Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (8:14)

No shit. It's not going to be easy for you.

Maureen Callahan (8:22)

Why is it not going to be easy?

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (8:26)

You're not Bright enough. How's that?

Maureen Callahan (8:31)

And he's saying some of this stuff with like a smile, but you know, this, the kind of smile, it's like a you smile. And this is the way he talks to his director on camera. So imagine what he sounds like when, when he thinks cameras are down or nobody's recording a thing. This woman's an Emmy winner and at one point he calls her you bitch. He says, you bitch. And you know, he likes to think he's the smartest person in the room. But I'm just going to say, Chevy, the obvious, the obvious point, which is this woman, the way your documentary turns out, unless there's some other side deal that we're unaware of in which you had final cut, she's going to shape this documentary. So why would you antagonize her? Why would you say to her, I think you're fucking stupid? Have you not gotten a single memo since me too exploded, you know, talking to a woman like that? Okay, okay. Now Chevy's brother Ned talks about visiting Chevy in LA and growing. Going to a restaurant rather with a, with a bunch of people. They're in a restaurant. It's at the height of his fame. It's 1981 and there's just a mound of cocaine on the table, in the middle of the table, on the restaurant. And nobody bats an eye. Nobody bats an eye. Chevy was about to start filming Modern Problems. It's about a man whose life winds up in a crazy drug fueled spiral. Friends say it, it mirrored his personal life. And the producer of that movie, Alan Grisman, talks about Chevy also doing huge, huge, just piles of cocaine during meetings about the movie. And what the real problem there though was that Chevy not gonna spoil it. Here we go.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (10:26)

Chevy, you don't wanna work with him because he can be so unpleasant and so gratuitously mean. And I don't think he knows that he is. I think it's just, it's an instinct.

Maureen Callahan (10:41)

Oh, Alan, trust me, he knows he's mean. He knows he's mean. He's alienated and offended enough people throughout his long career to know that he's mean. Now what Alan did not say, I thought he was about to say. The problem with Chevy doing mounds of cocaine during these production meetings was that he didn't share. Now, Chevy famously did SNL for one season and then the first, and then he skedaddled and he was like, off. I'm gonna go be a movie star, okay? And he was replaced by Bill Murray, who also has a terrible reputation, okay? Terrible Comics are often really fucked up people. They are often very angry. They are working out a lot of rage. Not all of them, but most of them. Okay, Now Jim Miller, who is the co author of the Indispensable. If you guys haven't read this oral history, it's amazing. Live from New York. I brought my copy because we're going to talk about some stuff that isn't in the doc. But he talks here about Chevy returning to host SNL in 1985. Now 85, mid-80s. Reagan had just left office, right? No, no, it was, Reagan was president. Terry Sweeney was a cast member, the first openly gay cast member and he often played Nancy Reagan. Now so this is the height of the AIDS crisis, okay? It took Ronald Reagan years to even say the word aids, okay? And it was a time in which gay people, gay men especially, were just shunned and mocked. And so here's how, here's how Chevy, returning as the big conquering hero of Hollywood, treated Terry Sweeney on the set. Here we go.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (12:34)

He was really tough on the furniture that week, particularly Terry Sweeney, who was the first openly gay cast member of snl. President Kennedy, very good guy. Yeah, this wonderfully warm icebreaker with Terry Sweeney which was you're gay, right? And Terry said, yes, what would you like me to do for you? And Chevy said, you can start by licking my balls. And then of course it went downhill from there.

Maureen Callahan (13:00)

I think Chevy, you don't say Chevy.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (13:02)

He would say things that were funny, but he would assume that you were comedy people and he could speak that way. You know, we would say terrible things because. Cuz that's what would make us laugh. It wasn't, we didn't tell anecdotes.

Maureen Callahan (13:18)

You know, you said to Terry Sweeney, oh, you're the gay guy. Why don't we do something where you, we, we say you have AIDS and then every week we weigh you.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (13:31)

That's the worst.

Maureen Callahan (13:35)

So Chevy Chase laughs like heartily, genuinely at that and then and then says oh, that's the worst. But you know, I don't think he means it. And prior to that explaining why it was that Chevy could, was allowed to get away with talking to people like that on, on his show, on Lorne Michaels show. That's Lorne Michaels talking there. That you know what Lorne Michaels like he want, he'll be remembered for like not leaving snl, you know, like holding on to the reins of power. But really what Lauren Michaels is going to be remembered for is being a dreadful, insupportable star non perel and There's a clip of Lauren in this stock as a young man at like a press conference saying he believes that when once you start cherry picking things and people who cannot be made fun of, your comedy suffers. And to Lauren, I have three words, four words. Alec and Hilaria Baldwin. Now here, here is Chevy being told how hurt Terry Sweeney was. Terry Sweeney did not participate in this documentary. I think that was a very healthy choice for him. Being told how hurt Terry was by Chevy's comments that he would like Terry to lick his balls. And his best idea for a sketch, my paraphrasing is one in which Terry plays an AIDS patient and they weigh him every week to see how much weight he's losing. Here we go.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (15:05)

Terry Sweeney. I mean, he was very funny, this guy. I don't think he's alive anymore, Terry Sweeney. I hope he isn't because I don't want you talking to him about this.

Maureen Callahan (15:15)

He's alive, is he? Yeah.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (15:17)

How do you know?

Maureen Callahan (15:19)

Because I looked him up on Google. I mean, is he alive? He's alive.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (15:24)

Oh, he's alive With a gay guy.

Maureen Callahan (15:29)

Oh, God, no. I think, I think. And this is.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (15:32)

But the idea of weighing him, come on, that's, that's clearly me.

