What's Happening With Bob

Summary

The Necessary Conversation – "What's Happening With Bob" (May 6, 2026)

Overview

This episode of The Necessary Conversation takes a deeply personal turn as Chad (the host) sits down with his mother to give listeners an update on his father, Bob, whose absence from recent episodes has prompted concern. Instead of discussing national politics, the duo candidly unpacks the challenges, confusion, and emotional turmoil the family has faced as Bob moves through various levels of the American healthcare system. The conversation becomes a heartfelt reflection on family support, the realities of medical care, and how urgent health issues can put everyday political debates into sharp perspective.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Recap of the Previous Episode with Peppermint (00:00–04:11)

• Chad asks his mom about her experience on the prior episode with Peppermint, a trans guest.
• Mom acknowledges that the conversation left an impression, though she still holds some traditional views about transgender athletes in sports.
  • She discusses the idea of separate sports for "boys, girls, and trans people," noting some regret she didn’t delve deeper into this topic with Peppermint.
• Chad challenges her logic, using the example of natural skill advantages in sports generally.
• "I've met a man that dressed like a woman, but that's not a trans." – Mom (03:52)
• This segment underscores the incremental but meaningful exposure to new perspectives.

The Saga of Bob's Health: Navigating the Healthcare System (04:11–18:02)

• Mom recounts in detail the sequence of medical visits, diagnoses, and misadventures:

  • Bob's ongoing fatigue and swelling spurred visits to various specialists, who initially found nothing serious.
  • A rapid health decline led to emergency hospitalization.
  • A dramatic and darkly comic moment: an enema intended for Bob is accidentally given to him to drink.
    • "He was drinking his enema." – Chad (08:28)
  • After a misdiagnosis and subpar care at the public hospital, Bob was transferred to a rehab facility where the actual issue—congestive heart failure (CHF)—was identified thanks to an observant nurse and an, as Mom describes, "no-name" aide.
    • "Congestive heart failure can be, you know, you can live with it as long as you regulate it." – Mom (10:42)
  • Lasix (a diuretic) was prescribed and Bob’s health markedly improved.

• Reflections on the system:

  • The family's access to quality care is directly tied to having good insurance.
  • "If we didn’t have good insurance to be admitted...what do you do? Dad would be dead. That is what we would do." – Chad (11:47)
  • Mom expresses empathy for people lacking insurance; their ordeal has given her new perspective.

The Reality of Rehab, Insurance, and Performance-Based Care (12:13–15:20)

• The rehab facility requires proof of progress—Bob must do three hours of therapy per day to stay.

  • If unsuccessful, he may need to move to skilled nursing.
  • The situation is stressful; the family is awaiting a care plan update.
  • "If you pray or can send us happy thoughts, we need them for tomorrow. And what this helped me realize, politics is not the most important thing in the world. If you’re not talking to your family over politics, go talk to them." – Mom (13:35)

• Mom touches on their upcoming anniversary and her hope Bob will improve enough to celebrate.

  • "He is a fighter and he’s a tough son of a...and I believe he’s going to get through this so I can have him one more time." – Mom (14:42)

The Toll of Crisis and Stepping Back from Politics (15:20–19:53)

• Chad and his mother note how real life health emergencies eclipse political discourse.

  • Mom has paid almost no attention to the news, only hearing "Donald Trump brought back the fitness testing for kids," and seeing brief headlines.
  • "My focus has been different." – Mom (16:39)

• Chad observes this break from the news cycle as both necessary and revealing.

  • "It breaks you out of that cycle, right?" – Chad (16:41)

• Mom describes her newfound empathy for others in the system, and Chad relates his own experience as a cancer patient:

  • "To me, it just felt like a conveyor belt." – Chad (19:35)
  • Shared frustrations with the quality and capacity of care in understaffed hospitals.

