characteristics to the bad guy.” – Dusty ([83:23])

B. Spaghetti Westerns & Iconic Directors ([84:55-86:34])

• Discussion on Sergio Leone, the “spaghetti Western” label, and how Italian directors brought new grit to the genre.
• Clarification: Spaghetti Westerns are simply Westerns made by Italians, often with morally ambiguous characters.

C. “Western Vibes” Beyond the Frontier ([88:44-90:22])

• Aaron wonders why movies like “Inglourious Basterds” feel like Westerns; Dusty says it’s about themes of frontier justice and mismatched morality.

D. End of the Western Boom & Modern Revivals ([98:43-99:13])

• They reminisce about the heyday of Westerns (1950s–1970s), why their production dropped, and how occasional modern films revive the spirit.

E. Modern Westerns: ([110:29-113:02])

• The crew highlights contemporary takes like “No Country for Old Men,” “Hell or High Water,” and “Electric Horseman”—noting the genre’s adaptability.
• Light mockery of absurd crossovers (“Cowboys & Aliens”).

F. Top Films & Recommendations ([94:36-110:29], [120:09-121:12])

• Titles mentioned/favored:
  • The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
  • Once Upon a Time in the West
  • Unforgiven
  • Tombstone
  • 3:10 to Yuma (“The 3:10 is the prison train.” – Dusty, [106:31])
  • Dances With Wolves
  • True Grit
  • The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (“Start with that one. I was blown away how good that movie was.” – Dusty [122:09])
  • Open Range
  • Young Guns / Young Guns II
  • Maverick
  • Rio Bravo
  • Little House on the Prairie (“They’re taking their phones…” – Dusty on the remake, [109:04])
• TV series: Bonanza, Gunsmoke (“That’s Gunsmoke. Longest running show till Simpsons.” – [94:40]), Columbo (as an analogy for predictable but satisfying formulas).

G. What Makes a Western a Western? ([88:44-90:01])

• Westerns are defined by their backdrops (1865–1900), high-stakes worlds with military-trained loners, “big sky” landscapes, and survival themes.
• Discussion about how daily life was shaped by necessity: “...whole day was filled meeting their needs—growing food, wrangling cattle, hunting, defending your house…” ([89:19])

H. Comic Westerns, Songs, and Growing Up ([112:11-119:56])

• Comedy/noir Westerns: Shanghai Noon, Maverick, O Brother Where Art Thou, etc.
• Songs about gunfighters (Dusty’s Top 5):
  1. “Don’t Take Your Guns to Town” (Johnny Cash)
  2. “Cattleman’s Gun” (Dean Brody)
  3. “Rocky Raccoon” (The Beatles)
  4. “Mr. Shorty” (Marty Robbins)
  5. “Big Iron” (Marty Robbins)
• Favorite country songs about cowboys, theme songs, and the cultural legacy of Western music.

8. Funniest and Most Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On living in the old west:
  “They probably didn’t have a lot of anxiety back then because you were just like, I got stuff to do.” – Dusty ([89:43])
• On John Wayne vs. Clint Eastwood:
  “If westerns were the WWE, I think John Wayne would be Hulk Hogan, and then Clint Eastwood would be like the crow sting.” – Dusty ([101:37])
• On opening straws:
  “I take it with a fist, hit it against the table, pop it out, bite it out with your mouth…” – Aaron ([09:16])
• On Catfish as a team name:
  “Catfish would be fun. That’s a serious fish.” – Dusty ([31:04])
• On familiar arguments:
  “No, but stars are, you know, it’s a dime a dozen.” – Dusty ([31:58])

9. Lightning Round: Listener Comments, Groceries, and Philosophies ([34:55-61:02])

• The hosts joke about regional pronunciations of “grocery,” ways to fix shopping carts, and philosophical approaches to images of God in media.

10. Closing and Recommendations ([120:24-121:12])

• Dusty strongly recommends “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” for Western newbies.
• The guys reflect on which classics or “starter” movies folks should try, welcoming listeners to share their picks.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• “The great ones always find their own way.” – Brian ([10:02])
• “Catfish would be fun. That’s a serious fish.” – Dusty ([31:04])
• “If westerns were the WWE, I think John Wayne would be Hulk Hogan, and then Clint Eastwood would be like the crow sting.” – Dusty ([101:37])
• “They probably didn’t have a lot of anxiety back then because you were just like, I got stuff to do.” – Dusty ([89:43])
• “I was blown away how good that movie was. Truly blown away.” – Dusty on “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” ([122:09])
• “The 3:10 is the prison train.” – Dusty ([106:31])
• “Start with ‘The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance.’” – Dusty ([122:09])

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Opening catch-ups / Tour bus talk: [01:11-12:08]
• Straw opening riff: [08:22-10:14]
• Baseball nostalgia / Nashville MLB hopes: [30:29-33:05]
• Uncle Pappy reveal/story: [17:17-18:09]
• Listener Comments and Show Dynamics: [34:55-41:16]
• Bugles, funerals, and imagery in religion: [43:44-67:09]
• Main Westerns Discussion Begins (What's in the Box): [78:04]
• Dusty’s overview: Why Westerns endure: [82:29-84:43]
• Spaghetti Westerns & Leone’s impact: [84:55-86:34]
• Modern Westerns/Revisionist genre: [110:29-113:02]
• Top country songs about gunfighters: [117:49-119:56]
• Which Western should a newbie start with?: [120:09-121:12]

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Episode Tone & Structure

• Comedic & Informal: The group’s signature banter, gentle ribbing, and self-deprecating humor keeps the tone light.
• Storytelling & Personal Reflection: Blends factoids with personal and family memories, rooting the discussion in lived experience and Americana.
• Accessible & Inviting: The conversation welcomes listeners who may not be Western buffs and gives clear movie recs for those curious about the genre.

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Summary Verdict

For longtime fans and newcomers alike, this episode is a heartfelt—and often hilarious—love letter to the Western genre. Whether you’re looking for a starting point (“The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance,” “Tombstone,” “Unforgiven”), fun facts about the real wild west, or just a reminder of why simple stories about good guys and bad guys still matter, the Public Figures’ take is as entertaining as any classic shootout on the silver screen.

Transcript

[A]

Natland is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance, Progressive Casualty Insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations. Welcome in, ladies and gentlemen. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, good night. Whenever you're listening, we appreciate the fact that you're listening. Welcome to the Public Figures podcast. Three Nashville based standup comedians, three just dudes and three public figures. I'm Aaron Weber alongside my co host Brian Bates and Dusty Slay.

[B]

All right, finally get my own intro back. Yeah, that feels good.

[A]

Where can people see you this weekend, Dusty?

[B]

Oh, this weekend I'm in Paducah, Kentucky and in St. Louis, Missouri. Both shows almost sold out, so get yourself some tickets.

[A]

All right. What about you, Brian?

[C]

This Saturday I'm at the Grand Ole Opry. It's been a while. A few months since I've been there. Sunday.

[A]

It's been like over a year, right? I mean, I've been there forever.

[C]

I was there. No, I think last summer. Fall.

[A]

Okay. Yeah, a year ago.

[C]

Well, you said it's been over a year and that's. It's been like six to nine months last year.

[A]

I meant that's last year though, right?

[C]

Yeah, I was there in December. It's been three months.

[A]

Yeah, it was 2025.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah, but not a full year.

[A]

We're like almost done with 2026 already. Yeah, it's been, it's been a long time, man.

[C]

Sunday.

[A]

Trying to actually has a residency there or something. It's been a minute.

[C]

It has. Didn't I start by saying it's been a while? And then you said, yeah, it's been over a year.

[B]

You took it too far to where you're took it too far.

[A]

I said it's been like a year, man. It was 2025 when you were there.

[C]

Okay, I guess I misheard you. And then Sunday, Brian Bates and friends here at Zany's. I just said my last name kind of wrong, but Brian Bates and friends here at Zany's at the lab. And tickets. Not many tickets left, guys. It could be sold out by the time this comes out.

[A]

I love it.

[C]

That's my tune up for Monday, my special, the big special. The big special. So I'm excited about that. So that's what I got.

[A]

How you feel about things? Feel good about it.

[C]

Filling. Yeah. Can we get into our weekend?

[A]

Yeah. I'm also going to be somewhere this weekend.

[C]

Oh, I'm going to be in. But you see, you were taking 20,

[B]

26 off the whole year.

[A]

I would be in Minneapolis this weekend. This is Aaron Weber speaking. I'm going to be the Sisyphus Brewing Company. I've never done Minneapolis. I've done St. Paul. I've been across the river. This is my first time headlining somewhere in Minneapolis. So we got two shows are sold out. There's two that are not. Okay. So come to one of those shows if you're in the Minneapolis area. Brian. Let's get into it, man.

[C]

Last week I introduced the show by saying, hello, common folks, and hey, bores. And people have asked, are you saying, like, the animal bores? I'm like, no. I mean, like, you people are boring. Because, yes, we're public figures and you guys aren't. We have more exciting life. So I just want to clarify.

[A]

Even more condescending than you thought it

[B]

was, but hey, bear and hey, boar. Maybe that was what they were drawing. The connection they were drawing probably another animal.

[C]

But I just. Yeah, I just want to clarify now. No, it's not the. I just. I think people are probably boring because you're not celebrities like I am. I want people to know that. Right.

[B]

I agree with you.

[C]

And I also want the people who email me saying, you're getting a little cocky to know I'm just joking as well.

[B]

Yeah. I didn't think you were joking.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

I took it very serious.

[A]

There's a little bit of vitriol behind the eyes. That's real.

[B]

I think I like this side of you, though. I want you to let it fully manifest.

[C]

What if we did just one episode?

[A]

Okay.

[C]

We announced it ahead of time so parents can prepare where it's not clean. We just.

[A]

We just go off.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And we finally get to see the

[C]

real Brian N. Land After Dark.

[A]

Nate. Land After Dark.

[C]

How about that?

[B]

I would like that for the people that sometimes think that things are a little out of control, really blow their minds.

[C]

Yeah. Can we do that? Adrian just. Oh, yeah. He said, yeah. Neyland After Dark.

[A]

I don't feel real confident that nod. I don't think it's going to happen, but yeah, man.

[C]

Well, cool. What's that hat?

[A]

This is an Edmonton Elks hat. This is the Canadian Football league team in Edmonton. You land in Edmonton and there's a bunch of stuff at the airport. And you're like, man, they really are into the Edmonton Elks here.

[B]

Lot of. A lot of hockey stuff.

[A]

Well, there's the hockey stuff and then there's. There's some Edmonton Elk stuff. I go, oh, they're embracing football. And then I don't think I saw a single human being wearing merch or thinking about this team one time the whole weekend I was there.

[B]

Or maybe that's the push, but I

[A]

wanted to get a hat.

[B]

I wanted to represent the public spaces. They're like, let's. Let's push these teams.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Just to try to get the ball

[B]

rolling a little bit.

[A]

It's not working. It's all Oiler stuff.

[C]

I like how you collect. You collect key cards. You collect hats. Anything else?

[B]

Baseball cards?

[A]

Yeah, I guess so.

[C]

But I mean, even on the road, like, you have a. I think that's cool.

[A]

I like to get a little something. You got a natural sounds hat on.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because baseball season starts this week.

[A]

It is, man. It's getting going. Are you excited, Dusty?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Who are you rooting for this season? Oh, probably Yankees and the Red Sox, Alabama, Auburn.

[B]

There's really too many to choose from. It's really hard to narrow it down.

[A]

Yeah, there's 30. Yeah, there's 30 teams.

[B]

So many good ones that I couldn't dare pick one.

[A]

Who do you think the best team of baseball is?

[B]

Right? Oh, I think it's probably the Atlanta Braves.

[A]

Well, yeah, they're. I mean, they're going to be all right.

[C]

Yeah, that's the only team.

[B]

You know, they're always the best. I can't wait to see Greg Maddox on the mound. Greg. Greg Olson, maybe Greg Olson from the Carolina Panthers. Yeah.

[A]

Now a broadcast.

[B]

He was a. He was a catcher.

[C]

There was a baseball. Gregor.

[A]

Oh, okay. I'm thinking of the other. Maybe there's Matt Olson, who's the first base.

[B]

Maybe we can get. Oh, I thought it was. I thought Fred McGriff was there. Yeah.

[A]

Hall of Famer now.

[C]

Crime Dog.

[B]

And Ron Gann. And the outfield. Dave Justice, Otis Nixon, Mark Lemke. I'm impressed.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Terry Pendleton. I mean, I'm. I can't. Wait. Javier Lopez. I can't wait.

[A]

You really followed baseball heavily and then you tapped out hard, huh?

[B]

Yeah, that's what it feels like.

[A]

You know, the whole roster, you know,

[C]

the whole early 90 branch.

[A]

What year is that? Yeah, 93 or something.

[B]

So World Series.

[A]

Oh, 95.

[B]

Yeah. Well, that was Fred McGriff. It was okay. Sid Bream was the first baseman when they won the first. First one.

[A]

Do you know Bobby Cox, the manager of the Braves that time? He holds. He holds the record for most career ejections. He's been thrown out of more games than anybody in baseball. 162 games. That's an entire season. I love that he got thrown out

[C]

of a whole season.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

Isn't that. That's like, you know.

[B]

Did I say Jeff Blauser? Yeah, I did.

[A]

Oh, thank God.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Steve Avery.

[A]

It's like.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, George Bush Jr. Took like 365 vacation days.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

He was just a vacation. A whole year.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

George W. Bush.

[A]

Yeah. Isn't that crazy?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know what a vacation day is actually like for a president. I'm sure they're doing stuff, but just to be on vacation. You're there eight years, in an entire year, you're on vacation.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's pretty nuts.

[B]

I think they're pretty much always on vacation. Okay. I think a president's always just like, what is it? I don't know.

[A]

You want to settle something for me? I got a straw right here. I was thinking about this last weekend.

[C]

All right.

[A]

I want to see how you open the straw. Don't think about it. Just open it like you would open a straw.

[B]

Well, I. You know.

[A]

Hold on, hold on. I missed it. How'd you do it? You tore off the top.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

See, that's what I was going to do, too.

[A]

And then you pull it out.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Sometimes you can go like this.

[A]

Oh. You push it out with the thumb.

[B]

I do that sometimes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Pull it out.

[A]

And then you pull it out.

[C]

I do do that now with my daughter.

[A]

So I was at Bucky's, and I was just watching people open straws, and everybody did it a little differently.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

I've always done it.

[C]

Like, how long were you there?

[A]

I mean that.

[C]

He has hard data on straw removal.

[B]

They had a beef jerky buffet.

[C]

Clinical research.

[A]

I take it with a fist, hit it against the table, pop it out, bite it out with your mouth, and then you can grab that and put that in right in the drink.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

All right. But I haven't seen anybody else do that. I'm wondering where I learned how to open a straw like that. Or if it's just like, gut instinct.

[C]

Yeah. I think that's, you know, another way

[B]

when you work in a restaurant, you hold the.