Maureen Callahan (15:39)

Okay, so Chevy, of course, tries to just make a joke. That's what, that's what, like, cowards like this do, like, mean bullies. I mean, bullies are mean. That's redundant. But you know what I mean, he's a bully, so he's got to turn it into like a joke. And like, oh, how do you know he's alive? And the director, it's like, I fucking googled it. The woman who's not bright enough to crack the code of one Chevy Chase. So now he's like, well, prove to me that he was hurt. You're saying it's in books. And somebody brings their copy of Live from New York and they read this extract. And the, the audio, it's a little soft because the person off camera isn't miked. But listen closely. You'll be, you should be able to make it out. Here we go. Chevy turned to me and he said, oh, you're the gay guy, right? And he said, I've got an idea for a sketch for you. How about we say you have AIDS and we weigh you every week. It was out of place. So then he ended up having to apologize and actually coming to my office. He was really furious that he had to apologize to me. He was just beside himself and it was just awful.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (16:39)

None of that's true. I would remember that. You would? Yeah, that I. That I was angry that I had to apologize to him. Good God, Chevy, what's wrong with you? I mean, of course I. That. That's just not true. My memory is that he's lying is my memory. He's not telling the truth. That isn't me. That's not how I am. And if I am that way, my life has changed because I have to live with that now for the rest of my life because you guys can got a book out and read it to me.

Maureen Callahan (17:20)

Well, first of all, like all narcissists, he has made this vicious, vicious treatment of Terry Sweeney all about him. Yeah. Now my life is because I have to live with that, you know, and that's not me. He's lying. And I'm going to tell you something. I know I publish books. I know this. When you publish a book, they vet it, they go through legal. And if somebody's making an assertion like that, I guarantee you that thing was legaled eight way to Sunday. And by the way, live from New York, it's an oral history littered with cast members telling their stories of what it was like. So, you know, and everybody like what's notable about this documentary too is who's not in it. Okay. There are not many people who want to talk about this guy. Okay, I'm going to read from. Don't be mad at me. These are my Mel Robbins glasses. These were the only ones I was able to find at the moment. Terry Sweeney is one of the interviewees in live from New York. Here he is. Chevy hosted the second show and we were all so excited because to us, Chevy was like a God. This was someone returning who'd been one of the original people and was this legendary figure. And we were just excited to work with him. And when he got there, he was a monster. I mean, he insulted everybody. He said to Robert Downey Jr. Didn't your father used to be a successful director? Whatever happened to him? Boy, he sure died, you know, he sure went to hell. Downey turned ashen and then he went on to attack Chevy in the same way. Jane Curtin is in here saying that. John, this is page 144. John Belushi absolutely didn't like being in sketches with women. He told me women were not funny. Actually, Chevy said it to me as well, and I found it stunning. Now, for unknown reasons, Ryan Reynolds, who lost. Wait, did he win? I will have to ask Marlena. She can tell me. You know, he was up for our first inaugural Excuse me. Nerve awards. Celebrity arsonist of the year. As we know, he burned down his elementary school in Canada and later gave an interview in which he said he did get away with it and he hoped, he hoped that some poor schmuck wasn't spending time in prison for what he did. For unknown reasons, Ryan Reynolds is in here, this psycho arsonist. Hey, just my opinion, you know, but it is supported. It's supported by reports contemporaneous and after the fact. Now, Chevy, listen, if Chevy Chase had been born a little bit later, he would have been wise to something that's currently going on in the culture in which assholes, bullies, monst, recidivists say, hey, you know what? I'm on the spectrum, so back off. I'm neurodivergent. You know, Chevy doesn't have this defense at the ready. Now, Ryan, again, for unknown reasons, is in this documentary and he's talking about Chevy and how he ripped Chevy off in one of his first earlier lame comedies, lame movies. And towards the back part of the document, Chevy's abusive childhood is discussed. And it sounds terrible, and I'm sorry that he had such a terrible childhood. That does not give one license to be a monster for the rest of their lives. He's got a brother in here, a stepbrother in here. They both lived through the same, the same home, the same abusive childhood. I don't see them out here in these streets treating people like garbage. But so there we have it. So anyway, Ryan Reynolds is asked whether he knew such a fan of Chevy's. Such a fan. Did he know about Chevy's past? And watch his body language. It's so weird and squirrely. And I think Ryan is not that great of an actor. And I think Ryan is not that great of a liar. And I hope that this gives Justin Baldoni's team a little boost. Okay, here's Ryan. Do you know about his past? Do you know that he was abused as a child? I don't know know that he was.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (21:41)

Abused as a child.

Maureen Callahan (21:42)

But I, I, I am sort of sad to say that I would, I.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (21:46)

Would have guessed that because you know that what he's doing is a, is a, is a coping mechanism.

Maureen Callahan (21:56)

Hey, from one bully to another, what he's doing is a coping mechanism. I think Ryan thinks he's talking about comedy, but what I think that really means is a coping mechanism is making everybody else's life hell, you know, and getting your sadistic kinks out by treating people like crap. Here is Anthony Michael hall, made most famous in the John Hughes film Sixteen Candles. But when he was 14, he played Chevy's son in National Lampoon's Vacation. And here he is, Anthony, on the Inside of you podcast with Michael Rosenbaum. Now he's talking about the way Chevy talked to him as a 14 year old kid. When the cast had to come back six months after wrapping to reshoot the ending of Vacation.

Anthony Michael Hall (22:43)

Here we go, we regroup. Six months later, puberty kicked in. I'm like 4 inches taller. I get to the set at Magic Mountain, I got a huge zit on my chin. Chevy's like, nice. Okay, you're jerking off. Good to see you've grown. It was just probably. But that's how Chevy was. Yeah, yeah. No, he said, yeah, something like that. If you're blind, you're doing it right. Meaning I was whacking off. I don't know what the hell he was saying.