Systemic Challenges and Political Reflections (19:53–20:36)

• They discuss systemic issues in American healthcare:
  • Understaffed and burned-out nurses.
  • Decreased funding for hospitals and the resultant domino effect on care quality.
  • "All the people taking care of us have pressure on them for their jobs now." – Mom (20:29)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On facing the medical system:
  • "If we didn’t have good insurance...Dad would be dead." – Chad (11:47)
• On empathy for others:
  • "It did open my eyes for the poor people that don't have insurance." – Mom (18:02)
• On hope and family:
  • "I keep telling him I want to celebrate another one (anniversary) with you, so you need to get up and get moving." – Mom (14:55)
• On shifting priorities:
  • "Politics is not the most important thing in the world. If you’re not talking to your family over politics, go talk to them." – Mom (13:35)
• Humor amid crisis:
  • "We'll get him as he's drinking his enema." – Chad (21:51)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Intro and last week’s episode recap – 00:00–04:11
• Mom describes Bob’s medical journey – 04:11–14:41
• Family reflections, insurance, and politics vs. real life – 14:41–18:34
• Healthcare system critique, Chad’s cancer experience – 18:34–20:36
• Closing, hope for Bob’s recovery and family update – 20:36–22:16

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Tone

The episode is unsparingly honest but warm, marked by moments of frustration, gallows humor, and deep family affection. The conversation walks the line between darkly comic (the enema incident) and movingly earnest, as both speakers reflect on caregiving, vulnerability, and the ways in which family crises can transform one’s worldview.

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Summary

For listeners, this episode offers a firsthand look at the personal impact of health emergencies, the convoluted paths through the medical system, and how these experiences can radically shift one’s priorities and views on societal structures like healthcare and politics. It’s a necessary conversation—about fragility, resilience, and deeper family bonds forged in adversity. The family’s hope is clear: that Bob will soon be back, ornery as ever, rejoining both the podcast and his family at home.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome to the Necessary Conversation midweek edition. It is me, Chad, with my mom today, nobody else. And we are going to be discussing some non political issues, issues that involve my dad, your husband Bob, and where he has been and what's been going on this past week. Before we get to that, though, I do want to ask you something about last week's episode. The last episode you were on was with Peppermint last Wednesday. How did you like that episode?

[B]

I liked it. It was okay. It was good. Yeah, I did. I have thought about it. I thought she. Correct.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Was very nice person. She was kind to me. I was kind to her. I learned a lot. I liked Peppermint.

[A]

Okay. Has it changed your mind at all on any of the issues that you have or any of the stances you have regarding trans people in America or I guess broadly globally?

[B]

Yes. When we talked about sports, though, I didn't get into that deep enough with her because she said she didn't like sports anyway and there shouldn't be any.

[A]

Yeah, but I mean, that's.

[B]

I have.

[A]

Joking a little bit on other.

[B]

I know, but I think she really meant that because on other podcasts I've always. She did.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

On other podcasts I have said I wish there was boy sports, girl sports, and then transports. And I wondered what her opinion was on that. And I didn't get to that. So I didn't kind of talk about that.

[A]

I mean, part of your whole argument against trans athletes is the idea that like a trans woman would be physically stronger than a biological woman or have some kind of physical competitive advantage in any given sport. Right. But.

[B]

And she did bring some of that up. I do remember her saying that the hormones, they level them out and they're the same. But I have seen the ones that have transitioned to be a man, Right. That can like kick the crap out of a woman, a regular woman.

[A]

But within even what Peppermint was saying, and what I was trying to illustrate too last week was that even within like a. Let's take the NBA. And I think I used the example of Victor Wemanyama. Even within like the NBA where everybody in that league was born as a man, Right. Victor Weminyama is 7 foot 5 physically. He has certain abilities that no other guy has, regardless of what their birth gender or sex or whatever, they were assigned all that, regardless of all of that. That is true of every sport. Always. Whether the person is trans or not doesn't really matter. There are always going to be people in any given sport who are physically stronger, faster, Taller, have more stamina.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Regardless. So, like, why does that matter in your mind?

[B]

I still believe what you were born with, that that's the sport you should play. And then if the trans people don't agree with that, then they can have their own sports section. That's kind of what I believe. But, yeah, I liked her. Okay? I liked her a lot. She was nice.

[A]

All right.

[B]

And I felt bad that she got bullied when she was younger and all of that.

[A]

All right, well, once again, thank you to Peppermint for coming on and having the patience and the time and stuff to have that conversation. I think it did do you some good to just meet somebody who is trans, which I don't. You've never had that, right? You've never met a trans person?

[B]

No. That. You know, I. No, I've met a man that dressed like a woman, but that's not a trans.

[A]

Was that dad when he put on Haley's dress?

[B]

Yeah. Right. No, no, I've never met one.

[A]

Let's. All right, so. So let's discuss now what is going on with dad, why he hasn't been on the show, why you were not on the show last Sunday.