[A]

Hold on. I want to see it. I got a straw.

[B]

Kind of hold this part. And then you can tear it off and then you can pull that. That way, when you put it in the drink, the tip is not.

[A]

Oh, you want to leave it. You'd leave it on like that. Okay.

[B]

That's where I worked. We just had, you know, a box of straws that were all unopened, and we would just grab them, but you

[C]

saw no one else.

[B]

But we did wash our hands.

[A]

Never. Never. That take. The first thing they do is hit it down and then bite it off.

[C]

I think the great ones always done. They find their own way.

[A]

Thanks, man.

[C]

I appreciate it. You're like Brad Pitt and. And River Runs Through It. You come up your own style.

[A]

That's right. Yeah. The Weber runs through it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, dude. Become ungovernable. That's what I like to say.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Live your own life. Anyway, I was only there for like 10 minutes, but if you just watch people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Out of Buc EE's. It's a lot going on.

[C]

So where you throw your trash for now?

[A]

What, do you want me to get up and go to a trash can?

[C]

All right.

[A]

Trash collector number two,

[C]

May 29th in theaters everywhere. The Breadwinner.

[A]

It's coming out, man. It's coming out.

[C]

So this weekend, I was on the road with Johnny W. And Ed Wiley. We're all friends with those guys.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And Johnny's got a bus tour. He's doing churches.

[A]

Tour bus, man.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. And we were in Destin, Florida. Pompano Beach, Florida. Tallahassee, Florida, and then last night in Gadsden, Alabama.

[B]

What was that tour bus party like?

[C]

It was wild. It was wild.

[B]

A couple of guitars on there, singing some songs.

[C]

It had a goat.

[A]

Yeah, they're playing Apples to Apples after Midnight. No, it's. It is so much fun on a tour bus, man. Especially when it's your buddies like that, Right. Just hanging out. Does he have a room in the back, Johnny W. Yep. And you're on a bunk.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

How's. How nice is the bunk, though? It must be. If it's that few people on the bus, it must be one of the bigger ones, right?

[C]

No, I mean, he has audio guy.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

He has his tour manager. He has a guy who is pitching for Compassion International. It's. That's who's fun.

[A]

So it's a large. It's a big operation.

[C]

Yeah, it was a. The tour bus was packed. His wife came with him.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Nice dude.

[C]

So I guess that was his wife back there. I don't know what Johnny does that back room. I just know it was a woman. Hey, I don't ask, don't tell. Right?

[A]

That's great. Would you ever do a tour bus tour, Dusty, do you think?

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, you're like right there if you.

[C]

His face would be on the side, day one.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know. I. I like the idea because I don't want to drive everywhere anymore. I don't really want to fly all the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think the tour bus would be the way, but I don't, you know, I just like to go out on Friday and Saturday, so it's hard to

[A]

do to make it worth it. You probably have to do Thursday through

[B]

Sunday and then I have to take the whole family. And then we'd be, you know, it'd be a lot to have the whole thing.

[A]

You'd need two buses.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

One for the family, one for everybody else.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

One for the guy doing three minutes on the show.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe I get the driver to do a little time and then not even have to take an opener.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

To just walk out and do announcements. And then here's Dusty. Yeah, that would be fun. I love. I've. I've done. I did the bus tour with Chris years ago. Yeah. Natal. Natal. Do the buses and trying to think of who else has had one. It's such a cool. It's such a. I don't know. You feel like a rock star.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I'd like a bus with like a little screened in porch on the back.

[A]

You probably do that.

[B]

That way you just hang out there and just smoke the whole time. You drive. I am.

[A]

Oh, Burt. Yeah.

[B]

Pretty nicotine has really got a stronghold on me right now.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I'm into it.

[A]

It's a drive.

[C]

You've been on Burt's bus.

[A]

I have, yeah.

[C]

Rest in peace.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah. The one that burned down.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That's why you don't put your face all over the side of a bus.

[B]

Something's burning.

[A]

Something is burning for sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

His tour bus went down, then another tour bus went down in the same part of the country. There's something going on out there in the.

[C]

What's going on, Dusty?

[B]

In the west, there's so much going on.

[A]

But if you put your. Your face all over the side of a tour bus, then it's a little embarrassing if it breaks down.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I would just keep it.

[B]

I like. Yeah, I do like a. Nothing on there.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Ralph. Or maybe someone else.

[C]

Ralphie used to have.

[A]

Wait.

[B]

You know, just.

[C]

Just to throw people off.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. Hardy.

[A]

A comedian.

[B]

Yeah. Comedian or maybe like, like, you know, Rodney Dangerfield on the side. So people would be like, well, who's in there? Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, that's awesome, guys. This time of year makes us all want to refresh our place. With Wayfair, you can do it all in one place. From furniture to decor to organization and outdoor essentials. Wayfair makes it easy to find everything you want to fit your style and needs. Easily upgrade your space with quality pieces that are within your budget, plus enough fast and free shipping. Abigail, one of our producers, she just bought a new home this past year. She's going for a more modern farmhouse style. The rugs she found on Wayfair were amazing quality and fits every space perfectly. She also purchased a new office chair that fits great in her home office, just like farms have. This spring, she wants to focus on her outdoor patio and Wayfair makes that all possible in one place. Dusty, you've bought a lot of stuff from Wayfair.

[B]

I bought a thing or two. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. Wayfair makes it simple to narrow down exactly what works for your style and budget. They have great features like reviews from customers, filters and even visuals to even visual tools to help you find the right fit. Wayfair is different from other home retailers. They offer installation and assembly service available so you can have seamless experience. Thousands of five star reviews help you shop with confidence. Abigail's used Wayfair for years and has found it easy to shop order. And every piece she has gotten has been amazing quality. So find furniture, decor and essentials that fit your unique style and budget. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's W A Y F a I o r.com Wayfair Every style, every home.

[A]

I was in Texas this weekend with Kathleen Madigan. We're in Houston and then Fort Worth. I got to go to the stockyards in Fort Worth. I'd never been. That's where Old Cowboy Town. So I'm sure we'll. It felt right given the topic today. So we'll get into that. But two great shows with Kathleen. Just fun weekend. A lot of people were in the crowd that listen to this podcast and it wasn't like I was announced on those shows. It was like got some real comedy fans.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Who listen in. That's pretty fun. What about you, Dusty? Where were you at?

[B]

I went to Florida. I did Clearwater, Florida on Friday. Hot shell. Really hot shell. And then we went out to Clearwater beach, found a cigar bar. Not on the beach, but you know, another Block over. We'd be on the beach. Outdoor seating, had about 12 people. Fans. Some people I knew, some people I just met had a little hang. My. My opener friend Vince Fabra, Rashad Baker, a comic out of Florida, and Paul Farvar headlining a club right above the cigar bar.

[A]

Oh, that's awesome.

[B]

So he came down, we hung. It was great. That's Uncle Pappy. You know Uncle Pappy from the Internet guy? Old guy that's always in the swamp doing videos. He was there. Wow.

[C]

It seems like somebody you'd probably be a fan of.

[B]

Yeah, we're friends before this. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Wait, how do you know him? Just through the Internet.

[B]

Yeah, that's how I met him initially. Uncle Pappy.

[A]

Oh, this guy?

[C]

Yeah. Just kind of assumed Dusty would know

[B]

him, but turns out his secret's been revealed. But Uncle Pappy is about 30 years old and uses an old man filter. He. He really took off as this old

[A]

man and just became the old man.

[B]

Yeah, and then he went on Pete Holmes to reveal himself. And I met him at the Hollywood Improv the night before he did the reveal. Wow. Yeah.

[A]

And you didn't know it was him then?

[B]

No, we. We talked and he goes, he's like, I'm in. I'm in la. I'd like to come to your show. And I go, great, I'll give you a ticket. And then he goes, I just got to tell you something, though. I'm a lot younger than what I look like. Yeah, but it's great.

[A]

Uncle Pappy is a popular social media personality known for spreading positivity, environmental advocacy, and philosophical slow living wisdom from a Van Life perspective. Sounds up your alley.

[C]

Yeah, it sounds like it's Dusty's bio.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. That's cool.

[B]

So it was a good hang.

[C]

Did your parents come to the show in Fort Worth?

[A]

They did, yeah, they did come.

[C]

Have they ever met Kathleen?

[A]

They hadn't met her. I mean, they met her briefly at the Praters, our fundraiser. Fundraiser event last year. But it was the first time seeing her, you know, do her.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

And then also I went to Orlando. Not to cut you guys off from this, I just want to finish my. My travels. But then Orlando the next night, and it was great. And I had a similar hang. We. We didn't find, you know, we found a. Some kind of bar that had an outdoor smoking area. Uncle Poppy and my. A friend that I went to the school d. Dance with, I think in the eighth grade, she says the seventh grade. I'm pretty sure it was the eighth Grade. And she came with her husband and she brought the picture, and then. So we recreated the picture, you know. Did you.

[C]

That was great.

[A]

Recognize her? Like, when she. When she. When you saw her?

[B]

Well, she basically looks exactly the same, but, yeah, I.

[C]

Did she recognize you?

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

And sorry, we're using dial up here at Zany's,

[B]

so. Yeah, so that's us in, I think seventh. I think eighth grade.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Very cute.

[B]

And. And then.

[C]

That is so great.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Your hand.

[A]

Respectful on the hand.

[B]

Well, I married her husband's there. The next picture there, I wanted to do. I wanted him to do one where he's like, throat, like, punch me.

[A]

But no, I could see it as he's a lawyer.

[C]

It's almost better the way you have it.

[B]

Yeah. So this is fun.

[C]

You look very uncomfortable.

[B]

Yeah, well, I'm trying to do the serious pose that I'm doing.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because you're trying to look cool in this first picture, right?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[A]

Look at that. He had the corsage and everything.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, that's big time. Was that like, what, like, did you bring her homecoming or something?

[B]

What's that?

[C]

Did you bring her that corsage?

[B]

I think so. Yeah.

[A]

That's usually how it works, right?

[C]

Yeah, yeah. But I just wanted to double check.

[B]

Yeah, I'm wearing a tie here, too, but the tie. Tie is a just.

[C]

Oh, I thought you were calling me out. Well, you have a. Would you say that's a bowl cut you have there?

[B]

I'd say it's about as bold as it gets. Pretty sure my mom was cutting my hair.

[A]

Yeah. I might have literally used a bowl.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Can I see her again? In the current? She's aged a little bit better than you have, Dusty.

[B]

You think? I think we've aged about the same.

[A]

She's aged a little less dramatically. You got a whole. You got a whole new look. That's from the last.

[B]

That's true. That's true.

[C]

Yeah, Y' all both look great.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's really cool.

[B]

So that was fun. We hung out. Now, how I saw hung out, I mean, this hang. I had friends that I used to work with at Hyman's.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So a friend that listens to the podcast. You know, I'm just. Yeah, this was our hangout in Clearwater. We had a cool hang there. And Uncle Pappy is the guy next to Paul Farvar there to the right. Yeah, that's Uncle Pappy.

[A]

Okay. And it's like Cousin Pappy.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we had a good time both Both sold out shows.

[A]

Awesome.

[B]

Really great.

[A]

You stopped by the Scientology center at all?

[B]

No, but I was downtown. Apparently that's where it's at.

[A]

That's where the main thing is.

[C]

I didn't know that. Yeah, just assumed it was in California or something.

[A]

I mean, they got a big presence in LA too, but.

[B]

Well, Vince flew out of Atlanta on Friday and he had a 2 hour and 45 minute wait in the TSA line, missed his flight and had to book another one. And so he showed up, you know, just in time. So we just drove to the theater.

[C]

Why didn't he fly out of Birmingham?

[B]

He was doing a show in Lexington, South Carolina the night before. So he thought, well, this will be great. I'll just drive to Atlanta, get on a flight, easy peasy. Yeah.

[A]

Three hours.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

How were your flights?

[A]

They were fine. I got lucky. Well, I took all the smaller southwest airports, so Nashville was fine. I flew into Hobby in Houston, that was fine. And then I flew out of Dallas.

[B]

Love.

[A]

But I heard DFW was bad and I heard George Bush was bad in

[B]

Houston, so I can tell you clear feels pretty good during those times.

[A]

I bet it does. I bet it does, man.

[C]

Huh? I got a little Nateland news to share.

[A]

All right, get into it.

[C]

Brad Upton this Sunday, guys. He is at the Franklin Theater doing two shows. He's filming his hour special. I think the shows are at three o' clock and seven o'. Clock. Okay, Tickets available.

[B]

Three o'. Clock, I like that. Yeah, seven. Give you a lot of space in between.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Get a nap in.

[C]

Yeah. Go to both.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Go sleep in your car and go back in.

[A]

You'll forget most of the first show by the second show, go back and see it again.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then Monday, March 30th, Naelyn presents Brian Bates and Friends. Not on the 30th.

[A]

Yeah, no friends.

[C]

No, just you guys.

[B]

Brian Bates and colleagues.

[C]

That might be the title of my special.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm going to put you guys in the special just to fill the time.

[A]

Brian Bates and acquaintances.

[C]

Plus my merch pitch.

[A]

Merch pitch in the special would be awesome.

[C]

It would, wouldn't it? Anyway, it's sold out. I don't even know why I'm telling you guys, but tickets are still available, as I've already mentioned, for Sunday night, the warmup night. N presents The Showcase Season 4. Vince Caron was this past week. It was great.

[B]

Very funny.

[C]

Yeah. And this Thursday at 7 o' clock central, John Hefron. Now, John was on the one I hosted. He is so funny.

[A]

John's unbelievable.

[B]

One of the original winners of Last

[A]

Comic Stand, I think the first season, right?

[C]

I think so.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I think so. John is. Oh, season two, it says if I just read. He was the winner of season two.

[B]

I think the first one was the Ralphie Man.

[A]

That fan.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. But John just killed it that night. He's so funny. And we have a new comic every week, so go check him out. Nate's Greatest Average American Game show airs Wednesday night tonight on abc. Check your local listings. And Dusty's book, We're having a good Time is on pre order. Reserve a copy anywhere you buy books. Comes out November 10th.

[B]

Yeah,

[C]

it does.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

My birthday's November 3rd, so, you know,

[A]

it's a good birthday gift.

[B]

A little bit of a late birthday gift.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's all I want.

[B]

Once you start to settle down from. From really the high of the birthday celebration, you settle in and read a book.

[C]

Yeah. My birthday always falls. Well, not always, but very often. I think this year falls on election day.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So I have a joke, like no one's excited about my birthday. Like, everyone's just mad at each other.

[A]

At least half. Yeah. At least half the country's mad.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. But leading up, like, if I have a birthday party on the second, nobody's talking about my. My birthday.

[A]

Bad. But hold on.

[B]

You've reached an age, I think, where people stop talking about them.

[A]

But at a regular birthday party. They're not just talking about your birthday, though.

[C]

Well, they should be. They should be. They should be.

[A]

You walk up to a group.

[B]

Do you know this is for Brian's birthday? Gosh, I can't believe he keeps having them.

[A]

Yeah, should be.