Maureen Callahan (23:05)

That's how Chevy was. Anybody who's ever had a bully in their family, immediate or extended or just a person who I would refer to as a non negotiable personality, knows that refrain all too well. Well, that's just how they are. And I, I reject that thoroughly out of hand. I don't care if that's how they are. I don't have to like it, I don't have to put up with it, and I don't have to be around it. Now the family moves out of LA to Bedford, New York. Chevy's wife Janie said he was suffering from severe depression and he probably was past the point of getting hired. And so the whole family uproots and moves to Bedford, New York. He has three daughters. Okay. And what becomes clear in this documentary is that everything revolved around Chevy. Everything. And you know, at a certain point in his floundering career, Chevy is offered the chance to host a late night talk show. And he says yes. The show is shooting in la. And one of the daughters, I believe it's the youngest daughter, is an adult now and is in LA and she's struggling as an actress and she says she's couch surfing. Now. This is where I see a bit of adjacency with the Rob Reiner thing, where it's like you have a child of a very, very famous, accomplished, famous man who is trying to compete in that industry or at least get a foothold in it, and is not really that attractive and is not really seemingly that talented and she's couch surfing. Even though the family has plenty of money to put this girl up in a nice place. But Now Chevy's coming to la. Chevy with his depression and his drug and his alcohol problems and his monster malignant narcissism. My opinion, he's coming to la. And so the wife calls up the daughter and says, hey, would you like a nice place to live? I'll get you one. If you live with your father and keep an eye on him, the talk show blows up. He's terrible at it. It seems like he didn't even put in, like, an iota of effort. And then he's hired on this network sitcom, Community, and the entire cast hated him, as did the showrunner. Now, I've talked about this a little bit before, but you can always tell what a production like the real people behind the scenes think about any given actor if and when they kill that actor off or write them out. And typically, the more violent and humiliating the death, the more that actor was loathed. Loathed. Look no further than Shonda Rhimes, who had had it with Patrick Dempsey on Grey's Anatomy, you know, and she had him die in, like, a fireball car crash. And that's a guy who loves racing cars. You know what I'm saying? So on Community, the way they. They got Chevy isolated from the rest of the cast, who again, hated him by all accounts, was to write a bit in which he is on a trampoline and. And flies so high on the trampoline that he vaults himself into a dumpster. Into a garbage dumpster. Okay? So they're throwing Chevy in the trash. That's what they're doing. His character breaks his legs, both of them. And so they confine him to a wheelchair, casts on both legs in tinier and tinier rooms. And that is a method of punishing a guy who's enormous. He's 6 4. He's a huge guy. And that was their sadistic way of. Of punishing him until he left in under claims of racism. Could. I could believe it. You know, you can watch in the documentary. He's got a pattern. You know, I'm just saying my opinion. Now, the 50th anniversary of SNL was last year, and we all lived through the relentless drumbeat and the relentless patting on the back of a show that has been mediocre for far too long. But Chevy was not invited to participate in the show. He was there for the broadcast with his wife, and he did the red carpet, but he was not invited to participate. And I would bet that it was the condition of many, if not every returning cast member that they would perform so long as they were kept far away from one Chevy Chase. Okay, here's Chevy on how much that hurt him.

Chevy Chase Documentary Narrator (27:42)

It was kind of upsetting, actually, and this would probably be the first time I'm saying it, but I expected that I would have been on the stage too, with all the other actors. When Garrett and Lorraine went on the stage there, I was curious as to why I didn't. No one asked me to. Why was I left aside, Cornelius Crane Chase, who we've all come to know as Connie. Let's face it, Weekend Updates simply would not exist without him. So it would be wrong to have him listed at anywhere but number four. Why was Paul Murray there? Why was. Was I not. I don't have an answer for that. I did bring it up once in a text to Lauren and then took it back. I. I said, okay, I take it back. It's silly, but it's not that silly. It was. Somebody's made a bad mistake there. I don't know who it was, but somebody made a mistake. They were. They should have had me on that stage. It hurt.

Maureen Callahan (28:59)

Guess who the final decision maker was. It's your great pal Lauren. You okay? It's your great pal Lauren, and he's like every narcissist that you've ever met, you know, like, there's no talking to them, there's no getting through to them, and there's no consequence. Look at Meghan Markle. There's no consequence that they can suffer where they don't turn around and say, but I'm the victim. My feelings were hurt. Why did they leave me out? Like, you've got people littered throughout Live from New York saying, I couldn't fucking stand the guy. He was a monster. And he's like, why'd they leave me out? All right, Chevy, consider that your legacy, okay? If the nerve has anything to do with it, we're making sure you're not getting out of the woodshed and actually you're heading to the wood chipper and then the stump grinder and then the burn pile in record time. So thank you for helping us to ring in 2026 with such a well deserved thumping. Coming up, we have a full celebrity roundup and your art and feedback. We are back in a minute. Today's show is brought to you by Oxford Natural, home of the All Natural, Optimum Day and Optimum Night supplements. Are you trying to lose weight and feel like yourself again? Thousands of men and women across the United States and the UK are already doing it with Oxford Natural, Optimum Day. Powers you with steady energy, it crushes cravings, and it keeps your metabolism firing all day. Optimum night helps you relax, sleep deeply, recover, and keep burning fat while you rest. England's soccer legend Michael owen has lost £40. And Robbie, the face of AFTV, dropped over £100. It has worked for others too, with customer testimonials raving about Oxford Naturals effectiveness. Now it's your turn. Scan the QR code or click the Link and grab 70% off your first order with code Nerve. No gimmicks, no needles, just results. Oxford Natural. Let's get to work.