[B]

I have been gallivanting to places people don't like to gallivant to. I've been trying to swim through these waters of our health care system of hospitals, of different levels of care. He's been gone, like, through the system now and in hospitals a good almost a week or five days. I have some golden friends that have been in the healthcare system their whole life. There's a social worker, there's a healthcare person. Paula, Nancy. Then I've got listeners of Charlotte, Pam, and I've got my paramedic. I have Janice and Simone. I have a very strong group of women and my children, Chad and Haley, that are helping me navigate what needs to be done here. Bob progressively has been getting more tired, more tired, more tired and larger stomach, larger stomach, larger stomach. I have taken him. I love our family practitioner, that is a nurse practitioner, but it was to a point where she was saying, get him to some specialists. That's the word, specialists. Let's see what they say. The first one we went to was a diabetes specialist. He's been controlled his whole life. He sticks on his freestyle libre. We know where he's at. I promise you. He doesn't eat sugar. His levels are good. The specialist said, I see a lot worse people than you, Bob. I don't want to see you again for a whole year unless something goes wrong. So we Left that appointment. I have to turn off my. Just a minute on the computer. There we go. So we left that appointment. Everything's good. Then we went to a cross heart specialist. She took an echo, she did blood work. She said, you look really good, Mr. Colchin. Don't need to see you back unless anything's wrong. A little edema in the legs, but that happens if he eats too much salt. I'll see you back in a year. So those were the two big specialists. Then we have our specialists this summer for brain. For the brain things. Okay. All of a sudden, there was one day, he's like, I'm not able to walk here. I'm like, what? He'd been walking with his walker. Well, he went and drove the car all by himself on April 13th. I hate Friday the 13th. Drove the car, went, got the oil change, came home. From there, it just went downhill to where he could barely walk. He had to start using the walker. He couldn't get around. He was scaring me. And so one evening, he needed help getting in a chair, and he almost slid off the chair at that point. I looked at him, he looked at me. I said, we got to get you some help. And he said he agreed to it. Okay, 911 to the hospital. So he was in a hospital setting and, you know, they took our insurance, no worries. He was admitted to, like, a public hospital. They ran different tests. This. Oh, my gosh. I don't know why our family has shit stories. This doctor thought he was all clogged up. The big belly. Okay. Thought he was clogged up. The story with this is someone came to the hospital room door with a cup that looked like Hershey's syrup and said, here, he needs to drink it to get him going again. I'm over there telling him, here, drink this. He's gulped three big gulps down. The sister nun comes running in. No, no, no, no, no. Give me. I go, what? She said, that's his enema.

[A]

He was drinking his enema.

[B]

He was drinking his enema. So Sister Nunn takes that away, performs that miracle, and we got that done, and that was good. From there, he still wasn't feeling good. So that doctor was kind of wrong. From there, more swollen, more tummy stuff going on. That doctor said, let's get you to a rehab center. Maybe they can make you stronger. So from there, we're now into a rehab hospital. So he's been transported a lot now, too, with different transports. That's all scary. Now in the rehab hospital, the doctors are Excellent. The nurses are great, everything's going well. But it took an aide and a man that was flipping him over to help with covers and stuff to realize I heard him whisper something and. And there was also a nurse in there who I'd been talking with through the day. I couldn't figure out what they were whispering, so I waited till they went out in the hallway and I asked the nurse, what were you whispering? And she said, chf, Congestive heart failure. I said, what? She said, that's his big belly. She said, that's all the swollen stuff. She said, Dr. So and so is still here. Let's grab him. And. And she said, I can't guide you what to say, but ask him that. So thank God that doctor had not left yet. It was 5:30 at night and called him in and he said yes, I was leaning toward that. I wanted to give him one more night, but he said, if you think that, let's just start pushing the Lasix. Oh, and at the other hospital they took Lasix away. He had been on Lasix for a while and so they took him away for five days and then he just started exploding. So this doctor was cool. He said, yeah, I can do that. The next day he started feeling better. He's felt better every day. But it took an aide and there was a guy in there. I called him, no name. He wasn't even in their system yet. He wasn't even supposed to be helping in the hospital. I said, what's your name? He goes, I can't tell you. I said, okay, no name. Thank you. So no name in the aid. Figured it out, brought the doctor back and I think we're figuring this out. Each day he's gotten stronger, he's gotten better. Congestive heart failure can be, you know, you can live with it as long as you regulate it. I kept thinking it was diabetes because he was so exhausted and tired.

[A]

All this is related to being type 2 diabetic for as long as he has been.