[C]

Nate hosted me. Remember he hosted that wedding party for us at his house?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It was on Super Bowl Sunday.

[A]

Super Bowl Sunday.

[C]

I kept going around, people say, you know, it's. This is party for us. Right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I wanted people to know. Yeah, well, I just didn't want to think they were there for the Super Bowl.

[A]

Let's not bury the lead here.

[B]

Yeah, we're here for your celebration. Sure. Watch the super bowl if you want while you're here.

[C]

That was a boring super bowl though, wasn't it?

[A]

They're all boring to me. That one went to overtime.

[B]

You're like, I don't know why you guys keep thinking overtime means it's exciting.

[A]

I can't imagine why we would think

[B]

that the game was zero to zero the whole time and then went into overtime.

[A]

Well, it wasn't that'd be a defensive start and be great. It wasn't zero to zero. Well, the teams had scored.

[C]

You know what?

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

Don't remember that one. I think was kind of boring. I think it was the Chiefs and the 49ers that year. Yeah, but I think the Chiefs won. Not a blowout. But it wasn't close. I think that year. Yes.

[B]

I'd rather see a blowout with a lot of Hail Marys. I think that'd be awesome.

[C]

Even after they've been blown them out. Just keep throwing Hail Marys.

[A]

By the way, I bought a book at the airport this weekend.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I read about half of it.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Project Hail Mary.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Have you seen that? The movie just came out.

[B]

I haven't.

[C]

I mean, I hear it's good. Seemed like something you would like.

[A]

Dusty, it's the guy that wrote the Martian.

[B]

I've seen the Martian. Is that. That's Matt Damon.

[A]

Matt Damon, stranded on Mars. Well, this one is more ridiculous.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He didn't like that one.

[C]

Supposedly, the Martian is based on more realistic scientific stuff than any NASA movie ever.

[A]

The premise of Project Hail Mary.

[C]

I just want to see Dusty's face.

[A]

The premise of Project Hail Mary is a guy. It's a scientist, and he wakes up on a spaceship, doesn't remember anything about who he is or what he's doing, and he slowly starts to remember his life. And what's happening is.

[C]

Well, don't tell me too much. I want.

[A]

Well, this is the. This is all back of the book.

[C]

Okay. Well, I don't plan on reading the book.

[A]

Well, it's all the back of the book.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

You know what I mean? It's like.

[C]

I know what you're.

[A]

Synopsis.

[C]

Okay. All right.

[A]

He discovers there's an alien life form that's eating the sun and.

[C]

I'll leave.

[A]

I'll leave.

[C]

Take a while.

[A]

But they're growing exponentially.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

So they think in 30 years, the sun's going to be dimmed 10%, which would effectively kill all of humanity.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

So he's been tasked with figuring this out, how to stop it,

[C]

try to offset it.

[B]

Well, apparently, if the sun were dimmed, then the moon would not be as bright either.

[C]

That's true. But if we dim the sun a little bit.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. It'd be reflecting less light.

[C]

But then. Have we talked about multiple times how we want to dim the sun to help with the.

[B]

Well, Bill Gates. That's what he wants to do, not us.

[A]

Yeah, but there's a difference.

[C]

I just Meant society.

[A]

Yeah. They don't want to dim it 10, though.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

10 is crazy. Yeah. We would all die.

[C]

Okay. Is that. That's true.

[A]

10, I have to imagine. Yeah. I mean, they wouldn't. They wouldn't lie to me in Project Hail Mary.

[B]

You think you'll finish it?

[A]

I do, actually. The way it's written is really fun. The guy is funny.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Now, we just talked last week about.

[A]

It's a good book. New York Times, Best in Movies.

[C]

And you said you didn't read, and we all said, yeah, the movie's just. Wait for the movie. So what made you buy a book that the movie's coming out?

[A]

Ryan Gosling looked great on the COVID I don't know. It was all over, like, one of these Al Jazeera news whatever it's called.

[C]

Maybe a Flip Johnson was on you to buy it, Dusty.

[B]

Yeah. And probably so. Probably so. But not Ryan Gosling. You see the. You see the promo of him supposedly throwing the ball for. He threw a Hail Mary for the promo?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

It's clearly not what he did. He didn't throw that ball like that.

[A]

Yeah. I think that's obvious.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't know what you're talking about,

[B]

but he looks like he can't even throw a ball.

[A]

He's also not really in space in the movie, too.

[B]

Well, I don't know. I mean, you. If he were, you guys would be like, oh, what a feat of cinematic glory. I know. He's not in space.

[A]

I know. I know.

[C]

You know, I agree with you on that. I do not think Ryan Gosling's in space.

[B]

Yeah,

[C]

well, that's cool. I. I think Nashville will get a Major League baseball team the next few years.

[A]

I'm hoping so. I think we're at the top. Every time a list comes out of what city's about to get one, Nashville's number one.

[B]

What would you want them to be called? Would you want it to be Tennessee or Nashville?

[A]

They're going to be the Nashville Stars. When we get a team, there's a Negro League team here back in. So it's like an homage to that. The Nashville Stars.

[C]

That is lame.

[A]

What do you want it to be?

[B]

Well, I don't know that I thought it would be fun to, you know, play around with some ideas.

[A]

What do you think about Nash? What do you think about the Nashville Catfish?

[B]

I like it.

[A]

Yeah, Catfish would be fun.

[B]

Well, it's like, Stars is so. It's just generic, right? It's like, let's go. Yeah, Catfish. Nobody has a Catfish. Yeah, the Nashville Catfish. I like Tennessee Catfish.

[A]

Tennessee Catfish would be nice, but the. The major league teams, with a few exceptions, they all. They do tend to have more serious names than like, minor league.

[B]

Yeah. You know, the Catfish. I mean, that's a serious fish.

[A]

It'll get you. You know, Catfish will bite.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. I almost wore my Nashville Stars hat,

[A]

but I decided to go get the Nashville sounds.

[C]

Nashville Sounds.

[A]

Sounds and stars.

[B]

See, sounds is unique.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because, you know, it's Nashville, it's music. So it's like. That's unique.

[A]

Can you name another protein that has stars as the name?

[B]

No, but stars. But stars are, you know, it's a dime a dozen.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

All right.

[B]

Back in. Whenever. This other league, we'll let the Negro

[C]

League know that Dusty doesn't approve.

[B]

Back then, you know, maybe stars wasn't so overused.

[A]

They would have been thinking about. They had the Atlanta Black Crackers.

[B]

What do you think about. I like that.

[A]

The Nashville Black Crackers.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

NBC.

[B]

Yeah, I like that. That's fun.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Indianapolis Clowns. They had great names.

[B]

I like that.

[A]

Clowns. Homestead Grays. That one's not as fun.

[B]

I don't mind it.

[A]

The Grays.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You like grays better than stars.

[B]

Yeah. I just feel like stars. You know, our country, where the star. Star spangled Banner.

[C]

We have stars here in Nashville.

[A]

Nashville Stripes would be good.

[B]

Nashville Stripes. Yeah. I don't mind that. The. I just. You didn't ever hear that. But stars are fading out. We. You know, you don't. It's not the star power like there used to be.

[A]

No, that. We're going to bring it back.

[C]

Maybe that's part of the Nashville public figures.

[B]

Yeah. Too many Nashville figures.

[C]

Do you know what the. Our old minor league baseball team was called?

[A]

No, what was it? The Nashville Vols Volunteers.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. I don't like that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What's weird now? Because, I mean, I guess it was weird then. Tennessee Vols were such a big deal,

[B]

but that's what they were. They were just like, well, let's just keep this.

[A]

This name thing can just reuse the merch.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Same logo, too, you know. This episode is brought to you by IQ Bar, our exclusive snack, hydration and coffee sponsor. IQ Bar Protein bars, IQ Mix hydration mixes and IQ Joe mushroom coffees are the delicious low sugar brain and body fuel you need to win your day. I got with me here at the table the ultimate sampler pack. It's a terrific way to try all of IQ Bars, products and flavors. You get nine IQ Bars, eight IQ Mix sticks and four IQ Joe Sticks. All other products are clean label certified entirely free from gluten, dairy, soy, GMOs and artificial ingredients. They're all packed with clean, delicious ingredients that keep you physically and mentally fit. Like magnesium. I take a lot of magnesium, lion's mane and more. IQ Mix is a zero sugar drink mix that hydrates with electrolytes, improves your mood and boosts clarity. I use the IQ mix and and it's great. And right now IQ Bar is offering our special podcast listeners 20% off all IQ Bar products, including the Sampler pack, plus free shipping. To get your 20% off, text N A T E that's Nate to 64,000. Text Nate to 64,000. That's Nate to 64,000. Message and data rates may apply. C terms for details.

[C]

Should we get these comments?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Comments come From Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Apple Podcast reviews and mail at Nateland Podcast.com but mainly YouTube and mail at Nateland Podcast.Com unless I see something good about myself from another point, then it might

[A]

make it on if you comment something nice about Brian anywhere on the Internet. Yeah, he'll find it.

[C]

Yeah, I'll find it.

[B]

Oh, can I say they go, it's not worth it.

[A]

I'm about to go back.

[C]

Nah, I'm good.

[A]

I joked last week you could Venmo me a comment and a lot of people did that and I have to go back and refund all of them. So please, please don't.

[B]

What was the most amount of money you got?

[A]

20 bucks.

[B]

Keep it. Keep it. Read the comment.

[C]

Well, let's read it.

[A]

Should I read the comment? Yeah, we got to open up Venmo

[B]

and then send it to me.

[A]

I'm refunding all of them, but I feel bad taking money. Not this one taking money. You're going to read it, but yeah, I think I said please don't do that.

[C]

Dusty's doing the research this week. I'd say read them all.

[A]

Okay. He said. This is from Jeremy Dbler Dibler. I had to give this a shot. My son and I have been fans since the gout days. Your stuff is the best. You mentioned that you play keys. I'm the lead singer of a band called FFH and I've always wondered if we were on your youth group soundtrack. Either way, thank you. Thank you. Yeah. Well, that's awesome. Thank you, Jeremy. I'll refund this.

[B]

Keep the money. Keep the money or making you read that comment.

[C]

He's promoting his band.

[A]

Thank you, Jeremy. I haven't heard of Your band? I'll check them out. My youth group playlist is mostly songs in Latin, stuff like that, so.

[C]

Ffh.

[B]

Future Farmers of Hawaii.

[C]

That was the. That was my first concert. Ffh.

[A]

Were they really?

[C]

Yeah, it was.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, God.

[A]

Yeah. Well, this definitely the lead singer.

[C]

That's awesome.

[A]

Lead singer Venmo.

[B]

Me.

[A]

20 bucks.

[B]

So they're doing well?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Got 20 bucks to throw around.

[A]

Well enough I don't have to refund that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But everybody please stop doing that. Thank you.

[B]

They could maybe send it to Tristan to get his money back for that ticket. No, you can keep it.

[A]

How was the concert?

[B]

I'm sure they're good. No, it's great. I loved it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think I got their drummer's drumstick from it. Oh, what does FFH stand for? Far From Home.

[A]

Far From Home.

[B]

Okay. Oh, Far From Home. I might have heard of that. I never heard of ff.

[C]

That's a movie.

[A]

They're from Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

[B]

I love that place. Yeah.

[C]

Okay. Rachel Woolston loved Aaron's handle on the topic.

[A]

All right.

[C]

It's obvious he's from a family of teachers. He would make an amazing Sunday school teacher. He shares his points and handles interaction while staying on topic. Good job, Aaron.

[A]

Oh, thank you, Rachel. Appreciate that. Parents will be proud of that.

[C]

You did stay on topic very much. I. I don't. I just feel like we need to let it breathe a little bit.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's when the fun comes out.

[B]

Not just hammer it.

[A]

God forbid we learn a thing or two on.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, great.

[A]

We are an educational podcast.

[C]

That's true.

[A]

Let's talk 10 movies about grocery stores.

[B]

I enjoyed it. I.

[A]

Let's all just start yelling out songs that are about grocery stores. I try to bring a little structure to this. Dude.

[B]

I enjoyed it. I. And I. And I like this comment. Everything about you being everything except about you being a Sunday school teacher.

[A]

Why don't you like that?

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

Yeah, we don't need you spreading that kind of stuff.

[A]

You don't need me spreading the world's biggest religion. Yeah.

[C]

I just realized we got. This is what we get. We got a Protestant, a Catholic, Jewish, and we all get along. When does Passover start?

[B]

Well, this year it's April 1st, which is what some people believe is the actual new year.

[C]

That makes sense. Yeah.

[B]

So it's April 1st. It's gonna be a good year. Mm. Don't celebrate April Fool's Day. Don't do that, guys.

[A]

So it's almost. Why not?

[B]

Well, because they.

[A]

Anybody celebrate?

[B]

Well, they don't even.

[A]

April Fool's Day.

[B]

They do. By participating.

[A]

You think just by, like, hey, playing

[C]

a prank, I throw a party.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's celebrating April.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Because they say it was the new year, and then when the calendar was moved, anybody that still celebrated the new year, they called them April Fools.

[A]

Interesting.

[C]

Last year.

[B]

So you're participating in the mocking.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You're being a mock.

[A]

Am I? If I'm not doing that, though.

[B]

If you're not doing it, then no.

[A]

Okay. But it might have been a premature knock right there. I'm saying if I'm playing a prank and I'm not thinking about that, I'm not calling anybody a fool.

[B]

But if you just love pranks, just do it. Any. Any day of the year, really.

[A]

Do it on April 2nd. Point.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Albert Bear Theater is haunted with a demon.

[A]

Yeah. That's a good.

[B]

Yeah. Do it in May.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just wait a month and then.

[B]

But still say April Fools.

[A]

May Fools.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Last year, Lucy had her. I guess it's been more than a year, but a baby shower here at Lab at Zany's.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

The wives all took a picture here on the set. While they were all here last year on April Fools, I posted on the Nateland Instagram coming this summer. Wifeland on April Fools.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It got way too serious, and I took it down after, like, five minutes.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Because people thought it was real.

[C]

I thought it was gonna be obvious. It's a joke.

[A]

Yeah, but.

[C]

But it wasn't.

[B]

So you pulled the plug too quick. Let him.

[C]

I got nervous.

[A]

Shame on you for celebrating April 4th.

[B]

Well, yeah. Cause there's no need to do it then. You could have done it anytime. Just played a prank.

[C]

But then once I did it, shame on me for pulling the plug on it.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, stick to.

[C]

Stick to my gun. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I just thought everybody would know. Think it's funny. But I can't wait for this. I'm like, oh, no, you should say,

[A]

Happy fourth of July in August.

[B]

Yeah. Well, the Fourth of July is basically a birthday, which I don't really celebrate. I don't really like to celebrate, You know, but.

[C]

Mike Sellers. Not sure how to word this without it sounding insulting to brand Muffin Bates. Well, you stop with that.

[A]

Yeah. Be a good first step. Yeah. Calling him by his name.

[C]

But Aaron should be in charge of running the show every episode. The grocery store episode was fire. Well, I actually love this.