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Maureen Callahan (32:14)

We are back. Before we get to all of your incredible feedback and art that you're gonna just. You're gonna die over, the. The troublemaker community is unparalleled. Nobody can beat you guys. Nobody can beat you guys. We've got art that you're just gonna die. Okay, but first we have to start. We have to. We have to clear the decks and we have to deal with some unpleasant pleasantness. Timothy Shamalama Ding Dong was at the Critics Choice Awards. And I've got a lot to say about that. But before we do, I found. Over the break, I would. I. I came across this savage review of Marty supreme, which the celebrity entertainment industrial complex would have you believe is a monster hit and a very important movie. It is neither of those things. Okay, this movie about underground ping Pong cost $90 million. Okay, $90 million. It's not going to make it back. I can promise you that. I can promise you that. Now the Boston Globe ran a savage review and I have to share a little bit of it with you because there is nothing like when when you can when a critic is incited to rhetorical violence against a movie to this extreme, the review itself becomes a work of art that can often surpass the the actual film or piece of entertainment it is it is reviewing. And so this is by a reviewer named Odie Henderson in the Boston Globe. This was published December 22, 2025. There's nothing I dislike more than a movie that demands you love an obnoxious, insufferable protagonist. Marty supreme is not only one of the worst examples of this phenomenon, it's also one of the worst movies of the year. It is a 150 minute tribute to this idiot plot. This type of movie would be over in 15 minutes if almost everyone in it didn't act like an idiot. Timothy Shamalama Ding Dongs My little tweak there latest bid for Oscar glory follows a determined ping pong player slash hustler through a series of supposedly suspenseful set pieces using ping pong as a catalyst for violence and danger. Unlike say usual movie go tos such as pool or poker is laughable as Marty Chalamet dons glasses, a whiny voice at a 12 year old boy's attempt at a mustache. That is Shyamalama Ding Dong himself, my friend, which in this movie's universe makes him a bigger sex machine than John Shaft. I guess this is what passed for Hot in 1952. When Marty supreme takes place. Women who jump into bed with him include the much older has been stage actor K. Stone, played by Gwyneth Paul Paltrow. The opening credits acknowledge Marty's fertile prowess. They are a direct ripoff of the opening credits of 1989's Talking Baby comedy look who's Talking. Both films use an irredeemable needle drop while thousands of sperm fly across the screen before finding an egg to fertilize. Nice try Hollywood. This guy does not read as such someone whose secondary sex characteristics have kicked in yet. And they will never, in my opinion. Back to the review. The impregnated woman is Marty's girlfriend Rachel Odessa Aon. If I'm saying her name right, she's very good. In the new show I Love La, whom he treats like dirt even when she's helping him with his schemes. At one point he berates her viciously, telling her that she is worthless compared to his dream of being a ping pong champion. So there you have it. Now, the Critics Choice Awards aired on Sunday, and I made sure to watch the bulk of it for you guys. Okay, so first, Paul W. Downs, the brilliant guy behind Hacks, and Megan Stalter, who is an actress on Hacks, arrived early on the red carpet dressed like Timothy Shyamalan, Ding dong in that stupid orange suit with a, like, cross body, leather leather handbag in the shape of a ping pong paddle. And, and Meg was dressed like Kylie Jenner, his on and off girlfriend. He trots her out when he needs her. And, you know, here's the thing. Timothee Chalamet won the award for best actor in a drama, and he and Kylie rolled in to the event, to the awards. They were being telecast live. He rolled in 90 minutes late. It's a two hour show. So he basically skipped the whole thing and decided to show up in time for his award. And then when he won, he got up there and he played humble and it was a very heavy lift. It was difficult to watch. He's not that great of an actor when left to his own devices. Oh, I'm just up here and I don't, I don't know when I'll be up here again. Says the guy who went viral last month for giving an interview in which he said, hey, man, I've been at this for like seven, eight years now. I'm, I'm delivering some top level. Give me the Oscar off, you twat. God can't stand him. Now, Timothy, by the way, on our bonus episode, we've got something in the works just for you. Just for you, my friend. Okay? Oh, and by the way, it was hysterical to look at the faces of all the other actors who were up against him in that category. Among them, Joel Edgerton, who is great. Ethan Hawke, who is so criminally ignored at all this stuff. Ethan Hawk is so good, you know, and when Timmy won, Joel Edgerton looked like he was gonna murder. He, he, he looked like he was going to murder. And Ethan Hawkins, like, turned to his wife and laughed, like, visibly laughed out loud. He knows what's up. He knows what's up. Anyway, so then prior to that, I mean, Timmy must have missed this because God knows what those two are up to before, you know, showing up 90 minutes in. But Seth Rogen won an award for his show, the Studio, which I do not like. It is just far too polite of a show. It's, it's, it's, it really deliberately overlooks, like, the seamy underbelly of his industry. Anyway, Seth Rogen showed up to the award and guess what? Seth won. He won. Listen to this guy's acceptance speech. You're not going to believe it. Here we go.

Anthony Michael Hall (39:05)

This is so nice. As someone who deeply, deeply, deeply cares what critics think of them in their work, this is, this is like what I'm looking for. This is, can cancel therapy this week. This is like, I'm good, I'm fixed. I'm fine, I think so.