[B]

Yes, some of it is, yes, he's been type 2 since he's 39 years old, but it's always been under control. So when I saw him getting more tired at home, I was thinking, is that his diabetes? But yet I check his monitor and it was fine. Now all of this, we have good insurance. The part that is sad is if we didn't have the good insurance to be admitted to these places, what do you do? What do you do?

[A]

Exactly. And that is, I mean, you know, to turn this back to politics, it's like you're experiencing firsthand what like really needing to rely on the American medical system is like to survive. Like, like you're saying, what would you do? Dad would be dead. That is what we would do. If you didn't have good insurance or the amount of financial debt, medical debt that you would go into would cripple you. That's your only other option.

[B]

It is. It has opened my eyes greatly. And the level of care is like in a regular hospital. It was. Well, they let him drink his damn enema. Come on. Yeah. You know the girl came and said, yes, he's supposed to drink it. He was not supposed to drink it. Yeah, they almost let him slip through one of those lift chair things. I went out in the hall and just cried and cried. Six people rushed in. It was not the best care there. So now in the rehab hospital, we do have better care, I do believe. But here's the kicker. If you don't show progress within the first week, that he can do three hours of physical therapy, it's all based on performance on him telling, telling them, yes, I can do this. I think I can. And not being a you know what, which he's been a little cranky today with them, but not bad, not bad, believe me. On Thursday they have a meeting. All of the people that have helped with them, all the Doctors, all the PTs, all the OTs, and then they come up with a plan, a care plan, and, and the caseworker, then they have a meeting. Then she will come back to me and tell me what they have decided. If they have decided tomorrow on Thursday that he cannot do the three hours, I know it's going to cry. He can't do the three hours. Then we don't get to stay. Then we will be going down, we will be going down to another level of care called skilled care, which is a nursing home care setting or facility. And I'll have to find. I just, I can't do this for him at home yet because he's not strong enough. So if you pray or can send us happy thoughts, we need them for tomorrow. And what this has helped me realize, politics is not the most important thing in the world. If you're not talking to your family over politics, go talk to them. Yeah, it's about family. It's about Chad and Haley helping now. It's about my golden friends surrounding me. I'm looking at mortality now for both of us. I'm navigating and I'm doing the best I can.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This is the hardest thing I've had to do in my life, I truly. He is a fighter and he's a tough son of a. And I believe he's going to get through this so that I can have him one more time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Our anniversary's at the end of the month, and I keep telling him I want to celebrate another one with you, so you need to get up and get moving. Yeah, he did real good today. I did sneak him1 diet Dr. Pepper. Not really. Snake. The nurse said he could have it. The nurse said he can have it. Chat. I.

[A]

They don't care.

[B]

Well, he can have one, she said. And then they're doing fluids. Ah. Well, the enabler. I'm sorry, I'm turning.

[A]

I know that. That this is horrible, and me and Haley are trying the best we can to help you out from afar. We're going to be there next week to hopefully, you know, get our hands dirty in this. See what he. See what's going on. Go up to that facility and everything.

[B]

They'll get back on this podcast. It may not be for a while because they're gonna.

[A]

I don't know about that.

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

You think he's gonna come back on here and yell at us?

[B]

Yeah, he'll be back. Not for a while. He'll be back on the podcast.

[A]

We'll see.

[B]

I truly believe it.

[A]

Yeah. I just.

[B]

I know you're going through with politics. You know, I've turned on the tv, but I'm sitting here like a zombie.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The only thing I heard, I saw J.D. vance was in my hometown, and I didn't get to see him. I guess he flew into OKC for a fundraiser. And then I heard this morning, Donald Trump brought back the fitness testing for kids, which I thought was cool because I used to do that when I was a teacher. Like, they'd run a mile, they'd have to do a shuttle run and setups. And I think during the Obama era, they had it, but he changed it up or something. So now Trump's brought it back. I thought that was pretty cool. I said two political things I've heard in a week. I don't know anything about anything else.

[A]

Yeah, but see, that's.

[B]

My focus has been different.

[A]

And that is interesting, too, that when you are faced with some kind of, like, real life, you stop watching Newsmax, you stop looking at Instagram as much, and it breaks you out of that cycle, right?

[B]

It did. Yeah, it did.

[A]

So maybe it's a good time to take a break from all of it.