[B]

It wasn't. It was a good episode. But, I mean, if he's doing it every week, does it Lose quality. Let's see.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Just give it a shot.

[A]

Whenever, five years. Whenever you want to break. Dude. Whenever you want to take a five year break. I don't know about five years, but every once in a while, if you need a little.

[C]

I suggest that we just. Each week we pick a topic, just rotate that we.

[B]

Well, let's see how mine goes.

[A]

Somebody. Somebody sent me a DM and goes, I enjoyed the episode, but not sure if it's the right dynamic. The dynamic is Brian brings the facts, Aaron tries to poke holes in it, and Dusty brings the funny.

[B]

Yes, exactly. Exactly.

[A]

Guys.

[C]

What?

[B]

I'd like to know that guy's name. That's somebody that finally gets how this podcast goes.

[C]

Dustin Ellslay.

[B]

All right, well, finally. Brand Muffin Bay. Not trying to be insulted. Brand muffin.

[C]

Kelly Lynn. Aaron, you sounded Reveal Revel. I don't know how to pronounce that. Taps is totally different.

[A]

Yeah, I messed up. I messed up the. The Bugle calls there.

[C]

You did the upbeat and taps.

[A]

Yeah, maybe I thought that's what Dusty meant, but this is. This is.

[C]

That's what you did.

[A]

That's what I thought it was. Yeah, but what actually they played was this.

[C]

Yeah, that's it. Very sad.

[A]

7.

[B]

Yes. That's the nighttime one. That's the night.

[C]

That's how they describe it.

[A]

Yeah, the nighttime one.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I was like, what's going on out here? Yeah.

[C]

Daniel Galvin. As for the Bugle, at funerals, I've been the guy who plays Taps. It's actually a little recording device with a speaker that fits in the end of the Bugle. You're supposed to face 45 degrees away from the crowd and then inauspiciously press the play button. Gets a little awkward when you can't find the button right away.

[B]

Yeah, well, that's enough, right?

[A]

Yeah, Well, I think I. Somebody like, told me to look for it or something.

[B]

Why are they not just doing it?

[A]

Because not everyone can play the Bugle.

[B]

You got one person, but for all

[A]

the funerals, this is. You know, my grandfather had been retired for the military for 40 years.

[B]

I don't know. I think there should be a Bugle guy.

[A]

I appreciate it. It's still a nice gesture.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Where's Alpha?

[A]

Any kind of instrument. Yeah, but, yeah, he wasn't flaunting that he wasn't doing it. I just noticed that he had a little box on there. Hit the button on it, you know. You don't like that?

[B]

No, I think it's.

[A]

Do you know anybody who plays the

[B]

Bugle no, but I don't know anybody. You know that Tristan's first at their funeral?

[C]

Yeah. Was Bigle boy, do you want to

[A]

have a funeral when you die?

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

Okay. Have you thought about that?

[C]

It's going to go long.

[A]

A lot of people think. The pastor is going to speak for 95 minutes now he's going to speak for three.

[C]

And the rest will be a video of Dusty talking pre recorded.

[A]

It's interesting. I find that some people don't think about the stuff at all and some people think about it a lot. I'm wondering, which one are you?

[B]

I don't think about it. Okay.

[A]

Okay. That's good. Do you, Brian, think about it more

[C]

and more each day?

[A]

Are we? I. I had a joke about it that never worked, but it's my buddy. My buddy was like, man, I've never. I've never been to a funeral, man. Isn't that crazy? 35. I've never been to a funeral. I was like, why haven't you gone? He goes, I just never got invited to one, dude. I go, I think you're supposed to just go, yeah. He's like, oh, that explains a lot, dude. He's like, man, I've had aunts and uncles I was kind of close with. I never got invited.

[C]

Is that based on Dusty?

[A]

No, but.

[C]

Because.

[A]

Didn't you say I hide that in because Dusty with your uncle?

[B]

Yeah, well, my.

[A]

You had a bit about it.

[B]

Well, I have, yeah. That I'm currently doing. But, yeah, I mean, we didn't know.

[C]

I thought you said once on this podcast that you've hardly been to any funerals because you haven't been invited.

[B]

Maybe I did and maybe this was news, you know, But I. This.

[A]

My. Yeah, this is my buddy that y' all know.

[B]

But maybe I did. Yeah, but I don't. Yeah. I mean, I'm just not a.

[C]

You're not a funeral guy. No, I've been to so many.

[B]

Have you? Yeah. High school friends. Just kidding.

[C]

A few.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, a few of my high school friends have died, too.

[C]

How have they died?

[B]

Various ways. Yeah.

[A]

Tragically, a lot of them.

[C]

I had a friend who died in college from a car wreck.

[A]

Huh.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

All right. That was fun.

[A]

Like comedy friends.

[B]

I mean, I could get into some of the ways, but I don't think you want that on here.

[C]

Comedy friends.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because they say, one comedy friend for me, I think. Yeah. I think I've had no one that I was super close with that I can think of, but people in my Orbit.

[B]

I had one guy, Clint Knorr out of North Carolina.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Still makes me sad. I love that guy.

[C]

I had one driving home from a show. Friend of my close friend of mine who's killed by drunk driver.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

And then Jake Gullage. You.

[A]

I never met him, but I know him through Henry. Joe.

[C]

Yeah, we both open for Henry a lot and he kind of passed away tragically, so.

[B]

Because you wanted all the gig. Sorry. My show, at my show in Orlando, the. The audience was so dark that I couldn't see the audience. And the urban crowd. At one point they. At one point they started to. People were chatting a little bit. I got something going on over here. And they go, we need a medic. We need a medic. And I go, oh. And so I go, I guess we need a medic down here. And then again, and I'm like, now I can't see what's going on. On.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know what to do. I'm just kind of standing there making jokes about somebody but trying not to make jokes about them, but also trying to keep the show going.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You can't lose them.

[B]

Vince told me I handled it poorly. Everybody else. Everybody else said, you did a great job handling that. Vince said, I would have told him, let's get some house lights in here. And I. I go, I think that's the worst idea. The guy's having an incident. And you go, let's get the house lights. Let's put a spotlight on this guy.

[A]

Did you figure out at any point was going on?

[B]

Yeah, they think it was alcohol edible diabetes related sort of thing.

[A]

The perfect store.

[B]

It was like, it's a little bit of everything.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And they said the guy was okay. Ended up being okay. But it's like, it's like, what are you doing at a show? Like, get it together.

[A]

It's one of those classic alcohol edible diabetes situations.

[C]

Tell as old as time. Well, I'm with Vince on this. Get. Not a spotlight. Get the house lights up so we

[A]

can put a spotlight on them right now.

[B]

But you think so you think if you were on stage and that happened, you would go, let's get some house lights.

[A]

It's hard to tell what to do in the moment because you don't know how serious it is. You don't know if it's some. You don't know what's going on.

[B]

And it's also like, if the theater wants the lights on, they'll turn the lights on. I don't know.

[A]

I don't know. If they will, though.

[B]

I don't run the theater. I wanted to be like, get this guy out of here. I got a show to do. My show builds to a certain place.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then I was in the midst of a joke that I really felt like it. The building of the show.

[A]

He's. He's convulsing on the ground. You are killing my momentum right now. I had a whole thing going.

[C]

Come on, dude.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Sold out show.

[A]

Could not have timed this worse.

[C]

Let's get Vince out here again.

[B]

And I go. And I said to the audience, I go, hey, for future reference, if somebody's needs a medic, just yell that out from the beginning. Don't just be chitter chatter around here. Right away.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Chastise the audience.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Vince might be on to something.

[A]

Y' all aren't handling this as fast as I'd like. Y' all gotta figure it out.

[B]

Yeah, let's get this guy out of here. Just carry him out of here. Don't even do. Get to the lobby and go, we need a medic.

[C]

Yeah. Nobody move him. No, move him.

[B]

Yeah. Any of a car accident, move him.

[A]

You can see me at the Orlando Improv in September.

[C]

Robert. Vinnie Lombardi.

[A]

Wow. You think this is a Lombardi Lombardi?

[B]

I don't think so.

[A]

You don't think so?

[C]

26 year retired air Force. Here for Dusty. The music heard Taps, which signals lights out in quiet hours. It's an opportunity for us to pause and reflect on our military sacrifices. The dude he saw running was probably an academy student who was late for curfew. And even seeing a public figure wasn't going to stop him from rushing back to his dorm and avoiding getting in trouble. Does that sound right?

[B]

I think he might have been, but I think he was a little older and I think he's been drinking. Okay, I gotta get in there.

[A]

And he had diabetes a little bit heavy.

[B]

Had to get to his edibles.

[C]

Well, thank you, Robert.

[B]

Yeah, thank you. And you made me wonder whatever Aaron's referencing about you being one of the Lombardies. He may be.

[A]

Yeah. Let us know. I don't. Is that a common name? I have no idea. I can only think of one Lombardi and it's Vince. It's almost like you're named after your great uncle Vince.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because your middle name's Vinnie and you

[B]

like to include the middle name on things.

[A]

Yeah, it's a little. They're letting us know.

[C]

Dan Bunnerfeld, since you all talked about Taps. My family member was the one who wrote Taps during The Civil War. He was a general during the war. I'm Nam. Named after the guy. Daniel Adams Butterfield. Dab Daniel also had an amazing. Has amazing mustache.

[A]

Look at that. That is an intense mustache.

[C]

So the guy wrote it is Butterfield, but this guy's Butterfield. Sounds like his parents lied to him.

[A]

It gets a little more German every few generations.

[B]

Well, it is an amazing mustache. And I bet he could play the bugle. Yeah, I bet he didn't push a button.

[C]

It's a lost art.

[B]

Well, that's really cool forehead on that guy too.

[A]

Yeah, he had a lot going on physically. That's awesome.

[B]

Gotta. You got a mustache above his eyes and he's got a. Look at that thing. They got two mustaches and no and no. No hairline.

[A]

Yeah, it'll swoop above the ears too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's an odd look, but I appreciate him writing that song,

[C]

Mike. Drost, Drost or grossed.

[B]

I'll see Drost like Frost. Robert Drost.

[A]

Two paths diverged. Remember that poem

[C]

I'm a pilot for? We talked about it during our poetry episode. I'm a pilot for a major airline. We never lie to the passengers. Okay.

[A]

Yeah, okay.

[C]

I pause for dusty. The policy is to keep them informed with facts. We are very proficient at our jobs and go through a ton of training just for these type of events. The captain should be relaying the information in a manner that inspires confidence, even if it sounds bad. Well, I appreciate that, Mike.

[A]

Isn't that kind of lying?

[C]

What do you mean by captain should

[A]

be relaying the information in a way that makes people feel good, even if it's bad news?

[B]

No, I mean, it's manipulation, I think.

[A]

Okay. But not full blown lying.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'd like to know what airline you work for, Mike. I'd like to know.

[C]

So you think just. Just that airline doesn't lie to the passengers? You think some. Maybe do.

[A]

I think they all. I think they lie in the way that parents go.

[B]

Hey, listen. Both of our engines have failed, but we feel pretty good about how we're gliding right now.

[A]

Confidence is long. You might notice a fireball outside the left side of the window. But confidence. We're. We're going to land. We're going to feel good about it. Oh, I recognize this name.

[C]

Julian Turnowicz. I still giggle when I hear Brian say poem in my head. But Aaron saying machinery used at a grocery store. And he said grocery like it has a ch, like in machinery. I don't know. That's not how we say machinery, but

[A]

machinery I work on a machine.

[C]

But then I heard y' all say both grocery and grocery. We. We say supermarket here, so I don't know what it is. He lives in Australia. He does.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So you don't even know how to pronounce our words.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So just grocery. Grocery. Like sir.

[A]

But I'll say grocery.

[C]

Yeah. I say, like, grocery.

[A]

Yeah. I'll throw an S in there. Grocery store.

[B]

My bad, Julian. I didn't know they were doing.

[A]

You never say grocery.

[B]

Grocery, groceries. I don't.

[A]

I don't throw some gro.

[B]

But we sit down, eat some groceries, we say sh.

[C]

And he's saying we say a ch.

[A]

Yeah. It means we. No. No way any of us are saying grocery stores.

[B]

Better go to the grocery store. Get that machine at the grocery

[A]

there. There's a fire. There's a vending machine at the.

[B]

I like them groceries.

[A]

How much you want?

[C]

Farm.

[A]

Me and mud biscuits.

[C]

How do you say it? Dusty?

[B]

Grocery.

[A]

You say grocery.

[B]

Grocery. Grocery.

[A]

And you say it so grocery store.

[B]

I don't know. Grocery store. Maybe that say that, too.

[C]

Well, glad we got the bottom of that.

[A]

It's the second you think about it too much, you're like, I don't even know what the real thing is anymore.

[C]

That is true, Aaron Romer. When I get a bad shopping cart at Walmart, I've been known to walk it over to the hardware department for a fix.

[A]

That's insane. That's insane behavior. You walk it all the way to the corner of the store and say, hey. You pull it up like it's a car getting an oil change.

[C]

I'll flip the cart over right there in the store aisle.

[A]

There's no way. There's no way this guy's ever done this.

[C]

Pull a wrench or ratchet off the shelf and fix the bad wheel. Even a hammer and mallet come in handy to straighten a bent cart. WD40 from the shelf works wonders to stop a squeak. If you're not going to maintain the cart, someone has to. Well, good for you.

[A]

This is insane.

[B]

It is insane. There's no way this guy's doing this.

[C]

He's just refusing to believe he's taking charge. Maybe we had more of this in America.

[B]

Well, good for you. Sure.

[A]

He uses their can of WD40 just off the show.

[B]

This guy should be arrested for shoplifting.

[A]

That's what he's doing. And he's writing this like, this is so routine. He's like, oh, well. Like, he does this every time he's at one.

[B]

Like Walmart's gonna be like, thank you, sir. Appreciate the help.

[C]

Look, well, he says he's been known to.

[A]

If you, if you do this, Aaron, just know I, I believe you. But I also believe you're the only person that's ever done this in the whole world.

[B]

Yeah, I believe that. And I bet he says grocery.

[C]

Well, he's not saying it like, come on, guys, everybody does this. I think he's saying I'm special. Yeah, I've been known to do this.

[A]

You know, maybe I put a lot into your tone of voice as you read it.

[C]

Oh, so it's my fault?

[A]

No, but I think a lot of my, my attitude, my response to it is the way that you read it. So if he, if he wrote it, like when I get a bad shopping cart at Walmart, I've been known to walk it over to the hardware department for a fix. But the way you said it, if he's.

[B]

That's ridiculous, nonchalant like that about it. That's worse to me.

[A]

No, but I'm saying maybe almost go in.

[B]

I'm not looking to do a repair on a cart, but if it needs it, I'll do it.

[A]

A little self awareness of like, I know it's a little crazy, but I, you know, I can get into it. I like to fix it. I'm a little, a handyman, you know.

[C]

I can't believe you're blaming me for.

[A]

I'm not blaming you for anything.