Maureen Callahan (39:22)

He just insulted the critics who voted enthusiastically for him to win this award. I got a question, Seth. Why the fuck did you show up if you really think so little of critics? Why did you hire your stylist? Get groomed, get dressed, leave your house, get into a moving vehicle, sit in what was surely bumper to bumper traffic, do the red carpet, and then when you're awarded, when your name is read out, go up on stage and accept it. If you really think it's shit, why don't you just stay the fuck home. I can't stand people like this. And shame on everyone in that room who laughed at him. You know, again, you wonder how these monsters get made. Okay, next, Alec Baldwin. Alec Baldwin, over the break he was, he did an interview with a, with a podcast, the podcast Dopey. Which this, this podcast is making headlines. You know, I think if you're a. Well, they're all idiots. What can I say? Anyway, so Alec gave an interview and he was asked about Alec shooting the cinematographer Helena Hutchins to death on the set of Rust. It was an accidental shooting, but Alec can't shut the up about it. Even though he, he skated by the skin of his teeth on criminal charges. Okay. He said that his shooting Helena Hutchins, a 42 year old wife and mother to death on the set of Rust in an accident that never should have happened on a production that he was largely responsible for, has taken 10 years off his life. To which I would say he took life off of Helena Hutchins life. Okay? So if you lose 10 years, guess what? Nobody really gives a. Now on to our next offender, Carol Raill. Carol Radill. Over the break we, we all got the very sad news that Tatiana Schlossberg, the 35 year old daughter of Caroline Kennedy, granddaughter of Jack and Jackie Kennedy, she herself a young mother. She, I mean she was diagnosed after she literally after she gave birth with an incurable form of leukemia and she died over the holidays, leaving behind her two children and young husband. Carol Radill inserted herself into this Tragedy. You know, there are people like this. I know them. I'm sure you know them. They're like tragedy vultures. They love it when catastrophe strikes others, and they love inserting themselves into that white hot spotlight, you know? So she went on Instagram, Carol Radswell, who the Kennedy family has had nothing to do with since her husband, some. Some guy she married, excuse me, died of cancer. You know, I personally think she just wanted to be closer to Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, who I think she was really in love with, and John F. Kennedy Jr. You know, so she hitched her wagon to this guy who was, like, dying of cancer, and he died of cancer. So here's what Carol wrote on Instagram. I woke up to the news that Tatiana Schlossberg passed away last night, although I hadn't seen her in many years. I'm gonna guess that many years would be either John's wedding to Carolyn when she was like a toddler, or the funeral when she was like a very small child. Okay, so let's dispense with the Carol. Although I hadn't seen her in many years, the news brought back memories. She was 35, not much younger than my late husband Anthony when he passed away. The arithmetic of loss never makes sense to me. Who stays, who goes and when. There's no moral logic to it. This is the part I still can't accept. Now she goes on and she goes on, and then she tells people to go make a donation if they. If they so care to. To the JFK Library. How about, like, cancer research, you dumb twat. I cannot stand. Stand these people. You know, and this post comes. It's like, adjacent to or right before or after another post of Carol, who gives Sarah Jessica Parker a run for her money in the sprightly, 900 year old, romantic heroin downtown hipster stakes. You know, she. Carol. Carol's like 60 something, and here she is with, like, her freshly Botox face. Botox face. And she's got, like, you know, her earphones, like her really cool, cool. Like, no earbuds for her. We're like old school earphones. And they're like, slung around her neck, just sh. Just so. And then the caption reads, I'm on substack, exclamation point. Okay, Carol, okay, now we also got this clip. This was Marlena's find, and it is a gem. Again, we here at the Nerve, we are apolitical, but when a former presidential candidate who is married to a guy who has slapped at least one woman around, allegedly, I believe it Starts doling out dating and relationship advice. Well, hot damn, we've got a meme. Here we go. For anyone who is single, who wants to be in a relationship is to be kind to yourself and choose to be with someone who is kind. I mean, and there are different phases in your life, and depending on what phase you're in, maybe you're gonna choose that you want to have that kind of Friday night relationship or you want that. Okay, that's fine. That's fine. She's. She, again, she's taken up a lot of. A lot. A lot of words saying. We're speaking a lot of words, and we're saying nothing. So she says, you want to find someone who is kind. You want to find a guy who is kind. Says the woman who married Doug Emhoff, as discussed, slapped. Slapped an accomplished female attorney who he. She took him to Cannes for a gala, and on the red carpet in front of valets and other people, he didn't like that she went up to the valet and said, hey, could you. Could you. Would you mind grabbing our car? And he smacked her, allegedly, in the face, so hard that she spun around on high heels. This guy, also, Doug Emhoff, allegedly in his first marriage, had an affair with his children's nanny, and he allegedly knocked that nanny up, and the nanny allegedly lost that baby after Doug came over and had a little chat with her that may or may not have gotten physical. All I know is the cops are called, and it was a very serious report that was filed. It was the call that went out to the LAPD was, was, there's a life in danger report. But sure, Kamala would love the who better? Who better? Now, this also came across my algorithm. Thank you, algorithm during the break, and I couldn't believe it. You know, there's this guy who goes by Prof. G. His name is Scott Galloway. Very smart guy, has written some very interesting things, very interesting thinker. I normally, I could find my enjoyment of him and kind of admiration for him slipping away for quite some time now. And this clip has. Has cemented it. Okay. He came from nothing. He made a ton of money. Good for him. Great for him. He likes to talk a lot about masculinity in crisis and young men in crisis, which I think is extremely important. But he. He's got this podcast with, like, the equally insufferable, insupportably dreadful Kara Swisher. Cara comes from a lot of money, you know, but she's going to give herself some valorization here and say, like, hey, I'm a Go. I'm a golden unicorn in the world of journalism. You know, journalism is not typically a very highly paid profession. So if you. If you make money as a journalist, you are kind of a unicorn. But, like, it doesn't matter, Cara, because you came from money, which gives you a ton of leeway to take as many risks as you want and turn down jobs or quit jobs that you don't like. Okay, talk to the rest of us who, like, really had to grind it out with, like, terrible bosses and terrible jobs. Fuck off. Anyway, here is Scott Galloway talking to Kara Swisher about how much money they have again in this economy and how they like to spend it.