[B]

And I Did I did see something about. I saw Erica Kirk in a dark, dark suit with a dark hat and yeah, some kind of did a very

[A]

weird podcast thing and, and people are making fun of it. There's been a lot going on. Obviously there's the Iran war today. They're saying that they may have a kind of a pre. Agreement, like a memo that they're both going to sign to say we will do a ceasefire and give ourselves 30 days or something. I forget what the time frame was to like come to a real agreement and end this war, but. No, I, I just want to say that I know you're going through a. A really difficult time and me and Haley are going to do the best we can to support you through all this and to support dad the best that we can and stuff.

[B]

He'll get better, I promise you. He's tough. He'll be back on here yelling at you very soon. I hope. Might take.

[A]

I know. I can't believe I'm like, yep, I hope he'll come call me a stupid communist again. I can't believe that I'm, I'm wishing for that. It's. It's absurd to say, but yeah, it's. You know, this definitely puts a lot of stuff in perspective.

[B]

I've been tired since Peppermint, the Peppermint Show. He was yelling at me in the background to do stuff. And I have been doing stuff for him for a while because he physically can't. But now that I know he's tucked away in a good place and he'll get stronger and better. But it did open my eyes for the poor people that don't have insurance. Yeah, they would not take us in this rehab place unless we had the insurance, of course, because they know that it's paid for and they say, okay, come on in. You know.

[A]

Yeah, I, I totally agree. I mean, I. When I was going through cancer, that was my first real. Like, you're in a medical system now. I've obviously, like, I had an ACL replacement where you get one surgery. I've gone to the doctor. I've had some, like, sports related injuries and stuff that I've had to do some things for. But cancer was the first time where it was like, you're now going to some medical facility every day to receive this treatment. You're going through surgeries, you're going through checkups. You've got like five different doctors that you have to see on an almost daily basis. That was the first time that I was in any thing like that and it was extremely eye opening to me to see how that kind of medical system works, where the people in it have to go there every day. And to me, it just felt like a conveyor belt. Like, I had some decent doctors and everything, but I also had some very bad ones who misdiagnosed initially cancer in my face as cystic acne.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So, yes, it was just like, what the. Is going on here? And then the. The churn rate is just like, get as many people as you can in that MRI machine or the radiation machine or whatever. You're just, like, backed up. As soon as somebody gets done with their radiation treatment, five minutes to change the little sheet that they put on the table, and then you're in there. And so I can only assume that,

[B]

like, in the nerve.

[A]

Sorry, go ahead.

[B]

The nurses are overstaffed in the bigger hospital we first went to.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They weren't nice. You know, they weren't nice. Understanding, you know, little kindness here. I asked one question. They called me Missy. Just a minute. Another lady said, I have four more patients in front of you.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But do you remember when Trump, with the big, beautiful bill and all the shit that he was doing was taking funding away from hospitals so that a bunch of hospitals have had to close over the past year and a half or whatever it's been since he's been in office?

[B]

And as a result, all these people that are.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah. All the people taking care of us have pressure on them for their jobs now.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

Yeah. It's not. Yeah.

[A]

The whole system is.

[B]

God, I know. Okay.

[A]

You done? Is that it?

[B]

I'm done. That was one of my golden friends calling me.

[A]

Okay, well, thank you for doing this, Mom. I do love you. I love dad. Me and Haley are going to be there next week to help you as best we can, get through as much as we can while we're there. And I know. Thank you for doing this podcast. I know this is not easy stuff to talk about, but as much as this show is about politics, it's also about our family. And this is a. It's a huge kind of event that is going on in our family right now. So I appreciate you coming on here talking about it. And I, too, hope dad will be back here calling me a communist as soon as possible.

[B]

He will. I guarantee it. I guarantee it. He's tough.

[A]

All right, well, we will be back. This is a short episode to just kind of give a. An update, and we'll be back on Sunday. Do you believe you'll be on that episode

[B]

possible. Yes, the. I think I can. We'll. Okay, we'll play it by work around the time.

[A]

But yeah, yeah, it'll at least be me and hey or no, Haley's out of town.

[B]

Haley's out. So it's me you gotta do.

[A]

Or dad. Yeah, you can take your phone in there and we'll get him. We'll get him as he's drinking his enema. He can be on the sedation.

[B]

He's been good today. Today was a good report, so he was good. Good boy.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Well, thank you, everybody. I love you too, Mom. Thanks, everybody, for joining us. We'll be back Sunday and hopefully there will be maybe an update about dad and we'll be talking more politics on Sunday as well, so join us for that.

[B]

Okay?