[C]

Out of control attitude. That was totally inappropriate. Just read your paper. You stopped me after every sentence. I'm like, just look ahead.

[A]

Keep going, man. Keep reading. Read the next one.

[C]

Amanda hugging kiss. Sorry. Amanda Surgeons remember that.

[A]

What is that?

[B]

No, I mean, I get the joke. A man to hug and kiss.

[A]

Oh, what is that from though?

[C]

Like, like the Simpsons. He would play like pranks. He would call. Is Amanda hugging kiss around here?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Ip, I'm looking for Amanda hugging kiss.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Chris P. Bacon. Remember all those IP Nightly.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

During that.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Amanda Sergens. I hate grocery shopping. When I go into the store, I get frustrated with people taking too long in an aisle and getting in my way. I spend too much money on things I don't need that weren't on my list. Etc. Instead, ever since COVID I use Walmart curbside pickup. I drive up, pop the trunk, and five minutes later my groceries are in my trunk and I'm on my way home.

[A]

This is an ad read for Walmart.

[C]

I'm trying to do it in a way that makes you not attack the fans.

[A]

Well, I use Promo code. Amanda. Surgeons for 20 off.

[B]

Amanda, I don't know how to tell you this, but they. Grocery stores will just deliver things. I mean, maybe you're way out in the country, but they'll just deliver it to your front steps. You don't even, don't you have to pay extra? A little bit, but.

[C]

Well, we don't all make figures money.

[B]

Yeah, but the gas to get to the Walmart. I mean, I think if you're like,

[A]

I'm driving home past the Walmart anyway, I might as well schedule an order pickup.

[C]

You both say the Walmart.

[A]

Yeah, if I'm, if I'm talking about the Walmart next to my house. But if I'm referring to all Walmarts, I don't go the Walmart.

[B]

I do. I like to say the Walmart. I like to say the Walmart.

[A]

How would you say what I just said?

[C]

I'm going to see the Eagles in concert. Is that right?

[A]

That is how you would say it, though the band name is technically just Eagles. Okay.

[C]

Do you know that?

[B]

I didn't know it. That's ridiculous.

[A]

But yeah. What do you mean?

[B]

Well, it's like your name's Eagle. Oh, I'm going to see Eagles. It's like, yeah, yeah, the Eagles.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's so pretentious. No, we're not Eagles. We're not the Eagles. We're Eagles.

[C]

So your sentence was you're not all the Eagles.

[A]

I'm saying if you're on the way home, maybe I'll just stop at the Walmart.

[C]

I think if I'd say, if I'm on my way home, I would stop at Walmart.

[A]

But it, I, I might say it like that too, but in my head

[C]

I'm thinking of, you were smart like me.

[A]

The specific Walmart location next to my house. I might stop at the Walmart by my house and get it.

[C]

Okay. Yeah. It was the way you said it that made me kind of turn.

[B]

The tone.

[C]

Yeah, the tone.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay, Josh. Mauer.

[B]

Mauer.

[C]

Brian's defeated. Look at. Dusty and Aaron are the best part of watching on YouTube. I see some meteor roles coming Brian's way once the breadwinner sweeps America. Well, thank you, Josh.

[A]

Hey, yo.

[B]

Appreciate it.

[A]

Meteor roles.

[B]

Meteor like in space.

[C]

Oh, I didn't get that. But I would love it. Thank you, Josh. Laura English I saw recently that Tom Hanks is not only a distant relative of Abraham Lincoln, but he's also set to portray Lincoln in a film adaptation of Lincoln in the Bardo, marking his first time playing a U.S. president.

[A]

All right, well, then can it. Can that be it?

[C]

Why do you hate Tom Hanks so much?

[B]

I like Tom Hanks, but I think it's a little suspect that he's playing, like, all the hero roles. He has a creepy Instagram and he plays all the hero roles.

[C]

What's his Instagram?

[B]

For a long time, he was just taking pictures of a child's glove or a shoe, and it would make some joke. Oh, I guess the kid lost his shoe. And it was a lot of that. And it's like, all right, buddy, like, why are you finding all these loose articles of clothing laying around?

[C]

I've never heard that.

[B]

Yeah, I. But I like him. I'm a big fan of Forrest Gump.

[A]

Great actor.

[B]

Yeah. Huh?

[A]

I'm sure he'll be great as Abraham Lincoln, but it's just.

[B]

But I'll never see it.

[A]

It's almost like he's. He's going, what else is there for me? He's going to play God in the movie next.

[C]

Well, Steve Carell did that, right?

[A]

Morgan Freeman.

[C]

Morgan Freeman.

[B]

Steve Carell was Noah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Great movie. Did you like that movie?

[A]

Evan Almighty. Yeah. Bruce Almighty.

[B]

It was Evan Almighty. He was a character out of Bruce Almighty, but Bruce Almighty was funny. Evan Almighty, I thought, had a good overall, good moral to it. Okay, well, you know, I don't know. You got to watch the movie. But it was, you know, he's basically playing Noah and he's set to build an ark, and everybody's making fun of him and is. I don't know. I thought it was a good. Okay, good story.

[C]

Yeah. And he's not literally being Noah, so therefore, that didn't bother you.

[B]

Right.

[C]

Like, they're not saying.

[B]

It wouldn't bother me if there were a portrayal of Noah, an accurate one, but, you know, the weird Russell Crowe

[C]

one was a little extreme. Oh, I didn't think you wanted biblical characters portrayed.

[B]

No, as long as it's not Jesus, you know, and. Well, I don't really like Morgan Freeman playing God. I don't want any God characters.

[A]

So when I. If I read the Bible, is it bad to imagine what. What I'm reading in my head as I read it?

[B]

No, I think imagining is okay as long as you don't draw it and then go, this is God.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[A]

Not really, but.

[B]

Yeah. You don't understand the idea of creating an image and going, this is God.

[A]

Who's doing that? Who's going? This is definitively what he looked like.

[B]

Well, lots of people.

[C]

Well, like the movie Morgan Freeman would be the image.

[B]

Even people that created the Golden Calf.

[A]

Do you think somebody watching that goes, oh, they're saying God looks exactly like Morgan Freeman?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

I'm not saying that about that movie, but to act like that doesn't exist. I mean, of course people have a picture of Jesus hanging in their house, and we have no idea what he looks like. And they, you know, they may not say this is exactly what he looks like, but it's their depiction. They reference it as Jesus. For sure. They do, for sure.

[A]

I just don't. I don't. I don't understand the harm in that at all.

[B]

Well, you're creating an image, and we're commanded to not create an image of God.

[A]

Where did you say you can't draw a picture of what you think Jesus might have looked like?

[B]

Yeah, where does it say. It says thou shalt? It's in the Ten Commandments. Thou shalt not create an image.

[A]

What? What. Which one is that? You're talking about the First Commandment. Thou shalt have no other gods before me.

[B]

Well, I think you're. I mean, it says thou shalt not create an image, so.

[C]

Might have been graven image.

[B]

Well, that's. That's. What Bible.

[A]

What are you talking about? The Ten Commandments. Thou shalt not create an image.

[C]

Isn't one of them a graven image?

[B]

Yeah, I mean, you know, you could pull it up, but it's, you know, but it. I mean, for sure is.

[C]

His kids might be all right, though.

[B]

Whose kids?

[C]

God's.

[B]

Well, no one. I don't think anyone has ever seen God.

[C]

You looked at Wikipedia for the Ten Commandments?

[A]

Yeah, because I want some context.

[B]

But for sure, it's in there. I mean, we're not supposed to create an image because we don't know what God looks like. So your inclination is to worship the image when the.

[A]

Do you think if I watch Passion of the Christ, I'm worshiping Jim Caviezel?

[B]

I think that it sets an image in your head of what Jesus would have looked like. And what if he looks completely different than that?

[A]

Then that wouldn't matter at all.

[B]

But you might be a little thrown off. You're looking for one thing and,

[C]

like,

[A]

what do you have thrown off? Because he doesn't look like the actor that plays him.

[C]

You ever watched a biopic and you really get into it and, like, this guy's great, and then at the end they show the real guy and you're like, yeah.

[A]

You're like, it's not even close.

[C]

Yeah, right. That guy's ugly.

[B]

So, I mean, it's the same sort of thing. And so you're.

[A]

But I'm not like, oh, man, they should have never made this movie because he didn't look like him.

[B]

Well, I'm not. Yeah, well, I mean, that's your take. But I. But, yeah. I mean,

[C]

did you find it?

[A]

Yeah. I don't. Yeah. I mean. Yeah. Thou shalt not. This is from Exodus 24: through 6, King James Version. So take it with a salt lick. Thou shalt not make unto the. Any graven image or any likeness of. Of anything that is in heaven above. What does a graven image mean?

[C]

Like a chisel, I think. Like they were making golden calves and stuff.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Thou shalt not bow down. Yeah. Yeah. I am the Lord before. Okay. Okay.

[B]

So that's what I'm saying.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So Tom Hank should not play Lincoln. That's what we.

[A]

I think that's in a roundabout way. That's what we're saying. We're saying, make Forrest Gump 2 stop doing all this other nonsense.

[C]

Well, I mean, Daniel Day Lewis, I think, won an Oscar for playing Lincoln, so.

[B]

Well.

[A]

He was so good in that.

[C]

I know. I was just saying that's a real task to take on a role after.

[B]

Yeah. There's not. Yeah. I mean, there's nothing wrong with playing Lincoln. And Daniel Day Lewis is great.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Better than Tom Hanks, I think. And for those type of characters.

[A]

Is this a widely held belief that it's bad to portray Jesus? I know Muhammad is talked about that way, but I haven't. I haven't heard this that often about Jesus. Do you know if it's a common thing. I'm just naive. To which I'm.

[B]

I don't know what other people believe, but I just read that and I go, all right, well, we shouldn't be doing that, so let's don't do that.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I mean, I watch. I watch the Chosen, and I like it. So.

[A]

Yeah. So I guess it probably doesn't look like him, though.

[B]

We don't know.

[A]

Yeah, we don't know exactly. That's the problem.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because then you're gonna see Jesus one day and you'll be like, you don't. Looks like the act.

[C]

I'm out of here.

[B]

I don't think it's like that. I think that you don't. You know, you're like you. It gets ingrained in your mind what you're looking for, whereas you shouldn't be. I mean, you can imagine it. But to put it down and say, this is it. And I think that's what they're doing.

[A]

They're going, this is it.

[B]

This is what he looked like. This is what we think he.

[A]

Who cares what he looks like?

[B]

I just think it matters. I mean, obviously we shouldn't be doing it.

[C]

I always thought graven images were like things you're worshiping other than God, like a golden calf or something.

[B]

But in the golden calf, even in that time, they were not saying that it wasn't God. They're saying this is God. They're saying this is the God. This is the one that set us free from Egypt. So they just. It's the need to have a physical thing rather than the unseen God.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

All right. So you got a lot of work to do.

[A]

Yeah, man. A lot of statues and pictures and stuff that need to come down.

[C]

I know. We'll get on it. We'll wait.

[A]

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[C]

Sports. Sorry. Sport shorts.

[A]

Sport shorts.

[C]

Oh, Tom Hanks.

[A]

By the way you say sports shorts, I think about. Remember those little umbro shorts?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Soccer shorts.

[B]

Shouldn't wear those either.

[A]

I agree with that.

[C]

Common ground. We. Before we get our topic, Tom Hanks, can you name a western?

[B]

Toy story.

[A]

Can I name a western?

[C]

I thought I'd start easy.

[A]

Here comes Woody's roundup.

[B]

All right.

[C]

What do you think about that?

[A]

Yeah, I've done. I've done the Opry with those guys. The writers in the sky. Yeah, like 10 times. Maybe they're always on with.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

What do they do? I mean, they.

[A]

They did the soundtrack to Toy Story.

[C]

Really?

[A]

All the western stuff is.

[C]

Huh.

[A]

Here goes Woody's round.

[C]

All right, I forgot about Woody. But an actual movie.

[A]

Can I name an actual Western? True Grit.

[C]

That Tom Hanks was in that. I know, I did say.

[A]

Now, there was a movie called where he plays a guy who reads the newspaper to people that can't read.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What is that movie called?

[C]

Something around the World.

[A]

Yeah. Do you know. Do you know that used to be a job

[B]

when you were on here?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, that movie. He would go around to these towns where nobody could read and read the paper to him.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And that was his whole job.

[B]

That's cool.

[A]

Isn't that cool? Yeah. Still a few places.

[C]

News of the World. Was that it?

[A]

Yeah, Something like.

[C]

Something like that.

[A]

Yeah. More of the world or something.

[C]

Sport shorts. I just saw a movie called Urban Cowboy.

[A]

Nice.

[C]

With John Travolta and Charlie. Daniel Daniels. I can't say it was a good movie, but it was definitely entertaining. Well, I would agree with you, Sports Shorts. I think it's a good movie, but maybe I'm just more entertaining. Charlie Daniels. You haven't seen it, right? Dusty.

[B]

It's been a long time. I watched it when I was a kid.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And I own it. And I've been meaning to watch it, but I got a lot. I've been watching a lot of movies.

[C]

Yeah. Charlie Daniels is in the very end. I mean, he just sings.

[B]

I think he's in the very beginning, too.

[C]

He might be when they first go to Gillies.

[A]

So he's not an actor in the movie?

[C]

No, he's just performing.

[B]

Yeah, he's in the bar.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Looking big. This is big. It was big. Charlie Daniels.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What do you think the best musician slash actor is of all time? The guy who can do both and good at both. Yeah, good at both. I think a lot of people try to do both.

[C]

There's a lot of actors who have a band on the side.

[A]

I got two. I'm thinking of Jerry Reed. I don't know. Jerry Reed.

[C]

Jerry Reed, yeah.

[B]

Jerry Reed is the. Is the. He's the bad coach and water boy. He's.

[C]

He's the truck driver and smoking. The bandit.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Burt Reynolds, buddy.

[A]

Oh, man. He's been a lot of stuff. Yeah, I love that. I was thinking, surprisingly good actor. Ludicrous.

[C]

Ludicrous.

[A]

The rapper? Yeah.

[B]

I. I've not seen Ludicrous in a lot of stuff.

[A]

He's pretty good. I Watched Crash recently.

[B]

I watched Crash.

[A]

He's good in Crash.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then the other one I want to throw out there, Jamie Foxx. Yeah. Unbelievable musician, very good comedian and incredible actor.

[B]

Yeah, he is very talented, but I'm like. Like, you know, like, when I think about it, like, Jerry Reed, accomplished musician who then later. And then was an actor who also had a lot of acting credits. Kris Kristofferson did pretty good at that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm sure.

[A]

I'm forgetting some Lady Gaga.

[C]

Lady Gaga was nominated.

[B]

I think she's did. Yeah. I mean. Yeah, it's fair. I mean, Hugh Jackman, he's a great singer. He's a Broadway. Broadway performance.

[A]

Oh, yeah, Broadway.

[B]

So he did Les Mis. Right.