Scott Galloway (47:46)

I don't think about money a lot.

VRBO Advertisement Voice (47:48)

And that's my problem.

Scott Galloway (47:48)

I'm not interested in it. And I make a lot of money. I do for. Especially for a journalist. I'm like Daddy Warbuck journalists in that regard. But I would say I save a lot. I have a lot of savings, and I diversify. I'm sort of your basic person, basic bitch of investing. I have bonds. I've got quite a bit of real estate that I hold on to. Forced savings, as Scott calls it. I don't spend a lot of money. I really don't. It has nothing to do with me being frugal.

Maureen Callahan (48:15)

I just don't.

Scott Galloway (48:15)

I don't like buying a lot of stuff.

Kara Swisher (48:17)

You're the primary breadwinner in a family of four or six people. I mean, that in itself is Mommy's got to make real money.

Scott Galloway (48:24)

I have a basket of stocks. I've got real estate. I'm very diversified.

Maureen Callahan (48:28)

I have a lot of cash right now.

Kara Swisher (48:29)

One of my addictions is money, and that is, I continue to be too focused on it to the detriment of my mental health. I grew up with a scarcity of money until, you know, I got through my senior year of college on top ramen and bananas. I spend between three and four hundred thousand dollars a month. I own homes all over the world. I have a plane. I spend most of my money on homes and experiences. But along those lines, the way I try and keep in check is I think hoarding money is a virus. When I hit my number eight years ago, I decided anything above that number I would give away. And what I do each year is I look at my total spending and I match it and I give that amount of money away. I'm spending money like a 50s gangster just diagnosed with ass cancer.

Maureen Callahan (49:11)

A 50s gangster just diagnosed with ass cancer. I mean, ass cancer is really. I think I can Think of no better way to describe the contents of that conversation. He says out loud. I spend 300 to $400,000 a month. I have a plane. I have homes all over the world. I have so much money. It's disgusting. It's disgusting. I. I'm strangely at a loss for words. I really am, you know? Anyway, I also just want to make a brief mention. Thanks to troublemaker AJ I finally, finally watched season three of the Newsreader. You can do it with a VPN if you're not in Australia. And I loved it. I loved it. We'll talk about it more in depth when it really is streaming in in America, hopefully on the early part of this year. Now to audience mail and art. Okay, this came in from troublemaker Angie, who says, hi, queen of the Troublemakers. Well, thank you for that. I hope you enjoy this mini woodshed I made. Angie made this woodshed. Okay. Look at it. It's got a corrugated steel rooftop and it's got wood on the outside of it and there's little pebbles and little vegetation. And I just love it and adore it. And Marlena and I were thinking, Angie, that perhaps this should be. This should be the dwelling for our word shed, where we're going to put all of our grammatical, syntactical offenders. Hi, Maureen and Team Nerve. I just love you guys. This comes from troublemaker Karen Music street fire Supply. She sent this incredible, incredible box of all natural firewood. And it's got these little beautifully wrapped fire starters that say things like let's go or allegedly. And we just love it. So thank you. Thank you, troublemaker Karen. I'll use it to build a fire tonight. Okay? It's freezing out in New York, freezing on Long Island. Okay, here is. This is where we're going to get into our mixed media artwork from the Troublemakers. Dear Maureen, we are writing as two lifelong best friends since first grade, Long Island Gen X vintage troublemakers Lisa and Renee. You know who you are. One of us is now in Connecticut, the other in Florida. But geography did not stop us from doing what mattered most. Waiting weeks to watch the inaugural Nerve Awards together. First came the uniform, special order Troublemaker T shirts, cold champagne, remote in hand. Lisa's husband a closet mobro in denial, and her college age sons reluctant but. But bemused. Moboros in training hovered nearby. It took two hours to get through the show because they kept pausing to rewind it. They Less than a year ago, they write, you had us at quote, real news about fake people. That is the stated Mission of the Nerve. And we have since been slavishly devoted to each episode Drop. We come from where you come from. You talk our talk, you walk our walk. We just loved this Lisa and Renee. And then we have another one. Happy New Year to you and the team at Nerve Central. I just wanted to share. Oh, that, that animation, by the way, that is Lisa and Renee, which they took and sent to us. And this troublemaker writes, I just wanted to share this video I came across. We're going to show it. We're going to put it up as a still full screen which divulges. Now, this is allegedly reportedly from our troublemaker. But this, this tracks to me. Someone on Reddit did a deep dive into how much stock, as ever has stuck in the warehouse. How much? Meghan Markle. You know, this is when like, you know, entrepreneurs go on Shark, Shark Tank and they're like, yeah, you, you grew too fast and you didn't really realize like your, your market or, or who your customer is or what the marketplace is or who your competition is or, or even why you exist. And so you're going to have trouble unloading that stock. And for those reasons, I will not be investing. Anyway, back to the email. It's absolutely shocking. I do not know why on earth Megan keeps pretending everything sends sells out instantly while thousands of units are decaying in storage facilities. I have attached the screenshot from the subreddit post and the numbers are just jaw dropping. Okay, this woman cannot move merchants to save her life. But, you know, everything's great. Her life is. Her life is wonderful. Thank you for. Thanks. She's thanking the nerve for, for uniting all the good people willing to expose the web of lies that Meghan Markle has spun upon the world. The interview with Lady C. Lady Colin Campbell. She loved it as well. Yours truly, Arielle. Thank you, Ariel. We also have had a ton of positive, positive feedback to the travel show with Belinda Carlile. She will be on very soon as discussed. And we are going to announce our second destination. A quick reminder, keep your feedback coming. Email me at maureenevilmakeremedia.com or DM me on Instagram @maureen callahanriter or at the Nerve show. And remember to subscribe to the Nerves Substack. That's our weekly email that goes out every Friday. It did not, it did not go out the last two Fridays because even though we did have new content up for you guys, we were otherwise kind of taking a much needed break. If you happen to see me doing those ad reads on the mini the last one we dropped for the I saw myself and I was like holy. Like I need a nap. Anyway, our email our substack resumes on Friday. It drops about three hours after the the Friday nerf drops. So go over to thenerveshow.com you'll see a prompt to put your email in and subscribe. It's really, really fun. Coming up, some anti New Year's resolutions. The anti resolution resolution as it were. See you in a minute. If you're looking to eat cleaner in 2026, toss the chemical laden snacks and switch to Masa chips. Masa's tortilla chips are made with just three healthy ingredients organic corn, sea salt and grass fed beef tallow. No seed oils, no mystery junk and they're delicious, crunchy and flavorful. Plus, Masa chips will leave you feeling satisfied and light. No bloating, no sluggishness. My favorite chips are the original but they have a flavor full variety of flavors to choose from. And if you like Masa tortilla chips, you should try their sister line of potato chips, Vandy Crisps. Also delicious. I am partial to classic original. If you are ready to give Masa a try, go to masachips.com maureen and use code MAUREEN for 25% off your first order or simply click the link in the video description or scan the QR code to claim this delicious offer. And if you prefer in person shopping, Masa is now available nationwide. At your local Sprouts supermarket, stop by and pick up a couple of bags before they're gone.