[C]

He's done a couple of movies. Yeah, he's in a movie now where he sings. It's a Neil Diamond.

[B]

You wouldn't. You don't have a Hugh Jackman album in your car. Yeah, but like Patrick Suy, you know, he was an actor and then he had that song, she's like the Wind.

[A]

I don't remember that. Yeah, sounds terrible.

[B]

Andy Griffith could do a little bit.

[A]

Andy Griffith. Andy Griffith was great.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Prince, Purple Rain. But he wasn't a good actor.

[A]

Yeah. You know who's real? Eminem. Yeah, he's a good actor. He's playing a fictionalized version of himself.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

He should. I. I think he should do more stuff. I think he should.

[B]

He was in Happy Gilmore, too, in real life.

[C]

He lived on Seven Mile. It's pretty close to him. He was in. Yeah, he wasn't Happy Gilmore, too, but a real role.

[A]

I think he could knock it out. Park Elvis, I guess.

[B]

I don't think people liked his acting. Like, women loved it, but I think they were like, he, you know, he was a musician, and then he started doing all the movies and they felt like it was like killing his career. And then he went back to Vegas.

[A]

Oh, you're about to get attacked by everybody.

[B]

You think so?

[A]

I think that's. That's as scathing as what I said about his.

[B]

I don't think anybody talks about Elvis's movies and goes, gosh, have you ever seen this? Hawaii trip to Hawaii with Elvis.

[A]

Honolulu, whatever. Yeah.

[C]

Eddie Murphy in either Raw or Delirious had a very funny joke about it.

[A]

What was the joke? Where he would just basically say it word for word.

[C]

That's for Nateland After Dark.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But he's basically making fun of Elvis. Like, he basically just sang his lines like, I can't remember now, but it was like, what is It.

[B]

It was just romance novels for women that didn't want to read.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's what Elvis movies are.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. You know, he's like the Fabio, but he's. He's live action.

[A]

Who's Fabio? Moneyball.

[C]

Yeah. That's great. Those are. Those are real guys. They weren't actors.

[A]

Oh, really? They were real scouts.

[C]

I don't know if they were scouts, but I think they were real scouts. I looked up Cher.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Cher's one.

[A]

Cher's really good.

[C]

Barbra Streisand.

[A]

I watched a movie where Cher plays a. An attorney. She was surprisingly good.

[B]

All right, I brought a laptop today.

[C]

Whoa.

[B]

This is my own.

[C]

I got one more.

[B]

Do you guys know you want to

[A]

plug in and show the screen?

[B]

No. Okay.

[A]

It's just for you.

[B]

Absolutely.

[C]

What's that on your laptop? Oh, it's a mushroom.

[B]

Me and my wife, we bought the exact same laptop, and then I needed to do some writing and I left, and I accidentally grabbed her laptop so I couldn't do anything. So I put a little sticker on here that I just found laying around the house. I'm not against it.

[A]

Yellow mushroom.

[B]

Just a little mushroom.

[C]

There's Aaron. I got one more while he's doing that.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Will Smith.

[A]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[B]

Will. Well, I mean, I'm into it. I mean, fantastic actor. And the old. Like that early album. I like to get jiggy with it. Miami.

[A]

First rap album, never went to Grammy.

[C]

Is that right?

[B]

I was into it back in the day, but he's really fallen off on the musical.

[C]

Well, today we're talking about Westerns.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Dusty's leading the charge. And it's time for our favorite segment. What's in the Box?

[A]

All right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, what is in the box? We've got a couple oddly shaped packages here with ebay. This one's from. His name is crossed out, so I won't read that, but this one's coming to you from Dodge City, Kansas.

[C]

Mine's coming from Tintype Fine Art Studio in Danville, Pennsylvania. Oh, Dodge City, Kansas. That's seems authentic.

[A]

Yeah. What's going on in Dodge City? Is that a Western town?

[B]

Yeah, there's some westerns that take.

[C]

That's not a good start, Aaron.

[A]

What do you mean you don't know

[C]

Dodge City is a Western town?

[A]

Well, this is my role. I'm the guy who doesn't know anything.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And Dusty's supposed to bring the funny any second now. It'll happen.

[B]

Yeah, like I wrote it. Okay. This is the good, the bad, the Ugly post.

[A]

Oh, that's really cool.

[B]

Which I actually like those. I'd love to take this home. But that was one of the names

[A]

we threw out for this podcast. I've got a. I've got a poster as well.

[B]

That's a good poster.

[C]

All right. Can I start? I guess you've already started, but this

[A]

is wrapped like it's biohazard.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

Am I supposed to be waiting on you? No, but I thought it was whoever could get the package open first.

[A]

It did feel like a bit of a race, and I'm sad I lost.

[B]

So you had the knife.

[C]

Tristan, tell me if I. I do have a knife.

[A]

I have a.

[C]

A Billy the Kid. Yeah. That's a tin type. What? It was a tin type. So tin type is like another way that they would take a photograph back then. They use a piece of aluminum and they treat it with some chemicals. Yeah. And then they'll put it and expose it with a lens in front of it for a minute, up to an hour, and let the image soak into that. And then they'll wash it off with other chemicals in a dark room and it comes out with that image.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

So that's not. Yeah, that's even more.

[A]

What year is that one from?

[C]

Well, I don't know, but I think that's one of the more famous copies of Billy the Kid. It's like a. Been passed around a lot. Yeah. Adrian sent me a news article. They just found us in like, a garage sale.

[B]

Something.

[C]

Another photo of Billy the Kid just in some random. Never been seen before. He's playing crochet. Croquet.

[B]

Playing crochet.

[A]

No, that's what I call it. Yes. Croquet or crush.

[C]

Yeah, I don't know.

[A]

I knew exactly what you meant.

[C]

He was crocheting.

[A]

He's hitting a ball through a thing.

[C]

He's in a ball through the thing. I'd be. If he's crocheting it. Probably be worth more. It's a whole side of Billy the Kid they didn't know about. But they value at $5 million. This photo that was found at like an auction or something.

[B]

Wow. 5 million.

[C]

Does it look like he's left handed in that photo or right hand? Well, all right. So his. He's holding the barrel of his gun with his right hand. Okay.

[B]

So that one might be corrected.

[C]

A lot of the original tin types were a mirror image. Kind of like how. If you took it. So that makes sense. So he's probably right handed.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So I think they corrected that one on the original Ones it would look like he was left. Oh, I see.

[A]

Could he have anticipated it being mirrored and he put it in the other hand?

[C]

Probably. He was Billy the Kid.

[A]

I've got a poster here for Stagecoach, the movie with. Directed by John Ford, starring John Wayne.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I just bought that one. I've never seen it, but I just bought it.

[A]

It says a powerful story of stuff, nine strange people.

[B]

Stay tuned for Western Part 2, because I got about 50 more movies to watch.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Stage Coach was the movie that made

[B]

John Wayne take off.

[C]

It's kind of what gave him his star status. All right. Yeah, I've heard of it. I've never watched it. What do you got, Dusty?

[B]

Oh, I have the good, the bad. The editor in these books I don't read, but

[C]

finish strong there.

[B]

Well, I mean, I don't know what these are, but.

[C]

Well, Tristan can tell us.

[B]

This is Auburn. Oh, is this Auburn, Alabama?

[C]

Those are gold rush mining instruction guides.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

So those were.

[C]

Those were essentially hiding.

[B]

Oh, Auburn, California.

[C]

Those were made to get people to go move out west and start looking at my notes in there.

[B]

It's okay.

[C]

You don't need them. We don't need them.

[B]

All right.

[C]

He says we don't need them. I'm just gonna sit back.

[B]

We got 40 minutes. We don't need them.

[A]

All right.

[B]

I mean, it is.

[C]

If you guys predict in five minutes he's going to say, go.

[B]

If you guys can talk about a

[C]

Western, well, we'll see. Let's go.

[A]

I have a lot of questions. Do you want me to. How do you want me to approach this? Just let you go, or do you. Or do you welcome. A little join in?

[B]

I want you to, you know, join in and participate and be a part of it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know.

[A]

Well, yeah, I'm. Yeah.

[C]

Unlike a lot of weeks where you just check out.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

All right. So I like Westerns, right. So I'm always watching them on my own. I grew up watching westerns. My dad watches Westerns all the time. I've been. I've been just inundated with Westerns. I used to. I used to read a little bit before I got a smartphone. I would read a little bit. I read some Louis Lamar books. Familiar with those?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I didn't even think about that when I was writing this Louis Lamar books. I read a couple, but once you read a few, you're kind of like, oh, this is kind of the same thing over and over again. And the same with Westerns, the movies, but they all got a different little thing to Them. You ever read a Louis Lamar book? I haven't.

[C]

I'm familiar. I have it.

[A]

It's mentioned in the Shawshank Redemption.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Oh, you have the library. Yeah, they want some with Brooks.

[A]

We got a new stack of Louis Lamore.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah, those are exciting. And then I found. I got. I watched a Sam Elliott movie, Conagher. Okay. Where he played. It was a Lou Lamar book.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Low budget, probably made for TV movie, but pretty good. This is what I like about Westerns. Usually most Westerns, there's a clear good guy and a clear bad guy. Right. So, yeah. And then, and then the. Oh, the, the old Westerns especially, there's no redeemable characteristics to the bad guy. Right. The good guy might have some questionable morals here and there, but overall he's going to do the right thing. So the bad guy, they make him so bad that when he's like brutally killed later, you. You like it?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You don't mind what they do to the guy. You don't have any sympathy for him. That's fun. That's why I don't like these movies where. And there's a couple of Westerns that do this, but more modern day where like at the end the lead dies, but, you know, it's a win for his family. I don't like that. Like, let's let the good guy win, right. You know, life is full of moments where the good guy doesn't win. Let's. If we're gonna fantasize about it, let's fantasize about the good guy winning. You know, Clint Eastwood, Westerns almost all fall into this category. Most of these movies, you don't ask yourself, is he going to be able to pull it off. You just wonder how he's gonna do it.

[A]

Yeah, you're just along for the ride, right?

[B]

This one is Good, the Bad, the Ugly I've not watched recently, so I'm not as familiar. But the opening scene to Good the Bad the Ugly might be the best opening.

[C]

The famous whistle and the. The.

[B]

Well, there is a. I think. So there is another movie. This is Sergio Leone, movie director. He also did Once Upon a Time in the West.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And actual Charles Bronson has a harmonica, so he's doing a thing. That's my second favorite opening.

[A]

It says that this movie, Leone is known for his juxtaposition of expansive wide shots and extreme close ups, as well as a highly stylized treatment of violence, tension and gunfight. So this is kind of the prototype of a classic western movie, right?

[B]

Yeah. And I want. They call them spaghetti Westerns, which. I don't like that term. That seems silly.

[A]

It's one of the great roast jokes of all time at the James Franco Roast. Who. Jeff Ross said it about Jonah Hill when he said Tarantino asked Jonah Hill if he wanted to be in a spaghetti Western. And Jonah said, you had me at spaghetti. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know. I don't know where the term comes from. Maybe you look that up, but I'm not. I'm not into that term, but I. If you. I don't know if you. I wanted to put together. I didn't do it, but I wanted to edit together a highlight of a lot of these characters from these movies. They're all real gritty and dirty and sweaty, and they're the five o' clock shadows. And it just. It just feels like, you know, they've really been out there in it.

[A]

Yeah. It's funny that you say you don't like spaghetti western. And I. I looked.

[B]

I.

[A]

First of all, I didn't know spaghetti Western just meant it's Italian guys making.

[C]

Yeah, that's feel.

[A]

It feels way different. I don't know.

[C]

Although Django Unchained is consider spaghetti Western.

[A]

Spaghetti Western, yeah. It said they are focused on morally ambiguous characters, which is what you just talked about, that you don't really like in these movies. So that totally makes sense.

[B]

The. Yeah, the. The lead can ha. You know, he can be, like, morally questionable, but you still know he's gonna save the day. You don't get so caught up in his morals because he's. The bad guy is so bad that even if the good guy does something, you know, where you're like, I don't know about that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're still like, well, it's not as bad as the other guy. And then I. I like. The older Westerns are cinematically very pleasing. There's a lot of great landscape shots. You're just seeing what the old west might have been like before it was settled. A lot of these movies, like Once Upon a Time in the West, I mean, that whole movie is about the train is coming through and everybody's trying to get ready to build a good. Either building a good station to have a good town for when the train comes through. So people are fighting over that land.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Westerns give you a taste of what it might have actually been like to live out west during this time. I don't know, obviously, but usually it's between 1865 and 1900. Okay. So post Civil War. But before, you know, they just. The country was kind of in shambles and there's a lot of men that were trained militarily, but now no work and probably a lot of undiagnosed ptsd.

[A]

Yeah. A lot of people coming out of the Civil War.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Going, let's just go west into the. The great unknown for them. Right?

[B]

Yeah. Maybe my town was burned down, my family was killed. Let's go do like, I think Jeremiah Johnson. I think it was Civil War or after that movie, he was like, I hate what just happened and I'm just gonna live in the mountains.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it's debatable if that's considered a Western. But I love Jeremiah.

[A]

Well, that's the one thing I wanted to ask you about because I think there are a lot of movies that I like that aren't in the Wild west, that, that don't involve cowboys and sheriffs, but they feel like Westerns to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm wondering what that is exactly. Like, what is it about a movie that makes it a Western?

[C]

Is it modern day stuff?

[A]

I'm thinking about like Inglourious Basterds. That movie. It's about World War II and it feels like a Western to me. Is that crazy?

[B]

Well, I think it's. Cause like, Brad Pitt has this crazy accent and they're just kind of like. It's kind of like a tombstone type movie where it's like a. A group of marshals have come in to rid the town of its bad guys.

[C]

Right.

[A]

So the themes are basically the same.

[B]

I think so.

[A]

Different, different setting.

[B]

Well, I got a thing here. But I say you. I also, you know, I think it makes me think of these times, like when. Where people were living. It's like, it was hard, but it was filled with, you know, your whole day. Like we live in this, this day and age where we like, we can get. Pick up food on the way home and then go home and eat food in front of the tv. And we're like, sad if we don't have enough time to binge four or five episodes. Whereas their whole day was filled, filled, meeting their needs. Seeds. Like they're growing food or wrangling cattle, washing clothes, hunting, building a house or defending your house, you know, so they probably didn't have a lot of anxiety back then because you were just like, I got stuff to do.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Didn't have time.

[B]

And they're getting plenty of sunlight, probably grounding a lot. You know, could you imagine like spending your. Like, you see this in these movies, but spend Your entire childhood alone, you know, with your family out on some ranch. And then when you're, you know, a teenager, your dad takes you to town.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It'd be wild.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, that's a little bit like you coming into Nashville from Lebanon, Right?

[C]

A little bit. A little bit.

[B]

And.

[C]

Or.

[B]

Or imagine, like, you're a cowboy and you're riding your horse through the desert just by yourself.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And you stop, you know, you're. You build a fire. You just look up at the stars. There's no phone to look at. Yeah.

[C]

There's some Indians, maybe.

[A]

Sounds a little lonely, though.

[B]

It sounds lonely, but I think because we're so accustomed to being around so many people.

[A]

Yeah, but do you think a lot of this. Like, I like to romanticize it, too, but then you think about the reality of it, of packing up the stuff, putting it on there, putting it on the horse that have. I mean, and then it's. I'm glad I'm where I am now.

[B]

I think it's great. I think if gas prices keep going up, I may get a horse and I may ride it around the neighborhood.

[A]

I love that.

[C]

Right into this podcast.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, with this podcast would be. That'd be a bit of a haul. That'd be a day's trip.

[A]

A little room in here.

[B]

Yeah. But I. I like the idea of packing up the saddlebags, putting my shotgun or rifle there in the holster.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I like. I think TV and movies are better now than they've ever been. I know you disagree with that.

[A]

The golden age, they say.

[C]

But I do think.

[A]

But we've got all the stuff that you like, plus all the new stuff being made.

[C]

I think that.

[A]

I mean, we literally do.

[B]

The stories are not as good to

[A]

me, but we still have access to all the old stuff.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm just saying, the stuff made today, the stories are not as good. Good.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I think there's layers. I think everybody's got some good and some bad in them. So there's.

[B]

True with that.

[C]

But you don't think you have good and bad in you?

[B]

No, I do, but I don't think everybody does.

[C]

What are you talking about?

[B]

I think some people are all bad.

[A]

You think some people are all good?

[B]

No.

[C]

Okay. All right, that. All right, that's fair. But. So I do like shows that have layers.

[A]

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[C]

I do enjoy watching old westerns for the reason you just said. Because everything is so complicated now and it is kind of refreshing just to go watch a simple, not simple movie or show. But you know, the good guy's good, the bad guy's bad and it's, it's

[A]

kind of refreshing, formulaic in a good way. Or you just know what's going to happen.

[B]

Well, you know, ultimately how it's going to end, but you don't know what's going to happen.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

How, like why? You know, I watch Colombo too. Obviously not a western, but you know, Colombo is going to figure it out. People say that to me. They go, oh, he's always right. And I go, can you imagine an episode, episode where Columbo goes, couldn't figure it out? Well, it would be.

[A]

I think it's throw one of those.

[C]

Yeah, but, but like I watch Gunsmoke and Bonanza. I like watch those reruns. I watch them as a kid and they still hold up to me because yes, the good guy, you know, Gun

[B]

smoke, that's where Toby Keith should have been a cowboy is based off of. Really. I bet you you know Marshall, Dylan, Miss Kitty. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Dodge City, Kansas.

[B]

That's Gun. That's Gunsmoke. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. And longest running show I think until the Simpsons.

[B]

But I think about this. You ever driving around and you like especially around Tennessee and you just look at all the mountains that are around here and then you think what would this have been like with no people? Can you imagine riding your horse.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Into this just vast area and just being like, wow.

[C]

I know.

[B]

And that's What. I think that's what's so good about these movies. You know, they didn't spend their whole lives just being entertained.

[C]

I do think that when I watch these movies, but the. I don't. They. There's Westerns for a reason. They're set out west. It's. I don't even know why that is. But there's rarely a movie that's set on this side of the country from that genre.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, I guess like a Gangs of New York might be that

[C]

sort of movie movie, I guess. Yeah. But that was set 1900s, right?

[B]

Yeah, because it was, you know. Yeah. I mean, but it was settled faster. But 1900s, that's still in the. In the realm. All right, so my favorite directors, I. I meant to make a whole category, but then I realized that there's only one director that I could find that did a lot of movies that. Sergio Leone. He did the. He did the four Clint Eastwood movies. I think it was four. He did Fistful of Dollars, Few Dollars More, the Good, the Bad, the Ugly. Those were his three Clint Eastwood movies. And then he had Once Upon a Time in the West. And then another one that I just found I didn't want. I have not watched it, called A Fistful of Dynamite, but I have ordered it and ever heard of that one?

[A]

There's Fistful of Dollars, too.

[B]

Fistful of Dollars, Few Dollars More. The Good, the Bad, the Ugly, that's the Clint East.

[C]

Those are classic westerns.

[B]

I just watched all of those. Well, I didn't just watch the Good, the Bad, the Ugly. It's been a while. But he didn't do Pale Rider, he did Pale. Sergio Leone did not. Yeah, but. Because they, you know, there's the others. There's Hang Em High, which I just watched. Very good. Gruesome, but very good. And then Pale Rider and then the Outlaw Josie Wales, which is one of the best westerns there is.

[A]

Yeah, I've seen that one. It's been a long time, but I remember seeing it.

[B]

It's unbelievable. Yeah. So then you have Clint Eastwood, then becomes a director, and he directs and stars in Unforgiven.

[C]

Now we're talking.

[B]

Which. I think it was the perfect movie to end Clint Eastwood's Western career, because in the movie he's basically playing a former gunfighter, a guy that used to go save the day.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now he's old, he's retired, he's farming with his kids, and, you know, his friend or somebody sends word to him to come and help. Help save the town.

[C]

Yeah, that Movie they said changed westerns forever because it was one of the first that did exactly what Dusty doesn't like it make complicated the characters where the good guys weren't all good. I mean, he's the good guy, but he's. He was not the guy who used to go save the day. He killed women and children.

[A]

It said the anti hero.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, who knows? I. We don't know the guy's past, but the bad guy, even though he's, you know, like the sheriff of the town or whatever. Gene Hackman. Yeah. It's clearly a bad guy. Yeah. They leave it to where there's nothing redeemable about him.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Whereas Clint Eastwood, like I say he may have some moral issues, but they've reached out to him to save the day. Day to save the town. And then he gets his friend Morgan Freeman and they roll into town, you know, to save the day. And I think it's great.

[C]

I think it's great too. I thought.

[B]

And my. My was told that the director or writer of that movie reached out to Clint Eastwood years before and asked him to do this movie. And he said, I want to do it, but now's not the time.

[C]

He wanted to be older.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why do you think that this. Because people stop making westerns for after a while.

[B]

Right.

[A]

What was kind of the heyday of when all these movies were coming out?

[C]

I feel like the 50s and 60s.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know about that.

[A]

50s, 60s, 70s.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And then it just kind of. I mean, there's an occasional one, but it definitely doesn't dominate no movies like it. Did you think we just get tired of stuff?

[B]

I think that they had movie ranches. So they would just have these ranches out in California that are just in Arizona and Utah just set up for it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So you could just keep.

[A]

Just churn them out.

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

But I mean, maybe tape some other stuff out there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

A storyline.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

You mean moon landing.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then. Well, you got something?

[C]

I was just going to say in Unforgiven, part of the storyline, the. It's not the main storyline of the movie, but part of the conflict is no guns allowed in town.

[A]

Oh.

[C]

And that was the town ordinance. The O.K. corral, tombstone. That was what they fought over. No guns allowed in city limits. So you think that everybody was just carrying a gun and maybe they were for the most part. But there's two movies where that was the conflict or at least part of it. Was no gun.

[A]

They're banning guns in the city.

[C]

That would be. I was trying to. What would that be?

[B]

I think that, you know, at least in the case of Tombstone, it had gotten so out of control that they were like, all right, we gotta enforce something because keep having these gunfights.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So we gotta do something.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I was thinking, what would that be today? That would be equivalent to no cell phones allowed.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

In a place.

[B]

We'd have to get their. Yonder.

[C]

The yonder bag. Put all of your guns in a underbag.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's so funny. You know, we worry about our screen time now. They're, like, probably worried about their gun time.

[B]

Well, there is a song. I've included it in my list. But there's a song by Johnny Cash called don't take your guns to town. And that's about, like this. You know, this mom is talking to her son, Billy Joe, and he's saying. He's. She's like, all right, you're going to town, but don't take your gun. It's wild there. And you're going to invite conflict if you take your gun.

[A]

Or what about just take your gun and conceal it?

[B]

Yeah, maybe. I mean, I don't think it really gets that into it.

[A]

It's not as catchy.

[B]

But I think the idea is don't take it on your hip.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Don't wear it. Don't wear it on your hip.

[A]

Right, right.

[B]

Because I think you're inviting. Because there was. Seemed to be a lot of moments where if, like, you were disrespected, you could challenge someone right there to.

[A]

This town ain't big enough.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it was. I really, apparently, really happened.

[A]

What does that expression come from? This town ain't big enough for the two of us.

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't know the origin of it.

[A]

It's said a lot. Right. Was it actually. Is there actually a movie where they say that?

[C]

I don't know. It could be one of those, like, meanwhile, back at the ranch.

[B]

Clean. Clint Eastwood is my favorite western actor.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But John Wayne, obviously, is another great western movie actor. Ton of Western movies. I. I said this. If. If westerns were the wwe, I think John Wayne would be Hulk Hogan, and then Clint Eastwood would be like the crow sting. Okay. Right. Both very popular. But, you know, I think John Wayne is, like, more commercialized. Yeah. And he's like. Clint is, like, darker.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, he's at the. He's at the eyes. He always narrows his eyes.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This town Ain't Big Enough for the Two of Us was first used in 1869 in a short story set in Yuba County, California. So it was from a book and then it just became. It's such a. It's like the first time somebody says that, you're like, oh, dude, I'm gonna say that every chance I get now.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Out there in the West.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I also just watched the movie. This is a John Way movie called the man who Shot Liberty Valance. You ever seen that?

[C]

I have it.

[B]

It's like, I feel like you watch so many of these movies and when they first start, you go, this movie's all old and the film looks bad. And this is gonna. This is gonna be a bad. And it's like they're so deep that you just don't see it coming. And that's one of these movies. Very good. What Westerns have you guys seen?

[C]

I've seen the movies that I could almost recite would be Unforgiven. Tombstone. I probably could recite. I've seen it so many times. 310 to Yuma.

[B]

What do you like about Tombstone?

[C]

Well, you know, the funny thing.

[A]

Is he in that? No, I'm thinking of. What's the one where all the worms come out of the ground?

[B]

Trimmers.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Kind of a Western, I guess. A bit of a modern day Western. Yeah.

[C]

The thing about Tombstone is the movie Wyatt Earp with Kevin Costner came out six months later.

[B]

I've not seen it.

[C]

And Tombstone was so popular. It was. The More. I don't know how you say it. It's got the catchphrases, it's got the cool action.

[B]

Val Kilmer really stole the show.

[C]

Wyatt Earp, I think, is trying to be a little bit more authentic, I guess, in a way, for lack of a better word, where there's not cool catchphrases that they're saying before it's so white Herp kind of got ripped by the average fan because everybody loved Tombstone.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What do I love about it? You know what? I looked it up. I was surprised how accurate it is historically.

[A]

Oh, that's cool.

[C]

It's much more accurate than I expected. I mean, Doc Holliday did have tuberculosis. He did go out West. He was friends with White Herb. All that stuff was pretty accurate. Johnny Ringo in the movie Johnny Ringo and Val Kilmer. Doc Holliday have the big showdown at the end, but they said Johnny Ringo probably committed suicide, but they're not sure. Okay, but you didn't ask for historical analysis. Yes. Why I like the movie. It's just.

[A]

That's part of it.

[B]

Open range.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

You big fan of that one.

[C]

It's been so long since I've seen it, I can't really comment on it.

[B]

It's Kevin Costner and Robert Duvall, I think both one of the great. Both the greatest. You know, these. Both of these guys on their own are like one of the greatest.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Coster's been in so much like Costner really gets. You know, people act like he's not one of the best.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And he is.

[A]

It's gonna take him dying for people to appreciate it.

[C]

I think Wyatt Earp, though, was a long movie, and that's when people were down on Kevin Costner because he was making the long, epic movies. And they're like, we don't want to

[B]

see a three hour Dances with Wolves. That's also a western.

[C]

That's another one.

[B]

I could very good tell you. Very.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Beat Goodfellas in the Oscars that year.

[C]

That changed the way people looked at Native Americans. There'd never been a movie that portrayed Native Americans with some empathy and that they're just like us and that all that. So I didn't know that part of it. Yeah. You know, most old westerns had the stereotypical portrayal.

[A]

They weren't handling it very sensitively.

[C]

Yeah, but. But that's what Wolves was. You know, handled it very simple.

[B]

I think we can. You know, all these moves are old, so, you know, if there's a spoiler, I think it's okay. But 3:10 to Yuma, I had told you, you always said to me was one of your favorites, right?

[C]

Yeah. It's actually a remake. I've only seen the. The remake.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

That's all I've seen too.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Christian Bale, Russell Crowe.

[C]

But it doesn't end the way you like. The hero does.

[B]

It doesn't. And it. And the bad guy is not so bad. What I like in that movie is like, this movie is Christian Bale taking Russell Crowe to get on the train to go to prison. The 310 to Yuma is the prison train.

[A]

Oh, that's good. I never knew what that meant.

[B]

So he's taken him there.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And. And. And, you know, Russell Crowe has a gang of people that are coming to rescue him.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So there's a little posse trying to take Russell Crowe to the train, and little by little, they all get killed off until finally you get down to just Christian Bale and Russell Crowe. And there's the the whole.

[C]

I'm sorry, he's just a farmer.

[B]

Well, the whole time you're thinking, though, he is just a farmer, but the whole time you're thinking he's a secret. Like he really is. Like, I don't know the term BA but he's okay.

[C]

A gunslinger tough.

[B]

Yeah. You think a tough guy. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You really think he is. And so you get to a moment where Russell Crowe starts choking out Christian Bale, and he's about to die. He's about to kill him, and he goes. He just says, I ain't. You know. He goes, I ain't never been a hero. He says that to him. He goes, I just. He goes, I've never been involved in anything. He said, I was in the army, but my leg got shot off by one of my own people. It was friendly fire. He goes, I've never even been in conflict. So you see this flip where it's like, all right, so this guy's nothing. He is just a farmer.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then Russell Crowe, that's where you see his character change to where he's like this bad guy, evil bad guy. And he goes, and. And Christian Bale says, imagine telling that to your son and him still respecting you. So Russell Crowe's like, all right. You can see it where he's like, all right, you're getting me to the train. I'm gonna let you get me to the train.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then they run together. They're on now. They're working on a team to get him to the train while Russell Crowe's gang's still hunting them.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then Russell Crowe had already said. He goes, this prison you're taking to me, taking me to. I've already escaped twice, you know, so I'm not worried about going, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it gets him there to the train. And I think that's great. I love it. I wish you'd seen any Western ever.

[A]

I've seen some.

[C]

In fairness, I warned you, Dusty, that we haven't seen a lot of these Western.

[B]

No, no, You've seen some. But I'm saying I wish I had.

[A]

I've seen some.

[B]

What have you seen?

[C]

Django Unchained.

[A]

Django Unchained.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Do you think of that as a Western?

[A]

It is a western. Spaghetti Western.

[B]

I like it.

[C]

I mean, I know I said that earlier, it's spaghetti Western, but I think when I watch it, I'm not thinking of it as a Western. I'm thinking of as more like a.