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Maureen Callahan (58:23)

We are back now that we are firmly ensconced in 2026. You know, this is the time of year that the media industrial complex January calls New Year. New you. And so you're, you're just, you're just bombarded with a ton of, like, stuff coming at you in whatever mediums. On your phones, on your tv, it's on your laptop. It's everywhere. Hey, this is the, this is the nutrition program you should be on. You should be doing a fast. You should be doing dry January. You should be decluttering. You should be getting rid of toxic things and people in your life. You should be making yourself over. Now more than ever, January is the time to do it. I hate this stuff. It's garbage. It's garbage. You know, it's just junk. It's just designed to sell you stuff that you don't need. To that end, we are taking some offenders to the woodshed again. I gotta keep some of these people alive because they're up to stuff that we are going to be watching very closely. Okay, first, Hoda. Copy. Hoda is back at NBC again. You know, this time last year, this woman was in the throes of a goodbye send off a sayonar like no other. It went on for months and she was going to spend time with her two small adopted daughters. And guess what? She's back at 30 Rock. Every freaking minute she gets. And I don't understand how the, the, the. Her former colleagues have not banded together and demanded that Hoda be placed on the no fly list at 30 Rock at the Today show at Jenna's fourth hour. But here she is. They brought her back, I don't know why, to do some lame New Year's Eve special with, again, explainer to me, Jenna Bush Hager, the charisma vacuum that is Jenna Bush Hager. So here they are together in this New Year's Eve promo. Hey, everybody, I'm Hoda Kotb. And I'm Jenna Bush Hager. And we are so, so excited to be back together again. And we cannot wait to celebrate the new year tonight on NBC. So grab a glass and we'll see you at 10:39, 30 Central as we toast 20 20. Oh, my God. Okay. Okay. Yeah. That's how it works. That's how New Year works. You say goodbye to 2025. They're so moronic over there. They're so fucking moronic. Anyway, if you're, if you're listening and not watching, there's a, there's a great moment where they're, you know, there's like extras in the background, like probably employees they told to dress up and throw on some makeup, whatever. And there's this younger woman to hold his back, like, back, left shoulder. And she takes a look at Hoda and she, like, rolls her eyes extravagantly and then, like, turns her head away. It's amazing. Okay, now, Hoda, by the way, has been promoting this wellness retreat that she's doing in March on her Joy101 app. And we've been checking it, and she doesn't even have tickets on sale yet, and it's like two months away and. And she's claiming there's going to be some, like, thought leader in the wellness space that she can't wait to announce. Why not just announce it now? You know why? Because she hasn't been able to book anybody. That's why. I love that Joy 101 is failing. I love it. It's well deserved. Well deserved. Now moving on to the insufferable Mel Robbins, who is out here still. It's very fitting I have my Mel Robbins glasses today. You know, I'm like, catharsis, catharsis, catharsis. So she's out here again, New Year, new you, with her let them theory, which she is now cleaved into to because places like the Nerf have been calling her out on the in how just insipid and stupid. Let them is like the let them theory holds that you should just let people do what you want because you can't really control them. The only thing you can control is the way that you react to people. And to which I say that's a bunch of. Because what, you're just supposed to let people walk all over you or treat you? Like, get out of here. So now she's cleaved it. And it's, it's, it's a, it's a theory that's both let them and then let me. And the let me part me is the actionable part. That's the part where you take action even though it's in direct contradiction to the passive product she was pushing this time last year. Let them make it make sense, right? Make it make Sense. So where do you, where else do you go with inane bullshit like this? We go over to the Today show, go over to American morning television. Here's Jenna and Brooke Shields, who I think is frankly probably smarter than this. But I guess a gig is a gigantic sitting down with Mel. And Mel is giving advice for 2026. This aired on December 12th. Here we go.

Mel Robbins (63:08)

My husband and I have been doing a particular process since 2004, where at the end of every year we ask ourselves these six questions that help us get clear about where we're at right now. Because here's an interesting thing. So, ready to complete the dump dumpster fire that has been this year?

Maureen Callahan (63:26)

Yes.