[B]

I think Tarantino movies are Tarantino movies. Right. Because the Hateful Eight would also be a Western, but it's still like a. It's a Quentin Tarantino, Little House on the Prairie. I never really watched it. I.

[C]

Come on, Dusty. I mean, you know they're making a remake of that on Netflix.

[A]

Oh, are they?

[B]

Yeah, they're taking their phones. It's a family. They're taking their phones.

[C]

No, it's not modern day. They're making a remake of it. And people were coming like, I hope it ain't all woke, this new version. And then Melissa Gilbert, who played Laura Ingalls, said she, like, tweeted or whatever. Like, well, the original version was woke. We covered alcoholism, blindness, blindness, racism. You know, all this stuff. That movie. I mean, that show was intense. It had some intense episodes.

[A]

That's interesting. I never thought of that being like, I don't know, I guess radicals the word at the time.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I was watching it way later.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Old Henry. You ever see that one? That was. That's a director from Live that lives in Nashville, directed that. Old Aaron Trace Atkins is in it a bit, and it's the guy who's in Old Brother Where Art Thou? Which I also think about a little bit of a western, bit of a comedy western.

[C]

You know what? I met that guy, the director,

[A]

Potsy.

[C]

He's friends with Leanne Morgan.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And he came to a show, that Ponce, Ponzarola. I think that's it.

[A]

Ponzaroli. Yeah.

[B]

And then Tim. Blake Nelson is the main. Main guy. That movie's great. I don't want to give any spoilers on that because that's relatively new. Yeah, that's great. I love that movie. And then we got Modern Day Cowboy.

[C]

Yeah, I was about to get there. I'm sorry, go ahead.

[B]

Where it's like. These are like. These may not be new movies, but they're kind of about cowboys in. In not the old West. Okay. Like urban Cowboy with John Travolta we talked about. Yeah. And then the cowboy way. Did you ever see that one? That one's Woody Harrelson and Kiefer Sutherland, I think.

[C]

Early 90s.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then work at the video store

[B]

one I just watched. Watch that. Really just. It had me for days. It's called Electric Horseman with Robert Redford.

[C]

Yeah, I never saw it.

[B]

And he's a bull rider. Or. Or. Or not a bull rider, but a. A roadie bronco rider.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And he's just one and Jane Fonda, Sydney Pollock movie, and he's, you know, just a champion. And then you Know falls products all the time and he gets, you know, becomes an alcoholic and. And then he wants to rescue a horse, so he rescues this horse. It's great. Yeah, really good.

[A]

That does sound fun. Willie Nelson's in.

[B]

Willie Nelson. Big part. Does the soundtrack. Couple of comedy westerns. Rio Bravo. Very good. That's John Wayne and Dean Martin, huh?

[C]

I didn't know that was a comedy.

[B]

I. I think. I think it was very funny.

[C]

Okay. I've never seen it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What about Hell or High Water?

[B]

I haven't seen it. I ordered it today.

[A]

I saw it.

[C]

It's great.

[A]

It's a really great movie.

[C]

Yeah, it's a. It's not set in the old west, it's modern day, but it's set in Texas.

[B]

That's like a no country for Old Men sort of thing where I think of that as sort of a western.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Even though, you know, it's. It's newer. Shanghai Noon, Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson combines two of my favorite genres and just westerns and kung fu movies. I think kung fu movies are basically Asian westerns. We could call them easterns and. But it's great. It combines a little bit of both because you have Jackie Chan, who's coming from China, and then people coming to look for him. So you get a little bit of that kung fu battle, a little bit of the western battle. Owen Wilson's really great in it. Maverick with Mel Gibson. I think of that as a western, even though it's just kind of gambling on a shipboat.

[C]

Well, sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What about this combines two of my favorite genres.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

The movie Cowboys and Aliens.

[B]

I like that. I like that movie.

[C]

You did. I was just doing it to mess with you.

[B]

Well, a lot of it really took. Everybody hated it. I forgot about it.

[C]

You love Harrison Ford.

[B]

I didn't think it was. Was great.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But I. I thought it was pretty cool for at least the first half of it, I think. I think this. In later part, I got a little wild, I think.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Kind of like the book, Stephen King books. The Gunslinger. I don't know if you ever read those. I read three or four of those and one was really good. But the more you get into it, the less it's like. It's less. It's like a gunslinger.

[A]

You didn't like this movie, Cowboys and Aliens?

[B]

I did not.

[A]

It looks terrible. Just based on the poster. Just to. They say never judge a movie by its poster, but that's all I got right now. Yeah, it looks a little.

[B]

All right. So let's. Let's Skip here.

[C]

What are you skipping?

[B]

Well, this is. This is some research here. That. That. That's the end of my. Well, that's basically the end of my research, except for my top five country songs about gunslingers.

[A]

Okay. Yeah, I love that.

[C]

That.

[B]

But, you know, we got top 10 Western movies. This is not my research, but this is. I ordered all of these that I haven't seen. Top five of the 21st century. True Grit.

[A]

True Grit was awesome.

[B]

Hell or High Water. The Assassination of Jesse James. No country for old men 3:10 to Yuma.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

I think old Henry should be in there. I mean, that movie is incredible.

[C]

Yeah. Maybe it wasn't out when that list was made.

[B]

Maybe so.

[A]

Yeah. Well, Henry 20, 21. Old Henry came out.

[B]

It's incredible. All right, so here's some music, though. These are top 10 Western songs in order by highest rated to lowest. Who rated some other bot based on industry list. This is not my list.

[A]

What is the.

[C]

That's what I was trying to say earlier when I said whistle, Whistle. Yeah.

[A]

And then the little thing blows.

[C]

Yes. Like a tumbleweed. Yeah.

[A]

What is that Western song?

[B]

I thought it was in here somewhere. Yeah. I also like that Clint Eastwood always smoke cigars in these movies. That. I really get into that.

[C]

You know, John Wayne was very tall.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah. I mean, that's.

[C]

Yeah, that's cool. The guy who played Matt Dillon, drawing a blank noun, is James Arnaz.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

He was, like, 6, 6, 6, 7.

[B]

He was. John Wayne was supposed to do Gunsmoke, and then he didn't want to do it, and he recommended James Arnaz.

[C]

Did you guys ever watch Bonanza?

[A]

Yeah, I did with my grandfather back in the day.

[B]

Michael Landon. Speaking of Little House on the Prairie.

[C]

Yeah, I was, Hoss. I was looked up. I didn't know this. So Ben Cartwright, played by Lorne Green, was the dad. He had three different wives who all had passed away. His three sons are all from different mothers.

[B]

Oh, in the show.

[A]

In the show.

[C]

Yeah. I never knew that. I mean, I watched the show a lot, but I never knew that. That's why they look up so different.

[B]

That's a great show. My dad's watched that. Tom, do you think they.

[A]

Did they die in the show?

[C]

I think maybe when the show first started, that was a storyline that was mentioned.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And I've never seen the original.

[A]

Yeah. I was just thinking of, like, Fresh Prince of Bel Air when they have a new Aunt Viv.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Between season one and two.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they don't explain it.

[B]

Yeah. All right. Let's do this. Top five country songs. Okay, then. And then we'll do where we're going and we'll be out of here.

[A]

Wrap it up.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Can I mention one more?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Another great theme song, Young Guns.

[B]

Oh, Young Guns. Love that.

[C]

I like Westerns if they are based on a, you know, true, real person. And Billy the Kid, you know the story. Young Guns 2, which you would like, Dusty. It's a conspiracy theory that Pat Garrett didn't really kill him like everyone says he did, that he let him escape. And the start of Young Guns 2, it's a newspaper reporter doing an interview with an old man who claims to be.

[A]

Oh, that's fun.

[C]

Billy the Kid. And he has some scars that match up and things like that. So he may have lived to the 1950s. They think.

[A]

Dang, that's cool.

[B]

I'm going to watch that. I bet I've seen two because two was the Bon Jovi soundtrack.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And my mom loved Bon Jovi growing up, so I bet I've seen it, but I don't remember it. I've watched Young Guns, the first one recently did enjoy it. All right, here we go. Top five country songs about gunfighters. There is also top ten western songs I've told you about. And it's got should have been a cowboy down here at number nine. I think it's. I think it's easy. Number one or number two. Should have been a cowboy is the best. Yeah. And then they got mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys is number one. I think it's great. But Willie Nelson's My heroes have always been cowboys. Much better, in my opinion.

[A]

But the highwaymen.

[B]

Highwayman.

[A]

Highway. Yeah.

[B]

I wouldn't think of it as really a cowboy song, I don't think, but it is great.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Was.

[A]

Doesn't he talk about I was. Isn't that one of the verses?

[B]

Maybe the. Maybe. But all four of them have a different thing.

[A]

But the idea is that type of dude, the highwayman, it can exist at any place in time. The spirit of. The spirit of this. You can take that guy. These guys that are cowboys back then you take that dude and put them in Mongolia or whatever.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's gonna be doing something.

[B]

Yeah, I agree with you.

[A]

Spirit.

[B]

All right, here we go. Top five country songs about gunfighter. Number five, don't take your guns to Town by Johnny Cash.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I already talked about earlier in the episode. Great song number four. This is a little unknown. I've just found this recently called Cattleman's Gun by a man named Dean Brody. Dean.

[A]

I know Dean Brody.

[C]

Do you?

[A]

Yeah. He had a song called Brothers that I really liked.

[B]

Love that song.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Cattleman's Gun.

[A]

Really newer guy.

[B]

Yeah. Number three. You're not going to think of this like a country song song, but this song got me into this genre of music, which I think this is a country song. I don't think they're a country band, but this is a country song. Rocky Raccoon by the Beatles.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Really great. And then number two, a song called Mr. Shorty by Marty Robbins.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And number one, Big Iron by Marty Rob Robbins.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Top two.

[C]

Claimed the top two.

[B]

Top two. Marty Robbins has a whole album called Gunfighter Ballads and Trail songs.

[A]

It's perfect.

[B]

All great. Yeah. Older, you know, it's got. You know.

[C]

But what was his most famous song?

[B]

El Paso.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's about a. Gunfire, right?

[B]

I hate that song. It's on the album that I like.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

But I. I don't understand the fascination with that song. But Big Iron is much better off that album. Saddle Tramp is much better. They're Hanging Me Tonight is better.

[C]

My favorite is Cowboy Take Me Away by Dixie Chicks.

[A]

That's a great song.

[C]

Yeah, you like it, Dusty?

[B]

That adds up.

[A]

About Space Cowboy. Yeah, that's a great song. Space Cowboy by Casey Musgraves. Do you have Badge and Gun by John Mayer on there?

[B]

No, I don't.

[A]

It's a hot western song. Close the laptop.

[B]

All right. That's all I got.

[A]

Thanks.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How about it?

[B]

Watch some Westerns, guys.

[A]

Yeah, you're right. You're right.

[C]

Well. Yeah. Which one? What. What would you recommend? To start with?

[A]

Good, the Bad the Ugly.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

How you know, are you gonna. You wanna, you know, devote some time? You ready to get right into it?

[C]

No, I was just trying to be nice.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

All right.

[C]

Well, just. I don't really have that much. If I could only watch one. What should I watch?

[B]

Well, this is what you do. I mean, you. I'll bring my hard drive in here and I'll download you a couple to your laptop, and then you can watch them on a plane. That's what I do. You get the old movies that aren't out there on a streamer somewhere.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Then you can watch them on a plane. Yeah, I think you watch how the West Was one, which is sort of a Western movie. Pretty long.

[C]

It was a miniseries.

[B]

Yeah, maybe so. But when I watched it, I just watched it all at one time.

[C]

James Arnaz is In that?

[B]

Yeah. And you watch it, and then it feels like it's like the early days of us settling the West. Yeah. So that sets the landscape for the movies that are going to come next.

[C]

There's a scene in how the West Was One where one of the girls or something got bit by a rattlesnake. And instead of taking her to the town, Dr. James Arnaz took her, now took her to the medicine man among the Native Americans.

[A]

Oh, interesting.

[C]

He said they knew more than. And any city doctor.

[A]

That's cool.

[B]

That adds up.

[C]

And I remember there was a lot. There was a scene where the guy said, if this. If she dies, I'll kill you. They said to him, and he's like, if she dies, you won't have to. As if to say he would kill himself.

[A]

Whoa.

[C]

It was powerful.

[B]

Wow. These movies are so powerful. You know what, though? This is what I would say. Start with the man who Shot Liberty Valance.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Start with that one. I was blown away how good that movie was. Truly blown away.

[A]

All right, I'll watch it.

[C]

Okay. I feel like I've seen some Westerns

[A]

I'm forgetting right now, but I'll watch that. And then. Will you read the book I got you?

[B]

Yeah, Yeah, I will.

[A]

Yeah. You'll tell everybody what I got.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

He got me the Helen Keller book. I wish I had brought it. It may be in my. No, it's in my wife's car. But it's we. He.

[A]

Story of my life.

[B]

The story of my life. He had me read the first two lines, and the end of the second line, she describes golden mist. And I go. And she. She got sick at maybe nine months old or something like that and lost her vision. And so she. There's a good chance she never remembered what a golden mist looks like. So how would she know to write that? And that's my point. And I can't. We can't talk about it every episode.

[A]

This will be the last time. It'll be the last time till next week and then.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. But, yeah, this weekend. Paducah, Kentucky. St. Louis, Missouri, come see me this weekend.

[C]

I'm at the Opry. Then here at the lab at Zany's. April 10, I got two shows at Company at the Carlson in Rochester, New York, but they're both sold out, so I don't know why I'm telling you.

[A]

Oh, that's awesome, man. Yeah.

[C]

I didn't have any. Anything to do with it, but.

[A]

What do you mean?

[C]

There's a charity that. They sold the tickets we don't need

[B]

to tell people it's sold out.

[C]

Sold out. A show that I haven't mentioned already. Sold out.

[B]

Both sold out.

[A]

You've sold thousands of tickets at the Opry, too. Yeah, Just take credit for all of it.

[C]

19,000 at Bridgestone.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

I've done multiple arenas.

[A]

I got a movie coming out in May.

[C]

Yeah, there you go.

[B]

And you do.

[A]

Thanks, man.

[B]

And you do.

[A]

And so do you. Yeah, we all do.

[C]

We'll see.

[A]

Look at us. Aaron Weber here. This weekend I am in Minneapolis, Minnesota at Sisyphus Brewing Company. Four shows. Two of them are sold out. Get tickets to the other.

[C]

You go to Twins game while you can.

[A]

It doesn't match up. I got Brian Bates luck this year trying to go to games.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Can't get in on anything. And then April, part of the Nashville Comedy Festival, headlining my first full weekend in the main room here at Zany's in Nashville. So Minneapolis and then here in Nashville, if you want to come see me. God bless. That's going to be it for us. Everybody signing out. In case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and good night for Dusty Slay and Brian Bates. I'm Aaron Weber. Have a great rest of your evening. Thank you. And we appreciate you. Wishing you pleasant evening.

[B]

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