Mel Robbins (63:26)

We just want to jump into next year, right? I don't want you to do that. I want you to take a beat and really understand. Where are you right now? Because it's impossible to give somebody a set of directions without two things. You got to know where you are and where you want to go.

Maureen Callahan (63:45)

Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? You need to know where you are, which holds true every second of the day in order to know where you're going. This woman is such a grifter. She really is, you know, it cannot be stated enough. She was once $800,000 in debt. She was day drinking, she was flitting around from job to job. And then she struck gold with this. And you know, she was on Sunday, the Sunday Today show, over the weekend with Willie Geist himself, an EPO baby, a middle aged guy who looks like, you know, you know, at the end of the Empire Strikes Back and Han Solo is like in, is frozen and he's like this, it's like, it's like Willie Geist was like in one of those chambers and they took him out and they defrosted him and he was placed there in 1952 and he woke up in 2026. And because he looks like a weird guy from like, like, like a family sitcom in the 50s and he's got like zero charisma. He's not a wit, he's not an interesting guy. I don't know how he got this job. Like, NBC is littered with these people, but here he is talking to Mel Robbins and taking her bullshit seriously. Okay, here we go.

Mel Robbins (65:08)

In case no one else tells you this, I wanted to be sure to tell you I love you and I believe in you.

Maureen Callahan (65:13)

And I.

Anthony Michael Hall (65:13)

And the Mel Robbins show was just.

Maureen Callahan (65:15)

Nominated for a Golden Globe Award in the new category of best podcast. What was your reaction when you got that news?

Mel Robbins (65:23)

I'M thinking, oh, God, we're not going to get it. They're going to say somebody else. And then they said our name. And it was this surreal moment.

Maureen Callahan (65:34)

She had someone, doubtless an assistant or a grown child. Same thing. Tomato, tomato. Taking video on their iPhone as they watched the nominations and Mel exploding in joy with her arms over her head, pumping her fists, going like, yay, yay, yay. Okay, first of all, I thought you were just supposed to let them, like, let them nominate you or let them not. I thought you were just not supposed to care. I thought you were supposed to be a Zen Buddhist about this. But she really wants it. She really, really, really wants it. Secondly, they opened that clip with Mel on her podcast talking to her followers and going like, I believe in you. You know, like just. It's just like blanket bullshit, pablum. That is just disgraceful. And this woman is making money hand over fist on the miseries and problems of other people. And she. I don't know. I. I hope the IRS is looking into that little empire. I really do. Okay, now we're going to get to the part of the segment where I'm going to talk about New Year's resolutions and why I think they're bullshit. Lena Dunham took to Instagram over the holidays again. No, nobody's asking for this. It's unprompted. She felt the need to share why she doesn't make resolutions. I don't think she's a person to be taking any kind of life advice from any kind of life advice at all. She has eaten herself into morbid obesity. Okay, this is not a well woman. Her caption on Instagram while flashing a good chunk of her midriff. She wrote this on December 23, 2025, I'm going to puff pass on the New Year's resolutions because I recently quit my last earthly vice. Not so sister. Your last earthly vice is whatever it is you're eating. But let's not talk about it. Lena writes, except to say that it starts with a V and ends with popcorn lung vaping. Okay? And then so she decides she goes instead of my usual resolutions list. So she used to do it. I took my foot off the gas and okay, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Wrote in my latest substack about this is great. My ear and audiobooks. The women and queer owned brands haul I did on Black Friday and a no holds barred review of Olipop's recent spate of cream flavors. I don't even know what that means. I. I don't Know, and I, I don't care to look into it, but this leads me to why I don't believe in New Year's resolutions. And I, it, it, it bums me out because I, people are always asking around this time of year and it just feels like, like a herd mentality kind of thing. Like just, well, everybody's doing it, so I guess I'm supposed to be doing it. I firmly believe that real change, real profound tectonic change that you want for yourself takes a very long time and it happens incrementally. And it sometimes happens when you're not even looking or you're not even trying. But whether it's leaving a bad relationship or trying to quit a habit that's terrible for you, or trying to get a foothold in a profession that you really, really want, you know, anything, it's, it's, it often, it can take years. It can often take years. And then, and then one day, like a light switch will go on and you will have realized this goal that perhaps you gave up on and you thought you might never reach. And that is like just the real hard work of being human. The real hard work of, of, you know, the, the cliche is a cliche for a reason. There's truth to it. Often it's two steps forward, one step back. You know, I've talked about how it took me five tries over years to quit smoking. I loved smoking so much I thought I would never be able to quit. But it turns out I, I was really, really trying even when I would beat myself up after every time I failed to make it stick. So I think New Year's resolutions are a bunch of bullshit. Okay, that does it. That does it for our Tuesday edition of the Nerve. Come back and see us tomorrow for the Nerve at Night. We've got a banger for you. And our special announcement, our Bonus Nerve. We're doing a live stream this Sunday at 6:30pm ET for the Golden Globes. We have two very special, well loved guests joining us. All of you will be able to join us too. Give us your feedback in real time and we'll chat throughout the show. We're going to be doing some red carpet verbal beatdowns. It's going to be great. And we're going to have tons to talk about too, just in terms of the movies and the shows nominated. And prop master Emily is hard at work on a whole new set. And we have all the info on the Nerves Instagram page that's at the Nerve show, so be sure to check back there for information. Paul from New Zealand has already worked up some incredible art again. If you haven't already, check out our substack@the nerveshow.com be sure to subscribe. Plus nerve merch grab something for yourself or pick something up for a fellow troublemaker at your shop, the nerve.com also, you can listen to the Nerve on Megan's Podcast Playlist every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 9:00am Eastern on the Series XM channel 111, the Megan Kelly channel. And we will see you back here tomorrow at the Nerve, where you will never guess what we're about to say next.

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